May 21
Tony taking Peter to a doctor for a regular checkup is the worst experience of his life because Peter is physically impossible.
Doctor: His reflexes are… concerning.
Tony: concerning how.
Doctor: I dropped a pen and he caught it before I did.
Peter: that’s normal.
Doctor: ...
Doctor: Also his metabolism is absurd. How much does he eat in a day?
Tony: Don’t ask questions you aren’t prepared for.
Peter: Mr. Stark bought six boxes of pop tarts yesterday.
Tony: correction: you ate six boxes of pop tarts yesterday.
Peter: in my defense I got thrown through a billboard.
Doctor: excuse me?
Tony: don’t worry about it.
