#dialougue

"I'm going for a walk."

"It's raining."

"Let me rephrase that. I'm going to get food."

"Didn't you just witness those holy water slapped my face the moment I open this damn door?"

A: B? Why is there a dragon in the kitchen?

B: Oh, him! Meet Owen!

A: B!

B: ...what? He's harmless!

*dragon lets out a puff of smoke in agreement.*

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A: I will slay you with my mini sword of justice!

B: That's...that's a pencil.

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A: Foolish mortal! You cannot defeat me!

B: Watch me. *proceeds to tickle A until they are begging for mercy.*

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A: The floor is hating B!

*person A and C jump on various pieces of furniture, while B face-plants on the floor.*

A and C: No! B! Stop that!

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A: C! Should I get a ferret?

C: Yes! *grins at B*

B: I am NOT having a ferret in my house!

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A: *shows B a picture they drew* Do you like it?

B: Yes.

A: if you’re going to criticize my children we can take this outside!

B: ...?

A: Oh...you liked it?

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A: You can kill someone with just about anything. Take a pencil, for example. If you stab someone hard enough in their jugular, it will kill them.

B: *Nervously* Thank...you for that really random fact... Please don't kill me tonight.

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A, with his leg stuck in a chair: Now, you may be asking, "how did you get yourself in this situation?"

A, trying to get unstuck: Well kids, A doesn't know either... STOP LAUGHING AT ME B, AND HELP ME!

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A: Kids, please quiet down or I'm going to turn the car around.

B: SHUT UP OR I'M GOING TO CRASH THIS THING INTO A WALL!

C and D: *Screaming*

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C: So what happened when B asked you to be his/her boyfriend/girlfriend?

A: I panicked and screeched.

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A: You young homosapien with XY chromosomes!

C: What? That makes no sense.

B: *sighs* He's trying to say "BOI" in scientific terms.

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B: Why is there a box of puppies in the kitchen?

A: Cam we keep them?

B: Absolutely not!

A: *Puppy eyes*

B: One. You can keep one.

A: Yay! Thank you!

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A: Ok, so if you want to come with me, you have to either pose as my sibling or my date.

B: I choose to be your date.

A: *Furious blushing*

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A: Anything's possible!

B: Thanks C.

C: That was A.

A: Seriously, anything could go wrong right now.

B: ...Thanks anyway.

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A: Happy Valentine's Day!

B: Is...is that an actual heart?

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C: A, pass the salt please.

A: *Picks up B and hands him/her to C*

C: Why are you like this?

Friendzone: Between you and she.

Hermione: never have i ever kissed someone

Draco: *bursts through wall*

Ok so, i deffinetly brought this upon myself but whneever me and my family are playing a game or watching something i will find the worst character possible and just casually say "Smash"

Why do i do this?

I like their reactions, it's funny, it's hilarious, and I want to do it.

My brother's reaction is always the best.

Me: "... Smash."