guys i seen my dad today and he kept touching my ass , thought you all should know 😛😛😛

once there was this dude whose urine, for whatever reason, contained an outsize amount of zinc and a bit of copper. After a while, after obsessively checking through his diet to ensure that he wasn't accidentally consuming a massive quantity of metal and after being thoroughly evaluated by the (bemused and quite concerned) doctors, who, despite their misgivings, declared him healthy, he decided that if this is going to happen regardless, he may as well make some money off it - he decides that, whenever he has to pee, he's going to collect it in a bucket and filter out the urea and other waste products to allow the copper and zinc to precipitate out, so it can be sold. One day, however, while he is doing this (out in the woods to avoid toxic fumes), he happens upon a long, multi-legged insect, steadily spiralling its way up the oak directly in front of him. Despite the innocuousness and innocence of this creature, he is, nonetheless, terrified of it, and flinches sharply, scrambles to get away, in the process of which he drops his urine bucket, which spills across the forest floor, its contents quickly absorbed by the soil. "Ah shit," he says, rather frustrated, as he was planning to use the money he would obtain from this next load of zinc and copper to acquire a nice, oil-cloth jacket, "Fuck. The cents I peed!"

Reiji the Ironclad? More like Reiji the Electroplated!