#dialoge

*Crowley and Azi watching doctor who* 9th: I think you need a doctor. *kiss scene between Rose and The Doctor*

"Yes~"

"Hello baby, I'm uh, how do I put this..."

*Dazai slowly putting his pen down and clasping his hands*

"Chuuya where are you?"

*suspicious pause*

"I can tell you where I'm not."

"..."

"Osamu-"

"Are you at the fucking animal shelter!?"

*in background Kunikida is fuming, Ranpo is cackling, and Yosano is recording*

"..............Maybe."

"No."

"But babe-"

"I said no."

"Princess, can't we-"

"No Chuuya! You already have three dogs at home. Why are you even at the animal shelter?"

*Yosano begrudgingly hands money to Ranpo*

"Osamu-"

"You already adopted another one didn't you?"

*Chuuya looks to the dog sitting beside him*

" ...I just signed for her."

"I swear Chuuya! You know how I feel about the dogs."

"She's not that big."

*the dog: literally huge*

"WE DON'T NEED ANOTHER DOG!"

"She was lonely Dazai, I could see it in her eyes."

"I. DO. NOT. CARE!"

Character B: Darling, if you acted like a lady, chances are I would treat you like one. But as it is?

Character A, flat/sarcastic: My, aren’t you a flatterer.

Blaise calling out the entire trope of fake relationships in on swoop, including the plot of Cordial Enemies 😂.

Character A, calmly: Unhand me.

Character B: Or what? It’s not like you can stop me.

Character A, scoffing: No. But I can and would retaliate.

1. “Don’t tell me what to do! It’s my curse.” 

2. “Oh, just kick me off this cliff! It would be merciful at this point!”  “I can’t do that my liege, I was charged with-”  “With keeping me alive, yes, I am aware.” 

3. “I thought you’d be scarier.”  “Excuse me?”  “Well, I don’t know. I just thought, ‘reclusive vampire who lives on a mountain, he’s probably scary’ and . . . .”  “And?”  “And taller. I thought you’d be taller.” 

4. “Your mother always loved you best in red.”  “Yes, well my mother also always loved me best in prison so I think I’ll go with the blue.”