#detectiveverse

She was doing her make-up for a military gala when she heard small footsteps approaching her, eyes big and curious “Mama, what is that red thing?” He pointed at the bar on her lips. She smiled at him.

“It’s lipstick, but it’s too strong for you. Do you want to try on some?”.

His eyes lit up with eagerness “Yes, please!”.

She smiled wide and reached a coral pink for him and said “Say ‘a’” He did as instructed and she applied carefully the lipstick on his thin lips and beamed at the result as she lifted him at the height of the mirror, a proud smile on her face “Like what you see?”.

“Yes! Thanks, Mommy, you’re the best!” He hugged her and she kissed his head, growing and growing with messy, blonde hair.

“What are you two plotting now?” His father’s question made him tense. He has heard some stories of fathers going nuts because some boys had tried to be ‘girly’.

“My love, look at him! He looks handsome, doesn’t he?” His mother beamed.

Ernest knelt down to examine his boy better and then smiled widely, ruffling his hair “You look great, my boy”.

“Really? Aren’t you mad, Papa?”.

“Why would I? There’s nothing wrong on being feminine or doing something ‘like a girl’. In fact, you’re being very brave”.

“I… Am?”.

Hayley was smiling, eyes glistening with emotion.

“Yes. You are being unapologetically yourself, and that is a brave trait of yours. You’re being braver than me when I was your age”.

The boy stood there before hugging his father, telling him how much he loved him “Thank you, Papa”.

He cupped his son’s face in his and said “Never be afraid nor ashamed of being yourself and demand being respected with love and respect, because it’s a human right, alright?”.

“Yes, Dad”.

“Besides, you’re doing no harm to anyone!” Hayley commented, a smile on her face.

Growing up being ‘feminine’ was at first hard. There were some bullies who’d scream when Elliott was either walking or doing an exposition ‘fag!’ and everyone would laugh.

Every night, Hayley or Ernest would talk to him, telling him how beautiful and valid he was, no matter what other people said. Even Alaska would tell him how much she loved him and admired him.

The rest of the family noticed this, especially Bart and Vincent, who would show him off to boost his confidence. One night over scotch and some jazz, Ernest and Bart talked about what it would be raising a kid like Elliott, the kind of kid Bart was once.

Hayley bought him all the glitter and colourful clothes, even if that meant some moms blocked her, stopped talking to her and even trash-talked her. Ah, the debates and arguments she got into… But she always stood up to his kid and allegated that she would never ask his son to change who he was just to please people that never treated him well in first place and that if they didn’t like it, they could go fuck themselves.

One day, in lunch, something awesome happened.

Elliott was minding his business with his lunch when a group of girls approached him, giggling and smiling at him.

“Do you girls need something?” He asked.

“Well… we’ve come here to say a few things to you” the girl said “One: I love your style! Like, where did you get that glittery shirt?! It’s amazing!”.

“Also, your nails look ideal! I love the colour! Light blue suits you!”.

“That… and Amelie wants to say something to you” The leader smiled as other girls giggled.

The blonde girl approached him, shy and nervous. She looked at him a few times, trying to find the right words before slamming a kiss on his cheek while thrusting a piece of paper on his chest and returning to her spot. The girls squeaked and squealed in delight as Elliott blushed furiously, catching the letter “I, um, thank you…?”.

“Do you wanna sit with us?” The girls’ probably second-in-command beamed. Elliott smiled widely

“Of course! If the rest is okay with it”.

The girls squealed in delight as they grabbed him and sat him on their spot. Some of the boys scowled and glared at him. But he didn’t care.

He spent most of the lunch talking about fashion and Disney’s newest TV show as the Amelie girl looked at him with something he couldn’t quite place. But he didn’t mind.

At long last, he felt great at school.

That night, during dinner, Elliott decided to ask his parents a question “How do I know I want to kiss someone? Or that I fancy them?”.

His father nearly choked on his wine while a 12-years-old Alaska laughed. His mother chuckled as she looked at her husband in a way of talking. He nodded and she said “Well, when you want to kiss someone, there’s these signals that you must know: if you like them, if you feel safe and wanted, looking at each other’s lips, that small tension between the two of you… the chemistry. Why, my boy? Who is the lucky one who caught your eye?”.

Alaska kept laughing before his father shoot her a look and she focused instead on the food, not without sometimes stare at the scene before her.

“I, uh, the thing is…”.

“Speak up, son. No one’s going to judge you”.

“I have been invited to a sleepover with some kids of my class and I overheard the usual hosts that they will play ‘Spin The Bottle’ and then giggled as they wondered who they will kiss” He flushed pink as Hayley opened her eyes wide before letting go a shocked laugh.

“That’s curious. Luke’s girls will attend to another one of their class, too”.

“Percy told me that these parties end up with two people dating. That’s where he met his first girlfriend”.

Hayley caught her son’s hand and caressed it “Oh, my boy, you grow so fast! You have half of the school at your feet!”.

Elliott flushed as his father shook his hair with an amused smile on his face “Thank you for trusting us with this, my boy. I know how embarrassing this can be”.

“I mean, you’re my Mum and Dad, we’re a family”.

“Don’t tell me he’s getting a phone sooner than me!” Alaska goaded.

His father gave her again the look and she huffed.

In the sleepover

Mrs Kenner was a great host, making four pizzas for the whole group and bonded over many things. He noticed that there were only three boys aside of him. Jackie, Bobby and Jordan. The rest were all girl: six girls, between them Chloe, Veronica, Lizzy, Sandra, Amelie and Nicole.

“Oh my God!” Lizzy gasped “Anthony and Barbara kissed! There’s a video!” Everyone except two of the boys took a peek.

“Barbara? Like, Barbara Harper?” Elliott asked.

“Yes! I’ve Heard your Mum and her dad are long-term friends. Is it true?”.

“I guess. I never ask my Mom about her friends…”.

After some giggling, they went to Nicole’s bedroom, where a bottle and some board games were ready for use.

“Let’s do some quizzes! Maybe on Monday we can surprise Miss Honey with our improved learning skills!”.

At first it was great. Elliott only had one question wrong, which made the leader of the only boys scowl. Veronica called him to sit beside her and the girls giggled. He settled as Nicole announced “It’s official: we’re playing Spin The Bottle!”.

The girls squealed in delight, but Elliott felt mortified. He looked around as he remembered what his father told him of his first kiss, when he was also his age:

“I was so clueless and mortified! I didn’t even move, so the girl made the move and told me that I just had to close my eyes, part my lips and cock my head to the side and I’d be fine. I was a bit clumsy, but it turned out nice. First times are always clumsy and awkward, but with the right guidance and a bit of confidence, it can turn out in a great memory”.

He woke from his entrance as he saw that the bottle was towards him and the girls were looking at him expectantly. He shook his head “Sorry, girls, I wasn’t paying attention. What is happening now?”.

“You have to kiss Nicole” Chloe explained, excited.

“Oh, of course. Um, sure” He got up and coughed awkwardly “Um, let me know when you wanna stop or you’re uncomfortable”.

“Eeee! He’s a gentleman, like his dad” Lizzy squealed.

Nicole took his hand confidently as he gulped the hole on his throat and guided her towards him, parting his lips and closing his eyes. In a brief moment, their lips touched sweetly and gently and it was over as it began. The girls clapped and squealed as the boys nodded in approval.

Nicole smirked at him “Not bad. Maybe it’s true that you’re just as a great kisser as your sister… or father”.

“Please stop talking about my father” He pleaded.

He sat as the game continued as many kissed: Bobby and Lizzie, Amelie and Jack, Veronica and Jordan and Elliott and Chloe. The last one smiled while kissing him and whispered in his ear that his lips felt like pillows with the taste of mint and it was nice to taste. He flushed furiously and nodded.

“One last round, guys, before going to bed!” Nicole announced.

The bottle spun until it landed over Jack and girls giggled. Jack spun the bottle until… it landed towards Elliott. His eyes went wide as the boys looked at each other. Jordan laughed “Are you kidding me?! You’re gonna kiss a boy?”.

“Shut up, Jordan! Boys can kiss boys and girls can kiss girls! Look!” Veronica and Lizzy kissed each other as Jordan huffed. Elliott stood up and offered his hand to Jack, who took it shyly.

“You don’t have to kiss me if you don’t want to—”.

“No, it’s fine. It’s just a kiss. Three seconds and it will be done” Jack proposed.

Jordan was about to say something when Nicole glared at him and he scoffed.

Elliott took a shaky breath as he helplessly looked at Jack’s thin but tempting lips. He noticed that Jack wouldn’t do the move and his heart was hammering on his chest. The words of his mother thundered in his head

“If you truly want to kiss someone, you’ll know and everything will fade for a brief moment”.

He grabbed Jack’s face and kissed him gently, feeling like flying. He felt Jack relax on his touch and kissed him back, focused on the sensation. Kissing Jack was… another whole level. He felt it right, he felt great and smiled in the middle of it before Jordan pulled them away.

“Enough! You said three seconds! It’s been a minute!”.

“Jordan, I—”.

“I don’t want to play this dumb game anymore. Let’s go, boys. Let the fag and the girls do whatever they do”.

“Jack, I’m sorry, I—”.

“It’s alright, no biggie. It was just a kiss” He mouthed “Talk later?” And left.

His shoulders slumped and sighed as he sat on his seat and the girls hugged him.

“Don’t listen to Jordan, he’s a jerk”.

“I don’t know why does he hate me! I have done nothing wrong!”.

Veronica kissed his cheek “Don’t think about him now. Let’s talk about something else!”.

The rest of the night went great, watching a movie and eating sweets as they talked about everything. Elliott felt like he belonged here, with them, in their awesome world. He called to his mom to let her know that he was having an awesome time.

Finally, time to go to bed came and he slept beside the girls while the boys slept in the living room. Some girl giggled as they whispered to each other about who was the best kisser. Pretty sure he heard his name, thing that made him blush. The girls looked at him “D-do you need anything?”.

“Tell me, Elliott, who was the best kisser of any of us?” Veronica asked.

“Yes, tell us!” Amelie beamed.

“I assure you, we won’t get mad. Girl rivalry over men is so 2007!” Nicole declared.

“Well, um… The best kisser for me was—and it doesn’t mean that any of you are bad kissers—for me was… Chloe.”

Chloe giggled and threw him a kiss, but Nicole narrowed her eyes before smirking “Bullshit.”

“Wha—”.

“You kissed all of us because you’re polite like your dad!”.

“Girls, if I have offended you—”.

Amelie placed a hand on his shoulder and took a deep breath “Elliott, it’s alright if you’re gay. We actually feel bad because you had to kiss us to impress us.”

“Besides, homophobia is so 1950s!” Nicole commented.

Veronica smiled “So don’t be silly and go talk to Jack! It’s obvious he likes you too!”.

His eyes lit up “Truly?”.

“Go check yourself. We’ll keep Jordan and his acolytes distracted.” Said Lizzy.

He hugged the girls and went running to the living room to find Jack on the sofa, waiting for him. His heart beat like a hummingbird and sat beside him, giving him enough space. Jack looked at him, his brown eyes and redhead hair looking incredible under the light.

“Hey.”

“Hi.”

Uncomfortable silence as they heard whoops and cheering from upstairs. Jack cleared his throat “So…”.

“So”.

“About the kiss, Jack, I—”.

“—Liked it too.” He confessed.

He felt his heart thumping so fast and hard it threatened to spill from his chest as he looked at him “Truly?”.

“Yeah. You’re a good kisser, Elliott.”

“Y-you too, but I need to know… Did it mean something to you?”.

They looked at each other for a brief moment before kissing again, this time awkwardly and passionately before pulling back and giggle.

“So… to be clear… are we boyfriends now?”.

“If you want to…”.

He kissed his cheek “I do.”

5 years later

Elliott was 14 when he broke up with Jack. He was crying, made a pile of glittery mess and his eyeliner was all over his face as he hugged with one arm the pillow and with the other one, his sister Alaska, who was 17.

“Oh, dear, do you want me to retrieve your caramel ice-cream? Watch movies with quesadilla and a pizza as big as our entire bodies?”.

“I WANT MOM!!” He wailed as he cried harder, clutching his pillow “Why did he broke up with me?! What have I done so wrong?!”.

His mobile phone chimed and Alaska took it and she scowled at the text of the jerk that made his little brother cry “That little motherfucker…”.

Elliott, I’m sorry, but this was gonna happen. You’re too… girly for my tastes and everyone wants to bang you and I don’t feel the sparks anymore. Have a good life tho.

Elliott read the message and cried harder as Alaska cursed “I’m gonna kill that motherfucker!!! Where does he live? I’ll kill him!”.

“Alaska, that’s enough. We got this.” Said her father, giving him a severe fatherly look that made Alaska grunt and leave the room and Hayley got in, placing her precious boy on her lap, drawing ghosts on his back and nodded to her husband, who went to calm down their daughter and avoid a murder.

Hayley silenced her mobile, full of threats towards the boy who broke her godson’s heart.

“Oh, baby, my poor baby boy.” She kissed his head, face and forehead as he trembled and shuddered, full of that horrible experience such as teenage heartbreak.

“I…I…I… Don’t know why. Three days ago we were just fine, talking and laughing when I received the text this morning and I… why does it hurt so much?!”.

Hayley cradled him on her arms like she used to do not so long ago, calming down his cries like he were a toddler again and he was scared of the thunderstorms. He hugged her, hard, never letting go and she didn’t complain. She, too had the thought of breaking the jaw of the jerk of Jack –she never liked him—but she understood that he needed comfort and love, not a cycle of violence. She started to sing a lullaby, his favourite when he was a new-born baby and he gripped her even harder. She sang it over and over, never stopping the patrons on his back and telling him how loved he was and how he’d recover from it, that he was also a Parker.

During a year and half, Elliott was destroyed, looking like a wingless angel, never wearing his heels and make-up, making some dumb boys mock him for going ‘straight’ again, especially Jordan. The girls defended him and stood by him and coming over the house to help the family heal the heartbreak, buying him his favourite food and taking him to the therapist and spas, spoiling him until one day, he got out of the bed.

Hayley and Alaska pretended to mind their business, but it was difficult. He started to do a make-up like the TV series Euphoria, flawlessly done and put on a coral pink matte lipstick and added glitter to his face and headed to the painting academy, where everyone clapped and he smiled in a very, very long time.

Some of Alaska’s contacts texted her that Elliott seemed like he was finally over Jack and was interacting with the class and making spectacular drawings and patters, leaving in awe to everyone and even greeting again the girls with a peck on the lips and giving opinions on the girls’ crushes… he was normal again and Alaska ran to her parents to tell them. Ernest gave that very unusual smirk and added “I might have had a man-to-man conversation with him for hours while you girls were at the Carnival and that must be the motive he’s back being his old self.”

Both women showered him in kisses as he laughed, with his awkward laugh and kissed both of his girls before heading to work on some paperwork.

“Elliott, wait!” A voice called from afar. Elliott stopped on his tracks as he sae him. Jack. He sprinted towards him and then said abruptly “I am so sorry for what I did. I wasn’t thinking clearly. I fucked up and I was scared because you were my first boyfriend and I want us to start again. I want to take you back, Elliott. I—I love you!”.

He looked at him shocked before glaring at him, shaking his head “You’re bluffing, right? You really thought that I would never find out, right?”.

“What are you talking about?”.

“That you cheated on me with the whole soccer team and even tried to seduce my sister? That you kissed tons of boys in the bathroom and talked shit about me when no one was looking? You think that I am dumb enough to take you back? Nu-uh, honey, not happening! Go fuck yourself.”

“Elliott, I—”.

“Save your excuses for someone who actually believes in them. Besides, if you really loved me, you would have never cheated on me and would have kept it on your pants!” He snapped his fingers and stroke a diva pose “Besides, cheating on someone and alleygating that you love them is a very lame 1990s boyfriend.”

The girls cheered “You tell him, Elliott!”.

“Drag the cheater!”.

“Cheaters deserve no rights!”.

Jack scowled “Whatever.”

“Buh-bye, bonnie bun!” Elliott mocked as the girls cackled and the boys started to chase him, bullying him for the nickname that his mother called him “God, it’s incredible when you love yourself!”.