#corey.

“i wasn’t flirting , i was being friendly .”

I tell myself I wouldn’t look at my Snapchat flashback stories but I’m just laying here feeling sorry for myself and full of hurt and jealousy and maybe I’d see a video of me at a club or me with a friend but I should have known myself better. I remember this day. I made breakfast. We were going to meet up with a few friends for brunch then be with his brother the rest of the day... Why can’t I be happy for more than a couple days? Do I lack this happiness chemical in my head too probably? Do I just have the most terrible luck? I hate you. I don’t feel wanted by people at all. An entire year I pushed people away and stayed to close knit of friends to then open myself to someone who I thought was opening up to me and understood me but to then be dumped and later haha find out the person he was also seeing promised him he was first priority. I was never told this. My best friend is crazy for this guy I was dumped for too mind you haha! And I find out like another person is obsessed with this guy I think I’m jealous? Maybe this all started with my dad never being there. I had to fight for affection from my abuela and abuelo and I got it. It wasn’t given to me it was earned but my heart is just so pure. I miss Harry lots and I really wish he was around more or like at least showed some affection for me on dash just a lil bit more. I know he loves me. God I know it I just, I want to do those cute couple things too. I love him so much :( I’m jealous and I’m afraid and I wish people would fight for me and love me because all I do is love people back and not asking anything in return. When I feel safe and guarded and like I trust someone, everything back fires and I’m like what did I do wrong please just tell me :(