This post tells you how to prepare one easy, good meal. It's not necessarily nutritionally complete, but it has protein (meat), carbs and vegetables. It assumes almost nothing about your cooking skills, except to recognise the foodstuffs. It consists of foods which, even if you don't quite cook them right, won't do you any harm (and honestly, you could probably eat them all raw). It is not suitable for vegetarians; I'll cover some vegetarian food in a later post, because it is, on average, more difficult.

The whole meal will take about 4 hours to prepare, but much of that time is leaving the food to cook. You'll be busy for the first half hour and the last 45 inutes, more or less.

(I think roast beef, potatoes and vegetables are one of the most cottagecore meals out there, beaten only by pies. We'll come to pies in a future post, too.)

You will need the following equipment: A stovetop or hob with at least two rings (heating areas) An oven A roasting tin, baking tray, or oven-proof dish Some tinfoil (aluminum foil) Two saucepans or pots (steel if using an induction stove) A chopping board A meat-cutting board (which might also be the chopping board, washed carefully after use) A medium-large knife (which I call the "big knife" in places) A vegetable peeler or smaller knife Access to a sink, or at least a tap A timer of some kind (an alarm clock, a timer or alarm on your phone, or the like) A large fork (this is for holding the meat still to cut it; you might be able to hold it with your hand instead) Ideally, a potato masher, but an ordinary fork will do. Sufficient plates, forks, and knives for people to eat with

You will need the following ingredients:

A beef roast (this is a large piece of beef; there are many kinds. Literally any of them will do for this) of about 1kg (2.2lbs) or more. If you get it without wrapping, ask the seller to weigh it for you. Otherwise, make a note of the weight. Some potatoes Some carrots Some broccoli Some butter Some milk Some salt Some black pepper (pre-ground, or ground at the time of use from a pepper mill)

There are no pre-written amounts for anything but the meat, and even that is an approximation.

Heat the oven to 150C (300F, gas mark 2). If it's a fan oven (you can look in and see the fan at the back), set it to 130C (265F) instead. Make sure there's nothing except the wire shelves in the oven before you heat it. Place the beef in your roasting tin, baking tray, or dish, and shake some salt and black pepper over it - about twice as much salt as you'd put on a plate of fries, and enough pepper to be visible on the surface of the beef. Add about 200dl (a cup) of water to the container, so that it pools around the beef. Cover the beef loosely with tinfoil, making sure the edges go inside the container, not outside. Once the oven is hot enough (usually this is indicated by a light going out), put the beef in its container in the oven, and set a timer or alarm for 3 hours.

Now, peel the potatoes. This can be done with a smaller knife or a vegetable peeler. Be careful not to cut yourself; you can go slowly. There is absolutely no rush at this stage. The peeling does not have to be pretty - we're going to mash these potatoes - so don't worry about that either. Cut the potatoes into very approximately golf ball sized pieces. Take the bigger of your two pots or saucepans, put the cut potatoes in, and pour in enough water to cover them, plus about 1cm (half an inch) more. Leave these aside; they're now ready to cook, but we won't do so until later.

If your broccoli is one large piece, cut out the stem in the middle with whichever knife suits you. Alternately, cut off the smaller "floret" branches one by one - what you want is a number of the smaller branches, the finger-thick ones. If your broccoli comes as florets (sometimes frozen), you don't need to do this. Indeed, if your broccoli is frozen, leave it in the freezer for now. Otherwise, put the florets to one side.

Next, take the carrots, chop off the top and bottom (about 5mm/a quarter inch from the end for the thicker top end, and about 1cm/half an inch from the end for the narrower bottom end). Peel the carrots with the vegetable peeler or knifer, holding the carrots with one hand and cutting away from that hand with the other. Once you have all the rough outer skin off, chop them into coin-like horizontal pieces, each about 5mm/a quarter of an inch thick. Set them aside as well.

You now get to go do something else until the alarm goes off.

When the alarm goes off, open the oven and CAREFULLY take the tinfoil off the beef (use oven gloves or a dry towel to protect your hand reaching in). Close up the oven and set an alarm for 30 minutes.

Now, put your pot of potatoes and water on the stove top/hob, and set that ring to the highest it can go. When it comes to a full boil (when the water is bubbling madly and there's a lot of steam rising), turn it down so that it remains just barely boiling (simmering).

Now, take the other saucepan/pot, and put it on the other ring. Half fill it with water, and set it to the highest setting, so it comes to the boil. Once it does that, put in your chopped carrots - be careful not to splash yourself - and turn the pot down like you did with the potatoes. Add some salt to the water - a small handful is what I use here.

It's now time to check if the potatoes are done. They probably won't be, but it's useful to practice. Take two forks, and stick one of them into a potato in the boiling water. CAREFULLY. If it goes in and comes out easily, the potatos are cooked. If you have to push it in hard, and/or the potato lifts out of the water when you try to pull the fork out, they are not yet cooked. If they are not yet cooked, use the second fork to hold the potato while you pull the first one out, and put it back in the boiling water.

You now want to wait a few minutes, and your timer is in use. You can set a second timer for 4 or 5 minutes, or you could sing yourself a song (most rock songs, solo included, come in around 3 minutes; prog rock and Bauhaus can be way longer). Or you can just watch a clock for a few minutes, although I find my attention drifts. Hold on, it's not that long.

Once 4-5 minutes have passed, check your potatoes again. If they're done, take them off the heat, and carefully pour the water off them. Remember to turn off the ring on the stove/hob. Some of the potatoes will try to roll out of the saucepan; hold them back with the larger knife (or some other implement; it doesn't matter what as long as they don't escape). Put them aside for a few moments. If they're not done, try them again in a few minutes, and then take them off. It might take a few goes; that's ok.

Now add the broccoli to the pot of boiling carrots. You COULD do them in a second pot, and sometimes I do, but this saves on washing up, and makes sure that everything cooks in about the right time.

Your 30 minute alarm will go off soon. Turn off the oven, and CAREFULLY, using oven gloves or a towel, take the roasting dish with the beef in it out, and set it aside to "rest" for a bit. Meat straight out of the oven is difficult to cut; it'll be much easier in 15 minutes or so.

Meantime, back to the potatoes. Take your masher, or fork, or whatever you can find to crush them into crumbs and pulp. Once they're fairly well-mashed, add some butter and some milk. You want a good bit of butter - a golf ball sized chunk is good, I feel, and just a little milk, a couple of spoons full. Mash the butter and milk into the potatoes until they're smooth, adding more milk in small amounts if you need to. If your butter is salted (it will say on the packet), you're fine, otherwise you'll want to add a little salt. Taste a little bit before you add a lot.

When you're finished the potato mash, take the carrot-and-broccoli pot off the heat, turn off the ring, and pour off the water, again holding back the vegetables with the knife or whatever you used for the potatoes. When they're drained, put in a little butter, let it melt on them, and stir it around.

It's now time to cut the beef. This does not have to be pretty! Hold the chunk of meat down on your cutting board (or the chopping board you used for the vegetables), ideally with a towel under the board so it doesn't slip around. Use the big fork or your hand (possibly with some kitchen paper or a small towel or something) to hold it still, and cut off slices with the big knife. They can be as thin as you like, and can manage, but about 1cm (half an inch) thick is fairly easy.

Everything is now ready. Put some mashed potatoes, some vegetables, and some slices of beef on each plate, and tuck in. Ideally, someone else should do the washing up.

This flip book zine shows the process of eating one of the enormous Swedish cinnamon buns (Kanelbulle). Inspired by an experiment on myself.

Dieses Daumenkino Zine zeigt den Prozess eine der enormen schwedischen Zimtschnecken (Kanelbulle) zu essen. Inspiriert von einem Selbstversuch.

Ingredients:

500 gms Chicken

3 – 4 Medium Onions (roughly sliced)

10-12 Green Chillies (You can adjust the number as per your taste)

3-4 Tbsp Ginger Garlic Paste

2 Tbsp Lemon Juice

3- 4 Black Pepper

2- 3 Cloves (Laung)

1 inch Cinnamon Stick (Dalchini)

3 Tbsp Cashew Nut Paste (Kaju Paste)

¼ Cup Fresh Cream

¼ Cup Curd (Dahi)

½ Cup Oil

Salt as per taste

For…