#commitment issues

You can still feel his skin on your lips…

You smirked but it fell quickly. Then cringed at your self. One of your hands running over your face. Jealousy isn’t only a sign of romance right? But just friends doesn’t seem exactly right either. Okay so what happened was..

You just returned to HQ from doing nothing in particular but just out alone. Dinner should be done soon. So instead of grabbing a snack you opted to wait in the hangout room. As you approached you heard loads of laughter and running.

The doors were already open as laughter bounced down the hallway getting louder as you got closer. Fu’s sixth sense went off as he stopped to stare at the doorway. “What are you doing?! Amo told you not to stop!” Amo lightly but not really pounded her fist on Fu’s head.

Pillows, cushions, blankets all across the floor. Furniture moved to the sides of the room to make a clear space. Everyone teamed up into pairs. Stacked. Playing chicken presumably. Others sitting on the edge probably the ones who got out quicker than the others.

The only ones left standing being Remlin on Guita, Rudo on Gris, and Amo on Fu. Rudo sparred with Remlin. Gris on his knees to even out the playing field because the two kids are short. Fu running circles not to get caught. Rudo knocked them down grinning and telling Gris to stand up and charge to Amo.

“Hey you’re back!” Riyo spotted you. You walked over to her and Zanka. “Great. It’s about to get ten times louder in here.” He said side eyeing you. “Woah Zanka hold your applause.” You replied with a half ass grin, eyes darting between him then Fu.

Riyo seemed to notice before dots started connecting. Meanwhile, Fu’s eyes also kept darting between the pair in front of him and you and Zanka. It was the last battle but it wasn’t as exciting due to how awkward it is. Rudo and Amo were I don’t even know how to explain it.

Awkward, obvious, and flustered?

Not a crowd thriller. That was until Riyo cheered on Amo. Fu also looked at you for maybe some sort of encouragement. You stared at them and Fu felt as if he had done something wrong maybe? Your eyes were so distant. Like you were in thought? Your eyes were on him but you weren’t looking at him if that makes sense.

Fu getting caught up in his head as well caused them to lose and fall. Rudo and Gris taking victory. People cheered but you walked up to Fu. The boy stood up to help Amo up but you stopped him. Arms wrapping around his neck from behind. “I missed you.” You cooed in his ear.

Fu stiffened but smiled nonetheless. Playing with his fingers. Rudo helped Amo up as she congratulated him on the win. “Are you gonna play next round?” Rudo asked. “You totally should! I’m sure Zanka won’t mind if you took my place. Imma sit this one out.” Riyo offered ordinarily. But with a plan in mind.

You turned towards them. Fu still in your arms while you stood behind him. Resting your chin on his shoulder. You opened your mouth, wanting to decline but someone else spoke before you. “Or you can have Fu this round. Amo will take someone else.” Amo said innocently but it still struck a nerve.

I don’t need permission he’s already mine.

You smiled but that didn’t reach your eyes. “I’m tired so I’ll pass on this whole thing. I’m going to go to my room actually.” You faked tiredness. There it was again, the feeling like Fu did something wrong. “You can stay and have fun.” You mumbled against Fu’s neck.

“Yes ma-am!!” Fu shouted so loud it made everyone look. His face went red and you just smiled before leaving. You went to your room. Not feeling like eating anymore. And that’s why you’re here now.

You could still feel the warmth of his skin. Letting out a giddy giggle before slapping your face. This is why you don’t do romantic stuff. It’s frustrating. You don’t even know why you felt so possessive. It’s not actually like you two are dating.

Despite feeling- jealous - you held no ill feelings towards the two. The only person you’re mad at is yourself. Not just for feeling this way. But also thinking about Fu like that. But the most feeling you feel right now is cringe. You felt cringed out for even feeling jealous.

Your ears perked when you heard the door handle jiggle. You forgot you locked the door. Opening to reveal non other than Fu himself. Fu held a plate of food and his other hand looking like he was about to knock.

“Hey.” He nervously gave you a smile. “I got you food.” Fu held out the plate for you. You stared at it happy before your stomach turned. “I’m not hungry.” You put the plate to the side before taking his hand and leading him to sit with you. Fu smiled at your touch and followed you unknowingly.

You two sat on your bed. Letting go of his hand but his not letting yours go. It’s now or never. “We should take a break.” You exhaled quickly. Fu’s heart dropped. “What?” He asked mindlessly. “I need time to myself.” So basically she hates me and thinks I’m annoying.

“I can switch rooms, you stay here.” She doesn’t even want to share rooms, she wants to be as far as away from me as possible. Fu started shaking and you noticed. You always do. “You can follow Enjin. He’s bossy.” She thinks I’m clingy and repulsive! “Okay..” Fu said looking like a puppy that got kicked.

This is good.

After a while apart you can forget these unwanted feelings. They’ll go away and you and Fu can continue being friends. Romance isn’t your thing you have other things to worry about like being the best and brightest star. It doesn’t make you stronger sulking in these feelings.

So for the next week that’s all you’ve been doing. Ignoring the feelings and even your friends. Didn’t have time to talk too busy over working your self again. Work out, do your job, and pass out. That’s how you spent your free time. Yup. It’s what you wanted right?

Fu on the other hand was going through it. The first night alone he stayed in the room for the rest of it. Next day Follo came to fetch you for a mission but only found a sad Fu. Follo being not the best at comforting people called for backup (Gris). Once Gris asked what was wrong Fu started bawling all over again.

“Y/n hates me and never wants to talk to me again and it’s all my fault for being clingy and annoying. I don’t want to lose her, not Y/n. I don’t know how to live without her! I don’t know what to do!!” Fu cried as his drawn on mask started to run again with what little pigment was left.

After good advice and a suggestion to take it easy, Fu finally fell asleep. He slept a lot that day and stayed in your- his room. Gris made his way to find you. But to no avail.

The next day he caught you to ask what was up but you waved off his concerns. He asked around but nobody knew anything.

The day after Riyo came to talk to you after Gris’ questions and how she noticed you weren’t very present. Which is usually a big sign something is up because you’re always present. But you apparently talk in riddles when you’re upset because she didn’t understand what you meant by.

“It’s just a silly phase I’m going through. I’ll be over it in a few more days. This is just a minor setback.” What ever that meant. But she was still there when you need.

One more day forward you started to crack.

“What!?” You asked. Although maybe it is best if you didn’t go. “They left early this morning. They’ll be back in a few days.” Semiu hummed. The cleaners for team Akuta plus Fu left for a few day long mission. “Why wasn’t I invited?” You asked a bit bitter.

“Because I wanted to have a chat.” The boss said walking into the room. “I’d love to but Delmon actually needs help watering Tamsy! Fun fact Delmon is the reason Tamsy’s hair sprouts to the side like that. Very important task..” You started to step away but Korvus put his hand on your shoulder.

“You can talk to Semiu if it makes you more comfortable.” He offered. “Semiu gay as hell I don’t think she can help with boy problems.” You shook off the suggestion. “My sexuality does not limit my wisdom.” The woman raised a brow. You sighed and reluctantly talked.

“I am just worried for Fu…” You mumbled and the two adults shared a look. “Oh? Why’s that?” Bossman asked. Damn it. Semiu’s choker com rang. It was Enjin with loud music and lots of laughter. He was calling to ask about directions or something. You didn’t listen. You only heard Fu laughing.

Oh, so he is okay. That’s good!

You pushed Korvus’ hand off your shoulder gently. “I’m okay really. Get a little of track but now I’m back on it. Speaking of, I should go train more.” You said with a solemn smile. “Haha don’t tell me the great Y/n is afraid.” The man said with a small chuckle. #reversepsychology

“Me afraid? Nothing scares me!” You tried to laugh it off but for some reason his word pissed you off. “Of course not. How could I expect anything less from the kid who laughs in the face of danger.” Korvus patted your head one last time before leaving.

Me? Afraid? What would I even be afraid of?

The whole day you spent in your mind more than usual. You even stopped training early to think. You’re not afraid. Boss man is right, I laugh when I’m faced with something scary. Labeling what I’m currently feeling as afraid is stupid. Afraid of what?

Is he implying I’m afraid of feelings? Not me I’m in my prime I can’t be committed to just one thing. Even if that thing is a person. Who you miss. And have been struggling to maintain consistency since departure.

It’s not departure if it’s only for a short time. It’s not like you moved to canvas town. But even the thought of being far away makes you feel icky. Okay maybe the thought is a little frightening. But! The thought of loosing him is even more scary. Maybe even the most scariest thing you can think of.