#codmw3

most would skip straight to air head when describing you. no one with half a brain needs to be told how to open an old google doc. no one needs to ask for a 'big, strong man' to reach something only on the third shelf. and neither did you, but not when it came to him.

his distinguished, professional demeanor is a direct contrast to your lacy push up bras. people wondered how the two of you met, how he tolerates you. it might have something to do with the cute pout on your lips, wide eyes that dilate when he's near, obsessed with him.

while initially finding it annoying, he's realized your pretend-stupid act is more of a show than it is reality. people are more likely to help you, compliment you, even congratulate him on pulling such a gorgeous partner. they also tell him to take care of you, make sure you don't lose your own head, but that's besides the point.

he swells with pride (and a little jealousy) when people do a double take, greedily drinking up your bubbly appearance. it's cute to him when you send photos of the free drinks you've gotten, courtesy of the love struck bartender who believes you "forgot your wallet."

no one else sees the real you, the one he fell in love with. the one that's disgustingly educated, has read every classic novel known to man, the extremely intelligent doll he worships every day. the ditsy act is for your own enjoyment, and to get special treatment, because who doesn't love that?

"& how many times have you loved me without my asking? how often have i loved a thing because you loved it? including me."

You’ve been warned. (MALICIOUS WHITE BOY ALERT)