People narrow their eyes the first time ghost talks about his "sweet girl"
Ghost is...well. a loner. He's socially awkward at best and aggressive at worst. Ghost kills people without flinching, looms in every corner He's in. No way he has a 'sweet girl' at home.
And yet, that's exactly what he tells the team our night at the bar. Mouth half-stuffed with greasy chips, he grunts "my sweet girl could do this better. Lovely cook."
After he broke the news about her, it was all he'd talk about.
Ghost, the guy who turns people into a fine red mists then laughs about it is the same guy that smiles "my sweet girl wants to see the movies tonight, you know how it is, cap." Or proudly shows off the lunch he's brought from home with a "i made it myself. My sweet lovie is teaching me 'ow to cook."
Always on and on about his sweet girl, about his lovie, the best thing in his life. Like a lovesick puppy.
"Oh!! Hi, simon! Glad to see you back in one piece!" You smile at your neighbor when he enters the elevator. Almost instinctively you hand over your heaviest grocery bags.
Simon, your neighbor, smiles around the scars and presses the button for you. You've been living next to him for a few months now, and embarrassingly you keep finding excuses to spend time with him. Though, you doubt he would ever reciprocate your little crush.
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he can't remember the last night he slept for more than four hours in a row before waking up - either to the tail end of a nightmare or just because his body has decided that it's time for him to stare blankly at the ceiling instead of enjoying some well deserved time unconscious.
that is, unless he's using you as his personal pillow.
head on one tit, hand on the other, eyes shut and drooling as he sleeps his way though a lazy sunday morning.
you glance down occasionally from where you're scrolling on your phone, seeing the way his eyelashes flutter and the corners of his mouth are almost curled into a smile.
Summary: a lonely and rejected witch catches the eyes of the four vampires that just moved into town. Their deep desire for the witch has only just begun.
Word count: 2.k
Warnings: harassment(not from 141), fighting, violence, stabbing, blood, polyamorous
Note: the vampires have special powers! To not get confused lol.
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The room felt cold when you opened your eyes. The morning sun beaming through your bedroom window, basking the room in a golden glow. the morning has a bite to the air that makes you chilled, but that won't last long now the season is getting hotter. Rolling over, you look towards the window, seeing how you accidentally left it cracked from the night before. You lowly groan, finally lifting yourself up out of bed, your feet touching the cold floor while your bones crack as you stretch.
Looking at the clock on the bedside table, it reads "9:24am" you sigh, knowing you were planning to go to town today. The towns folk didn't greet you with warm smiles like they did with each other, they glared and looked the other way. The towns folk knew you were a witch, so naturally they were afraid of you, humans were always afraid of the unknown. Walking up to the window, you close it shut, making the room more quiet. Might as well start getting ready now.
~♡~
Walking along the forest surrounded path always felt like a blanket of doom rested on your shoulders, heavy with dread as you thought about how the village folk will look at you once you stepped out of these woods. With nothing but disgust and fear. Shaking your head, your grip tightens on your leather bag strap, theres no point in wallowing in their judgment. But the anxiety continues to weigh down heavy in your chest, making you frown.
until it suddenly lifts, disappearing quickly and is replaced by a warm and lighter feeling of content. It makes your skin feel warm against the chilly morning air. You stop in your tracks, taken off guard by the sudden change in mood. Now looking around as if it would help you figure out what had caused the mood shift, but you find nothing but trees. The sun beaming through the leaves make the thick forest spotted with glowing gold, lighting up the ground in its wake. But you still find nothing between the swaying trees.
Theres a moment of silence while you stand there in the middle of the path, letting yourself feel the energy of the space around you. You can feel a faint foreign energy you've never felt before while taking this path, but the warmth flooding your body covers it well, making it impossible to tell what it could be from. After a moment of simply letting the warmth sit in your chest, you decided to continue on down the path. Shaking your head at your ridiculous reaction. Its probably just you accepting that the towns folks opinion is shit, or a hidden panic attack.
Making it to the village didn't take long, especially with the new found determination to get your errands done and get home before nightfall. You stop by multiple shops during the day, buying fruit, vegetables, ingredients, books, and supplies to last you another few weeks, the more you get this supply run the longer you will get to wait until you have to return to this forsaken village.
The sun is setting as you enter the last shop of the day. The bell above the door rings out through the stone walls, alerting the shop owner. A old woman dressed in scarves and layers of fabric emerges from the back room, making eye contact with you. She smiles at you "well well! Look who's back" you offer her a smile back "good evening Eleanor" Eleanor is the only villager that was ever nice to you, she doesn't judge a book by its cover. Always offering you a bright smile and kind words. You are greatful she doesn't ask questions either.
you take a look around her shop. Medicines in bottles on the shelves where they usually are, along with bandages and other Medical idems. "What have you been up to lately?" Eleanor asks with a hint of mischief in her voice, making you look towards her behind the counter. Only to find her already looking at you. "Um" you look away from her "just been focusing growing some new herbs in my garden" you look back to her form "Why?" You question her, knowing she never usually pries into what you do outside of the village.
"Well" she starts "The village has some new neighbors. They live somewhere in the forest im guessing. Have you met them?" She says it casually, making you shrug while you take a bandage for sale off the shelf. "New neighbors? I can't say ive noticed anyone out of the ordinary" you say. Which makes her laugh "they are definitely out of the ordinary all right" that makes you pause, frowning your eyebrows in confusion at her words "How so?" She beams, almost to excited at the idea of gossiping "they're vampires" the words hung in the air, the silence thick with tension that seemed to be only coming from you.
Vampires? You think, you've never encountered a vampire before, let alone multiple of them. "Vampires?" You say, putting the medicine and bandages on the counter to pay for them. Eleanor nods her head "isn't that something!" She leans closer over the counter "maybe you five could be friends! They are lovely gentlemen, good on the eyes as well if i do say so myself" she winks, her wrinkly face smiling as she teases. Five? Theres four vampires here!? Your mind is full of rushing thoughts, how did you not feel their energy? Surely you would've felt them by now.
"Here you go dear" Eleanor pulls you from your thoughts, handing you your purchases without a bag, knowing you'll just shove them into your magical leather bag anyway. "Now listen" she beckons you closer to her "be careful in those woods you hear?" She pats your face, her rings cold against your skin, before sending you out the door. Telling you to turn the "open" sigh to "closed" on your way out as she heads to the back room to clean up for the day.
The sun is fully set when you step out of the shop. The sky is a midnight blue as it covers the land in darkness, making you realise you have to walk back through the woods in the complete dark. You huff out a frustrated sigh, eleanor with her gossip. You make your way through the dimly lit village, passing by shops that are now closed. Your footsteps lowly echo on the stone sidewalk, followed by crickets and the sound of frogs in the cracks of the builds.
Suddenly you feel a drop in your stomach, a sickening feeling of alarm shoots through you as you walk, your intuition blaring red sirens in every way it could. Before you could react to the dark feeling, a hand grips your arm tightly and pulls you roughly into the dark ally beside you. Your world spins as your thrown into the stone wall. Two voices are heard laughing "we were waiting for you, witch" a mans voice cuts through the air, making you look up to see two male villagers in front of you, looking at you with smug smirks on their faces.
The other puts his hand on your jaw, slamming it back into the concrete, making you let out a small groan of pain whilst your head spins in dizziness. Fear fills your body while you reach to open your bag and find something to protect yourself with, but one of men yank it the strap over your head and throw it to the ground. Theres disgust on their face as they look at you, before a wave of eerie excitement crosses one of them "Ive been wanting to do this this the moment i heard there was a witch over staying its welcome" he reaches to the side of his belt, before pulling out a slick blade. It gleams in the lantern light, striking more fear into your heart immediately.
You don't notice it immediately, but you can feel it before you see the dark inky shadow wrapping its way around the man beside the one holding the knife. His yelp making your head turn to him as he suddenly goes flying into the wall in front of you, hitting it with a loud crash. The wind knocked from his lungs as you and his friend watch him get thrown to the ground in shock. A shadow now forms above him. Dark as a void as it stands tall, its face is dark but you can make out a rough shape of a skull. Its energy is dark and incredibly angry.
The man with the knife tightens his grip on it, his breathe getting faster as he looks at the shadow, before turning to you. "Damn witch!" He thinks this is one of your spells. But you can only stare in shock at the dark figure. Until a sharp angry pain blooms across your stomach, making you yelp out in pain and drop to your knees. "Bitch!" The man tries to take off running out of the ally, but one of the shadows tendrils wraps around his ankle, making him trip and land on his stomach.
The man screams in fear as the shadow throws him around angrily, knocking him into his friend thats already on the ground. You watch in terror, thinking you're next. Blood seeps through your clothes as you lean back against the wall, the pain from the stab is almost unbearable. "Hey bonnie" a Scottish accent says, their proximity very close to you. You jump, turning your head to be met with a man crouching in front of you. When did he get there? His eyes flicker to where your holding your stab wound, worry evident in his gaze.
He switches to his knees, inching closer to you "let me see" he gently grabs your arm, pulling your hand away from your stomach. You make a sound of pain, your breath coming out uneven "I know hen, its okay" he says softly. He glances back to where the shadow is fighting the two men, before looking back to you. His eyes locked on yours "you have to trust me okay?" He doesn't wait for your reply as he reaches his hand out and puts his hand gently on your stomach.
His touch is warm, immediately making the wound no longer bleed or hurt. Your breath starts to slow, your head getting drowsy. "They got you pretty good didn't they?" He says lowly, His other hand reaching up to rest on your head, somehow already knowing the villagers smashed your head into the wall. The pain from your wound is no longer there as he keeps his hand steady on your stomach. A warmth that can almost be considered hot radiates from his hand, soothing you even while the two men get dealt with in the background.
Darkness starts to cloud your vision slowly, feeling yourself beginning to fade out of consciousness between him and the wall. "You're alrigh'" you can't seem to feel fear anymore even while you slip into darknness. His reassuring energy mixed with the comfort of healing makes it easy to let yourself go. The last thing you catch before passing out was the sound of two new voices echoing off the alleyways stone walls, speaking words your mind can't comprehend in your sleeping state.
To be continued...
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Note: thank you for reading my beloveds! If you liked it please let me know :3 <3
simon ghost riley x female reader / anal sex / first time for reader / 18+
You're nervous, the thin cotton of your nightshirt twisted between trembling fingers.
The bathroom door swings open and Simon emerges, a cloud of steam following him into the bedroom. He’s towel-drying his hair, water droplets trailing down the defined planes of his chest and following the inked paths of his tattoos before disappearing into the waistband of his loose sweatpants. The clean, masculine scent and that something uniquely Simon fills the room, making your stomach clench with anticipation.
"Eyes on me, love," he says, catching your gaze in the mirror. He tosses the towel aside, his movements fluid. When he turns to face you fully, the obvious bulge straining against his sweatpants makes your breath catch. "Something's got you all worked up tonight."
He crosses to the bed, the mattress dipping under his weight as he sits beside you. His hand comes to rest on your thigh, thumb stroking slow circles through the fabric of your shirt.
"Spit it out," he says, his voice dropping to that low register. "What dirty thought's been running through that pretty head of yours?"
You swallow hard, feeling a blush creep up your neck. "I... I was thinking about us. About... what we do." Your fingers tighten around the hem of your shirt.
Simon's hand slides higher, fingers brushing the edge of your panties. "What exactly, baby? You know you can tell me anything."
Taking a shaky breath, you force yourself to meet his dark eyes. "I’ve never... no one's ever... I've never done anal before. But I've thought about it. A lot. And I want to... with you. Only you."
The surprise in his eyes quickly gives way to something darker, more intense. His hand moves to cup your jaw, thumb stroking your lower lip. "Is that what's been making you so squirmy? My girl wanting her tight little arse played with?"
You nod, unable to speak, your heart racing at the directness of his words.
"Fuck," he breathes, his voice dropping an octave. He shifts on the bed, and you see his cock thicken against the fabric of his sweatpants. "You've been holding out on me, love. All this time I've been fucking your sweet cunt, wondering what it would feel like to stretch out that other hole." His other hand slides around your waist, pulling you flush against him so you can feel the hard length of him pressing against your hip.
"Gonna make it good for you, princess," he murmurs, his lips brushing against your ear. "Gonna take my time opening you up, get you so wet and ready you'll be begging for my cock. But first... Let me get a proper look at what's been tempting me."
A few nights later, you’re laid out before him, vulnerable and exposed. Face down on the mattress, knees spread, with your ass arched high, a position you'd once been too self-conscious to even consider. But Simon was obsessed, his hands constantly finding their way to you, muttering about how perfect you were, how he could spend hours worshiping every inch.
Tonight, he’s doing exactly that. His tongue is buried in your dripping cunt, swirling around your clit in maddening circles. But his focus drifts higher, toward that place you've only ever shown him in your most vulnerable moments.
"Simon," you gasp when you feel his tongue circling your tightest hole.
"Relax, love," he murmurs against your skin, the vibrations making you shiver. "Gonna take care of you. Been dying to taste this pretty little arse."
His tongue presses more firmly, teasing your rim, and you can't help the whimper that escapes your lips. The sensation is intense, and his hands knead your flesh, thumbs spreading you wider.
He alternates between your pussy and your ass until you're a trembling mess. When he finally pulls back, you feel the cool air against your wet skin.
"Need to prepare you first," he says, reaching for the lube. "Don't want to hurt my girl, though I know this tight little hole is gonna feel like heaven."
The first touch of his lubed finger makes you tense instinctively. "Relax for me," Simon coaxes, his free hand stroking your lower back. "Breathe out when I press in. I've got you. so fucking beautiful. Can't believe you were ever shy."
You exhale as his thick finger slowly breaches you. The stretch is intense, a burning sensation that makes you gasp. "Si-Simon..."
"I know, love. Just give it a minute." He waits, completely still inside you until you adjust. "That's it. Fucking taking my finger so well."
He works a second finger in, then a third. His fingers scissor inside you, gradually preparing your body. All the while, his other hand continues its soothing strokes, his deep voice murmuring words of encouragement.
The thought of him—this lieutenant of yours who had surely been with others this way before—ruining you, claiming you, sends a fresh gush of arousal from your cunt, soaking the sheets. You’ve imagined it so many times. The jealousy should be crippling, but instead it just makes you wetter, makes you want to be the one he claims so thoroughly.
"Touch yourself," he commands softly, his voice a low, gravelly rumble. "Want to feel your ass clench around my cock while you fall apart for me."
Your hand shakes as you reach between your legs, fingers finding your clit. You circle it, matching the rhythm of Simon's fingers.
His filthy words push you over the edge, your orgasm crashing through you with unexpected intensity. You cry out into the pillow, your body clamping down on his fingers as pleasure radiates outward.
"Good girl," Simon praises, withdrawing his fingers. "Now you're ready, aren't you?"
You nod, breathless. Simon moves behind you, the sound of his sweatpants hitting the floor making your heart race. You feel the blunt head of his cock pressing against your entrance, and you instinctively tense.
"We'll go slow, but I promise you'll love it, princess.”
You do as he says, feeling the incredible stretch as he enters you. He’s much thicker than his fingers, and the burn returns, more intense. But Simon is patient, pausing after the head is inside, giving you time to adjust while his thumbs massage your lower back.
“Fuck, Si…”
"Doing so well for me, love."
He pushes in further, inch by excruciating inch, until he's fully seated. The fullness is overwhelming—strange and intense—but as he begins to move, the burn gives way to a deep, satisfying pressure.
"Simon, it feels... different," you manage to say, your hands clutching the sheets.
"Good different?" he asks, his rhythm steady.
"Yeah," you gasp. "Really good. Different, but... fuck, so good."
Simon groans, his control fraying. "Thank fuck," he mutters, his grip tightening as he begins to thrust with more purpose.
His pace quickens. You can feel the tension in his thighs as he fights the urge to pound into you. He leans forward, blanketing your back with his chest, and reaches beneath you. His fingers find yours, intertwining in a gesture so tender it almost brings tears to your eyes.
"You feel incredible," he groans against your ear, his breath hot and ragged. "So fucking perfect, taking me like this. My brave girl."
His words send shivers down your spine, and your inner walls clench around him. One of his hands releases yours to slide between your thighs, finding your clit with practiced ease.
"Want you to come with me," he murmurs, circling the sensitive nub in time with his thrusts. "Can you do that for me, princess? Come while I'm buried in your arse?"
The dual stimulation is your undoing. Your orgasm builds, coiling deep in your belly before spreading outward. You cry out his name, your body arching back against him.
"Simon... oh god, Simon," you gasp. "Please... please cum in me. Fill my ass with your cum."
The plea breaks his control. With a guttural groan, Simon drives into you one final time, burying himself to the hilt as he releases. His cock pulses, hot jets of cum filling you so completely you can feel it deep in your belly. The sensation triggers another wave of pleasure, prolonging your orgasm as you milk him dry.
"Fucking hell," he pants against your neck.
He stays inside you as you both catch your breath, his weight a comforting presence. His hand continues to stroke your hair, his lips pressing soft kisses to your shoulder. When he finally withdraws, you feel his release begin to leak out of you.
Simon notices, reaching for a tissue. "Nothing to be embarrassed about, love," he murmurs, gently cleaning you. "Just means I claimed you properly. Every inch of you is mine now."
He gathers you into his arms, pulling you against his chest. His heartbeat thuds against your ear as his fingers trace patterns on your back.
"You okay?" he asks after a moment.
You nod against his chest, a contented sigh escaping your lips. "More than okay. That was... so good, Si."
Simon presses a kiss to the top of your head. "Never been with anyone like you," he admits quietly. "Trust me with everything, even this. Thank you, love."
You tilt your head up to kiss him, a slow, deep kiss that conveys everything. When you pull back, his eyes are soft, vulnerable in a way few ever see.
"Always," you promise, and you know you mean it.
He helps you clean up, his touches gentle and reverent. When you're both settled back in bed, he pulls you against his chest, your head resting on his tattooed bicep.
As you drift off to sleep, you can't help but think that some first times are worth the wait—especially when they're with someone who treats every inch of you like it's sacred.
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Summary: When getting a late night snack, Simon finds you and breaks down.
It’s exactly 2:36am
For some reason these past few days, you’ve been struggling to fall asleep. To much on your mind. Im your 23 years of living, you never did figure out how to turn your brain off.
You’re currently standing in the kitchen going through the pantry. All of a sudden you hear staggered breathing and quick footsteps. You reach for your gun on the counter, and hold it up aiming towards the hallway as the steps get closer. When the footsteps stop, you discover it’s Ghost. With no mask. His eyes are glassy and his hands are shaking. You quickly place your gun down.
“Simon..?”
He stands there, staring at you. He seems like he can’t believe what he’s seeing.
“Simon. Hey, talk to me.”
“Y-You’re here.” Tears begin to fall.
“Yeah, im here. What happened?”
He goes to speak, but nothing comes out. He falls onto his knees. You rush over and hold him, he sobs into your neck. He holds you tightly.
“I-I thought i lost you. You were s-shot. Your blood was everywhere.”
“It was a nightmare. You’re okay, Im okay. Nothing happened, love.” You brush pieces of his tear soaked hair from his face, and place kisses on his cheek.
He meets your eyes. He sees your concern and quickly sits up. He wipes his eyes and stands.
“Fuck.” He turns away, “You must think im such a pussy”
“Not at all.. i think you’re brave for telling me wjat happened.” You stand and take his hands in yours.
“Would you like to come back to my room? Might help you sleep, knowing im by you.”
“Yes please.” He keeps his head down like a sad puppy.
“Come on baby.”
a/n: Unfortunately this was just a little drabble so i probably won’t make a part 2. Have a great day💕
simon is a dinosaur when it comes to technology, which makes having a high-maintenance, drop-dead gorgeous bimbo for a girlfriend a daily test of his patience. he belongs in the dirt, handling mechanical parts and heavy artillery, not squinting at a glowing smartphone screen with his reading glasses on. but you? you live on your phone, constantly sending him updates, and he is absolutely obsessed with every single one of them.
right now, he’s sitting on his cot in the middle of a dusty base, staring at his phone like it’s an unexploded mortar. he had been trying to open a basic encrypted file from command, but his massive, scarred thumb hit the wrong notification bar entirely. instead of military data, a message from you pops up.
attached is a picture.
simon’s breath hitches, his jaw locking instantly behind his mask. it’s a mirror selfie you took in your bathroom back home. you’re wearing a tiny, lacy matching set, your long manicured nails gripping the pink phone case, your hair perfectly done, and your lips glossed to perfection. you look incredibly soft, completely plush, and your body is curved beautifully in the frame. you left a little text caption at the bottom: missing my big soldier boy, come stretch me out soon pretty please? xx
his heart hammers violently against his ribs. his thick fingers hover over the screen, suddenly terrified of deleting it by accident. he tries to zoom in to see the details of your pretty face, but his heavy, calloused skin taps the screen too hard, causing the photo to completely disappear and the phone to lock.
“fucking hell,” he growls into the empty room, a dark, dangerous edge to his deep voice.
he panics for a solid ten seconds, aggressively tapping the glass with a heavy thumb until the lock screen finally prompts his passcode. his knuckles are white, his breathing ragged as he maneuvers back to the messaging app. when your gorgeous picture fills the screen again, a low, guttural groan rips from his throat. the sheer contrast between his rugged, violent surroundings and your bright, hyper feminine, pampered energy makes his blood run completely hot.
he can’t even figure out how to type a proper response without hitting three letters at once. his large fingers clumsily tap out: miserable without you. don't delete this.
the ache in his trousers is heavy and immediate, throbbing fiercely against his tactical pants. he stares at the photo for another long minute, tracing the line of your soft waist with his thumb against the glass, wishing more than anything that his hands were on your bare skin instead.
adjusting his weight on the cot, he slides a hand down to grip himself through his trousers, his white-knuckled grip tight as he imagines returning home to his sweet, spoiled girl. <3
synopsis. a lover deem's themselves unlovable and creates a solution
════════════════════════════════════════════
Simon Riley knew the moment you jabbed his shoulder with his fist that he was in love with you.
Before he realized it, the affections he had for you were hidden in the layers of sitting next to you during meetings, shielding you with his body once the world became a battlefield, when his eyes unconsciously hunted for yours when he was in a room of people he didn’t recognize.
It only grew when your world got too loud, he would find you sitting on the floor of his room as your hands glided across the page when you began to draw. Those times were always filled with deafening silence, but you manage to make those moments sound pleasant when your pencil sketches lines and shadows of images that caught your attention.
On one occasion he decided to ask what it was you liked to draw. Your eyes would smile knowingly as it met his own and you’d just mutter, “Things I like…” It was always vague and he never understood it until he caught a page with images of those around you. Price with a cigarette hanging from his lips. Gaz out of uniform cradling a cat. Johnny sitting on the floor with a towel over his face after a run. Then himself.
Most of your sketches of him were never finished, particularly his hands and his face. The images were there, his shape was there, his mask was there, but never his eyes or any indicator of the man behind the mask.
“Was it difficult to capture my likeness?”
Your hands stopped sketching the world outside and you’d nod slowly, the kind where you’d nod to appease the speaker than to speak your truth.
He’d press you further because he wanted to know and then you said, “If I draw you exactly. I might never see you again.”
He’d tilt his head, ask for you to elaborate and as usual you’d respond to him with typical vagueness that fell in line with poetry he didn’t really understand.
He should have asked you more about it then.
—
Simon knew above all that he was an imperfect, ugly, hypocritical man. He knew it when he woke up in the morning and washed his face and what stared back at him was the reflection of his father. He can’t bear the sight of his own face.
Yet he hated how you made him tolerate it. Made him learn to like it, even a little bit.
When he’d brush his hand across the scar that marred his face he’d close his eyes and imagine it was your fingers delicately tracing the shape of his skin while you poured his cup with the poison of your tenderness.
He’d bring his hand over your own, squeezing softly as he’d bring his lips at the point of your wrist, grateful that you see him. Grateful that you could hold him longer than a second. Grateful that you could still look at him and still call him by his name without the ounce of bitterness that he looked the way he did.
He adored you so much it hurt to breathe when you were near, it hurt to be away from you knowing that when he’d glance at the corner where you’d draw, you weren’t there. It hurt to know that when he laid in bed he’d imagine that this flimsy pillow he pulled deep into his chest was you. He was pathetic when it came to you and always will be.
—
When his heart stilled at the realization of how much you complemented the days he spent with you he was star struck and so deathly afraid because he knew you realized it too.
You knew it and you liked him. You adored him. You loved him.
You said it yourself.
You said it looking at him dead in the eye, his face in your hands as you drew on his skin with coloured markers.
You said it on the cargo plane back to base with your face muddied with earth and dirt as you grinned at him.
You said it when you laid on his bed together with legs tangled between each other.
You said it when the car park was dark and your staggering footsteps trailed behind him when he forced himself to say goodbye.
Simon forced his gaze away from you as you ran after him. He forced every painful step he took forward and away from you because deep down inside he knows the moment he stops walking he will simply stay just for you. He forced himself to muddle those deep, honest words you spoke into twisted lies because he cannot allow himself to believe that for once in his ugly bloody life was he worth enough for someone like you to love him.
His chest stung when you wept behind him, begging for him to turn around to to simply just talk to you, and with every breath you took he simply kept moving forward. All you saw was the back of the man you thought you knew.
When the door slammed shut the sound of your cries stilled an echo within him and the muffled sound of your voice sounded like fingers pointing in his direction that said, that this happened because of you.
—
“Ghost…”
“I’ve got to go. Price needs to see me.” He didn’t spare a single glance in your direction and it stung.
“Ghost, please talk to me.” Your soft voice lulled him and he wanted to look at you, go down on his knees and apologize for making you cry, but he didn't.
Rather he pushed past you, shoulders brushing against each other as he could hear your voice call for him again.
“What did I do?” You quicken your pace to match his, “Please just- tell me what I did wrong. I’ll fix it- I’ll be better! Just please stop ignoring me like this-” You say, hurried and out of breath, eyes begging to meet him and your gaze was never returned.
He arrives at Price’s office, door just within reach when you step in front of him, blocking his path and for once after weeks of trying to forget your face, your voice, your presence– his world returns to him only this time its a still frame of your reddening face and watery eyes and he can just feel how much he hurt you. How much he took from you that he knows he can never give back.
“What are you doing?”
“Don’t give me that bullshit, Simon.” His body stilled at the sound of his name. Your shaking hands nervously squeezed to a fist, like the way you used to when you first became a part of the taskforce or when you take on a mission you lacked the confidence of fulfilling.
“What did I do? Please just-” Your voice cracks, “I want to fix it. I want to just talk and at least be– friends again..”
He stood like a formidable wall, casting you in shadows from the bright, gleaming ceiling lights only this time, this wall wasn’t protecting you anymore.
“Fix your act sergeant.” Your breath hitches and as his heart claws itself inwards he pushes on, “Since when have I ever cared about you?” He bends down to your level and the hands that once cradled you with fondness became vines with thorns that prickle and poked into your skin that bled.
His hand itched to wipe your tears only he dropped them down on your shoulder, pushing you aside. “I’m not your friend, sergeant. You’re most certainly not mine either.”
It was too loud and the lights were hurting his eyes.
He opens the door to Price’s office and you grab his sleeve.
Simon forces a sigh and rips his arm away from you as she shuts the door behind him.
—
He squeezed his pillow tight into his chest, pretending everything was alright, that he didn’t turn away from you, that he didn’t make you cry, that he didn’t lie to your face that you meant nothing to him.
But he knows that the damage has been done.
You hate him. You need to hate him. You need to hate him so much that his blood is fire against his bones. You need to hate him enough to hate himself. You need to hate him enough that he believes the lies he feeds himself because any ounce of mercy from your kind eyes will melt any preservation he had to ensure he suffered for you.
What he did is the right choice. Simon can’t allow himself to be loved by you when he knows by the end of the game he will simply just hurt you and everything you have built together.
He will hurt you more being with him than being away from him.
He is fire against your still waters and he knows he will burn everything around him that the warmth you thought eased your soul was destruction in disguise.
He will hurt you, scar you, bite you, and burn you so deeply that the marks of how much he destroyed leaves a mark on your heart and you deserve so much better than his flames. You deserve someone who doesn’t ruin you when they stay. You deserve someone who can nurture you to grow to someone better than who you are now. You deserve someone who can make you happy. You deserve someone who isn’t him. Simon Riley, the scarred face bastard who was so scared to be loved by you that he pushed you away hoping you’d forget him forever.
Simon nuzzles his face into his pillow, pretending it's your shoulder and the memory of what was stung and comforted him.
This is for the best. Even if it hurts.
—
From then on the eyes that used to linger on him and his form disappeared. Now they gaze at someone else, someone far more charming, kinder, safer. Someone who eased the nervousness of your shaking hands before an operation. Someone who stopped at the sound of their name being called. Someone who wasn’t afraid to hold you and be loved by you so loudly that it deafened everything around you.
It relieved him so much that you were in the hands of someone who can properly cherish you without hurting you.
It relieved him enough to breathe like his ribs didn’t hurt him. It relieved him that when he walks down the hall he doesn’t hear you right behind him. It relieved him that he didn’t have to hear you sketching in his room late in the afternoon when your world got too loud.