#clovia shaw

The Plague Rats.

I made these for Halloween a couple of years ago. We'd been talking about how everyone was doing Plague Doctors, and that Plague Rats would be more fun. They're made from fun foam.  

Cyndy: Okay, so before we start Lunar Ellipse, I have to tell you about this fandom.

C: iTunes screwed the pooch on this one, and put the episode up early. So for those of us who had the season pass, it was there before it aired by like, three days.

C: Naturally, other people found out about it and started buying the episode like mad.

C: They caught it pretty quickly, but NO ONE SPOILED THE EPISODE. It ran Monday night with those who hadn't seen it unspoiled.

C: I'm looking at YOU, #Divergent fandom.

C: Although I did watch it. And might have screencapped two things for FandomHopper. ;)

C: Okay… RIIIIIIIGHT HERE. See, they've had Dylan O'Brien in LAYERS for three seasons. Hence the fanfic where he's like 115 pounds. So Wet!Stiles was like WHERE HAS THIS BEEN?

He has ascended to the v-neck!

C: Yep. In a BIG WAY.

C: Also, I'm NOT quite sure why a server room was where the writers thought they would end up when they were dead.

C: Having WORKED in them before, I would think of it more as hell.

That tree stump looks like a class-project diorama tree.

C: Okay, so this scene is cool. It's showing them back in the woods they night Scott got bit.

C: This is actual scene. CGI budget had to be huge for this episode.

Hence the server room. Nice big white location to show off the wet t-shirts.

Yeah, I like the mustache better.

C: No. He calls himself THE APEX OF APEX PREDATORS. Weren't you listening, Isaac?

He had stuff on his mind.

C: Sweater shopping, scarf accessorizing, Allison eyefucking…

And Scott eyefucking, from that one epi.

C: Ah, that Stilinski charm. Accuracy over comfort.

Can the FBI do that?

C: Pretty much nope.

I don’t know why I keep asking these things.

GRRRR!

C: ICE BREAKERS!

C: Do you ever wonder where fight scenes would be today if not for The Matrix?

Or the warehouse district? Where would everyone’s cool, floodable loft be?

C: Or maybe it's Maybelline.

Oh no!

C: "a glorified dog whistle"

yuuup :D

Like dying.

Scott has a cunning plaaaan.

C: this is probably the result of fracking, you know.

Haha! fracking sinkhole.

C: Might explain what happened to Derek's Camaro, as well.

C: Eaten by a sinkhole. Better get me a Toyota mom van.

YAY! I was wondering when they didn’t revert.

Man, that lunar eclipse is nuts. Sinkholes, apex predator lightning, fog.

C: Demon wolves…

oops.

Is Deucalion gonna have to slap a ho?

C: Yes. Yes, he is.

Er, maybe you shoulda closed your eyes, Scott.

Awww.

I legit thought that was a big dusty spot on my screen, the way the fog looked.

None of these people have any concept of passing time. Your whole plot hinges on it!

C: Nor do the writers, that I can see.

C: This episode has me at all moments… except this street mime thing.

Yeah, the walking against the wind shit…

C: Combined with the invisible box.

It’s like a hobo moving his house from inside.

dun dun duuuuuuun!

K says, “of course she’s in a bad-girl corset for this part.”

C: And the bad-girl shoes, not the Easy Spirits. Good girls wear Easy Spirits.

And mullet dresses.

What are they, stupid?

C: This looks like Allison has a matching sweater. She and Isaac can wear them at their Ice-Breakers sponsored wedding.

I think it’s adorable they share clothes.

Is their French as bad as their cello? And shooting?

C: I don't know much French. Just how to get laid.

Baha! (with the door)

C: Aaaaaaaaand.. Danny gets trucked out for 30 seconds to be the token gay.

To be fair, that twin has been gay the whole time, too.

C: Yes, but he's a Bad Gay. Danny's a Good Gay.

Ermagherd, this bitch is made of--Ha! Peter! (She’s not made of peter, obviously, but I laughed.)

C: Yes, Peter, but you're not the APEX OF APEX PREDATORS, now, are you?

Cyndy: Visionary: tale of two unreliable narrators

gah! (arrow to the throat)

C: Note v-neck Henley with cleavage on Cora. ;)

Another henley!

C: I still keep waiting for him to start yelling at Starbuck.

C: My BSG fandom takes precedence over all others.

So what’s up with the veiny? Do we know yet?

C: Oh, you see that when they take pain.

Oh, okay, I didn’t notice it in the ER.

C: Dear actress playing Paige: THAT IS NOT HOW YOU PLAY CELLO.

It’s like a herd of flannel. A waxed herd of flannel.

Don’t look at the cello, Cyndy.

C: This drives me nuts. They can't take five minutes and teach them how to put your damn FINGERS on the strings??

C: Please go so I can practice NOT PLAYING THIS AT ALL.

C: I honestly have reached the point where I think Jeff Davis and the writers have NO IDEA how old any of them should be. The non-answers are to avoid more piles of retcon.

“Wait, do we multiply by seven like dogs?”

C: NOT FOR YOUR NON-EXISTENT CELLO PLAYING, GIRLY!

C: LMAO. I'm willing to bet that conversation has been had in the writers' room.

Dogs times healing factor divided by dracula = ….*scribblescribblescribble*

C: Also, how does she not realize he said he can SMELL BLOOD? Unless he is actually Bella Swan, that's not really something people say.

And from last week, I think he’s the only one who can.

C: ::snort:: Then again, the sweat and jizz smell on a bus of high school boys…

That is true. Also athlete’s foot.

THE APEX PREDATOR OF APEX PREDATORS.

OMG, I remember when she was little and on soap operas.

C: Wait… what? Did I miss a soap sighting?

Ha, sorry, I saw Deucalion and that’s all I could think. Oh, that chick was on soaps. Um, crap, I’ll have to think of which one…

C: Young Sheriff Stilinski… hey is that a fade? Was he a Kid 'n Play fan?

He was not a sunblock fan.

Ermagherd, Ave Maria.

C: WHITE MESH. ON ALL THE LACROSSE STICKS. AND AGAIN WITH THE NON-PLAYING.

Lol, I knew you were going to say that.

C: Now you know why I needed a break before this episode. It enraged me.

C: PRODUCT PLACEMENT AGAIN.

LORNA! from Another World. Okay, whew, that was gonna drive me nuts.

C: Ah… not my soaps. I was a CBS girl until 3, when I switched between Guiding Light and GH.

C: Another thing missing from this episode: AN IOTA OF SUBTLETY. The whole thing with an unreliable narrator is that YOU DON'T ALWAYS KNOW IT.

C: AND they messed up Baby Derek's eyes. Tyler Hoechlin has SUCH distinctive eyes. This kid has plain brown. Contacts are too expensive for regular eyes?

I’ve noticed that on other shows before, that the younger versions have the wrong eye color.

C: Deucalion's name has always driven me nuts. That's the damn name of Frankenstein's monster.

And also that was Abe Lincoln.

C: Well, Abe Lincoln was a vampire hunter, so, that works here.

Ooh, I like the mustache--better than just the beard, really.

I don’t know why any animals in fables take anyone across any damn rivers ever.

C: Slo-mo. Also, TOTAL lack of shirtlessness this episode.

But we did get v-neck henley cleavage earlier.

Fifteen in dog years?

C: I have no idea. Trying to figure out a timeline is like trying to decipher the U.S. Dollar against the British Pound. In Sanskrit.

It’s a trap!

Wait, not one of those guys was like, “Huh, he’s going for a valve, that’s weird…”?

C: Again, subtlety is MISSING ENTIRELY FROM THIS EPISODE.

C: THE LACRIMOSA OVER THIS. Honestly. HONESTLY.

The shadow of rain drops on his face…

Did he just turn fake Irish?

C: This whole episode is like using Mjolnir on a thumbtack.

Seriously with the soundtrack. It’s like they want me to laugh at her pain.

C: Oh, and with the accent, I think it's South African, not Irish.

All right. It just popped up hot there for a second.

C: On Deucalion, right?

On Grandpa, right before he stabbed out Deucalion’s eyes (spoiler alert). “A little short-sighted, don’t you know” kind of sound to it.

C: Oh. He has a really odd speech pattern on this show. No idea why.

C: This is the point at which I'm banging my head against the wall until I pass out.

Well, we know who’s *not* playing that cello.

Cyndy: So when this part of the season aired, I was hoping to wait for the whole thing to be done. And then I got spoiled and skipped these two because of reasons.

Oh no!

Now that is a horrifying way to maybe die…

C: Death by butterfly, you mean?

Yes, they always freaked me out when I was a kid, when the huge flocks, herds, whatever came through.

C: Mama McCall is like the real hero of this show.

K likes this one of the twins. Ethan.

C: Sorry… THIS is the Alpha pack's symbol. I got confused because at the end of the previous season, THAT was on Derek's door.

C: Also, BLECH, K. BLECH.

HAHA!

Ermagerd, a peplum.

C: So she's teaching English AND Science with her FFF.

SEE? That shit is freaky! That’s how it looked in TX sometimes, with the wings and the flittering.

C: Yeah, you have some horrifying bug things in Tejas.

Isaac is seriously out to eyefuck just about everyone. It’s his default eyeball. Juuuust, you know, thinking about it...

C: I wonder if there's an "average time to shirtlessness" calculation.

I’m sure. The focus groups were like “Nope. You lost me---annnnd I’m back. ”

Flannel seems to be the word of the day for this ep.

C: I tell you what a metronome is not: The blind werewolf with the cane who can't keep a beat.

I thought he was doing Shave-and-a-Haircut, then he wasn’t.

Has Scott never watched a kung fu film ever? The blind guy can always kick your ass.

C: Scott still hasn't watched STAR WARS.

Sure. Give a clue to Scott.

LET ME GUESS.

C: Tell me your dreams, Clarice.

What the hell is she wearing?

C: Oh, man. She has the WORST wardrobe. And a soccer mom haircut.

Yeah, I don’t care for her styling.

Really, she thought that was going to help? Here, let me put my hindquarters against you.

C: I love that you use "hindquarters" like she's a horse.

C: Look! Here's where the semen is. I mean….

Look, a horse head! (also henley--nope v-neck)

C: So how do these assholes think they will get out of here when they've flooded and electrified the apartment. Also, HOW DO YOU FLOOD AN APARTMENT?

Parkour!

Now, my boy, we have an awesome water fight!

Pull her toenails ouuuuuutttt.

C: This is his signature phrase.

“With my teeth?”

C: I'm going to rip your throat out. With my teeth.

With my teeth. Not these *fnickt*

C: Can we just say ley lines? These people have been reading fic for years. They'll understand you.

I can totally say ley lines :D

lol omg

AWESOME WATER FIGHT!

C: This is the loft of YOU ARE NEVER GETTING THAT SECURITY DEPOSIT BACK, DEREK.

AHHAHAHAHA! OMG, the water arcing

Look around, dude, make a hole with something. This is the worst mime ever.

C: God, how I hate puns.

WITH YOUR TEETH, DEREK.

So he can’t retract his claws when he’s mad, I take it?

They are terrible at catching people.

ONE BETA IN ALL THE WORLD.

C: Now imagine Sean Connery saying "only one can survive."

Now it’s nothing but Queen in my head.

That kid looks like he wants to eat that firefly.

Cyndy: This sounds so much like my kids: DUMBASS! You are going to kill the bug!

OOH! OOH! Run away!

Dig the muttonchops.

C: And yet the rest of him will be waxed like linoleum.

C: Lydia's bedding is the same color as Bella Swan's in Twilight. I know this becuase I have Bella's bedding. Set dressing: Target.

AHAHA! That’s okay, I was thinking of Allison’s metal wall art, “19.99 at Michael’s.”

C: First time I see Twilight I was all THAT IS MY BED!

C: When I go out at night to find a dead body, I ALWAYS wear heels and a miniskirt. Jesz… I didn't do that even when I was that age.

Please don’t be dead. Just be floating facedown and motionless.

C: They toss those in once in a while at the local waterpark to test the lifeguards.

Ah. Well the local lifeguard isn’t doing so good here.

C: Maybe he failed the test and they didn't want to pay severance?

There looks to be definite severance.

C: LOOK! LESBISONS!

I *just* smacked K on the leg. “Lesbians!” Oh, goddammit. Of course they’re going to die.

C: I just have to say I know like four gay Emilys. I'm calling stereotyping here.

NO. NO bug death.

C: Emily: Deader than a shitbug. By the shitbugs. ;)

They sure do like to open themselves up during the swing, no?

C: See? Parkour!

lol

C: Now, The Shining reference is okay. My kids have friends who are into watching old King movies.

C: A purity ring. On a teenager. It's like a unicorn.

C: Note Isaac's in-and-out accent. He's real-life Brit.

They’re just sitting there, watching him get a gun stuck in his face, lol.

C: Well, in their defense, the Argents are pretty trigger-happy. You have missed the previous seasons of them unloading clips as fast as they can. Or crossbows.

omg, heartfelt piano

Isaac always looks like he’s juuuuust, you know, thinking about it.

C: And he hasn't even started his scarf phase yet!

Good lord, is that a kunai?

C: Uh, no. We don't get into your Japanese stuff until Season 3b.

Okay, well that knife she just had is like straight out of Naruto.

C: What knife?

Did Lydia (or someone) not just poke herself to make herself bleed?

C: Cheezits… how far ahead of me are you?

Hold on. “Ripping of warm bodies.”

C: I'm there, too. Did I miss Lydia?

I think so. Lemme run it back a little

C: No… you're okay. SCARF SIGHTING!

OMG greenscreen running.

C: This superhero montage music slays me EVERY time.

K just said that from the kitchen! “Is that superhero music?”

C: Note: ER nurse now apparently in morgue. Examining bodies.

*fnikt*

Awww :(

If I had claws, I wouldn’t be able to resist scraping them on things, either.

C: Because it makes sense to keep the office supplies, like melty things like glue and tape -- IN THE BOILER ROOM.

How big is this boiler room?

C: Pretty big because next season it will double as a substation.

lol

hungry like the woooolf

Is that a scarf or a massive cowlneck?

C: Scarf. He has a scarf thing.

Savior lighting!

C: If you were trapped in a boiler room with three growling things all night, would you take his hand or scream your head off?

There has to be a pipe wrench in the boiler room. I’d swing for the fences and run the hell away.

Looks like a street in Sunnydale.

Cyndy: I think that's intentional This place is pretty much Hellmouth.

hee, the music.

As you know, when we used to come down all the time...

C: This moment pretty much sets up the whole season: Stiles gets all the action. Scott gets the side-eye.

What, they couldn’t find a cardigan that went all the way down for Allison?

No, it totally is funny.

C: so up til around here, this is pretty much how I went about losing my virginity.

Where did you find a wine cellar that stocked?

C: Well, it was more college party in the kitchen followed by dorm room. But then no one hauled me out a window.

And I hope you wore shoes, because college is nothing but unidentifiable puddles and ew.

“I don’t like this idea. Let me talk myself into it.”

He has pretty hands.

C: Which one? There is a whole tumblr tag devoted to Dylan O'Brien's (Stiles') hands.

C: This is crazy, back-from-the-dead Uncle Peter.

So are they all born in litters, so everyone is the same age in a generation?

C: Derek is some indeterminable age. We know Peter is a few years older than himm, but close enough they could be brothers. The rest are all turned werewolves.

Everyone over 30 gets a henley!

C: Nah… they put him in V-necks, too. V-necks are the shirt of choice.

Oh good. I like a good v-neck.

Duh, when’s the next moon. Can’t they feel it in their boneses or something?

C: I would imagine it's like knowing about when you're going to get your period.

Yeah, but someone already keeps a calendar for you. Like the whole earth.

The slo-mo!

His shoes are so white!

C: There is a lot of unnecessary slo-mo. Also, don't get me started. I've been known to rage about the ridiculously unrealistic non-use of the lacrosse sticks.

C: Danny is our token gay and only PoC who survives very long besides Deaton. Well, you can count Scott, I suppose.

Hopefully there’s lots of Deaton. I still want to rub his shiny bald head. With my hands. Mostly.

C: OOH! I forgot about this little bit of foreshadowing. I think they must have paid a lot for these tubs.

Mostly dead.

I forgot he was a vet. I was all “What hospital has opera-length rubber gloves? And why?”

C: Is this the first shirt off this episode? Holy hell, this is a late one.

Such lashes!

C: Whose lashes?

Isaac’s wet, I-look-like-a-painted-porcelain-doll lashes. I look way more blue when I’m cold.

C: These ice cubes melt AWFULLY fast, don't they?

No chattering teeth or anything.

C: Erica is one of the missing werewolves.

Is this kid even old enough to reference Thunderdome?

C: On the show? He's 16. In RL, he's 22? I think. Most of them are late 20s.

Ha, I love how they sleep like puppies. All boneless.

Mad Max beyond Thunderdome came out in 1985.

C: Yeah. The majority of this cast wasn't even born.

So is this bank like Wolfram and Hart with the werewolves owning it? (door logo)

C: No. The werewolves don't own shit.

C: See? V-necks!

The Voltron Alpha thing is pretty funny.

C: Miss Morrell is another Deaton. Only her day job is school psychologist.

Allison’s like the good girl on telenovelas--pale make-up, mousy hair, drab clothes. Awful bedroom.

C: Yep, there's Erica. Deader than a shitbug.

C: Note: in the spec book, actually. YEP! SPEC BOOK! One thing they get right.

Ooh, there we go. Climb that. All werewolves are good at parkour.

C: There is TONS of parkour shit in here. Lots of unnecessary flips,.

Awesome.

Is it just me or does Derek look a little like Stiffler?

C: Stiffler????? OMG, you can't be serious.

AHAHAHAHAAH! No, not really. (also, ripping and tearing on the phone: awesome.)

C: That would be mountain ash. Werewolves can't cross it. Or touch it.

Cyndy: Okay, so you already obviously know this is NOT the Michael J. Fox version. ;)

yiss

C: Now, this is Isaac (werewolf) and a woman we don't know. Isaac got to become a werewolf because his abusive gravedigger father used to lock him in a freezer in the basement. So Derek rescued him.

C: Now chasing them are the Alpha Pack: a pack made up of all alpha wolves.

That sounds like a bad time.

C: And motorcycles are like a big thing this season, I'm now noticing.

Visuals are great.

C: Yes. Just… don't expect a lot of the CGI.

Not a huge fan of lazy CGI anyway.

C: Now these two are twins. Also, shirtlessness is a BIG THING on this show. You're welcome.

Also waxing.

C: Yeah. We've been trying to figure out for three seasons why their faces are hairy but their chests are bare.

It’s like certain vampires. No hair below the chin.

C: Okay, now this is Scott. And Stiles in the plaid.

Hee. (K says. “Just like in the movie. That was his name in the movie.) We’re ignoring him now.

Slow motion and piaaaannnooo.

My god, it’s coming right for them!

C: This is Scott's mom. As far as we know, she is the ONLY medical professional who actually works in this hospital.

Oh, okay. I was like “What, the deer? This show is nuts.”

C: Scott is also pretty much dumb as a post.

C: Okay, so this is Allison and her dad. They come from a family of werewolf unters. And Allison sort of went psycho and tried to kill half this pack after her mother committed suicicde anafter she was bitten.

C: Oh, and her grandfather was trying to kill everyone. And her aunt burned down Derek's house with his whole family in it before the series started.

I hate her bedroom.

C: Allison's? Or Lydia's? Lydia is the redhead.

Allison’s.

C: Missing persons flyers for two more werewolves. They sort of ran off becuase they decided Derek sucked as an Alpha.

K says “The twins’ motorcycles.”

AHAHAHA! The slo-mo.

C: So Scott's mom knows about the whole werewolf thing.

C: This is Stiles' dad. He is full of win.

C: So Scott and Allison used to date until he was involved in the whole sitch where her mother offed herself. Derek sort of bit her mom because her mom was trying to kill Scott.

C: New teacher. They go through a lot of them at this school.

Naturally.

C: Also, product placement is a BIG DEAL.

Wicked side-eye. Dun dun dunnnnn.

C: This is Kali. She needs a pedicure.

Heee.

OMG, passing notes. (also, I note, not cursive.)

C: Stiles has been in love with Lydia since like third grade in canon. Obviously, the fandom pretty much ignores this.

All I can think is the crewmember slapping a blood-soaked bird into the window. “No, I don’t like the pattern. Do it again.”

C: BELLMAN AND BLACK!!!! BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

:D

Hahaha! (nails thru the surgical gloves.)

Awww, puppy :(

GO for the groin!

C: OMG! I love how you have watched for like 10 minutes and already realize Scott is a puppy.

C: THIS thing of beauty is Derek.

I’m into it.

C: This is the burned-out shell of Derek's former family home.

That crazy mom burned down, right?

C: Crazy Aunt Kate. Allison's aunt. Her father's sister.

C: Now… there is a big hole in the floor because Derek's uncle Peter brought himself back from the dead through there.

Of course.

C: This is Deaton: HOTTER THAN THE SUN. He's the vet, but also some sort of magician who never gives anyone a straight answer.

Doesn’t it mean “to tap”?

C: Look. Wikipedia is apparently blocked by the NetNanny in the writers' room.

WTF.

C: Yeah, that jossed a lot of fic. No one thought "blow torch" for making a tattoo stick to a werewolf.

“If you heat it, all the crap that sank in rises to the surface! DUH.”

Also, the switch-claws are killing me. *fnickt*

I love how we’re not supposed to know what she’s going to do with the broomstick unless she spins it around a little.

C: I blame The Matrix for that shit.

You deal with an Alpha pack by bringing in a lot of magical vag, right? Settles them right down.

What’s this thingol now?