#capfalcon

“Okay, you need to be my prison buddy.”

“I… already am?”

“No, no, I mean, you need to be prison pal — best pal, oh my god they were roommates kind of pals, yeah?” Joaquin winks all exaggerated and Sam is just,,, so confused.

“They were roommates…what? I can’t make them put me in your cell, we’re lucky we even got neighbouring cells.”

“Sam, you are not listening to me. I don’t know if you’ve realised yet but I am a short Mexican twink with boyish good looks and a very nice butt; I’m gonna get my ass resized real soon if I don’t have someone being my ‘caretaker’.”

Sam is just unable to compute what he just heard out of his dear friends mouth and just decides, adult life is already so goddamn weird.

“Are you asking to be my prison bitch, Torres?”

“Yes.”

“Without asking me to dinner first?”

“I will buy you all the dinners when we get out but for now I’d like to leave this place with as little trauma as possible, thank you,”

“How am I supposed to uh… you know, make it clear you’re my…?

“I don’t know, put some food on my pillow, I heard that stuff works. If I eat it it’s like a contract?”

“That’s so weird. Prisons are creepy, man.”

“Yeah, the guy I share a cell with is only here cause he assaulted the guy who couldn’t be convicted of touching his kid. The justice system sucks, Sam.”

“Agreed. Let’s work on that too when we get out of here, okay?”

“Captain, yes, Captain!”

‘Accurate’ social media edits: oh captains our captains edition

Steve isn’t good at posting and left after being called daddy on a workout post too many times, but he’s always proud of his boyfriend 

i have very few im afraid :(( because this is largely a background ship for me, but hopefully these couple help!!

Making Amends: @betheflame

Steve and Sam have been divorced for a few years.

Shame they can't seem to stop fucking whenever they're around each other.

interview with the falcon (and friend): @softsams

in the not so distant future, rhodey becomes the new leader of the avengers, and sam becomes captain america. someone at the offices of gq is smart enough to interview them.

Affinity: @astolat 

The first week after Steve walked out of SHIELD, he went clubbing.

Not The Destination: @starsandatoms 

Before they leave New York, Tony Stark (Tony Stark, Jesus, Sam's not over it, never ever over it) hands him an AmEx Black and says, "Don't let Cap spend it all on egg creams and quarters for the jukebox."

"That is exactly what I'm gonna do," Sam says. "Egg creams and jukeboxes, nonstop. That's how we roll."

Baby, we’re already saved: @/lanyon

Sam has no idea how to ask Captain America if he’s in love with his sidekick.

I was tagged by @capfalcon - thanks ^-^

This is from the expansion of the short fic I posted where Arthur has epilepsy that is very quickly turning into a much longer fic because I have no self-control agsjdkd

“That’s good.” Eames raised an eyebrow, taking a sip of his own drink. “At this rate, you’ll be a full bloody architect by the end of the job with how much you’re in charge of training her.”

“I basically already am by this point.” Arthur seemed to relax somewhat with the change in topic, a bit of the tense discomfort leaving his posture. He sighed. “She's getting the hang of it though, so I'm mostly just back to doing research outside of answering a few questions here and there."