#calsci

I miss the feeling of being a part of this school and it has been three years since I graduated from this institution. Those four years were full of happiness, tears, excitement, love and lots of memories were made. I’ll see you on Wednesday and I hope that I’ll have that nostalgic feeling, CalSci! 

If we don't change, we don't grow. As humans, we are always changing, always growing, always looking for that one place to call home. We are in a constant battle to find ourselves and to have inner peace and contentment. We can only move on with our lives if we have the will to grow because at the end of the day, everything in this world is bound to change thus... WALANG FOREVER!!!

Oh God, this is embarrassing.

I'm sorry for ruining the mood of my *overly dramatic* introduction but I'm in the mood to use that phrase as tonight's mantra whilst writing. So here it goes. I present to you, my last letter as an official Kalsayenyo.

Over the last four years of my life, I have been through hell and back. To think that a 12 year old girl with rebonded hair and an obsession over boybands could withstand Special Math in 7th Grade is very unlikely. It's better to assume that the girl I was talking about dropped out of school, transferred to another one that actually promotes 8-hours of sleep, and had a peaceful life as a normal student in a normal school.

But that is not the case.

Four years later, she managed to keep her cool and carry on... and somehow that was everything. I must say, it wasn't easy. It was like carrying the weight of the world upon your shoulders (#OhNoPrecalculus #OhNoChemistry #OhNoProving #OhNoElectronics and the list goes on) but staying at Calsci was one of the best decisions of my life. I could've moved on and started my 8th grade at a different school but no. I decided to stay and did my best. I failed, a lot of times actually, but is failure enough to say goodbye?

Absolutely not.

Now let's go back on June 4, 2012 aka the start of Chapter 7 in my book. The ride was hella crazy and tough but if given the chance, I'd do it again— given the chance to ride the Calsci Express once more in my life, I'd do it again.

I'd do it over and over (and over) again.

I know for fact that I'm far better than I was before (same goes to everyone) and that my current self is much happier and contented with her life and this is all thanks to the Mighty One above. I like to think that everything happens for a reason and that me getting accepted in Calsci also had one— and boy, Calsci IS the reason why I'm so alive (and sleepless) at the very moment!

Truth be told, I might've gave up on myself and I might've gotten tired along the way. Like I said, it wasn't a walk in the park, it wasn't walking down the yellow brick road towards the Emerald City— just no. If anything, it was like falling down the rabbit hole to Underland (or Wonderland, if we're being hella optimistic), almost getting beheaded by the red queen, and slaying the Jabberwocky with the Vorpal Sword.

But hey, Alice (Alex; pun intended) was able to kill that hideous monster and return back to England safe and sound.

The same goes to us; life is never easy. There will Jabberwockies along the way but we must have the strength to carry on. With or without the Vorpal Sword, we should carry on. We should always keep the faith and stay strong amidst the storm.

And that is the essence of being a Kalsayenyo, my friend. It's being the Alice in a place called Wonderland where nothing makes sense but we just have to keep going and growing. Be the Alice.

Always be the Alice.

I've gained scars as a proof of my story, and I'd be glad to show it. They're not pretty but it's worth it; every step I took was worth it. Because what if I decided to just give up? What if I decided to let go of the great things in life? Would I still have these scars? Would I still be the same person as I am now?

I highly doubt it.

Our story is not yet done. We may have finished writing Chapter 10 but we still have a long way to go. I know that we are capable of becoming the person we want to be. I know that we are capable of happiness.

Thank you for four years of heaven and hell. I cried a lot of times, fallen a thousand times, and called myself unworthy of being part of your family. But every pain was worth it. I wouldn't be the same person I am now without your help and guidance. I love and appreciate you with all my heart.

Thank you.

My story is much like yours. I know that by the grace of God, you'll make it. You'll slay the Jabberwocky and be the Alice in your own story. Just carry on with life. It's tough and it will be hell but at the end of the day, everything happens for a reason.