#bratpcker

+ FRIENDS    4/??           ↳ samuel shane emerson   •   16   •   fashion victim + awesome monster basher.

‘     i  might  have  poisoned  one  of  these.     GOOD  LUCK  picking.   ‘  

           his  mind  is  like  a  vice,  an  idea  is  caught,  ensnared.  he  can’t  let  it  go,  and  he’s  TIRED  of  waiting.  it  feels  like  a  second  passes  like  an  eternity,  and  really,  they’re  more  than  ready.  it  was  okay  to  be  afraid,  Bill  was  TERRIFIED,  but  there  was  nothing  he  wouldn’t  do  --  wouldn’t  risk  for  his  brother.  “  I  --  I’m  not  suhs-s-sitting  around  here  ahnn--anymore,  Sam.  wuh--ww-we’re  ready,  we  can  do  this.  ”

          ❛  I don’t understand, how could such people exist?  ❜  Too young, too naive, too unaware of the dangers that lurked within the world. Penelope would never understand, never truly come to terms, with what some people ( and the monsters as well ) were capable of. This was more so of the normal, mundane people of the earth, for she knew what many monsters could do and would do. Sorrow would pool to her gaze, the shock of learning that vampires did plague the world with callous hands and cruel lips.  ❛  I always believed that the world was kinder, more at peace, but I guess I was wrong ...  ❜

‘  i think it gives it something a little extra -- don’t you think ?  ’

he’s right.  because his head tells him that his father’s pride in spencer is fair —— that spencer deserves it, because he’s a good player and a good person.  but his heart says something entirely different,  something it’s been aching for since the moment jordan was born.  he has always been so desperate for his father to be proud of him,  to do whatever he could to show his father that he DESERVED it.  it’s why he was interested in football at all  ——  because his father played.  and his father was GOOD at it,  so jordan knew he had to be too.  though, it always felt like something was missing,  that jordan couldn’t ever reach the level billy baker expected him to be.  he used to think it was impossible until spencer walked into their life —— and now,  he sees that it’s not.  he also sees that maybe he won’t ever be enough.  

❝  and what if they’re both starting to tell me the same thing? ❞  that maybe football isn’t the route he wants to take with his life.  at least,  every time they lose a game, that’s what he starts to believe.  it’s been so long since he has felt the power and the thrill that football brings that he’s starting to wonder  (  does he have to stick with it if he’s only doing this for his father,  has he entirely lost the interest for himself? ) ❝  not easy to give up on something you’ve spent your whole life trying to do.  ❞

“ i have an infinite tenderness for you. i always will. my whole life. ”