#beginner2.0

I did it again. I stopped doing sth for me. In January i relly wanted a freh new start and bam, after 1 week of working out every day i got sick with the flu, but with a very heavy kind of. I was sick for like.... 10 day and then again at the start of February for 8 days. And the coughing didn’t stop since... Okay, there may be some context between coughing and smoking 10 - 20 cigarettes a day ;)

So, last week i bought the PIIT28 stuff from Cassey from Bliglates. And I couldn’t get myself to start with it. Excuses everyday. Yesterday I had a bad night with feeling fat and ugly and argh. And then i realized why I didn’t start the PIIT28. It’s not a lack of time. It’s not a lack of space in my tiny apartment. It’s simply one thing: Fear. Fear of not making it through one of the 4 repeats. Of being sore for like 6 days and not being able to do more sport. And the fear of seeing how low I got. How little muscle there can be in a human body after doing almost nothing for 2 years (I bet it’s under 30 times).

And so I tricked myself out: I’m gonna compelte the beginners 2.0 calender from Cassey first and then I can try the PIIT28. One step after another. No crazy “beginenrs calender and runnign 1 hour every day and ....”. Just this simple little thing.

And on the side of eating? Uhm. I just decided no Pizza for me in the whole of April. And today is already April the 9th and I have not eaten any Pizza since the 30th of March. It sounds so stupid and so litte compared what all the fitness goddesses do. But I just listened to Cassey and she said it right. Everyone is at there own journey. And it won’t help to compare these. I’m right now at Chapter 1, page 1 (the prologue were the last 10 days...). And I won’t compare myself to someone who is in chapter 372 or sth like this.