that scene where john's talking to lemar's family, and lemar's mom holds him like he's her son too. that breaks me so much.
she says that lemar talked about him often. that lemar was proud of him when he became captain america. that she was too. how far back did the two of them go? they served in the military together, did they go to school together? were they on the football team together, in detention together, even further back, did they grow up together? if john's home was devoid of love, did he use doing his homework with lemar as an excuse to go to his house instead of going home? did his mom make sure john was fed, shake her head with fond disapproval as she watched john and lemar take turns on lemar's new ps1, did she let him sleep over if he claimed it was too dark for him to go back home, even if it was a bright summer afternoon? was lemar the best man at john and olivia's wedding? was his mom invited too? when she looks at him, does she see captain america, does she see a murderer, or does she just see her son's best friend, the playful blond he brought home from school and bragged about for the rest of his life, the boy she personally watched grow up?
in that scene, when john says "i'm sorry", you can tell he doesn't mean "i'm sorry for your loss", but rather "i'm sorry i failed you both"
