#asexual deceit

Roman: Are you fucking with me?

Janus: No, I’m asexual. Why would I want to fuck with anyone?

“What? I like the movies experience but I don’t like paying for that, better have someone who does that for me.”

He’d go on those dates and once he’s done he says “Excuse me, I need to go the toilet” and never comes back.

He matches with Remus, who calls him for their first date at a theater play.

“My brother is performing there” he says “And he managed to get me 2 tickets for free”

Deceit accepts and they meet at a cafe right next to the theater. He enjoys Remus’s wild personality and actually have a fun time with him, at least it’s a fun date.

They talk for some time, get to know more about each other… And then, out of sudden, Remus says “You’re asexual, right?”

Deceit gets surprised and says “Yes, how did you know?”

Remus says he noticed since the beginning for stereotypical and yet funny reasons (things like “all aces wants to have a dragon” after Deceit talks a lot about his passion for dragon stories, nothing actually mean) which makes Deceit chuckle a bit while feeling stupid for confirming it so easily.

“And also I noticed the black ring in the right middle finger!” he points to Deceit’s ring that looks like a black snake curling up on his finger. At least one actual good reason. He knew about the black ring thing because his brother’s boyfriend, Virgil, is also ace.

“Why did you asked me on a date then? I’m not getting into anything with you so why did you give it a shot?”

Remus shrugs and says “No one likes to go to theater plays and even less likes to watch anything with me but you didn’t seem to care about it so I just didn’t want to be alone and actually watch my brother’s play with someone”

Deceit feels sad for the rat man so he goes to the play and makes sure to stay with him till the end of the day. He meets Roman and his boyfriend, goes out to eat a pizza with them after the play and tells him he had a great time.

They become friends and maybe, why not, end up in Queerplatonic Relationship?

Everyone is happy in the end

Everyone:

Remus:

Everyone: -unless..?

Remus: No, that's it.

Despite being aroace Deceit actually says "I love you" pretty often. It's endearing

Whenever Patton hears it though, he SHUTS. IT. DOWN.

"No you don't stop saying you love him"

Virgil is always there to back up Patton, of course

It makes Deceit anxious and he stops saying it as often which kind of brings everyone else down

- What happens when Logan and Deceit decide to compete in the weirdest of ‘science’ experiments without telling anyone, and it throws Roman for a loop. Aka: The day Roman realises that his friends will never stop surprising him. Ships: Loceit, Platonic Roman at everyone Warnings: swearing, are hickeys a warning?, bad plot I’m new to this, but i got the idea from a friend who asked if asexuals leave hickeys on their partner. I wouldn’t know, I’ve never even dated. I am asexual though. So i answered with ‘I guess for science?’ and the memory only came back at 1am today and wouldn’t let me sleep So I hope you enjoy The ending sucks, I know First and third person difference? Who’s she? Never heard of her ----------------------- This wasn’t what Roman thought his morning would go. 

Being the trait of romance, he was a little jealous that Logic and Deceit both had boyfriends. He wasn’t jealous of their boyfriends; just that they were with each other while he was on his lonesome. He’s voiced this a few times during the start of their relationship until Deceit threatened to sic his brother on him. Now he quietly laments on his loneliness while openly supporting the two in their adorable, very gay relationship.

But his undying love for romance can only go so far before he’s at a loss.

“Was... Was that a hickey on his neck?” With a silent nod, he helps Virgil put his mug down before he spills the bitter coffee onto his lap as his eyes remain trained on the stairs where their dear friend had retreated to find something to read during breakfast. 

It’s been nearly two whole years since the two started dating. There was four months of hiding said relationship, another eight for the two to be happily open about all their cute couple things, and then almost an entire year of moment-long kisses and the occasional warmth-seeking snake needing affection.

Hickeys though... That’s a new one. He would have thought that he was imagining it, but Virgil had seen it as well. If Virgil saw it, then that dark bruise just above the nerd’s shirt collar exists. 

And that baffled Roman for some reason.

“Dude, stop being a disaster gay and eat your food before Patton scolds you for wasting it.” He turns to their resident emo with a face of pure shock, motioning towards the stairs.

“But... But when will I ever see such a sight again!?”

“The way you talk about the two makes it sound like your gay for them. Just, don’t be weird about it...” 

With a huff, the Prince returns to his meal just as Logan returns with a very worn copy of ‘Treasure Island’ that he had given the nerd for Christmas many moons ago. It warmed his heart that his friend still read it as it had taken him weeks to try and find a book that wasn’t full of facts that Logan would remember after the first read. He’d reminisce more, but that darkened patch of skin is distracting him. 

‘It’s just a damned hickey’ he told himself. He shook his thoughts away and greeted their beloved father figure, who returned it with a happy smile and a wave before grabbing a plate for himself. 

“Are Deceit and Remus not joining us this morning, Lo?” He perks up at the sound of his nickname, thinking for a moment as he finishes his bite of the pancakes he made for everyone this morning.

“They’ll be late today as Remus wished to show Deceit something. Apparently, it just couldn’t wait until after breakfast.” With a nod, Patton starts making conversation with Virgil and we let Logan go back to his book. I find myself looking at that hickey after every few bites, glad that Logan is busy reading his book because this is probably weird.

He and Patton finish eating at the same time, marking his book before following Patton to the sink to drop off the dishes. “Ah, one second.” I nearly drop my fork as he reaches up and fixes Logan’s collar, hiding the hickey after giving it a soft pat with the tips of his fingers. “Maybe ask De to make those a little lower next time.”

Not a moment passes before Virgil chokes on air, slapping a hand over his mouth to try and hide his laughter. I try to hide my own laughter, just not as well as the nerd is already red at the tips of his ears. “I’ll uh... t-tell him, Patton.”

“Who are you telling what to?” There’s the snake, his voice slinking into the room as he walks in from behind Virgil and I. Another small chuckle escapes as I turn towards him, only for it to be caught in my throat at the sight of him. There’s confusion, excitement, my passion for romance growing within me; but there’s mostly just pure amusement.

The human side of his neck is massively discoloured. Blotches of black and blue are spread across it, some of them ducking behind his collar to hide from others eyes. I register that he’s giving me a look of bemusement; but holy moly, give me mercy- Logan did that. 

“Y-You said that you were going to wear a scarf!”

“I changed my mind. I’m starting to like the colour blue on my skin.”

I think I just choked.

“Fuck- Sorry Pat- you’re both so gay! Get a room!” 

“We each have a room already, Virgil-”

“It’s an idiom, dear.”  

I think I’m going to die from these two. They’re both too cute for it to be legal in my presence, yet they’re also both insufferable in their own ways. Deceit with the light flirting and pet name, Logan dashing all my thoughts about him after realising that he did that to Deceit’s neck. Probably his chest too. Fuck, now that image is in my head and I’m dying twice as fast. 

“What’s with the look, Virgil? Never seen a hickey before?”

“We both know that you have more then just a hickey on you, and no. I just haven’t seen one on either one of you before. You said that you were ace!” 

I manage to get rid of the clog up of air from my throat just as they give each other a look of amusement. I’d say something, but I’d probably die again and I don’t want Remus finding me passed out from an overdose of second-hand adorable gays. 

“I am ace. You’re as bad as Remus right now... We were simply testing each other.”

“With your mouths on each others necks!?” I didn’t mean to yell that as loudly as I did. I can see Remus peeking over the stairs railing, smiling widely as if he knows something I don’t. Bastard rat man of a twin...

“Go on dearest. They won’t believe me if I tell them.”

Seeing Logan red as my sash and attempting to collect his thoughts will be forever locked inside my memories. It’s funny as hell and I’m already thinking of ways to try and see it again. “Deceit brought up the idea, at a ridiculous time of the night I may add, to test and see who could make a hickey the fastest between the two of us.”

“I won, as you can see. He kept trying to beat my time.”

“I was one point one-fourth of a second off!”

“He’s such a sore loser~”

I push my chair back and take a deep breath before standing. All the calmness said breath gave me dissipates into a mist of disappointment as Remus cackles quietly by the stairs. “And I thought you two were being romantic. But you’re both just massive nerds!”

“DE HAS A HICKEY BY HIS LEFT SNITTIE!”

Nope. I am done. Grabbing my plate, I quickly sink down into my room and quickly lock the door from the inside. 

Logan had a hickey. Deceit had an army of hickeys. Remus knows where a hickey is on a part of Deceit’s body that should have been hidden from view. Remus has made the term ‘snittie’ now enter my brain like the Intrusive Thot that he is!

Deceit: But what if you want-

Remus, clapping: CONSENT IS THE MOST IMPORTANT THING IN A RELATIONSHIP!

Deceit: But you’re not brok-

Janus: .....