#articlesonselfhelp

I like staying quiet. Perhaps because I am an overthinker, even if l don’t look like one. And I don’t know if people tend to see everything around them but I observe too much. Or maybe too little.

I believe there is some hypocrisy in us. In our personalities and attitudes, even if we deny it. A lot of times, you’ll find yourself comparing a person who did something unbecoming or inconvenient, to you. You will think that you could have done the same thing in a better way and provided an easier solution. I often find myself doing this. No matter how much I preach about equality and feminism quotes on Pinterest, I still become rude or hypocritical at times. I think to myself – ‘Try better next time. Don’t judge them, it’s just what they could think of.’ The next time, however, I end up iterating the cycle.

My point is, there will always be hypocrisy in you – to some extent. If we were all equal and fair, no one would be equal and fair. Human nature compels you to find flaws in every possible aspect of your life. To be perfectly candid, there is nothing much you can do but simply let it be. Because at times, not everything needs to be positive.

I am surrounded by a lot of people. Like my teachers and peers and family. My schoolmates, for instance, have been around me for several years and I know them quite well. When we were in middle school, I used to have a presumption about almost everyone I knew. I was stubborn that this girl was nosy and that that boy was rude. Later on, there was a long pause and we were not around each other. But, a lot of those presumptions stayed with me; even when I grew older, made new friends and forgot others. When we got back, I was pleasantly surprised. Not just on seeing everyone’s physical appearances but also the moments when I got to interact with them.

I came to the conclusion that I observe too much. Because that one month was quite a reset. All of them had forgotten – or moved on from the fact that – we had had arguments or even significant fights. I spoke to a lot of people for the very first time; even if they had been right there for a decade!

It dawned on me that people can be good and they can change for their own good. It was just me who matured earlier and felt that others would remain the same while I would go on to become an adult. How strangely the mind works!

I now jump onto a new trend. Imperfection is the new perfection. (My friends would definitely call me a hypocrite on this one because I can get fussy about trivial things.) Earlier, communities used to be married to the idea of perfection. The perfect family or the perfect child or the perfect behaviour. Now, we don’t do perfectly. We do imperfectly. (That’s quite a hip thing to say, I must admit.) Why? I’ll just guess, my imperfect answer.

Society took perfection to ungodly heights, in my opinion. Everything had to be in a certain way. It was like that psychology - the more you suppress an emotion or put barriers over things, the more you long for them, and the more inquisitive you become. I am not saying those times were bad, but that nature hung in the air. Opinions weren’t popular, per se. There was definitely some external influence, but I don’t know what changed at that time. I suppose we found flaws in the status quo and disrupted it.

And today, I believe that the reason why imperfection is so powerful is that we want to portray ourselves in the most humane way. It’s like an overly emphasized justification for our mistakes by making those mistakes. Again, if we were all perfect no one would be perfect and again your human nature will do this reverse psychology trick and find flaws and that whole picture in understanding is mind-blowing.

To conclude my very long thoughts, I would say that I would not at all prefer to put lines like - ‘Let’s be positive about everything and hope for the best.’

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