#annie!

Annie: S'mores! Yum!

[Annie pulls out a marshmallow, then realizes she needs both hands to make the sandwich. She whips her eyepatch up and shoves the marshmallow into her empty eye socket then makes the s'more, pulling the marshmallow out to stick it on the stick she's using as a skewer.]

once upon a time, after patrick flopped majorly at tennis, he got a job temping at an accounting firm run by a man named brad. what gives... so did annie! yay for accounting!

except... not exactly. because annie and patrick did not like each other. no no no!

but brad was a little fuckwad, and he always wore camo and smelled like feet, and brad was always mean to annie and patrick... so they bonded. they bonded over how terrible it was brad wore his orange tie with his camo shirt, and about how much it sucked when he was yelling and you could smell the feet radiation.

somewhere along the way, patrick and annie's bonding ended up with them freaking it crazy style in the copy room. what else could you do, when your cubicles were next to each other, right? so they freaked it a whole lot of times! and then they got an apartment together and freaked it some more times!

which led to patrick suggesting that they file their taxes together, and list each other as dependents. annie thought patrick was joking. he was not. even though he said it would be funny.

it was not funny when shelly from the irs showed up to their place.

shelly had glasses. the red and pointy kind. and a big clipboard. patrick was only wearing one sock and his big toe was poking through it. which was not great.

“hi,” annie greeted. “would you like some water? tea? a gun?”

patrick said nothing because he was attempting to hide behind the couch. terribly. shelly made direct eye contact with his knee.

“are you two legally married?” shelly asked.

“define legally,” patrick said.

“define married,” annie added.

shelly waved around her magic sending-you-to-jail pen.

patrick panicked first. “we’re in love,” he blurted.

annie blinked. “yeah. so in love.”

shelly narrowed her eyes. “then prove it.”

unfortunately this meant that they had to stage a very fast vegas wedding with shelly as the witness, flower girl, and ring-bearer. they got her a nice dress but she refused to wear it. shameful!

finally, the elvis allowed them to kiss. "are we in love now, shelly?" patrick asked, before making out with annie sloppy with tongue. shelly was outraged.

"you are felons!"

and so shelly handcuffed them and put them in the back of the irs prius where they freaked it crazy style multiple times while they waited for shelly to come up with an actual reason for why they had been arrested.

"yay!" said patrick. "i am so glad to be married to you! you are great at freaking it!"

and then they freaked it until the prius had its catalytic converter stolen.

Girl who has been rotting in my brain for years. She has been named Annie by @glibble-glonker

i had fun with this

sorry it's so short though

also it's a modern au cause i thought it would be cute

word count: 321

｡･:* sea + kim taehyung | for @kimtaegis ☽༓･*

“희망이 있는 곳엔 반드시 시련이 있네. . .” 

Annie grumbled. She tossed and turned in her bed, but wasn’t able to get any sleep. She looked and saw Garcello asleep nice and soundly.

Havin' some trouble there, kid?

10. Do you have a secret sideblog? ...I used to but I don't use it anymore

I'm gonna assume you meant 20? What is something you’re obsessed with? obsessed (derogatory) with the concept of being misunderstood in a way that has repercussions like anything from being falsely accused for a crime to just telling someone in regular life the truth and having them not believe me lol sorry I can't think of a lighthearted one