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i was busy when angel dropped and couldn't read it until today but HOLY SHIT WAS IT WORTH THE WAIT đđ
THE CLIFFHANGER HELLO?????? I AM DECEASED
also as a someone who's not even romantic, babe, you made a believer out of me đ«Ș got me thinking maybe this exists wow đŁđŁ the fluff? the kisses? i die
absolute masterpiece omg
BABYYYY you got to read it pretty quick, though! i know a lot of us are waiting to read after work and stuff so thank you for reading and enjoying :D the cliffhanger is.... well. LOL i know i know but we will get through this!
and they are just so so cute and honestly? they deserve to be able to have this type of love and partnership after everything they have both been through. i'm just happy they get to be like this nowđ talk about 3tan yoongi getting to show reader just how in trouble they are hahaha that man is WHIPPEDDDDDDD
Also omg THAT ENDING?!? GIRL!!!!
Itâs bot bro for sure like no way đ”âđ« so Iâm thinking either jungkook or namjoon đ€ They were really in lalaland in their own world.
my GODDDD i was so enamored like... they needed to get multiple rooms UGH i couldn't handle all the soft moments :((
i love the friends so damn much. like if i had that friend circle irl i feel like i could conquer anything (and get daily doses of reality checks from dom lmaooo)
BRO SCENE WAS CRAZYYY my heart was dropping to my ass too frđđ like wdym this and that and why'd you say this and that ???
explicit warnings: cursing, thigh riding, cowgirl, oral (m rec), naughty studio time(??), couch sex, rough sex, giving yoongi the business, bold as fuck reader, choking, spanking, penetrative sex, kissing deserves to be here too lol, alexa play no hands by waka flocka, deep throating, hair/head tugging, nipple play, yoongi in that gd tank, yoongi in those gd glasses, teasing, titty fucking hello!!!!, stripping while he watchesâŠ. yeah, missionary, sub!3tanyoongi?????, scratching, multiple orgasms, protected sex, emotional sex, the glasses.. stay on??, good god theyâre so hot iâm blushing
â
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Itâs morning when Jimin gets a call.Â
Shifting in sheets that arenât his, he sleepily blinks once before eyeing the blue light with a squint, wondering who dares wake him up before his natural rise. What time even is it anyway? Itâs gotta be an ungodly hour if his circadian rhythm is disturbed.Â
Still, he grabs his cell from the nightstand, flinching at the movement behind him and inwardly slinging out curses.Â
Because waking him up is one thing.Â
But if anyone disturbs Taehyung heâs gonna give them hellâ
Min Yoongi: Incoming Call
Shit.
Jimin yanks the covers off, rushing out of bed and snapping Tae awake anyway. For what? Donât fucking know, but theyâre ready. Wherever. Whatever. They already stayed up clutching their phones until they physically couldnât keep their eyes open.Â
Because as much as Yoongi assured him nothing would happen, Jimin still couldnât let go of his car keys.
Answering slow, he feels his chest winding and winding, eyes locked with Taehyung while they both wait on edge, ââŠYoongi?â
âYeah.â
Thank the fucking stars.Â
Yoongiâs okay. Heâs on the line. He made it to morning or whatever fucking time it is, and heâs doing exactly what he said he would.
And itâs enough, enough, enough.
Burns zing up the corners of Jiminâs eyes, and he swipes hard as Taehyung moves, likely to hear whatâs happening and even more likely to just be by his side.Â
Jimin is grateful for either one. But he tries to keep composure as he croaks, âYou better have woken me up for a reason.â
The slight hum on the line induces a wobbly smile. âYou slept?â
âFuck you,â Jimin shakily laughs, wiping liquid relief from an eye before Taehyungâs thumb brushes tenderly over the other. His gaze is thankful while continuing, âWe did but not much.â
âSorry.â
âItâs okay.â Sniffling, Jimin walks to Taeâs door, letting him into the hallway first and finally drinking in the sight of his ass in those sweats. Because he can finally function like a normal, smitten loser again. âWeâll come over so we canââ
âNo need.â
âWhat?â Nope. Back to panic mode. And judging from his boyfriendâs posture, Taehyung has backpedaled into that, too. âWhat do you mean no need?â
Thereâs a slight pause on the line, and small noises make their way through the speaker. It sounds like bedsheets, but it also sounds likeâŠÂ
âSheâs still sleeping.â
Oh.
Oh, shit.
A tidal wave of relief crashes into Jiminâs ducts as he hangs his head, palming his face caught in a heavy tide of emotion. When he turns, Taehyung fairs no better, his eyes red and fingers wiping at a perfect, perfect cheek. One of them sniffles, but Jimin canât tell if itâs him or not, because his vision is blurry and his heart is beating, beating, beating again.Â
Whether you know it or not, whatever you did last night may have just changed Yoongiâs entire life.
Because Jimin knows this man through and through. Years of picking up his habits and tells didnât amount to nothing. Itâs how he was able to sense exactly when to intervene, and how he knew exactly what that hauntingly hollow tone in Yoongiâs voice meant when he busted in that day.Â
The tone he hears now? The man that just spoke on the line?Â
That is a Min Yoongi so in love he canât even hide it over the phone.Â
Fuck.Â
Gathering himself, Jimin squeaks out, âI⊠Iâm glad youâŠâ What the fuck does he say? Every thought jams in his throat so hard he has to hand the phone off.
Thankfully, Taehyung perfectly continues his thoughts, voice scratching rocks under a waking river, âWeâre glad youâre both safe.â
âMm.â
âSo whenâs the wedding?â
Jimin huffs through a fresh batch of tears, clearing his face before grinning at Tae very seriously awaiting an answer. Honestly, at this point? Itâs not far-fetched. Jiminâs seeing your future clearer than his present, and maybe he will be a fun uncle sooner than he thinks.
If only Yoongi would just get the fucking talk with your brother over with.Â
But Jimin understands the hesitation. If he were in that same position, thereâs no telling when he would be courageous enough to stand up to the guy. Thereâs a reason heâs quick to command a room, and his lifelong mission to protect his younger sister made him grow up a lot faster than everyone else.Â
Still⊠Yoongi just deserves to be happy. And youâre the very obvious answer to helping with that.Â
As much as he may have wanted some chances of his own, Jimin is grateful you found your way into his best friendâs heart. Not just anyone is invited inside, and even less people can truly be allowed to stay.Â
And youâre probably the only one that has permanent residence.Â
âYou guys should get some sleep.â
Taehyung pouts right on cue, and Jimin canât fight those sleepy, droopy eyes. âYou didnât answer me.â
Cute as fuck! He must be stopped. Taking the phone, Jimin speaks into the line fully recovered, shooting his cheeky partner a teasing glare, âWe will if you get some, too.â
âCanât.â
âWhy not?â
âGot some things to do at the studioââ
âNo!â They reject together, both equally as appalled because what the fuck kinda answer is that?Â
âAfter what happened last night? Are you crazy?â
âWhat happened to spending time with her? Men!âÂ
âHeâs going on a business trip, I canât lose to him.â
âSo what?â Tae asks before they both share an even further confused look. Yoongi may be a lovesick fool but that doesnât give him an excuse to be a dumbass! âYouâre just gonna leave her alone?â
Thereâs a sigh on the line before Jimin plants a hand on his hip. âNot just that. You gotta rest, too, bro. If she doesnât tell you to take it easy or at least get checkedâwhich she willâweâre going over there to annoy you.âÂ
âYou serious?â
âYes, Iâm serious.â Jimin cocks his head and leans closer to the phone. âAt least rest easy for the next couple days. Especially if you have all this time to see each other.â
The timing couldnât be more perfect. Your brother is leaving for his trip and Yoongi caught some unfortunate hits to his ribs. The dude basically has a free pass to spend the whole week with you, and heâs not even taking full advantage of it? Oh, the things Jimin has to say about the thin line of work ethic and relationship effort.Â
âIâll think about it.â
âThink about it for a long time,â Taehyung cuts in before Jimin can pop off, walking away into the living room.Â
Itâs fine. Let him figure out that you arenât a woman he can just leave. Frankly? That would tickle Jimin to no end to see Yoongi folding his plans so fast just to be with you.Â
But he spares him the tirade only because youâre fast asleep right next to him. âThank you for calling, man.â
âSaid I would.â
âI know.âÂ
Because above all else, Jimin is happy to hear that voice. Even if itâs obvious heâs a little banged up from last night, itâs still Yoongi. In one piece. Thatâs all Jimin wanted, and he canât thank you enough,
âDonât overwork yourself, and stay with her as long as you can.â
Thereâs a small laugh on the other end. âI plan on it, Chim.â
And Jimin catches on to why. âIâm holding you to that then.âÂ
â
â
Dawn breaks through open blinds, stretching its orange tint across a clean, spotless table.Â
You donât know what got you up so early. But when you peer into the kitchen, you tell yourself you woke up right on time.Â
Because seeing Yoongi when youâre wide awake is better than any dream youâll ever have.
Not because of his appearance, even though the sight of him sends a pang through your chest. No. Itâs the way heâs quietly prepping a morning meal, using the arm on his better side thatâs not sporting a nasty hit to the ribs, without you even asking.Â
Bits of sunlight dance right out of your eyes.
The effort. The consideration. This man shouldnât be lifting a finger, yet here he is cooking before you even left his bed. Isnât this the same man that got caught up in a fight hours ago? Isnât this the same man you almost walked out on with a frozen heart?Â
Yes. But heâs also the same man that loves you. And you still canât grasp that concept in any of the fingers playing with his tee you borrowed.
âHi,â you whisper, telling him a thousand things.Â
To which he regards before smiling soft, voice travelling over linoleum and circling around your heart, âMorning, doll.â
Damn. You hear it. Yoongiâs sore as hell.Â
But instead of getting into that right away, you silently take residence by his side. Because this moment feels too delicate, and you admire his willingness to take care of you unprompted. You didnât even know youâd eat before going back home.Â
With a hand warming his back, you wait until Yoongiâs done tossing food on the stove to peck his morning-chilled cheek. âThank you for cooking,â you murmur, admiring those beautiful brown eyes. âSleep okay?â
âCus of you,â your lover softly responds, eyeing your lips before gliding back up to your gaze. âYou?â
Ugh. Heâs gotta know those glasses are so unfair. Theyâve gotten you repeatedly before, and theyâre certainly getting you now.Â
But you canât help but deflate at the cuts behind those rims, while knowing there are even more bruises hiding underneath his oversized tee. How is Yoongi cooking right now? How is he even awake? âSame.âÂ
âGood.âÂ
These instant, deep shivers at his deeper morning voice will never, ever go away. But anything you wanna do about them isnât important right now. Right now, you need to make sure Yoongi is either okay, or finds a way to get better.Â
Sliding your hands down the slopes of his chest, you delicately rest one on his ribs. âDoes it still hurt?âÂ
Yikes. That wince is enough. But Yoongi doesnât shy away from your touch, and you appreciate the way he stays honest. âItâs sore. But I should be good.â
âYou gonna get it checked?â
Thereâs a slight upward tilt of his lips. âNot right now.â At least the honesty persists, as much as you donât want him following the typical manly response to hospital visits. âBut I will if you want me to.â
âPlease go,â you gently urge, lest you disturb the soft morning dew before it melts with the sunrise. âFor me?â
Only sizzles from the stove fill the space until Yoongi nods, and his voice is just as low and tender, âIâll go after work.â
Oh. âYouâre working today?â
Just like breakfast, you didnât expect this, either. Frankly, you figured neither of you were gonna even think about work, much less go. Sure, heâs due a hospital visit and you owe some friends immediate explanations for your absence. But other than that, shouldnât Yoongi be resting?Â
Does his craft truly mean that much?Â
Well, shit. You gotta respect his work ethic, thatâs for damn sure. Because you would sequester yourself to your bedroom and have endless dates with your television if you were sporting a good jab or two. This music thing must mean more to Yoongi than you previously thought. And who are you to step on that dream?Â
Suddenly, all thoughts and concerns flee from the kiss on your cheek.Â
âIâll stay if you stay,â he says, turning to move the pan and scrunching his face with a grunt. Fuck.Â
âIâŠâ Shit, you were gonna go back to the house anyway. And from Yoongiâs smartass smirk, you can tell he already knew that. âJust need to check on him, too. And he doesnât have a car right now, so. I should at least give him a ride.âÂ
âFigured.â In a move so domestic your head spins, Yoongi turns your body and gently pats your butt. âNow go sit. Letâs eat and figure this out.âÂ
â
â
As you devour a flawless meal and clean your dishes, you plan out the day. Youâll head home and check on your brother while Yoongi heads to the studio, and then youâll rendezvous with your friends to hang out until heâs done with work. Theyâre already lighting up your phone like no oneâs businessâespecially Yuri.Â
Yoongi flicks the sink off before you both head to his bedroom, and you melt at the way he slowly wraps his arms around your front halfway there, all four of your legs slowing to close the rest of the distance.Â
Whatâs he doing? This is joyfully new, but you have a pretty tight deadline. Warming his forearm and your own cheeks, you chuckle out, âWe have to hustle, old man.âÂ
âYou hustle me all the time,â he accuses into your shoulder blade, kissing its ridge and making you reconsider walking out the door entirely. âLemme have this.âÂ
Your second laugh is more subdued, and youâre right between his bed and desk when you lift both hands to hold him close. âYou have everything I got,â you wisp into his skin, planting your lips once, twice before you feel his arms press further in. âSo this is nothing.âÂ
Seconds and silence slide by, the delicate veil of early morning still hovering around the room. When Yoongi doesnât say anything, you make to turn and face him.Â
But youâre stopped before your heart skips.Â
âI could stay like this all day,â he admits, voice so low it rumbles through your bones. âAnd itâd be perfect.âÂ
âWhat, you donât wanna see my face?â You joke with a giggle. âRude, but thatâs fine.âÂ
Yoongi only buries his nose further, his glasses sliding against your skin peeking from his shirt. âIâm much braver right here, doll.âÂ
Oh.Â
The leap your heart does is more of a dive, plummeting into the seafoam swirling around your feet. All the words you want to respond with jump off right after, leaving you with nothing but the clouds in your eyes.Â
You donât quite know what he means by that. But it feels like those six words hold the weight of a thousand, so you simply let another kiss on his smooth forearm linger. âDo you want me to go with you?âÂ
A puff of laughter warms you right through and, despite his earlier admission, Yoongi does slowly spin you around.Â
And when you follow, you realize youâre much braver when you arenât facing him, too.Â
âItâs not that, babe,â he says through a dashing curve. âBut the offer was cute.âÂ
âI take it back then.âÂ
âDamn!âÂ
Both of your laughs whoosh out and collide, sweeping as Yoongi pinches your side and you flinch towards the bed. âYou fuckerâ!â
Before you know it, your back hits a comforter before a weight presses your stomach, emotions clashing as youâre elated and shy and immediately concerned for your boyfriendâs side. âBaby, be carefulââ
Lips capture yours, sucking up your warning before a hand slides under your head. Sighing, you arch into his chest, feeling the weight of his chains slip across your breasts.Â
Euphoria isnât an adequate enough word to describe how you feel. Where there used to be flutters in your ribcage now reside strong, powerful wing beats, gusts of want and desire lifting you off the ground and launching you into clear skies. Starlight of every color exists within each kiss you share, and your fingers feebly grab his tee to keep you from falling back down to earth.Â
âIf we donât go now,â Yoongi rasps before sliding his mouth against yours, âWeâre never going anywhere again.âÂ
âI know,â you whisper, willingly letting him kiss you once more, âIs that a promise?âÂ
âFuck, I wish.âÂ
You do, too. But you know youâre running out of time for what you need to do. And werenât you just saying you had to respect his aspirations? Shit, you really do need to snap out of it. âCome on,â you order with a pat to his chest. âWe have all week to do this. We got time.âÂ
Turns out, youâre still amongst the heavens. The way Yoongiâs looking at you? This is the closest youâll ever get to being held by an angel.Â
Did he get more handsome overnight? Or is it the light in his eyes sustained since his confession in the kitchen? You donât quite know, and you may never pinpoint why, but the tug he has on your heart spans space and time.Â
And youâll run through both forever to keep meeting him again and again.Â
Burns prick your eyes, but he mercifully stands before he can catch any evidence of your yearning.Â
Just like that, the two of you bounce back to getting ready, with him sliding notebooks and headphones in a backpack while you change into your own clothes. As you sling your bag over a shoulder, he reaches for the closest hoodie, and you wordlessly make your way to the front door.Â
You really do hope he gets looked at today. But just like the calm after a storm, you want to encourage him gently rather than shove him out. At least he seems receptive to your gentle suggestions.
But after you ask one more time and he simply nods, you lower your eyes to his kicks. âSorry if Iâm nagging. Iâd just worry less if you went right away, thatâs all.â
âYou arenât nagging, babe.â Your freshly bloomed lover reaches out to hold your wrist, smoothing a rough thumb over your skin. Fucking hell, you canât help but frown at the gashes and cuts marring his knuckles. âIâll go as soon as I can.â
Not just his hands, but his face. His ribs. And maybe other places you havenât even seen yet.Â
You donât wanna leave his side.Â
But you have to head out before your brother leaves. Things need to get patched up before he flies out into more stress, and you owe him an apology for walking out when he was still aching. Based on Yoongiâs physical state? Your brother could be hiding some big wounds and you didnât even wanna talk to him.Â
However. Was last night necessary? Absolutely. You cannot entertain the possible outcomes had you not tried hard enough to get through Yoongiâs door. His eyes were so dulled, his hands felt so cold. What would have happened if you didnât force yourself inside?Â
Why was that guitar smashed to pieces?Â
This is also why you refuse to leave. So many questions, so many things you still donât know. Like what all happened when you were separated? And how in the hell is this man in love with you?
âI donât wanna go,â you confess, instantly encased in his arms and warmth. âIâd much rather keep kissing you.âÂ
âTrue,â he says with a resigned huff, shifting his glasses with an adorable nose scrunch. If only he didnât have so many little red lines of conflict on his face. âBut we both have stuff to take care of, so letâs get all that done first.â
âUgh, fine.â Your groan is more teasing than serious, and Yoongiâs laugh is nothing but understanding.Â
Damn. You still feel it. You really donât wanna go. Be it the rawness of last night still on your skin, or the confessions still on your tongues, you just wanna stay by his side. âSorry,â you breathe out, lacing your fingers to pepper love along his strong, reddened ridges. âIâm serious. I donât wanna leave you right now.â
Walking out of Yoongiâs door just doesnât feel right. Even if heâs right there and will be following you out. Is this feeling normal? Are you supposed to feel this tightly woven to someone? Because the stitching between your hearts has only gotten stronger in the tempest of last night, as if you bonded together just to hold on for dear life.Â
Maybe thatâs exactly what happened. And itâs exactly why you can barely take one step out of his place.Â
âThen donât.â
Not one second passes before your chin is held, and lips slide so tenderly across yours that they may as well melt into your touch. Your reaction is quickly swooped into his mouth, and everything falls away as you let him seize your every thought. Lightning from last night zips out of your limbs, your toes, your fingers clasping his loose tee.Â
You might just cry where you stand.
How have his kisses gotten even better? How have you never felt this way even though youâve done this far more times than you were ever supposed to? It should be impossible, and yet, this man finds even more ways to astound you.Â
Yoongi slips a hand over your cheek, giving one more beautiful push of his lips as he confesses, âI donât wanna leave you, either.âÂ
And your breath stutters onto his features. âYou, too?â
Slow, he kisses your cheek, the clear rim of his specs skimming your nose. When he draws back, you look right into his eyes, wondering why heâs watching your mouth instead.Â
âMe, too.â Yoongi kisses your other side with a quiet peck. âFuck, me, too.âÂ
You fucking hate what you have to do, but you donât have a choice.Â
With one last lingering kiss, you both gather enough courage to set out and do what you must.Â
â
â
Your house is already a flurry of activity as you enter to see your brother in the kitchen, packing his leather duffle thatâs a constant companion on his trips.Â
Of course. The memory of him purchasing the lavish accessory pops into your head every time you watch him scurry around, dimples ever present on his proud cheeks. Itâs almost enough to make you smile yet again.Â
But you canât when the same face is currently scratched to hell. Just like Yoongiâs, if not worse.Â
Fuck, is he really gonna travel looking like that?Â
âHey,â he rasps out, still fighting off slumber. âYouâre back earlier than I thought.âÂ
âWanted to check on you before we left.â Fuck, your voice sounds like itâs being forced through a clogged pipe. Loosen the hell up! âAnd dude. Put some bandaids on, yeah?âÂ
âYeah, just give me a sec. Making sure I have everything before my ride gets here.âÂ
âHuh?â He got a ride? Youâre here now so you can take him to the airport. âYou sure you donât need me to drive you?âÂ
âYeah, itâs all good. I didnât know you were coming back.âÂ
Shit. His body seems just as angular as it did last night. Which, quite frankly, could still be from what went down in the lot.Â
Because even though you see both men banged up, you suddenly realize you donât actually know what all transpired.Â
After all, there wasnât much talk of it after you walked into the tempest of Yoongiâs living room.
Of course, you arenât gonna bring it up just this second. There are other things to ask about and make sure of first. âWallet? Phone? Passport?âÂ
âYup, yup, uhh.. Yup.âÂ
Zippers sling in the quiet morning air as you continue, âAnd youâre coming back on Friday, right?â
âOh.. Nah.â When you start crossing the kitchen, your brother hauls his leather bag over his better shoulder. Honestly, no one would be able to tell the other oneâs bruised with his suit on. That thing damn well covers everything except the cuts on his face and hands. âSaturday.âÂ
You pause in your journey to the medicine cabinet. âWait.. Saturday? The release partyâs on Friday.â
âYeah.. I know.â
What the fuck? Thatâs bullshit theyâre keeping him longer than they have to. Struggling to understand how corporate can keep your brother on a leash and get away with it, you urge, âTell them to at least let you go home a day early. Donât you wanna support your friends?â
âYou mean Yoongi?â
A zing of terror zips through your eyes, freezing every vein in an instant.Â
The fuck was that question? Never mind. Stay calm stay calm stay fucking calm. âUhh, yeah, heâs one of them? But the other guys, too, right? I know you care about them and this is huge.â
Mercifully, your sibling just shakes his head and waves you off. âDonât you think I already tried? I donât wanna miss it but I donât have a choice. Conference schedule is pretty tight and Iâm heading the panel on Friday.â
âIs it in the morning? You can fly out afterââ
âWhy are you fighting so hard?â
âWhy arenât you fighting harder!â
Okay, what in the hell is happening right now? Screw optics and how this must look for you, your brother needs to be there. Him and Yoongi are the tightest of friends, the most ride or die duo youâve ever seen. You canât picture a timeline where he misses this monumental moment, and itâs starting to really upset you that heâs barely trying.Â
âAlright, you know what?â Hard steps surge forward as you stand rigid, a duffle hastily dumped onto tile. âYou donât know what Iâve tried. You donât even know if I even told him yet.â
Fucking shit. You hold his stare before turning away, tossing out the idea of bandages entirely and searing footsteps into the hallwayâ
âOr do you.â
Before icing over with the unforgiving frost of zero gravity space.Â
Slow, you turn, not quite facing him but not backing down, either. ââŠExcuse me?â
âYou heard me. You talkinâ? What else has he been doing to you?â
Oh. Fuck that.Â
Doing to you?Â
Fuck all of this. This is too much to handle right now and you know youâre gonna snap if he keeps pushing because you are not having this conversation right before he leaves. Youâve already thought about this before, right? You cannot fuck with his head right before business trips because he needs to be on and locked in.Â
But now heâs fucking with your temper and those are some choice fucking words pulled out of his ass.Â
You donât think youâve ever legitimately threatened this man to his face and meant it before, and it tears a sharp corner of your heart, âYou better be very careful. With whatever you wanna say next.â
The air proves too thick to slice. While your body stands aflame, your brother is iced over, brimming with an energy that damn near takes physical form. âAll Iâm saying is? I find out some fucking bullshit is going onââ
No no no, not now.
Reacting fast is your only instinct, brain haywire and fizzling fizzling boiling. Harsh, you spin on your heel and shout the first thing you can think of, âOh, come onââ
âYou better hope to god youâre ready for whatâs comingââ
âStop!â Fuck fuck fuck, this is so frustrating because your head is exploding and your body is screaming to just tell him already. Fuck the consequences at this point this is ludicrous.Â
Doing to you? Yoongi? How dare he speak about his best friend like that how dare he accuse him without outright saying the words all you have to do is tell your brother how wrong heâs got it.Â
But you canât be the one. Yoongi said he would, and he probably took months to get to that point of strengthâand healing, from what you can tell.Â
This is between them. Them. You have to honor that, as much as you wanna just confess everything now and deal with it yourself.Â
But goddamn your brother is pulsing with anger and itâs leaking into your own charged air.Â
What does he think is happening? Does he think Yoongiâs just, what, playing you? Heâs wrong. Heâs so wrong. Yoongiâs been nothing but the best thing thatâs ever happened to you and shit your heart hurts becauseâŠ
Your brother is valid in thinking that.Â
How foolish. Didnât you guard your heart from Yoongi for the longest? Didnât everything start because you figured you knew who he was because of his reputation? You got him all wrong, too. So how can you be mad at your brother for doing the same?Â
Fuck, think. Just think before someone gets hurt.Â
Because if you arenât careful, someoneâor multiple someonesâwill get hurt in seconds. You have to bear the pain alone right now. To protect them both, you have to keep your trembling mouth shut.Â
And? You have to admit that something isnât fair here. Not to you, not to Yoongi, but to him. Last night was rough as fuck but, while you both got to have raw, beautiful closure, the one standing in front of you had to go to sleep in an empty house.Â
So chill the fuck out.Â
Breathing to cool down, you tense and loosen, tense and loosen. âI get it. Youâre angry, and you have a lot going on. But,â you bite down on your lip to keep going. âWeâre talking about something else. Weâre talking about you, and Iâm still pissed you even let those guys goad you into a fight. What are we, twelve?â
Seething, your sibling takes the switch of pace. But it is not what you want to hear. âAre you seriâ? What the hell was I supposed to do? That son of a bitch grabbed youââ
âI know,â you recoil. âDonât tell me like you were there, because you werenât.â
Finallyâfinallyâthose angry lines in his face vanish.Â
But they make way for something much worse than anger. Because your older brother, someone thatâs been there for you your whole life..Â
Looks absolutely stricken over the one time he wasnât.Â
Damn it.Â
Regretful, you drop your shoulders in exhaustion and quiet compromise. When you continue, your voice is much softer, âBut I told you: they were. Your friends, they were there because they knew you wanted that. Jimin got me away, Yoongi took me home and stayed.âÂ
You really have got to stop saying his name like you love him. It could start becoming too obvious.Â
Shuddering, you shift your weight, folding your arms and shrinking into yourself.Â
That night, despite Yoongiâs best and most gentle efforts, still clings to where that loser touched you at Dalo. You hate that you havenât gotten over it, and you loathe the way you still rub over the same spot. Over, and over. âWhat did you want him to do? Leave me here?â
âNo.âÂ
âExactly. And he didnât.â You adjust your stance again, making an impromptu gamble as you decide to let some truth leak out. Because your brother is owed at least this much. âAnd fine, you wanna know something? We do talk more because of it.â
Your brotherâs head snaps up, and you brace. Because if you show any shred of weakness or hesitation, heâll see right through your weak attempt to hide most of the truth,Â
âBut donât ever accuse him of doing anything to me. That was fucked up to say and you know it.â
âFuck.â In agreement, he rubs his hair back. âIt was. Iâm sorry.âÂ
âTrust me,â you swallow, hating that this is how things have to be for now. âYou have nothing to worry about. Heâs never.. Never done anything to me, anyway.âÂ
Itâs not a lie. Everything heâs done has been with you. For you. Because of you.Â
But your heartâs in anguish as it sinks. Because that expression on your older siblingâs face can only be one thing. Â
Pure. Utter. Relief.
Fire singes your eyes before you can quell the flame. Itâs the hardest technical truth to swallow.Â
Sure, he doesnât have anything to worry about as far as you being safe. And on top of that, he doesnât have to worry about any fake shit because Yoongi confessed to you last night.
But as far as his best friend sleeping with and now dating his sister behind his back? That is still very much sitting right in the center of the table.Â
And now youâre starting to see just how fucked all three of you are as soon as you sit down to eat the truth.Â
But Yoongi said heâd be the one to tell, so he will.Â
This feeling is so fucking miserable, though.Â
In the end, your brother is effectively convinced, raking a hand across his head and sighing. âJimin told me what all went down at Dalo, I just⊠Last night was⊠Fucked up.âÂ
âWell, yeah.â
âNo. See, this is just like what you said to me. You canât say it like you were there.â
Itâs your stomachâs turn to twist. âSo? You were scratched and bruised to hell, and YâŠâ Shut up, shut up. Youâre not supposed to know about the state of anyone else. âAnd you were⊠quieter.â
âBecause of what happened, dude.â
You blink. âWhat⊠What happened?â
Your brother looks at youâreally looks at you.Â
And suddenly, your gut flares in terror, storming in an instant across your abdomen.Â
âThat bitch pulled something on us.â
Your heart.Â
Itâs in freefall.
âWait⊠What?â You canât even form more than one syllable at a time, your legs turning gelatinous and knees starting to give out. âNo⊠What are youâŠ?â
What the fuck did he just say? That bitch pulled a what?Â
Your sibling slowly walks toward you once again, watching like heâs just waiting for you to say anything. Do anything.Â
But youâre a complete statue because all you can think about is the horror of something happening and the relief that nothing happened all at once.Â
Was Yoongi too scared to mention that part? Is this why he was holding back and shaking every time he reached out to touch you? Even this morning, he was soâŠÂ
Youâve never seen him like that. Is this why?Â
Your mind is swirling and crashing, overlapping each passing thought and scream running through your head. âIâm so sorry,â you hitch out, âI didnât know. Why didnât you say anything?â
âDidnât wanna scare you,â he sighs out. Putting both hands on his hips, your brother stops feet away, visibly still shook as he pierces wooden planks with his stare. âBut he pulled it right before Yoongi⊠and if it werenâtâŠFuck.âÂ
Burns flare and slice through your eyes when he has to pause. What is he trying to say? Pulled what?Â
Before Yoongi what?Â
Your brother continues, and your throat tightens. âIf it werenât for some random ass sirens, I⊠Things couldâve been so different.âÂ
What the fuck is happening. What the hell are you hearing?Â
âIt was probably dumb as fuck. But I was so fucking angry,â he grits out, watery eyes crushed looking your way. âSo fucking mad at how he was talking about you, I.. Walked right up to him and told him to fuck off.â
You canât even breathe.Â
âI still feel it,â he quietly adds, fingers pressed against his side. âRight here.âÂ
âFuck,â you finally choke out, eyes on fucking fire.Â
âBut all I knew was to keep you all safe,â he says, with hardened resolve and a wobbly chin. âAnd thatâs exactly what I did. I did that shit, even if that meantââÂ
Tears fling out of your eyes, flowing hot down your cheeks because you wouldnât want any of them to go out that way. Nothing happened nothing happened nothing happened and yet your body is acting as if something did and it hurts.Â
Your brother is there as soon as you crumple forward, letting you bury your head in his chest and sob your heart out. For him, for his friends, and for all the time you had with the man you love so, so dearly.Â
If anything happened to your brother before you came clean⊠If anything happened before you and Yoongi could evenâŠÂ
Suddenly, you feel equal weights of guilt. For running out on your brother. And for almost walking out on Yoongi.Â
You decide an apology is in order for both of them, and all the understanding in the world for Yoongiâs frosted demeanor as soon as you get him alone again.
And you are one hundred percent going to tell your brother everything once heâs back.Â
The tears cannot stop, and youâre sure you are crying unimpeded in a pressed and primmed suit. âIâm so sorry,â you keep repenting like a prayer. âThis is all my fault.â
âNoââ
âYou almostââ
âHey, stop.â He yanks you back, both of your faces soaked with saltwater. âWhat did I say before? I threw the first swing. You didnât do anything wrong.â
âBut it led to all this, I just.. I just feel so fucking stupid.â
âDonât. Hey, look at me.â Firm but gentle, he holds you at armâs length, forcing you to face him. âMaybe weâre both stupid, but you werenât the idiot. I was.âÂ
You feel so many conflicting things in your soul.Â
What would you have done if Yoongi was in critical condition? What would you have done differently if your brother was instead? Are they the same? Are the two situations really so different anymore?Â
No they arenât they arenât they arenât.Â
âPlease donât do that again,â you shake out. âEven if it was for me, if I ever lost you, I...âÂ
âYou know I canât promise anything.â He furrows his brows when you eye him with anger and sadness. âBut nothing like that is happening again. Especially with the same dudes.âÂ
âOkay.âÂ
A vicious tornado of emotions sends your whole body into agonizing pain. This isnât what you expected at all, and itâs causing your limbs to lock at the bends. Too many scenarios are jangling about yet you canât ask for specifics because that will just make it even more real.Â
A nightmare is somehow better once you know it ends with you waking up. âIâm⊠gonna need some time to process everything.â
âI know. And I wasnât planning on saying anything, but⊠You deserve to know the things I get into.âÂ
Ah.Â
The irony is not lost on you.Â
âAt least, if they involve you. We learned our lesson. You were right to tell us off.â
God. You feel numb.Â
âThanks,â you murmur, suddenly immensely tired. âI think I need more sleep.â
A blaring honk sounds outside the house, and you both flinch at the noise.Â
And your throat burns at the way your brother instinctively swept you behind his back.Â
When you realize what it is, you know what has to come next.Â
And heâs the first to react as he turns to face you again, âAlright. Iâm heading out, just remember to go get my baby when sheâs fixed, yeah?â
âDo you have to go?â
Wait.
The question seems to startle him as much as it does you.Â
How did you blurt it right out before even registering the words? Why does your heart clench at the sight of those eyes looking so pained?Â
Why does everything feel so shaky within these walls that were always your home?
âI do,â he says, voice tight. âIâm sorry.âÂ
And why the fuck do you feel sad heâs leaving?
âNo, no, itâs.. Of course you have to.â You canât help the lump in your throat from bobbing, the regret in your limbs as they barely move at your side. âI dunno why I asked, I guess I just..âÂ
Thereâs no response to your sniffle.Â
âSorry for yelling,â you squeak out. âI just feel really queasy.â
For a lot more reasons than one.
âWe all made it out,â your brother whispers. âThatâs what matters.â
âWill you⊠Will you at least try to be back for the party?â
The man swallows with his brows knit tight, then attempts to crack the tiniest smile. âYou know I will. Thatâs my guy.âÂ
âOkay.â You nod, sniffling again. After what he just told you? You know heâll do anything for the ones he loves. âSee you there.â
Your brother rubs a comforting palm over your head before turning, heading for the door and grabbing his leather duffle.Â
When he stops to glance at you one more time, you give a little wave of your hand before watching the door click shut.Â
Chest caving as you collapse to the ground in tears.Â
â
â
The need to call Yoongi burns so harshly your fingers damn near set your top aflame.
But heâs at work, and you canât fuck things up right when youâre approaching the finish line. You almost did with your brother, and that gave you twelve heart attacks in the span of minutes.Â
Still. Your chest aches so much that a thirteenth could very well be approaching. You donât even realize youâre bracing the hallway wall for support until you try to stand, back sore and aching from bending so far for so long.Â
What did your brother mean to say about Yoongi? What did that coward pull on them? Do you even want to know what happened?Â
Fighting back tears, you reach down for your phone, shakily typing out a message only to erase it. Then again. And again.Â
And again.Â
Giving up, you forcefully swallow all your worries, cringing at the bitterness of the unknown and the burnt molasses of hidden truths.Â
Itâs going to be okay. No matter what you think or imagine in your head, they made it out, they made it out, they are all alive.Â
Thatâs the only reason you can move forward, each step getting you from your room. To your bathroom.Â
And back again.Â
â
â
After showering, you feel lighter and refreshed, though the soreness between your legs has yet to leave.Â
But you wouldnât want it any other way, as itâs another reminder of Yoongiâs apparent brush with survival. His broken living room spurned the creation of your bond, your devotion to him as he confessed before you gave him your utmost trust in his sheets.Â
The end is so close. As soon as this week is over, youâll rip the last bit of peel from your pair of tangerines, baring all truths to your brother and facing the consequences.Â
Finally ready, you head to your car, opening your text threads with a plan: start slow.Â
Start with something that can be interpreted neutrally if anyone saw it on his phone screen, especially if your headstrong ex is in the room.Â
You [12:31pm]: how are you feeling?
Yoongi [12:34pm]: 1 AttachmentÂ
You close your door with brows furrowed.Â
Yoongiâs at the hospital?Â
Thatâs not what you expected at all.Â
Your chest swells with relief knowing heâs there, but you also wanna make sure heâs feeling okay. Especially his mental state after whatever the fuck your brother just dropped on you before leaving.Â
Goddamn, thatâs going to gnaw at your brain until you find the right time and right amount of courage to ask about it. Because itâs very possible Yoongi wonât tell you.Â
Because itâs probably something he knows you wonât like.Â
Fuck.Â
You [12:34pm]: Loved an Attachment
You [12:34pm]: thank you for listeningđ€ still sore?
Yoongi [12:35pm]: Yeah, but not bad. Just there.
Wait. Heâs not at the studio. That means you canâ
Yoongi: Outgoing Call
âHey.â
âHey,â you slowly say as you pull out into the street. âIâm driving now so this is easier.â
âCourse. You going to Taeâs?â
âMaybe. Iâm going to Yuriâs first.â You swallow, realizing that you didnât tell him about what you let slip before driving over. âI.. Told her. About you.â
Thereâs a little bit of silence on the line, just some adjustments and muffled speaker sounds. âSorry, just writing this down. Whatâs wrong with that?â
You huff through your nose. Gotta be those patient forms that always take forever to fill out. âOh. Just more and more people knowing, is all.âÂ
âEveryoneâs gonna know eventually.âÂ
You hold back a small smile. Because heâs right. âYeah. Iâm just tired of this feeling.â
âLike youâre hiding something.â
Itâs your turn for silence. He doesnât know how accurately that was played out today. The only answer you can provide is a curt, âExactly.â
âSame.â
Wings beat around your heart again.Â
He wants this. Yoongi really, really wants this. And years ago, that outcome wouldnât have even crossed your mind as an option.Â
âThank you for going, baby.â
âThe guys made me.â
You hum. âWhich ones.â
After a pause, you hear a puff of amusement. âAll of them at some point today, actually.âÂ
All of them? Does that include your brother? Did they talk about the trip already?
Your laugh is bittersweet. âWell. Glad to know you can be forced by everyone else except me.â
âHey, I was already gonna go because of you!â Yoongi quietly retorts, and you giggle at the pout in his words. âJust wanted to get a headstart on work first.â
You were right. He really does wanna go all out for his musical endeavors.Â
Itâs extremely admirable, and wildly attractive, but it does come to a point. âAs much as I love your passion, old man, I wanna keep you upright.â
He laughs soft into the line, and you think you can listen to that specific sound on an infinite loop. âThatâs fair.âÂ
âHow long is it gonna take, you think?â
âDunno. But Iâll keep myself busy until Iâm out.â
Of course he will. You donât doubt he wonât waste any time. Didnât he bring journals in his backpack? You wouldnât be surprised if he wrote ten thousand songs before being called in. âJust call me if you need anything, please?â
âOf course, babe.â
âThank you,â you say with utmost sincerity. âIf only my brother would be less stubborn and get checked, too.â
âHeâll probably do it once he gets there.â
âDid you convince him?â
âNah. But once he knows I did, heâll do it.â
âFigures.â You scoff. âOkay, Iâm almost there. Let me know how it goes.â
âK. Bye, doll.â
You didnât ask him what went down. But itâs not the time nor place, and you have plenty of chances this week to figure out when that would beâif at all.Â
âTalk soon.âÂ
â
â
For a normally bustling household, Yuriâs house is quiet.Â
So itâs not shocking when you walk into the kitchen and see all your friends glance your way, slowly vacating their chairs with eyes never leaving your face. Even Reia is on high alert.Â
Did Yuri tell her? Did Yuri tell anyone else?Â
No. Sheâs a talker and loves spilling, but she promised. And when she promises something, you know you can trust her to keep it.Â
Itâs what pours emotion in your voice as you meekly greet, âHey, guysââ
A crushing hug closes your throat. Yuriâs the one that gets to you first, with Reia and Dominique waiting their turns to offer you healing, relieved embraces.Â
âWhat happened?âÂ
âScared us half to death.â
Dom puts you at armâs length to give a once over, noting your face rubbed raw and eyes still a little bloodshot. Thankfully, her pupils hold more concern than disappointment. âYou good?â
Your eyes wobble alongside your smile, and you think itâs enough proof. âMore than that,â you still decide to whisper, and your heart beats again at her reaction.Â
âThank god. I was ready to kick your ass if you werenât.â
Heading up to Yuriâs room, you all wait until the door is swung back before mounting her canopy bed, sitting in a tight circle as you divulge everything.Â
Well. Almost everything.Â
You tell them that Yoongi is the one youâve been seeing, how you went to check on him last night in a panic, and the terrifying reason why. When you mention the fight after the basketball game, all three of your friends erupt in questions, and you have to assure them everything turned out okay. Honestly, you also do this to assure yourself, too.Â
âSo⊠Your brotherâs just fine with all of this?â Reia asks, not noticing the tick of Domâs jaw.Â
âWell,â you start with a higher pitch, earning a pair of groans. âHe doesnât exactly know yetââ
âYup. Heâs gonna murder him.â
âYeah, should we say our condolences now or..â
âHow long has this been going on?â Reia fires off another question that digs into your chest. âWas he the one you were seeing the whole time?â
âYes,â you admit with a sigh. âI shouldâve told you guys from the beginning, but. The whole thing just felt so delicate. But! We just started making things official recently, so..âÂ
Dom turns your way. âOfficial how?â
Well. Here goes everything.Â
With a shaky breath, and lingering feelings from the time it happened, you reveal with watery eyes, âYoongi⊠Told me he loves me.â
Both Yuri and Reia react in yelps, Domâs gaze lowering as the girls reach to grab your hands.Â
Wait. Whatâs going on with her? Sheâs the one that knows the most, sheâs the one that covered for you all those months ago. She has to be the one that is the least surprised at all this.Â
Blinking, you note to confront her about it later. Right now, youâre too focused on trying not to cry as your friends tumble out questions and support,Â
âHe said it? Did you say it first or did he?âÂ
âHow did it happen! Oh, Iâm so happy for you, babeââÂ
âThankâthank you, Yuri,â you squeeze out as she hugs you close. âI couldnât believe it, but he just.. Said it. We werenât even doing anything, I was just.. Looking up what injuries he could have..âÂ
And he confessed in the most Yoongi fashion he could have.Â
Looking back, it shouldnât shock you at all. Heâs always found ways to sweep you off your proverbial feet, so why would a confession plucked from the heavens be any different?Â
She lets you go before wiping her eyes, Reia and even Dom now sporting watery pupils, too.Â
âAs much as Iâm upset at you for not telling us, Iâve never been so happy for you.â When Yuriâs features crease in another sob, you sniffle along with the rest. âItâs been so long since you⊠And you really.. Fuck.âÂ
You know what sheâs trying to say, and the realization has your throat constricting so tight.Â
Itâs been forever since youâve had something like this, someone like this. When you and Jungkook were together, you told him that you loved him before he broke it off.Â
Sure, you bought the rings together, but he never uttered those words until years after when it didnât even matter. And all your relationships after his were complete and utter bullshit, so you donât think you ever even heard those three words and knew them to be true.Â
Yoongi was the first to ever say them so sincerely.Â
And that fact makes your ducts burn and burn.Â
And when Yuri finally speaks, it breaks the dam holding your real deluge back,Â
âI canât think of anyone else that deserves to be loved more than you.âÂ
All at once, everything streams out as you hunch forward. The pain of everything youâve endured, the hopelessness of knowing youâd most likely end up alone, the excruciating prospect of a future that you never deemed bright, or peaceful, or comforting.Â
And to think that even this man couldâve been snatched away from you in a snap? Even more tears overlap with the ones youâre shedding, and you canât even reach out to hug all three beautiful, angelic souls surrounding you with tight arms and sobs because your limbs lock at all bends.Â
Itâs the exact release you need. All your friends supporting you, all the pent up anxiety of last night and today, the truth setting itself free in some capacityâall in the comfort of a plushie-laden bed you only doubted yourself in last time.Â
Everythingâs gonna be alright. It has to be. Youâre gonna fight for the ones you love, even if a war between them is inevitable.Â
It takes a few minutes of heavy silence for you all to separate, swiping and rubbing tears while letting out happy sniffles.Â
When you thank them for being understanding, they assure you itâs okay. And when you say youâre going to tell your brother soon, a force from the doorway has all of you leaping from lilac sheets,Â
âTell him what?âÂ
Jia stands firm with a laundry basket at her hip, and Yuri scoffs at her older sister for barging in. âA knock wouldâve been nice!âÂ
Fuck!Â
You canât tell Jia of all people. If you spill anything about Yoongi, sheâs one hundred percent going to tell your brother. Theyâre the same age, and run in pretty tight circles, so of course you are not going to risk it.Â
But you can tell her something else youâre going to tell your older sibling, so you fire out a half-truth,Â
âTell him not to pick any other fights that could get him killed.âÂ
Jiaâs eyes zoom to your wrecked face, and she drops the laundry with haste before asking, âWhat happened? When? Tell me now.âÂ
Huh. Maybe your brother has a type, if heâs still into Jia like he said before.Â
You feel a little spark in your chest as you let her know they all got in a scuffle after the basketball game, and another pang as she immediately abandons the room and clothes with a fierce declaration,Â
âIâm gonna kill them myself!âÂ
âDonât worry, I already hounded my brother!â You call out after her, sighing as Yuri shakes her head with a smile. âShe gets like that when sheâs really worried, huh.âÂ
âYeah..â Your friend leans to look around you, noticing the basket left alone on the ground. âAnd if sheâs super fired up, she drops everything and doesnât stop until itâs handled. Clearly.âÂ
Maybe both older siblings really are similar.Â
The firestorm of an interruption seemed to break the tension in the room, with all of you finally relaxing and catching up. When they ask you questions, you answer what you can.Â
And when you divulge information that has your ears burning, their squeals and yells give you whole new reasons to live.Â
â
â
After a very comforting lunch Yuriâs mom cooked, you head to the bathroom when your phone suddenly vibrates through your palm.
Huh? Thatâs weird. You expect the name on your screen to be Taehyung, not Yoongi.Â
Not that itâs a bad thing. Youâve been waiting to hear from him, so this is a pleasant surprise.Â
Closing the door to the guest bathroom, you gaze at the calming sage decor with a smile. âHi, how did itââ
âYouâre coming over later, right?â
Oh, shit. Is he okay?
âYes, baby,â you respond with a soothing lilt, ears perked and body on high alert.Â
Does he think you arenât anymore? You both decided on the plans earlier. Surely he knows youâd never just flake on him. âIâm coming back once youâre done with work, remember?â
Thereâs an uncomfortable pause on the line, which makes your boyfriendâs next question jab you so far in the lungs you canât breathe,
ââŠCan it be now?â
Shit.Â
Just like Jia earlier, you drop every plan you have to the wayside. Youâre sure that Taehyung will understand, and you already got through the biggest conversation you needed to with your friends.Â
âOf course,â you whoosh out. âLemme just say bye and Iâll go.âÂ
âTake your time.â A small shuffling interrupts. âItâll take me a bit to get back.âÂ
âOkay. See you there.âÂ
The strained urgency in his voice makes your hair stand on end, so you vacate the bathroom to inform the girls that you gotta goâbut not without a quick head tilt towards Dom, who follows you outside and into the afternoon sun. Â
â
â
You wait until youâre next to your car on the street, turning with a concerned expression and jittery nerves, âWhatâs up with you? Did I do something wrong?â
Turns out, you read Dominique correctly. Her jaw locks before loosening, and it reminds you of the time she confronted you about Yoongi before. God, how much has changed since then. That feels like ages and ages ago.Â
âItâs not about you,â your best friend clears the air and the tightness in your shoulders. âIâm just.. Glad he came around.â
âYoongi?â When Dom nods, you blink. âWait, what?â
âAt your house that night.. After he left your room, we hadâI dunno, a heart-to-heart.â She sighs, flicking braids over her shoulder. You note to compliment the beads she chose this time, because they remind you of summer and simpler times. âI mightâve pressured him a bit, and.. I think he wanted to tell me that he loved you. All the way back then.âÂ
Something in your heart stutters, and you can only repeat your last question, âWhat?â
âYeah. Something about needing to do something first,â she continues, holding your gaze with perfect brows furrowed in sunlight. âBut I could tell he was damn serious about whatever it was. And if he was willing to do it for you? I let it go.âÂ
Your mind whirls.Â
Yoongi was already in love with you back then? Is that why he needed to let you go? To deal with whatever he had to do?Â
One side of you breaks thinking he had to go through all that alone; the other side is screaming at his past self for not even giving you a choice. What did he go through? What did he have to do?
Now you really have to see him. Immediately.Â
âThank you, Dom,â you rush out while opening your door. âIâm just happy itâs over.â
âThe hell itâs not.â Shooting you a glare that heats the oncoming breeze, she reminds, âItâs not over until your brother knows. And based on everything thatâs happened? That conversation is not gonna go over well.âÂ
A dark, simmering boil starts in your stomach, and youâre already feeling queasy again. Tightening your door handle, you gulp hard. âI know.âÂ
âTrust me, Iâm happy for you both. I am.â Both hands find her hips as she levels a gaze that you really, really donât enjoy. âBut Iâm gonna be honest, I think this is gonna ruin their friendship for good.âÂ
Both of your lungs clamp shut.Â
âPlease donât say that,â you beg, âIâm gonna fight for all of us. I will.âÂ
âI donât doubt that, babe. Hey, uh uh, come here.â Reaching out, she gives you a tight hug just when you feel fragile again.Â
âListen to me. I donât doubt that,â she says into your shoulder. âIâm just here to be realistic. Just donât be shocked if thatâs how it goes. Weâll be here for you no matter what, too.âÂ
âOkay,â you say with a scrunched face into her scent. God, she always smells so good, and itâs almost enough to calm you down. Almost almost almost. âThank you. But Iâm not giving up.âÂ
âThatâs my girl.â She squeezes you one more time. âI love you.âÂ
With eyes searing over, you choke and grip her tighter. âI love you, too.âÂ
â
â
Yoongiâs door warms your back as you wait for him to show.Â
But thereâs a good chance it can just be your volcanic anxiety.Â
Ever since your arrival, youâve paced, youâve gnawed on your lips, youâve had to shake the nerves out of your hands.Â
And over and over, youâve strained your neck to look for your favorite cat, because you could sincerely use even a glimpse of her right now.Â
While she doesnât end up showing, Yoongi rounds the nearest corner minutes after your last desperate scan.Â
Fuck, heâs so handsome.Â
Even now, as he simply walks toward you with a backpack slung over his shoulder, you watch with undying yearning to feel those flowing bangs over his forehead. Youâd even settle for a single touch of his cheeks, one of them currently sporting a thin bandage.
But the closer Yoongi gets, the quicker your admiration morphs into concern. Thereâs a deep bend in his brows that you canât decipher, and his fist is balled pretty tight.Â
Seriously, what happened? He looks so troubled that you slowly push off the doorway to ask,Â
âBaby, whatâsââ
A bag hits the ground before youâre swooped into a kiss so electric your lips spark.Â
Him. Him, him, and more him. For the love of everything you donât understand whatâs happening but you kiss Yoongi back with everything you have, arms slinging around his strong shoulders and tugging him closer because he clearly needed this.Â
And fuck if you didnât need it just as much. Screw it if anyone sees you. This is all you want and youâll stay right here until he pulls away.Â
When he finally does, both of you swallow to catch your breaths, and your soul glimmers when his forehead meets yours.Â
âHi, baby,â you whisper to his exhales. âMissed you, too.â
Silent, your lover kisses your forehead before hugging you close, and youâre more sure of your prediction than ever. Something is bothering him.Â
He doesnât look worse, at least. But thereâs clearly something off and heâs not hiding it. His lack of words is loud enough.Â
âLetâs go inside,â you quietly suggest. âI wouldâve gone in already but I donât have a key.â
He nods, fishing out his keyring to let you both inside.Â
When you set your bags down and slip off your shoes, itâs only seconds before youâre softly pulled into a hug again, surprising yet so, so welcoming.Â
Even only after a few hours, youâve missed the fuck out of him. Which makes all of this an outright dream.Â
âSorry,â Yoongi finally murmurs against your shoulder. âI justâŠâ
âNothing to be sorry for.â You stroke a hand along his hair, massaging his scalp and loving how soft it feels. The windswept strands fall back into place as you keep running your fingers through. âDid you at least get your appointment?â
âYeah, I did.â He buries his face further. âNothing bad. Just canât lift anything heavy for a couple days.â
âGood. Thatâs easy to manage,â you whisper back into his tee, feeling the chill of lingering air conditioning and body warmth all at once. âIs something else bothering you?â
âNot exactly.â Whatever that means. âIâll tell you about it later. Just wanted this, and you.â
Oh. ThatâsâŠÂ
âIâm here now, love,â you assure with a melting heart, wondering what happened to cause this behavior.Â
Is it because of last night? Or something that happened today? Youâre anxious all over again, but from the way Yoongiâs acting, your worries are second to his. âHave you eaten yet?â
He shakes his head, only pulling you closer with not a word from his lips.Â
And from this point on, you make a silent vow to yourself. Whatever Yoongi needs, youâre going to take care of him.Â
No matter what, these next few days are all about himâa minuscule sacrifice in comparison to everything heâs done for you, whether you knew about it or not.
âIâll make you something then. Come on.âÂ
When you walk, you slip your hand down his arm to hold his hand, and your lead into his kitchen is short.Â
âAny requests?â You cheerfully ask as you spare a smile over your shoulder. âWe can do⊠Something lightâŠâ
Only to see him staring back with nothing but a lingering sense of longing.
Okay.Â
You need to get to the bottom of this now.Â
Stopping right over linoleum, you leave no room for arguments, âYoongi. Tell me whatâs wrong.â
He blinks before his gaze meets the floor. So youâre confused when he simply, quietly..Â
Laughs?Â
âItâs not that somethingâs wrong,â he slowly starts, a shy smile carving his features. âFor the first time in my life, nothingâs wrong.âÂ
Your heart beats extra loud.Â
âBut itâs too much to explain right now.â His eyes rise to meet yours. âJust know that Iâm so in love with you.âÂ
Oh.
âAnd I want you to know that every day I live.â
Fuck.
Your body responds before you can say anything, lips connecting to remove any need for speech. The knowledge of them all staring death in the face last night makes this confession sear your insides, and you canât help but kiss him like youâll never get to again.Â
Yanking him back, you spin on your heel until he flings into the kitchen, clutching your wrists before gripping your jaw with both hands.Â
His mouth heats on yours, his glasses the only barrier between your skin. Everything sizzles from your head to your toes, and you both bang into a countertop beforeâ
âFuck, ouch.â
âShit, you okay?â
Yoongi rubs his side with one eye pinched shut, a corner of his teeth present. âYeah. Worth it, though.â
âBe serious,â you reprimand. Looks like heâs gonna have to take it easy, which means no going at it like animals until heâs on the mend. âNo more until you feel better, yeah?â
âSays who?â
âBabe.â
His deadly pout almost breaks your resolve. âFine.âÂ
But you can wait. Youâre sure it wonât take long, and for this man? Youâll wait however long you need to.Â
Besides, thereâs plenty of things you can do in the meantime that donât require running into hard objects.Â
âGood. Now letâsâŠâ You turn away to get started before youâre held, and pulled back into yet another embrace.Â
What the hell is happening today? Your lungs and your melting pile of a brain can only take so much. Itâs beautifully overwhelming how Yoongi canât seem to let you go, because youâre the one that always loses control.Â
This whole time, itâs been you that canât hold yourself back.Â
So now? Being on the other side? You donât think you ever want him to restrain himself again.Â
This time, he moves slow. Sensuously slow, and it would occur to you that heâs finding a very cheeky loophole to your plan if you werenât so hazy-eyed.Â
Whatever Yoongiâs doing, you wonât stop him.Â
Your back touches a counter before Yoongi cages you in, and your lips mold together as perfectly as his body does with yours. Your unhurried strokes match his, and your minds communicate without a single word.Â
Thereâs yearning still ever present. But thereâs comfort in abundance, and a whole new level of need.Â
After he pulls away, you can visibly see him drink you in from head to toe.Â
âYou know.. Iâm good holding off on all the other shit.â Pulling you in, his lips curve as he confidently declares, âBut Iâm never gonna stop kissing you.âÂ
His hands, his lips, his words. They all have healing powers, youâre so sure of it. If Yoongi hasnât yet realized his unending pain has blossomed into a safe haven, you need to let him know no matter what,Â
âGood.â
Thereâs still a pining in his eyes, but he lets you free, hand skirting your hip before he walks to his room. âGonna change then Iâll help.âÂ
âYou donât have to, baby,â you say as you struggle to catch your breath. âI got it.âÂ
Three minutes later, heâs chopping an onion anyway.Â
But youâre loving how serene everything feels with the two of you prepping and dicing, thumps of knives on wood intertwining in sound before you laugh at his crying over the pesky vegetable. Maybe if he wore contacts instead of specs, heâd be better off.Â
Not that his choice of eyewear is what youâre complaining about. But those glasses paired with the cream tees heâs been wearing? There will be hell to pay as soon as you get a chance at revenge.Â
Your pot is set to boil for a bit, so you finally rest against the counter and start a timer on his microwave. âGo ahead,â you gesture to your very handsome cooking partner. âYou can sit now.â
âHuh? Weâre not done yet.â
âOh.â Blinking, you tilt your head in confusion because you couldâve sworn you heard him yawn a couple times. âYou arenât tired?â
âI am,â he says before squeezing his eyes, rapid blinks to follow. âBut Iâm fine here.â
You toss and turn the food around, sprinkling a little more seasoning and hearing the bubbles and fizzes. When you stir a little more, a sudden thought occurs, halting your movements and spinning you around,Â
âAre you staying there to watch my ass.â
Yoongiâs slow smile gives everything away, but he also makes up for the blatant staring.Â
âCanât deny thatâs one of the things.â Pushing off the sink, he stands right next to you, slotting a hand behind your neck and angling you for a kiss. âBut I meant it earlier. I justâŠâ
Youâre completely silent as you watch him slide his eyes from your face to the sizzling food. Whatever heâs thinking about, youâre gonna give him all the room to talk.Â
âJust like being where you are.âÂ
How you went from almost running out of his door to here, you arenât quite sure. But youâre grateful for that split second of him deciding to fight for the two of you instead of against, because you really were going to leave.Â
And you may have taken much, much longer to even try going back.Â
Your voice is barely heard over the aromatic smell and fizzle, âGood thing I like having you around.â When he smiles again, you let out a breath of a giggle, going back to shuffling the pan around and tilting your head to the fridge. âI put some fruit in there if you wanna eat that, too.â
âIâm down.â
âK.â
Your food is ready soon enough, and the two of you eat while talking about easy topics. Like work and your workplace dynamics, what Yoongiâs team has been working on at the studio.Â
At one point, your curiosity about the album release party grows from something he says. âSpeaking of. The partyâs on Friday, right?â
âYeah.â
âOkay, I thought so,â you deflate, setting your bowl down on the table. âSorry he canât go.â
âHuh?â
Your body stills. âWait. Did he not say anything? About his trip being extended?â
So much for nothing in his life being wrong. From the lost look on his face, you may have given him another reason to fold back in on himself. âNo.. No, he didnât.â
Both of you sit in silence.Â
This could be nothing. Right? That means your brother is confident he can make it so thereâs no point in telling Yoongi heâs gonna miss it. Or maybe heâs not trying hard enough and then not being able to say it to his face?Â
âIâm sorry,â you apologize. âI thought he told you.â
âItâs okay.â Clearly itâs not. âNot much to do about it now.â
âYoongi⊠What if he knows?â At your own question, you stiffen, curling into a proverbial ball. Fear and the sick backfire of fibbing has your mouth going drier than desert air. âWhat if he actually knows?â
Setting down his chopsticks, Yoongi looks your way, eyes unreadable behind his specs. âIf he did, do you think heâd leave us alone?â
Heâs got a point. âGuess not.âÂ
âMm.â Flicking his eyes to the window, he adjusts uncomfortably in his chair. âAnd I dunno if I mentioned this, but.. He thinks I got back with my ex.â
âFuck, really?âÂ
âThatâs the real reason why he hasnât been talking to me. Maybe he thinks sheâs gonna be there on Friday.â
âOh.â Your shoulders sag, and sag. Not owning up to your relationship is one thing; Yoongi having to dwell in his previous relationship is another. âIs that⊠worse?â
âShit.â Reaching across wood, you close your hand around his fingers for support. Itâs the only thing you can think to do. At least, itâs what you would want if you were in his shoes. âI think you should tell him she wonât be.â
A million seconds later, Yoongi thankfully agrees. âYeah, I will.â
You feel better. Somewhat. At least a little less nauseous about the possibility of your brother knowing.Â
But it still sucks knowing that heâs actively avoiding Yoongi because of an ex he used to have.Â
How bad was it back then if this is the case? What exactly happened? Is this why Yoongi went radio silent on you for weeks?
It seems like he doesnât even wanna talk about her. So you wonât pry just yet, as much as you wanna know every single thing sheâs done wrong so you can hound her through every timeline in existence.Â
Instead, you talk about a much better subject,Â
âWe should feed my cat now.â
And you quickly laugh at the saucy glint in Yoongiâs eyes.Â
â
â
Everything is set where it needs to be. Sugarâs food and water fill their respective bowls, your shoulder leans into Yoongiâs good side, and his arm rests around your back as heâs propped up by his banged up doorway.Â
You remember the first time you saw him lean against the wood like this. Only that time, you were a shell of a girl, waiting with shaky breaths and shaken confidence to hear his response to your inappropriate request.Â
Who wouldâve thought that youâd be on the same side as him all these months later? In his arms, resting a head on his warm chest?Â
When you let out a short chuckle, Yoongi turns to your smile. âHmm?âÂ
âNothing,â you wisp out. âJust thinking about us.âÂ
His fingers press into your side a fraction more, and you can feel him lift his head again. âMe, too.âÂ
Umm.Â
You can say things like that. He isnât allowed!Â
Youâre about to set some one-sided rules before your gift pops out of the bushes a few feet away.Â
âMy baby!â you quietly call, leaving Yoongiâs side to crouch down. âCome here, love. You hungry?â
She cautiously makes her way over, sniffing your hand when you leave it outstretched. After careful consideration, the little one nudges your palm, letting you glide fingers down her back as she approaches her bowls.Â
âYouâre so tiny,â you observe with slight pity. âWeâll get you well fed in no timeââ
âHey, Sugar! Oh, is this her? Sheâs gorgeous, no wonder!â
Huh? Sugar?Â
Who else knows the catâs name already?
Your neck almost strains when you look up to see whoâs talking. When you notice an older lady donning a really comfy, fluffy robe, you feel like it looks super familiar before you stand.Â
âHi,â you greet before introducing yourself, extending your hand and shaking the womanâs soft, delicate fingers. âSorry if we were too loud.â
âCall me Miss Dion. And you werenât too loud this time, sweetie,â she says with a wink, glancing down at the kitty eating what you laid out. âWas just cominâ out to water my plants so itâs good to see youâre here, too. Looks like he finally got some sense back in that head of his.â
âIâm standing right here, you know.â
âOh, I know!â
Back? How long has she known about you? Do her and Yoongi actually converse regularly? Their banter is⊠Really adorable.Â
Itâs making you fall even more in love with the man biting his cheek in amusement.Â
Wait.Â
Is Yoongi Sugar?Â
That is so fucking cute you could cry.Â
âIâm back to take care of this guy,â you explain with a head tilt. âAnd the little one, of course.âÂ
Itâs when you say this that Miss Dion notices the bandages on Yoongiâs face, concern pushing down her brows. âWhat happened to you, young man?â
âNothing to worry about.âÂ
âYou sure? I got some ointment in my kitchen somewhereââ
âItâs all goodââ
âWeâll take it,â you cut him off, not looking but feeling his stare on your face. âHow much do we owe you?âÂ
âOh, donât you worry about that.â With a snuff at Yoongi and a smile your way, Miss Dion heads inside to fetch a bottle.
In the meantime, you give your lover a quiet stare before bending down to run your hands over soft fur.Â
âPapa Sugar is gonna need that so he canât argue,â you coo to your cat, cheekily ignoring Yoongiâs sputtering puff of air above your head.
âPapa Sugar? Really?â
You glance up to his smile with a mischievous one of your own. âWhat, you wanna be Sugar Daddy instead?â
The swirl in your belly is instant. Because Yoongi can only look out into the distance, biting his lip and failing to hide his grin.
Sigh. If only he didnât have those injuries across his face. Youâd push him back into the door and slam it shut if it was any other day.Â
Patience, patience, patience.Â
Those hits arenât gonna heal with just one round of gauze.Â
When you have to replace the cotton patches, at least youâll have something to help.Â
â
â
Itâs not until youâre about to tuck in for the night that Yoongi approaches your side of the bed. Judging by the headphones slung around his neck, heâs about to work, so you assume heâs just coming to give you a kiss goodnight.Â
But after he does exactly that, he asks you a question that warms your chest,Â
âWhereâs your keys.âÂ
âIn there,â you motion to the nearest wall, bag propped right under his windowsill. âInside pocket, I think.âÂ
Yoongi bends with a prolonged grunt, slowly rummaging until he finds your jangling keyring with its charms. When he grabs it, he silently sits on the edge up against your stomach, body heat permeating your tee while he fiddles with the clasps.Â
God, youâre so in trouble. You know exactly what heâs doing.Â
Unlike the last time he offered you complete access to his place, this time he didnât even hesitate. And the way he secures a key amongst the loop, itâs his silent way of cementing permanence.Â
Thatâs not another key for you to borrow.
Because that key is yours.
â
â
continued in angel, pt. 2
pitstop inbox before pt2!! | join the server!
a/n: holy crap we're doing it we are actually back in the main storyline?! how do we feel right now because i am over the damn moon diving into this story again. here's a slight pitstop before you make your way over to part two (THE CONTINUATION IS IN A REBLOG!) so take a breather before heading into the resttttttt
++ feedback box:
â„ of course, any reblogs/comments/messages are appreciated!
â„ for the ones that are too shy to reblog with a review, comment on this, or send a message, i went ahead and made another anonymous form where you can send in what you think!
â„ no emails collected, no need to put in a username. itâs literally just a comment dropbox :D feedback can be as short/sweet or as long as youâd like!
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a/n 2: we did this for 3tanfugue and the energy was great! just like last time, some of you guys suggested that we have post goals to encourage interaction. no one voted against it yet, so we'll keep it goin!
note goal: since we're back in main storyline, upping the goal! 1,000 notes is the goal, so when we hit that, 3tan14 will be dropped as soon as it's done! thank you all for reading and would love to hear any thoughts: what did you like about the chapter? how did a certain scene make you feel? what are you excited to see next? any shares, comments, tags, and reblogs with commentary count, and i appreciate anything you guys have to say.
note 1: thank you so so much for the support! y'all you donât know how much it means to me. also, pls donât hesitate to let me know what you liked about the chapter with a message. it would mean so much.Â
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explicit warnings: cursing, thigh riding, cowgirl, oral (m rec), naughty studio time(??), couch sex, rough sex, giving yoongi the business, bold as fuck reader, choking, spanking, penetrative sex, kissing deserves to be here too lol, alexa play no hands by waka flocka, deep throating, hair/head tugging, nipple play, yoongi in that gd tank, yoongi in those gd glasses, teasing, titty fucking hello!!!!, stripping while he watchesâŠ. yeah, missionary, sub!3tanyoongi?????, scratching, multiple orgasms, protected sex, emotional sex, the glasses.. stay on??, good god theyâre so hot iâm blushing
â
â
Itâs morning when Jimin gets a call.Â
Shifting in sheets that arenât his, he sleepily blinks once before eyeing the blue light with a squint, wondering who dares wake him up before his natural rise. What time even is it anyway? Itâs gotta be an ungodly hour if his circadian rhythm is disturbed.Â
Still, he grabs his cell from the nightstand, flinching at the movement behind him and inwardly slinging out curses.Â
Because waking him up is one thing.Â
But if anyone disturbs Taehyung heâs gonna give them hellâ
Min Yoongi: Incoming Call
Shit.
Jimin yanks the covers off, rushing out of bed and snapping Tae awake anyway. For what? Donât fucking know, but theyâre ready. Wherever. Whatever. They already stayed up clutching their phones until they physically couldnât keep their eyes open.Â
Because as much as Yoongi assured him nothing would happen, Jimin still couldnât let go of his car keys.
Answering slow, he feels his chest winding and winding, eyes locked with Taehyung while they both wait on edge, ââŠYoongi?â
âYeah.â
Thank the fucking stars.Â
Yoongiâs okay. Heâs on the line. He made it to morning or whatever fucking time it is, and heâs doing exactly what he said he would.
And itâs enough, enough, enough.
Burns zing up the corners of Jiminâs eyes, and he swipes hard as Taehyung moves, likely to hear whatâs happening and even more likely to just be by his side.Â
Jimin is grateful for either one. But he tries to keep composure as he croaks, âYou better have woken me up for a reason.â
The slight hum on the line induces a wobbly smile. âYou slept?â
âFuck you,â Jimin shakily laughs, wiping liquid relief from an eye before Taehyungâs thumb brushes tenderly over the other. His gaze is thankful while continuing, âWe did but not much.â
âSorry.â
âItâs okay.â Sniffling, Jimin walks to Taeâs door, letting him into the hallway first and finally drinking in the sight of his ass in those sweats. Because he can finally function like a normal, smitten loser again. âWeâll come over so we canââ
âNo need.â
âWhat?â Nope. Back to panic mode. And judging from his boyfriendâs posture, Taehyung has backpedaled into that, too. âWhat do you mean no need?â
Thereâs a slight pause on the line, and small noises make their way through the speaker. It sounds like bedsheets, but it also sounds likeâŠÂ
âSheâs still sleeping.â
Oh.
Oh, shit.
A tidal wave of relief crashes into Jiminâs ducts as he hangs his head, palming his face caught in a heavy tide of emotion. When he turns, Taehyung fairs no better, his eyes red and fingers wiping at a perfect, perfect cheek. One of them sniffles, but Jimin canât tell if itâs him or not, because his vision is blurry and his heart is beating, beating, beating again.Â
Whether you know it or not, whatever you did last night may have just changed Yoongiâs entire life.
Because Jimin knows this man through and through. Years of picking up his habits and tells didnât amount to nothing. Itâs how he was able to sense exactly when to intervene, and how he knew exactly what that hauntingly hollow tone in Yoongiâs voice meant when he busted in that day.Â
The tone he hears now? The man that just spoke on the line?Â
That is a Min Yoongi so in love he canât even hide it over the phone.Â
Fuck.Â
Gathering himself, Jimin squeaks out, âI⊠Iâm glad youâŠâ What the fuck does he say? Every thought jams in his throat so hard he has to hand the phone off.
Thankfully, Taehyung perfectly continues his thoughts, voice scratching rocks under a waking river, âWeâre glad youâre both safe.â
âMm.â
âSo whenâs the wedding?â
Jimin huffs through a fresh batch of tears, clearing his face before grinning at Tae very seriously awaiting an answer. Honestly, at this point? Itâs not far-fetched. Jiminâs seeing your future clearer than his present, and maybe he will be a fun uncle sooner than he thinks.
If only Yoongi would just get the fucking talk with your brother over with.Â
But Jimin understands the hesitation. If he were in that same position, thereâs no telling when he would be courageous enough to stand up to the guy. Thereâs a reason heâs quick to command a room, and his lifelong mission to protect his younger sister made him grow up a lot faster than everyone else.Â
Still⊠Yoongi just deserves to be happy. And youâre the very obvious answer to helping with that.Â
As much as he may have wanted some chances of his own, Jimin is grateful you found your way into his best friendâs heart. Not just anyone is invited inside, and even less people can truly be allowed to stay.Â
And youâre probably the only one that has permanent residence.Â
âYou guys should get some sleep.â
Taehyung pouts right on cue, and Jimin canât fight those sleepy, droopy eyes. âYou didnât answer me.â
Cute as fuck! He must be stopped. Taking the phone, Jimin speaks into the line fully recovered, shooting his cheeky partner a teasing glare, âWe will if you get some, too.â
âCanât.â
âWhy not?â
âGot some things to do at the studioââ
âNo!â They reject together, both equally as appalled because what the fuck kinda answer is that?Â
âAfter what happened last night? Are you crazy?â
âWhat happened to spending time with her? Men!âÂ
âHeâs going on a business trip, I canât lose to him.â
âSo what?â Tae asks before they both share an even further confused look. Yoongi may be a lovesick fool but that doesnât give him an excuse to be a dumbass! âYouâre just gonna leave her alone?â
Thereâs a sigh on the line before Jimin plants a hand on his hip. âNot just that. You gotta rest, too, bro. If she doesnât tell you to take it easy or at least get checkedâwhich she willâweâre going over there to annoy you.âÂ
âYou serious?â
âYes, Iâm serious.â Jimin cocks his head and leans closer to the phone. âAt least rest easy for the next couple days. Especially if you have all this time to see each other.â
The timing couldnât be more perfect. Your brother is leaving for his trip and Yoongi caught some unfortunate hits to his ribs. The dude basically has a free pass to spend the whole week with you, and heâs not even taking full advantage of it? Oh, the things Jimin has to say about the thin line of work ethic and relationship effort.Â
âIâll think about it.â
âThink about it for a long time,â Taehyung cuts in before Jimin can pop off, walking away into the living room.Â
Itâs fine. Let him figure out that you arenât a woman he can just leave. Frankly? That would tickle Jimin to no end to see Yoongi folding his plans so fast just to be with you.Â
But he spares him the tirade only because youâre fast asleep right next to him. âThank you for calling, man.â
âSaid I would.â
âI know.âÂ
Because above all else, Jimin is happy to hear that voice. Even if itâs obvious heâs a little banged up from last night, itâs still Yoongi. In one piece. Thatâs all Jimin wanted, and he canât thank you enough,
âDonât overwork yourself, and stay with her as long as you can.â
Thereâs a small laugh on the other end. âI plan on it, Chim.â
And Jimin catches on to why. âIâm holding you to that then.âÂ
â
â
Dawn breaks through open blinds, stretching its orange tint across a clean, spotless table.Â
You donât know what got you up so early. But when you peer into the kitchen, you tell yourself you woke up right on time.Â
Because seeing Yoongi when youâre wide awake is better than any dream youâll ever have.
Not because of his appearance, even though the sight of him sends a pang through your chest. No. Itâs the way heâs quietly prepping a morning meal, using the arm on his better side thatâs not sporting a nasty hit to the ribs, without you even asking.Â
Bits of sunlight dance right out of your eyes.
The effort. The consideration. This man shouldnât be lifting a finger, yet here he is cooking before you even left his bed. Isnât this the same man that got caught up in a fight hours ago? Isnât this the same man you almost walked out on with a frozen heart?Â
Yes. But heâs also the same man that loves you. And you still canât grasp that concept in any of the fingers playing with his tee you borrowed.
âHi,â you whisper, telling him a thousand things.Â
To which he regards before smiling soft, voice travelling over linoleum and circling around your heart, âMorning, doll.â
Damn. You hear it. Yoongiâs sore as hell.Â
But instead of getting into that right away, you silently take residence by his side. Because this moment feels too delicate, and you admire his willingness to take care of you unprompted. You didnât even know youâd eat before going back home.Â
With a hand warming his back, you wait until Yoongiâs done tossing food on the stove to peck his morning-chilled cheek. âThank you for cooking,â you murmur, admiring those beautiful brown eyes. âSleep okay?â
âCus of you,â your lover softly responds, eyeing your lips before gliding back up to your gaze. âYou?â
Ugh. Heâs gotta know those glasses are so unfair. Theyâve gotten you repeatedly before, and theyâre certainly getting you now.Â
But you canât help but deflate at the cuts behind those rims, while knowing there are even more bruises hiding underneath his oversized tee. How is Yoongi cooking right now? How is he even awake? âSame.âÂ
âGood.âÂ
These instant, deep shivers at his deeper morning voice will never, ever go away. But anything you wanna do about them isnât important right now. Right now, you need to make sure Yoongi is either okay, or finds a way to get better.Â
Sliding your hands down the slopes of his chest, you delicately rest one on his ribs. âDoes it still hurt?âÂ
Yikes. That wince is enough. But Yoongi doesnât shy away from your touch, and you appreciate the way he stays honest. âItâs sore. But I should be good.â
âYou gonna get it checked?â
Thereâs a slight upward tilt of his lips. âNot right now.â At least the honesty persists, as much as you donât want him following the typical manly response to hospital visits. âBut I will if you want me to.â
âPlease go,â you gently urge, lest you disturb the soft morning dew before it melts with the sunrise. âFor me?â
Only sizzles from the stove fill the space until Yoongi nods, and his voice is just as low and tender, âIâll go after work.â
Oh. âYouâre working today?â
Just like breakfast, you didnât expect this, either. Frankly, you figured neither of you were gonna even think about work, much less go. Sure, heâs due a hospital visit and you owe some friends immediate explanations for your absence. But other than that, shouldnât Yoongi be resting?Â
Does his craft truly mean that much?Â
Well, shit. You gotta respect his work ethic, thatâs for damn sure. Because you would sequester yourself to your bedroom and have endless dates with your television if you were sporting a good jab or two. This music thing must mean more to Yoongi than you previously thought. And who are you to step on that dream?Â
Suddenly, all thoughts and concerns flee from the kiss on your cheek.Â
âIâll stay if you stay,â he says, turning to move the pan and scrunching his face with a grunt. Fuck.Â
âIâŠâ Shit, you were gonna go back to the house anyway. And from Yoongiâs smartass smirk, you can tell he already knew that. âJust need to check on him, too. And he doesnât have a car right now, so. I should at least give him a ride.âÂ
âFigured.â In a move so domestic your head spins, Yoongi turns your body and gently pats your butt. âNow go sit. Letâs eat and figure this out.âÂ
â
â
As you devour a flawless meal and clean your dishes, you plan out the day. Youâll head home and check on your brother while Yoongi heads to the studio, and then youâll rendezvous with your friends to hang out until heâs done with work. Theyâre already lighting up your phone like no oneâs businessâespecially Yuri.Â
Yoongi flicks the sink off before you both head to his bedroom, and you melt at the way he slowly wraps his arms around your front halfway there, all four of your legs slowing to close the rest of the distance.Â
Whatâs he doing? This is joyfully new, but you have a pretty tight deadline. Warming his forearm and your own cheeks, you chuckle out, âWe have to hustle, old man.âÂ
âYou hustle me all the time,â he accuses into your shoulder blade, kissing its ridge and making you reconsider walking out the door entirely. âLemme have this.âÂ
Your second laugh is more subdued, and youâre right between his bed and desk when you lift both hands to hold him close. âYou have everything I got,â you wisp into his skin, planting your lips once, twice before you feel his arms press further in. âSo this is nothing.âÂ
Seconds and silence slide by, the delicate veil of early morning still hovering around the room. When Yoongi doesnât say anything, you make to turn and face him.Â
But youâre stopped before your heart skips.Â
âI could stay like this all day,â he admits, voice so low it rumbles through your bones. âAnd itâd be perfect.âÂ
âWhat, you donât wanna see my face?â You joke with a giggle. âRude, but thatâs fine.âÂ
Yoongi only buries his nose further, his glasses sliding against your skin peeking from his shirt. âIâm much braver right here, doll.âÂ
Oh.Â
The leap your heart does is more of a dive, plummeting into the seafoam swirling around your feet. All the words you want to respond with jump off right after, leaving you with nothing but the clouds in your eyes.Â
You donât quite know what he means by that. But it feels like those six words hold the weight of a thousand, so you simply let another kiss on his smooth forearm linger. âDo you want me to go with you?âÂ
A puff of laughter warms you right through and, despite his earlier admission, Yoongi does slowly spin you around.Â
And when you follow, you realize youâre much braver when you arenât facing him, too.Â
âItâs not that, babe,â he says through a dashing curve. âBut the offer was cute.âÂ
âI take it back then.âÂ
âDamn!âÂ
Both of your laughs whoosh out and collide, sweeping as Yoongi pinches your side and you flinch towards the bed. âYou fuckerâ!â
Before you know it, your back hits a comforter before a weight presses your stomach, emotions clashing as youâre elated and shy and immediately concerned for your boyfriendâs side. âBaby, be carefulââ
Lips capture yours, sucking up your warning before a hand slides under your head. Sighing, you arch into his chest, feeling the weight of his chains slip across your breasts.Â
Euphoria isnât an adequate enough word to describe how you feel. Where there used to be flutters in your ribcage now reside strong, powerful wing beats, gusts of want and desire lifting you off the ground and launching you into clear skies. Starlight of every color exists within each kiss you share, and your fingers feebly grab his tee to keep you from falling back down to earth.Â
âIf we donât go now,â Yoongi rasps before sliding his mouth against yours, âWeâre never going anywhere again.âÂ
âI know,â you whisper, willingly letting him kiss you once more, âIs that a promise?âÂ
âFuck, I wish.âÂ
You do, too. But you know youâre running out of time for what you need to do. And werenât you just saying you had to respect his aspirations? Shit, you really do need to snap out of it. âCome on,â you order with a pat to his chest. âWe have all week to do this. We got time.âÂ
Turns out, youâre still amongst the heavens. The way Yoongiâs looking at you? This is the closest youâll ever get to being held by an angel.Â
Did he get more handsome overnight? Or is it the light in his eyes sustained since his confession in the kitchen? You donât quite know, and you may never pinpoint why, but the tug he has on your heart spans space and time.Â
And youâll run through both forever to keep meeting him again and again.Â
Burns prick your eyes, but he mercifully stands before he can catch any evidence of your yearning.Â
Just like that, the two of you bounce back to getting ready, with him sliding notebooks and headphones in a backpack while you change into your own clothes. As you sling your bag over a shoulder, he reaches for the closest hoodie, and you wordlessly make your way to the front door.Â
You really do hope he gets looked at today. But just like the calm after a storm, you want to encourage him gently rather than shove him out. At least he seems receptive to your gentle suggestions.
But after you ask one more time and he simply nods, you lower your eyes to his kicks. âSorry if Iâm nagging. Iâd just worry less if you went right away, thatâs all.â
âYou arenât nagging, babe.â Your freshly bloomed lover reaches out to hold your wrist, smoothing a rough thumb over your skin. Fucking hell, you canât help but frown at the gashes and cuts marring his knuckles. âIâll go as soon as I can.â
Not just his hands, but his face. His ribs. And maybe other places you havenât even seen yet.Â
You donât wanna leave his side.Â
But you have to head out before your brother leaves. Things need to get patched up before he flies out into more stress, and you owe him an apology for walking out when he was still aching. Based on Yoongiâs physical state? Your brother could be hiding some big wounds and you didnât even wanna talk to him.Â
However. Was last night necessary? Absolutely. You cannot entertain the possible outcomes had you not tried hard enough to get through Yoongiâs door. His eyes were so dulled, his hands felt so cold. What would have happened if you didnât force yourself inside?Â
Why was that guitar smashed to pieces?Â
This is also why you refuse to leave. So many questions, so many things you still donât know. Like what all happened when you were separated? And how in the hell is this man in love with you?
âI donât wanna go,â you confess, instantly encased in his arms and warmth. âIâd much rather keep kissing you.âÂ
âTrue,â he says with a resigned huff, shifting his glasses with an adorable nose scrunch. If only he didnât have so many little red lines of conflict on his face. âBut we both have stuff to take care of, so letâs get all that done first.â
âUgh, fine.â Your groan is more teasing than serious, and Yoongiâs laugh is nothing but understanding.Â
Damn. You still feel it. You really donât wanna go. Be it the rawness of last night still on your skin, or the confessions still on your tongues, you just wanna stay by his side. âSorry,â you breathe out, lacing your fingers to pepper love along his strong, reddened ridges. âIâm serious. I donât wanna leave you right now.â
Walking out of Yoongiâs door just doesnât feel right. Even if heâs right there and will be following you out. Is this feeling normal? Are you supposed to feel this tightly woven to someone? Because the stitching between your hearts has only gotten stronger in the tempest of last night, as if you bonded together just to hold on for dear life.Â
Maybe thatâs exactly what happened. And itâs exactly why you can barely take one step out of his place.Â
âThen donât.â
Not one second passes before your chin is held, and lips slide so tenderly across yours that they may as well melt into your touch. Your reaction is quickly swooped into his mouth, and everything falls away as you let him seize your every thought. Lightning from last night zips out of your limbs, your toes, your fingers clasping his loose tee.Â
You might just cry where you stand.
How have his kisses gotten even better? How have you never felt this way even though youâve done this far more times than you were ever supposed to? It should be impossible, and yet, this man finds even more ways to astound you.Â
Yoongi slips a hand over your cheek, giving one more beautiful push of his lips as he confesses, âI donât wanna leave you, either.âÂ
And your breath stutters onto his features. âYou, too?â
Slow, he kisses your cheek, the clear rim of his specs skimming your nose. When he draws back, you look right into his eyes, wondering why heâs watching your mouth instead.Â
âMe, too.â Yoongi kisses your other side with a quiet peck. âFuck, me, too.âÂ
You fucking hate what you have to do, but you donât have a choice.Â
With one last lingering kiss, you both gather enough courage to set out and do what you must.Â
â
â
Your house is already a flurry of activity as you enter to see your brother in the kitchen, packing his leather duffle thatâs a constant companion on his trips.Â
Of course. The memory of him purchasing the lavish accessory pops into your head every time you watch him scurry around, dimples ever present on his proud cheeks. Itâs almost enough to make you smile yet again.Â
But you canât when the same face is currently scratched to hell. Just like Yoongiâs, if not worse.Â
Fuck, is he really gonna travel looking like that?Â
âHey,â he rasps out, still fighting off slumber. âYouâre back earlier than I thought.âÂ
âWanted to check on you before we left.â Fuck, your voice sounds like itâs being forced through a clogged pipe. Loosen the hell up! âAnd dude. Put some bandaids on, yeah?âÂ
âYeah, just give me a sec. Making sure I have everything before my ride gets here.âÂ
âHuh?â He got a ride? Youâre here now so you can take him to the airport. âYou sure you donât need me to drive you?âÂ
âYeah, itâs all good. I didnât know you were coming back.âÂ
Shit. His body seems just as angular as it did last night. Which, quite frankly, could still be from what went down in the lot.Â
Because even though you see both men banged up, you suddenly realize you donât actually know what all transpired.Â
After all, there wasnât much talk of it after you walked into the tempest of Yoongiâs living room.
Of course, you arenât gonna bring it up just this second. There are other things to ask about and make sure of first. âWallet? Phone? Passport?âÂ
âYup, yup, uhh.. Yup.âÂ
Zippers sling in the quiet morning air as you continue, âAnd youâre coming back on Friday, right?â
âOh.. Nah.â When you start crossing the kitchen, your brother hauls his leather bag over his better shoulder. Honestly, no one would be able to tell the other oneâs bruised with his suit on. That thing damn well covers everything except the cuts on his face and hands. âSaturday.âÂ
You pause in your journey to the medicine cabinet. âWait.. Saturday? The release partyâs on Friday.â
âYeah.. I know.â
What the fuck? Thatâs bullshit theyâre keeping him longer than they have to. Struggling to understand how corporate can keep your brother on a leash and get away with it, you urge, âTell them to at least let you go home a day early. Donât you wanna support your friends?â
âYou mean Yoongi?â
A zing of terror zips through your eyes, freezing every vein in an instant.Â
The fuck was that question? Never mind. Stay calm stay calm stay fucking calm. âUhh, yeah, heâs one of them? But the other guys, too, right? I know you care about them and this is huge.â
Mercifully, your sibling just shakes his head and waves you off. âDonât you think I already tried? I donât wanna miss it but I donât have a choice. Conference schedule is pretty tight and Iâm heading the panel on Friday.â
âIs it in the morning? You can fly out afterââ
âWhy are you fighting so hard?â
âWhy arenât you fighting harder!â
Okay, what in the hell is happening right now? Screw optics and how this must look for you, your brother needs to be there. Him and Yoongi are the tightest of friends, the most ride or die duo youâve ever seen. You canât picture a timeline where he misses this monumental moment, and itâs starting to really upset you that heâs barely trying.Â
âAlright, you know what?â Hard steps surge forward as you stand rigid, a duffle hastily dumped onto tile. âYou donât know what Iâve tried. You donât even know if I even told him yet.â
Fucking shit. You hold his stare before turning away, tossing out the idea of bandages entirely and searing footsteps into the hallwayâ
âOr do you.â
Before icing over with the unforgiving frost of zero gravity space.Â
Slow, you turn, not quite facing him but not backing down, either. ââŠExcuse me?â
âYou heard me. You talkinâ? What else has he been doing to you?â
Oh. Fuck that.Â
Doing to you?Â
Fuck all of this. This is too much to handle right now and you know youâre gonna snap if he keeps pushing because you are not having this conversation right before he leaves. Youâve already thought about this before, right? You cannot fuck with his head right before business trips because he needs to be on and locked in.Â
But now heâs fucking with your temper and those are some choice fucking words pulled out of his ass.Â
You donât think youâve ever legitimately threatened this man to his face and meant it before, and it tears a sharp corner of your heart, âYou better be very careful. With whatever you wanna say next.â
The air proves too thick to slice. While your body stands aflame, your brother is iced over, brimming with an energy that damn near takes physical form. âAll Iâm saying is? I find out some fucking bullshit is going onââ
No no no, not now.
Reacting fast is your only instinct, brain haywire and fizzling fizzling boiling. Harsh, you spin on your heel and shout the first thing you can think of, âOh, come onââ
âYou better hope to god youâre ready for whatâs comingââ
âStop!â Fuck fuck fuck, this is so frustrating because your head is exploding and your body is screaming to just tell him already. Fuck the consequences at this point this is ludicrous.Â
Doing to you? Yoongi? How dare he speak about his best friend like that how dare he accuse him without outright saying the words all you have to do is tell your brother how wrong heâs got it.Â
But you canât be the one. Yoongi said he would, and he probably took months to get to that point of strengthâand healing, from what you can tell.Â
This is between them. Them. You have to honor that, as much as you wanna just confess everything now and deal with it yourself.Â
But goddamn your brother is pulsing with anger and itâs leaking into your own charged air.Â
What does he think is happening? Does he think Yoongiâs just, what, playing you? Heâs wrong. Heâs so wrong. Yoongiâs been nothing but the best thing thatâs ever happened to you and shit your heart hurts becauseâŠ
Your brother is valid in thinking that.Â
How foolish. Didnât you guard your heart from Yoongi for the longest? Didnât everything start because you figured you knew who he was because of his reputation? You got him all wrong, too. So how can you be mad at your brother for doing the same?Â
Fuck, think. Just think before someone gets hurt.Â
Because if you arenât careful, someoneâor multiple someonesâwill get hurt in seconds. You have to bear the pain alone right now. To protect them both, you have to keep your trembling mouth shut.Â
And? You have to admit that something isnât fair here. Not to you, not to Yoongi, but to him. Last night was rough as fuck but, while you both got to have raw, beautiful closure, the one standing in front of you had to go to sleep in an empty house.Â
So chill the fuck out.Â
Breathing to cool down, you tense and loosen, tense and loosen. âI get it. Youâre angry, and you have a lot going on. But,â you bite down on your lip to keep going. âWeâre talking about something else. Weâre talking about you, and Iâm still pissed you even let those guys goad you into a fight. What are we, twelve?â
Seething, your sibling takes the switch of pace. But it is not what you want to hear. âAre you seriâ? What the hell was I supposed to do? That son of a bitch grabbed youââ
âI know,â you recoil. âDonât tell me like you were there, because you werenât.â
Finallyâfinallyâthose angry lines in his face vanish.Â
But they make way for something much worse than anger. Because your older brother, someone thatâs been there for you your whole life..Â
Looks absolutely stricken over the one time he wasnât.Â
Damn it.Â
Regretful, you drop your shoulders in exhaustion and quiet compromise. When you continue, your voice is much softer, âBut I told you: they were. Your friends, they were there because they knew you wanted that. Jimin got me away, Yoongi took me home and stayed.âÂ
You really have got to stop saying his name like you love him. It could start becoming too obvious.Â
Shuddering, you shift your weight, folding your arms and shrinking into yourself.Â
That night, despite Yoongiâs best and most gentle efforts, still clings to where that loser touched you at Dalo. You hate that you havenât gotten over it, and you loathe the way you still rub over the same spot. Over, and over. âWhat did you want him to do? Leave me here?â
âNo.âÂ
âExactly. And he didnât.â You adjust your stance again, making an impromptu gamble as you decide to let some truth leak out. Because your brother is owed at least this much. âAnd fine, you wanna know something? We do talk more because of it.â
Your brotherâs head snaps up, and you brace. Because if you show any shred of weakness or hesitation, heâll see right through your weak attempt to hide most of the truth,Â
âBut donât ever accuse him of doing anything to me. That was fucked up to say and you know it.â
âFuck.â In agreement, he rubs his hair back. âIt was. Iâm sorry.âÂ
âTrust me,â you swallow, hating that this is how things have to be for now. âYou have nothing to worry about. Heâs never.. Never done anything to me, anyway.âÂ
Itâs not a lie. Everything heâs done has been with you. For you. Because of you.Â
But your heartâs in anguish as it sinks. Because that expression on your older siblingâs face can only be one thing. Â
Pure. Utter. Relief.
Fire singes your eyes before you can quell the flame. Itâs the hardest technical truth to swallow.Â
Sure, he doesnât have anything to worry about as far as you being safe. And on top of that, he doesnât have to worry about any fake shit because Yoongi confessed to you last night.
But as far as his best friend sleeping with and now dating his sister behind his back? That is still very much sitting right in the center of the table.Â
And now youâre starting to see just how fucked all three of you are as soon as you sit down to eat the truth.Â
But Yoongi said heâd be the one to tell, so he will.Â
This feeling is so fucking miserable, though.Â
In the end, your brother is effectively convinced, raking a hand across his head and sighing. âJimin told me what all went down at Dalo, I just⊠Last night was⊠Fucked up.âÂ
âWell, yeah.â
âNo. See, this is just like what you said to me. You canât say it like you were there.â
Itâs your stomachâs turn to twist. âSo? You were scratched and bruised to hell, and YâŠâ Shut up, shut up. Youâre not supposed to know about the state of anyone else. âAnd you were⊠quieter.â
âBecause of what happened, dude.â
You blink. âWhat⊠What happened?â
Your brother looks at youâreally looks at you.Â
And suddenly, your gut flares in terror, storming in an instant across your abdomen.Â
âThat bitch pulled something on us.â
Your heart.Â
Itâs in freefall.
âWait⊠What?â You canât even form more than one syllable at a time, your legs turning gelatinous and knees starting to give out. âNo⊠What are youâŠ?â
What the fuck did he just say? That bitch pulled a what?Â
Your sibling slowly walks toward you once again, watching like heâs just waiting for you to say anything. Do anything.Â
But youâre a complete statue because all you can think about is the horror of something happening and the relief that nothing happened all at once.Â
Was Yoongi too scared to mention that part? Is this why he was holding back and shaking every time he reached out to touch you? Even this morning, he was soâŠÂ
Youâve never seen him like that. Is this why?Â
Your mind is swirling and crashing, overlapping each passing thought and scream running through your head. âIâm so sorry,â you hitch out, âI didnât know. Why didnât you say anything?â
âDidnât wanna scare you,â he sighs out. Putting both hands on his hips, your brother stops feet away, visibly still shook as he pierces wooden planks with his stare. âBut he pulled it right before Yoongi⊠and if it werenâtâŠFuck.âÂ
Burns flare and slice through your eyes when he has to pause. What is he trying to say? Pulled what?Â
Before Yoongi what?Â
Your brother continues, and your throat tightens. âIf it werenât for some random ass sirens, I⊠Things couldâve been so different.âÂ
What the fuck is happening. What the hell are you hearing?Â
âIt was probably dumb as fuck. But I was so fucking angry,â he grits out, watery eyes crushed looking your way. âSo fucking mad at how he was talking about you, I.. Walked right up to him and told him to fuck off.â
You canât even breathe.Â
âI still feel it,â he quietly adds, fingers pressed against his side. âRight here.âÂ
âFuck,â you finally choke out, eyes on fucking fire.Â
âBut all I knew was to keep you all safe,â he says, with hardened resolve and a wobbly chin. âAnd thatâs exactly what I did. I did that shit, even if that meantââÂ
Tears fling out of your eyes, flowing hot down your cheeks because you wouldnât want any of them to go out that way. Nothing happened nothing happened nothing happened and yet your body is acting as if something did and it hurts.Â
Your brother is there as soon as you crumple forward, letting you bury your head in his chest and sob your heart out. For him, for his friends, and for all the time you had with the man you love so, so dearly.Â
If anything happened to your brother before you came clean⊠If anything happened before you and Yoongi could evenâŠÂ
Suddenly, you feel equal weights of guilt. For running out on your brother. And for almost walking out on Yoongi.Â
You decide an apology is in order for both of them, and all the understanding in the world for Yoongiâs frosted demeanor as soon as you get him alone again.
And you are one hundred percent going to tell your brother everything once heâs back.Â
The tears cannot stop, and youâre sure you are crying unimpeded in a pressed and primmed suit. âIâm so sorry,â you keep repenting like a prayer. âThis is all my fault.â
âNoââ
âYou almostââ
âHey, stop.â He yanks you back, both of your faces soaked with saltwater. âWhat did I say before? I threw the first swing. You didnât do anything wrong.â
âBut it led to all this, I just.. I just feel so fucking stupid.â
âDonât. Hey, look at me.â Firm but gentle, he holds you at armâs length, forcing you to face him. âMaybe weâre both stupid, but you werenât the idiot. I was.âÂ
You feel so many conflicting things in your soul.Â
What would you have done if Yoongi was in critical condition? What would you have done differently if your brother was instead? Are they the same? Are the two situations really so different anymore?Â
No they arenât they arenât they arenât.Â
âPlease donât do that again,â you shake out. âEven if it was for me, if I ever lost you, I...âÂ
âYou know I canât promise anything.â He furrows his brows when you eye him with anger and sadness. âBut nothing like that is happening again. Especially with the same dudes.âÂ
âOkay.âÂ
A vicious tornado of emotions sends your whole body into agonizing pain. This isnât what you expected at all, and itâs causing your limbs to lock at the bends. Too many scenarios are jangling about yet you canât ask for specifics because that will just make it even more real.Â
A nightmare is somehow better once you know it ends with you waking up. âIâm⊠gonna need some time to process everything.â
âI know. And I wasnât planning on saying anything, but⊠You deserve to know the things I get into.âÂ
Ah.Â
The irony is not lost on you.Â
âAt least, if they involve you. We learned our lesson. You were right to tell us off.â
God. You feel numb.Â
âThanks,â you murmur, suddenly immensely tired. âI think I need more sleep.â
A blaring honk sounds outside the house, and you both flinch at the noise.Â
And your throat burns at the way your brother instinctively swept you behind his back.Â
When you realize what it is, you know what has to come next.Â
And heâs the first to react as he turns to face you again, âAlright. Iâm heading out, just remember to go get my baby when sheâs fixed, yeah?â
âDo you have to go?â
Wait.
The question seems to startle him as much as it does you.Â
How did you blurt it right out before even registering the words? Why does your heart clench at the sight of those eyes looking so pained?Â
Why does everything feel so shaky within these walls that were always your home?
âI do,â he says, voice tight. âIâm sorry.âÂ
And why the fuck do you feel sad heâs leaving?
âNo, no, itâs.. Of course you have to.â You canât help the lump in your throat from bobbing, the regret in your limbs as they barely move at your side. âI dunno why I asked, I guess I just..âÂ
Thereâs no response to your sniffle.Â
âSorry for yelling,â you squeak out. âI just feel really queasy.â
For a lot more reasons than one.
âWe all made it out,â your brother whispers. âThatâs what matters.â
âWill you⊠Will you at least try to be back for the party?â
The man swallows with his brows knit tight, then attempts to crack the tiniest smile. âYou know I will. Thatâs my guy.âÂ
âOkay.â You nod, sniffling again. After what he just told you? You know heâll do anything for the ones he loves. âSee you there.â
Your brother rubs a comforting palm over your head before turning, heading for the door and grabbing his leather duffle.Â
When he stops to glance at you one more time, you give a little wave of your hand before watching the door click shut.Â
Chest caving as you collapse to the ground in tears.Â
â
â
The need to call Yoongi burns so harshly your fingers damn near set your top aflame.
But heâs at work, and you canât fuck things up right when youâre approaching the finish line. You almost did with your brother, and that gave you twelve heart attacks in the span of minutes.Â
Still. Your chest aches so much that a thirteenth could very well be approaching. You donât even realize youâre bracing the hallway wall for support until you try to stand, back sore and aching from bending so far for so long.Â
What did your brother mean to say about Yoongi? What did that coward pull on them? Do you even want to know what happened?Â
Fighting back tears, you reach down for your phone, shakily typing out a message only to erase it. Then again. And again.Â
And again.Â
Giving up, you forcefully swallow all your worries, cringing at the bitterness of the unknown and the burnt molasses of hidden truths.Â
Itâs going to be okay. No matter what you think or imagine in your head, they made it out, they made it out, they are all alive.Â
Thatâs the only reason you can move forward, each step getting you from your room. To your bathroom.Â
And back again.Â
â
â
After showering, you feel lighter and refreshed, though the soreness between your legs has yet to leave.Â
But you wouldnât want it any other way, as itâs another reminder of Yoongiâs apparent brush with survival. His broken living room spurned the creation of your bond, your devotion to him as he confessed before you gave him your utmost trust in his sheets.Â
The end is so close. As soon as this week is over, youâll rip the last bit of peel from your pair of tangerines, baring all truths to your brother and facing the consequences.Â
Finally ready, you head to your car, opening your text threads with a plan: start slow.Â
Start with something that can be interpreted neutrally if anyone saw it on his phone screen, especially if your headstrong ex is in the room.Â
You [12:31pm]: how are you feeling?
Yoongi [12:34pm]: 1 AttachmentÂ
You close your door with brows furrowed.Â
Yoongiâs at the hospital?Â
Thatâs not what you expected at all.Â
Your chest swells with relief knowing heâs there, but you also wanna make sure heâs feeling okay. Especially his mental state after whatever the fuck your brother just dropped on you before leaving.Â
Goddamn, thatâs going to gnaw at your brain until you find the right time and right amount of courage to ask about it. Because itâs very possible Yoongi wonât tell you.Â
Because itâs probably something he knows you wonât like.Â
Fuck.Â
You [12:34pm]: Loved an Attachment
You [12:34pm]: thank you for listeningđ€ still sore?
Yoongi [12:35pm]: Yeah, but not bad. Just there.
Wait. Heâs not at the studio. That means you canâ
Yoongi: Outgoing Call
âHey.â
âHey,â you slowly say as you pull out into the street. âIâm driving now so this is easier.â
âCourse. You going to Taeâs?â
âMaybe. Iâm going to Yuriâs first.â You swallow, realizing that you didnât tell him about what you let slip before driving over. âI.. Told her. About you.â
Thereâs a little bit of silence on the line, just some adjustments and muffled speaker sounds. âSorry, just writing this down. Whatâs wrong with that?â
You huff through your nose. Gotta be those patient forms that always take forever to fill out. âOh. Just more and more people knowing, is all.âÂ
âEveryoneâs gonna know eventually.âÂ
You hold back a small smile. Because heâs right. âYeah. Iâm just tired of this feeling.â
âLike youâre hiding something.â
Itâs your turn for silence. He doesnât know how accurately that was played out today. The only answer you can provide is a curt, âExactly.â
âSame.â
Wings beat around your heart again.Â
He wants this. Yoongi really, really wants this. And years ago, that outcome wouldnât have even crossed your mind as an option.Â
âThank you for going, baby.â
âThe guys made me.â
You hum. âWhich ones.â
After a pause, you hear a puff of amusement. âAll of them at some point today, actually.âÂ
All of them? Does that include your brother? Did they talk about the trip already?
Your laugh is bittersweet. âWell. Glad to know you can be forced by everyone else except me.â
âHey, I was already gonna go because of you!â Yoongi quietly retorts, and you giggle at the pout in his words. âJust wanted to get a headstart on work first.â
You were right. He really does wanna go all out for his musical endeavors.Â
Itâs extremely admirable, and wildly attractive, but it does come to a point. âAs much as I love your passion, old man, I wanna keep you upright.â
He laughs soft into the line, and you think you can listen to that specific sound on an infinite loop. âThatâs fair.âÂ
âHow long is it gonna take, you think?â
âDunno. But Iâll keep myself busy until Iâm out.â
Of course he will. You donât doubt he wonât waste any time. Didnât he bring journals in his backpack? You wouldnât be surprised if he wrote ten thousand songs before being called in. âJust call me if you need anything, please?â
âOf course, babe.â
âThank you,â you say with utmost sincerity. âIf only my brother would be less stubborn and get checked, too.â
âHeâll probably do it once he gets there.â
âDid you convince him?â
âNah. But once he knows I did, heâll do it.â
âFigures.â You scoff. âOkay, Iâm almost there. Let me know how it goes.â
âK. Bye, doll.â
You didnât ask him what went down. But itâs not the time nor place, and you have plenty of chances this week to figure out when that would beâif at all.Â
âTalk soon.âÂ
â
â
For a normally bustling household, Yuriâs house is quiet.Â
So itâs not shocking when you walk into the kitchen and see all your friends glance your way, slowly vacating their chairs with eyes never leaving your face. Even Reia is on high alert.Â
Did Yuri tell her? Did Yuri tell anyone else?Â
No. Sheâs a talker and loves spilling, but she promised. And when she promises something, you know you can trust her to keep it.Â
Itâs what pours emotion in your voice as you meekly greet, âHey, guysââ
A crushing hug closes your throat. Yuriâs the one that gets to you first, with Reia and Dominique waiting their turns to offer you healing, relieved embraces.Â
âWhat happened?âÂ
âScared us half to death.â
Dom puts you at armâs length to give a once over, noting your face rubbed raw and eyes still a little bloodshot. Thankfully, her pupils hold more concern than disappointment. âYou good?â
Your eyes wobble alongside your smile, and you think itâs enough proof. âMore than that,â you still decide to whisper, and your heart beats again at her reaction.Â
âThank god. I was ready to kick your ass if you werenât.â
Heading up to Yuriâs room, you all wait until the door is swung back before mounting her canopy bed, sitting in a tight circle as you divulge everything.Â
Well. Almost everything.Â
You tell them that Yoongi is the one youâve been seeing, how you went to check on him last night in a panic, and the terrifying reason why. When you mention the fight after the basketball game, all three of your friends erupt in questions, and you have to assure them everything turned out okay. Honestly, you also do this to assure yourself, too.Â
âSo⊠Your brotherâs just fine with all of this?â Reia asks, not noticing the tick of Domâs jaw.Â
âWell,â you start with a higher pitch, earning a pair of groans. âHe doesnât exactly know yetââ
âYup. Heâs gonna murder him.â
âYeah, should we say our condolences now or..â
âHow long has this been going on?â Reia fires off another question that digs into your chest. âWas he the one you were seeing the whole time?â
âYes,â you admit with a sigh. âI shouldâve told you guys from the beginning, but. The whole thing just felt so delicate. But! We just started making things official recently, so..âÂ
Dom turns your way. âOfficial how?â
Well. Here goes everything.Â
With a shaky breath, and lingering feelings from the time it happened, you reveal with watery eyes, âYoongi⊠Told me he loves me.â
Both Yuri and Reia react in yelps, Domâs gaze lowering as the girls reach to grab your hands.Â
Wait. Whatâs going on with her? Sheâs the one that knows the most, sheâs the one that covered for you all those months ago. She has to be the one that is the least surprised at all this.Â
Blinking, you note to confront her about it later. Right now, youâre too focused on trying not to cry as your friends tumble out questions and support,Â
âHe said it? Did you say it first or did he?âÂ
âHow did it happen! Oh, Iâm so happy for you, babeââÂ
âThankâthank you, Yuri,â you squeeze out as she hugs you close. âI couldnât believe it, but he just.. Said it. We werenât even doing anything, I was just.. Looking up what injuries he could have..âÂ
And he confessed in the most Yoongi fashion he could have.Â
Looking back, it shouldnât shock you at all. Heâs always found ways to sweep you off your proverbial feet, so why would a confession plucked from the heavens be any different?Â
She lets you go before wiping her eyes, Reia and even Dom now sporting watery pupils, too.Â
âAs much as Iâm upset at you for not telling us, Iâve never been so happy for you.â When Yuriâs features crease in another sob, you sniffle along with the rest. âItâs been so long since you⊠And you really.. Fuck.âÂ
You know what sheâs trying to say, and the realization has your throat constricting so tight.Â
Itâs been forever since youâve had something like this, someone like this. When you and Jungkook were together, you told him that you loved him before he broke it off.Â
Sure, you bought the rings together, but he never uttered those words until years after when it didnât even matter. And all your relationships after his were complete and utter bullshit, so you donât think you ever even heard those three words and knew them to be true.Â
Yoongi was the first to ever say them so sincerely.Â
And that fact makes your ducts burn and burn.Â
And when Yuri finally speaks, it breaks the dam holding your real deluge back,Â
âI canât think of anyone else that deserves to be loved more than you.âÂ
All at once, everything streams out as you hunch forward. The pain of everything youâve endured, the hopelessness of knowing youâd most likely end up alone, the excruciating prospect of a future that you never deemed bright, or peaceful, or comforting.Â
And to think that even this man couldâve been snatched away from you in a snap? Even more tears overlap with the ones youâre shedding, and you canât even reach out to hug all three beautiful, angelic souls surrounding you with tight arms and sobs because your limbs lock at all bends.Â
Itâs the exact release you need. All your friends supporting you, all the pent up anxiety of last night and today, the truth setting itself free in some capacityâall in the comfort of a plushie-laden bed you only doubted yourself in last time.Â
Everythingâs gonna be alright. It has to be. Youâre gonna fight for the ones you love, even if a war between them is inevitable.Â
It takes a few minutes of heavy silence for you all to separate, swiping and rubbing tears while letting out happy sniffles.Â
When you thank them for being understanding, they assure you itâs okay. And when you say youâre going to tell your brother soon, a force from the doorway has all of you leaping from lilac sheets,Â
âTell him what?âÂ
Jia stands firm with a laundry basket at her hip, and Yuri scoffs at her older sister for barging in. âA knock wouldâve been nice!âÂ
Fuck!Â
You canât tell Jia of all people. If you spill anything about Yoongi, sheâs one hundred percent going to tell your brother. Theyâre the same age, and run in pretty tight circles, so of course you are not going to risk it.Â
But you can tell her something else youâre going to tell your older sibling, so you fire out a half-truth,Â
âTell him not to pick any other fights that could get him killed.âÂ
Jiaâs eyes zoom to your wrecked face, and she drops the laundry with haste before asking, âWhat happened? When? Tell me now.âÂ
Huh. Maybe your brother has a type, if heâs still into Jia like he said before.Â
You feel a little spark in your chest as you let her know they all got in a scuffle after the basketball game, and another pang as she immediately abandons the room and clothes with a fierce declaration,Â
âIâm gonna kill them myself!âÂ
âDonât worry, I already hounded my brother!â You call out after her, sighing as Yuri shakes her head with a smile. âShe gets like that when sheâs really worried, huh.âÂ
âYeah..â Your friend leans to look around you, noticing the basket left alone on the ground. âAnd if sheâs super fired up, she drops everything and doesnât stop until itâs handled. Clearly.âÂ
Maybe both older siblings really are similar.Â
The firestorm of an interruption seemed to break the tension in the room, with all of you finally relaxing and catching up. When they ask you questions, you answer what you can.Â
And when you divulge information that has your ears burning, their squeals and yells give you whole new reasons to live.Â
â
â
After a very comforting lunch Yuriâs mom cooked, you head to the bathroom when your phone suddenly vibrates through your palm.
Huh? Thatâs weird. You expect the name on your screen to be Taehyung, not Yoongi.Â
Not that itâs a bad thing. Youâve been waiting to hear from him, so this is a pleasant surprise.Â
Closing the door to the guest bathroom, you gaze at the calming sage decor with a smile. âHi, how did itââ
âYouâre coming over later, right?â
Oh, shit. Is he okay?
âYes, baby,â you respond with a soothing lilt, ears perked and body on high alert.Â
Does he think you arenât anymore? You both decided on the plans earlier. Surely he knows youâd never just flake on him. âIâm coming back once youâre done with work, remember?â
Thereâs an uncomfortable pause on the line, which makes your boyfriendâs next question jab you so far in the lungs you canât breathe,
ââŠCan it be now?â
Shit.Â
Just like Jia earlier, you drop every plan you have to the wayside. Youâre sure that Taehyung will understand, and you already got through the biggest conversation you needed to with your friends.Â
âOf course,â you whoosh out. âLemme just say bye and Iâll go.âÂ
âTake your time.â A small shuffling interrupts. âItâll take me a bit to get back.âÂ
âOkay. See you there.âÂ
The strained urgency in his voice makes your hair stand on end, so you vacate the bathroom to inform the girls that you gotta goâbut not without a quick head tilt towards Dom, who follows you outside and into the afternoon sun. Â
â
â
You wait until youâre next to your car on the street, turning with a concerned expression and jittery nerves, âWhatâs up with you? Did I do something wrong?â
Turns out, you read Dominique correctly. Her jaw locks before loosening, and it reminds you of the time she confronted you about Yoongi before. God, how much has changed since then. That feels like ages and ages ago.Â
âItâs not about you,â your best friend clears the air and the tightness in your shoulders. âIâm just.. Glad he came around.â
âYoongi?â When Dom nods, you blink. âWait, what?â
âAt your house that night.. After he left your room, we hadâI dunno, a heart-to-heart.â She sighs, flicking braids over her shoulder. You note to compliment the beads she chose this time, because they remind you of summer and simpler times. âI mightâve pressured him a bit, and.. I think he wanted to tell me that he loved you. All the way back then.âÂ
Something in your heart stutters, and you can only repeat your last question, âWhat?â
âYeah. Something about needing to do something first,â she continues, holding your gaze with perfect brows furrowed in sunlight. âBut I could tell he was damn serious about whatever it was. And if he was willing to do it for you? I let it go.âÂ
Your mind whirls.Â
Yoongi was already in love with you back then? Is that why he needed to let you go? To deal with whatever he had to do?Â
One side of you breaks thinking he had to go through all that alone; the other side is screaming at his past self for not even giving you a choice. What did he go through? What did he have to do?
Now you really have to see him. Immediately.Â
âThank you, Dom,â you rush out while opening your door. âIâm just happy itâs over.â
âThe hell itâs not.â Shooting you a glare that heats the oncoming breeze, she reminds, âItâs not over until your brother knows. And based on everything thatâs happened? That conversation is not gonna go over well.âÂ
A dark, simmering boil starts in your stomach, and youâre already feeling queasy again. Tightening your door handle, you gulp hard. âI know.âÂ
âTrust me, Iâm happy for you both. I am.â Both hands find her hips as she levels a gaze that you really, really donât enjoy. âBut Iâm gonna be honest, I think this is gonna ruin their friendship for good.âÂ
Both of your lungs clamp shut.Â
âPlease donât say that,â you beg, âIâm gonna fight for all of us. I will.âÂ
âI donât doubt that, babe. Hey, uh uh, come here.â Reaching out, she gives you a tight hug just when you feel fragile again.Â
âListen to me. I donât doubt that,â she says into your shoulder. âIâm just here to be realistic. Just donât be shocked if thatâs how it goes. Weâll be here for you no matter what, too.âÂ
âOkay,â you say with a scrunched face into her scent. God, she always smells so good, and itâs almost enough to calm you down. Almost almost almost. âThank you. But Iâm not giving up.âÂ
âThatâs my girl.â She squeezes you one more time. âI love you.âÂ
With eyes searing over, you choke and grip her tighter. âI love you, too.âÂ
â
â
Yoongiâs door warms your back as you wait for him to show.Â
But thereâs a good chance it can just be your volcanic anxiety.Â
Ever since your arrival, youâve paced, youâve gnawed on your lips, youâve had to shake the nerves out of your hands.Â
And over and over, youâve strained your neck to look for your favorite cat, because you could sincerely use even a glimpse of her right now.Â
While she doesnât end up showing, Yoongi rounds the nearest corner minutes after your last desperate scan.Â
Fuck, heâs so handsome.Â
Even now, as he simply walks toward you with a backpack slung over his shoulder, you watch with undying yearning to feel those flowing bangs over his forehead. Youâd even settle for a single touch of his cheeks, one of them currently sporting a thin bandage.
But the closer Yoongi gets, the quicker your admiration morphs into concern. Thereâs a deep bend in his brows that you canât decipher, and his fist is balled pretty tight.Â
Seriously, what happened? He looks so troubled that you slowly push off the doorway to ask,Â
âBaby, whatâsââ
A bag hits the ground before youâre swooped into a kiss so electric your lips spark.Â
Him. Him, him, and more him. For the love of everything you donât understand whatâs happening but you kiss Yoongi back with everything you have, arms slinging around his strong shoulders and tugging him closer because he clearly needed this.Â
And fuck if you didnât need it just as much. Screw it if anyone sees you. This is all you want and youâll stay right here until he pulls away.Â
When he finally does, both of you swallow to catch your breaths, and your soul glimmers when his forehead meets yours.Â
âHi, baby,â you whisper to his exhales. âMissed you, too.â
Silent, your lover kisses your forehead before hugging you close, and youâre more sure of your prediction than ever. Something is bothering him.Â
He doesnât look worse, at least. But thereâs clearly something off and heâs not hiding it. His lack of words is loud enough.Â
âLetâs go inside,â you quietly suggest. âI wouldâve gone in already but I donât have a key.â
He nods, fishing out his keyring to let you both inside.Â
When you set your bags down and slip off your shoes, itâs only seconds before youâre softly pulled into a hug again, surprising yet so, so welcoming.Â
Even only after a few hours, youâve missed the fuck out of him. Which makes all of this an outright dream.Â
âSorry,â Yoongi finally murmurs against your shoulder. âI justâŠâ
âNothing to be sorry for.â You stroke a hand along his hair, massaging his scalp and loving how soft it feels. The windswept strands fall back into place as you keep running your fingers through. âDid you at least get your appointment?â
âYeah, I did.â He buries his face further. âNothing bad. Just canât lift anything heavy for a couple days.â
âGood. Thatâs easy to manage,â you whisper back into his tee, feeling the chill of lingering air conditioning and body warmth all at once. âIs something else bothering you?â
âNot exactly.â Whatever that means. âIâll tell you about it later. Just wanted this, and you.â
Oh. ThatâsâŠÂ
âIâm here now, love,â you assure with a melting heart, wondering what happened to cause this behavior.Â
Is it because of last night? Or something that happened today? Youâre anxious all over again, but from the way Yoongiâs acting, your worries are second to his. âHave you eaten yet?â
He shakes his head, only pulling you closer with not a word from his lips.Â
And from this point on, you make a silent vow to yourself. Whatever Yoongi needs, youâre going to take care of him.Â
No matter what, these next few days are all about himâa minuscule sacrifice in comparison to everything heâs done for you, whether you knew about it or not.
âIâll make you something then. Come on.âÂ
When you walk, you slip your hand down his arm to hold his hand, and your lead into his kitchen is short.Â
âAny requests?â You cheerfully ask as you spare a smile over your shoulder. âWe can do⊠Something lightâŠâ
Only to see him staring back with nothing but a lingering sense of longing.
Okay.Â
You need to get to the bottom of this now.Â
Stopping right over linoleum, you leave no room for arguments, âYoongi. Tell me whatâs wrong.â
He blinks before his gaze meets the floor. So youâre confused when he simply, quietly..Â
Laughs?Â
âItâs not that somethingâs wrong,â he slowly starts, a shy smile carving his features. âFor the first time in my life, nothingâs wrong.âÂ
Your heart beats extra loud.Â
âBut itâs too much to explain right now.â His eyes rise to meet yours. âJust know that Iâm so in love with you.âÂ
Oh.
âAnd I want you to know that every day I live.â
Fuck.
Your body responds before you can say anything, lips connecting to remove any need for speech. The knowledge of them all staring death in the face last night makes this confession sear your insides, and you canât help but kiss him like youâll never get to again.Â
Yanking him back, you spin on your heel until he flings into the kitchen, clutching your wrists before gripping your jaw with both hands.Â
His mouth heats on yours, his glasses the only barrier between your skin. Everything sizzles from your head to your toes, and you both bang into a countertop beforeâ
âFuck, ouch.â
âShit, you okay?â
Yoongi rubs his side with one eye pinched shut, a corner of his teeth present. âYeah. Worth it, though.â
âBe serious,â you reprimand. Looks like heâs gonna have to take it easy, which means no going at it like animals until heâs on the mend. âNo more until you feel better, yeah?â
âSays who?â
âBabe.â
His deadly pout almost breaks your resolve. âFine.âÂ
But you can wait. Youâre sure it wonât take long, and for this man? Youâll wait however long you need to.Â
Besides, thereâs plenty of things you can do in the meantime that donât require running into hard objects.Â
âGood. Now letâsâŠâ You turn away to get started before youâre held, and pulled back into yet another embrace.Â
What the hell is happening today? Your lungs and your melting pile of a brain can only take so much. Itâs beautifully overwhelming how Yoongi canât seem to let you go, because youâre the one that always loses control.Â
This whole time, itâs been you that canât hold yourself back.Â
So now? Being on the other side? You donât think you ever want him to restrain himself again.Â
This time, he moves slow. Sensuously slow, and it would occur to you that heâs finding a very cheeky loophole to your plan if you werenât so hazy-eyed.Â
Whatever Yoongiâs doing, you wonât stop him.Â
Your back touches a counter before Yoongi cages you in, and your lips mold together as perfectly as his body does with yours. Your unhurried strokes match his, and your minds communicate without a single word.Â
Thereâs yearning still ever present. But thereâs comfort in abundance, and a whole new level of need.Â
After he pulls away, you can visibly see him drink you in from head to toe.Â
âYou know.. Iâm good holding off on all the other shit.â Pulling you in, his lips curve as he confidently declares, âBut Iâm never gonna stop kissing you.âÂ
His hands, his lips, his words. They all have healing powers, youâre so sure of it. If Yoongi hasnât yet realized his unending pain has blossomed into a safe haven, you need to let him know no matter what,Â
âGood.â
Thereâs still a pining in his eyes, but he lets you free, hand skirting your hip before he walks to his room. âGonna change then Iâll help.âÂ
âYou donât have to, baby,â you say as you struggle to catch your breath. âI got it.âÂ
Three minutes later, heâs chopping an onion anyway.Â
But youâre loving how serene everything feels with the two of you prepping and dicing, thumps of knives on wood intertwining in sound before you laugh at his crying over the pesky vegetable. Maybe if he wore contacts instead of specs, heâd be better off.Â
Not that his choice of eyewear is what youâre complaining about. But those glasses paired with the cream tees heâs been wearing? There will be hell to pay as soon as you get a chance at revenge.Â
Your pot is set to boil for a bit, so you finally rest against the counter and start a timer on his microwave. âGo ahead,â you gesture to your very handsome cooking partner. âYou can sit now.â
âHuh? Weâre not done yet.â
âOh.â Blinking, you tilt your head in confusion because you couldâve sworn you heard him yawn a couple times. âYou arenât tired?â
âI am,â he says before squeezing his eyes, rapid blinks to follow. âBut Iâm fine here.â
You toss and turn the food around, sprinkling a little more seasoning and hearing the bubbles and fizzes. When you stir a little more, a sudden thought occurs, halting your movements and spinning you around,Â
âAre you staying there to watch my ass.â
Yoongiâs slow smile gives everything away, but he also makes up for the blatant staring.Â
âCanât deny thatâs one of the things.â Pushing off the sink, he stands right next to you, slotting a hand behind your neck and angling you for a kiss. âBut I meant it earlier. I justâŠâ
Youâre completely silent as you watch him slide his eyes from your face to the sizzling food. Whatever heâs thinking about, youâre gonna give him all the room to talk.Â
âJust like being where you are.âÂ
How you went from almost running out of his door to here, you arenât quite sure. But youâre grateful for that split second of him deciding to fight for the two of you instead of against, because you really were going to leave.Â
And you may have taken much, much longer to even try going back.Â
Your voice is barely heard over the aromatic smell and fizzle, âGood thing I like having you around.â When he smiles again, you let out a breath of a giggle, going back to shuffling the pan around and tilting your head to the fridge. âI put some fruit in there if you wanna eat that, too.â
âIâm down.â
âK.â
Your food is ready soon enough, and the two of you eat while talking about easy topics. Like work and your workplace dynamics, what Yoongiâs team has been working on at the studio.Â
At one point, your curiosity about the album release party grows from something he says. âSpeaking of. The partyâs on Friday, right?â
âYeah.â
âOkay, I thought so,â you deflate, setting your bowl down on the table. âSorry he canât go.â
âHuh?â
Your body stills. âWait. Did he not say anything? About his trip being extended?â
So much for nothing in his life being wrong. From the lost look on his face, you may have given him another reason to fold back in on himself. âNo.. No, he didnât.â
Both of you sit in silence.Â
This could be nothing. Right? That means your brother is confident he can make it so thereâs no point in telling Yoongi heâs gonna miss it. Or maybe heâs not trying hard enough and then not being able to say it to his face?Â
âIâm sorry,â you apologize. âI thought he told you.â
âItâs okay.â Clearly itâs not. âNot much to do about it now.â
âYoongi⊠What if he knows?â At your own question, you stiffen, curling into a proverbial ball. Fear and the sick backfire of fibbing has your mouth going drier than desert air. âWhat if he actually knows?â
Setting down his chopsticks, Yoongi looks your way, eyes unreadable behind his specs. âIf he did, do you think heâd leave us alone?â
Heâs got a point. âGuess not.âÂ
âMm.â Flicking his eyes to the window, he adjusts uncomfortably in his chair. âAnd I dunno if I mentioned this, but.. He thinks I got back with my ex.â
âFuck, really?âÂ
âThatâs the real reason why he hasnât been talking to me. Maybe he thinks sheâs gonna be there on Friday.â
âOh.â Your shoulders sag, and sag. Not owning up to your relationship is one thing; Yoongi having to dwell in his previous relationship is another. âIs that⊠worse?â
âShit.â Reaching across wood, you close your hand around his fingers for support. Itâs the only thing you can think to do. At least, itâs what you would want if you were in his shoes. âI think you should tell him she wonât be.â
A million seconds later, Yoongi thankfully agrees. âYeah, I will.â
You feel better. Somewhat. At least a little less nauseous about the possibility of your brother knowing.Â
But it still sucks knowing that heâs actively avoiding Yoongi because of an ex he used to have.Â
How bad was it back then if this is the case? What exactly happened? Is this why Yoongi went radio silent on you for weeks?
It seems like he doesnât even wanna talk about her. So you wonât pry just yet, as much as you wanna know every single thing sheâs done wrong so you can hound her through every timeline in existence.Â
Instead, you talk about a much better subject,Â
âWe should feed my cat now.â
And you quickly laugh at the saucy glint in Yoongiâs eyes.Â
â
â
Everything is set where it needs to be. Sugarâs food and water fill their respective bowls, your shoulder leans into Yoongiâs good side, and his arm rests around your back as heâs propped up by his banged up doorway.Â
You remember the first time you saw him lean against the wood like this. Only that time, you were a shell of a girl, waiting with shaky breaths and shaken confidence to hear his response to your inappropriate request.Â
Who wouldâve thought that youâd be on the same side as him all these months later? In his arms, resting a head on his warm chest?Â
When you let out a short chuckle, Yoongi turns to your smile. âHmm?âÂ
âNothing,â you wisp out. âJust thinking about us.âÂ
His fingers press into your side a fraction more, and you can feel him lift his head again. âMe, too.âÂ
Umm.Â
You can say things like that. He isnât allowed!Â
Youâre about to set some one-sided rules before your gift pops out of the bushes a few feet away.Â
âMy baby!â you quietly call, leaving Yoongiâs side to crouch down. âCome here, love. You hungry?â
She cautiously makes her way over, sniffing your hand when you leave it outstretched. After careful consideration, the little one nudges your palm, letting you glide fingers down her back as she approaches her bowls.Â
âYouâre so tiny,â you observe with slight pity. âWeâll get you well fed in no timeââ
âHey, Sugar! Oh, is this her? Sheâs gorgeous, no wonder!â
Huh? Sugar?Â
Who else knows the catâs name already?
Your neck almost strains when you look up to see whoâs talking. When you notice an older lady donning a really comfy, fluffy robe, you feel like it looks super familiar before you stand.Â
âHi,â you greet before introducing yourself, extending your hand and shaking the womanâs soft, delicate fingers. âSorry if we were too loud.â
âCall me Miss Dion. And you werenât too loud this time, sweetie,â she says with a wink, glancing down at the kitty eating what you laid out. âWas just cominâ out to water my plants so itâs good to see youâre here, too. Looks like he finally got some sense back in that head of his.â
âIâm standing right here, you know.â
âOh, I know!â
Back? How long has she known about you? Do her and Yoongi actually converse regularly? Their banter is⊠Really adorable.Â
Itâs making you fall even more in love with the man biting his cheek in amusement.Â
Wait.Â
Is Yoongi Sugar?Â
That is so fucking cute you could cry.Â
âIâm back to take care of this guy,â you explain with a head tilt. âAnd the little one, of course.âÂ
Itâs when you say this that Miss Dion notices the bandages on Yoongiâs face, concern pushing down her brows. âWhat happened to you, young man?â
âNothing to worry about.âÂ
âYou sure? I got some ointment in my kitchen somewhereââ
âItâs all goodââ
âWeâll take it,â you cut him off, not looking but feeling his stare on your face. âHow much do we owe you?âÂ
âOh, donât you worry about that.â With a snuff at Yoongi and a smile your way, Miss Dion heads inside to fetch a bottle.
In the meantime, you give your lover a quiet stare before bending down to run your hands over soft fur.Â
âPapa Sugar is gonna need that so he canât argue,â you coo to your cat, cheekily ignoring Yoongiâs sputtering puff of air above your head.
âPapa Sugar? Really?â
You glance up to his smile with a mischievous one of your own. âWhat, you wanna be Sugar Daddy instead?â
The swirl in your belly is instant. Because Yoongi can only look out into the distance, biting his lip and failing to hide his grin.
Sigh. If only he didnât have those injuries across his face. Youâd push him back into the door and slam it shut if it was any other day.Â
Patience, patience, patience.Â
Those hits arenât gonna heal with just one round of gauze.Â
When you have to replace the cotton patches, at least youâll have something to help.Â
â
â
Itâs not until youâre about to tuck in for the night that Yoongi approaches your side of the bed. Judging by the headphones slung around his neck, heâs about to work, so you assume heâs just coming to give you a kiss goodnight.Â
But after he does exactly that, he asks you a question that warms your chest,Â
âWhereâs your keys.âÂ
âIn there,â you motion to the nearest wall, bag propped right under his windowsill. âInside pocket, I think.âÂ
Yoongi bends with a prolonged grunt, slowly rummaging until he finds your jangling keyring with its charms. When he grabs it, he silently sits on the edge up against your stomach, body heat permeating your tee while he fiddles with the clasps.Â
God, youâre so in trouble. You know exactly what heâs doing.Â
Unlike the last time he offered you complete access to his place, this time he didnât even hesitate. And the way he secures a key amongst the loop, itâs his silent way of cementing permanence.Â
Thatâs not another key for you to borrow.
Because that key is yours.
â
â
continued in angel, pt. 2
pitstop inbox before pt2!! | join the server!
a/n: holy crap we're doing it we are actually back in the main storyline?! how do we feel right now because i am over the damn moon diving into this story again. here's a slight pitstop before you make your way over to part two (THE CONTINUATION IS IN A REBLOG!) so take a breather before heading into the resttttttt
++ feedback box:
â„ of course, any reblogs/comments/messages are appreciated!
â„ for the ones that are too shy to reblog with a review, comment on this, or send a message, i went ahead and made another anonymous form where you can send in what you think!
â„ no emails collected, no need to put in a username. itâs literally just a comment dropbox :D feedback can be as short/sweet or as long as youâd like!
â„ here!
++ more links:
â„ masterlistÂ
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a/n 2: we did this for 3tanfugue and the energy was great! just like last time, some of you guys suggested that we have post goals to encourage interaction. no one voted against it yet, so we'll keep it goin!
note goal: since we're back in main storyline, upping the goal! 1,000 notes is the goal, so when we hit that, 3tan14 will be dropped as soon as it's done! thank you all for reading and would love to hear any thoughts: what did you like about the chapter? how did a certain scene make you feel? what are you excited to see next? any shares, comments, tags, and reblogs with commentary count, and i appreciate anything you guys have to say.
note 1: thank you so so much for the support! y'all you donât know how much it means to me. also, pls donât hesitate to let me know what you liked about the chapter with a message. it would mean so much.
note 2: if your url is not hightlighted, it means i couldnât tag you!
note 3: if you donât want to be tagged on anything specific or want to be removed from the permanent taglist, just message me and iâll remove you no prob!
explicit warnings: cursing, thigh riding, cowgirl, oral (m rec), naughty studio time(??), couch sex, rough sex, giving yoongi the business, bold as fuck reader, choking, spanking, penetrative sex, kissing deserves to be here too lol, alexa play no hands by waka flocka, deep throating, hair/head tugging, nipple play, yoongi in that gd tank, yoongi in those gd glasses, teasing, titty fucking hello!!!!, stripping while he watchesâŠ. yeah, missionary, sub!3tanyoongi?????, scratching, multiple orgasms, protected sex, emotional sex, the glasses.. stay on??, good god theyâre so hot iâm blushing
â
â
Itâs morning when Jimin gets a call.Â
Shifting in sheets that arenât his, he sleepily blinks once before eyeing the blue light with a squint, wondering who dares wake him up before his natural rise. What time even is it anyway? Itâs gotta be an ungodly hour if his circadian rhythm is disturbed.Â
Still, he grabs his cell from the nightstand, flinching at the movement behind him and inwardly slinging out curses.Â
Because waking him up is one thing.Â
But if anyone disturbs Taehyung heâs gonna give them hellâ
Min Yoongi: Incoming Call
Shit.
Jimin yanks the covers off, rushing out of bed and snapping Tae awake anyway. For what? Donât fucking know, but theyâre ready. Wherever. Whatever. They already stayed up clutching their phones until they physically couldnât keep their eyes open.Â
Because as much as Yoongi assured him nothing would happen, Jimin still couldnât let go of his car keys.
Answering slow, he feels his chest winding and winding, eyes locked with Taehyung while they both wait on edge, ââŠYoongi?â
âYeah.â
Thank the fucking stars.Â
Yoongiâs okay. Heâs on the line. He made it to morning or whatever fucking time it is, and heâs doing exactly what he said he would.
And itâs enough, enough, enough.
Burns zing up the corners of Jiminâs eyes, and he swipes hard as Taehyung moves, likely to hear whatâs happening and even more likely to just be by his side.Â
Jimin is grateful for either one. But he tries to keep composure as he croaks, âYou better have woken me up for a reason.â
The slight hum on the line induces a wobbly smile. âYou slept?â
âFuck you,â Jimin shakily laughs, wiping liquid relief from an eye before Taehyungâs thumb brushes tenderly over the other. His gaze is thankful while continuing, âWe did but not much.â
âSorry.â
âItâs okay.â Sniffling, Jimin walks to Taeâs door, letting him into the hallway first and finally drinking in the sight of his ass in those sweats. Because he can finally function like a normal, smitten loser again. âWeâll come over so we canââ
âNo need.â
âWhat?â Nope. Back to panic mode. And judging from his boyfriendâs posture, Taehyung has backpedaled into that, too. âWhat do you mean no need?â
Thereâs a slight pause on the line, and small noises make their way through the speaker. It sounds like bedsheets, but it also sounds likeâŠÂ
âSheâs still sleeping.â
Oh.
Oh, shit.
A tidal wave of relief crashes into Jiminâs ducts as he hangs his head, palming his face caught in a heavy tide of emotion. When he turns, Taehyung fairs no better, his eyes red and fingers wiping at a perfect, perfect cheek. One of them sniffles, but Jimin canât tell if itâs him or not, because his vision is blurry and his heart is beating, beating, beating again.Â
Whether you know it or not, whatever you did last night may have just changed Yoongiâs entire life.
Because Jimin knows this man through and through. Years of picking up his habits and tells didnât amount to nothing. Itâs how he was able to sense exactly when to intervene, and how he knew exactly what that hauntingly hollow tone in Yoongiâs voice meant when he busted in that day.Â
The tone he hears now? The man that just spoke on the line?Â
That is a Min Yoongi so in love he canât even hide it over the phone.Â
Fuck.Â
Gathering himself, Jimin squeaks out, âI⊠Iâm glad youâŠâ What the fuck does he say? Every thought jams in his throat so hard he has to hand the phone off.
Thankfully, Taehyung perfectly continues his thoughts, voice scratching rocks under a waking river, âWeâre glad youâre both safe.â
âMm.â
âSo whenâs the wedding?â
Jimin huffs through a fresh batch of tears, clearing his face before grinning at Tae very seriously awaiting an answer. Honestly, at this point? Itâs not far-fetched. Jiminâs seeing your future clearer than his present, and maybe he will be a fun uncle sooner than he thinks.
If only Yoongi would just get the fucking talk with your brother over with.Â
But Jimin understands the hesitation. If he were in that same position, thereâs no telling when he would be courageous enough to stand up to the guy. Thereâs a reason heâs quick to command a room, and his lifelong mission to protect his younger sister made him grow up a lot faster than everyone else.Â
Still⊠Yoongi just deserves to be happy. And youâre the very obvious answer to helping with that.Â
As much as he may have wanted some chances of his own, Jimin is grateful you found your way into his best friendâs heart. Not just anyone is invited inside, and even less people can truly be allowed to stay.Â
And youâre probably the only one that has permanent residence.Â
âYou guys should get some sleep.â
Taehyung pouts right on cue, and Jimin canât fight those sleepy, droopy eyes. âYou didnât answer me.â
Cute as fuck! He must be stopped. Taking the phone, Jimin speaks into the line fully recovered, shooting his cheeky partner a teasing glare, âWe will if you get some, too.â
âCanât.â
âWhy not?â
âGot some things to do at the studioââ
âNo!â They reject together, both equally as appalled because what the fuck kinda answer is that?Â
âAfter what happened last night? Are you crazy?â
âWhat happened to spending time with her? Men!âÂ
âHeâs going on a business trip, I canât lose to him.â
âSo what?â Tae asks before they both share an even further confused look. Yoongi may be a lovesick fool but that doesnât give him an excuse to be a dumbass! âYouâre just gonna leave her alone?â
Thereâs a sigh on the line before Jimin plants a hand on his hip. âNot just that. You gotta rest, too, bro. If she doesnât tell you to take it easy or at least get checkedâwhich she willâweâre going over there to annoy you.âÂ
âYou serious?â
âYes, Iâm serious.â Jimin cocks his head and leans closer to the phone. âAt least rest easy for the next couple days. Especially if you have all this time to see each other.â
The timing couldnât be more perfect. Your brother is leaving for his trip and Yoongi caught some unfortunate hits to his ribs. The dude basically has a free pass to spend the whole week with you, and heâs not even taking full advantage of it? Oh, the things Jimin has to say about the thin line of work ethic and relationship effort.Â
âIâll think about it.â
âThink about it for a long time,â Taehyung cuts in before Jimin can pop off, walking away into the living room.Â
Itâs fine. Let him figure out that you arenât a woman he can just leave. Frankly? That would tickle Jimin to no end to see Yoongi folding his plans so fast just to be with you.Â
But he spares him the tirade only because youâre fast asleep right next to him. âThank you for calling, man.â
âSaid I would.â
âI know.âÂ
Because above all else, Jimin is happy to hear that voice. Even if itâs obvious heâs a little banged up from last night, itâs still Yoongi. In one piece. Thatâs all Jimin wanted, and he canât thank you enough,
âDonât overwork yourself, and stay with her as long as you can.â
Thereâs a small laugh on the other end. âI plan on it, Chim.â
And Jimin catches on to why. âIâm holding you to that then.âÂ
â
â
Dawn breaks through open blinds, stretching its orange tint across a clean, spotless table.Â
You donât know what got you up so early. But when you peer into the kitchen, you tell yourself you woke up right on time.Â
Because seeing Yoongi when youâre wide awake is better than any dream youâll ever have.
Not because of his appearance, even though the sight of him sends a pang through your chest. No. Itâs the way heâs quietly prepping a morning meal, using the arm on his better side thatâs not sporting a nasty hit to the ribs, without you even asking.Â
Bits of sunlight dance right out of your eyes.
The effort. The consideration. This man shouldnât be lifting a finger, yet here he is cooking before you even left his bed. Isnât this the same man that got caught up in a fight hours ago? Isnât this the same man you almost walked out on with a frozen heart?Â
Yes. But heâs also the same man that loves you. And you still canât grasp that concept in any of the fingers playing with his tee you borrowed.
âHi,â you whisper, telling him a thousand things.Â
To which he regards before smiling soft, voice travelling over linoleum and circling around your heart, âMorning, doll.â
Damn. You hear it. Yoongiâs sore as hell.Â
But instead of getting into that right away, you silently take residence by his side. Because this moment feels too delicate, and you admire his willingness to take care of you unprompted. You didnât even know youâd eat before going back home.Â
With a hand warming his back, you wait until Yoongiâs done tossing food on the stove to peck his morning-chilled cheek. âThank you for cooking,â you murmur, admiring those beautiful brown eyes. âSleep okay?â
âCus of you,â your lover softly responds, eyeing your lips before gliding back up to your gaze. âYou?â
Ugh. Heâs gotta know those glasses are so unfair. Theyâve gotten you repeatedly before, and theyâre certainly getting you now.Â
But you canât help but deflate at the cuts behind those rims, while knowing there are even more bruises hiding underneath his oversized tee. How is Yoongi cooking right now? How is he even awake? âSame.âÂ
âGood.âÂ
These instant, deep shivers at his deeper morning voice will never, ever go away. But anything you wanna do about them isnât important right now. Right now, you need to make sure Yoongi is either okay, or finds a way to get better.Â
Sliding your hands down the slopes of his chest, you delicately rest one on his ribs. âDoes it still hurt?âÂ
Yikes. That wince is enough. But Yoongi doesnât shy away from your touch, and you appreciate the way he stays honest. âItâs sore. But I should be good.â
âYou gonna get it checked?â
Thereâs a slight upward tilt of his lips. âNot right now.â At least the honesty persists, as much as you donât want him following the typical manly response to hospital visits. âBut I will if you want me to.â
âPlease go,â you gently urge, lest you disturb the soft morning dew before it melts with the sunrise. âFor me?â
Only sizzles from the stove fill the space until Yoongi nods, and his voice is just as low and tender, âIâll go after work.â
Oh. âYouâre working today?â
Just like breakfast, you didnât expect this, either. Frankly, you figured neither of you were gonna even think about work, much less go. Sure, heâs due a hospital visit and you owe some friends immediate explanations for your absence. But other than that, shouldnât Yoongi be resting?Â
Does his craft truly mean that much?Â
Well, shit. You gotta respect his work ethic, thatâs for damn sure. Because you would sequester yourself to your bedroom and have endless dates with your television if you were sporting a good jab or two. This music thing must mean more to Yoongi than you previously thought. And who are you to step on that dream?Â
Suddenly, all thoughts and concerns flee from the kiss on your cheek.Â
âIâll stay if you stay,â he says, turning to move the pan and scrunching his face with a grunt. Fuck.Â
âIâŠâ Shit, you were gonna go back to the house anyway. And from Yoongiâs smartass smirk, you can tell he already knew that. âJust need to check on him, too. And he doesnât have a car right now, so. I should at least give him a ride.âÂ
âFigured.â In a move so domestic your head spins, Yoongi turns your body and gently pats your butt. âNow go sit. Letâs eat and figure this out.âÂ
â
â
As you devour a flawless meal and clean your dishes, you plan out the day. Youâll head home and check on your brother while Yoongi heads to the studio, and then youâll rendezvous with your friends to hang out until heâs done with work. Theyâre already lighting up your phone like no oneâs businessâespecially Yuri.Â
Yoongi flicks the sink off before you both head to his bedroom, and you melt at the way he slowly wraps his arms around your front halfway there, all four of your legs slowing to close the rest of the distance.Â
Whatâs he doing? This is joyfully new, but you have a pretty tight deadline. Warming his forearm and your own cheeks, you chuckle out, âWe have to hustle, old man.âÂ
âYou hustle me all the time,â he accuses into your shoulder blade, kissing its ridge and making you reconsider walking out the door entirely. âLemme have this.âÂ
Your second laugh is more subdued, and youâre right between his bed and desk when you lift both hands to hold him close. âYou have everything I got,â you wisp into his skin, planting your lips once, twice before you feel his arms press further in. âSo this is nothing.âÂ
Seconds and silence slide by, the delicate veil of early morning still hovering around the room. When Yoongi doesnât say anything, you make to turn and face him.Â
But youâre stopped before your heart skips.Â
âI could stay like this all day,â he admits, voice so low it rumbles through your bones. âAnd itâd be perfect.âÂ
âWhat, you donât wanna see my face?â You joke with a giggle. âRude, but thatâs fine.âÂ
Yoongi only buries his nose further, his glasses sliding against your skin peeking from his shirt. âIâm much braver right here, doll.âÂ
Oh.Â
The leap your heart does is more of a dive, plummeting into the seafoam swirling around your feet. All the words you want to respond with jump off right after, leaving you with nothing but the clouds in your eyes.Â
You donât quite know what he means by that. But it feels like those six words hold the weight of a thousand, so you simply let another kiss on his smooth forearm linger. âDo you want me to go with you?âÂ
A puff of laughter warms you right through and, despite his earlier admission, Yoongi does slowly spin you around.Â
And when you follow, you realize youâre much braver when you arenât facing him, too.Â
âItâs not that, babe,â he says through a dashing curve. âBut the offer was cute.âÂ
âI take it back then.âÂ
âDamn!âÂ
Both of your laughs whoosh out and collide, sweeping as Yoongi pinches your side and you flinch towards the bed. âYou fuckerâ!â
Before you know it, your back hits a comforter before a weight presses your stomach, emotions clashing as youâre elated and shy and immediately concerned for your boyfriendâs side. âBaby, be carefulââ
Lips capture yours, sucking up your warning before a hand slides under your head. Sighing, you arch into his chest, feeling the weight of his chains slip across your breasts.Â
Euphoria isnât an adequate enough word to describe how you feel. Where there used to be flutters in your ribcage now reside strong, powerful wing beats, gusts of want and desire lifting you off the ground and launching you into clear skies. Starlight of every color exists within each kiss you share, and your fingers feebly grab his tee to keep you from falling back down to earth.Â
âIf we donât go now,â Yoongi rasps before sliding his mouth against yours, âWeâre never going anywhere again.âÂ
âI know,â you whisper, willingly letting him kiss you once more, âIs that a promise?âÂ
âFuck, I wish.âÂ
You do, too. But you know youâre running out of time for what you need to do. And werenât you just saying you had to respect his aspirations? Shit, you really do need to snap out of it. âCome on,â you order with a pat to his chest. âWe have all week to do this. We got time.âÂ
Turns out, youâre still amongst the heavens. The way Yoongiâs looking at you? This is the closest youâll ever get to being held by an angel.Â
Did he get more handsome overnight? Or is it the light in his eyes sustained since his confession in the kitchen? You donât quite know, and you may never pinpoint why, but the tug he has on your heart spans space and time.Â
And youâll run through both forever to keep meeting him again and again.Â
Burns prick your eyes, but he mercifully stands before he can catch any evidence of your yearning.Â
Just like that, the two of you bounce back to getting ready, with him sliding notebooks and headphones in a backpack while you change into your own clothes. As you sling your bag over a shoulder, he reaches for the closest hoodie, and you wordlessly make your way to the front door.Â
You really do hope he gets looked at today. But just like the calm after a storm, you want to encourage him gently rather than shove him out. At least he seems receptive to your gentle suggestions.
But after you ask one more time and he simply nods, you lower your eyes to his kicks. âSorry if Iâm nagging. Iâd just worry less if you went right away, thatâs all.â
âYou arenât nagging, babe.â Your freshly bloomed lover reaches out to hold your wrist, smoothing a rough thumb over your skin. Fucking hell, you canât help but frown at the gashes and cuts marring his knuckles. âIâll go as soon as I can.â
Not just his hands, but his face. His ribs. And maybe other places you havenât even seen yet.Â
You donât wanna leave his side.Â
But you have to head out before your brother leaves. Things need to get patched up before he flies out into more stress, and you owe him an apology for walking out when he was still aching. Based on Yoongiâs physical state? Your brother could be hiding some big wounds and you didnât even wanna talk to him.Â
However. Was last night necessary? Absolutely. You cannot entertain the possible outcomes had you not tried hard enough to get through Yoongiâs door. His eyes were so dulled, his hands felt so cold. What would have happened if you didnât force yourself inside?Â
Why was that guitar smashed to pieces?Â
This is also why you refuse to leave. So many questions, so many things you still donât know. Like what all happened when you were separated? And how in the hell is this man in love with you?
âI donât wanna go,â you confess, instantly encased in his arms and warmth. âIâd much rather keep kissing you.âÂ
âTrue,â he says with a resigned huff, shifting his glasses with an adorable nose scrunch. If only he didnât have so many little red lines of conflict on his face. âBut we both have stuff to take care of, so letâs get all that done first.â
âUgh, fine.â Your groan is more teasing than serious, and Yoongiâs laugh is nothing but understanding.Â
Damn. You still feel it. You really donât wanna go. Be it the rawness of last night still on your skin, or the confessions still on your tongues, you just wanna stay by his side. âSorry,â you breathe out, lacing your fingers to pepper love along his strong, reddened ridges. âIâm serious. I donât wanna leave you right now.â
Walking out of Yoongiâs door just doesnât feel right. Even if heâs right there and will be following you out. Is this feeling normal? Are you supposed to feel this tightly woven to someone? Because the stitching between your hearts has only gotten stronger in the tempest of last night, as if you bonded together just to hold on for dear life.Â
Maybe thatâs exactly what happened. And itâs exactly why you can barely take one step out of his place.Â
âThen donât.â
Not one second passes before your chin is held, and lips slide so tenderly across yours that they may as well melt into your touch. Your reaction is quickly swooped into his mouth, and everything falls away as you let him seize your every thought. Lightning from last night zips out of your limbs, your toes, your fingers clasping his loose tee.Â
You might just cry where you stand.
How have his kisses gotten even better? How have you never felt this way even though youâve done this far more times than you were ever supposed to? It should be impossible, and yet, this man finds even more ways to astound you.Â
Yoongi slips a hand over your cheek, giving one more beautiful push of his lips as he confesses, âI donât wanna leave you, either.âÂ
And your breath stutters onto his features. âYou, too?â
Slow, he kisses your cheek, the clear rim of his specs skimming your nose. When he draws back, you look right into his eyes, wondering why heâs watching your mouth instead.Â
âMe, too.â Yoongi kisses your other side with a quiet peck. âFuck, me, too.âÂ
You fucking hate what you have to do, but you donât have a choice.Â
With one last lingering kiss, you both gather enough courage to set out and do what you must.Â
â
â
Your house is already a flurry of activity as you enter to see your brother in the kitchen, packing his leather duffle thatâs a constant companion on his trips.Â
Of course. The memory of him purchasing the lavish accessory pops into your head every time you watch him scurry around, dimples ever present on his proud cheeks. Itâs almost enough to make you smile yet again.Â
But you canât when the same face is currently scratched to hell. Just like Yoongiâs, if not worse.Â
Fuck, is he really gonna travel looking like that?Â
âHey,â he rasps out, still fighting off slumber. âYouâre back earlier than I thought.âÂ
âWanted to check on you before we left.â Fuck, your voice sounds like itâs being forced through a clogged pipe. Loosen the hell up! âAnd dude. Put some bandaids on, yeah?âÂ
âYeah, just give me a sec. Making sure I have everything before my ride gets here.âÂ
âHuh?â He got a ride? Youâre here now so you can take him to the airport. âYou sure you donât need me to drive you?âÂ
âYeah, itâs all good. I didnât know you were coming back.âÂ
Shit. His body seems just as angular as it did last night. Which, quite frankly, could still be from what went down in the lot.Â
Because even though you see both men banged up, you suddenly realize you donât actually know what all transpired.Â
After all, there wasnât much talk of it after you walked into the tempest of Yoongiâs living room.
Of course, you arenât gonna bring it up just this second. There are other things to ask about and make sure of first. âWallet? Phone? Passport?âÂ
âYup, yup, uhh.. Yup.âÂ
Zippers sling in the quiet morning air as you continue, âAnd youâre coming back on Friday, right?â
âOh.. Nah.â When you start crossing the kitchen, your brother hauls his leather bag over his better shoulder. Honestly, no one would be able to tell the other oneâs bruised with his suit on. That thing damn well covers everything except the cuts on his face and hands. âSaturday.âÂ
You pause in your journey to the medicine cabinet. âWait.. Saturday? The release partyâs on Friday.â
âYeah.. I know.â
What the fuck? Thatâs bullshit theyâre keeping him longer than they have to. Struggling to understand how corporate can keep your brother on a leash and get away with it, you urge, âTell them to at least let you go home a day early. Donât you wanna support your friends?â
âYou mean Yoongi?â
A zing of terror zips through your eyes, freezing every vein in an instant.Â
The fuck was that question? Never mind. Stay calm stay calm stay fucking calm. âUhh, yeah, heâs one of them? But the other guys, too, right? I know you care about them and this is huge.â
Mercifully, your sibling just shakes his head and waves you off. âDonât you think I already tried? I donât wanna miss it but I donât have a choice. Conference schedule is pretty tight and Iâm heading the panel on Friday.â
âIs it in the morning? You can fly out afterââ
âWhy are you fighting so hard?â
âWhy arenât you fighting harder!â
Okay, what in the hell is happening right now? Screw optics and how this must look for you, your brother needs to be there. Him and Yoongi are the tightest of friends, the most ride or die duo youâve ever seen. You canât picture a timeline where he misses this monumental moment, and itâs starting to really upset you that heâs barely trying.Â
âAlright, you know what?â Hard steps surge forward as you stand rigid, a duffle hastily dumped onto tile. âYou donât know what Iâve tried. You donât even know if I even told him yet.â
Fucking shit. You hold his stare before turning away, tossing out the idea of bandages entirely and searing footsteps into the hallwayâ
âOr do you.â
Before icing over with the unforgiving frost of zero gravity space.Â
Slow, you turn, not quite facing him but not backing down, either. ââŠExcuse me?â
âYou heard me. You talkinâ? What else has he been doing to you?â
Oh. Fuck that.Â
Doing to you?Â
Fuck all of this. This is too much to handle right now and you know youâre gonna snap if he keeps pushing because you are not having this conversation right before he leaves. Youâve already thought about this before, right? You cannot fuck with his head right before business trips because he needs to be on and locked in.Â
But now heâs fucking with your temper and those are some choice fucking words pulled out of his ass.Â
You donât think youâve ever legitimately threatened this man to his face and meant it before, and it tears a sharp corner of your heart, âYou better be very careful. With whatever you wanna say next.â
The air proves too thick to slice. While your body stands aflame, your brother is iced over, brimming with an energy that damn near takes physical form. âAll Iâm saying is? I find out some fucking bullshit is going onââ
No no no, not now.
Reacting fast is your only instinct, brain haywire and fizzling fizzling boiling. Harsh, you spin on your heel and shout the first thing you can think of, âOh, come onââ
âYou better hope to god youâre ready for whatâs comingââ
âStop!â Fuck fuck fuck, this is so frustrating because your head is exploding and your body is screaming to just tell him already. Fuck the consequences at this point this is ludicrous.Â
Doing to you? Yoongi? How dare he speak about his best friend like that how dare he accuse him without outright saying the words all you have to do is tell your brother how wrong heâs got it.Â
But you canât be the one. Yoongi said he would, and he probably took months to get to that point of strengthâand healing, from what you can tell.Â
This is between them. Them. You have to honor that, as much as you wanna just confess everything now and deal with it yourself.Â
But goddamn your brother is pulsing with anger and itâs leaking into your own charged air.Â
What does he think is happening? Does he think Yoongiâs just, what, playing you? Heâs wrong. Heâs so wrong. Yoongiâs been nothing but the best thing thatâs ever happened to you and shit your heart hurts becauseâŠ
Your brother is valid in thinking that.Â
How foolish. Didnât you guard your heart from Yoongi for the longest? Didnât everything start because you figured you knew who he was because of his reputation? You got him all wrong, too. So how can you be mad at your brother for doing the same?Â
Fuck, think. Just think before someone gets hurt.Â
Because if you arenât careful, someoneâor multiple someonesâwill get hurt in seconds. You have to bear the pain alone right now. To protect them both, you have to keep your trembling mouth shut.Â
And? You have to admit that something isnât fair here. Not to you, not to Yoongi, but to him. Last night was rough as fuck but, while you both got to have raw, beautiful closure, the one standing in front of you had to go to sleep in an empty house.Â
So chill the fuck out.Â
Breathing to cool down, you tense and loosen, tense and loosen. âI get it. Youâre angry, and you have a lot going on. But,â you bite down on your lip to keep going. âWeâre talking about something else. Weâre talking about you, and Iâm still pissed you even let those guys goad you into a fight. What are we, twelve?â
Seething, your sibling takes the switch of pace. But it is not what you want to hear. âAre you seriâ? What the hell was I supposed to do? That son of a bitch grabbed youââ
âI know,â you recoil. âDonât tell me like you were there, because you werenât.â
Finallyâfinallyâthose angry lines in his face vanish.Â
But they make way for something much worse than anger. Because your older brother, someone thatâs been there for you your whole life..Â
Looks absolutely stricken over the one time he wasnât.Â
Damn it.Â
Regretful, you drop your shoulders in exhaustion and quiet compromise. When you continue, your voice is much softer, âBut I told you: they were. Your friends, they were there because they knew you wanted that. Jimin got me away, Yoongi took me home and stayed.âÂ
You really have got to stop saying his name like you love him. It could start becoming too obvious.Â
Shuddering, you shift your weight, folding your arms and shrinking into yourself.Â
That night, despite Yoongiâs best and most gentle efforts, still clings to where that loser touched you at Dalo. You hate that you havenât gotten over it, and you loathe the way you still rub over the same spot. Over, and over. âWhat did you want him to do? Leave me here?â
âNo.âÂ
âExactly. And he didnât.â You adjust your stance again, making an impromptu gamble as you decide to let some truth leak out. Because your brother is owed at least this much. âAnd fine, you wanna know something? We do talk more because of it.â
Your brotherâs head snaps up, and you brace. Because if you show any shred of weakness or hesitation, heâll see right through your weak attempt to hide most of the truth,Â
âBut donât ever accuse him of doing anything to me. That was fucked up to say and you know it.â
âFuck.â In agreement, he rubs his hair back. âIt was. Iâm sorry.âÂ
âTrust me,â you swallow, hating that this is how things have to be for now. âYou have nothing to worry about. Heâs never.. Never done anything to me, anyway.âÂ
Itâs not a lie. Everything heâs done has been with you. For you. Because of you.Â
But your heartâs in anguish as it sinks. Because that expression on your older siblingâs face can only be one thing. Â
Pure. Utter. Relief.
Fire singes your eyes before you can quell the flame. Itâs the hardest technical truth to swallow.Â
Sure, he doesnât have anything to worry about as far as you being safe. And on top of that, he doesnât have to worry about any fake shit because Yoongi confessed to you last night.
But as far as his best friend sleeping with and now dating his sister behind his back? That is still very much sitting right in the center of the table.Â
And now youâre starting to see just how fucked all three of you are as soon as you sit down to eat the truth.Â
But Yoongi said heâd be the one to tell, so he will.Â
This feeling is so fucking miserable, though.Â
In the end, your brother is effectively convinced, raking a hand across his head and sighing. âJimin told me what all went down at Dalo, I just⊠Last night was⊠Fucked up.âÂ
âWell, yeah.â
âNo. See, this is just like what you said to me. You canât say it like you were there.â
Itâs your stomachâs turn to twist. âSo? You were scratched and bruised to hell, and YâŠâ Shut up, shut up. Youâre not supposed to know about the state of anyone else. âAnd you were⊠quieter.â
âBecause of what happened, dude.â
You blink. âWhat⊠What happened?â
Your brother looks at youâreally looks at you.Â
And suddenly, your gut flares in terror, storming in an instant across your abdomen.Â
âThat bitch pulled something on us.â
Your heart.Â
Itâs in freefall.
âWait⊠What?â You canât even form more than one syllable at a time, your legs turning gelatinous and knees starting to give out. âNo⊠What are youâŠ?â
What the fuck did he just say? That bitch pulled a what?Â
Your sibling slowly walks toward you once again, watching like heâs just waiting for you to say anything. Do anything.Â
But youâre a complete statue because all you can think about is the horror of something happening and the relief that nothing happened all at once.Â
Was Yoongi too scared to mention that part? Is this why he was holding back and shaking every time he reached out to touch you? Even this morning, he was soâŠÂ
Youâve never seen him like that. Is this why?Â
Your mind is swirling and crashing, overlapping each passing thought and scream running through your head. âIâm so sorry,â you hitch out, âI didnât know. Why didnât you say anything?â
âDidnât wanna scare you,â he sighs out. Putting both hands on his hips, your brother stops feet away, visibly still shook as he pierces wooden planks with his stare. âBut he pulled it right before Yoongi⊠and if it werenâtâŠFuck.âÂ
Burns flare and slice through your eyes when he has to pause. What is he trying to say? Pulled what?Â
Before Yoongi what?Â
Your brother continues, and your throat tightens. âIf it werenât for some random ass sirens, I⊠Things couldâve been so different.âÂ
What the fuck is happening. What the hell are you hearing?Â
âIt was probably dumb as fuck. But I was so fucking angry,â he grits out, watery eyes crushed looking your way. âSo fucking mad at how he was talking about you, I.. Walked right up to him and told him to fuck off.â
You canât even breathe.Â
âI still feel it,â he quietly adds, fingers pressed against his side. âRight here.âÂ
âFuck,â you finally choke out, eyes on fucking fire.Â
âBut all I knew was to keep you all safe,â he says, with hardened resolve and a wobbly chin. âAnd thatâs exactly what I did. I did that shit, even if that meantââÂ
Tears fling out of your eyes, flowing hot down your cheeks because you wouldnât want any of them to go out that way. Nothing happened nothing happened nothing happened and yet your body is acting as if something did and it hurts.Â
Your brother is there as soon as you crumple forward, letting you bury your head in his chest and sob your heart out. For him, for his friends, and for all the time you had with the man you love so, so dearly.Â
If anything happened to your brother before you came clean⊠If anything happened before you and Yoongi could evenâŠÂ
Suddenly, you feel equal weights of guilt. For running out on your brother. And for almost walking out on Yoongi.Â
You decide an apology is in order for both of them, and all the understanding in the world for Yoongiâs frosted demeanor as soon as you get him alone again.
And you are one hundred percent going to tell your brother everything once heâs back.Â
The tears cannot stop, and youâre sure you are crying unimpeded in a pressed and primmed suit. âIâm so sorry,â you keep repenting like a prayer. âThis is all my fault.â
âNoââ
âYou almostââ
âHey, stop.â He yanks you back, both of your faces soaked with saltwater. âWhat did I say before? I threw the first swing. You didnât do anything wrong.â
âBut it led to all this, I just.. I just feel so fucking stupid.â
âDonât. Hey, look at me.â Firm but gentle, he holds you at armâs length, forcing you to face him. âMaybe weâre both stupid, but you werenât the idiot. I was.âÂ
You feel so many conflicting things in your soul.Â
What would you have done if Yoongi was in critical condition? What would you have done differently if your brother was instead? Are they the same? Are the two situations really so different anymore?Â
No they arenât they arenât they arenât.Â
âPlease donât do that again,â you shake out. âEven if it was for me, if I ever lost you, I...âÂ
âYou know I canât promise anything.â He furrows his brows when you eye him with anger and sadness. âBut nothing like that is happening again. Especially with the same dudes.âÂ
âOkay.âÂ
A vicious tornado of emotions sends your whole body into agonizing pain. This isnât what you expected at all, and itâs causing your limbs to lock at the bends. Too many scenarios are jangling about yet you canât ask for specifics because that will just make it even more real.Â
A nightmare is somehow better once you know it ends with you waking up. âIâm⊠gonna need some time to process everything.â
âI know. And I wasnât planning on saying anything, but⊠You deserve to know the things I get into.âÂ
Ah.Â
The irony is not lost on you.Â
âAt least, if they involve you. We learned our lesson. You were right to tell us off.â
God. You feel numb.Â
âThanks,â you murmur, suddenly immensely tired. âI think I need more sleep.â
A blaring honk sounds outside the house, and you both flinch at the noise.Â
And your throat burns at the way your brother instinctively swept you behind his back.Â
When you realize what it is, you know what has to come next.Â
And heâs the first to react as he turns to face you again, âAlright. Iâm heading out, just remember to go get my baby when sheâs fixed, yeah?â
âDo you have to go?â
Wait.
The question seems to startle him as much as it does you.Â
How did you blurt it right out before even registering the words? Why does your heart clench at the sight of those eyes looking so pained?Â
Why does everything feel so shaky within these walls that were always your home?
âI do,â he says, voice tight. âIâm sorry.âÂ
And why the fuck do you feel sad heâs leaving?
âNo, no, itâs.. Of course you have to.â You canât help the lump in your throat from bobbing, the regret in your limbs as they barely move at your side. âI dunno why I asked, I guess I just..âÂ
Thereâs no response to your sniffle.Â
âSorry for yelling,â you squeak out. âI just feel really queasy.â
For a lot more reasons than one.
âWe all made it out,â your brother whispers. âThatâs what matters.â
âWill you⊠Will you at least try to be back for the party?â
The man swallows with his brows knit tight, then attempts to crack the tiniest smile. âYou know I will. Thatâs my guy.âÂ
âOkay.â You nod, sniffling again. After what he just told you? You know heâll do anything for the ones he loves. âSee you there.â
Your brother rubs a comforting palm over your head before turning, heading for the door and grabbing his leather duffle.Â
When he stops to glance at you one more time, you give a little wave of your hand before watching the door click shut.Â
Chest caving as you collapse to the ground in tears.Â
â
â
The need to call Yoongi burns so harshly your fingers damn near set your top aflame.
But heâs at work, and you canât fuck things up right when youâre approaching the finish line. You almost did with your brother, and that gave you twelve heart attacks in the span of minutes.Â
Still. Your chest aches so much that a thirteenth could very well be approaching. You donât even realize youâre bracing the hallway wall for support until you try to stand, back sore and aching from bending so far for so long.Â
What did your brother mean to say about Yoongi? What did that coward pull on them? Do you even want to know what happened?Â
Fighting back tears, you reach down for your phone, shakily typing out a message only to erase it. Then again. And again.Â
And again.Â
Giving up, you forcefully swallow all your worries, cringing at the bitterness of the unknown and the burnt molasses of hidden truths.Â
Itâs going to be okay. No matter what you think or imagine in your head, they made it out, they made it out, they are all alive.Â
Thatâs the only reason you can move forward, each step getting you from your room. To your bathroom.Â
And back again.Â
â
â
After showering, you feel lighter and refreshed, though the soreness between your legs has yet to leave.Â
But you wouldnât want it any other way, as itâs another reminder of Yoongiâs apparent brush with survival. His broken living room spurned the creation of your bond, your devotion to him as he confessed before you gave him your utmost trust in his sheets.Â
The end is so close. As soon as this week is over, youâll rip the last bit of peel from your pair of tangerines, baring all truths to your brother and facing the consequences.Â
Finally ready, you head to your car, opening your text threads with a plan: start slow.Â
Start with something that can be interpreted neutrally if anyone saw it on his phone screen, especially if your headstrong ex is in the room.Â
You [12:31pm]: how are you feeling?
Yoongi [12:34pm]: 1 AttachmentÂ
You close your door with brows furrowed.Â
Yoongiâs at the hospital?Â
Thatâs not what you expected at all.Â
Your chest swells with relief knowing heâs there, but you also wanna make sure heâs feeling okay. Especially his mental state after whatever the fuck your brother just dropped on you before leaving.Â
Goddamn, thatâs going to gnaw at your brain until you find the right time and right amount of courage to ask about it. Because itâs very possible Yoongi wonât tell you.Â
Because itâs probably something he knows you wonât like.Â
Fuck.Â
You [12:34pm]: Loved an Attachment
You [12:34pm]: thank you for listeningđ€ still sore?
Yoongi [12:35pm]: Yeah, but not bad. Just there.
Wait. Heâs not at the studio. That means you canâ
Yoongi: Outgoing Call
âHey.â
âHey,â you slowly say as you pull out into the street. âIâm driving now so this is easier.â
âCourse. You going to Taeâs?â
âMaybe. Iâm going to Yuriâs first.â You swallow, realizing that you didnât tell him about what you let slip before driving over. âI.. Told her. About you.â
Thereâs a little bit of silence on the line, just some adjustments and muffled speaker sounds. âSorry, just writing this down. Whatâs wrong with that?â
You huff through your nose. Gotta be those patient forms that always take forever to fill out. âOh. Just more and more people knowing, is all.âÂ
âEveryoneâs gonna know eventually.âÂ
You hold back a small smile. Because heâs right. âYeah. Iâm just tired of this feeling.â
âLike youâre hiding something.â
Itâs your turn for silence. He doesnât know how accurately that was played out today. The only answer you can provide is a curt, âExactly.â
âSame.â
Wings beat around your heart again.Â
He wants this. Yoongi really, really wants this. And years ago, that outcome wouldnât have even crossed your mind as an option.Â
âThank you for going, baby.â
âThe guys made me.â
You hum. âWhich ones.â
After a pause, you hear a puff of amusement. âAll of them at some point today, actually.âÂ
All of them? Does that include your brother? Did they talk about the trip already?
Your laugh is bittersweet. âWell. Glad to know you can be forced by everyone else except me.â
âHey, I was already gonna go because of you!â Yoongi quietly retorts, and you giggle at the pout in his words. âJust wanted to get a headstart on work first.â
You were right. He really does wanna go all out for his musical endeavors.Â
Itâs extremely admirable, and wildly attractive, but it does come to a point. âAs much as I love your passion, old man, I wanna keep you upright.â
He laughs soft into the line, and you think you can listen to that specific sound on an infinite loop. âThatâs fair.âÂ
âHow long is it gonna take, you think?â
âDunno. But Iâll keep myself busy until Iâm out.â
Of course he will. You donât doubt he wonât waste any time. Didnât he bring journals in his backpack? You wouldnât be surprised if he wrote ten thousand songs before being called in. âJust call me if you need anything, please?â
âOf course, babe.â
âThank you,â you say with utmost sincerity. âIf only my brother would be less stubborn and get checked, too.â
âHeâll probably do it once he gets there.â
âDid you convince him?â
âNah. But once he knows I did, heâll do it.â
âFigures.â You scoff. âOkay, Iâm almost there. Let me know how it goes.â
âK. Bye, doll.â
You didnât ask him what went down. But itâs not the time nor place, and you have plenty of chances this week to figure out when that would beâif at all.Â
âTalk soon.âÂ
â
â
For a normally bustling household, Yuriâs house is quiet.Â
So itâs not shocking when you walk into the kitchen and see all your friends glance your way, slowly vacating their chairs with eyes never leaving your face. Even Reia is on high alert.Â
Did Yuri tell her? Did Yuri tell anyone else?Â
No. Sheâs a talker and loves spilling, but she promised. And when she promises something, you know you can trust her to keep it.Â
Itâs what pours emotion in your voice as you meekly greet, âHey, guysââ
A crushing hug closes your throat. Yuriâs the one that gets to you first, with Reia and Dominique waiting their turns to offer you healing, relieved embraces.Â
âWhat happened?âÂ
âScared us half to death.â
Dom puts you at armâs length to give a once over, noting your face rubbed raw and eyes still a little bloodshot. Thankfully, her pupils hold more concern than disappointment. âYou good?â
Your eyes wobble alongside your smile, and you think itâs enough proof. âMore than that,â you still decide to whisper, and your heart beats again at her reaction.Â
âThank god. I was ready to kick your ass if you werenât.â
Heading up to Yuriâs room, you all wait until the door is swung back before mounting her canopy bed, sitting in a tight circle as you divulge everything.Â
Well. Almost everything.Â
You tell them that Yoongi is the one youâve been seeing, how you went to check on him last night in a panic, and the terrifying reason why. When you mention the fight after the basketball game, all three of your friends erupt in questions, and you have to assure them everything turned out okay. Honestly, you also do this to assure yourself, too.Â
âSo⊠Your brotherâs just fine with all of this?â Reia asks, not noticing the tick of Domâs jaw.Â
âWell,â you start with a higher pitch, earning a pair of groans. âHe doesnât exactly know yetââ
âYup. Heâs gonna murder him.â
âYeah, should we say our condolences now or..â
âHow long has this been going on?â Reia fires off another question that digs into your chest. âWas he the one you were seeing the whole time?â
âYes,â you admit with a sigh. âI shouldâve told you guys from the beginning, but. The whole thing just felt so delicate. But! We just started making things official recently, so..âÂ
Dom turns your way. âOfficial how?â
Well. Here goes everything.Â
With a shaky breath, and lingering feelings from the time it happened, you reveal with watery eyes, âYoongi⊠Told me he loves me.â
Both Yuri and Reia react in yelps, Domâs gaze lowering as the girls reach to grab your hands.Â
Wait. Whatâs going on with her? Sheâs the one that knows the most, sheâs the one that covered for you all those months ago. She has to be the one that is the least surprised at all this.Â
Blinking, you note to confront her about it later. Right now, youâre too focused on trying not to cry as your friends tumble out questions and support,Â
âHe said it? Did you say it first or did he?âÂ
âHow did it happen! Oh, Iâm so happy for you, babeââÂ
âThankâthank you, Yuri,â you squeeze out as she hugs you close. âI couldnât believe it, but he just.. Said it. We werenât even doing anything, I was just.. Looking up what injuries he could have..âÂ
And he confessed in the most Yoongi fashion he could have.Â
Looking back, it shouldnât shock you at all. Heâs always found ways to sweep you off your proverbial feet, so why would a confession plucked from the heavens be any different?Â
She lets you go before wiping her eyes, Reia and even Dom now sporting watery pupils, too.Â
âAs much as Iâm upset at you for not telling us, Iâve never been so happy for you.â When Yuriâs features crease in another sob, you sniffle along with the rest. âItâs been so long since you⊠And you really.. Fuck.âÂ
You know what sheâs trying to say, and the realization has your throat constricting so tight.Â
Itâs been forever since youâve had something like this, someone like this. When you and Jungkook were together, you told him that you loved him before he broke it off.Â
Sure, you bought the rings together, but he never uttered those words until years after when it didnât even matter. And all your relationships after his were complete and utter bullshit, so you donât think you ever even heard those three words and knew them to be true.Â
Yoongi was the first to ever say them so sincerely.Â
And that fact makes your ducts burn and burn.Â
And when Yuri finally speaks, it breaks the dam holding your real deluge back,Â
âI canât think of anyone else that deserves to be loved more than you.âÂ
All at once, everything streams out as you hunch forward. The pain of everything youâve endured, the hopelessness of knowing youâd most likely end up alone, the excruciating prospect of a future that you never deemed bright, or peaceful, or comforting.Â
And to think that even this man couldâve been snatched away from you in a snap? Even more tears overlap with the ones youâre shedding, and you canât even reach out to hug all three beautiful, angelic souls surrounding you with tight arms and sobs because your limbs lock at all bends.Â
Itâs the exact release you need. All your friends supporting you, all the pent up anxiety of last night and today, the truth setting itself free in some capacityâall in the comfort of a plushie-laden bed you only doubted yourself in last time.Â
Everythingâs gonna be alright. It has to be. Youâre gonna fight for the ones you love, even if a war between them is inevitable.Â
It takes a few minutes of heavy silence for you all to separate, swiping and rubbing tears while letting out happy sniffles.Â
When you thank them for being understanding, they assure you itâs okay. And when you say youâre going to tell your brother soon, a force from the doorway has all of you leaping from lilac sheets,Â
âTell him what?âÂ
Jia stands firm with a laundry basket at her hip, and Yuri scoffs at her older sister for barging in. âA knock wouldâve been nice!âÂ
Fuck!Â
You canât tell Jia of all people. If you spill anything about Yoongi, sheâs one hundred percent going to tell your brother. Theyâre the same age, and run in pretty tight circles, so of course you are not going to risk it.Â
But you can tell her something else youâre going to tell your older sibling, so you fire out a half-truth,Â
âTell him not to pick any other fights that could get him killed.âÂ
Jiaâs eyes zoom to your wrecked face, and she drops the laundry with haste before asking, âWhat happened? When? Tell me now.âÂ
Huh. Maybe your brother has a type, if heâs still into Jia like he said before.Â
You feel a little spark in your chest as you let her know they all got in a scuffle after the basketball game, and another pang as she immediately abandons the room and clothes with a fierce declaration,Â
âIâm gonna kill them myself!âÂ
âDonât worry, I already hounded my brother!â You call out after her, sighing as Yuri shakes her head with a smile. âShe gets like that when sheâs really worried, huh.âÂ
âYeah..â Your friend leans to look around you, noticing the basket left alone on the ground. âAnd if sheâs super fired up, she drops everything and doesnât stop until itâs handled. Clearly.âÂ
Maybe both older siblings really are similar.Â
The firestorm of an interruption seemed to break the tension in the room, with all of you finally relaxing and catching up. When they ask you questions, you answer what you can.Â
And when you divulge information that has your ears burning, their squeals and yells give you whole new reasons to live.Â
â
â
After a very comforting lunch Yuriâs mom cooked, you head to the bathroom when your phone suddenly vibrates through your palm.
Huh? Thatâs weird. You expect the name on your screen to be Taehyung, not Yoongi.Â
Not that itâs a bad thing. Youâve been waiting to hear from him, so this is a pleasant surprise.Â
Closing the door to the guest bathroom, you gaze at the calming sage decor with a smile. âHi, how did itââ
âYouâre coming over later, right?â
Oh, shit. Is he okay?
âYes, baby,â you respond with a soothing lilt, ears perked and body on high alert.Â
Does he think you arenât anymore? You both decided on the plans earlier. Surely he knows youâd never just flake on him. âIâm coming back once youâre done with work, remember?â
Thereâs an uncomfortable pause on the line, which makes your boyfriendâs next question jab you so far in the lungs you canât breathe,
ââŠCan it be now?â
Shit.Â
Just like Jia earlier, you drop every plan you have to the wayside. Youâre sure that Taehyung will understand, and you already got through the biggest conversation you needed to with your friends.Â
âOf course,â you whoosh out. âLemme just say bye and Iâll go.âÂ
âTake your time.â A small shuffling interrupts. âItâll take me a bit to get back.âÂ
âOkay. See you there.âÂ
The strained urgency in his voice makes your hair stand on end, so you vacate the bathroom to inform the girls that you gotta goâbut not without a quick head tilt towards Dom, who follows you outside and into the afternoon sun. Â
â
â
You wait until youâre next to your car on the street, turning with a concerned expression and jittery nerves, âWhatâs up with you? Did I do something wrong?â
Turns out, you read Dominique correctly. Her jaw locks before loosening, and it reminds you of the time she confronted you about Yoongi before. God, how much has changed since then. That feels like ages and ages ago.Â
âItâs not about you,â your best friend clears the air and the tightness in your shoulders. âIâm just.. Glad he came around.â
âYoongi?â When Dom nods, you blink. âWait, what?â
âAt your house that night.. After he left your room, we hadâI dunno, a heart-to-heart.â She sighs, flicking braids over her shoulder. You note to compliment the beads she chose this time, because they remind you of summer and simpler times. âI mightâve pressured him a bit, and.. I think he wanted to tell me that he loved you. All the way back then.âÂ
Something in your heart stutters, and you can only repeat your last question, âWhat?â
âYeah. Something about needing to do something first,â she continues, holding your gaze with perfect brows furrowed in sunlight. âBut I could tell he was damn serious about whatever it was. And if he was willing to do it for you? I let it go.âÂ
Your mind whirls.Â
Yoongi was already in love with you back then? Is that why he needed to let you go? To deal with whatever he had to do?Â
One side of you breaks thinking he had to go through all that alone; the other side is screaming at his past self for not even giving you a choice. What did he go through? What did he have to do?
Now you really have to see him. Immediately.Â
âThank you, Dom,â you rush out while opening your door. âIâm just happy itâs over.â
âThe hell itâs not.â Shooting you a glare that heats the oncoming breeze, she reminds, âItâs not over until your brother knows. And based on everything thatâs happened? That conversation is not gonna go over well.âÂ
A dark, simmering boil starts in your stomach, and youâre already feeling queasy again. Tightening your door handle, you gulp hard. âI know.âÂ
âTrust me, Iâm happy for you both. I am.â Both hands find her hips as she levels a gaze that you really, really donât enjoy. âBut Iâm gonna be honest, I think this is gonna ruin their friendship for good.âÂ
Both of your lungs clamp shut.Â
âPlease donât say that,â you beg, âIâm gonna fight for all of us. I will.âÂ
âI donât doubt that, babe. Hey, uh uh, come here.â Reaching out, she gives you a tight hug just when you feel fragile again.Â
âListen to me. I donât doubt that,â she says into your shoulder. âIâm just here to be realistic. Just donât be shocked if thatâs how it goes. Weâll be here for you no matter what, too.âÂ
âOkay,â you say with a scrunched face into her scent. God, she always smells so good, and itâs almost enough to calm you down. Almost almost almost. âThank you. But Iâm not giving up.âÂ
âThatâs my girl.â She squeezes you one more time. âI love you.âÂ
With eyes searing over, you choke and grip her tighter. âI love you, too.âÂ
â
â
Yoongiâs door warms your back as you wait for him to show.Â
But thereâs a good chance it can just be your volcanic anxiety.Â
Ever since your arrival, youâve paced, youâve gnawed on your lips, youâve had to shake the nerves out of your hands.Â
And over and over, youâve strained your neck to look for your favorite cat, because you could sincerely use even a glimpse of her right now.Â
While she doesnât end up showing, Yoongi rounds the nearest corner minutes after your last desperate scan.Â
Fuck, heâs so handsome.Â
Even now, as he simply walks toward you with a backpack slung over his shoulder, you watch with undying yearning to feel those flowing bangs over his forehead. Youâd even settle for a single touch of his cheeks, one of them currently sporting a thin bandage.
But the closer Yoongi gets, the quicker your admiration morphs into concern. Thereâs a deep bend in his brows that you canât decipher, and his fist is balled pretty tight.Â
Seriously, what happened? He looks so troubled that you slowly push off the doorway to ask,Â
âBaby, whatâsââ
A bag hits the ground before youâre swooped into a kiss so electric your lips spark.Â
Him. Him, him, and more him. For the love of everything you donât understand whatâs happening but you kiss Yoongi back with everything you have, arms slinging around his strong shoulders and tugging him closer because he clearly needed this.Â
And fuck if you didnât need it just as much. Screw it if anyone sees you. This is all you want and youâll stay right here until he pulls away.Â
When he finally does, both of you swallow to catch your breaths, and your soul glimmers when his forehead meets yours.Â
âHi, baby,â you whisper to his exhales. âMissed you, too.â
Silent, your lover kisses your forehead before hugging you close, and youâre more sure of your prediction than ever. Something is bothering him.Â
He doesnât look worse, at least. But thereâs clearly something off and heâs not hiding it. His lack of words is loud enough.Â
âLetâs go inside,â you quietly suggest. âI wouldâve gone in already but I donât have a key.â
He nods, fishing out his keyring to let you both inside.Â
When you set your bags down and slip off your shoes, itâs only seconds before youâre softly pulled into a hug again, surprising yet so, so welcoming.Â
Even only after a few hours, youâve missed the fuck out of him. Which makes all of this an outright dream.Â
âSorry,â Yoongi finally murmurs against your shoulder. âI justâŠâ
âNothing to be sorry for.â You stroke a hand along his hair, massaging his scalp and loving how soft it feels. The windswept strands fall back into place as you keep running your fingers through. âDid you at least get your appointment?â
âYeah, I did.â He buries his face further. âNothing bad. Just canât lift anything heavy for a couple days.â
âGood. Thatâs easy to manage,â you whisper back into his tee, feeling the chill of lingering air conditioning and body warmth all at once. âIs something else bothering you?â
âNot exactly.â Whatever that means. âIâll tell you about it later. Just wanted this, and you.â
Oh. ThatâsâŠÂ
âIâm here now, love,â you assure with a melting heart, wondering what happened to cause this behavior.Â
Is it because of last night? Or something that happened today? Youâre anxious all over again, but from the way Yoongiâs acting, your worries are second to his. âHave you eaten yet?â
He shakes his head, only pulling you closer with not a word from his lips.Â
And from this point on, you make a silent vow to yourself. Whatever Yoongi needs, youâre going to take care of him.Â
No matter what, these next few days are all about himâa minuscule sacrifice in comparison to everything heâs done for you, whether you knew about it or not.
âIâll make you something then. Come on.âÂ
When you walk, you slip your hand down his arm to hold his hand, and your lead into his kitchen is short.Â
âAny requests?â You cheerfully ask as you spare a smile over your shoulder. âWe can do⊠Something lightâŠâ
Only to see him staring back with nothing but a lingering sense of longing.
Okay.Â
You need to get to the bottom of this now.Â
Stopping right over linoleum, you leave no room for arguments, âYoongi. Tell me whatâs wrong.â
He blinks before his gaze meets the floor. So youâre confused when he simply, quietly..Â
Laughs?Â
âItâs not that somethingâs wrong,â he slowly starts, a shy smile carving his features. âFor the first time in my life, nothingâs wrong.âÂ
Your heart beats extra loud.Â
âBut itâs too much to explain right now.â His eyes rise to meet yours. âJust know that Iâm so in love with you.âÂ
Oh.
âAnd I want you to know that every day I live.â
Fuck.
Your body responds before you can say anything, lips connecting to remove any need for speech. The knowledge of them all staring death in the face last night makes this confession sear your insides, and you canât help but kiss him like youâll never get to again.Â
Yanking him back, you spin on your heel until he flings into the kitchen, clutching your wrists before gripping your jaw with both hands.Â
His mouth heats on yours, his glasses the only barrier between your skin. Everything sizzles from your head to your toes, and you both bang into a countertop beforeâ
âFuck, ouch.â
âShit, you okay?â
Yoongi rubs his side with one eye pinched shut, a corner of his teeth present. âYeah. Worth it, though.â
âBe serious,â you reprimand. Looks like heâs gonna have to take it easy, which means no going at it like animals until heâs on the mend. âNo more until you feel better, yeah?â
âSays who?â
âBabe.â
His deadly pout almost breaks your resolve. âFine.âÂ
But you can wait. Youâre sure it wonât take long, and for this man? Youâll wait however long you need to.Â
Besides, thereâs plenty of things you can do in the meantime that donât require running into hard objects.Â
âGood. Now letâsâŠâ You turn away to get started before youâre held, and pulled back into yet another embrace.Â
What the hell is happening today? Your lungs and your melting pile of a brain can only take so much. Itâs beautifully overwhelming how Yoongi canât seem to let you go, because youâre the one that always loses control.Â
This whole time, itâs been you that canât hold yourself back.Â
So now? Being on the other side? You donât think you ever want him to restrain himself again.Â
This time, he moves slow. Sensuously slow, and it would occur to you that heâs finding a very cheeky loophole to your plan if you werenât so hazy-eyed.Â
Whatever Yoongiâs doing, you wonât stop him.Â
Your back touches a counter before Yoongi cages you in, and your lips mold together as perfectly as his body does with yours. Your unhurried strokes match his, and your minds communicate without a single word.Â
Thereâs yearning still ever present. But thereâs comfort in abundance, and a whole new level of need.Â
After he pulls away, you can visibly see him drink you in from head to toe.Â
âYou know.. Iâm good holding off on all the other shit.â Pulling you in, his lips curve as he confidently declares, âBut Iâm never gonna stop kissing you.âÂ
His hands, his lips, his words. They all have healing powers, youâre so sure of it. If Yoongi hasnât yet realized his unending pain has blossomed into a safe haven, you need to let him know no matter what,Â
âGood.â
Thereâs still a pining in his eyes, but he lets you free, hand skirting your hip before he walks to his room. âGonna change then Iâll help.âÂ
âYou donât have to, baby,â you say as you struggle to catch your breath. âI got it.âÂ
Three minutes later, heâs chopping an onion anyway.Â
But youâre loving how serene everything feels with the two of you prepping and dicing, thumps of knives on wood intertwining in sound before you laugh at his crying over the pesky vegetable. Maybe if he wore contacts instead of specs, heâd be better off.Â
Not that his choice of eyewear is what youâre complaining about. But those glasses paired with the cream tees heâs been wearing? There will be hell to pay as soon as you get a chance at revenge.Â
Your pot is set to boil for a bit, so you finally rest against the counter and start a timer on his microwave. âGo ahead,â you gesture to your very handsome cooking partner. âYou can sit now.â
âHuh? Weâre not done yet.â
âOh.â Blinking, you tilt your head in confusion because you couldâve sworn you heard him yawn a couple times. âYou arenât tired?â
âI am,â he says before squeezing his eyes, rapid blinks to follow. âBut Iâm fine here.â
You toss and turn the food around, sprinkling a little more seasoning and hearing the bubbles and fizzes. When you stir a little more, a sudden thought occurs, halting your movements and spinning you around,Â
âAre you staying there to watch my ass.â
Yoongiâs slow smile gives everything away, but he also makes up for the blatant staring.Â
âCanât deny thatâs one of the things.â Pushing off the sink, he stands right next to you, slotting a hand behind your neck and angling you for a kiss. âBut I meant it earlier. I justâŠâ
Youâre completely silent as you watch him slide his eyes from your face to the sizzling food. Whatever heâs thinking about, youâre gonna give him all the room to talk.Â
âJust like being where you are.âÂ
How you went from almost running out of his door to here, you arenât quite sure. But youâre grateful for that split second of him deciding to fight for the two of you instead of against, because you really were going to leave.Â
And you may have taken much, much longer to even try going back.Â
Your voice is barely heard over the aromatic smell and fizzle, âGood thing I like having you around.â When he smiles again, you let out a breath of a giggle, going back to shuffling the pan around and tilting your head to the fridge. âI put some fruit in there if you wanna eat that, too.â
âIâm down.â
âK.â
Your food is ready soon enough, and the two of you eat while talking about easy topics. Like work and your workplace dynamics, what Yoongiâs team has been working on at the studio.Â
At one point, your curiosity about the album release party grows from something he says. âSpeaking of. The partyâs on Friday, right?â
âYeah.â
âOkay, I thought so,â you deflate, setting your bowl down on the table. âSorry he canât go.â
âHuh?â
Your body stills. âWait. Did he not say anything? About his trip being extended?â
So much for nothing in his life being wrong. From the lost look on his face, you may have given him another reason to fold back in on himself. âNo.. No, he didnât.â
Both of you sit in silence.Â
This could be nothing. Right? That means your brother is confident he can make it so thereâs no point in telling Yoongi heâs gonna miss it. Or maybe heâs not trying hard enough and then not being able to say it to his face?Â
âIâm sorry,â you apologize. âI thought he told you.â
âItâs okay.â Clearly itâs not. âNot much to do about it now.â
âYoongi⊠What if he knows?â At your own question, you stiffen, curling into a proverbial ball. Fear and the sick backfire of fibbing has your mouth going drier than desert air. âWhat if he actually knows?â
Setting down his chopsticks, Yoongi looks your way, eyes unreadable behind his specs. âIf he did, do you think heâd leave us alone?â
Heâs got a point. âGuess not.âÂ
âMm.â Flicking his eyes to the window, he adjusts uncomfortably in his chair. âAnd I dunno if I mentioned this, but.. He thinks I got back with my ex.â
âFuck, really?âÂ
âThatâs the real reason why he hasnât been talking to me. Maybe he thinks sheâs gonna be there on Friday.â
âOh.â Your shoulders sag, and sag. Not owning up to your relationship is one thing; Yoongi having to dwell in his previous relationship is another. âIs that⊠worse?â
âShit.â Reaching across wood, you close your hand around his fingers for support. Itâs the only thing you can think to do. At least, itâs what you would want if you were in his shoes. âI think you should tell him she wonât be.â
A million seconds later, Yoongi thankfully agrees. âYeah, I will.â
You feel better. Somewhat. At least a little less nauseous about the possibility of your brother knowing.Â
But it still sucks knowing that heâs actively avoiding Yoongi because of an ex he used to have.Â
How bad was it back then if this is the case? What exactly happened? Is this why Yoongi went radio silent on you for weeks?
It seems like he doesnât even wanna talk about her. So you wonât pry just yet, as much as you wanna know every single thing sheâs done wrong so you can hound her through every timeline in existence.Â
Instead, you talk about a much better subject,Â
âWe should feed my cat now.â
And you quickly laugh at the saucy glint in Yoongiâs eyes.Â
â
â
Everything is set where it needs to be. Sugarâs food and water fill their respective bowls, your shoulder leans into Yoongiâs good side, and his arm rests around your back as heâs propped up by his banged up doorway.Â
You remember the first time you saw him lean against the wood like this. Only that time, you were a shell of a girl, waiting with shaky breaths and shaken confidence to hear his response to your inappropriate request.Â
Who wouldâve thought that youâd be on the same side as him all these months later? In his arms, resting a head on his warm chest?Â
When you let out a short chuckle, Yoongi turns to your smile. âHmm?âÂ
âNothing,â you wisp out. âJust thinking about us.âÂ
His fingers press into your side a fraction more, and you can feel him lift his head again. âMe, too.âÂ
Umm.Â
You can say things like that. He isnât allowed!Â
Youâre about to set some one-sided rules before your gift pops out of the bushes a few feet away.Â
âMy baby!â you quietly call, leaving Yoongiâs side to crouch down. âCome here, love. You hungry?â
She cautiously makes her way over, sniffing your hand when you leave it outstretched. After careful consideration, the little one nudges your palm, letting you glide fingers down her back as she approaches her bowls.Â
âYouâre so tiny,â you observe with slight pity. âWeâll get you well fed in no timeââ
âHey, Sugar! Oh, is this her? Sheâs gorgeous, no wonder!â
Huh? Sugar?Â
Who else knows the catâs name already?
Your neck almost strains when you look up to see whoâs talking. When you notice an older lady donning a really comfy, fluffy robe, you feel like it looks super familiar before you stand.Â
âHi,â you greet before introducing yourself, extending your hand and shaking the womanâs soft, delicate fingers. âSorry if we were too loud.â
âCall me Miss Dion. And you werenât too loud this time, sweetie,â she says with a wink, glancing down at the kitty eating what you laid out. âWas just cominâ out to water my plants so itâs good to see youâre here, too. Looks like he finally got some sense back in that head of his.â
âIâm standing right here, you know.â
âOh, I know!â
Back? How long has she known about you? Do her and Yoongi actually converse regularly? Their banter is⊠Really adorable.Â
Itâs making you fall even more in love with the man biting his cheek in amusement.Â
Wait.Â
Is Yoongi Sugar?Â
That is so fucking cute you could cry.Â
âIâm back to take care of this guy,â you explain with a head tilt. âAnd the little one, of course.âÂ
Itâs when you say this that Miss Dion notices the bandages on Yoongiâs face, concern pushing down her brows. âWhat happened to you, young man?â
âNothing to worry about.âÂ
âYou sure? I got some ointment in my kitchen somewhereââ
âItâs all goodââ
âWeâll take it,â you cut him off, not looking but feeling his stare on your face. âHow much do we owe you?âÂ
âOh, donât you worry about that.â With a snuff at Yoongi and a smile your way, Miss Dion heads inside to fetch a bottle.
In the meantime, you give your lover a quiet stare before bending down to run your hands over soft fur.Â
âPapa Sugar is gonna need that so he canât argue,â you coo to your cat, cheekily ignoring Yoongiâs sputtering puff of air above your head.
âPapa Sugar? Really?â
You glance up to his smile with a mischievous one of your own. âWhat, you wanna be Sugar Daddy instead?â
The swirl in your belly is instant. Because Yoongi can only look out into the distance, biting his lip and failing to hide his grin.
Sigh. If only he didnât have those injuries across his face. Youâd push him back into the door and slam it shut if it was any other day.Â
Patience, patience, patience.Â
Those hits arenât gonna heal with just one round of gauze.Â
When you have to replace the cotton patches, at least youâll have something to help.Â
â
â
Itâs not until youâre about to tuck in for the night that Yoongi approaches your side of the bed. Judging by the headphones slung around his neck, heâs about to work, so you assume heâs just coming to give you a kiss goodnight.Â
But after he does exactly that, he asks you a question that warms your chest,Â
âWhereâs your keys.âÂ
âIn there,â you motion to the nearest wall, bag propped right under his windowsill. âInside pocket, I think.âÂ
Yoongi bends with a prolonged grunt, slowly rummaging until he finds your jangling keyring with its charms. When he grabs it, he silently sits on the edge up against your stomach, body heat permeating your tee while he fiddles with the clasps.Â
God, youâre so in trouble. You know exactly what heâs doing.Â
Unlike the last time he offered you complete access to his place, this time he didnât even hesitate. And the way he secures a key amongst the loop, itâs his silent way of cementing permanence.Â
Thatâs not another key for you to borrow.
Because that key is yours.
â
â
continued in angel, pt. 2
pitstop inbox before pt2!! | join the server!
a/n: holy crap we're doing it we are actually back in the main storyline?! how do we feel right now because i am over the damn moon diving into this story again. here's a slight pitstop before you make your way over to part two (THE CONTINUATION IS IN A REBLOG!) so take a breather before heading into the resttttttt
++ feedback box:
â„ of course, any reblogs/comments/messages are appreciated!
â„ for the ones that are too shy to reblog with a review, comment on this, or send a message, i went ahead and made another anonymous form where you can send in what you think!
â„ no emails collected, no need to put in a username. itâs literally just a comment dropbox :D feedback can be as short/sweet or as long as youâd like!
â„ here!
++ more links:
â„ masterlistÂ
â„ three tangerines masterlist
a/n 2: we did this for 3tanfugue and the energy was great! just like last time, some of you guys suggested that we have post goals to encourage interaction. no one voted against it yet, so we'll keep it goin!
note goal: since we're back in main storyline, upping the goal! 1,000 notes is the goal, so when we hit that, 3tan14 will be dropped as soon as it's done! thank you all for reading and would love to hear any thoughts: what did you like about the chapter? how did a certain scene make you feel? what are you excited to see next? any shares, comments, tags, and reblogs with commentary count, and i appreciate anything you guys have to say.
So good to have this duo back đ„ș Also Iâm so locked in to this Jia and Bro storyline â I was actually most excited to hear about Bro when the drop hitđ€đ„° Heâs become one of my fave characters ngl
gosh it really does feel good to have them back, too! missed them all dearly.. and jia and bro HELL YEAH!!! iâm also on that train they would be so cute lmfao
also?? wait iâm touched that you love brođđ ngl he deserves so much love like i will fight for him even if heâs a really big dummy sometimesđ
P.S this was the best thing to come home to after the slowest day at work
OMGGG you got to read it ahhhh!! truly have all the feelings all the emotions all the love and care just flowing from the pagesđ itâs like a dam broke after broken pt2 and they can now just.. be free with what they want to do and how to love each other in their own ways especially after every single thing theyâve both been through like excuse me if i cryđđ
explicit warnings: cursing, thigh riding, cowgirl, oral (m rec), naughty studio time(??), couch sex, rough sex, giving yoongi the business, bold as fuck reader, choking, spanking, penetrative sex, kissing deserves to be here too lol, alexa play no hands by waka flocka, deep throating, hair/head tugging, nipple play, yoongi in that gd tank, yoongi in those gd glasses, teasing, titty fucking hello!!!!, stripping while he watchesâŠ. yeah, missionary, sub!3tanyoongi?????, scratching, multiple orgasms, protected sex, emotional sex, the glasses.. stay on??, good god theyâre so hot iâm blushing
â
â
Itâs morning when Jimin gets a call.Â
Shifting in sheets that arenât his, he sleepily blinks once before eyeing the blue light with a squint, wondering who dares wake him up before his natural rise. What time even is it anyway? Itâs gotta be an ungodly hour if his circadian rhythm is disturbed.Â
Still, he grabs his cell from the nightstand, flinching at the movement behind him and inwardly slinging out curses.Â
Because waking him up is one thing.Â
But if anyone disturbs Taehyung heâs gonna give them hellâ
Min Yoongi: Incoming Call
Shit.
Jimin yanks the covers off, rushing out of bed and snapping Tae awake anyway. For what? Donât fucking know, but theyâre ready. Wherever. Whatever. They already stayed up clutching their phones until they physically couldnât keep their eyes open.Â
Because as much as Yoongi assured him nothing would happen, Jimin still couldnât let go of his car keys.
Answering slow, he feels his chest winding and winding, eyes locked with Taehyung while they both wait on edge, ââŠYoongi?â
âYeah.â
Thank the fucking stars.Â
Yoongiâs okay. Heâs on the line. He made it to morning or whatever fucking time it is, and heâs doing exactly what he said he would.
And itâs enough, enough, enough.
Burns zing up the corners of Jiminâs eyes, and he swipes hard as Taehyung moves, likely to hear whatâs happening and even more likely to just be by his side.Â
Jimin is grateful for either one. But he tries to keep composure as he croaks, âYou better have woken me up for a reason.â
The slight hum on the line induces a wobbly smile. âYou slept?â
âFuck you,â Jimin shakily laughs, wiping liquid relief from an eye before Taehyungâs thumb brushes tenderly over the other. His gaze is thankful while continuing, âWe did but not much.â
âSorry.â
âItâs okay.â Sniffling, Jimin walks to Taeâs door, letting him into the hallway first and finally drinking in the sight of his ass in those sweats. Because he can finally function like a normal, smitten loser again. âWeâll come over so we canââ
âNo need.â
âWhat?â Nope. Back to panic mode. And judging from his boyfriendâs posture, Taehyung has backpedaled into that, too. âWhat do you mean no need?â
Thereâs a slight pause on the line, and small noises make their way through the speaker. It sounds like bedsheets, but it also sounds likeâŠÂ
âSheâs still sleeping.â
Oh.
Oh, shit.
A tidal wave of relief crashes into Jiminâs ducts as he hangs his head, palming his face caught in a heavy tide of emotion. When he turns, Taehyung fairs no better, his eyes red and fingers wiping at a perfect, perfect cheek. One of them sniffles, but Jimin canât tell if itâs him or not, because his vision is blurry and his heart is beating, beating, beating again.Â
Whether you know it or not, whatever you did last night may have just changed Yoongiâs entire life.
Because Jimin knows this man through and through. Years of picking up his habits and tells didnât amount to nothing. Itâs how he was able to sense exactly when to intervene, and how he knew exactly what that hauntingly hollow tone in Yoongiâs voice meant when he busted in that day.Â
The tone he hears now? The man that just spoke on the line?Â
That is a Min Yoongi so in love he canât even hide it over the phone.Â
Fuck.Â
Gathering himself, Jimin squeaks out, âI⊠Iâm glad youâŠâ What the fuck does he say? Every thought jams in his throat so hard he has to hand the phone off.
Thankfully, Taehyung perfectly continues his thoughts, voice scratching rocks under a waking river, âWeâre glad youâre both safe.â
âMm.â
âSo whenâs the wedding?â
Jimin huffs through a fresh batch of tears, clearing his face before grinning at Tae very seriously awaiting an answer. Honestly, at this point? Itâs not far-fetched. Jiminâs seeing your future clearer than his present, and maybe he will be a fun uncle sooner than he thinks.
If only Yoongi would just get the fucking talk with your brother over with.Â
But Jimin understands the hesitation. If he were in that same position, thereâs no telling when he would be courageous enough to stand up to the guy. Thereâs a reason heâs quick to command a room, and his lifelong mission to protect his younger sister made him grow up a lot faster than everyone else.Â
Still⊠Yoongi just deserves to be happy. And youâre the very obvious answer to helping with that.Â
As much as he may have wanted some chances of his own, Jimin is grateful you found your way into his best friendâs heart. Not just anyone is invited inside, and even less people can truly be allowed to stay.Â
And youâre probably the only one that has permanent residence.Â
âYou guys should get some sleep.â
Taehyung pouts right on cue, and Jimin canât fight those sleepy, droopy eyes. âYou didnât answer me.â
Cute as fuck! He must be stopped. Taking the phone, Jimin speaks into the line fully recovered, shooting his cheeky partner a teasing glare, âWe will if you get some, too.â
âCanât.â
âWhy not?â
âGot some things to do at the studioââ
âNo!â They reject together, both equally as appalled because what the fuck kinda answer is that?Â
âAfter what happened last night? Are you crazy?â
âWhat happened to spending time with her? Men!âÂ
âHeâs going on a business trip, I canât lose to him.â
âSo what?â Tae asks before they both share an even further confused look. Yoongi may be a lovesick fool but that doesnât give him an excuse to be a dumbass! âYouâre just gonna leave her alone?â
Thereâs a sigh on the line before Jimin plants a hand on his hip. âNot just that. You gotta rest, too, bro. If she doesnât tell you to take it easy or at least get checkedâwhich she willâweâre going over there to annoy you.âÂ
âYou serious?â
âYes, Iâm serious.â Jimin cocks his head and leans closer to the phone. âAt least rest easy for the next couple days. Especially if you have all this time to see each other.â
The timing couldnât be more perfect. Your brother is leaving for his trip and Yoongi caught some unfortunate hits to his ribs. The dude basically has a free pass to spend the whole week with you, and heâs not even taking full advantage of it? Oh, the things Jimin has to say about the thin line of work ethic and relationship effort.Â
âIâll think about it.â
âThink about it for a long time,â Taehyung cuts in before Jimin can pop off, walking away into the living room.Â
Itâs fine. Let him figure out that you arenât a woman he can just leave. Frankly? That would tickle Jimin to no end to see Yoongi folding his plans so fast just to be with you.Â
But he spares him the tirade only because youâre fast asleep right next to him. âThank you for calling, man.â
âSaid I would.â
âI know.âÂ
Because above all else, Jimin is happy to hear that voice. Even if itâs obvious heâs a little banged up from last night, itâs still Yoongi. In one piece. Thatâs all Jimin wanted, and he canât thank you enough,
âDonât overwork yourself, and stay with her as long as you can.â
Thereâs a small laugh on the other end. âI plan on it, Chim.â
And Jimin catches on to why. âIâm holding you to that then.âÂ
â
â
Dawn breaks through open blinds, stretching its orange tint across a clean, spotless table.Â
You donât know what got you up so early. But when you peer into the kitchen, you tell yourself you woke up right on time.Â
Because seeing Yoongi when youâre wide awake is better than any dream youâll ever have.
Not because of his appearance, even though the sight of him sends a pang through your chest. No. Itâs the way heâs quietly prepping a morning meal, using the arm on his better side thatâs not sporting a nasty hit to the ribs, without you even asking.Â
Bits of sunlight dance right out of your eyes.
The effort. The consideration. This man shouldnât be lifting a finger, yet here he is cooking before you even left his bed. Isnât this the same man that got caught up in a fight hours ago? Isnât this the same man you almost walked out on with a frozen heart?Â
Yes. But heâs also the same man that loves you. And you still canât grasp that concept in any of the fingers playing with his tee you borrowed.
âHi,â you whisper, telling him a thousand things.Â
To which he regards before smiling soft, voice travelling over linoleum and circling around your heart, âMorning, doll.â
Damn. You hear it. Yoongiâs sore as hell.Â
But instead of getting into that right away, you silently take residence by his side. Because this moment feels too delicate, and you admire his willingness to take care of you unprompted. You didnât even know youâd eat before going back home.Â
With a hand warming his back, you wait until Yoongiâs done tossing food on the stove to peck his morning-chilled cheek. âThank you for cooking,â you murmur, admiring those beautiful brown eyes. âSleep okay?â
âCus of you,â your lover softly responds, eyeing your lips before gliding back up to your gaze. âYou?â
Ugh. Heâs gotta know those glasses are so unfair. Theyâve gotten you repeatedly before, and theyâre certainly getting you now.Â
But you canât help but deflate at the cuts behind those rims, while knowing there are even more bruises hiding underneath his oversized tee. How is Yoongi cooking right now? How is he even awake? âSame.âÂ
âGood.âÂ
These instant, deep shivers at his deeper morning voice will never, ever go away. But anything you wanna do about them isnât important right now. Right now, you need to make sure Yoongi is either okay, or finds a way to get better.Â
Sliding your hands down the slopes of his chest, you delicately rest one on his ribs. âDoes it still hurt?âÂ
Yikes. That wince is enough. But Yoongi doesnât shy away from your touch, and you appreciate the way he stays honest. âItâs sore. But I should be good.â
âYou gonna get it checked?â
Thereâs a slight upward tilt of his lips. âNot right now.â At least the honesty persists, as much as you donât want him following the typical manly response to hospital visits. âBut I will if you want me to.â
âPlease go,â you gently urge, lest you disturb the soft morning dew before it melts with the sunrise. âFor me?â
Only sizzles from the stove fill the space until Yoongi nods, and his voice is just as low and tender, âIâll go after work.â
Oh. âYouâre working today?â
Just like breakfast, you didnât expect this, either. Frankly, you figured neither of you were gonna even think about work, much less go. Sure, heâs due a hospital visit and you owe some friends immediate explanations for your absence. But other than that, shouldnât Yoongi be resting?Â
Does his craft truly mean that much?Â
Well, shit. You gotta respect his work ethic, thatâs for damn sure. Because you would sequester yourself to your bedroom and have endless dates with your television if you were sporting a good jab or two. This music thing must mean more to Yoongi than you previously thought. And who are you to step on that dream?Â
Suddenly, all thoughts and concerns flee from the kiss on your cheek.Â
âIâll stay if you stay,â he says, turning to move the pan and scrunching his face with a grunt. Fuck.Â
âIâŠâ Shit, you were gonna go back to the house anyway. And from Yoongiâs smartass smirk, you can tell he already knew that. âJust need to check on him, too. And he doesnât have a car right now, so. I should at least give him a ride.âÂ
âFigured.â In a move so domestic your head spins, Yoongi turns your body and gently pats your butt. âNow go sit. Letâs eat and figure this out.âÂ
â
â
As you devour a flawless meal and clean your dishes, you plan out the day. Youâll head home and check on your brother while Yoongi heads to the studio, and then youâll rendezvous with your friends to hang out until heâs done with work. Theyâre already lighting up your phone like no oneâs businessâespecially Yuri.Â
Yoongi flicks the sink off before you both head to his bedroom, and you melt at the way he slowly wraps his arms around your front halfway there, all four of your legs slowing to close the rest of the distance.Â
Whatâs he doing? This is joyfully new, but you have a pretty tight deadline. Warming his forearm and your own cheeks, you chuckle out, âWe have to hustle, old man.âÂ
âYou hustle me all the time,â he accuses into your shoulder blade, kissing its ridge and making you reconsider walking out the door entirely. âLemme have this.âÂ
Your second laugh is more subdued, and youâre right between his bed and desk when you lift both hands to hold him close. âYou have everything I got,â you wisp into his skin, planting your lips once, twice before you feel his arms press further in. âSo this is nothing.âÂ
Seconds and silence slide by, the delicate veil of early morning still hovering around the room. When Yoongi doesnât say anything, you make to turn and face him.Â
But youâre stopped before your heart skips.Â
âI could stay like this all day,â he admits, voice so low it rumbles through your bones. âAnd itâd be perfect.âÂ
âWhat, you donât wanna see my face?â You joke with a giggle. âRude, but thatâs fine.âÂ
Yoongi only buries his nose further, his glasses sliding against your skin peeking from his shirt. âIâm much braver right here, doll.âÂ
Oh.Â
The leap your heart does is more of a dive, plummeting into the seafoam swirling around your feet. All the words you want to respond with jump off right after, leaving you with nothing but the clouds in your eyes.Â
You donât quite know what he means by that. But it feels like those six words hold the weight of a thousand, so you simply let another kiss on his smooth forearm linger. âDo you want me to go with you?âÂ
A puff of laughter warms you right through and, despite his earlier admission, Yoongi does slowly spin you around.Â
And when you follow, you realize youâre much braver when you arenât facing him, too.Â
âItâs not that, babe,â he says through a dashing curve. âBut the offer was cute.âÂ
âI take it back then.âÂ
âDamn!âÂ
Both of your laughs whoosh out and collide, sweeping as Yoongi pinches your side and you flinch towards the bed. âYou fuckerâ!â
Before you know it, your back hits a comforter before a weight presses your stomach, emotions clashing as youâre elated and shy and immediately concerned for your boyfriendâs side. âBaby, be carefulââ
Lips capture yours, sucking up your warning before a hand slides under your head. Sighing, you arch into his chest, feeling the weight of his chains slip across your breasts.Â
Euphoria isnât an adequate enough word to describe how you feel. Where there used to be flutters in your ribcage now reside strong, powerful wing beats, gusts of want and desire lifting you off the ground and launching you into clear skies. Starlight of every color exists within each kiss you share, and your fingers feebly grab his tee to keep you from falling back down to earth.Â
âIf we donât go now,â Yoongi rasps before sliding his mouth against yours, âWeâre never going anywhere again.âÂ
âI know,â you whisper, willingly letting him kiss you once more, âIs that a promise?âÂ
âFuck, I wish.âÂ
You do, too. But you know youâre running out of time for what you need to do. And werenât you just saying you had to respect his aspirations? Shit, you really do need to snap out of it. âCome on,â you order with a pat to his chest. âWe have all week to do this. We got time.âÂ
Turns out, youâre still amongst the heavens. The way Yoongiâs looking at you? This is the closest youâll ever get to being held by an angel.Â
Did he get more handsome overnight? Or is it the light in his eyes sustained since his confession in the kitchen? You donât quite know, and you may never pinpoint why, but the tug he has on your heart spans space and time.Â
And youâll run through both forever to keep meeting him again and again.Â
Burns prick your eyes, but he mercifully stands before he can catch any evidence of your yearning.Â
Just like that, the two of you bounce back to getting ready, with him sliding notebooks and headphones in a backpack while you change into your own clothes. As you sling your bag over a shoulder, he reaches for the closest hoodie, and you wordlessly make your way to the front door.Â
You really do hope he gets looked at today. But just like the calm after a storm, you want to encourage him gently rather than shove him out. At least he seems receptive to your gentle suggestions.
But after you ask one more time and he simply nods, you lower your eyes to his kicks. âSorry if Iâm nagging. Iâd just worry less if you went right away, thatâs all.â
âYou arenât nagging, babe.â Your freshly bloomed lover reaches out to hold your wrist, smoothing a rough thumb over your skin. Fucking hell, you canât help but frown at the gashes and cuts marring his knuckles. âIâll go as soon as I can.â
Not just his hands, but his face. His ribs. And maybe other places you havenât even seen yet.Â
You donât wanna leave his side.Â
But you have to head out before your brother leaves. Things need to get patched up before he flies out into more stress, and you owe him an apology for walking out when he was still aching. Based on Yoongiâs physical state? Your brother could be hiding some big wounds and you didnât even wanna talk to him.Â
However. Was last night necessary? Absolutely. You cannot entertain the possible outcomes had you not tried hard enough to get through Yoongiâs door. His eyes were so dulled, his hands felt so cold. What would have happened if you didnât force yourself inside?Â
Why was that guitar smashed to pieces?Â
This is also why you refuse to leave. So many questions, so many things you still donât know. Like what all happened when you were separated? And how in the hell is this man in love with you?
âI donât wanna go,â you confess, instantly encased in his arms and warmth. âIâd much rather keep kissing you.âÂ
âTrue,â he says with a resigned huff, shifting his glasses with an adorable nose scrunch. If only he didnât have so many little red lines of conflict on his face. âBut we both have stuff to take care of, so letâs get all that done first.â
âUgh, fine.â Your groan is more teasing than serious, and Yoongiâs laugh is nothing but understanding.Â
Damn. You still feel it. You really donât wanna go. Be it the rawness of last night still on your skin, or the confessions still on your tongues, you just wanna stay by his side. âSorry,â you breathe out, lacing your fingers to pepper love along his strong, reddened ridges. âIâm serious. I donât wanna leave you right now.â
Walking out of Yoongiâs door just doesnât feel right. Even if heâs right there and will be following you out. Is this feeling normal? Are you supposed to feel this tightly woven to someone? Because the stitching between your hearts has only gotten stronger in the tempest of last night, as if you bonded together just to hold on for dear life.Â
Maybe thatâs exactly what happened. And itâs exactly why you can barely take one step out of his place.Â
âThen donât.â
Not one second passes before your chin is held, and lips slide so tenderly across yours that they may as well melt into your touch. Your reaction is quickly swooped into his mouth, and everything falls away as you let him seize your every thought. Lightning from last night zips out of your limbs, your toes, your fingers clasping his loose tee.Â
You might just cry where you stand.
How have his kisses gotten even better? How have you never felt this way even though youâve done this far more times than you were ever supposed to? It should be impossible, and yet, this man finds even more ways to astound you.Â
Yoongi slips a hand over your cheek, giving one more beautiful push of his lips as he confesses, âI donât wanna leave you, either.âÂ
And your breath stutters onto his features. âYou, too?â
Slow, he kisses your cheek, the clear rim of his specs skimming your nose. When he draws back, you look right into his eyes, wondering why heâs watching your mouth instead.Â
âMe, too.â Yoongi kisses your other side with a quiet peck. âFuck, me, too.âÂ
You fucking hate what you have to do, but you donât have a choice.Â
With one last lingering kiss, you both gather enough courage to set out and do what you must.Â
â
â
Your house is already a flurry of activity as you enter to see your brother in the kitchen, packing his leather duffle thatâs a constant companion on his trips.Â
Of course. The memory of him purchasing the lavish accessory pops into your head every time you watch him scurry around, dimples ever present on his proud cheeks. Itâs almost enough to make you smile yet again.Â
But you canât when the same face is currently scratched to hell. Just like Yoongiâs, if not worse.Â
Fuck, is he really gonna travel looking like that?Â
âHey,â he rasps out, still fighting off slumber. âYouâre back earlier than I thought.âÂ
âWanted to check on you before we left.â Fuck, your voice sounds like itâs being forced through a clogged pipe. Loosen the hell up! âAnd dude. Put some bandaids on, yeah?âÂ
âYeah, just give me a sec. Making sure I have everything before my ride gets here.âÂ
âHuh?â He got a ride? Youâre here now so you can take him to the airport. âYou sure you donât need me to drive you?âÂ
âYeah, itâs all good. I didnât know you were coming back.âÂ
Shit. His body seems just as angular as it did last night. Which, quite frankly, could still be from what went down in the lot.Â
Because even though you see both men banged up, you suddenly realize you donât actually know what all transpired.Â
After all, there wasnât much talk of it after you walked into the tempest of Yoongiâs living room.
Of course, you arenât gonna bring it up just this second. There are other things to ask about and make sure of first. âWallet? Phone? Passport?âÂ
âYup, yup, uhh.. Yup.âÂ
Zippers sling in the quiet morning air as you continue, âAnd youâre coming back on Friday, right?â
âOh.. Nah.â When you start crossing the kitchen, your brother hauls his leather bag over his better shoulder. Honestly, no one would be able to tell the other oneâs bruised with his suit on. That thing damn well covers everything except the cuts on his face and hands. âSaturday.âÂ
You pause in your journey to the medicine cabinet. âWait.. Saturday? The release partyâs on Friday.â
âYeah.. I know.â
What the fuck? Thatâs bullshit theyâre keeping him longer than they have to. Struggling to understand how corporate can keep your brother on a leash and get away with it, you urge, âTell them to at least let you go home a day early. Donât you wanna support your friends?â
âYou mean Yoongi?â
A zing of terror zips through your eyes, freezing every vein in an instant.Â
The fuck was that question? Never mind. Stay calm stay calm stay fucking calm. âUhh, yeah, heâs one of them? But the other guys, too, right? I know you care about them and this is huge.â
Mercifully, your sibling just shakes his head and waves you off. âDonât you think I already tried? I donât wanna miss it but I donât have a choice. Conference schedule is pretty tight and Iâm heading the panel on Friday.â
âIs it in the morning? You can fly out afterââ
âWhy are you fighting so hard?â
âWhy arenât you fighting harder!â
Okay, what in the hell is happening right now? Screw optics and how this must look for you, your brother needs to be there. Him and Yoongi are the tightest of friends, the most ride or die duo youâve ever seen. You canât picture a timeline where he misses this monumental moment, and itâs starting to really upset you that heâs barely trying.Â
âAlright, you know what?â Hard steps surge forward as you stand rigid, a duffle hastily dumped onto tile. âYou donât know what Iâve tried. You donât even know if I even told him yet.â
Fucking shit. You hold his stare before turning away, tossing out the idea of bandages entirely and searing footsteps into the hallwayâ
âOr do you.â
Before icing over with the unforgiving frost of zero gravity space.Â
Slow, you turn, not quite facing him but not backing down, either. ââŠExcuse me?â
âYou heard me. You talkinâ? What else has he been doing to you?â
Oh. Fuck that.Â
Doing to you?Â
Fuck all of this. This is too much to handle right now and you know youâre gonna snap if he keeps pushing because you are not having this conversation right before he leaves. Youâve already thought about this before, right? You cannot fuck with his head right before business trips because he needs to be on and locked in.Â
But now heâs fucking with your temper and those are some choice fucking words pulled out of his ass.Â
You donât think youâve ever legitimately threatened this man to his face and meant it before, and it tears a sharp corner of your heart, âYou better be very careful. With whatever you wanna say next.â
The air proves too thick to slice. While your body stands aflame, your brother is iced over, brimming with an energy that damn near takes physical form. âAll Iâm saying is? I find out some fucking bullshit is going onââ
No no no, not now.
Reacting fast is your only instinct, brain haywire and fizzling fizzling boiling. Harsh, you spin on your heel and shout the first thing you can think of, âOh, come onââ
âYou better hope to god youâre ready for whatâs comingââ
âStop!â Fuck fuck fuck, this is so frustrating because your head is exploding and your body is screaming to just tell him already. Fuck the consequences at this point this is ludicrous.Â
Doing to you? Yoongi? How dare he speak about his best friend like that how dare he accuse him without outright saying the words all you have to do is tell your brother how wrong heâs got it.Â
But you canât be the one. Yoongi said he would, and he probably took months to get to that point of strengthâand healing, from what you can tell.Â
This is between them. Them. You have to honor that, as much as you wanna just confess everything now and deal with it yourself.Â
But goddamn your brother is pulsing with anger and itâs leaking into your own charged air.Â
What does he think is happening? Does he think Yoongiâs just, what, playing you? Heâs wrong. Heâs so wrong. Yoongiâs been nothing but the best thing thatâs ever happened to you and shit your heart hurts becauseâŠ
Your brother is valid in thinking that.Â
How foolish. Didnât you guard your heart from Yoongi for the longest? Didnât everything start because you figured you knew who he was because of his reputation? You got him all wrong, too. So how can you be mad at your brother for doing the same?Â
Fuck, think. Just think before someone gets hurt.Â
Because if you arenât careful, someoneâor multiple someonesâwill get hurt in seconds. You have to bear the pain alone right now. To protect them both, you have to keep your trembling mouth shut.Â
And? You have to admit that something isnât fair here. Not to you, not to Yoongi, but to him. Last night was rough as fuck but, while you both got to have raw, beautiful closure, the one standing in front of you had to go to sleep in an empty house.Â
So chill the fuck out.Â
Breathing to cool down, you tense and loosen, tense and loosen. âI get it. Youâre angry, and you have a lot going on. But,â you bite down on your lip to keep going. âWeâre talking about something else. Weâre talking about you, and Iâm still pissed you even let those guys goad you into a fight. What are we, twelve?â
Seething, your sibling takes the switch of pace. But it is not what you want to hear. âAre you seriâ? What the hell was I supposed to do? That son of a bitch grabbed youââ
âI know,â you recoil. âDonât tell me like you were there, because you werenât.â
Finallyâfinallyâthose angry lines in his face vanish.Â
But they make way for something much worse than anger. Because your older brother, someone thatâs been there for you your whole life..Â
Looks absolutely stricken over the one time he wasnât.Â
Damn it.Â
Regretful, you drop your shoulders in exhaustion and quiet compromise. When you continue, your voice is much softer, âBut I told you: they were. Your friends, they were there because they knew you wanted that. Jimin got me away, Yoongi took me home and stayed.âÂ
You really have got to stop saying his name like you love him. It could start becoming too obvious.Â
Shuddering, you shift your weight, folding your arms and shrinking into yourself.Â
That night, despite Yoongiâs best and most gentle efforts, still clings to where that loser touched you at Dalo. You hate that you havenât gotten over it, and you loathe the way you still rub over the same spot. Over, and over. âWhat did you want him to do? Leave me here?â
âNo.âÂ
âExactly. And he didnât.â You adjust your stance again, making an impromptu gamble as you decide to let some truth leak out. Because your brother is owed at least this much. âAnd fine, you wanna know something? We do talk more because of it.â
Your brotherâs head snaps up, and you brace. Because if you show any shred of weakness or hesitation, heâll see right through your weak attempt to hide most of the truth,Â
âBut donât ever accuse him of doing anything to me. That was fucked up to say and you know it.â
âFuck.â In agreement, he rubs his hair back. âIt was. Iâm sorry.âÂ
âTrust me,â you swallow, hating that this is how things have to be for now. âYou have nothing to worry about. Heâs never.. Never done anything to me, anyway.âÂ
Itâs not a lie. Everything heâs done has been with you. For you. Because of you.Â
But your heartâs in anguish as it sinks. Because that expression on your older siblingâs face can only be one thing. Â
Pure. Utter. Relief.
Fire singes your eyes before you can quell the flame. Itâs the hardest technical truth to swallow.Â
Sure, he doesnât have anything to worry about as far as you being safe. And on top of that, he doesnât have to worry about any fake shit because Yoongi confessed to you last night.
But as far as his best friend sleeping with and now dating his sister behind his back? That is still very much sitting right in the center of the table.Â
And now youâre starting to see just how fucked all three of you are as soon as you sit down to eat the truth.Â
But Yoongi said heâd be the one to tell, so he will.Â
This feeling is so fucking miserable, though.Â
In the end, your brother is effectively convinced, raking a hand across his head and sighing. âJimin told me what all went down at Dalo, I just⊠Last night was⊠Fucked up.âÂ
âWell, yeah.â
âNo. See, this is just like what you said to me. You canât say it like you were there.â
Itâs your stomachâs turn to twist. âSo? You were scratched and bruised to hell, and YâŠâ Shut up, shut up. Youâre not supposed to know about the state of anyone else. âAnd you were⊠quieter.â
âBecause of what happened, dude.â
You blink. âWhat⊠What happened?â
Your brother looks at youâreally looks at you.Â
And suddenly, your gut flares in terror, storming in an instant across your abdomen.Â
âThat bitch pulled something on us.â
Your heart.Â
Itâs in freefall.
âWait⊠What?â You canât even form more than one syllable at a time, your legs turning gelatinous and knees starting to give out. âNo⊠What are youâŠ?â
What the fuck did he just say? That bitch pulled a what?Â
Your sibling slowly walks toward you once again, watching like heâs just waiting for you to say anything. Do anything.Â
But youâre a complete statue because all you can think about is the horror of something happening and the relief that nothing happened all at once.Â
Was Yoongi too scared to mention that part? Is this why he was holding back and shaking every time he reached out to touch you? Even this morning, he was soâŠÂ
Youâve never seen him like that. Is this why?Â
Your mind is swirling and crashing, overlapping each passing thought and scream running through your head. âIâm so sorry,â you hitch out, âI didnât know. Why didnât you say anything?â
âDidnât wanna scare you,â he sighs out. Putting both hands on his hips, your brother stops feet away, visibly still shook as he pierces wooden planks with his stare. âBut he pulled it right before Yoongi⊠and if it werenâtâŠFuck.âÂ
Burns flare and slice through your eyes when he has to pause. What is he trying to say? Pulled what?Â
Before Yoongi what?Â
Your brother continues, and your throat tightens. âIf it werenât for some random ass sirens, I⊠Things couldâve been so different.âÂ
What the fuck is happening. What the hell are you hearing?Â
âIt was probably dumb as fuck. But I was so fucking angry,â he grits out, watery eyes crushed looking your way. âSo fucking mad at how he was talking about you, I.. Walked right up to him and told him to fuck off.â
You canât even breathe.Â
âI still feel it,â he quietly adds, fingers pressed against his side. âRight here.âÂ
âFuck,â you finally choke out, eyes on fucking fire.Â
âBut all I knew was to keep you all safe,â he says, with hardened resolve and a wobbly chin. âAnd thatâs exactly what I did. I did that shit, even if that meantââÂ
Tears fling out of your eyes, flowing hot down your cheeks because you wouldnât want any of them to go out that way. Nothing happened nothing happened nothing happened and yet your body is acting as if something did and it hurts.Â
Your brother is there as soon as you crumple forward, letting you bury your head in his chest and sob your heart out. For him, for his friends, and for all the time you had with the man you love so, so dearly.Â
If anything happened to your brother before you came clean⊠If anything happened before you and Yoongi could evenâŠÂ
Suddenly, you feel equal weights of guilt. For running out on your brother. And for almost walking out on Yoongi.Â
You decide an apology is in order for both of them, and all the understanding in the world for Yoongiâs frosted demeanor as soon as you get him alone again.
And you are one hundred percent going to tell your brother everything once heâs back.Â
The tears cannot stop, and youâre sure you are crying unimpeded in a pressed and primmed suit. âIâm so sorry,â you keep repenting like a prayer. âThis is all my fault.â
âNoââ
âYou almostââ
âHey, stop.â He yanks you back, both of your faces soaked with saltwater. âWhat did I say before? I threw the first swing. You didnât do anything wrong.â
âBut it led to all this, I just.. I just feel so fucking stupid.â
âDonât. Hey, look at me.â Firm but gentle, he holds you at armâs length, forcing you to face him. âMaybe weâre both stupid, but you werenât the idiot. I was.âÂ
You feel so many conflicting things in your soul.Â
What would you have done if Yoongi was in critical condition? What would you have done differently if your brother was instead? Are they the same? Are the two situations really so different anymore?Â
No they arenât they arenât they arenât.Â
âPlease donât do that again,â you shake out. âEven if it was for me, if I ever lost you, I...âÂ
âYou know I canât promise anything.â He furrows his brows when you eye him with anger and sadness. âBut nothing like that is happening again. Especially with the same dudes.âÂ
âOkay.âÂ
A vicious tornado of emotions sends your whole body into agonizing pain. This isnât what you expected at all, and itâs causing your limbs to lock at the bends. Too many scenarios are jangling about yet you canât ask for specifics because that will just make it even more real.Â
A nightmare is somehow better once you know it ends with you waking up. âIâm⊠gonna need some time to process everything.â
âI know. And I wasnât planning on saying anything, but⊠You deserve to know the things I get into.âÂ
Ah.Â
The irony is not lost on you.Â
âAt least, if they involve you. We learned our lesson. You were right to tell us off.â
God. You feel numb.Â
âThanks,â you murmur, suddenly immensely tired. âI think I need more sleep.â
A blaring honk sounds outside the house, and you both flinch at the noise.Â
And your throat burns at the way your brother instinctively swept you behind his back.Â
When you realize what it is, you know what has to come next.Â
And heâs the first to react as he turns to face you again, âAlright. Iâm heading out, just remember to go get my baby when sheâs fixed, yeah?â
âDo you have to go?â
Wait.
The question seems to startle him as much as it does you.Â
How did you blurt it right out before even registering the words? Why does your heart clench at the sight of those eyes looking so pained?Â
Why does everything feel so shaky within these walls that were always your home?
âI do,â he says, voice tight. âIâm sorry.âÂ
And why the fuck do you feel sad heâs leaving?
âNo, no, itâs.. Of course you have to.â You canât help the lump in your throat from bobbing, the regret in your limbs as they barely move at your side. âI dunno why I asked, I guess I just..âÂ
Thereâs no response to your sniffle.Â
âSorry for yelling,â you squeak out. âI just feel really queasy.â
For a lot more reasons than one.
âWe all made it out,â your brother whispers. âThatâs what matters.â
âWill you⊠Will you at least try to be back for the party?â
The man swallows with his brows knit tight, then attempts to crack the tiniest smile. âYou know I will. Thatâs my guy.âÂ
âOkay.â You nod, sniffling again. After what he just told you? You know heâll do anything for the ones he loves. âSee you there.â
Your brother rubs a comforting palm over your head before turning, heading for the door and grabbing his leather duffle.Â
When he stops to glance at you one more time, you give a little wave of your hand before watching the door click shut.Â
Chest caving as you collapse to the ground in tears.Â
â
â
The need to call Yoongi burns so harshly your fingers damn near set your top aflame.
But heâs at work, and you canât fuck things up right when youâre approaching the finish line. You almost did with your brother, and that gave you twelve heart attacks in the span of minutes.Â
Still. Your chest aches so much that a thirteenth could very well be approaching. You donât even realize youâre bracing the hallway wall for support until you try to stand, back sore and aching from bending so far for so long.Â
What did your brother mean to say about Yoongi? What did that coward pull on them? Do you even want to know what happened?Â
Fighting back tears, you reach down for your phone, shakily typing out a message only to erase it. Then again. And again.Â
And again.Â
Giving up, you forcefully swallow all your worries, cringing at the bitterness of the unknown and the burnt molasses of hidden truths.Â
Itâs going to be okay. No matter what you think or imagine in your head, they made it out, they made it out, they are all alive.Â
Thatâs the only reason you can move forward, each step getting you from your room. To your bathroom.Â
And back again.Â
â
â
After showering, you feel lighter and refreshed, though the soreness between your legs has yet to leave.Â
But you wouldnât want it any other way, as itâs another reminder of Yoongiâs apparent brush with survival. His broken living room spurned the creation of your bond, your devotion to him as he confessed before you gave him your utmost trust in his sheets.Â
The end is so close. As soon as this week is over, youâll rip the last bit of peel from your pair of tangerines, baring all truths to your brother and facing the consequences.Â
Finally ready, you head to your car, opening your text threads with a plan: start slow.Â
Start with something that can be interpreted neutrally if anyone saw it on his phone screen, especially if your headstrong ex is in the room.Â
You [12:31pm]: how are you feeling?
Yoongi [12:34pm]: 1 AttachmentÂ
You close your door with brows furrowed.Â
Yoongiâs at the hospital?Â
Thatâs not what you expected at all.Â
Your chest swells with relief knowing heâs there, but you also wanna make sure heâs feeling okay. Especially his mental state after whatever the fuck your brother just dropped on you before leaving.Â
Goddamn, thatâs going to gnaw at your brain until you find the right time and right amount of courage to ask about it. Because itâs very possible Yoongi wonât tell you.Â
Because itâs probably something he knows you wonât like.Â
Fuck.Â
You [12:34pm]: Loved an Attachment
You [12:34pm]: thank you for listeningđ€ still sore?
Yoongi [12:35pm]: Yeah, but not bad. Just there.
Wait. Heâs not at the studio. That means you canâ
Yoongi: Outgoing Call
âHey.â
âHey,â you slowly say as you pull out into the street. âIâm driving now so this is easier.â
âCourse. You going to Taeâs?â
âMaybe. Iâm going to Yuriâs first.â You swallow, realizing that you didnât tell him about what you let slip before driving over. âI.. Told her. About you.â
Thereâs a little bit of silence on the line, just some adjustments and muffled speaker sounds. âSorry, just writing this down. Whatâs wrong with that?â
You huff through your nose. Gotta be those patient forms that always take forever to fill out. âOh. Just more and more people knowing, is all.âÂ
âEveryoneâs gonna know eventually.âÂ
You hold back a small smile. Because heâs right. âYeah. Iâm just tired of this feeling.â
âLike youâre hiding something.â
Itâs your turn for silence. He doesnât know how accurately that was played out today. The only answer you can provide is a curt, âExactly.â
âSame.â
Wings beat around your heart again.Â
He wants this. Yoongi really, really wants this. And years ago, that outcome wouldnât have even crossed your mind as an option.Â
âThank you for going, baby.â
âThe guys made me.â
You hum. âWhich ones.â
After a pause, you hear a puff of amusement. âAll of them at some point today, actually.âÂ
All of them? Does that include your brother? Did they talk about the trip already?
Your laugh is bittersweet. âWell. Glad to know you can be forced by everyone else except me.â
âHey, I was already gonna go because of you!â Yoongi quietly retorts, and you giggle at the pout in his words. âJust wanted to get a headstart on work first.â
You were right. He really does wanna go all out for his musical endeavors.Â
Itâs extremely admirable, and wildly attractive, but it does come to a point. âAs much as I love your passion, old man, I wanna keep you upright.â
He laughs soft into the line, and you think you can listen to that specific sound on an infinite loop. âThatâs fair.âÂ
âHow long is it gonna take, you think?â
âDunno. But Iâll keep myself busy until Iâm out.â
Of course he will. You donât doubt he wonât waste any time. Didnât he bring journals in his backpack? You wouldnât be surprised if he wrote ten thousand songs before being called in. âJust call me if you need anything, please?â
âOf course, babe.â
âThank you,â you say with utmost sincerity. âIf only my brother would be less stubborn and get checked, too.â
âHeâll probably do it once he gets there.â
âDid you convince him?â
âNah. But once he knows I did, heâll do it.â
âFigures.â You scoff. âOkay, Iâm almost there. Let me know how it goes.â
âK. Bye, doll.â
You didnât ask him what went down. But itâs not the time nor place, and you have plenty of chances this week to figure out when that would beâif at all.Â
âTalk soon.âÂ
â
â
For a normally bustling household, Yuriâs house is quiet.Â
So itâs not shocking when you walk into the kitchen and see all your friends glance your way, slowly vacating their chairs with eyes never leaving your face. Even Reia is on high alert.Â
Did Yuri tell her? Did Yuri tell anyone else?Â
No. Sheâs a talker and loves spilling, but she promised. And when she promises something, you know you can trust her to keep it.Â
Itâs what pours emotion in your voice as you meekly greet, âHey, guysââ
A crushing hug closes your throat. Yuriâs the one that gets to you first, with Reia and Dominique waiting their turns to offer you healing, relieved embraces.Â
âWhat happened?âÂ
âScared us half to death.â
Dom puts you at armâs length to give a once over, noting your face rubbed raw and eyes still a little bloodshot. Thankfully, her pupils hold more concern than disappointment. âYou good?â
Your eyes wobble alongside your smile, and you think itâs enough proof. âMore than that,â you still decide to whisper, and your heart beats again at her reaction.Â
âThank god. I was ready to kick your ass if you werenât.â
Heading up to Yuriâs room, you all wait until the door is swung back before mounting her canopy bed, sitting in a tight circle as you divulge everything.Â
Well. Almost everything.Â
You tell them that Yoongi is the one youâve been seeing, how you went to check on him last night in a panic, and the terrifying reason why. When you mention the fight after the basketball game, all three of your friends erupt in questions, and you have to assure them everything turned out okay. Honestly, you also do this to assure yourself, too.Â
âSo⊠Your brotherâs just fine with all of this?â Reia asks, not noticing the tick of Domâs jaw.Â
âWell,â you start with a higher pitch, earning a pair of groans. âHe doesnât exactly know yetââ
âYup. Heâs gonna murder him.â
âYeah, should we say our condolences now or..â
âHow long has this been going on?â Reia fires off another question that digs into your chest. âWas he the one you were seeing the whole time?â
âYes,â you admit with a sigh. âI shouldâve told you guys from the beginning, but. The whole thing just felt so delicate. But! We just started making things official recently, so..âÂ
Dom turns your way. âOfficial how?â
Well. Here goes everything.Â
With a shaky breath, and lingering feelings from the time it happened, you reveal with watery eyes, âYoongi⊠Told me he loves me.â
Both Yuri and Reia react in yelps, Domâs gaze lowering as the girls reach to grab your hands.Â
Wait. Whatâs going on with her? Sheâs the one that knows the most, sheâs the one that covered for you all those months ago. She has to be the one that is the least surprised at all this.Â
Blinking, you note to confront her about it later. Right now, youâre too focused on trying not to cry as your friends tumble out questions and support,Â
âHe said it? Did you say it first or did he?âÂ
âHow did it happen! Oh, Iâm so happy for you, babeââÂ
âThankâthank you, Yuri,â you squeeze out as she hugs you close. âI couldnât believe it, but he just.. Said it. We werenât even doing anything, I was just.. Looking up what injuries he could have..âÂ
And he confessed in the most Yoongi fashion he could have.Â
Looking back, it shouldnât shock you at all. Heâs always found ways to sweep you off your proverbial feet, so why would a confession plucked from the heavens be any different?Â
She lets you go before wiping her eyes, Reia and even Dom now sporting watery pupils, too.Â
âAs much as Iâm upset at you for not telling us, Iâve never been so happy for you.â When Yuriâs features crease in another sob, you sniffle along with the rest. âItâs been so long since you⊠And you really.. Fuck.âÂ
You know what sheâs trying to say, and the realization has your throat constricting so tight.Â
Itâs been forever since youâve had something like this, someone like this. When you and Jungkook were together, you told him that you loved him before he broke it off.Â
Sure, you bought the rings together, but he never uttered those words until years after when it didnât even matter. And all your relationships after his were complete and utter bullshit, so you donât think you ever even heard those three words and knew them to be true.Â
Yoongi was the first to ever say them so sincerely.Â
And that fact makes your ducts burn and burn.Â
And when Yuri finally speaks, it breaks the dam holding your real deluge back,Â
âI canât think of anyone else that deserves to be loved more than you.âÂ
All at once, everything streams out as you hunch forward. The pain of everything youâve endured, the hopelessness of knowing youâd most likely end up alone, the excruciating prospect of a future that you never deemed bright, or peaceful, or comforting.Â
And to think that even this man couldâve been snatched away from you in a snap? Even more tears overlap with the ones youâre shedding, and you canât even reach out to hug all three beautiful, angelic souls surrounding you with tight arms and sobs because your limbs lock at all bends.Â
Itâs the exact release you need. All your friends supporting you, all the pent up anxiety of last night and today, the truth setting itself free in some capacityâall in the comfort of a plushie-laden bed you only doubted yourself in last time.Â
Everythingâs gonna be alright. It has to be. Youâre gonna fight for the ones you love, even if a war between them is inevitable.Â
It takes a few minutes of heavy silence for you all to separate, swiping and rubbing tears while letting out happy sniffles.Â
When you thank them for being understanding, they assure you itâs okay. And when you say youâre going to tell your brother soon, a force from the doorway has all of you leaping from lilac sheets,Â
âTell him what?âÂ
Jia stands firm with a laundry basket at her hip, and Yuri scoffs at her older sister for barging in. âA knock wouldâve been nice!âÂ
Fuck!Â
You canât tell Jia of all people. If you spill anything about Yoongi, sheâs one hundred percent going to tell your brother. Theyâre the same age, and run in pretty tight circles, so of course you are not going to risk it.Â
But you can tell her something else youâre going to tell your older sibling, so you fire out a half-truth,Â
âTell him not to pick any other fights that could get him killed.âÂ
Jiaâs eyes zoom to your wrecked face, and she drops the laundry with haste before asking, âWhat happened? When? Tell me now.âÂ
Huh. Maybe your brother has a type, if heâs still into Jia like he said before.Â
You feel a little spark in your chest as you let her know they all got in a scuffle after the basketball game, and another pang as she immediately abandons the room and clothes with a fierce declaration,Â
âIâm gonna kill them myself!âÂ
âDonât worry, I already hounded my brother!â You call out after her, sighing as Yuri shakes her head with a smile. âShe gets like that when sheâs really worried, huh.âÂ
âYeah..â Your friend leans to look around you, noticing the basket left alone on the ground. âAnd if sheâs super fired up, she drops everything and doesnât stop until itâs handled. Clearly.âÂ
Maybe both older siblings really are similar.Â
The firestorm of an interruption seemed to break the tension in the room, with all of you finally relaxing and catching up. When they ask you questions, you answer what you can.Â
And when you divulge information that has your ears burning, their squeals and yells give you whole new reasons to live.Â
â
â
After a very comforting lunch Yuriâs mom cooked, you head to the bathroom when your phone suddenly vibrates through your palm.
Huh? Thatâs weird. You expect the name on your screen to be Taehyung, not Yoongi.Â
Not that itâs a bad thing. Youâve been waiting to hear from him, so this is a pleasant surprise.Â
Closing the door to the guest bathroom, you gaze at the calming sage decor with a smile. âHi, how did itââ
âYouâre coming over later, right?â
Oh, shit. Is he okay?
âYes, baby,â you respond with a soothing lilt, ears perked and body on high alert.Â
Does he think you arenât anymore? You both decided on the plans earlier. Surely he knows youâd never just flake on him. âIâm coming back once youâre done with work, remember?â
Thereâs an uncomfortable pause on the line, which makes your boyfriendâs next question jab you so far in the lungs you canât breathe,
ââŠCan it be now?â
Shit.Â
Just like Jia earlier, you drop every plan you have to the wayside. Youâre sure that Taehyung will understand, and you already got through the biggest conversation you needed to with your friends.Â
âOf course,â you whoosh out. âLemme just say bye and Iâll go.âÂ
âTake your time.â A small shuffling interrupts. âItâll take me a bit to get back.âÂ
âOkay. See you there.âÂ
The strained urgency in his voice makes your hair stand on end, so you vacate the bathroom to inform the girls that you gotta goâbut not without a quick head tilt towards Dom, who follows you outside and into the afternoon sun. Â
â
â
You wait until youâre next to your car on the street, turning with a concerned expression and jittery nerves, âWhatâs up with you? Did I do something wrong?â
Turns out, you read Dominique correctly. Her jaw locks before loosening, and it reminds you of the time she confronted you about Yoongi before. God, how much has changed since then. That feels like ages and ages ago.Â
âItâs not about you,â your best friend clears the air and the tightness in your shoulders. âIâm just.. Glad he came around.â
âYoongi?â When Dom nods, you blink. âWait, what?â
âAt your house that night.. After he left your room, we hadâI dunno, a heart-to-heart.â She sighs, flicking braids over her shoulder. You note to compliment the beads she chose this time, because they remind you of summer and simpler times. âI mightâve pressured him a bit, and.. I think he wanted to tell me that he loved you. All the way back then.âÂ
Something in your heart stutters, and you can only repeat your last question, âWhat?â
âYeah. Something about needing to do something first,â she continues, holding your gaze with perfect brows furrowed in sunlight. âBut I could tell he was damn serious about whatever it was. And if he was willing to do it for you? I let it go.âÂ
Your mind whirls.Â
Yoongi was already in love with you back then? Is that why he needed to let you go? To deal with whatever he had to do?Â
One side of you breaks thinking he had to go through all that alone; the other side is screaming at his past self for not even giving you a choice. What did he go through? What did he have to do?
Now you really have to see him. Immediately.Â
âThank you, Dom,â you rush out while opening your door. âIâm just happy itâs over.â
âThe hell itâs not.â Shooting you a glare that heats the oncoming breeze, she reminds, âItâs not over until your brother knows. And based on everything thatâs happened? That conversation is not gonna go over well.âÂ
A dark, simmering boil starts in your stomach, and youâre already feeling queasy again. Tightening your door handle, you gulp hard. âI know.âÂ
âTrust me, Iâm happy for you both. I am.â Both hands find her hips as she levels a gaze that you really, really donât enjoy. âBut Iâm gonna be honest, I think this is gonna ruin their friendship for good.âÂ
Both of your lungs clamp shut.Â
âPlease donât say that,â you beg, âIâm gonna fight for all of us. I will.âÂ
âI donât doubt that, babe. Hey, uh uh, come here.â Reaching out, she gives you a tight hug just when you feel fragile again.Â
âListen to me. I donât doubt that,â she says into your shoulder. âIâm just here to be realistic. Just donât be shocked if thatâs how it goes. Weâll be here for you no matter what, too.âÂ
âOkay,â you say with a scrunched face into her scent. God, she always smells so good, and itâs almost enough to calm you down. Almost almost almost. âThank you. But Iâm not giving up.âÂ
âThatâs my girl.â She squeezes you one more time. âI love you.âÂ
With eyes searing over, you choke and grip her tighter. âI love you, too.âÂ
â
â
Yoongiâs door warms your back as you wait for him to show.Â
But thereâs a good chance it can just be your volcanic anxiety.Â
Ever since your arrival, youâve paced, youâve gnawed on your lips, youâve had to shake the nerves out of your hands.Â
And over and over, youâve strained your neck to look for your favorite cat, because you could sincerely use even a glimpse of her right now.Â
While she doesnât end up showing, Yoongi rounds the nearest corner minutes after your last desperate scan.Â
Fuck, heâs so handsome.Â
Even now, as he simply walks toward you with a backpack slung over his shoulder, you watch with undying yearning to feel those flowing bangs over his forehead. Youâd even settle for a single touch of his cheeks, one of them currently sporting a thin bandage.
But the closer Yoongi gets, the quicker your admiration morphs into concern. Thereâs a deep bend in his brows that you canât decipher, and his fist is balled pretty tight.Â
Seriously, what happened? He looks so troubled that you slowly push off the doorway to ask,Â
âBaby, whatâsââ
A bag hits the ground before youâre swooped into a kiss so electric your lips spark.Â
Him. Him, him, and more him. For the love of everything you donât understand whatâs happening but you kiss Yoongi back with everything you have, arms slinging around his strong shoulders and tugging him closer because he clearly needed this.Â
And fuck if you didnât need it just as much. Screw it if anyone sees you. This is all you want and youâll stay right here until he pulls away.Â
When he finally does, both of you swallow to catch your breaths, and your soul glimmers when his forehead meets yours.Â
âHi, baby,â you whisper to his exhales. âMissed you, too.â
Silent, your lover kisses your forehead before hugging you close, and youâre more sure of your prediction than ever. Something is bothering him.Â
He doesnât look worse, at least. But thereâs clearly something off and heâs not hiding it. His lack of words is loud enough.Â
âLetâs go inside,â you quietly suggest. âI wouldâve gone in already but I donât have a key.â
He nods, fishing out his keyring to let you both inside.Â
When you set your bags down and slip off your shoes, itâs only seconds before youâre softly pulled into a hug again, surprising yet so, so welcoming.Â
Even only after a few hours, youâve missed the fuck out of him. Which makes all of this an outright dream.Â
âSorry,â Yoongi finally murmurs against your shoulder. âI justâŠâ
âNothing to be sorry for.â You stroke a hand along his hair, massaging his scalp and loving how soft it feels. The windswept strands fall back into place as you keep running your fingers through. âDid you at least get your appointment?â
âYeah, I did.â He buries his face further. âNothing bad. Just canât lift anything heavy for a couple days.â
âGood. Thatâs easy to manage,â you whisper back into his tee, feeling the chill of lingering air conditioning and body warmth all at once. âIs something else bothering you?â
âNot exactly.â Whatever that means. âIâll tell you about it later. Just wanted this, and you.â
Oh. ThatâsâŠÂ
âIâm here now, love,â you assure with a melting heart, wondering what happened to cause this behavior.Â
Is it because of last night? Or something that happened today? Youâre anxious all over again, but from the way Yoongiâs acting, your worries are second to his. âHave you eaten yet?â
He shakes his head, only pulling you closer with not a word from his lips.Â
And from this point on, you make a silent vow to yourself. Whatever Yoongi needs, youâre going to take care of him.Â
No matter what, these next few days are all about himâa minuscule sacrifice in comparison to everything heâs done for you, whether you knew about it or not.
âIâll make you something then. Come on.âÂ
When you walk, you slip your hand down his arm to hold his hand, and your lead into his kitchen is short.Â
âAny requests?â You cheerfully ask as you spare a smile over your shoulder. âWe can do⊠Something lightâŠâ
Only to see him staring back with nothing but a lingering sense of longing.
Okay.Â
You need to get to the bottom of this now.Â
Stopping right over linoleum, you leave no room for arguments, âYoongi. Tell me whatâs wrong.â
He blinks before his gaze meets the floor. So youâre confused when he simply, quietly..Â
Laughs?Â
âItâs not that somethingâs wrong,â he slowly starts, a shy smile carving his features. âFor the first time in my life, nothingâs wrong.âÂ
Your heart beats extra loud.Â
âBut itâs too much to explain right now.â His eyes rise to meet yours. âJust know that Iâm so in love with you.âÂ
Oh.
âAnd I want you to know that every day I live.â
Fuck.
Your body responds before you can say anything, lips connecting to remove any need for speech. The knowledge of them all staring death in the face last night makes this confession sear your insides, and you canât help but kiss him like youâll never get to again.Â
Yanking him back, you spin on your heel until he flings into the kitchen, clutching your wrists before gripping your jaw with both hands.Â
His mouth heats on yours, his glasses the only barrier between your skin. Everything sizzles from your head to your toes, and you both bang into a countertop beforeâ
âFuck, ouch.â
âShit, you okay?â
Yoongi rubs his side with one eye pinched shut, a corner of his teeth present. âYeah. Worth it, though.â
âBe serious,â you reprimand. Looks like heâs gonna have to take it easy, which means no going at it like animals until heâs on the mend. âNo more until you feel better, yeah?â
âSays who?â
âBabe.â
His deadly pout almost breaks your resolve. âFine.âÂ
But you can wait. Youâre sure it wonât take long, and for this man? Youâll wait however long you need to.Â
Besides, thereâs plenty of things you can do in the meantime that donât require running into hard objects.Â
âGood. Now letâsâŠâ You turn away to get started before youâre held, and pulled back into yet another embrace.Â
What the hell is happening today? Your lungs and your melting pile of a brain can only take so much. Itâs beautifully overwhelming how Yoongi canât seem to let you go, because youâre the one that always loses control.Â
This whole time, itâs been you that canât hold yourself back.Â
So now? Being on the other side? You donât think you ever want him to restrain himself again.Â
This time, he moves slow. Sensuously slow, and it would occur to you that heâs finding a very cheeky loophole to your plan if you werenât so hazy-eyed.Â
Whatever Yoongiâs doing, you wonât stop him.Â
Your back touches a counter before Yoongi cages you in, and your lips mold together as perfectly as his body does with yours. Your unhurried strokes match his, and your minds communicate without a single word.Â
Thereâs yearning still ever present. But thereâs comfort in abundance, and a whole new level of need.Â
After he pulls away, you can visibly see him drink you in from head to toe.Â
âYou know.. Iâm good holding off on all the other shit.â Pulling you in, his lips curve as he confidently declares, âBut Iâm never gonna stop kissing you.âÂ
His hands, his lips, his words. They all have healing powers, youâre so sure of it. If Yoongi hasnât yet realized his unending pain has blossomed into a safe haven, you need to let him know no matter what,Â
âGood.â
Thereâs still a pining in his eyes, but he lets you free, hand skirting your hip before he walks to his room. âGonna change then Iâll help.âÂ
âYou donât have to, baby,â you say as you struggle to catch your breath. âI got it.âÂ
Three minutes later, heâs chopping an onion anyway.Â
But youâre loving how serene everything feels with the two of you prepping and dicing, thumps of knives on wood intertwining in sound before you laugh at his crying over the pesky vegetable. Maybe if he wore contacts instead of specs, heâd be better off.Â
Not that his choice of eyewear is what youâre complaining about. But those glasses paired with the cream tees heâs been wearing? There will be hell to pay as soon as you get a chance at revenge.Â
Your pot is set to boil for a bit, so you finally rest against the counter and start a timer on his microwave. âGo ahead,â you gesture to your very handsome cooking partner. âYou can sit now.â
âHuh? Weâre not done yet.â
âOh.â Blinking, you tilt your head in confusion because you couldâve sworn you heard him yawn a couple times. âYou arenât tired?â
âI am,â he says before squeezing his eyes, rapid blinks to follow. âBut Iâm fine here.â
You toss and turn the food around, sprinkling a little more seasoning and hearing the bubbles and fizzes. When you stir a little more, a sudden thought occurs, halting your movements and spinning you around,Â
âAre you staying there to watch my ass.â
Yoongiâs slow smile gives everything away, but he also makes up for the blatant staring.Â
âCanât deny thatâs one of the things.â Pushing off the sink, he stands right next to you, slotting a hand behind your neck and angling you for a kiss. âBut I meant it earlier. I justâŠâ
Youâre completely silent as you watch him slide his eyes from your face to the sizzling food. Whatever heâs thinking about, youâre gonna give him all the room to talk.Â
âJust like being where you are.âÂ
How you went from almost running out of his door to here, you arenât quite sure. But youâre grateful for that split second of him deciding to fight for the two of you instead of against, because you really were going to leave.Â
And you may have taken much, much longer to even try going back.Â
Your voice is barely heard over the aromatic smell and fizzle, âGood thing I like having you around.â When he smiles again, you let out a breath of a giggle, going back to shuffling the pan around and tilting your head to the fridge. âI put some fruit in there if you wanna eat that, too.â
âIâm down.â
âK.â
Your food is ready soon enough, and the two of you eat while talking about easy topics. Like work and your workplace dynamics, what Yoongiâs team has been working on at the studio.Â
At one point, your curiosity about the album release party grows from something he says. âSpeaking of. The partyâs on Friday, right?â
âYeah.â
âOkay, I thought so,â you deflate, setting your bowl down on the table. âSorry he canât go.â
âHuh?â
Your body stills. âWait. Did he not say anything? About his trip being extended?â
So much for nothing in his life being wrong. From the lost look on his face, you may have given him another reason to fold back in on himself. âNo.. No, he didnât.â
Both of you sit in silence.Â
This could be nothing. Right? That means your brother is confident he can make it so thereâs no point in telling Yoongi heâs gonna miss it. Or maybe heâs not trying hard enough and then not being able to say it to his face?Â
âIâm sorry,â you apologize. âI thought he told you.â
âItâs okay.â Clearly itâs not. âNot much to do about it now.â
âYoongi⊠What if he knows?â At your own question, you stiffen, curling into a proverbial ball. Fear and the sick backfire of fibbing has your mouth going drier than desert air. âWhat if he actually knows?â
Setting down his chopsticks, Yoongi looks your way, eyes unreadable behind his specs. âIf he did, do you think heâd leave us alone?â
Heâs got a point. âGuess not.âÂ
âMm.â Flicking his eyes to the window, he adjusts uncomfortably in his chair. âAnd I dunno if I mentioned this, but.. He thinks I got back with my ex.â
âFuck, really?âÂ
âThatâs the real reason why he hasnât been talking to me. Maybe he thinks sheâs gonna be there on Friday.â
âOh.â Your shoulders sag, and sag. Not owning up to your relationship is one thing; Yoongi having to dwell in his previous relationship is another. âIs that⊠worse?â
âShit.â Reaching across wood, you close your hand around his fingers for support. Itâs the only thing you can think to do. At least, itâs what you would want if you were in his shoes. âI think you should tell him she wonât be.â
A million seconds later, Yoongi thankfully agrees. âYeah, I will.â
You feel better. Somewhat. At least a little less nauseous about the possibility of your brother knowing.Â
But it still sucks knowing that heâs actively avoiding Yoongi because of an ex he used to have.Â
How bad was it back then if this is the case? What exactly happened? Is this why Yoongi went radio silent on you for weeks?
It seems like he doesnât even wanna talk about her. So you wonât pry just yet, as much as you wanna know every single thing sheâs done wrong so you can hound her through every timeline in existence.Â
Instead, you talk about a much better subject,Â
âWe should feed my cat now.â
And you quickly laugh at the saucy glint in Yoongiâs eyes.Â
â
â
Everything is set where it needs to be. Sugarâs food and water fill their respective bowls, your shoulder leans into Yoongiâs good side, and his arm rests around your back as heâs propped up by his banged up doorway.Â
You remember the first time you saw him lean against the wood like this. Only that time, you were a shell of a girl, waiting with shaky breaths and shaken confidence to hear his response to your inappropriate request.Â
Who wouldâve thought that youâd be on the same side as him all these months later? In his arms, resting a head on his warm chest?Â
When you let out a short chuckle, Yoongi turns to your smile. âHmm?âÂ
âNothing,â you wisp out. âJust thinking about us.âÂ
His fingers press into your side a fraction more, and you can feel him lift his head again. âMe, too.âÂ
Umm.Â
You can say things like that. He isnât allowed!Â
Youâre about to set some one-sided rules before your gift pops out of the bushes a few feet away.Â
âMy baby!â you quietly call, leaving Yoongiâs side to crouch down. âCome here, love. You hungry?â
She cautiously makes her way over, sniffing your hand when you leave it outstretched. After careful consideration, the little one nudges your palm, letting you glide fingers down her back as she approaches her bowls.Â
âYouâre so tiny,â you observe with slight pity. âWeâll get you well fed in no timeââ
âHey, Sugar! Oh, is this her? Sheâs gorgeous, no wonder!â
Huh? Sugar?Â
Who else knows the catâs name already?
Your neck almost strains when you look up to see whoâs talking. When you notice an older lady donning a really comfy, fluffy robe, you feel like it looks super familiar before you stand.Â
âHi,â you greet before introducing yourself, extending your hand and shaking the womanâs soft, delicate fingers. âSorry if we were too loud.â
âCall me Miss Dion. And you werenât too loud this time, sweetie,â she says with a wink, glancing down at the kitty eating what you laid out. âWas just cominâ out to water my plants so itâs good to see youâre here, too. Looks like he finally got some sense back in that head of his.â
âIâm standing right here, you know.â
âOh, I know!â
Back? How long has she known about you? Do her and Yoongi actually converse regularly? Their banter is⊠Really adorable.Â
Itâs making you fall even more in love with the man biting his cheek in amusement.Â
Wait.Â
Is Yoongi Sugar?Â
That is so fucking cute you could cry.Â
âIâm back to take care of this guy,â you explain with a head tilt. âAnd the little one, of course.âÂ
Itâs when you say this that Miss Dion notices the bandages on Yoongiâs face, concern pushing down her brows. âWhat happened to you, young man?â
âNothing to worry about.âÂ
âYou sure? I got some ointment in my kitchen somewhereââ
âItâs all goodââ
âWeâll take it,â you cut him off, not looking but feeling his stare on your face. âHow much do we owe you?âÂ
âOh, donât you worry about that.â With a snuff at Yoongi and a smile your way, Miss Dion heads inside to fetch a bottle.
In the meantime, you give your lover a quiet stare before bending down to run your hands over soft fur.Â
âPapa Sugar is gonna need that so he canât argue,â you coo to your cat, cheekily ignoring Yoongiâs sputtering puff of air above your head.
âPapa Sugar? Really?â
You glance up to his smile with a mischievous one of your own. âWhat, you wanna be Sugar Daddy instead?â
The swirl in your belly is instant. Because Yoongi can only look out into the distance, biting his lip and failing to hide his grin.
Sigh. If only he didnât have those injuries across his face. Youâd push him back into the door and slam it shut if it was any other day.Â
Patience, patience, patience.Â
Those hits arenât gonna heal with just one round of gauze.Â
When you have to replace the cotton patches, at least youâll have something to help.Â
â
â
Itâs not until youâre about to tuck in for the night that Yoongi approaches your side of the bed. Judging by the headphones slung around his neck, heâs about to work, so you assume heâs just coming to give you a kiss goodnight.Â
But after he does exactly that, he asks you a question that warms your chest,Â
âWhereâs your keys.âÂ
âIn there,â you motion to the nearest wall, bag propped right under his windowsill. âInside pocket, I think.âÂ
Yoongi bends with a prolonged grunt, slowly rummaging until he finds your jangling keyring with its charms. When he grabs it, he silently sits on the edge up against your stomach, body heat permeating your tee while he fiddles with the clasps.Â
God, youâre so in trouble. You know exactly what heâs doing.Â
Unlike the last time he offered you complete access to his place, this time he didnât even hesitate. And the way he secures a key amongst the loop, itâs his silent way of cementing permanence.Â
Thatâs not another key for you to borrow.
Because that key is yours.
â
â
continued in angel, pt. 2
pitstop inbox before pt2!! | join the server!
a/n: holy crap we're doing it we are actually back in the main storyline?! how do we feel right now because i am over the damn moon diving into this story again. here's a slight pitstop before you make your way over to part two (THE CONTINUATION IS IN A REBLOG!) so take a breather before heading into the resttttttt
++ feedback box:
â„ of course, any reblogs/comments/messages are appreciated!
â„ for the ones that are too shy to reblog with a review, comment on this, or send a message, i went ahead and made another anonymous form where you can send in what you think!
â„ no emails collected, no need to put in a username. itâs literally just a comment dropbox :D feedback can be as short/sweet or as long as youâd like!
â„ here!
++ more links:
â„ masterlistÂ
â„ three tangerines masterlist
a/n 2: we did this for 3tanfugue and the energy was great! just like last time, some of you guys suggested that we have post goals to encourage interaction. no one voted against it yet, so we'll keep it goin!
note goal: since we're back in main storyline, upping the goal! 1,000 notes is the goal, so when we hit that, 3tan14 will be dropped as soon as it's done! thank you all for reading and would love to hear any thoughts: what did you like about the chapter? how did a certain scene make you feel? what are you excited to see next? any shares, comments, tags, and reblogs with commentary count, and i appreciate anything you guys have to say.
note 1: thank you so so much for the support! y'all you donât know how much it means to me. also, pls donât hesitate to let me know what you liked about the chapter with a message. it would mean so much.Â
note 2: if your url is not highlighted, it means i couldnât tag you!
note 3: if you donât want to be tagged on anything specific or want to be removed from the permanent taglist, just message me and iâll remove you no prob!
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oh my gosh wait this is the bestđ„čđ Iâm glad youâre smiling, the last scene of pt 1 is truly special, even if itâs brief. this was basically yoongi doing what he was doing and oh god my heart is beating again!!
IM SO READY FOR ANGEL. READY TO BE ABSOLUTELY WRECKED IN ALL DIRECTIONS. CANNOT WAIT (need to finish some work and then Iâll be home, gonna sit down and inDULGE)
Please.
Thank you so much for your hard work. You are a gift to the army and fanfic community and I want to give my gratitude in advanced
AHHH hell yeah babe get work done and then relax to read with no distractions! Thatâs probably the best way to read this one just because thereâs so much. Although I did see some people needing to take breathers HAHA so thereâs a chance you need to do that, toođ
Wait, youâre way too kindđ« Iâm just enjoying making things and sharing them with you guys! Itâs the community that is my absolute favorite part of everything, so thank you for being heređ«
explicit warnings: cursing, thigh riding, cowgirl, oral (m rec), naughty studio time(??), couch sex, rough sex, giving yoongi the business, bold as fuck reader, choking, spanking, penetrative sex, kissing deserves to be here too lol, alexa play no hands by waka flocka, deep throating, hair/head tugging, nipple play, yoongi in that gd tank, yoongi in those gd glasses, teasing, titty fucking hello!!!!, stripping while he watchesâŠ. yeah, missionary, sub!3tanyoongi?????, scratching, multiple orgasms, protected sex, emotional sex, the glasses.. stay on??, good god theyâre so hot iâm blushing
â
â
Itâs morning when Jimin gets a call.Â
Shifting in sheets that arenât his, he sleepily blinks once before eyeing the blue light with a squint, wondering who dares wake him up before his natural rise. What time even is it anyway? Itâs gotta be an ungodly hour if his circadian rhythm is disturbed.Â
Still, he grabs his cell from the nightstand, flinching at the movement behind him and inwardly slinging out curses.Â
Because waking him up is one thing.Â
But if anyone disturbs Taehyung heâs gonna give them hellâ
Min Yoongi: Incoming Call
Shit.
Jimin yanks the covers off, rushing out of bed and snapping Tae awake anyway. For what? Donât fucking know, but theyâre ready. Wherever. Whatever. They already stayed up clutching their phones until they physically couldnât keep their eyes open.Â
Because as much as Yoongi assured him nothing would happen, Jimin still couldnât let go of his car keys.
Answering slow, he feels his chest winding and winding, eyes locked with Taehyung while they both wait on edge, ââŠYoongi?â
âYeah.â
Thank the fucking stars.Â
Yoongiâs okay. Heâs on the line. He made it to morning or whatever fucking time it is, and heâs doing exactly what he said he would.
And itâs enough, enough, enough.
Burns zing up the corners of Jiminâs eyes, and he swipes hard as Taehyung moves, likely to hear whatâs happening and even more likely to just be by his side.Â
Jimin is grateful for either one. But he tries to keep composure as he croaks, âYou better have woken me up for a reason.â
The slight hum on the line induces a wobbly smile. âYou slept?â
âFuck you,â Jimin shakily laughs, wiping liquid relief from an eye before Taehyungâs thumb brushes tenderly over the other. His gaze is thankful while continuing, âWe did but not much.â
âSorry.â
âItâs okay.â Sniffling, Jimin walks to Taeâs door, letting him into the hallway first and finally drinking in the sight of his ass in those sweats. Because he can finally function like a normal, smitten loser again. âWeâll come over so we canââ
âNo need.â
âWhat?â Nope. Back to panic mode. And judging from his boyfriendâs posture, Taehyung has backpedaled into that, too. âWhat do you mean no need?â
Thereâs a slight pause on the line, and small noises make their way through the speaker. It sounds like bedsheets, but it also sounds likeâŠÂ
âSheâs still sleeping.â
Oh.
Oh, shit.
A tidal wave of relief crashes into Jiminâs ducts as he hangs his head, palming his face caught in a heavy tide of emotion. When he turns, Taehyung fairs no better, his eyes red and fingers wiping at a perfect, perfect cheek. One of them sniffles, but Jimin canât tell if itâs him or not, because his vision is blurry and his heart is beating, beating, beating again.Â
Whether you know it or not, whatever you did last night may have just changed Yoongiâs entire life.
Because Jimin knows this man through and through. Years of picking up his habits and tells didnât amount to nothing. Itâs how he was able to sense exactly when to intervene, and how he knew exactly what that hauntingly hollow tone in Yoongiâs voice meant when he busted in that day.Â
The tone he hears now? The man that just spoke on the line?Â
That is a Min Yoongi so in love he canât even hide it over the phone.Â
Fuck.Â
Gathering himself, Jimin squeaks out, âI⊠Iâm glad youâŠâ What the fuck does he say? Every thought jams in his throat so hard he has to hand the phone off.
Thankfully, Taehyung perfectly continues his thoughts, voice scratching rocks under a waking river, âWeâre glad youâre both safe.â
âMm.â
âSo whenâs the wedding?â
Jimin huffs through a fresh batch of tears, clearing his face before grinning at Tae very seriously awaiting an answer. Honestly, at this point? Itâs not far-fetched. Jiminâs seeing your future clearer than his present, and maybe he will be a fun uncle sooner than he thinks.
If only Yoongi would just get the fucking talk with your brother over with.Â
But Jimin understands the hesitation. If he were in that same position, thereâs no telling when he would be courageous enough to stand up to the guy. Thereâs a reason heâs quick to command a room, and his lifelong mission to protect his younger sister made him grow up a lot faster than everyone else.Â
Still⊠Yoongi just deserves to be happy. And youâre the very obvious answer to helping with that.Â
As much as he may have wanted some chances of his own, Jimin is grateful you found your way into his best friendâs heart. Not just anyone is invited inside, and even less people can truly be allowed to stay.Â
And youâre probably the only one that has permanent residence.Â
âYou guys should get some sleep.â
Taehyung pouts right on cue, and Jimin canât fight those sleepy, droopy eyes. âYou didnât answer me.â
Cute as fuck! He must be stopped. Taking the phone, Jimin speaks into the line fully recovered, shooting his cheeky partner a teasing glare, âWe will if you get some, too.â
âCanât.â
âWhy not?â
âGot some things to do at the studioââ
âNo!â They reject together, both equally as appalled because what the fuck kinda answer is that?Â
âAfter what happened last night? Are you crazy?â
âWhat happened to spending time with her? Men!âÂ
âHeâs going on a business trip, I canât lose to him.â
âSo what?â Tae asks before they both share an even further confused look. Yoongi may be a lovesick fool but that doesnât give him an excuse to be a dumbass! âYouâre just gonna leave her alone?â
Thereâs a sigh on the line before Jimin plants a hand on his hip. âNot just that. You gotta rest, too, bro. If she doesnât tell you to take it easy or at least get checkedâwhich she willâweâre going over there to annoy you.âÂ
âYou serious?â
âYes, Iâm serious.â Jimin cocks his head and leans closer to the phone. âAt least rest easy for the next couple days. Especially if you have all this time to see each other.â
The timing couldnât be more perfect. Your brother is leaving for his trip and Yoongi caught some unfortunate hits to his ribs. The dude basically has a free pass to spend the whole week with you, and heâs not even taking full advantage of it? Oh, the things Jimin has to say about the thin line of work ethic and relationship effort.Â
âIâll think about it.â
âThink about it for a long time,â Taehyung cuts in before Jimin can pop off, walking away into the living room.Â
Itâs fine. Let him figure out that you arenât a woman he can just leave. Frankly? That would tickle Jimin to no end to see Yoongi folding his plans so fast just to be with you.Â
But he spares him the tirade only because youâre fast asleep right next to him. âThank you for calling, man.â
âSaid I would.â
âI know.âÂ
Because above all else, Jimin is happy to hear that voice. Even if itâs obvious heâs a little banged up from last night, itâs still Yoongi. In one piece. Thatâs all Jimin wanted, and he canât thank you enough,
âDonât overwork yourself, and stay with her as long as you can.â
Thereâs a small laugh on the other end. âI plan on it, Chim.â
And Jimin catches on to why. âIâm holding you to that then.âÂ
â
â
Dawn breaks through open blinds, stretching its orange tint across a clean, spotless table.Â
You donât know what got you up so early. But when you peer into the kitchen, you tell yourself you woke up right on time.Â
Because seeing Yoongi when youâre wide awake is better than any dream youâll ever have.
Not because of his appearance, even though the sight of him sends a pang through your chest. No. Itâs the way heâs quietly prepping a morning meal, using the arm on his better side thatâs not sporting a nasty hit to the ribs, without you even asking.Â
Bits of sunlight dance right out of your eyes.
The effort. The consideration. This man shouldnât be lifting a finger, yet here he is cooking before you even left his bed. Isnât this the same man that got caught up in a fight hours ago? Isnât this the same man you almost walked out on with a frozen heart?Â
Yes. But heâs also the same man that loves you. And you still canât grasp that concept in any of the fingers playing with his tee you borrowed.
âHi,â you whisper, telling him a thousand things.Â
To which he regards before smiling soft, voice travelling over linoleum and circling around your heart, âMorning, doll.â
Damn. You hear it. Yoongiâs sore as hell.Â
But instead of getting into that right away, you silently take residence by his side. Because this moment feels too delicate, and you admire his willingness to take care of you unprompted. You didnât even know youâd eat before going back home.Â
With a hand warming his back, you wait until Yoongiâs done tossing food on the stove to peck his morning-chilled cheek. âThank you for cooking,â you murmur, admiring those beautiful brown eyes. âSleep okay?â
âCus of you,â your lover softly responds, eyeing your lips before gliding back up to your gaze. âYou?â
Ugh. Heâs gotta know those glasses are so unfair. Theyâve gotten you repeatedly before, and theyâre certainly getting you now.Â
But you canât help but deflate at the cuts behind those rims, while knowing there are even more bruises hiding underneath his oversized tee. How is Yoongi cooking right now? How is he even awake? âSame.âÂ
âGood.âÂ
These instant, deep shivers at his deeper morning voice will never, ever go away. But anything you wanna do about them isnât important right now. Right now, you need to make sure Yoongi is either okay, or finds a way to get better.Â
Sliding your hands down the slopes of his chest, you delicately rest one on his ribs. âDoes it still hurt?âÂ
Yikes. That wince is enough. But Yoongi doesnât shy away from your touch, and you appreciate the way he stays honest. âItâs sore. But I should be good.â
âYou gonna get it checked?â
Thereâs a slight upward tilt of his lips. âNot right now.â At least the honesty persists, as much as you donât want him following the typical manly response to hospital visits. âBut I will if you want me to.â
âPlease go,â you gently urge, lest you disturb the soft morning dew before it melts with the sunrise. âFor me?â
Only sizzles from the stove fill the space until Yoongi nods, and his voice is just as low and tender, âIâll go after work.â
Oh. âYouâre working today?â
Just like breakfast, you didnât expect this, either. Frankly, you figured neither of you were gonna even think about work, much less go. Sure, heâs due a hospital visit and you owe some friends immediate explanations for your absence. But other than that, shouldnât Yoongi be resting?Â
Does his craft truly mean that much?Â
Well, shit. You gotta respect his work ethic, thatâs for damn sure. Because you would sequester yourself to your bedroom and have endless dates with your television if you were sporting a good jab or two. This music thing must mean more to Yoongi than you previously thought. And who are you to step on that dream?Â
Suddenly, all thoughts and concerns flee from the kiss on your cheek.Â
âIâll stay if you stay,â he says, turning to move the pan and scrunching his face with a grunt. Fuck.Â
âIâŠâ Shit, you were gonna go back to the house anyway. And from Yoongiâs smartass smirk, you can tell he already knew that. âJust need to check on him, too. And he doesnât have a car right now, so. I should at least give him a ride.âÂ
âFigured.â In a move so domestic your head spins, Yoongi turns your body and gently pats your butt. âNow go sit. Letâs eat and figure this out.âÂ
â
â
As you devour a flawless meal and clean your dishes, you plan out the day. Youâll head home and check on your brother while Yoongi heads to the studio, and then youâll rendezvous with your friends to hang out until heâs done with work. Theyâre already lighting up your phone like no oneâs businessâespecially Yuri.Â
Yoongi flicks the sink off before you both head to his bedroom, and you melt at the way he slowly wraps his arms around your front halfway there, all four of your legs slowing to close the rest of the distance.Â
Whatâs he doing? This is joyfully new, but you have a pretty tight deadline. Warming his forearm and your own cheeks, you chuckle out, âWe have to hustle, old man.âÂ
âYou hustle me all the time,â he accuses into your shoulder blade, kissing its ridge and making you reconsider walking out the door entirely. âLemme have this.âÂ
Your second laugh is more subdued, and youâre right between his bed and desk when you lift both hands to hold him close. âYou have everything I got,â you wisp into his skin, planting your lips once, twice before you feel his arms press further in. âSo this is nothing.âÂ
Seconds and silence slide by, the delicate veil of early morning still hovering around the room. When Yoongi doesnât say anything, you make to turn and face him.Â
But youâre stopped before your heart skips.Â
âI could stay like this all day,â he admits, voice so low it rumbles through your bones. âAnd itâd be perfect.âÂ
âWhat, you donât wanna see my face?â You joke with a giggle. âRude, but thatâs fine.âÂ
Yoongi only buries his nose further, his glasses sliding against your skin peeking from his shirt. âIâm much braver right here, doll.âÂ
Oh.Â
The leap your heart does is more of a dive, plummeting into the seafoam swirling around your feet. All the words you want to respond with jump off right after, leaving you with nothing but the clouds in your eyes.Â
You donât quite know what he means by that. But it feels like those six words hold the weight of a thousand, so you simply let another kiss on his smooth forearm linger. âDo you want me to go with you?âÂ
A puff of laughter warms you right through and, despite his earlier admission, Yoongi does slowly spin you around.Â
And when you follow, you realize youâre much braver when you arenât facing him, too.Â
âItâs not that, babe,â he says through a dashing curve. âBut the offer was cute.âÂ
âI take it back then.âÂ
âDamn!âÂ
Both of your laughs whoosh out and collide, sweeping as Yoongi pinches your side and you flinch towards the bed. âYou fuckerâ!â
Before you know it, your back hits a comforter before a weight presses your stomach, emotions clashing as youâre elated and shy and immediately concerned for your boyfriendâs side. âBaby, be carefulââ
Lips capture yours, sucking up your warning before a hand slides under your head. Sighing, you arch into his chest, feeling the weight of his chains slip across your breasts.Â
Euphoria isnât an adequate enough word to describe how you feel. Where there used to be flutters in your ribcage now reside strong, powerful wing beats, gusts of want and desire lifting you off the ground and launching you into clear skies. Starlight of every color exists within each kiss you share, and your fingers feebly grab his tee to keep you from falling back down to earth.Â
âIf we donât go now,â Yoongi rasps before sliding his mouth against yours, âWeâre never going anywhere again.âÂ
âI know,â you whisper, willingly letting him kiss you once more, âIs that a promise?âÂ
âFuck, I wish.âÂ
You do, too. But you know youâre running out of time for what you need to do. And werenât you just saying you had to respect his aspirations? Shit, you really do need to snap out of it. âCome on,â you order with a pat to his chest. âWe have all week to do this. We got time.âÂ
Turns out, youâre still amongst the heavens. The way Yoongiâs looking at you? This is the closest youâll ever get to being held by an angel.Â
Did he get more handsome overnight? Or is it the light in his eyes sustained since his confession in the kitchen? You donât quite know, and you may never pinpoint why, but the tug he has on your heart spans space and time.Â
And youâll run through both forever to keep meeting him again and again.Â
Burns prick your eyes, but he mercifully stands before he can catch any evidence of your yearning.Â
Just like that, the two of you bounce back to getting ready, with him sliding notebooks and headphones in a backpack while you change into your own clothes. As you sling your bag over a shoulder, he reaches for the closest hoodie, and you wordlessly make your way to the front door.Â
You really do hope he gets looked at today. But just like the calm after a storm, you want to encourage him gently rather than shove him out. At least he seems receptive to your gentle suggestions.
But after you ask one more time and he simply nods, you lower your eyes to his kicks. âSorry if Iâm nagging. Iâd just worry less if you went right away, thatâs all.â
âYou arenât nagging, babe.â Your freshly bloomed lover reaches out to hold your wrist, smoothing a rough thumb over your skin. Fucking hell, you canât help but frown at the gashes and cuts marring his knuckles. âIâll go as soon as I can.â
Not just his hands, but his face. His ribs. And maybe other places you havenât even seen yet.Â
You donât wanna leave his side.Â
But you have to head out before your brother leaves. Things need to get patched up before he flies out into more stress, and you owe him an apology for walking out when he was still aching. Based on Yoongiâs physical state? Your brother could be hiding some big wounds and you didnât even wanna talk to him.Â
However. Was last night necessary? Absolutely. You cannot entertain the possible outcomes had you not tried hard enough to get through Yoongiâs door. His eyes were so dulled, his hands felt so cold. What would have happened if you didnât force yourself inside?Â
Why was that guitar smashed to pieces?Â
This is also why you refuse to leave. So many questions, so many things you still donât know. Like what all happened when you were separated? And how in the hell is this man in love with you?
âI donât wanna go,â you confess, instantly encased in his arms and warmth. âIâd much rather keep kissing you.âÂ
âTrue,â he says with a resigned huff, shifting his glasses with an adorable nose scrunch. If only he didnât have so many little red lines of conflict on his face. âBut we both have stuff to take care of, so letâs get all that done first.â
âUgh, fine.â Your groan is more teasing than serious, and Yoongiâs laugh is nothing but understanding.Â
Damn. You still feel it. You really donât wanna go. Be it the rawness of last night still on your skin, or the confessions still on your tongues, you just wanna stay by his side. âSorry,â you breathe out, lacing your fingers to pepper love along his strong, reddened ridges. âIâm serious. I donât wanna leave you right now.â
Walking out of Yoongiâs door just doesnât feel right. Even if heâs right there and will be following you out. Is this feeling normal? Are you supposed to feel this tightly woven to someone? Because the stitching between your hearts has only gotten stronger in the tempest of last night, as if you bonded together just to hold on for dear life.Â
Maybe thatâs exactly what happened. And itâs exactly why you can barely take one step out of his place.Â
âThen donât.â
Not one second passes before your chin is held, and lips slide so tenderly across yours that they may as well melt into your touch. Your reaction is quickly swooped into his mouth, and everything falls away as you let him seize your every thought. Lightning from last night zips out of your limbs, your toes, your fingers clasping his loose tee.Â
You might just cry where you stand.
How have his kisses gotten even better? How have you never felt this way even though youâve done this far more times than you were ever supposed to? It should be impossible, and yet, this man finds even more ways to astound you.Â
Yoongi slips a hand over your cheek, giving one more beautiful push of his lips as he confesses, âI donât wanna leave you, either.âÂ
And your breath stutters onto his features. âYou, too?â
Slow, he kisses your cheek, the clear rim of his specs skimming your nose. When he draws back, you look right into his eyes, wondering why heâs watching your mouth instead.Â
âMe, too.â Yoongi kisses your other side with a quiet peck. âFuck, me, too.âÂ
You fucking hate what you have to do, but you donât have a choice.Â
With one last lingering kiss, you both gather enough courage to set out and do what you must.Â
â
â
Your house is already a flurry of activity as you enter to see your brother in the kitchen, packing his leather duffle thatâs a constant companion on his trips.Â
Of course. The memory of him purchasing the lavish accessory pops into your head every time you watch him scurry around, dimples ever present on his proud cheeks. Itâs almost enough to make you smile yet again.Â
But you canât when the same face is currently scratched to hell. Just like Yoongiâs, if not worse.Â
Fuck, is he really gonna travel looking like that?Â
âHey,â he rasps out, still fighting off slumber. âYouâre back earlier than I thought.âÂ
âWanted to check on you before we left.â Fuck, your voice sounds like itâs being forced through a clogged pipe. Loosen the hell up! âAnd dude. Put some bandaids on, yeah?âÂ
âYeah, just give me a sec. Making sure I have everything before my ride gets here.âÂ
âHuh?â He got a ride? Youâre here now so you can take him to the airport. âYou sure you donât need me to drive you?âÂ
âYeah, itâs all good. I didnât know you were coming back.âÂ
Shit. His body seems just as angular as it did last night. Which, quite frankly, could still be from what went down in the lot.Â
Because even though you see both men banged up, you suddenly realize you donât actually know what all transpired.Â
After all, there wasnât much talk of it after you walked into the tempest of Yoongiâs living room.
Of course, you arenât gonna bring it up just this second. There are other things to ask about and make sure of first. âWallet? Phone? Passport?âÂ
âYup, yup, uhh.. Yup.âÂ
Zippers sling in the quiet morning air as you continue, âAnd youâre coming back on Friday, right?â
âOh.. Nah.â When you start crossing the kitchen, your brother hauls his leather bag over his better shoulder. Honestly, no one would be able to tell the other oneâs bruised with his suit on. That thing damn well covers everything except the cuts on his face and hands. âSaturday.âÂ
You pause in your journey to the medicine cabinet. âWait.. Saturday? The release partyâs on Friday.â
âYeah.. I know.â
What the fuck? Thatâs bullshit theyâre keeping him longer than they have to. Struggling to understand how corporate can keep your brother on a leash and get away with it, you urge, âTell them to at least let you go home a day early. Donât you wanna support your friends?â
âYou mean Yoongi?â
A zing of terror zips through your eyes, freezing every vein in an instant.Â
The fuck was that question? Never mind. Stay calm stay calm stay fucking calm. âUhh, yeah, heâs one of them? But the other guys, too, right? I know you care about them and this is huge.â
Mercifully, your sibling just shakes his head and waves you off. âDonât you think I already tried? I donât wanna miss it but I donât have a choice. Conference schedule is pretty tight and Iâm heading the panel on Friday.â
âIs it in the morning? You can fly out afterââ
âWhy are you fighting so hard?â
âWhy arenât you fighting harder!â
Okay, what in the hell is happening right now? Screw optics and how this must look for you, your brother needs to be there. Him and Yoongi are the tightest of friends, the most ride or die duo youâve ever seen. You canât picture a timeline where he misses this monumental moment, and itâs starting to really upset you that heâs barely trying.Â
âAlright, you know what?â Hard steps surge forward as you stand rigid, a duffle hastily dumped onto tile. âYou donât know what Iâve tried. You donât even know if I even told him yet.â
Fucking shit. You hold his stare before turning away, tossing out the idea of bandages entirely and searing footsteps into the hallwayâ
âOr do you.â
Before icing over with the unforgiving frost of zero gravity space.Â
Slow, you turn, not quite facing him but not backing down, either. ââŠExcuse me?â
âYou heard me. You talkinâ? What else has he been doing to you?â
Oh. Fuck that.Â
Doing to you?Â
Fuck all of this. This is too much to handle right now and you know youâre gonna snap if he keeps pushing because you are not having this conversation right before he leaves. Youâve already thought about this before, right? You cannot fuck with his head right before business trips because he needs to be on and locked in.Â
But now heâs fucking with your temper and those are some choice fucking words pulled out of his ass.Â
You donât think youâve ever legitimately threatened this man to his face and meant it before, and it tears a sharp corner of your heart, âYou better be very careful. With whatever you wanna say next.â
The air proves too thick to slice. While your body stands aflame, your brother is iced over, brimming with an energy that damn near takes physical form. âAll Iâm saying is? I find out some fucking bullshit is going onââ
No no no, not now.
Reacting fast is your only instinct, brain haywire and fizzling fizzling boiling. Harsh, you spin on your heel and shout the first thing you can think of, âOh, come onââ
âYou better hope to god youâre ready for whatâs comingââ
âStop!â Fuck fuck fuck, this is so frustrating because your head is exploding and your body is screaming to just tell him already. Fuck the consequences at this point this is ludicrous.Â
Doing to you? Yoongi? How dare he speak about his best friend like that how dare he accuse him without outright saying the words all you have to do is tell your brother how wrong heâs got it.Â
But you canât be the one. Yoongi said he would, and he probably took months to get to that point of strengthâand healing, from what you can tell.Â
This is between them. Them. You have to honor that, as much as you wanna just confess everything now and deal with it yourself.Â
But goddamn your brother is pulsing with anger and itâs leaking into your own charged air.Â
What does he think is happening? Does he think Yoongiâs just, what, playing you? Heâs wrong. Heâs so wrong. Yoongiâs been nothing but the best thing thatâs ever happened to you and shit your heart hurts becauseâŠ
Your brother is valid in thinking that.Â
How foolish. Didnât you guard your heart from Yoongi for the longest? Didnât everything start because you figured you knew who he was because of his reputation? You got him all wrong, too. So how can you be mad at your brother for doing the same?Â
Fuck, think. Just think before someone gets hurt.Â
Because if you arenât careful, someoneâor multiple someonesâwill get hurt in seconds. You have to bear the pain alone right now. To protect them both, you have to keep your trembling mouth shut.Â
And? You have to admit that something isnât fair here. Not to you, not to Yoongi, but to him. Last night was rough as fuck but, while you both got to have raw, beautiful closure, the one standing in front of you had to go to sleep in an empty house.Â
So chill the fuck out.Â
Breathing to cool down, you tense and loosen, tense and loosen. âI get it. Youâre angry, and you have a lot going on. But,â you bite down on your lip to keep going. âWeâre talking about something else. Weâre talking about you, and Iâm still pissed you even let those guys goad you into a fight. What are we, twelve?â
Seething, your sibling takes the switch of pace. But it is not what you want to hear. âAre you seriâ? What the hell was I supposed to do? That son of a bitch grabbed youââ
âI know,â you recoil. âDonât tell me like you were there, because you werenât.â
Finallyâfinallyâthose angry lines in his face vanish.Â
But they make way for something much worse than anger. Because your older brother, someone thatâs been there for you your whole life..Â
Looks absolutely stricken over the one time he wasnât.Â
Damn it.Â
Regretful, you drop your shoulders in exhaustion and quiet compromise. When you continue, your voice is much softer, âBut I told you: they were. Your friends, they were there because they knew you wanted that. Jimin got me away, Yoongi took me home and stayed.âÂ
You really have got to stop saying his name like you love him. It could start becoming too obvious.Â
Shuddering, you shift your weight, folding your arms and shrinking into yourself.Â
That night, despite Yoongiâs best and most gentle efforts, still clings to where that loser touched you at Dalo. You hate that you havenât gotten over it, and you loathe the way you still rub over the same spot. Over, and over. âWhat did you want him to do? Leave me here?â
âNo.âÂ
âExactly. And he didnât.â You adjust your stance again, making an impromptu gamble as you decide to let some truth leak out. Because your brother is owed at least this much. âAnd fine, you wanna know something? We do talk more because of it.â
Your brotherâs head snaps up, and you brace. Because if you show any shred of weakness or hesitation, heâll see right through your weak attempt to hide most of the truth,Â
âBut donât ever accuse him of doing anything to me. That was fucked up to say and you know it.â
âFuck.â In agreement, he rubs his hair back. âIt was. Iâm sorry.âÂ
âTrust me,â you swallow, hating that this is how things have to be for now. âYou have nothing to worry about. Heâs never.. Never done anything to me, anyway.âÂ
Itâs not a lie. Everything heâs done has been with you. For you. Because of you.Â
But your heartâs in anguish as it sinks. Because that expression on your older siblingâs face can only be one thing. Â
Pure. Utter. Relief.
Fire singes your eyes before you can quell the flame. Itâs the hardest technical truth to swallow.Â
Sure, he doesnât have anything to worry about as far as you being safe. And on top of that, he doesnât have to worry about any fake shit because Yoongi confessed to you last night.
But as far as his best friend sleeping with and now dating his sister behind his back? That is still very much sitting right in the center of the table.Â
And now youâre starting to see just how fucked all three of you are as soon as you sit down to eat the truth.Â
But Yoongi said heâd be the one to tell, so he will.Â
This feeling is so fucking miserable, though.Â
In the end, your brother is effectively convinced, raking a hand across his head and sighing. âJimin told me what all went down at Dalo, I just⊠Last night was⊠Fucked up.âÂ
âWell, yeah.â
âNo. See, this is just like what you said to me. You canât say it like you were there.â
Itâs your stomachâs turn to twist. âSo? You were scratched and bruised to hell, and YâŠâ Shut up, shut up. Youâre not supposed to know about the state of anyone else. âAnd you were⊠quieter.â
âBecause of what happened, dude.â
You blink. âWhat⊠What happened?â
Your brother looks at youâreally looks at you.Â
And suddenly, your gut flares in terror, storming in an instant across your abdomen.Â
âThat bitch pulled something on us.â
Your heart.Â
Itâs in freefall.
âWait⊠What?â You canât even form more than one syllable at a time, your legs turning gelatinous and knees starting to give out. âNo⊠What are youâŠ?â
What the fuck did he just say? That bitch pulled a what?Â
Your sibling slowly walks toward you once again, watching like heâs just waiting for you to say anything. Do anything.Â
But youâre a complete statue because all you can think about is the horror of something happening and the relief that nothing happened all at once.Â
Was Yoongi too scared to mention that part? Is this why he was holding back and shaking every time he reached out to touch you? Even this morning, he was soâŠÂ
Youâve never seen him like that. Is this why?Â
Your mind is swirling and crashing, overlapping each passing thought and scream running through your head. âIâm so sorry,â you hitch out, âI didnât know. Why didnât you say anything?â
âDidnât wanna scare you,â he sighs out. Putting both hands on his hips, your brother stops feet away, visibly still shook as he pierces wooden planks with his stare. âBut he pulled it right before Yoongi⊠and if it werenâtâŠFuck.âÂ
Burns flare and slice through your eyes when he has to pause. What is he trying to say? Pulled what?Â
Before Yoongi what?Â
Your brother continues, and your throat tightens. âIf it werenât for some random ass sirens, I⊠Things couldâve been so different.âÂ
What the fuck is happening. What the hell are you hearing?Â
âIt was probably dumb as fuck. But I was so fucking angry,â he grits out, watery eyes crushed looking your way. âSo fucking mad at how he was talking about you, I.. Walked right up to him and told him to fuck off.â
You canât even breathe.Â
âI still feel it,â he quietly adds, fingers pressed against his side. âRight here.âÂ
âFuck,â you finally choke out, eyes on fucking fire.Â
âBut all I knew was to keep you all safe,â he says, with hardened resolve and a wobbly chin. âAnd thatâs exactly what I did. I did that shit, even if that meantââÂ
Tears fling out of your eyes, flowing hot down your cheeks because you wouldnât want any of them to go out that way. Nothing happened nothing happened nothing happened and yet your body is acting as if something did and it hurts.Â
Your brother is there as soon as you crumple forward, letting you bury your head in his chest and sob your heart out. For him, for his friends, and for all the time you had with the man you love so, so dearly.Â
If anything happened to your brother before you came clean⊠If anything happened before you and Yoongi could evenâŠÂ
Suddenly, you feel equal weights of guilt. For running out on your brother. And for almost walking out on Yoongi.Â
You decide an apology is in order for both of them, and all the understanding in the world for Yoongiâs frosted demeanor as soon as you get him alone again.
And you are one hundred percent going to tell your brother everything once heâs back.Â
The tears cannot stop, and youâre sure you are crying unimpeded in a pressed and primmed suit. âIâm so sorry,â you keep repenting like a prayer. âThis is all my fault.â
âNoââ
âYou almostââ
âHey, stop.â He yanks you back, both of your faces soaked with saltwater. âWhat did I say before? I threw the first swing. You didnât do anything wrong.â
âBut it led to all this, I just.. I just feel so fucking stupid.â
âDonât. Hey, look at me.â Firm but gentle, he holds you at armâs length, forcing you to face him. âMaybe weâre both stupid, but you werenât the idiot. I was.âÂ
You feel so many conflicting things in your soul.Â
What would you have done if Yoongi was in critical condition? What would you have done differently if your brother was instead? Are they the same? Are the two situations really so different anymore?Â
No they arenât they arenât they arenât.Â
âPlease donât do that again,â you shake out. âEven if it was for me, if I ever lost you, I...âÂ
âYou know I canât promise anything.â He furrows his brows when you eye him with anger and sadness. âBut nothing like that is happening again. Especially with the same dudes.âÂ
âOkay.âÂ
A vicious tornado of emotions sends your whole body into agonizing pain. This isnât what you expected at all, and itâs causing your limbs to lock at the bends. Too many scenarios are jangling about yet you canât ask for specifics because that will just make it even more real.Â
A nightmare is somehow better once you know it ends with you waking up. âIâm⊠gonna need some time to process everything.â
âI know. And I wasnât planning on saying anything, but⊠You deserve to know the things I get into.âÂ
Ah.Â
The irony is not lost on you.Â
âAt least, if they involve you. We learned our lesson. You were right to tell us off.â
God. You feel numb.Â
âThanks,â you murmur, suddenly immensely tired. âI think I need more sleep.â
A blaring honk sounds outside the house, and you both flinch at the noise.Â
And your throat burns at the way your brother instinctively swept you behind his back.Â
When you realize what it is, you know what has to come next.Â
And heâs the first to react as he turns to face you again, âAlright. Iâm heading out, just remember to go get my baby when sheâs fixed, yeah?â
âDo you have to go?â
Wait.
The question seems to startle him as much as it does you.Â
How did you blurt it right out before even registering the words? Why does your heart clench at the sight of those eyes looking so pained?Â
Why does everything feel so shaky within these walls that were always your home?
âI do,â he says, voice tight. âIâm sorry.âÂ
And why the fuck do you feel sad heâs leaving?
âNo, no, itâs.. Of course you have to.â You canât help the lump in your throat from bobbing, the regret in your limbs as they barely move at your side. âI dunno why I asked, I guess I just..âÂ
Thereâs no response to your sniffle.Â
âSorry for yelling,â you squeak out. âI just feel really queasy.â
For a lot more reasons than one.
âWe all made it out,â your brother whispers. âThatâs what matters.â
âWill you⊠Will you at least try to be back for the party?â
The man swallows with his brows knit tight, then attempts to crack the tiniest smile. âYou know I will. Thatâs my guy.âÂ
âOkay.â You nod, sniffling again. After what he just told you? You know heâll do anything for the ones he loves. âSee you there.â
Your brother rubs a comforting palm over your head before turning, heading for the door and grabbing his leather duffle.Â
When he stops to glance at you one more time, you give a little wave of your hand before watching the door click shut.Â
Chest caving as you collapse to the ground in tears.Â
â
â
The need to call Yoongi burns so harshly your fingers damn near set your top aflame.
But heâs at work, and you canât fuck things up right when youâre approaching the finish line. You almost did with your brother, and that gave you twelve heart attacks in the span of minutes.Â
Still. Your chest aches so much that a thirteenth could very well be approaching. You donât even realize youâre bracing the hallway wall for support until you try to stand, back sore and aching from bending so far for so long.Â
What did your brother mean to say about Yoongi? What did that coward pull on them? Do you even want to know what happened?Â
Fighting back tears, you reach down for your phone, shakily typing out a message only to erase it. Then again. And again.Â
And again.Â
Giving up, you forcefully swallow all your worries, cringing at the bitterness of the unknown and the burnt molasses of hidden truths.Â
Itâs going to be okay. No matter what you think or imagine in your head, they made it out, they made it out, they are all alive.Â
Thatâs the only reason you can move forward, each step getting you from your room. To your bathroom.Â
And back again.Â
â
â
After showering, you feel lighter and refreshed, though the soreness between your legs has yet to leave.Â
But you wouldnât want it any other way, as itâs another reminder of Yoongiâs apparent brush with survival. His broken living room spurned the creation of your bond, your devotion to him as he confessed before you gave him your utmost trust in his sheets.Â
The end is so close. As soon as this week is over, youâll rip the last bit of peel from your pair of tangerines, baring all truths to your brother and facing the consequences.Â
Finally ready, you head to your car, opening your text threads with a plan: start slow.Â
Start with something that can be interpreted neutrally if anyone saw it on his phone screen, especially if your headstrong ex is in the room.Â
You [12:31pm]: how are you feeling?
Yoongi [12:34pm]: 1 AttachmentÂ
You close your door with brows furrowed.Â
Yoongiâs at the hospital?Â
Thatâs not what you expected at all.Â
Your chest swells with relief knowing heâs there, but you also wanna make sure heâs feeling okay. Especially his mental state after whatever the fuck your brother just dropped on you before leaving.Â
Goddamn, thatâs going to gnaw at your brain until you find the right time and right amount of courage to ask about it. Because itâs very possible Yoongi wonât tell you.Â
Because itâs probably something he knows you wonât like.Â
Fuck.Â
You [12:34pm]: Loved an Attachment
You [12:34pm]: thank you for listeningđ€ still sore?
Yoongi [12:35pm]: Yeah, but not bad. Just there.
Wait. Heâs not at the studio. That means you canâ
Yoongi: Outgoing Call
âHey.â
âHey,â you slowly say as you pull out into the street. âIâm driving now so this is easier.â
âCourse. You going to Taeâs?â
âMaybe. Iâm going to Yuriâs first.â You swallow, realizing that you didnât tell him about what you let slip before driving over. âI.. Told her. About you.â
Thereâs a little bit of silence on the line, just some adjustments and muffled speaker sounds. âSorry, just writing this down. Whatâs wrong with that?â
You huff through your nose. Gotta be those patient forms that always take forever to fill out. âOh. Just more and more people knowing, is all.âÂ
âEveryoneâs gonna know eventually.âÂ
You hold back a small smile. Because heâs right. âYeah. Iâm just tired of this feeling.â
âLike youâre hiding something.â
Itâs your turn for silence. He doesnât know how accurately that was played out today. The only answer you can provide is a curt, âExactly.â
âSame.â
Wings beat around your heart again.Â
He wants this. Yoongi really, really wants this. And years ago, that outcome wouldnât have even crossed your mind as an option.Â
âThank you for going, baby.â
âThe guys made me.â
You hum. âWhich ones.â
After a pause, you hear a puff of amusement. âAll of them at some point today, actually.âÂ
All of them? Does that include your brother? Did they talk about the trip already?
Your laugh is bittersweet. âWell. Glad to know you can be forced by everyone else except me.â
âHey, I was already gonna go because of you!â Yoongi quietly retorts, and you giggle at the pout in his words. âJust wanted to get a headstart on work first.â
You were right. He really does wanna go all out for his musical endeavors.Â
Itâs extremely admirable, and wildly attractive, but it does come to a point. âAs much as I love your passion, old man, I wanna keep you upright.â
He laughs soft into the line, and you think you can listen to that specific sound on an infinite loop. âThatâs fair.âÂ
âHow long is it gonna take, you think?â
âDunno. But Iâll keep myself busy until Iâm out.â
Of course he will. You donât doubt he wonât waste any time. Didnât he bring journals in his backpack? You wouldnât be surprised if he wrote ten thousand songs before being called in. âJust call me if you need anything, please?â
âOf course, babe.â
âThank you,â you say with utmost sincerity. âIf only my brother would be less stubborn and get checked, too.â
âHeâll probably do it once he gets there.â
âDid you convince him?â
âNah. But once he knows I did, heâll do it.â
âFigures.â You scoff. âOkay, Iâm almost there. Let me know how it goes.â
âK. Bye, doll.â
You didnât ask him what went down. But itâs not the time nor place, and you have plenty of chances this week to figure out when that would beâif at all.Â
âTalk soon.âÂ
â
â
For a normally bustling household, Yuriâs house is quiet.Â
So itâs not shocking when you walk into the kitchen and see all your friends glance your way, slowly vacating their chairs with eyes never leaving your face. Even Reia is on high alert.Â
Did Yuri tell her? Did Yuri tell anyone else?Â
No. Sheâs a talker and loves spilling, but she promised. And when she promises something, you know you can trust her to keep it.Â
Itâs what pours emotion in your voice as you meekly greet, âHey, guysââ
A crushing hug closes your throat. Yuriâs the one that gets to you first, with Reia and Dominique waiting their turns to offer you healing, relieved embraces.Â
âWhat happened?âÂ
âScared us half to death.â
Dom puts you at armâs length to give a once over, noting your face rubbed raw and eyes still a little bloodshot. Thankfully, her pupils hold more concern than disappointment. âYou good?â
Your eyes wobble alongside your smile, and you think itâs enough proof. âMore than that,â you still decide to whisper, and your heart beats again at her reaction.Â
âThank god. I was ready to kick your ass if you werenât.â
Heading up to Yuriâs room, you all wait until the door is swung back before mounting her canopy bed, sitting in a tight circle as you divulge everything.Â
Well. Almost everything.Â
You tell them that Yoongi is the one youâve been seeing, how you went to check on him last night in a panic, and the terrifying reason why. When you mention the fight after the basketball game, all three of your friends erupt in questions, and you have to assure them everything turned out okay. Honestly, you also do this to assure yourself, too.Â
âSo⊠Your brotherâs just fine with all of this?â Reia asks, not noticing the tick of Domâs jaw.Â
âWell,â you start with a higher pitch, earning a pair of groans. âHe doesnât exactly know yetââ
âYup. Heâs gonna murder him.â
âYeah, should we say our condolences now or..â
âHow long has this been going on?â Reia fires off another question that digs into your chest. âWas he the one you were seeing the whole time?â
âYes,â you admit with a sigh. âI shouldâve told you guys from the beginning, but. The whole thing just felt so delicate. But! We just started making things official recently, so..âÂ
Dom turns your way. âOfficial how?â
Well. Here goes everything.Â
With a shaky breath, and lingering feelings from the time it happened, you reveal with watery eyes, âYoongi⊠Told me he loves me.â
Both Yuri and Reia react in yelps, Domâs gaze lowering as the girls reach to grab your hands.Â
Wait. Whatâs going on with her? Sheâs the one that knows the most, sheâs the one that covered for you all those months ago. She has to be the one that is the least surprised at all this.Â
Blinking, you note to confront her about it later. Right now, youâre too focused on trying not to cry as your friends tumble out questions and support,Â
âHe said it? Did you say it first or did he?âÂ
âHow did it happen! Oh, Iâm so happy for you, babeââÂ
âThankâthank you, Yuri,â you squeeze out as she hugs you close. âI couldnât believe it, but he just.. Said it. We werenât even doing anything, I was just.. Looking up what injuries he could have..âÂ
And he confessed in the most Yoongi fashion he could have.Â
Looking back, it shouldnât shock you at all. Heâs always found ways to sweep you off your proverbial feet, so why would a confession plucked from the heavens be any different?Â
She lets you go before wiping her eyes, Reia and even Dom now sporting watery pupils, too.Â
âAs much as Iâm upset at you for not telling us, Iâve never been so happy for you.â When Yuriâs features crease in another sob, you sniffle along with the rest. âItâs been so long since you⊠And you really.. Fuck.âÂ
You know what sheâs trying to say, and the realization has your throat constricting so tight.Â
Itâs been forever since youâve had something like this, someone like this. When you and Jungkook were together, you told him that you loved him before he broke it off.Â
Sure, you bought the rings together, but he never uttered those words until years after when it didnât even matter. And all your relationships after his were complete and utter bullshit, so you donât think you ever even heard those three words and knew them to be true.Â
Yoongi was the first to ever say them so sincerely.Â
And that fact makes your ducts burn and burn.Â
And when Yuri finally speaks, it breaks the dam holding your real deluge back,Â
âI canât think of anyone else that deserves to be loved more than you.âÂ
All at once, everything streams out as you hunch forward. The pain of everything youâve endured, the hopelessness of knowing youâd most likely end up alone, the excruciating prospect of a future that you never deemed bright, or peaceful, or comforting.Â
And to think that even this man couldâve been snatched away from you in a snap? Even more tears overlap with the ones youâre shedding, and you canât even reach out to hug all three beautiful, angelic souls surrounding you with tight arms and sobs because your limbs lock at all bends.Â
Itâs the exact release you need. All your friends supporting you, all the pent up anxiety of last night and today, the truth setting itself free in some capacityâall in the comfort of a plushie-laden bed you only doubted yourself in last time.Â
Everythingâs gonna be alright. It has to be. Youâre gonna fight for the ones you love, even if a war between them is inevitable.Â
It takes a few minutes of heavy silence for you all to separate, swiping and rubbing tears while letting out happy sniffles.Â
When you thank them for being understanding, they assure you itâs okay. And when you say youâre going to tell your brother soon, a force from the doorway has all of you leaping from lilac sheets,Â
âTell him what?âÂ
Jia stands firm with a laundry basket at her hip, and Yuri scoffs at her older sister for barging in. âA knock wouldâve been nice!âÂ
Fuck!Â
You canât tell Jia of all people. If you spill anything about Yoongi, sheâs one hundred percent going to tell your brother. Theyâre the same age, and run in pretty tight circles, so of course you are not going to risk it.Â
But you can tell her something else youâre going to tell your older sibling, so you fire out a half-truth,Â
âTell him not to pick any other fights that could get him killed.âÂ
Jiaâs eyes zoom to your wrecked face, and she drops the laundry with haste before asking, âWhat happened? When? Tell me now.âÂ
Huh. Maybe your brother has a type, if heâs still into Jia like he said before.Â
You feel a little spark in your chest as you let her know they all got in a scuffle after the basketball game, and another pang as she immediately abandons the room and clothes with a fierce declaration,Â
âIâm gonna kill them myself!âÂ
âDonât worry, I already hounded my brother!â You call out after her, sighing as Yuri shakes her head with a smile. âShe gets like that when sheâs really worried, huh.âÂ
âYeah..â Your friend leans to look around you, noticing the basket left alone on the ground. âAnd if sheâs super fired up, she drops everything and doesnât stop until itâs handled. Clearly.âÂ
Maybe both older siblings really are similar.Â
The firestorm of an interruption seemed to break the tension in the room, with all of you finally relaxing and catching up. When they ask you questions, you answer what you can.Â
And when you divulge information that has your ears burning, their squeals and yells give you whole new reasons to live.Â
â
â
After a very comforting lunch Yuriâs mom cooked, you head to the bathroom when your phone suddenly vibrates through your palm.
Huh? Thatâs weird. You expect the name on your screen to be Taehyung, not Yoongi.Â
Not that itâs a bad thing. Youâve been waiting to hear from him, so this is a pleasant surprise.Â
Closing the door to the guest bathroom, you gaze at the calming sage decor with a smile. âHi, how did itââ
âYouâre coming over later, right?â
Oh, shit. Is he okay?
âYes, baby,â you respond with a soothing lilt, ears perked and body on high alert.Â
Does he think you arenât anymore? You both decided on the plans earlier. Surely he knows youâd never just flake on him. âIâm coming back once youâre done with work, remember?â
Thereâs an uncomfortable pause on the line, which makes your boyfriendâs next question jab you so far in the lungs you canât breathe,
ââŠCan it be now?â
Shit.Â
Just like Jia earlier, you drop every plan you have to the wayside. Youâre sure that Taehyung will understand, and you already got through the biggest conversation you needed to with your friends.Â
âOf course,â you whoosh out. âLemme just say bye and Iâll go.âÂ
âTake your time.â A small shuffling interrupts. âItâll take me a bit to get back.âÂ
âOkay. See you there.âÂ
The strained urgency in his voice makes your hair stand on end, so you vacate the bathroom to inform the girls that you gotta goâbut not without a quick head tilt towards Dom, who follows you outside and into the afternoon sun. Â
â
â
You wait until youâre next to your car on the street, turning with a concerned expression and jittery nerves, âWhatâs up with you? Did I do something wrong?â
Turns out, you read Dominique correctly. Her jaw locks before loosening, and it reminds you of the time she confronted you about Yoongi before. God, how much has changed since then. That feels like ages and ages ago.Â
âItâs not about you,â your best friend clears the air and the tightness in your shoulders. âIâm just.. Glad he came around.â
âYoongi?â When Dom nods, you blink. âWait, what?â
âAt your house that night.. After he left your room, we hadâI dunno, a heart-to-heart.â She sighs, flicking braids over her shoulder. You note to compliment the beads she chose this time, because they remind you of summer and simpler times. âI mightâve pressured him a bit, and.. I think he wanted to tell me that he loved you. All the way back then.âÂ
Something in your heart stutters, and you can only repeat your last question, âWhat?â
âYeah. Something about needing to do something first,â she continues, holding your gaze with perfect brows furrowed in sunlight. âBut I could tell he was damn serious about whatever it was. And if he was willing to do it for you? I let it go.âÂ
Your mind whirls.Â
Yoongi was already in love with you back then? Is that why he needed to let you go? To deal with whatever he had to do?Â
One side of you breaks thinking he had to go through all that alone; the other side is screaming at his past self for not even giving you a choice. What did he go through? What did he have to do?
Now you really have to see him. Immediately.Â
âThank you, Dom,â you rush out while opening your door. âIâm just happy itâs over.â
âThe hell itâs not.â Shooting you a glare that heats the oncoming breeze, she reminds, âItâs not over until your brother knows. And based on everything thatâs happened? That conversation is not gonna go over well.âÂ
A dark, simmering boil starts in your stomach, and youâre already feeling queasy again. Tightening your door handle, you gulp hard. âI know.âÂ
âTrust me, Iâm happy for you both. I am.â Both hands find her hips as she levels a gaze that you really, really donât enjoy. âBut Iâm gonna be honest, I think this is gonna ruin their friendship for good.âÂ
Both of your lungs clamp shut.Â
âPlease donât say that,â you beg, âIâm gonna fight for all of us. I will.âÂ
âI donât doubt that, babe. Hey, uh uh, come here.â Reaching out, she gives you a tight hug just when you feel fragile again.Â
âListen to me. I donât doubt that,â she says into your shoulder. âIâm just here to be realistic. Just donât be shocked if thatâs how it goes. Weâll be here for you no matter what, too.âÂ
âOkay,â you say with a scrunched face into her scent. God, she always smells so good, and itâs almost enough to calm you down. Almost almost almost. âThank you. But Iâm not giving up.âÂ
âThatâs my girl.â She squeezes you one more time. âI love you.âÂ
With eyes searing over, you choke and grip her tighter. âI love you, too.âÂ
â
â
Yoongiâs door warms your back as you wait for him to show.Â
But thereâs a good chance it can just be your volcanic anxiety.Â
Ever since your arrival, youâve paced, youâve gnawed on your lips, youâve had to shake the nerves out of your hands.Â
And over and over, youâve strained your neck to look for your favorite cat, because you could sincerely use even a glimpse of her right now.Â
While she doesnât end up showing, Yoongi rounds the nearest corner minutes after your last desperate scan.Â
Fuck, heâs so handsome.Â
Even now, as he simply walks toward you with a backpack slung over his shoulder, you watch with undying yearning to feel those flowing bangs over his forehead. Youâd even settle for a single touch of his cheeks, one of them currently sporting a thin bandage.
But the closer Yoongi gets, the quicker your admiration morphs into concern. Thereâs a deep bend in his brows that you canât decipher, and his fist is balled pretty tight.Â
Seriously, what happened? He looks so troubled that you slowly push off the doorway to ask,Â
âBaby, whatâsââ
A bag hits the ground before youâre swooped into a kiss so electric your lips spark.Â
Him. Him, him, and more him. For the love of everything you donât understand whatâs happening but you kiss Yoongi back with everything you have, arms slinging around his strong shoulders and tugging him closer because he clearly needed this.Â
And fuck if you didnât need it just as much. Screw it if anyone sees you. This is all you want and youâll stay right here until he pulls away.Â
When he finally does, both of you swallow to catch your breaths, and your soul glimmers when his forehead meets yours.Â
âHi, baby,â you whisper to his exhales. âMissed you, too.â
Silent, your lover kisses your forehead before hugging you close, and youâre more sure of your prediction than ever. Something is bothering him.Â
He doesnât look worse, at least. But thereâs clearly something off and heâs not hiding it. His lack of words is loud enough.Â
âLetâs go inside,â you quietly suggest. âI wouldâve gone in already but I donât have a key.â
He nods, fishing out his keyring to let you both inside.Â
When you set your bags down and slip off your shoes, itâs only seconds before youâre softly pulled into a hug again, surprising yet so, so welcoming.Â
Even only after a few hours, youâve missed the fuck out of him. Which makes all of this an outright dream.Â
âSorry,â Yoongi finally murmurs against your shoulder. âI justâŠâ
âNothing to be sorry for.â You stroke a hand along his hair, massaging his scalp and loving how soft it feels. The windswept strands fall back into place as you keep running your fingers through. âDid you at least get your appointment?â
âYeah, I did.â He buries his face further. âNothing bad. Just canât lift anything heavy for a couple days.â
âGood. Thatâs easy to manage,â you whisper back into his tee, feeling the chill of lingering air conditioning and body warmth all at once. âIs something else bothering you?â
âNot exactly.â Whatever that means. âIâll tell you about it later. Just wanted this, and you.â
Oh. ThatâsâŠÂ
âIâm here now, love,â you assure with a melting heart, wondering what happened to cause this behavior.Â
Is it because of last night? Or something that happened today? Youâre anxious all over again, but from the way Yoongiâs acting, your worries are second to his. âHave you eaten yet?â
He shakes his head, only pulling you closer with not a word from his lips.Â
And from this point on, you make a silent vow to yourself. Whatever Yoongi needs, youâre going to take care of him.Â
No matter what, these next few days are all about himâa minuscule sacrifice in comparison to everything heâs done for you, whether you knew about it or not.
âIâll make you something then. Come on.âÂ
When you walk, you slip your hand down his arm to hold his hand, and your lead into his kitchen is short.Â
âAny requests?â You cheerfully ask as you spare a smile over your shoulder. âWe can do⊠Something lightâŠâ
Only to see him staring back with nothing but a lingering sense of longing.
Okay.Â
You need to get to the bottom of this now.Â
Stopping right over linoleum, you leave no room for arguments, âYoongi. Tell me whatâs wrong.â
He blinks before his gaze meets the floor. So youâre confused when he simply, quietly..Â
Laughs?Â
âItâs not that somethingâs wrong,â he slowly starts, a shy smile carving his features. âFor the first time in my life, nothingâs wrong.âÂ
Your heart beats extra loud.Â
âBut itâs too much to explain right now.â His eyes rise to meet yours. âJust know that Iâm so in love with you.âÂ
Oh.
âAnd I want you to know that every day I live.â
Fuck.
Your body responds before you can say anything, lips connecting to remove any need for speech. The knowledge of them all staring death in the face last night makes this confession sear your insides, and you canât help but kiss him like youâll never get to again.Â
Yanking him back, you spin on your heel until he flings into the kitchen, clutching your wrists before gripping your jaw with both hands.Â
His mouth heats on yours, his glasses the only barrier between your skin. Everything sizzles from your head to your toes, and you both bang into a countertop beforeâ
âFuck, ouch.â
âShit, you okay?â
Yoongi rubs his side with one eye pinched shut, a corner of his teeth present. âYeah. Worth it, though.â
âBe serious,â you reprimand. Looks like heâs gonna have to take it easy, which means no going at it like animals until heâs on the mend. âNo more until you feel better, yeah?â
âSays who?â
âBabe.â
His deadly pout almost breaks your resolve. âFine.âÂ
But you can wait. Youâre sure it wonât take long, and for this man? Youâll wait however long you need to.Â
Besides, thereâs plenty of things you can do in the meantime that donât require running into hard objects.Â
âGood. Now letâsâŠâ You turn away to get started before youâre held, and pulled back into yet another embrace.Â
What the hell is happening today? Your lungs and your melting pile of a brain can only take so much. Itâs beautifully overwhelming how Yoongi canât seem to let you go, because youâre the one that always loses control.Â
This whole time, itâs been you that canât hold yourself back.Â
So now? Being on the other side? You donât think you ever want him to restrain himself again.Â
This time, he moves slow. Sensuously slow, and it would occur to you that heâs finding a very cheeky loophole to your plan if you werenât so hazy-eyed.Â
Whatever Yoongiâs doing, you wonât stop him.Â
Your back touches a counter before Yoongi cages you in, and your lips mold together as perfectly as his body does with yours. Your unhurried strokes match his, and your minds communicate without a single word.Â
Thereâs yearning still ever present. But thereâs comfort in abundance, and a whole new level of need.Â
After he pulls away, you can visibly see him drink you in from head to toe.Â
âYou know.. Iâm good holding off on all the other shit.â Pulling you in, his lips curve as he confidently declares, âBut Iâm never gonna stop kissing you.âÂ
His hands, his lips, his words. They all have healing powers, youâre so sure of it. If Yoongi hasnât yet realized his unending pain has blossomed into a safe haven, you need to let him know no matter what,Â
âGood.â
Thereâs still a pining in his eyes, but he lets you free, hand skirting your hip before he walks to his room. âGonna change then Iâll help.âÂ
âYou donât have to, baby,â you say as you struggle to catch your breath. âI got it.âÂ
Three minutes later, heâs chopping an onion anyway.Â
But youâre loving how serene everything feels with the two of you prepping and dicing, thumps of knives on wood intertwining in sound before you laugh at his crying over the pesky vegetable. Maybe if he wore contacts instead of specs, heâd be better off.Â
Not that his choice of eyewear is what youâre complaining about. But those glasses paired with the cream tees heâs been wearing? There will be hell to pay as soon as you get a chance at revenge.Â
Your pot is set to boil for a bit, so you finally rest against the counter and start a timer on his microwave. âGo ahead,â you gesture to your very handsome cooking partner. âYou can sit now.â
âHuh? Weâre not done yet.â
âOh.â Blinking, you tilt your head in confusion because you couldâve sworn you heard him yawn a couple times. âYou arenât tired?â
âI am,â he says before squeezing his eyes, rapid blinks to follow. âBut Iâm fine here.â
You toss and turn the food around, sprinkling a little more seasoning and hearing the bubbles and fizzes. When you stir a little more, a sudden thought occurs, halting your movements and spinning you around,Â
âAre you staying there to watch my ass.â
Yoongiâs slow smile gives everything away, but he also makes up for the blatant staring.Â
âCanât deny thatâs one of the things.â Pushing off the sink, he stands right next to you, slotting a hand behind your neck and angling you for a kiss. âBut I meant it earlier. I justâŠâ
Youâre completely silent as you watch him slide his eyes from your face to the sizzling food. Whatever heâs thinking about, youâre gonna give him all the room to talk.Â
âJust like being where you are.âÂ
How you went from almost running out of his door to here, you arenât quite sure. But youâre grateful for that split second of him deciding to fight for the two of you instead of against, because you really were going to leave.Â
And you may have taken much, much longer to even try going back.Â
Your voice is barely heard over the aromatic smell and fizzle, âGood thing I like having you around.â When he smiles again, you let out a breath of a giggle, going back to shuffling the pan around and tilting your head to the fridge. âI put some fruit in there if you wanna eat that, too.â
âIâm down.â
âK.â
Your food is ready soon enough, and the two of you eat while talking about easy topics. Like work and your workplace dynamics, what Yoongiâs team has been working on at the studio.Â
At one point, your curiosity about the album release party grows from something he says. âSpeaking of. The partyâs on Friday, right?â
âYeah.â
âOkay, I thought so,â you deflate, setting your bowl down on the table. âSorry he canât go.â
âHuh?â
Your body stills. âWait. Did he not say anything? About his trip being extended?â
So much for nothing in his life being wrong. From the lost look on his face, you may have given him another reason to fold back in on himself. âNo.. No, he didnât.â
Both of you sit in silence.Â
This could be nothing. Right? That means your brother is confident he can make it so thereâs no point in telling Yoongi heâs gonna miss it. Or maybe heâs not trying hard enough and then not being able to say it to his face?Â
âIâm sorry,â you apologize. âI thought he told you.â
âItâs okay.â Clearly itâs not. âNot much to do about it now.â
âYoongi⊠What if he knows?â At your own question, you stiffen, curling into a proverbial ball. Fear and the sick backfire of fibbing has your mouth going drier than desert air. âWhat if he actually knows?â
Setting down his chopsticks, Yoongi looks your way, eyes unreadable behind his specs. âIf he did, do you think heâd leave us alone?â
Heâs got a point. âGuess not.âÂ
âMm.â Flicking his eyes to the window, he adjusts uncomfortably in his chair. âAnd I dunno if I mentioned this, but.. He thinks I got back with my ex.â
âFuck, really?âÂ
âThatâs the real reason why he hasnât been talking to me. Maybe he thinks sheâs gonna be there on Friday.â
âOh.â Your shoulders sag, and sag. Not owning up to your relationship is one thing; Yoongi having to dwell in his previous relationship is another. âIs that⊠worse?â
âShit.â Reaching across wood, you close your hand around his fingers for support. Itâs the only thing you can think to do. At least, itâs what you would want if you were in his shoes. âI think you should tell him she wonât be.â
A million seconds later, Yoongi thankfully agrees. âYeah, I will.â
You feel better. Somewhat. At least a little less nauseous about the possibility of your brother knowing.Â
But it still sucks knowing that heâs actively avoiding Yoongi because of an ex he used to have.Â
How bad was it back then if this is the case? What exactly happened? Is this why Yoongi went radio silent on you for weeks?
It seems like he doesnât even wanna talk about her. So you wonât pry just yet, as much as you wanna know every single thing sheâs done wrong so you can hound her through every timeline in existence.Â
Instead, you talk about a much better subject,Â
âWe should feed my cat now.â
And you quickly laugh at the saucy glint in Yoongiâs eyes.Â
â
â
Everything is set where it needs to be. Sugarâs food and water fill their respective bowls, your shoulder leans into Yoongiâs good side, and his arm rests around your back as heâs propped up by his banged up doorway.Â
You remember the first time you saw him lean against the wood like this. Only that time, you were a shell of a girl, waiting with shaky breaths and shaken confidence to hear his response to your inappropriate request.Â
Who wouldâve thought that youâd be on the same side as him all these months later? In his arms, resting a head on his warm chest?Â
When you let out a short chuckle, Yoongi turns to your smile. âHmm?âÂ
âNothing,â you wisp out. âJust thinking about us.âÂ
His fingers press into your side a fraction more, and you can feel him lift his head again. âMe, too.âÂ
Umm.Â
You can say things like that. He isnât allowed!Â
Youâre about to set some one-sided rules before your gift pops out of the bushes a few feet away.Â
âMy baby!â you quietly call, leaving Yoongiâs side to crouch down. âCome here, love. You hungry?â
She cautiously makes her way over, sniffing your hand when you leave it outstretched. After careful consideration, the little one nudges your palm, letting you glide fingers down her back as she approaches her bowls.Â
âYouâre so tiny,â you observe with slight pity. âWeâll get you well fed in no timeââ
âHey, Sugar! Oh, is this her? Sheâs gorgeous, no wonder!â
Huh? Sugar?Â
Who else knows the catâs name already?
Your neck almost strains when you look up to see whoâs talking. When you notice an older lady donning a really comfy, fluffy robe, you feel like it looks super familiar before you stand.Â
âHi,â you greet before introducing yourself, extending your hand and shaking the womanâs soft, delicate fingers. âSorry if we were too loud.â
âCall me Miss Dion. And you werenât too loud this time, sweetie,â she says with a wink, glancing down at the kitty eating what you laid out. âWas just cominâ out to water my plants so itâs good to see youâre here, too. Looks like he finally got some sense back in that head of his.â
âIâm standing right here, you know.â
âOh, I know!â
Back? How long has she known about you? Do her and Yoongi actually converse regularly? Their banter is⊠Really adorable.Â
Itâs making you fall even more in love with the man biting his cheek in amusement.Â
Wait.Â
Is Yoongi Sugar?Â
That is so fucking cute you could cry.Â
âIâm back to take care of this guy,â you explain with a head tilt. âAnd the little one, of course.âÂ
Itâs when you say this that Miss Dion notices the bandages on Yoongiâs face, concern pushing down her brows. âWhat happened to you, young man?â
âNothing to worry about.âÂ
âYou sure? I got some ointment in my kitchen somewhereââ
âItâs all goodââ
âWeâll take it,â you cut him off, not looking but feeling his stare on your face. âHow much do we owe you?âÂ
âOh, donât you worry about that.â With a snuff at Yoongi and a smile your way, Miss Dion heads inside to fetch a bottle.
In the meantime, you give your lover a quiet stare before bending down to run your hands over soft fur.Â
âPapa Sugar is gonna need that so he canât argue,â you coo to your cat, cheekily ignoring Yoongiâs sputtering puff of air above your head.
âPapa Sugar? Really?â
You glance up to his smile with a mischievous one of your own. âWhat, you wanna be Sugar Daddy instead?â
The swirl in your belly is instant. Because Yoongi can only look out into the distance, biting his lip and failing to hide his grin.
Sigh. If only he didnât have those injuries across his face. Youâd push him back into the door and slam it shut if it was any other day.Â
Patience, patience, patience.Â
Those hits arenât gonna heal with just one round of gauze.Â
When you have to replace the cotton patches, at least youâll have something to help.Â
â
â
Itâs not until youâre about to tuck in for the night that Yoongi approaches your side of the bed. Judging by the headphones slung around his neck, heâs about to work, so you assume heâs just coming to give you a kiss goodnight.Â
But after he does exactly that, he asks you a question that warms your chest,Â
âWhereâs your keys.âÂ
âIn there,â you motion to the nearest wall, bag propped right under his windowsill. âInside pocket, I think.âÂ
Yoongi bends with a prolonged grunt, slowly rummaging until he finds your jangling keyring with its charms. When he grabs it, he silently sits on the edge up against your stomach, body heat permeating your tee while he fiddles with the clasps.Â
God, youâre so in trouble. You know exactly what heâs doing.Â
Unlike the last time he offered you complete access to his place, this time he didnât even hesitate. And the way he secures a key amongst the loop, itâs his silent way of cementing permanence.Â
Thatâs not another key for you to borrow.
Because that key is yours.
â
â
continued in angel, pt. 2
pitstop inbox before pt2!! | join the server!
a/n: holy crap we're doing it we are actually back in the main storyline?! how do we feel right now because i am over the damn moon diving into this story again. here's a slight pitstop before you make your way over to part two (THE CONTINUATION IS IN A REBLOG!) so take a breather before heading into the resttttttt
++ feedback box:
â„ of course, any reblogs/comments/messages are appreciated!
â„ for the ones that are too shy to reblog with a review, comment on this, or send a message, i went ahead and made another anonymous form where you can send in what you think!
â„ no emails collected, no need to put in a username. itâs literally just a comment dropbox :D feedback can be as short/sweet or as long as youâd like!
â„ here!
++ more links:
â„ masterlistÂ
â„ three tangerines masterlist
a/n 2: we did this for 3tanfugue and the energy was great! just like last time, some of you guys suggested that we have post goals to encourage interaction. no one voted against it yet, so we'll keep it goin!
note goal: since we're back in main storyline, upping the goal! 1,000 notes is the goal, so when we hit that, 3tan14 will be dropped as soon as it's done! thank you all for reading and would love to hear any thoughts: what did you like about the chapter? how did a certain scene make you feel? what are you excited to see next? any shares, comments, tags, and reblogs with commentary count, and i appreciate anything you guys have to say.
explicit warnings: cursing, thigh riding, cowgirl, oral (m rec), naughty studio time(??), couch sex, rough sex, giving yoongi the business, bold as fuck reader, choking, spanking, penetrative sex, kissing deserves to be here too lol, alexa play no hands by waka flocka, deep throating, hair/head tugging, nipple play, yoongi in that gd tank, yoongi in those gd glasses, teasing, titty fucking hello!!!!, stripping while he watchesâŠ. yeah, missionary, sub!3tanyoongi?????, scratching, multiple orgasms, protected sex, emotional sex, the glasses.. stay on??, good god theyâre so hot iâm blushing
â
â
Itâs morning when Jimin gets a call.Â
Shifting in sheets that arenât his, he sleepily blinks once before eyeing the blue light with a squint, wondering who dares wake him up before his natural rise. What time even is it anyway? Itâs gotta be an ungodly hour if his circadian rhythm is disturbed.Â
Still, he grabs his cell from the nightstand, flinching at the movement behind him and inwardly slinging out curses.Â
Because waking him up is one thing.Â
But if anyone disturbs Taehyung heâs gonna give them hellâ
Min Yoongi: Incoming Call
Shit.
Jimin yanks the covers off, rushing out of bed and snapping Tae awake anyway. For what? Donât fucking know, but theyâre ready. Wherever. Whatever. They already stayed up clutching their phones until they physically couldnât keep their eyes open.Â
Because as much as Yoongi assured him nothing would happen, Jimin still couldnât let go of his car keys.
Answering slow, he feels his chest winding and winding, eyes locked with Taehyung while they both wait on edge, ââŠYoongi?â
âYeah.â
Thank the fucking stars.Â
Yoongiâs okay. Heâs on the line. He made it to morning or whatever fucking time it is, and heâs doing exactly what he said he would.
And itâs enough, enough, enough.
Burns zing up the corners of Jiminâs eyes, and he swipes hard as Taehyung moves, likely to hear whatâs happening and even more likely to just be by his side.Â
Jimin is grateful for either one. But he tries to keep composure as he croaks, âYou better have woken me up for a reason.â
The slight hum on the line induces a wobbly smile. âYou slept?â
âFuck you,â Jimin shakily laughs, wiping liquid relief from an eye before Taehyungâs thumb brushes tenderly over the other. His gaze is thankful while continuing, âWe did but not much.â
âSorry.â
âItâs okay.â Sniffling, Jimin walks to Taeâs door, letting him into the hallway first and finally drinking in the sight of his ass in those sweats. Because he can finally function like a normal, smitten loser again. âWeâll come over so we canââ
âNo need.â
âWhat?â Nope. Back to panic mode. And judging from his boyfriendâs posture, Taehyung has backpedaled into that, too. âWhat do you mean no need?â
Thereâs a slight pause on the line, and small noises make their way through the speaker. It sounds like bedsheets, but it also sounds likeâŠÂ
âSheâs still sleeping.â
Oh.
Oh, shit.
A tidal wave of relief crashes into Jiminâs ducts as he hangs his head, palming his face caught in a heavy tide of emotion. When he turns, Taehyung fairs no better, his eyes red and fingers wiping at a perfect, perfect cheek. One of them sniffles, but Jimin canât tell if itâs him or not, because his vision is blurry and his heart is beating, beating, beating again.Â
Whether you know it or not, whatever you did last night may have just changed Yoongiâs entire life.
Because Jimin knows this man through and through. Years of picking up his habits and tells didnât amount to nothing. Itâs how he was able to sense exactly when to intervene, and how he knew exactly what that hauntingly hollow tone in Yoongiâs voice meant when he busted in that day.Â
The tone he hears now? The man that just spoke on the line?Â
That is a Min Yoongi so in love he canât even hide it over the phone.Â
Fuck.Â
Gathering himself, Jimin squeaks out, âI⊠Iâm glad youâŠâ What the fuck does he say? Every thought jams in his throat so hard he has to hand the phone off.
Thankfully, Taehyung perfectly continues his thoughts, voice scratching rocks under a waking river, âWeâre glad youâre both safe.â
âMm.â
âSo whenâs the wedding?â
Jimin huffs through a fresh batch of tears, clearing his face before grinning at Tae very seriously awaiting an answer. Honestly, at this point? Itâs not far-fetched. Jiminâs seeing your future clearer than his present, and maybe he will be a fun uncle sooner than he thinks.
If only Yoongi would just get the fucking talk with your brother over with.Â
But Jimin understands the hesitation. If he were in that same position, thereâs no telling when he would be courageous enough to stand up to the guy. Thereâs a reason heâs quick to command a room, and his lifelong mission to protect his younger sister made him grow up a lot faster than everyone else.Â
Still⊠Yoongi just deserves to be happy. And youâre the very obvious answer to helping with that.Â
As much as he may have wanted some chances of his own, Jimin is grateful you found your way into his best friendâs heart. Not just anyone is invited inside, and even less people can truly be allowed to stay.Â
And youâre probably the only one that has permanent residence.Â
âYou guys should get some sleep.â
Taehyung pouts right on cue, and Jimin canât fight those sleepy, droopy eyes. âYou didnât answer me.â
Cute as fuck! He must be stopped. Taking the phone, Jimin speaks into the line fully recovered, shooting his cheeky partner a teasing glare, âWe will if you get some, too.â
âCanât.â
âWhy not?â
âGot some things to do at the studioââ
âNo!â They reject together, both equally as appalled because what the fuck kinda answer is that?Â
âAfter what happened last night? Are you crazy?â
âWhat happened to spending time with her? Men!âÂ
âHeâs going on a business trip, I canât lose to him.â
âSo what?â Tae asks before they both share an even further confused look. Yoongi may be a lovesick fool but that doesnât give him an excuse to be a dumbass! âYouâre just gonna leave her alone?â
Thereâs a sigh on the line before Jimin plants a hand on his hip. âNot just that. You gotta rest, too, bro. If she doesnât tell you to take it easy or at least get checkedâwhich she willâweâre going over there to annoy you.âÂ
âYou serious?â
âYes, Iâm serious.â Jimin cocks his head and leans closer to the phone. âAt least rest easy for the next couple days. Especially if you have all this time to see each other.â
The timing couldnât be more perfect. Your brother is leaving for his trip and Yoongi caught some unfortunate hits to his ribs. The dude basically has a free pass to spend the whole week with you, and heâs not even taking full advantage of it? Oh, the things Jimin has to say about the thin line of work ethic and relationship effort.Â
âIâll think about it.â
âThink about it for a long time,â Taehyung cuts in before Jimin can pop off, walking away into the living room.Â
Itâs fine. Let him figure out that you arenât a woman he can just leave. Frankly? That would tickle Jimin to no end to see Yoongi folding his plans so fast just to be with you.Â
But he spares him the tirade only because youâre fast asleep right next to him. âThank you for calling, man.â
âSaid I would.â
âI know.âÂ
Because above all else, Jimin is happy to hear that voice. Even if itâs obvious heâs a little banged up from last night, itâs still Yoongi. In one piece. Thatâs all Jimin wanted, and he canât thank you enough,
âDonât overwork yourself, and stay with her as long as you can.â
Thereâs a small laugh on the other end. âI plan on it, Chim.â
And Jimin catches on to why. âIâm holding you to that then.âÂ
â
â
Dawn breaks through open blinds, stretching its orange tint across a clean, spotless table.Â
You donât know what got you up so early. But when you peer into the kitchen, you tell yourself you woke up right on time.Â
Because seeing Yoongi when youâre wide awake is better than any dream youâll ever have.
Not because of his appearance, even though the sight of him sends a pang through your chest. No. Itâs the way heâs quietly prepping a morning meal, using the arm on his better side thatâs not sporting a nasty hit to the ribs, without you even asking.Â
Bits of sunlight dance right out of your eyes.
The effort. The consideration. This man shouldnât be lifting a finger, yet here he is cooking before you even left his bed. Isnât this the same man that got caught up in a fight hours ago? Isnât this the same man you almost walked out on with a frozen heart?Â
Yes. But heâs also the same man that loves you. And you still canât grasp that concept in any of the fingers playing with his tee you borrowed.
âHi,â you whisper, telling him a thousand things.Â
To which he regards before smiling soft, voice travelling over linoleum and circling around your heart, âMorning, doll.â
Damn. You hear it. Yoongiâs sore as hell.Â
But instead of getting into that right away, you silently take residence by his side. Because this moment feels too delicate, and you admire his willingness to take care of you unprompted. You didnât even know youâd eat before going back home.Â
With a hand warming his back, you wait until Yoongiâs done tossing food on the stove to peck his morning-chilled cheek. âThank you for cooking,â you murmur, admiring those beautiful brown eyes. âSleep okay?â
âCus of you,â your lover softly responds, eyeing your lips before gliding back up to your gaze. âYou?â
Ugh. Heâs gotta know those glasses are so unfair. Theyâve gotten you repeatedly before, and theyâre certainly getting you now.Â
But you canât help but deflate at the cuts behind those rims, while knowing there are even more bruises hiding underneath his oversized tee. How is Yoongi cooking right now? How is he even awake? âSame.âÂ
âGood.âÂ
These instant, deep shivers at his deeper morning voice will never, ever go away. But anything you wanna do about them isnât important right now. Right now, you need to make sure Yoongi is either okay, or finds a way to get better.Â
Sliding your hands down the slopes of his chest, you delicately rest one on his ribs. âDoes it still hurt?âÂ
Yikes. That wince is enough. But Yoongi doesnât shy away from your touch, and you appreciate the way he stays honest. âItâs sore. But I should be good.â
âYou gonna get it checked?â
Thereâs a slight upward tilt of his lips. âNot right now.â At least the honesty persists, as much as you donât want him following the typical manly response to hospital visits. âBut I will if you want me to.â
âPlease go,â you gently urge, lest you disturb the soft morning dew before it melts with the sunrise. âFor me?â
Only sizzles from the stove fill the space until Yoongi nods, and his voice is just as low and tender, âIâll go after work.â
Oh. âYouâre working today?â
Just like breakfast, you didnât expect this, either. Frankly, you figured neither of you were gonna even think about work, much less go. Sure, heâs due a hospital visit and you owe some friends immediate explanations for your absence. But other than that, shouldnât Yoongi be resting?Â
Does his craft truly mean that much?Â
Well, shit. You gotta respect his work ethic, thatâs for damn sure. Because you would sequester yourself to your bedroom and have endless dates with your television if you were sporting a good jab or two. This music thing must mean more to Yoongi than you previously thought. And who are you to step on that dream?Â
Suddenly, all thoughts and concerns flee from the kiss on your cheek.Â
âIâll stay if you stay,â he says, turning to move the pan and scrunching his face with a grunt. Fuck.Â
âIâŠâ Shit, you were gonna go back to the house anyway. And from Yoongiâs smartass smirk, you can tell he already knew that. âJust need to check on him, too. And he doesnât have a car right now, so. I should at least give him a ride.âÂ
âFigured.â In a move so domestic your head spins, Yoongi turns your body and gently pats your butt. âNow go sit. Letâs eat and figure this out.âÂ
â
â
As you devour a flawless meal and clean your dishes, you plan out the day. Youâll head home and check on your brother while Yoongi heads to the studio, and then youâll rendezvous with your friends to hang out until heâs done with work. Theyâre already lighting up your phone like no oneâs businessâespecially Yuri.Â
Yoongi flicks the sink off before you both head to his bedroom, and you melt at the way he slowly wraps his arms around your front halfway there, all four of your legs slowing to close the rest of the distance.Â
Whatâs he doing? This is joyfully new, but you have a pretty tight deadline. Warming his forearm and your own cheeks, you chuckle out, âWe have to hustle, old man.âÂ
âYou hustle me all the time,â he accuses into your shoulder blade, kissing its ridge and making you reconsider walking out the door entirely. âLemme have this.âÂ
Your second laugh is more subdued, and youâre right between his bed and desk when you lift both hands to hold him close. âYou have everything I got,â you wisp into his skin, planting your lips once, twice before you feel his arms press further in. âSo this is nothing.âÂ
Seconds and silence slide by, the delicate veil of early morning still hovering around the room. When Yoongi doesnât say anything, you make to turn and face him.Â
But youâre stopped before your heart skips.Â
âI could stay like this all day,â he admits, voice so low it rumbles through your bones. âAnd itâd be perfect.âÂ
âWhat, you donât wanna see my face?â You joke with a giggle. âRude, but thatâs fine.âÂ
Yoongi only buries his nose further, his glasses sliding against your skin peeking from his shirt. âIâm much braver right here, doll.âÂ
Oh.Â
The leap your heart does is more of a dive, plummeting into the seafoam swirling around your feet. All the words you want to respond with jump off right after, leaving you with nothing but the clouds in your eyes.Â
You donât quite know what he means by that. But it feels like those six words hold the weight of a thousand, so you simply let another kiss on his smooth forearm linger. âDo you want me to go with you?âÂ
A puff of laughter warms you right through and, despite his earlier admission, Yoongi does slowly spin you around.Â
And when you follow, you realize youâre much braver when you arenât facing him, too.Â
âItâs not that, babe,â he says through a dashing curve. âBut the offer was cute.âÂ
âI take it back then.âÂ
âDamn!âÂ
Both of your laughs whoosh out and collide, sweeping as Yoongi pinches your side and you flinch towards the bed. âYou fuckerâ!â
Before you know it, your back hits a comforter before a weight presses your stomach, emotions clashing as youâre elated and shy and immediately concerned for your boyfriendâs side. âBaby, be carefulââ
Lips capture yours, sucking up your warning before a hand slides under your head. Sighing, you arch into his chest, feeling the weight of his chains slip across your breasts.Â
Euphoria isnât an adequate enough word to describe how you feel. Where there used to be flutters in your ribcage now reside strong, powerful wing beats, gusts of want and desire lifting you off the ground and launching you into clear skies. Starlight of every color exists within each kiss you share, and your fingers feebly grab his tee to keep you from falling back down to earth.Â
âIf we donât go now,â Yoongi rasps before sliding his mouth against yours, âWeâre never going anywhere again.âÂ
âI know,â you whisper, willingly letting him kiss you once more, âIs that a promise?âÂ
âFuck, I wish.âÂ
You do, too. But you know youâre running out of time for what you need to do. And werenât you just saying you had to respect his aspirations? Shit, you really do need to snap out of it. âCome on,â you order with a pat to his chest. âWe have all week to do this. We got time.âÂ
Turns out, youâre still amongst the heavens. The way Yoongiâs looking at you? This is the closest youâll ever get to being held by an angel.Â
Did he get more handsome overnight? Or is it the light in his eyes sustained since his confession in the kitchen? You donât quite know, and you may never pinpoint why, but the tug he has on your heart spans space and time.Â
And youâll run through both forever to keep meeting him again and again.Â
Burns prick your eyes, but he mercifully stands before he can catch any evidence of your yearning.Â
Just like that, the two of you bounce back to getting ready, with him sliding notebooks and headphones in a backpack while you change into your own clothes. As you sling your bag over a shoulder, he reaches for the closest hoodie, and you wordlessly make your way to the front door.Â
You really do hope he gets looked at today. But just like the calm after a storm, you want to encourage him gently rather than shove him out. At least he seems receptive to your gentle suggestions.
But after you ask one more time and he simply nods, you lower your eyes to his kicks. âSorry if Iâm nagging. Iâd just worry less if you went right away, thatâs all.â
âYou arenât nagging, babe.â Your freshly bloomed lover reaches out to hold your wrist, smoothing a rough thumb over your skin. Fucking hell, you canât help but frown at the gashes and cuts marring his knuckles. âIâll go as soon as I can.â
Not just his hands, but his face. His ribs. And maybe other places you havenât even seen yet.Â
You donât wanna leave his side.Â
But you have to head out before your brother leaves. Things need to get patched up before he flies out into more stress, and you owe him an apology for walking out when he was still aching. Based on Yoongiâs physical state? Your brother could be hiding some big wounds and you didnât even wanna talk to him.Â
However. Was last night necessary? Absolutely. You cannot entertain the possible outcomes had you not tried hard enough to get through Yoongiâs door. His eyes were so dulled, his hands felt so cold. What would have happened if you didnât force yourself inside?Â
Why was that guitar smashed to pieces?Â
This is also why you refuse to leave. So many questions, so many things you still donât know. Like what all happened when you were separated? And how in the hell is this man in love with you?
âI donât wanna go,â you confess, instantly encased in his arms and warmth. âIâd much rather keep kissing you.âÂ
âTrue,â he says with a resigned huff, shifting his glasses with an adorable nose scrunch. If only he didnât have so many little red lines of conflict on his face. âBut we both have stuff to take care of, so letâs get all that done first.â
âUgh, fine.â Your groan is more teasing than serious, and Yoongiâs laugh is nothing but understanding.Â
Damn. You still feel it. You really donât wanna go. Be it the rawness of last night still on your skin, or the confessions still on your tongues, you just wanna stay by his side. âSorry,â you breathe out, lacing your fingers to pepper love along his strong, reddened ridges. âIâm serious. I donât wanna leave you right now.â
Walking out of Yoongiâs door just doesnât feel right. Even if heâs right there and will be following you out. Is this feeling normal? Are you supposed to feel this tightly woven to someone? Because the stitching between your hearts has only gotten stronger in the tempest of last night, as if you bonded together just to hold on for dear life.Â
Maybe thatâs exactly what happened. And itâs exactly why you can barely take one step out of his place.Â
âThen donât.â
Not one second passes before your chin is held, and lips slide so tenderly across yours that they may as well melt into your touch. Your reaction is quickly swooped into his mouth, and everything falls away as you let him seize your every thought. Lightning from last night zips out of your limbs, your toes, your fingers clasping his loose tee.Â
You might just cry where you stand.
How have his kisses gotten even better? How have you never felt this way even though youâve done this far more times than you were ever supposed to? It should be impossible, and yet, this man finds even more ways to astound you.Â
Yoongi slips a hand over your cheek, giving one more beautiful push of his lips as he confesses, âI donât wanna leave you, either.âÂ
And your breath stutters onto his features. âYou, too?â
Slow, he kisses your cheek, the clear rim of his specs skimming your nose. When he draws back, you look right into his eyes, wondering why heâs watching your mouth instead.Â
âMe, too.â Yoongi kisses your other side with a quiet peck. âFuck, me, too.âÂ
You fucking hate what you have to do, but you donât have a choice.Â
With one last lingering kiss, you both gather enough courage to set out and do what you must.Â
â
â
Your house is already a flurry of activity as you enter to see your brother in the kitchen, packing his leather duffle thatâs a constant companion on his trips.Â
Of course. The memory of him purchasing the lavish accessory pops into your head every time you watch him scurry around, dimples ever present on his proud cheeks. Itâs almost enough to make you smile yet again.Â
But you canât when the same face is currently scratched to hell. Just like Yoongiâs, if not worse.Â
Fuck, is he really gonna travel looking like that?Â
âHey,â he rasps out, still fighting off slumber. âYouâre back earlier than I thought.âÂ
âWanted to check on you before we left.â Fuck, your voice sounds like itâs being forced through a clogged pipe. Loosen the hell up! âAnd dude. Put some bandaids on, yeah?âÂ
âYeah, just give me a sec. Making sure I have everything before my ride gets here.âÂ
âHuh?â He got a ride? Youâre here now so you can take him to the airport. âYou sure you donât need me to drive you?âÂ
âYeah, itâs all good. I didnât know you were coming back.âÂ
Shit. His body seems just as angular as it did last night. Which, quite frankly, could still be from what went down in the lot.Â
Because even though you see both men banged up, you suddenly realize you donât actually know what all transpired.Â
After all, there wasnât much talk of it after you walked into the tempest of Yoongiâs living room.
Of course, you arenât gonna bring it up just this second. There are other things to ask about and make sure of first. âWallet? Phone? Passport?âÂ
âYup, yup, uhh.. Yup.âÂ
Zippers sling in the quiet morning air as you continue, âAnd youâre coming back on Friday, right?â
âOh.. Nah.â When you start crossing the kitchen, your brother hauls his leather bag over his better shoulder. Honestly, no one would be able to tell the other oneâs bruised with his suit on. That thing damn well covers everything except the cuts on his face and hands. âSaturday.âÂ
You pause in your journey to the medicine cabinet. âWait.. Saturday? The release partyâs on Friday.â
âYeah.. I know.â
What the fuck? Thatâs bullshit theyâre keeping him longer than they have to. Struggling to understand how corporate can keep your brother on a leash and get away with it, you urge, âTell them to at least let you go home a day early. Donât you wanna support your friends?â
âYou mean Yoongi?â
A zing of terror zips through your eyes, freezing every vein in an instant.Â
The fuck was that question? Never mind. Stay calm stay calm stay fucking calm. âUhh, yeah, heâs one of them? But the other guys, too, right? I know you care about them and this is huge.â
Mercifully, your sibling just shakes his head and waves you off. âDonât you think I already tried? I donât wanna miss it but I donât have a choice. Conference schedule is pretty tight and Iâm heading the panel on Friday.â
âIs it in the morning? You can fly out afterââ
âWhy are you fighting so hard?â
âWhy arenât you fighting harder!â
Okay, what in the hell is happening right now? Screw optics and how this must look for you, your brother needs to be there. Him and Yoongi are the tightest of friends, the most ride or die duo youâve ever seen. You canât picture a timeline where he misses this monumental moment, and itâs starting to really upset you that heâs barely trying.Â
âAlright, you know what?â Hard steps surge forward as you stand rigid, a duffle hastily dumped onto tile. âYou donât know what Iâve tried. You donât even know if I even told him yet.â
Fucking shit. You hold his stare before turning away, tossing out the idea of bandages entirely and searing footsteps into the hallwayâ
âOr do you.â
Before icing over with the unforgiving frost of zero gravity space.Â
Slow, you turn, not quite facing him but not backing down, either. ââŠExcuse me?â
âYou heard me. You talkinâ? What else has he been doing to you?â
Oh. Fuck that.Â
Doing to you?Â
Fuck all of this. This is too much to handle right now and you know youâre gonna snap if he keeps pushing because you are not having this conversation right before he leaves. Youâve already thought about this before, right? You cannot fuck with his head right before business trips because he needs to be on and locked in.Â
But now heâs fucking with your temper and those are some choice fucking words pulled out of his ass.Â
You donât think youâve ever legitimately threatened this man to his face and meant it before, and it tears a sharp corner of your heart, âYou better be very careful. With whatever you wanna say next.â
The air proves too thick to slice. While your body stands aflame, your brother is iced over, brimming with an energy that damn near takes physical form. âAll Iâm saying is? I find out some fucking bullshit is going onââ
No no no, not now.
Reacting fast is your only instinct, brain haywire and fizzling fizzling boiling. Harsh, you spin on your heel and shout the first thing you can think of, âOh, come onââ
âYou better hope to god youâre ready for whatâs comingââ
âStop!â Fuck fuck fuck, this is so frustrating because your head is exploding and your body is screaming to just tell him already. Fuck the consequences at this point this is ludicrous.Â
Doing to you? Yoongi? How dare he speak about his best friend like that how dare he accuse him without outright saying the words all you have to do is tell your brother how wrong heâs got it.Â
But you canât be the one. Yoongi said he would, and he probably took months to get to that point of strengthâand healing, from what you can tell.Â
This is between them. Them. You have to honor that, as much as you wanna just confess everything now and deal with it yourself.Â
But goddamn your brother is pulsing with anger and itâs leaking into your own charged air.Â
What does he think is happening? Does he think Yoongiâs just, what, playing you? Heâs wrong. Heâs so wrong. Yoongiâs been nothing but the best thing thatâs ever happened to you and shit your heart hurts becauseâŠ
Your brother is valid in thinking that.Â
How foolish. Didnât you guard your heart from Yoongi for the longest? Didnât everything start because you figured you knew who he was because of his reputation? You got him all wrong, too. So how can you be mad at your brother for doing the same?Â
Fuck, think. Just think before someone gets hurt.Â
Because if you arenât careful, someoneâor multiple someonesâwill get hurt in seconds. You have to bear the pain alone right now. To protect them both, you have to keep your trembling mouth shut.Â
And? You have to admit that something isnât fair here. Not to you, not to Yoongi, but to him. Last night was rough as fuck but, while you both got to have raw, beautiful closure, the one standing in front of you had to go to sleep in an empty house.Â
So chill the fuck out.Â
Breathing to cool down, you tense and loosen, tense and loosen. âI get it. Youâre angry, and you have a lot going on. But,â you bite down on your lip to keep going. âWeâre talking about something else. Weâre talking about you, and Iâm still pissed you even let those guys goad you into a fight. What are we, twelve?â
Seething, your sibling takes the switch of pace. But it is not what you want to hear. âAre you seriâ? What the hell was I supposed to do? That son of a bitch grabbed youââ
âI know,â you recoil. âDonât tell me like you were there, because you werenât.â
Finallyâfinallyâthose angry lines in his face vanish.Â
But they make way for something much worse than anger. Because your older brother, someone thatâs been there for you your whole life..Â
Looks absolutely stricken over the one time he wasnât.Â
Damn it.Â
Regretful, you drop your shoulders in exhaustion and quiet compromise. When you continue, your voice is much softer, âBut I told you: they were. Your friends, they were there because they knew you wanted that. Jimin got me away, Yoongi took me home and stayed.âÂ
You really have got to stop saying his name like you love him. It could start becoming too obvious.Â
Shuddering, you shift your weight, folding your arms and shrinking into yourself.Â
That night, despite Yoongiâs best and most gentle efforts, still clings to where that loser touched you at Dalo. You hate that you havenât gotten over it, and you loathe the way you still rub over the same spot. Over, and over. âWhat did you want him to do? Leave me here?â
âNo.âÂ
âExactly. And he didnât.â You adjust your stance again, making an impromptu gamble as you decide to let some truth leak out. Because your brother is owed at least this much. âAnd fine, you wanna know something? We do talk more because of it.â
Your brotherâs head snaps up, and you brace. Because if you show any shred of weakness or hesitation, heâll see right through your weak attempt to hide most of the truth,Â
âBut donât ever accuse him of doing anything to me. That was fucked up to say and you know it.â
âFuck.â In agreement, he rubs his hair back. âIt was. Iâm sorry.âÂ
âTrust me,â you swallow, hating that this is how things have to be for now. âYou have nothing to worry about. Heâs never.. Never done anything to me, anyway.âÂ
Itâs not a lie. Everything heâs done has been with you. For you. Because of you.Â
But your heartâs in anguish as it sinks. Because that expression on your older siblingâs face can only be one thing. Â
Pure. Utter. Relief.
Fire singes your eyes before you can quell the flame. Itâs the hardest technical truth to swallow.Â
Sure, he doesnât have anything to worry about as far as you being safe. And on top of that, he doesnât have to worry about any fake shit because Yoongi confessed to you last night.
But as far as his best friend sleeping with and now dating his sister behind his back? That is still very much sitting right in the center of the table.Â
And now youâre starting to see just how fucked all three of you are as soon as you sit down to eat the truth.Â
But Yoongi said heâd be the one to tell, so he will.Â
This feeling is so fucking miserable, though.Â
In the end, your brother is effectively convinced, raking a hand across his head and sighing. âJimin told me what all went down at Dalo, I just⊠Last night was⊠Fucked up.âÂ
âWell, yeah.â
âNo. See, this is just like what you said to me. You canât say it like you were there.â
Itâs your stomachâs turn to twist. âSo? You were scratched and bruised to hell, and YâŠâ Shut up, shut up. Youâre not supposed to know about the state of anyone else. âAnd you were⊠quieter.â
âBecause of what happened, dude.â
You blink. âWhat⊠What happened?â
Your brother looks at youâreally looks at you.Â
And suddenly, your gut flares in terror, storming in an instant across your abdomen.Â
âThat bitch pulled something on us.â
Your heart.Â
Itâs in freefall.
âWait⊠What?â You canât even form more than one syllable at a time, your legs turning gelatinous and knees starting to give out. âNo⊠What are youâŠ?â
What the fuck did he just say? That bitch pulled a what?Â
Your sibling slowly walks toward you once again, watching like heâs just waiting for you to say anything. Do anything.Â
But youâre a complete statue because all you can think about is the horror of something happening and the relief that nothing happened all at once.Â
Was Yoongi too scared to mention that part? Is this why he was holding back and shaking every time he reached out to touch you? Even this morning, he was soâŠÂ
Youâve never seen him like that. Is this why?Â
Your mind is swirling and crashing, overlapping each passing thought and scream running through your head. âIâm so sorry,â you hitch out, âI didnât know. Why didnât you say anything?â
âDidnât wanna scare you,â he sighs out. Putting both hands on his hips, your brother stops feet away, visibly still shook as he pierces wooden planks with his stare. âBut he pulled it right before Yoongi⊠and if it werenâtâŠFuck.âÂ
Burns flare and slice through your eyes when he has to pause. What is he trying to say? Pulled what?Â
Before Yoongi what?Â
Your brother continues, and your throat tightens. âIf it werenât for some random ass sirens, I⊠Things couldâve been so different.âÂ
What the fuck is happening. What the hell are you hearing?Â
âIt was probably dumb as fuck. But I was so fucking angry,â he grits out, watery eyes crushed looking your way. âSo fucking mad at how he was talking about you, I.. Walked right up to him and told him to fuck off.â
You canât even breathe.Â
âI still feel it,â he quietly adds, fingers pressed against his side. âRight here.âÂ
âFuck,â you finally choke out, eyes on fucking fire.Â
âBut all I knew was to keep you all safe,â he says, with hardened resolve and a wobbly chin. âAnd thatâs exactly what I did. I did that shit, even if that meantââÂ
Tears fling out of your eyes, flowing hot down your cheeks because you wouldnât want any of them to go out that way. Nothing happened nothing happened nothing happened and yet your body is acting as if something did and it hurts.Â
Your brother is there as soon as you crumple forward, letting you bury your head in his chest and sob your heart out. For him, for his friends, and for all the time you had with the man you love so, so dearly.Â
If anything happened to your brother before you came clean⊠If anything happened before you and Yoongi could evenâŠÂ
Suddenly, you feel equal weights of guilt. For running out on your brother. And for almost walking out on Yoongi.Â
You decide an apology is in order for both of them, and all the understanding in the world for Yoongiâs frosted demeanor as soon as you get him alone again.
And you are one hundred percent going to tell your brother everything once heâs back.Â
The tears cannot stop, and youâre sure you are crying unimpeded in a pressed and primmed suit. âIâm so sorry,â you keep repenting like a prayer. âThis is all my fault.â
âNoââ
âYou almostââ
âHey, stop.â He yanks you back, both of your faces soaked with saltwater. âWhat did I say before? I threw the first swing. You didnât do anything wrong.â
âBut it led to all this, I just.. I just feel so fucking stupid.â
âDonât. Hey, look at me.â Firm but gentle, he holds you at armâs length, forcing you to face him. âMaybe weâre both stupid, but you werenât the idiot. I was.âÂ
You feel so many conflicting things in your soul.Â
What would you have done if Yoongi was in critical condition? What would you have done differently if your brother was instead? Are they the same? Are the two situations really so different anymore?Â
No they arenât they arenât they arenât.Â
âPlease donât do that again,â you shake out. âEven if it was for me, if I ever lost you, I...âÂ
âYou know I canât promise anything.â He furrows his brows when you eye him with anger and sadness. âBut nothing like that is happening again. Especially with the same dudes.âÂ
âOkay.âÂ
A vicious tornado of emotions sends your whole body into agonizing pain. This isnât what you expected at all, and itâs causing your limbs to lock at the bends. Too many scenarios are jangling about yet you canât ask for specifics because that will just make it even more real.Â
A nightmare is somehow better once you know it ends with you waking up. âIâm⊠gonna need some time to process everything.â
âI know. And I wasnât planning on saying anything, but⊠You deserve to know the things I get into.âÂ
Ah.Â
The irony is not lost on you.Â
âAt least, if they involve you. We learned our lesson. You were right to tell us off.â
God. You feel numb.Â
âThanks,â you murmur, suddenly immensely tired. âI think I need more sleep.â
A blaring honk sounds outside the house, and you both flinch at the noise.Â
And your throat burns at the way your brother instinctively swept you behind his back.Â
When you realize what it is, you know what has to come next.Â
And heâs the first to react as he turns to face you again, âAlright. Iâm heading out, just remember to go get my baby when sheâs fixed, yeah?â
âDo you have to go?â
Wait.
The question seems to startle him as much as it does you.Â
How did you blurt it right out before even registering the words? Why does your heart clench at the sight of those eyes looking so pained?Â
Why does everything feel so shaky within these walls that were always your home?
âI do,â he says, voice tight. âIâm sorry.âÂ
And why the fuck do you feel sad heâs leaving?
âNo, no, itâs.. Of course you have to.â You canât help the lump in your throat from bobbing, the regret in your limbs as they barely move at your side. âI dunno why I asked, I guess I just..âÂ
Thereâs no response to your sniffle.Â
âSorry for yelling,â you squeak out. âI just feel really queasy.â
For a lot more reasons than one.
âWe all made it out,â your brother whispers. âThatâs what matters.â
âWill you⊠Will you at least try to be back for the party?â
The man swallows with his brows knit tight, then attempts to crack the tiniest smile. âYou know I will. Thatâs my guy.âÂ
âOkay.â You nod, sniffling again. After what he just told you? You know heâll do anything for the ones he loves. âSee you there.â
Your brother rubs a comforting palm over your head before turning, heading for the door and grabbing his leather duffle.Â
When he stops to glance at you one more time, you give a little wave of your hand before watching the door click shut.Â
Chest caving as you collapse to the ground in tears.Â
â
â
The need to call Yoongi burns so harshly your fingers damn near set your top aflame.
But heâs at work, and you canât fuck things up right when youâre approaching the finish line. You almost did with your brother, and that gave you twelve heart attacks in the span of minutes.Â
Still. Your chest aches so much that a thirteenth could very well be approaching. You donât even realize youâre bracing the hallway wall for support until you try to stand, back sore and aching from bending so far for so long.Â
What did your brother mean to say about Yoongi? What did that coward pull on them? Do you even want to know what happened?Â
Fighting back tears, you reach down for your phone, shakily typing out a message only to erase it. Then again. And again.Â
And again.Â
Giving up, you forcefully swallow all your worries, cringing at the bitterness of the unknown and the burnt molasses of hidden truths.Â
Itâs going to be okay. No matter what you think or imagine in your head, they made it out, they made it out, they are all alive.Â
Thatâs the only reason you can move forward, each step getting you from your room. To your bathroom.Â
And back again.Â
â
â
After showering, you feel lighter and refreshed, though the soreness between your legs has yet to leave.Â
But you wouldnât want it any other way, as itâs another reminder of Yoongiâs apparent brush with survival. His broken living room spurned the creation of your bond, your devotion to him as he confessed before you gave him your utmost trust in his sheets.Â
The end is so close. As soon as this week is over, youâll rip the last bit of peel from your pair of tangerines, baring all truths to your brother and facing the consequences.Â
Finally ready, you head to your car, opening your text threads with a plan: start slow.Â
Start with something that can be interpreted neutrally if anyone saw it on his phone screen, especially if your headstrong ex is in the room.Â
You [12:31pm]: how are you feeling?
Yoongi [12:34pm]: 1 AttachmentÂ
You close your door with brows furrowed.Â
Yoongiâs at the hospital?Â
Thatâs not what you expected at all.Â
Your chest swells with relief knowing heâs there, but you also wanna make sure heâs feeling okay. Especially his mental state after whatever the fuck your brother just dropped on you before leaving.Â
Goddamn, thatâs going to gnaw at your brain until you find the right time and right amount of courage to ask about it. Because itâs very possible Yoongi wonât tell you.Â
Because itâs probably something he knows you wonât like.Â
Fuck.Â
You [12:34pm]: Loved an Attachment
You [12:34pm]: thank you for listeningđ€ still sore?
Yoongi [12:35pm]: Yeah, but not bad. Just there.
Wait. Heâs not at the studio. That means you canâ
Yoongi: Outgoing Call
âHey.â
âHey,â you slowly say as you pull out into the street. âIâm driving now so this is easier.â
âCourse. You going to Taeâs?â
âMaybe. Iâm going to Yuriâs first.â You swallow, realizing that you didnât tell him about what you let slip before driving over. âI.. Told her. About you.â
Thereâs a little bit of silence on the line, just some adjustments and muffled speaker sounds. âSorry, just writing this down. Whatâs wrong with that?â
You huff through your nose. Gotta be those patient forms that always take forever to fill out. âOh. Just more and more people knowing, is all.âÂ
âEveryoneâs gonna know eventually.âÂ
You hold back a small smile. Because heâs right. âYeah. Iâm just tired of this feeling.â
âLike youâre hiding something.â
Itâs your turn for silence. He doesnât know how accurately that was played out today. The only answer you can provide is a curt, âExactly.â
âSame.â
Wings beat around your heart again.Â
He wants this. Yoongi really, really wants this. And years ago, that outcome wouldnât have even crossed your mind as an option.Â
âThank you for going, baby.â
âThe guys made me.â
You hum. âWhich ones.â
After a pause, you hear a puff of amusement. âAll of them at some point today, actually.âÂ
All of them? Does that include your brother? Did they talk about the trip already?
Your laugh is bittersweet. âWell. Glad to know you can be forced by everyone else except me.â
âHey, I was already gonna go because of you!â Yoongi quietly retorts, and you giggle at the pout in his words. âJust wanted to get a headstart on work first.â
You were right. He really does wanna go all out for his musical endeavors.Â
Itâs extremely admirable, and wildly attractive, but it does come to a point. âAs much as I love your passion, old man, I wanna keep you upright.â
He laughs soft into the line, and you think you can listen to that specific sound on an infinite loop. âThatâs fair.âÂ
âHow long is it gonna take, you think?â
âDunno. But Iâll keep myself busy until Iâm out.â
Of course he will. You donât doubt he wonât waste any time. Didnât he bring journals in his backpack? You wouldnât be surprised if he wrote ten thousand songs before being called in. âJust call me if you need anything, please?â
âOf course, babe.â
âThank you,â you say with utmost sincerity. âIf only my brother would be less stubborn and get checked, too.â
âHeâll probably do it once he gets there.â
âDid you convince him?â
âNah. But once he knows I did, heâll do it.â
âFigures.â You scoff. âOkay, Iâm almost there. Let me know how it goes.â
âK. Bye, doll.â
You didnât ask him what went down. But itâs not the time nor place, and you have plenty of chances this week to figure out when that would beâif at all.Â
âTalk soon.âÂ
â
â
For a normally bustling household, Yuriâs house is quiet.Â
So itâs not shocking when you walk into the kitchen and see all your friends glance your way, slowly vacating their chairs with eyes never leaving your face. Even Reia is on high alert.Â
Did Yuri tell her? Did Yuri tell anyone else?Â
No. Sheâs a talker and loves spilling, but she promised. And when she promises something, you know you can trust her to keep it.Â
Itâs what pours emotion in your voice as you meekly greet, âHey, guysââ
A crushing hug closes your throat. Yuriâs the one that gets to you first, with Reia and Dominique waiting their turns to offer you healing, relieved embraces.Â
âWhat happened?âÂ
âScared us half to death.â
Dom puts you at armâs length to give a once over, noting your face rubbed raw and eyes still a little bloodshot. Thankfully, her pupils hold more concern than disappointment. âYou good?â
Your eyes wobble alongside your smile, and you think itâs enough proof. âMore than that,â you still decide to whisper, and your heart beats again at her reaction.Â
âThank god. I was ready to kick your ass if you werenât.â
Heading up to Yuriâs room, you all wait until the door is swung back before mounting her canopy bed, sitting in a tight circle as you divulge everything.Â
Well. Almost everything.Â
You tell them that Yoongi is the one youâve been seeing, how you went to check on him last night in a panic, and the terrifying reason why. When you mention the fight after the basketball game, all three of your friends erupt in questions, and you have to assure them everything turned out okay. Honestly, you also do this to assure yourself, too.Â
âSo⊠Your brotherâs just fine with all of this?â Reia asks, not noticing the tick of Domâs jaw.Â
âWell,â you start with a higher pitch, earning a pair of groans. âHe doesnât exactly know yetââ
âYup. Heâs gonna murder him.â
âYeah, should we say our condolences now or..â
âHow long has this been going on?â Reia fires off another question that digs into your chest. âWas he the one you were seeing the whole time?â
âYes,â you admit with a sigh. âI shouldâve told you guys from the beginning, but. The whole thing just felt so delicate. But! We just started making things official recently, so..âÂ
Dom turns your way. âOfficial how?â
Well. Here goes everything.Â
With a shaky breath, and lingering feelings from the time it happened, you reveal with watery eyes, âYoongi⊠Told me he loves me.â
Both Yuri and Reia react in yelps, Domâs gaze lowering as the girls reach to grab your hands.Â
Wait. Whatâs going on with her? Sheâs the one that knows the most, sheâs the one that covered for you all those months ago. She has to be the one that is the least surprised at all this.Â
Blinking, you note to confront her about it later. Right now, youâre too focused on trying not to cry as your friends tumble out questions and support,Â
âHe said it? Did you say it first or did he?âÂ
âHow did it happen! Oh, Iâm so happy for you, babeââÂ
âThankâthank you, Yuri,â you squeeze out as she hugs you close. âI couldnât believe it, but he just.. Said it. We werenât even doing anything, I was just.. Looking up what injuries he could have..âÂ
And he confessed in the most Yoongi fashion he could have.Â
Looking back, it shouldnât shock you at all. Heâs always found ways to sweep you off your proverbial feet, so why would a confession plucked from the heavens be any different?Â
She lets you go before wiping her eyes, Reia and even Dom now sporting watery pupils, too.Â
âAs much as Iâm upset at you for not telling us, Iâve never been so happy for you.â When Yuriâs features crease in another sob, you sniffle along with the rest. âItâs been so long since you⊠And you really.. Fuck.âÂ
You know what sheâs trying to say, and the realization has your throat constricting so tight.Â
Itâs been forever since youâve had something like this, someone like this. When you and Jungkook were together, you told him that you loved him before he broke it off.Â
Sure, you bought the rings together, but he never uttered those words until years after when it didnât even matter. And all your relationships after his were complete and utter bullshit, so you donât think you ever even heard those three words and knew them to be true.Â
Yoongi was the first to ever say them so sincerely.Â
And that fact makes your ducts burn and burn.Â
And when Yuri finally speaks, it breaks the dam holding your real deluge back,Â
âI canât think of anyone else that deserves to be loved more than you.âÂ
All at once, everything streams out as you hunch forward. The pain of everything youâve endured, the hopelessness of knowing youâd most likely end up alone, the excruciating prospect of a future that you never deemed bright, or peaceful, or comforting.Â
And to think that even this man couldâve been snatched away from you in a snap? Even more tears overlap with the ones youâre shedding, and you canât even reach out to hug all three beautiful, angelic souls surrounding you with tight arms and sobs because your limbs lock at all bends.Â
Itâs the exact release you need. All your friends supporting you, all the pent up anxiety of last night and today, the truth setting itself free in some capacityâall in the comfort of a plushie-laden bed you only doubted yourself in last time.Â
Everythingâs gonna be alright. It has to be. Youâre gonna fight for the ones you love, even if a war between them is inevitable.Â
It takes a few minutes of heavy silence for you all to separate, swiping and rubbing tears while letting out happy sniffles.Â
When you thank them for being understanding, they assure you itâs okay. And when you say youâre going to tell your brother soon, a force from the doorway has all of you leaping from lilac sheets,Â
âTell him what?âÂ
Jia stands firm with a laundry basket at her hip, and Yuri scoffs at her older sister for barging in. âA knock wouldâve been nice!âÂ
Fuck!Â
You canât tell Jia of all people. If you spill anything about Yoongi, sheâs one hundred percent going to tell your brother. Theyâre the same age, and run in pretty tight circles, so of course you are not going to risk it.Â
But you can tell her something else youâre going to tell your older sibling, so you fire out a half-truth,Â
âTell him not to pick any other fights that could get him killed.âÂ
Jiaâs eyes zoom to your wrecked face, and she drops the laundry with haste before asking, âWhat happened? When? Tell me now.âÂ
Huh. Maybe your brother has a type, if heâs still into Jia like he said before.Â
You feel a little spark in your chest as you let her know they all got in a scuffle after the basketball game, and another pang as she immediately abandons the room and clothes with a fierce declaration,Â
âIâm gonna kill them myself!âÂ
âDonât worry, I already hounded my brother!â You call out after her, sighing as Yuri shakes her head with a smile. âShe gets like that when sheâs really worried, huh.âÂ
âYeah..â Your friend leans to look around you, noticing the basket left alone on the ground. âAnd if sheâs super fired up, she drops everything and doesnât stop until itâs handled. Clearly.âÂ
Maybe both older siblings really are similar.Â
The firestorm of an interruption seemed to break the tension in the room, with all of you finally relaxing and catching up. When they ask you questions, you answer what you can.Â
And when you divulge information that has your ears burning, their squeals and yells give you whole new reasons to live.Â
â
â
After a very comforting lunch Yuriâs mom cooked, you head to the bathroom when your phone suddenly vibrates through your palm.
Huh? Thatâs weird. You expect the name on your screen to be Taehyung, not Yoongi.Â
Not that itâs a bad thing. Youâve been waiting to hear from him, so this is a pleasant surprise.Â
Closing the door to the guest bathroom, you gaze at the calming sage decor with a smile. âHi, how did itââ
âYouâre coming over later, right?â
Oh, shit. Is he okay?
âYes, baby,â you respond with a soothing lilt, ears perked and body on high alert.Â
Does he think you arenât anymore? You both decided on the plans earlier. Surely he knows youâd never just flake on him. âIâm coming back once youâre done with work, remember?â
Thereâs an uncomfortable pause on the line, which makes your boyfriendâs next question jab you so far in the lungs you canât breathe,
ââŠCan it be now?â
Shit.Â
Just like Jia earlier, you drop every plan you have to the wayside. Youâre sure that Taehyung will understand, and you already got through the biggest conversation you needed to with your friends.Â
âOf course,â you whoosh out. âLemme just say bye and Iâll go.âÂ
âTake your time.â A small shuffling interrupts. âItâll take me a bit to get back.âÂ
âOkay. See you there.âÂ
The strained urgency in his voice makes your hair stand on end, so you vacate the bathroom to inform the girls that you gotta goâbut not without a quick head tilt towards Dom, who follows you outside and into the afternoon sun. Â
â
â
You wait until youâre next to your car on the street, turning with a concerned expression and jittery nerves, âWhatâs up with you? Did I do something wrong?â
Turns out, you read Dominique correctly. Her jaw locks before loosening, and it reminds you of the time she confronted you about Yoongi before. God, how much has changed since then. That feels like ages and ages ago.Â
âItâs not about you,â your best friend clears the air and the tightness in your shoulders. âIâm just.. Glad he came around.â
âYoongi?â When Dom nods, you blink. âWait, what?â
âAt your house that night.. After he left your room, we hadâI dunno, a heart-to-heart.â She sighs, flicking braids over her shoulder. You note to compliment the beads she chose this time, because they remind you of summer and simpler times. âI mightâve pressured him a bit, and.. I think he wanted to tell me that he loved you. All the way back then.âÂ
Something in your heart stutters, and you can only repeat your last question, âWhat?â
âYeah. Something about needing to do something first,â she continues, holding your gaze with perfect brows furrowed in sunlight. âBut I could tell he was damn serious about whatever it was. And if he was willing to do it for you? I let it go.âÂ
Your mind whirls.Â
Yoongi was already in love with you back then? Is that why he needed to let you go? To deal with whatever he had to do?Â
One side of you breaks thinking he had to go through all that alone; the other side is screaming at his past self for not even giving you a choice. What did he go through? What did he have to do?
Now you really have to see him. Immediately.Â
âThank you, Dom,â you rush out while opening your door. âIâm just happy itâs over.â
âThe hell itâs not.â Shooting you a glare that heats the oncoming breeze, she reminds, âItâs not over until your brother knows. And based on everything thatâs happened? That conversation is not gonna go over well.âÂ
A dark, simmering boil starts in your stomach, and youâre already feeling queasy again. Tightening your door handle, you gulp hard. âI know.âÂ
âTrust me, Iâm happy for you both. I am.â Both hands find her hips as she levels a gaze that you really, really donât enjoy. âBut Iâm gonna be honest, I think this is gonna ruin their friendship for good.âÂ
Both of your lungs clamp shut.Â
âPlease donât say that,â you beg, âIâm gonna fight for all of us. I will.âÂ
âI donât doubt that, babe. Hey, uh uh, come here.â Reaching out, she gives you a tight hug just when you feel fragile again.Â
âListen to me. I donât doubt that,â she says into your shoulder. âIâm just here to be realistic. Just donât be shocked if thatâs how it goes. Weâll be here for you no matter what, too.âÂ
âOkay,â you say with a scrunched face into her scent. God, she always smells so good, and itâs almost enough to calm you down. Almost almost almost. âThank you. But Iâm not giving up.âÂ
âThatâs my girl.â She squeezes you one more time. âI love you.âÂ
With eyes searing over, you choke and grip her tighter. âI love you, too.âÂ
â
â
Yoongiâs door warms your back as you wait for him to show.Â
But thereâs a good chance it can just be your volcanic anxiety.Â
Ever since your arrival, youâve paced, youâve gnawed on your lips, youâve had to shake the nerves out of your hands.Â
And over and over, youâve strained your neck to look for your favorite cat, because you could sincerely use even a glimpse of her right now.Â
While she doesnât end up showing, Yoongi rounds the nearest corner minutes after your last desperate scan.Â
Fuck, heâs so handsome.Â
Even now, as he simply walks toward you with a backpack slung over his shoulder, you watch with undying yearning to feel those flowing bangs over his forehead. Youâd even settle for a single touch of his cheeks, one of them currently sporting a thin bandage.
But the closer Yoongi gets, the quicker your admiration morphs into concern. Thereâs a deep bend in his brows that you canât decipher, and his fist is balled pretty tight.Â
Seriously, what happened? He looks so troubled that you slowly push off the doorway to ask,Â
âBaby, whatâsââ
A bag hits the ground before youâre swooped into a kiss so electric your lips spark.Â
Him. Him, him, and more him. For the love of everything you donât understand whatâs happening but you kiss Yoongi back with everything you have, arms slinging around his strong shoulders and tugging him closer because he clearly needed this.Â
And fuck if you didnât need it just as much. Screw it if anyone sees you. This is all you want and youâll stay right here until he pulls away.Â
When he finally does, both of you swallow to catch your breaths, and your soul glimmers when his forehead meets yours.Â
âHi, baby,â you whisper to his exhales. âMissed you, too.â
Silent, your lover kisses your forehead before hugging you close, and youâre more sure of your prediction than ever. Something is bothering him.Â
He doesnât look worse, at least. But thereâs clearly something off and heâs not hiding it. His lack of words is loud enough.Â
âLetâs go inside,â you quietly suggest. âI wouldâve gone in already but I donât have a key.â
He nods, fishing out his keyring to let you both inside.Â
When you set your bags down and slip off your shoes, itâs only seconds before youâre softly pulled into a hug again, surprising yet so, so welcoming.Â
Even only after a few hours, youâve missed the fuck out of him. Which makes all of this an outright dream.Â
âSorry,â Yoongi finally murmurs against your shoulder. âI justâŠâ
âNothing to be sorry for.â You stroke a hand along his hair, massaging his scalp and loving how soft it feels. The windswept strands fall back into place as you keep running your fingers through. âDid you at least get your appointment?â
âYeah, I did.â He buries his face further. âNothing bad. Just canât lift anything heavy for a couple days.â
âGood. Thatâs easy to manage,â you whisper back into his tee, feeling the chill of lingering air conditioning and body warmth all at once. âIs something else bothering you?â
âNot exactly.â Whatever that means. âIâll tell you about it later. Just wanted this, and you.â
Oh. ThatâsâŠÂ
âIâm here now, love,â you assure with a melting heart, wondering what happened to cause this behavior.Â
Is it because of last night? Or something that happened today? Youâre anxious all over again, but from the way Yoongiâs acting, your worries are second to his. âHave you eaten yet?â
He shakes his head, only pulling you closer with not a word from his lips.Â
And from this point on, you make a silent vow to yourself. Whatever Yoongi needs, youâre going to take care of him.Â
No matter what, these next few days are all about himâa minuscule sacrifice in comparison to everything heâs done for you, whether you knew about it or not.
âIâll make you something then. Come on.âÂ
When you walk, you slip your hand down his arm to hold his hand, and your lead into his kitchen is short.Â
âAny requests?â You cheerfully ask as you spare a smile over your shoulder. âWe can do⊠Something lightâŠâ
Only to see him staring back with nothing but a lingering sense of longing.
Okay.Â
You need to get to the bottom of this now.Â
Stopping right over linoleum, you leave no room for arguments, âYoongi. Tell me whatâs wrong.â
He blinks before his gaze meets the floor. So youâre confused when he simply, quietly..Â
Laughs?Â
âItâs not that somethingâs wrong,â he slowly starts, a shy smile carving his features. âFor the first time in my life, nothingâs wrong.âÂ
Your heart beats extra loud.Â
âBut itâs too much to explain right now.â His eyes rise to meet yours. âJust know that Iâm so in love with you.âÂ
Oh.
âAnd I want you to know that every day I live.â
Fuck.
Your body responds before you can say anything, lips connecting to remove any need for speech. The knowledge of them all staring death in the face last night makes this confession sear your insides, and you canât help but kiss him like youâll never get to again.Â
Yanking him back, you spin on your heel until he flings into the kitchen, clutching your wrists before gripping your jaw with both hands.Â
His mouth heats on yours, his glasses the only barrier between your skin. Everything sizzles from your head to your toes, and you both bang into a countertop beforeâ
âFuck, ouch.â
âShit, you okay?â
Yoongi rubs his side with one eye pinched shut, a corner of his teeth present. âYeah. Worth it, though.â
âBe serious,â you reprimand. Looks like heâs gonna have to take it easy, which means no going at it like animals until heâs on the mend. âNo more until you feel better, yeah?â
âSays who?â
âBabe.â
His deadly pout almost breaks your resolve. âFine.âÂ
But you can wait. Youâre sure it wonât take long, and for this man? Youâll wait however long you need to.Â
Besides, thereâs plenty of things you can do in the meantime that donât require running into hard objects.Â
âGood. Now letâsâŠâ You turn away to get started before youâre held, and pulled back into yet another embrace.Â
What the hell is happening today? Your lungs and your melting pile of a brain can only take so much. Itâs beautifully overwhelming how Yoongi canât seem to let you go, because youâre the one that always loses control.Â
This whole time, itâs been you that canât hold yourself back.Â
So now? Being on the other side? You donât think you ever want him to restrain himself again.Â
This time, he moves slow. Sensuously slow, and it would occur to you that heâs finding a very cheeky loophole to your plan if you werenât so hazy-eyed.Â
Whatever Yoongiâs doing, you wonât stop him.Â
Your back touches a counter before Yoongi cages you in, and your lips mold together as perfectly as his body does with yours. Your unhurried strokes match his, and your minds communicate without a single word.Â
Thereâs yearning still ever present. But thereâs comfort in abundance, and a whole new level of need.Â
After he pulls away, you can visibly see him drink you in from head to toe.Â
âYou know.. Iâm good holding off on all the other shit.â Pulling you in, his lips curve as he confidently declares, âBut Iâm never gonna stop kissing you.âÂ
His hands, his lips, his words. They all have healing powers, youâre so sure of it. If Yoongi hasnât yet realized his unending pain has blossomed into a safe haven, you need to let him know no matter what,Â
âGood.â
Thereâs still a pining in his eyes, but he lets you free, hand skirting your hip before he walks to his room. âGonna change then Iâll help.âÂ
âYou donât have to, baby,â you say as you struggle to catch your breath. âI got it.âÂ
Three minutes later, heâs chopping an onion anyway.Â
But youâre loving how serene everything feels with the two of you prepping and dicing, thumps of knives on wood intertwining in sound before you laugh at his crying over the pesky vegetable. Maybe if he wore contacts instead of specs, heâd be better off.Â
Not that his choice of eyewear is what youâre complaining about. But those glasses paired with the cream tees heâs been wearing? There will be hell to pay as soon as you get a chance at revenge.Â
Your pot is set to boil for a bit, so you finally rest against the counter and start a timer on his microwave. âGo ahead,â you gesture to your very handsome cooking partner. âYou can sit now.â
âHuh? Weâre not done yet.â
âOh.â Blinking, you tilt your head in confusion because you couldâve sworn you heard him yawn a couple times. âYou arenât tired?â
âI am,â he says before squeezing his eyes, rapid blinks to follow. âBut Iâm fine here.â
You toss and turn the food around, sprinkling a little more seasoning and hearing the bubbles and fizzes. When you stir a little more, a sudden thought occurs, halting your movements and spinning you around,Â
âAre you staying there to watch my ass.â
Yoongiâs slow smile gives everything away, but he also makes up for the blatant staring.Â
âCanât deny thatâs one of the things.â Pushing off the sink, he stands right next to you, slotting a hand behind your neck and angling you for a kiss. âBut I meant it earlier. I justâŠâ
Youâre completely silent as you watch him slide his eyes from your face to the sizzling food. Whatever heâs thinking about, youâre gonna give him all the room to talk.Â
âJust like being where you are.âÂ
How you went from almost running out of his door to here, you arenât quite sure. But youâre grateful for that split second of him deciding to fight for the two of you instead of against, because you really were going to leave.Â
And you may have taken much, much longer to even try going back.Â
Your voice is barely heard over the aromatic smell and fizzle, âGood thing I like having you around.â When he smiles again, you let out a breath of a giggle, going back to shuffling the pan around and tilting your head to the fridge. âI put some fruit in there if you wanna eat that, too.â
âIâm down.â
âK.â
Your food is ready soon enough, and the two of you eat while talking about easy topics. Like work and your workplace dynamics, what Yoongiâs team has been working on at the studio.Â
At one point, your curiosity about the album release party grows from something he says. âSpeaking of. The partyâs on Friday, right?â
âYeah.â
âOkay, I thought so,â you deflate, setting your bowl down on the table. âSorry he canât go.â
âHuh?â
Your body stills. âWait. Did he not say anything? About his trip being extended?â
So much for nothing in his life being wrong. From the lost look on his face, you may have given him another reason to fold back in on himself. âNo.. No, he didnât.â
Both of you sit in silence.Â
This could be nothing. Right? That means your brother is confident he can make it so thereâs no point in telling Yoongi heâs gonna miss it. Or maybe heâs not trying hard enough and then not being able to say it to his face?Â
âIâm sorry,â you apologize. âI thought he told you.â
âItâs okay.â Clearly itâs not. âNot much to do about it now.â
âYoongi⊠What if he knows?â At your own question, you stiffen, curling into a proverbial ball. Fear and the sick backfire of fibbing has your mouth going drier than desert air. âWhat if he actually knows?â
Setting down his chopsticks, Yoongi looks your way, eyes unreadable behind his specs. âIf he did, do you think heâd leave us alone?â
Heâs got a point. âGuess not.âÂ
âMm.â Flicking his eyes to the window, he adjusts uncomfortably in his chair. âAnd I dunno if I mentioned this, but.. He thinks I got back with my ex.â
âFuck, really?âÂ
âThatâs the real reason why he hasnât been talking to me. Maybe he thinks sheâs gonna be there on Friday.â
âOh.â Your shoulders sag, and sag. Not owning up to your relationship is one thing; Yoongi having to dwell in his previous relationship is another. âIs that⊠worse?â
âShit.â Reaching across wood, you close your hand around his fingers for support. Itâs the only thing you can think to do. At least, itâs what you would want if you were in his shoes. âI think you should tell him she wonât be.â
A million seconds later, Yoongi thankfully agrees. âYeah, I will.â
You feel better. Somewhat. At least a little less nauseous about the possibility of your brother knowing.Â
But it still sucks knowing that heâs actively avoiding Yoongi because of an ex he used to have.Â
How bad was it back then if this is the case? What exactly happened? Is this why Yoongi went radio silent on you for weeks?
It seems like he doesnât even wanna talk about her. So you wonât pry just yet, as much as you wanna know every single thing sheâs done wrong so you can hound her through every timeline in existence.Â
Instead, you talk about a much better subject,Â
âWe should feed my cat now.â
And you quickly laugh at the saucy glint in Yoongiâs eyes.Â
â
â
Everything is set where it needs to be. Sugarâs food and water fill their respective bowls, your shoulder leans into Yoongiâs good side, and his arm rests around your back as heâs propped up by his banged up doorway.Â
You remember the first time you saw him lean against the wood like this. Only that time, you were a shell of a girl, waiting with shaky breaths and shaken confidence to hear his response to your inappropriate request.Â
Who wouldâve thought that youâd be on the same side as him all these months later? In his arms, resting a head on his warm chest?Â
When you let out a short chuckle, Yoongi turns to your smile. âHmm?âÂ
âNothing,â you wisp out. âJust thinking about us.âÂ
His fingers press into your side a fraction more, and you can feel him lift his head again. âMe, too.âÂ
Umm.Â
You can say things like that. He isnât allowed!Â
Youâre about to set some one-sided rules before your gift pops out of the bushes a few feet away.Â
âMy baby!â you quietly call, leaving Yoongiâs side to crouch down. âCome here, love. You hungry?â
She cautiously makes her way over, sniffing your hand when you leave it outstretched. After careful consideration, the little one nudges your palm, letting you glide fingers down her back as she approaches her bowls.Â
âYouâre so tiny,â you observe with slight pity. âWeâll get you well fed in no timeââ
âHey, Sugar! Oh, is this her? Sheâs gorgeous, no wonder!â
Huh? Sugar?Â
Who else knows the catâs name already?
Your neck almost strains when you look up to see whoâs talking. When you notice an older lady donning a really comfy, fluffy robe, you feel like it looks super familiar before you stand.Â
âHi,â you greet before introducing yourself, extending your hand and shaking the womanâs soft, delicate fingers. âSorry if we were too loud.â
âCall me Miss Dion. And you werenât too loud this time, sweetie,â she says with a wink, glancing down at the kitty eating what you laid out. âWas just cominâ out to water my plants so itâs good to see youâre here, too. Looks like he finally got some sense back in that head of his.â
âIâm standing right here, you know.â
âOh, I know!â
Back? How long has she known about you? Do her and Yoongi actually converse regularly? Their banter is⊠Really adorable.Â
Itâs making you fall even more in love with the man biting his cheek in amusement.Â
Wait.Â
Is Yoongi Sugar?Â
That is so fucking cute you could cry.Â
âIâm back to take care of this guy,â you explain with a head tilt. âAnd the little one, of course.âÂ
Itâs when you say this that Miss Dion notices the bandages on Yoongiâs face, concern pushing down her brows. âWhat happened to you, young man?â
âNothing to worry about.âÂ
âYou sure? I got some ointment in my kitchen somewhereââ
âItâs all goodââ
âWeâll take it,â you cut him off, not looking but feeling his stare on your face. âHow much do we owe you?âÂ
âOh, donât you worry about that.â With a snuff at Yoongi and a smile your way, Miss Dion heads inside to fetch a bottle.
In the meantime, you give your lover a quiet stare before bending down to run your hands over soft fur.Â
âPapa Sugar is gonna need that so he canât argue,â you coo to your cat, cheekily ignoring Yoongiâs sputtering puff of air above your head.
âPapa Sugar? Really?â
You glance up to his smile with a mischievous one of your own. âWhat, you wanna be Sugar Daddy instead?â
The swirl in your belly is instant. Because Yoongi can only look out into the distance, biting his lip and failing to hide his grin.
Sigh. If only he didnât have those injuries across his face. Youâd push him back into the door and slam it shut if it was any other day.Â
Patience, patience, patience.Â
Those hits arenât gonna heal with just one round of gauze.Â
When you have to replace the cotton patches, at least youâll have something to help.Â
â
â
Itâs not until youâre about to tuck in for the night that Yoongi approaches your side of the bed. Judging by the headphones slung around his neck, heâs about to work, so you assume heâs just coming to give you a kiss goodnight.Â
But after he does exactly that, he asks you a question that warms your chest,Â
âWhereâs your keys.âÂ
âIn there,â you motion to the nearest wall, bag propped right under his windowsill. âInside pocket, I think.âÂ
Yoongi bends with a prolonged grunt, slowly rummaging until he finds your jangling keyring with its charms. When he grabs it, he silently sits on the edge up against your stomach, body heat permeating your tee while he fiddles with the clasps.Â
God, youâre so in trouble. You know exactly what heâs doing.Â
Unlike the last time he offered you complete access to his place, this time he didnât even hesitate. And the way he secures a key amongst the loop, itâs his silent way of cementing permanence.Â
Thatâs not another key for you to borrow.
Because that key is yours.
â
â
continued in angel, pt. 2
pitstop inbox before pt2!! | join the server!
a/n: holy crap we're doing it we are actually back in the main storyline?! how do we feel right now because i am over the damn moon diving into this story again. here's a slight pitstop before you make your way over to part two (THE CONTINUATION IS IN A REBLOG!) so take a breather before heading into the resttttttt
++ feedback box:
â„ of course, any reblogs/comments/messages are appreciated!
â„ for the ones that are too shy to reblog with a review, comment on this, or send a message, i went ahead and made another anonymous form where you can send in what you think!
â„ no emails collected, no need to put in a username. itâs literally just a comment dropbox :D feedback can be as short/sweet or as long as youâd like!
â„ here!
++ more links:
â„ masterlistÂ
â„ three tangerines masterlist
a/n 2: we did this for 3tanfugue and the energy was great! just like last time, some of you guys suggested that we have post goals to encourage interaction. no one voted against it yet, so we'll keep it goin!
note goal: since we're back in main storyline, upping the goal! 1,000 notes is the goal, so when we hit that, 3tan14 will be dropped as soon as it's done! thank you all for reading and would love to hear any thoughts: what did you like about the chapter? how did a certain scene make you feel? what are you excited to see next? any shares, comments, tags, and reblogs with commentary count, and i appreciate anything you guys have to say.
explicit warnings: cursing, thigh riding, cowgirl, oral (m rec), naughty studio time(??), couch sex, rough sex, giving yoongi the business, bold as fuck reader, choking, spanking, penetrative sex, kissing deserves to be here too lol, alexa play no hands by waka flocka, deep throating, hair/head tugging, nipple play, yoongi in that gd tank, yoongi in those gd glasses, teasing, titty fucking hello!!!!, stripping while he watchesâŠ. yeah, missionary, sub!3tanyoongi?????, scratching, multiple orgasms, protected sex, emotional sex, the glasses.. stay on??, good god theyâre so hot iâm blushing
â
â
Itâs morning when Jimin gets a call.Â
Shifting in sheets that arenât his, he sleepily blinks once before eyeing the blue light with a squint, wondering who dares wake him up before his natural rise. What time even is it anyway? Itâs gotta be an ungodly hour if his circadian rhythm is disturbed.Â
Still, he grabs his cell from the nightstand, flinching at the movement behind him and inwardly slinging out curses.Â
Because waking him up is one thing.Â
But if anyone disturbs Taehyung heâs gonna give them hellâ
Min Yoongi: Incoming Call
Shit.
Jimin yanks the covers off, rushing out of bed and snapping Tae awake anyway. For what? Donât fucking know, but theyâre ready. Wherever. Whatever. They already stayed up clutching their phones until they physically couldnât keep their eyes open.Â
Because as much as Yoongi assured him nothing would happen, Jimin still couldnât let go of his car keys.
Answering slow, he feels his chest winding and winding, eyes locked with Taehyung while they both wait on edge, ââŠYoongi?â
âYeah.â
Thank the fucking stars.Â
Yoongiâs okay. Heâs on the line. He made it to morning or whatever fucking time it is, and heâs doing exactly what he said he would.
And itâs enough, enough, enough.
Burns zing up the corners of Jiminâs eyes, and he swipes hard as Taehyung moves, likely to hear whatâs happening and even more likely to just be by his side.Â
Jimin is grateful for either one. But he tries to keep composure as he croaks, âYou better have woken me up for a reason.â
The slight hum on the line induces a wobbly smile. âYou slept?â
âFuck you,â Jimin shakily laughs, wiping liquid relief from an eye before Taehyungâs thumb brushes tenderly over the other. His gaze is thankful while continuing, âWe did but not much.â
âSorry.â
âItâs okay.â Sniffling, Jimin walks to Taeâs door, letting him into the hallway first and finally drinking in the sight of his ass in those sweats. Because he can finally function like a normal, smitten loser again. âWeâll come over so we canââ
âNo need.â
âWhat?â Nope. Back to panic mode. And judging from his boyfriendâs posture, Taehyung has backpedaled into that, too. âWhat do you mean no need?â
Thereâs a slight pause on the line, and small noises make their way through the speaker. It sounds like bedsheets, but it also sounds likeâŠÂ
âSheâs still sleeping.â
Oh.
Oh, shit.
A tidal wave of relief crashes into Jiminâs ducts as he hangs his head, palming his face caught in a heavy tide of emotion. When he turns, Taehyung fairs no better, his eyes red and fingers wiping at a perfect, perfect cheek. One of them sniffles, but Jimin canât tell if itâs him or not, because his vision is blurry and his heart is beating, beating, beating again.Â
Whether you know it or not, whatever you did last night may have just changed Yoongiâs entire life.
Because Jimin knows this man through and through. Years of picking up his habits and tells didnât amount to nothing. Itâs how he was able to sense exactly when to intervene, and how he knew exactly what that hauntingly hollow tone in Yoongiâs voice meant when he busted in that day.Â
The tone he hears now? The man that just spoke on the line?Â
That is a Min Yoongi so in love he canât even hide it over the phone.Â
Fuck.Â
Gathering himself, Jimin squeaks out, âI⊠Iâm glad youâŠâ What the fuck does he say? Every thought jams in his throat so hard he has to hand the phone off.
Thankfully, Taehyung perfectly continues his thoughts, voice scratching rocks under a waking river, âWeâre glad youâre both safe.â
âMm.â
âSo whenâs the wedding?â
Jimin huffs through a fresh batch of tears, clearing his face before grinning at Tae very seriously awaiting an answer. Honestly, at this point? Itâs not far-fetched. Jiminâs seeing your future clearer than his present, and maybe he will be a fun uncle sooner than he thinks.
If only Yoongi would just get the fucking talk with your brother over with.Â
But Jimin understands the hesitation. If he were in that same position, thereâs no telling when he would be courageous enough to stand up to the guy. Thereâs a reason heâs quick to command a room, and his lifelong mission to protect his younger sister made him grow up a lot faster than everyone else.Â
Still⊠Yoongi just deserves to be happy. And youâre the very obvious answer to helping with that.Â
As much as he may have wanted some chances of his own, Jimin is grateful you found your way into his best friendâs heart. Not just anyone is invited inside, and even less people can truly be allowed to stay.Â
And youâre probably the only one that has permanent residence.Â
âYou guys should get some sleep.â
Taehyung pouts right on cue, and Jimin canât fight those sleepy, droopy eyes. âYou didnât answer me.â
Cute as fuck! He must be stopped. Taking the phone, Jimin speaks into the line fully recovered, shooting his cheeky partner a teasing glare, âWe will if you get some, too.â
âCanât.â
âWhy not?â
âGot some things to do at the studioââ
âNo!â They reject together, both equally as appalled because what the fuck kinda answer is that?Â
âAfter what happened last night? Are you crazy?â
âWhat happened to spending time with her? Men!âÂ
âHeâs going on a business trip, I canât lose to him.â
âSo what?â Tae asks before they both share an even further confused look. Yoongi may be a lovesick fool but that doesnât give him an excuse to be a dumbass! âYouâre just gonna leave her alone?â
Thereâs a sigh on the line before Jimin plants a hand on his hip. âNot just that. You gotta rest, too, bro. If she doesnât tell you to take it easy or at least get checkedâwhich she willâweâre going over there to annoy you.âÂ
âYou serious?â
âYes, Iâm serious.â Jimin cocks his head and leans closer to the phone. âAt least rest easy for the next couple days. Especially if you have all this time to see each other.â
The timing couldnât be more perfect. Your brother is leaving for his trip and Yoongi caught some unfortunate hits to his ribs. The dude basically has a free pass to spend the whole week with you, and heâs not even taking full advantage of it? Oh, the things Jimin has to say about the thin line of work ethic and relationship effort.Â
âIâll think about it.â
âThink about it for a long time,â Taehyung cuts in before Jimin can pop off, walking away into the living room.Â
Itâs fine. Let him figure out that you arenât a woman he can just leave. Frankly? That would tickle Jimin to no end to see Yoongi folding his plans so fast just to be with you.Â
But he spares him the tirade only because youâre fast asleep right next to him. âThank you for calling, man.â
âSaid I would.â
âI know.âÂ
Because above all else, Jimin is happy to hear that voice. Even if itâs obvious heâs a little banged up from last night, itâs still Yoongi. In one piece. Thatâs all Jimin wanted, and he canât thank you enough,
âDonât overwork yourself, and stay with her as long as you can.â
Thereâs a small laugh on the other end. âI plan on it, Chim.â
And Jimin catches on to why. âIâm holding you to that then.âÂ
â
â
Dawn breaks through open blinds, stretching its orange tint across a clean, spotless table.Â
You donât know what got you up so early. But when you peer into the kitchen, you tell yourself you woke up right on time.Â
Because seeing Yoongi when youâre wide awake is better than any dream youâll ever have.
Not because of his appearance, even though the sight of him sends a pang through your chest. No. Itâs the way heâs quietly prepping a morning meal, using the arm on his better side thatâs not sporting a nasty hit to the ribs, without you even asking.Â
Bits of sunlight dance right out of your eyes.
The effort. The consideration. This man shouldnât be lifting a finger, yet here he is cooking before you even left his bed. Isnât this the same man that got caught up in a fight hours ago? Isnât this the same man you almost walked out on with a frozen heart?Â
Yes. But heâs also the same man that loves you. And you still canât grasp that concept in any of the fingers playing with his tee you borrowed.
âHi,â you whisper, telling him a thousand things.Â
To which he regards before smiling soft, voice travelling over linoleum and circling around your heart, âMorning, doll.â
Damn. You hear it. Yoongiâs sore as hell.Â
But instead of getting into that right away, you silently take residence by his side. Because this moment feels too delicate, and you admire his willingness to take care of you unprompted. You didnât even know youâd eat before going back home.Â
With a hand warming his back, you wait until Yoongiâs done tossing food on the stove to peck his morning-chilled cheek. âThank you for cooking,â you murmur, admiring those beautiful brown eyes. âSleep okay?â
âCus of you,â your lover softly responds, eyeing your lips before gliding back up to your gaze. âYou?â
Ugh. Heâs gotta know those glasses are so unfair. Theyâve gotten you repeatedly before, and theyâre certainly getting you now.Â
But you canât help but deflate at the cuts behind those rims, while knowing there are even more bruises hiding underneath his oversized tee. How is Yoongi cooking right now? How is he even awake? âSame.âÂ
âGood.âÂ
These instant, deep shivers at his deeper morning voice will never, ever go away. But anything you wanna do about them isnât important right now. Right now, you need to make sure Yoongi is either okay, or finds a way to get better.Â
Sliding your hands down the slopes of his chest, you delicately rest one on his ribs. âDoes it still hurt?âÂ
Yikes. That wince is enough. But Yoongi doesnât shy away from your touch, and you appreciate the way he stays honest. âItâs sore. But I should be good.â
âYou gonna get it checked?â
Thereâs a slight upward tilt of his lips. âNot right now.â At least the honesty persists, as much as you donât want him following the typical manly response to hospital visits. âBut I will if you want me to.â
âPlease go,â you gently urge, lest you disturb the soft morning dew before it melts with the sunrise. âFor me?â
Only sizzles from the stove fill the space until Yoongi nods, and his voice is just as low and tender, âIâll go after work.â
Oh. âYouâre working today?â
Just like breakfast, you didnât expect this, either. Frankly, you figured neither of you were gonna even think about work, much less go. Sure, heâs due a hospital visit and you owe some friends immediate explanations for your absence. But other than that, shouldnât Yoongi be resting?Â
Does his craft truly mean that much?Â
Well, shit. You gotta respect his work ethic, thatâs for damn sure. Because you would sequester yourself to your bedroom and have endless dates with your television if you were sporting a good jab or two. This music thing must mean more to Yoongi than you previously thought. And who are you to step on that dream?Â
Suddenly, all thoughts and concerns flee from the kiss on your cheek.Â
âIâll stay if you stay,â he says, turning to move the pan and scrunching his face with a grunt. Fuck.Â
âIâŠâ Shit, you were gonna go back to the house anyway. And from Yoongiâs smartass smirk, you can tell he already knew that. âJust need to check on him, too. And he doesnât have a car right now, so. I should at least give him a ride.âÂ
âFigured.â In a move so domestic your head spins, Yoongi turns your body and gently pats your butt. âNow go sit. Letâs eat and figure this out.âÂ
â
â
As you devour a flawless meal and clean your dishes, you plan out the day. Youâll head home and check on your brother while Yoongi heads to the studio, and then youâll rendezvous with your friends to hang out until heâs done with work. Theyâre already lighting up your phone like no oneâs businessâespecially Yuri.Â
Yoongi flicks the sink off before you both head to his bedroom, and you melt at the way he slowly wraps his arms around your front halfway there, all four of your legs slowing to close the rest of the distance.Â
Whatâs he doing? This is joyfully new, but you have a pretty tight deadline. Warming his forearm and your own cheeks, you chuckle out, âWe have to hustle, old man.âÂ
âYou hustle me all the time,â he accuses into your shoulder blade, kissing its ridge and making you reconsider walking out the door entirely. âLemme have this.âÂ
Your second laugh is more subdued, and youâre right between his bed and desk when you lift both hands to hold him close. âYou have everything I got,â you wisp into his skin, planting your lips once, twice before you feel his arms press further in. âSo this is nothing.âÂ
Seconds and silence slide by, the delicate veil of early morning still hovering around the room. When Yoongi doesnât say anything, you make to turn and face him.Â
But youâre stopped before your heart skips.Â
âI could stay like this all day,â he admits, voice so low it rumbles through your bones. âAnd itâd be perfect.âÂ
âWhat, you donât wanna see my face?â You joke with a giggle. âRude, but thatâs fine.âÂ
Yoongi only buries his nose further, his glasses sliding against your skin peeking from his shirt. âIâm much braver right here, doll.âÂ
Oh.Â
The leap your heart does is more of a dive, plummeting into the seafoam swirling around your feet. All the words you want to respond with jump off right after, leaving you with nothing but the clouds in your eyes.Â
You donât quite know what he means by that. But it feels like those six words hold the weight of a thousand, so you simply let another kiss on his smooth forearm linger. âDo you want me to go with you?âÂ
A puff of laughter warms you right through and, despite his earlier admission, Yoongi does slowly spin you around.Â
And when you follow, you realize youâre much braver when you arenât facing him, too.Â
âItâs not that, babe,â he says through a dashing curve. âBut the offer was cute.âÂ
âI take it back then.âÂ
âDamn!âÂ
Both of your laughs whoosh out and collide, sweeping as Yoongi pinches your side and you flinch towards the bed. âYou fuckerâ!â
Before you know it, your back hits a comforter before a weight presses your stomach, emotions clashing as youâre elated and shy and immediately concerned for your boyfriendâs side. âBaby, be carefulââ
Lips capture yours, sucking up your warning before a hand slides under your head. Sighing, you arch into his chest, feeling the weight of his chains slip across your breasts.Â
Euphoria isnât an adequate enough word to describe how you feel. Where there used to be flutters in your ribcage now reside strong, powerful wing beats, gusts of want and desire lifting you off the ground and launching you into clear skies. Starlight of every color exists within each kiss you share, and your fingers feebly grab his tee to keep you from falling back down to earth.Â
âIf we donât go now,â Yoongi rasps before sliding his mouth against yours, âWeâre never going anywhere again.âÂ
âI know,â you whisper, willingly letting him kiss you once more, âIs that a promise?âÂ
âFuck, I wish.âÂ
You do, too. But you know youâre running out of time for what you need to do. And werenât you just saying you had to respect his aspirations? Shit, you really do need to snap out of it. âCome on,â you order with a pat to his chest. âWe have all week to do this. We got time.âÂ
Turns out, youâre still amongst the heavens. The way Yoongiâs looking at you? This is the closest youâll ever get to being held by an angel.Â
Did he get more handsome overnight? Or is it the light in his eyes sustained since his confession in the kitchen? You donât quite know, and you may never pinpoint why, but the tug he has on your heart spans space and time.Â
And youâll run through both forever to keep meeting him again and again.Â
Burns prick your eyes, but he mercifully stands before he can catch any evidence of your yearning.Â
Just like that, the two of you bounce back to getting ready, with him sliding notebooks and headphones in a backpack while you change into your own clothes. As you sling your bag over a shoulder, he reaches for the closest hoodie, and you wordlessly make your way to the front door.Â
You really do hope he gets looked at today. But just like the calm after a storm, you want to encourage him gently rather than shove him out. At least he seems receptive to your gentle suggestions.
But after you ask one more time and he simply nods, you lower your eyes to his kicks. âSorry if Iâm nagging. Iâd just worry less if you went right away, thatâs all.â
âYou arenât nagging, babe.â Your freshly bloomed lover reaches out to hold your wrist, smoothing a rough thumb over your skin. Fucking hell, you canât help but frown at the gashes and cuts marring his knuckles. âIâll go as soon as I can.â
Not just his hands, but his face. His ribs. And maybe other places you havenât even seen yet.Â
You donât wanna leave his side.Â
But you have to head out before your brother leaves. Things need to get patched up before he flies out into more stress, and you owe him an apology for walking out when he was still aching. Based on Yoongiâs physical state? Your brother could be hiding some big wounds and you didnât even wanna talk to him.Â
However. Was last night necessary? Absolutely. You cannot entertain the possible outcomes had you not tried hard enough to get through Yoongiâs door. His eyes were so dulled, his hands felt so cold. What would have happened if you didnât force yourself inside?Â
Why was that guitar smashed to pieces?Â
This is also why you refuse to leave. So many questions, so many things you still donât know. Like what all happened when you were separated? And how in the hell is this man in love with you?
âI donât wanna go,â you confess, instantly encased in his arms and warmth. âIâd much rather keep kissing you.âÂ
âTrue,â he says with a resigned huff, shifting his glasses with an adorable nose scrunch. If only he didnât have so many little red lines of conflict on his face. âBut we both have stuff to take care of, so letâs get all that done first.â
âUgh, fine.â Your groan is more teasing than serious, and Yoongiâs laugh is nothing but understanding.Â
Damn. You still feel it. You really donât wanna go. Be it the rawness of last night still on your skin, or the confessions still on your tongues, you just wanna stay by his side. âSorry,â you breathe out, lacing your fingers to pepper love along his strong, reddened ridges. âIâm serious. I donât wanna leave you right now.â
Walking out of Yoongiâs door just doesnât feel right. Even if heâs right there and will be following you out. Is this feeling normal? Are you supposed to feel this tightly woven to someone? Because the stitching between your hearts has only gotten stronger in the tempest of last night, as if you bonded together just to hold on for dear life.Â
Maybe thatâs exactly what happened. And itâs exactly why you can barely take one step out of his place.Â
âThen donât.â
Not one second passes before your chin is held, and lips slide so tenderly across yours that they may as well melt into your touch. Your reaction is quickly swooped into his mouth, and everything falls away as you let him seize your every thought. Lightning from last night zips out of your limbs, your toes, your fingers clasping his loose tee.Â
You might just cry where you stand.
How have his kisses gotten even better? How have you never felt this way even though youâve done this far more times than you were ever supposed to? It should be impossible, and yet, this man finds even more ways to astound you.Â
Yoongi slips a hand over your cheek, giving one more beautiful push of his lips as he confesses, âI donât wanna leave you, either.âÂ
And your breath stutters onto his features. âYou, too?â
Slow, he kisses your cheek, the clear rim of his specs skimming your nose. When he draws back, you look right into his eyes, wondering why heâs watching your mouth instead.Â
âMe, too.â Yoongi kisses your other side with a quiet peck. âFuck, me, too.âÂ
You fucking hate what you have to do, but you donât have a choice.Â
With one last lingering kiss, you both gather enough courage to set out and do what you must.Â
â
â
Your house is already a flurry of activity as you enter to see your brother in the kitchen, packing his leather duffle thatâs a constant companion on his trips.Â
Of course. The memory of him purchasing the lavish accessory pops into your head every time you watch him scurry around, dimples ever present on his proud cheeks. Itâs almost enough to make you smile yet again.Â
But you canât when the same face is currently scratched to hell. Just like Yoongiâs, if not worse.Â
Fuck, is he really gonna travel looking like that?Â
âHey,â he rasps out, still fighting off slumber. âYouâre back earlier than I thought.âÂ
âWanted to check on you before we left.â Fuck, your voice sounds like itâs being forced through a clogged pipe. Loosen the hell up! âAnd dude. Put some bandaids on, yeah?âÂ
âYeah, just give me a sec. Making sure I have everything before my ride gets here.âÂ
âHuh?â He got a ride? Youâre here now so you can take him to the airport. âYou sure you donât need me to drive you?âÂ
âYeah, itâs all good. I didnât know you were coming back.âÂ
Shit. His body seems just as angular as it did last night. Which, quite frankly, could still be from what went down in the lot.Â
Because even though you see both men banged up, you suddenly realize you donât actually know what all transpired.Â
After all, there wasnât much talk of it after you walked into the tempest of Yoongiâs living room.
Of course, you arenât gonna bring it up just this second. There are other things to ask about and make sure of first. âWallet? Phone? Passport?âÂ
âYup, yup, uhh.. Yup.âÂ
Zippers sling in the quiet morning air as you continue, âAnd youâre coming back on Friday, right?â
âOh.. Nah.â When you start crossing the kitchen, your brother hauls his leather bag over his better shoulder. Honestly, no one would be able to tell the other oneâs bruised with his suit on. That thing damn well covers everything except the cuts on his face and hands. âSaturday.âÂ
You pause in your journey to the medicine cabinet. âWait.. Saturday? The release partyâs on Friday.â
âYeah.. I know.â
What the fuck? Thatâs bullshit theyâre keeping him longer than they have to. Struggling to understand how corporate can keep your brother on a leash and get away with it, you urge, âTell them to at least let you go home a day early. Donât you wanna support your friends?â
âYou mean Yoongi?â
A zing of terror zips through your eyes, freezing every vein in an instant.Â
The fuck was that question? Never mind. Stay calm stay calm stay fucking calm. âUhh, yeah, heâs one of them? But the other guys, too, right? I know you care about them and this is huge.â
Mercifully, your sibling just shakes his head and waves you off. âDonât you think I already tried? I donât wanna miss it but I donât have a choice. Conference schedule is pretty tight and Iâm heading the panel on Friday.â
âIs it in the morning? You can fly out afterââ
âWhy are you fighting so hard?â
âWhy arenât you fighting harder!â
Okay, what in the hell is happening right now? Screw optics and how this must look for you, your brother needs to be there. Him and Yoongi are the tightest of friends, the most ride or die duo youâve ever seen. You canât picture a timeline where he misses this monumental moment, and itâs starting to really upset you that heâs barely trying.Â
âAlright, you know what?â Hard steps surge forward as you stand rigid, a duffle hastily dumped onto tile. âYou donât know what Iâve tried. You donât even know if I even told him yet.â
Fucking shit. You hold his stare before turning away, tossing out the idea of bandages entirely and searing footsteps into the hallwayâ
âOr do you.â
Before icing over with the unforgiving frost of zero gravity space.Â
Slow, you turn, not quite facing him but not backing down, either. ââŠExcuse me?â
âYou heard me. You talkinâ? What else has he been doing to you?â
Oh. Fuck that.Â
Doing to you?Â
Fuck all of this. This is too much to handle right now and you know youâre gonna snap if he keeps pushing because you are not having this conversation right before he leaves. Youâve already thought about this before, right? You cannot fuck with his head right before business trips because he needs to be on and locked in.Â
But now heâs fucking with your temper and those are some choice fucking words pulled out of his ass.Â
You donât think youâve ever legitimately threatened this man to his face and meant it before, and it tears a sharp corner of your heart, âYou better be very careful. With whatever you wanna say next.â
The air proves too thick to slice. While your body stands aflame, your brother is iced over, brimming with an energy that damn near takes physical form. âAll Iâm saying is? I find out some fucking bullshit is going onââ
No no no, not now.
Reacting fast is your only instinct, brain haywire and fizzling fizzling boiling. Harsh, you spin on your heel and shout the first thing you can think of, âOh, come onââ
âYou better hope to god youâre ready for whatâs comingââ
âStop!â Fuck fuck fuck, this is so frustrating because your head is exploding and your body is screaming to just tell him already. Fuck the consequences at this point this is ludicrous.Â
Doing to you? Yoongi? How dare he speak about his best friend like that how dare he accuse him without outright saying the words all you have to do is tell your brother how wrong heâs got it.Â
But you canât be the one. Yoongi said he would, and he probably took months to get to that point of strengthâand healing, from what you can tell.Â
This is between them. Them. You have to honor that, as much as you wanna just confess everything now and deal with it yourself.Â
But goddamn your brother is pulsing with anger and itâs leaking into your own charged air.Â
What does he think is happening? Does he think Yoongiâs just, what, playing you? Heâs wrong. Heâs so wrong. Yoongiâs been nothing but the best thing thatâs ever happened to you and shit your heart hurts becauseâŠ
Your brother is valid in thinking that.Â
How foolish. Didnât you guard your heart from Yoongi for the longest? Didnât everything start because you figured you knew who he was because of his reputation? You got him all wrong, too. So how can you be mad at your brother for doing the same?Â
Fuck, think. Just think before someone gets hurt.Â
Because if you arenât careful, someoneâor multiple someonesâwill get hurt in seconds. You have to bear the pain alone right now. To protect them both, you have to keep your trembling mouth shut.Â
And? You have to admit that something isnât fair here. Not to you, not to Yoongi, but to him. Last night was rough as fuck but, while you both got to have raw, beautiful closure, the one standing in front of you had to go to sleep in an empty house.Â
So chill the fuck out.Â
Breathing to cool down, you tense and loosen, tense and loosen. âI get it. Youâre angry, and you have a lot going on. But,â you bite down on your lip to keep going. âWeâre talking about something else. Weâre talking about you, and Iâm still pissed you even let those guys goad you into a fight. What are we, twelve?â
Seething, your sibling takes the switch of pace. But it is not what you want to hear. âAre you seriâ? What the hell was I supposed to do? That son of a bitch grabbed youââ
âI know,â you recoil. âDonât tell me like you were there, because you werenât.â
Finallyâfinallyâthose angry lines in his face vanish.Â
But they make way for something much worse than anger. Because your older brother, someone thatâs been there for you your whole life..Â
Looks absolutely stricken over the one time he wasnât.Â
Damn it.Â
Regretful, you drop your shoulders in exhaustion and quiet compromise. When you continue, your voice is much softer, âBut I told you: they were. Your friends, they were there because they knew you wanted that. Jimin got me away, Yoongi took me home and stayed.âÂ
You really have got to stop saying his name like you love him. It could start becoming too obvious.Â
Shuddering, you shift your weight, folding your arms and shrinking into yourself.Â
That night, despite Yoongiâs best and most gentle efforts, still clings to where that loser touched you at Dalo. You hate that you havenât gotten over it, and you loathe the way you still rub over the same spot. Over, and over. âWhat did you want him to do? Leave me here?â
âNo.âÂ
âExactly. And he didnât.â You adjust your stance again, making an impromptu gamble as you decide to let some truth leak out. Because your brother is owed at least this much. âAnd fine, you wanna know something? We do talk more because of it.â
Your brotherâs head snaps up, and you brace. Because if you show any shred of weakness or hesitation, heâll see right through your weak attempt to hide most of the truth,Â
âBut donât ever accuse him of doing anything to me. That was fucked up to say and you know it.â
âFuck.â In agreement, he rubs his hair back. âIt was. Iâm sorry.âÂ
âTrust me,â you swallow, hating that this is how things have to be for now. âYou have nothing to worry about. Heâs never.. Never done anything to me, anyway.âÂ
Itâs not a lie. Everything heâs done has been with you. For you. Because of you.Â
But your heartâs in anguish as it sinks. Because that expression on your older siblingâs face can only be one thing. Â
Pure. Utter. Relief.
Fire singes your eyes before you can quell the flame. Itâs the hardest technical truth to swallow.Â
Sure, he doesnât have anything to worry about as far as you being safe. And on top of that, he doesnât have to worry about any fake shit because Yoongi confessed to you last night.
But as far as his best friend sleeping with and now dating his sister behind his back? That is still very much sitting right in the center of the table.Â
And now youâre starting to see just how fucked all three of you are as soon as you sit down to eat the truth.Â
But Yoongi said heâd be the one to tell, so he will.Â
This feeling is so fucking miserable, though.Â
In the end, your brother is effectively convinced, raking a hand across his head and sighing. âJimin told me what all went down at Dalo, I just⊠Last night was⊠Fucked up.âÂ
âWell, yeah.â
âNo. See, this is just like what you said to me. You canât say it like you were there.â
Itâs your stomachâs turn to twist. âSo? You were scratched and bruised to hell, and YâŠâ Shut up, shut up. Youâre not supposed to know about the state of anyone else. âAnd you were⊠quieter.â
âBecause of what happened, dude.â
You blink. âWhat⊠What happened?â
Your brother looks at youâreally looks at you.Â
And suddenly, your gut flares in terror, storming in an instant across your abdomen.Â
âThat bitch pulled something on us.â
Your heart.Â
Itâs in freefall.
âWait⊠What?â You canât even form more than one syllable at a time, your legs turning gelatinous and knees starting to give out. âNo⊠What are youâŠ?â
What the fuck did he just say? That bitch pulled a what?Â
Your sibling slowly walks toward you once again, watching like heâs just waiting for you to say anything. Do anything.Â
But youâre a complete statue because all you can think about is the horror of something happening and the relief that nothing happened all at once.Â
Was Yoongi too scared to mention that part? Is this why he was holding back and shaking every time he reached out to touch you? Even this morning, he was soâŠÂ
Youâve never seen him like that. Is this why?Â
Your mind is swirling and crashing, overlapping each passing thought and scream running through your head. âIâm so sorry,â you hitch out, âI didnât know. Why didnât you say anything?â
âDidnât wanna scare you,â he sighs out. Putting both hands on his hips, your brother stops feet away, visibly still shook as he pierces wooden planks with his stare. âBut he pulled it right before Yoongi⊠and if it werenâtâŠFuck.âÂ
Burns flare and slice through your eyes when he has to pause. What is he trying to say? Pulled what?Â
Before Yoongi what?Â
Your brother continues, and your throat tightens. âIf it werenât for some random ass sirens, I⊠Things couldâve been so different.âÂ
What the fuck is happening. What the hell are you hearing?Â
âIt was probably dumb as fuck. But I was so fucking angry,â he grits out, watery eyes crushed looking your way. âSo fucking mad at how he was talking about you, I.. Walked right up to him and told him to fuck off.â
You canât even breathe.Â
âI still feel it,â he quietly adds, fingers pressed against his side. âRight here.âÂ
âFuck,â you finally choke out, eyes on fucking fire.Â
âBut all I knew was to keep you all safe,â he says, with hardened resolve and a wobbly chin. âAnd thatâs exactly what I did. I did that shit, even if that meantââÂ
Tears fling out of your eyes, flowing hot down your cheeks because you wouldnât want any of them to go out that way. Nothing happened nothing happened nothing happened and yet your body is acting as if something did and it hurts.Â
Your brother is there as soon as you crumple forward, letting you bury your head in his chest and sob your heart out. For him, for his friends, and for all the time you had with the man you love so, so dearly.Â
If anything happened to your brother before you came clean⊠If anything happened before you and Yoongi could evenâŠÂ
Suddenly, you feel equal weights of guilt. For running out on your brother. And for almost walking out on Yoongi.Â
You decide an apology is in order for both of them, and all the understanding in the world for Yoongiâs frosted demeanor as soon as you get him alone again.
And you are one hundred percent going to tell your brother everything once heâs back.Â
The tears cannot stop, and youâre sure you are crying unimpeded in a pressed and primmed suit. âIâm so sorry,â you keep repenting like a prayer. âThis is all my fault.â
âNoââ
âYou almostââ
âHey, stop.â He yanks you back, both of your faces soaked with saltwater. âWhat did I say before? I threw the first swing. You didnât do anything wrong.â
âBut it led to all this, I just.. I just feel so fucking stupid.â
âDonât. Hey, look at me.â Firm but gentle, he holds you at armâs length, forcing you to face him. âMaybe weâre both stupid, but you werenât the idiot. I was.âÂ
You feel so many conflicting things in your soul.Â
What would you have done if Yoongi was in critical condition? What would you have done differently if your brother was instead? Are they the same? Are the two situations really so different anymore?Â
No they arenât they arenât they arenât.Â
âPlease donât do that again,â you shake out. âEven if it was for me, if I ever lost you, I...âÂ
âYou know I canât promise anything.â He furrows his brows when you eye him with anger and sadness. âBut nothing like that is happening again. Especially with the same dudes.âÂ
âOkay.âÂ
A vicious tornado of emotions sends your whole body into agonizing pain. This isnât what you expected at all, and itâs causing your limbs to lock at the bends. Too many scenarios are jangling about yet you canât ask for specifics because that will just make it even more real.Â
A nightmare is somehow better once you know it ends with you waking up. âIâm⊠gonna need some time to process everything.â
âI know. And I wasnât planning on saying anything, but⊠You deserve to know the things I get into.âÂ
Ah.Â
The irony is not lost on you.Â
âAt least, if they involve you. We learned our lesson. You were right to tell us off.â
God. You feel numb.Â
âThanks,â you murmur, suddenly immensely tired. âI think I need more sleep.â
A blaring honk sounds outside the house, and you both flinch at the noise.Â
And your throat burns at the way your brother instinctively swept you behind his back.Â
When you realize what it is, you know what has to come next.Â
And heâs the first to react as he turns to face you again, âAlright. Iâm heading out, just remember to go get my baby when sheâs fixed, yeah?â
âDo you have to go?â
Wait.
The question seems to startle him as much as it does you.Â
How did you blurt it right out before even registering the words? Why does your heart clench at the sight of those eyes looking so pained?Â
Why does everything feel so shaky within these walls that were always your home?
âI do,â he says, voice tight. âIâm sorry.âÂ
And why the fuck do you feel sad heâs leaving?
âNo, no, itâs.. Of course you have to.â You canât help the lump in your throat from bobbing, the regret in your limbs as they barely move at your side. âI dunno why I asked, I guess I just..âÂ
Thereâs no response to your sniffle.Â
âSorry for yelling,â you squeak out. âI just feel really queasy.â
For a lot more reasons than one.
âWe all made it out,â your brother whispers. âThatâs what matters.â
âWill you⊠Will you at least try to be back for the party?â
The man swallows with his brows knit tight, then attempts to crack the tiniest smile. âYou know I will. Thatâs my guy.âÂ
âOkay.â You nod, sniffling again. After what he just told you? You know heâll do anything for the ones he loves. âSee you there.â
Your brother rubs a comforting palm over your head before turning, heading for the door and grabbing his leather duffle.Â
When he stops to glance at you one more time, you give a little wave of your hand before watching the door click shut.Â
Chest caving as you collapse to the ground in tears.Â
â
â
The need to call Yoongi burns so harshly your fingers damn near set your top aflame.
But heâs at work, and you canât fuck things up right when youâre approaching the finish line. You almost did with your brother, and that gave you twelve heart attacks in the span of minutes.Â
Still. Your chest aches so much that a thirteenth could very well be approaching. You donât even realize youâre bracing the hallway wall for support until you try to stand, back sore and aching from bending so far for so long.Â
What did your brother mean to say about Yoongi? What did that coward pull on them? Do you even want to know what happened?Â
Fighting back tears, you reach down for your phone, shakily typing out a message only to erase it. Then again. And again.Â
And again.Â
Giving up, you forcefully swallow all your worries, cringing at the bitterness of the unknown and the burnt molasses of hidden truths.Â
Itâs going to be okay. No matter what you think or imagine in your head, they made it out, they made it out, they are all alive.Â
Thatâs the only reason you can move forward, each step getting you from your room. To your bathroom.Â
And back again.Â
â
â
After showering, you feel lighter and refreshed, though the soreness between your legs has yet to leave.Â
But you wouldnât want it any other way, as itâs another reminder of Yoongiâs apparent brush with survival. His broken living room spurned the creation of your bond, your devotion to him as he confessed before you gave him your utmost trust in his sheets.Â
The end is so close. As soon as this week is over, youâll rip the last bit of peel from your pair of tangerines, baring all truths to your brother and facing the consequences.Â
Finally ready, you head to your car, opening your text threads with a plan: start slow.Â
Start with something that can be interpreted neutrally if anyone saw it on his phone screen, especially if your headstrong ex is in the room.Â
You [12:31pm]: how are you feeling?
Yoongi [12:34pm]: 1 AttachmentÂ
You close your door with brows furrowed.Â
Yoongiâs at the hospital?Â
Thatâs not what you expected at all.Â
Your chest swells with relief knowing heâs there, but you also wanna make sure heâs feeling okay. Especially his mental state after whatever the fuck your brother just dropped on you before leaving.Â
Goddamn, thatâs going to gnaw at your brain until you find the right time and right amount of courage to ask about it. Because itâs very possible Yoongi wonât tell you.Â
Because itâs probably something he knows you wonât like.Â
Fuck.Â
You [12:34pm]: Loved an Attachment
You [12:34pm]: thank you for listeningđ€ still sore?
Yoongi [12:35pm]: Yeah, but not bad. Just there.
Wait. Heâs not at the studio. That means you canâ
Yoongi: Outgoing Call
âHey.â
âHey,â you slowly say as you pull out into the street. âIâm driving now so this is easier.â
âCourse. You going to Taeâs?â
âMaybe. Iâm going to Yuriâs first.â You swallow, realizing that you didnât tell him about what you let slip before driving over. âI.. Told her. About you.â
Thereâs a little bit of silence on the line, just some adjustments and muffled speaker sounds. âSorry, just writing this down. Whatâs wrong with that?â
You huff through your nose. Gotta be those patient forms that always take forever to fill out. âOh. Just more and more people knowing, is all.âÂ
âEveryoneâs gonna know eventually.âÂ
You hold back a small smile. Because heâs right. âYeah. Iâm just tired of this feeling.â
âLike youâre hiding something.â
Itâs your turn for silence. He doesnât know how accurately that was played out today. The only answer you can provide is a curt, âExactly.â
âSame.â
Wings beat around your heart again.Â
He wants this. Yoongi really, really wants this. And years ago, that outcome wouldnât have even crossed your mind as an option.Â
âThank you for going, baby.â
âThe guys made me.â
You hum. âWhich ones.â
After a pause, you hear a puff of amusement. âAll of them at some point today, actually.âÂ
All of them? Does that include your brother? Did they talk about the trip already?
Your laugh is bittersweet. âWell. Glad to know you can be forced by everyone else except me.â
âHey, I was already gonna go because of you!â Yoongi quietly retorts, and you giggle at the pout in his words. âJust wanted to get a headstart on work first.â
You were right. He really does wanna go all out for his musical endeavors.Â
Itâs extremely admirable, and wildly attractive, but it does come to a point. âAs much as I love your passion, old man, I wanna keep you upright.â
He laughs soft into the line, and you think you can listen to that specific sound on an infinite loop. âThatâs fair.âÂ
âHow long is it gonna take, you think?â
âDunno. But Iâll keep myself busy until Iâm out.â
Of course he will. You donât doubt he wonât waste any time. Didnât he bring journals in his backpack? You wouldnât be surprised if he wrote ten thousand songs before being called in. âJust call me if you need anything, please?â
âOf course, babe.â
âThank you,â you say with utmost sincerity. âIf only my brother would be less stubborn and get checked, too.â
âHeâll probably do it once he gets there.â
âDid you convince him?â
âNah. But once he knows I did, heâll do it.â
âFigures.â You scoff. âOkay, Iâm almost there. Let me know how it goes.â
âK. Bye, doll.â
You didnât ask him what went down. But itâs not the time nor place, and you have plenty of chances this week to figure out when that would beâif at all.Â
âTalk soon.âÂ
â
â
For a normally bustling household, Yuriâs house is quiet.Â
So itâs not shocking when you walk into the kitchen and see all your friends glance your way, slowly vacating their chairs with eyes never leaving your face. Even Reia is on high alert.Â
Did Yuri tell her? Did Yuri tell anyone else?Â
No. Sheâs a talker and loves spilling, but she promised. And when she promises something, you know you can trust her to keep it.Â
Itâs what pours emotion in your voice as you meekly greet, âHey, guysââ
A crushing hug closes your throat. Yuriâs the one that gets to you first, with Reia and Dominique waiting their turns to offer you healing, relieved embraces.Â
âWhat happened?âÂ
âScared us half to death.â
Dom puts you at armâs length to give a once over, noting your face rubbed raw and eyes still a little bloodshot. Thankfully, her pupils hold more concern than disappointment. âYou good?â
Your eyes wobble alongside your smile, and you think itâs enough proof. âMore than that,â you still decide to whisper, and your heart beats again at her reaction.Â
âThank god. I was ready to kick your ass if you werenât.â
Heading up to Yuriâs room, you all wait until the door is swung back before mounting her canopy bed, sitting in a tight circle as you divulge everything.Â
Well. Almost everything.Â
You tell them that Yoongi is the one youâve been seeing, how you went to check on him last night in a panic, and the terrifying reason why. When you mention the fight after the basketball game, all three of your friends erupt in questions, and you have to assure them everything turned out okay. Honestly, you also do this to assure yourself, too.Â
âSo⊠Your brotherâs just fine with all of this?â Reia asks, not noticing the tick of Domâs jaw.Â
âWell,â you start with a higher pitch, earning a pair of groans. âHe doesnât exactly know yetââ
âYup. Heâs gonna murder him.â
âYeah, should we say our condolences now or..â
âHow long has this been going on?â Reia fires off another question that digs into your chest. âWas he the one you were seeing the whole time?â
âYes,â you admit with a sigh. âI shouldâve told you guys from the beginning, but. The whole thing just felt so delicate. But! We just started making things official recently, so..âÂ
Dom turns your way. âOfficial how?â
Well. Here goes everything.Â
With a shaky breath, and lingering feelings from the time it happened, you reveal with watery eyes, âYoongi⊠Told me he loves me.â
Both Yuri and Reia react in yelps, Domâs gaze lowering as the girls reach to grab your hands.Â
Wait. Whatâs going on with her? Sheâs the one that knows the most, sheâs the one that covered for you all those months ago. She has to be the one that is the least surprised at all this.Â
Blinking, you note to confront her about it later. Right now, youâre too focused on trying not to cry as your friends tumble out questions and support,Â
âHe said it? Did you say it first or did he?âÂ
âHow did it happen! Oh, Iâm so happy for you, babeââÂ
âThankâthank you, Yuri,â you squeeze out as she hugs you close. âI couldnât believe it, but he just.. Said it. We werenât even doing anything, I was just.. Looking up what injuries he could have..âÂ
And he confessed in the most Yoongi fashion he could have.Â
Looking back, it shouldnât shock you at all. Heâs always found ways to sweep you off your proverbial feet, so why would a confession plucked from the heavens be any different?Â
She lets you go before wiping her eyes, Reia and even Dom now sporting watery pupils, too.Â
âAs much as Iâm upset at you for not telling us, Iâve never been so happy for you.â When Yuriâs features crease in another sob, you sniffle along with the rest. âItâs been so long since you⊠And you really.. Fuck.âÂ
You know what sheâs trying to say, and the realization has your throat constricting so tight.Â
Itâs been forever since youâve had something like this, someone like this. When you and Jungkook were together, you told him that you loved him before he broke it off.Â
Sure, you bought the rings together, but he never uttered those words until years after when it didnât even matter. And all your relationships after his were complete and utter bullshit, so you donât think you ever even heard those three words and knew them to be true.Â
Yoongi was the first to ever say them so sincerely.Â
And that fact makes your ducts burn and burn.Â
And when Yuri finally speaks, it breaks the dam holding your real deluge back,Â
âI canât think of anyone else that deserves to be loved more than you.âÂ
All at once, everything streams out as you hunch forward. The pain of everything youâve endured, the hopelessness of knowing youâd most likely end up alone, the excruciating prospect of a future that you never deemed bright, or peaceful, or comforting.Â
And to think that even this man couldâve been snatched away from you in a snap? Even more tears overlap with the ones youâre shedding, and you canât even reach out to hug all three beautiful, angelic souls surrounding you with tight arms and sobs because your limbs lock at all bends.Â
Itâs the exact release you need. All your friends supporting you, all the pent up anxiety of last night and today, the truth setting itself free in some capacityâall in the comfort of a plushie-laden bed you only doubted yourself in last time.Â
Everythingâs gonna be alright. It has to be. Youâre gonna fight for the ones you love, even if a war between them is inevitable.Â
It takes a few minutes of heavy silence for you all to separate, swiping and rubbing tears while letting out happy sniffles.Â
When you thank them for being understanding, they assure you itâs okay. And when you say youâre going to tell your brother soon, a force from the doorway has all of you leaping from lilac sheets,Â
âTell him what?âÂ
Jia stands firm with a laundry basket at her hip, and Yuri scoffs at her older sister for barging in. âA knock wouldâve been nice!âÂ
Fuck!Â
You canât tell Jia of all people. If you spill anything about Yoongi, sheâs one hundred percent going to tell your brother. Theyâre the same age, and run in pretty tight circles, so of course you are not going to risk it.Â
But you can tell her something else youâre going to tell your older sibling, so you fire out a half-truth,Â
âTell him not to pick any other fights that could get him killed.âÂ
Jiaâs eyes zoom to your wrecked face, and she drops the laundry with haste before asking, âWhat happened? When? Tell me now.âÂ
Huh. Maybe your brother has a type, if heâs still into Jia like he said before.Â
You feel a little spark in your chest as you let her know they all got in a scuffle after the basketball game, and another pang as she immediately abandons the room and clothes with a fierce declaration,Â
âIâm gonna kill them myself!âÂ
âDonât worry, I already hounded my brother!â You call out after her, sighing as Yuri shakes her head with a smile. âShe gets like that when sheâs really worried, huh.âÂ
âYeah..â Your friend leans to look around you, noticing the basket left alone on the ground. âAnd if sheâs super fired up, she drops everything and doesnât stop until itâs handled. Clearly.âÂ
Maybe both older siblings really are similar.Â
The firestorm of an interruption seemed to break the tension in the room, with all of you finally relaxing and catching up. When they ask you questions, you answer what you can.Â
And when you divulge information that has your ears burning, their squeals and yells give you whole new reasons to live.Â
â
â
After a very comforting lunch Yuriâs mom cooked, you head to the bathroom when your phone suddenly vibrates through your palm.
Huh? Thatâs weird. You expect the name on your screen to be Taehyung, not Yoongi.Â
Not that itâs a bad thing. Youâve been waiting to hear from him, so this is a pleasant surprise.Â
Closing the door to the guest bathroom, you gaze at the calming sage decor with a smile. âHi, how did itââ
âYouâre coming over later, right?â
Oh, shit. Is he okay?
âYes, baby,â you respond with a soothing lilt, ears perked and body on high alert.Â
Does he think you arenât anymore? You both decided on the plans earlier. Surely he knows youâd never just flake on him. âIâm coming back once youâre done with work, remember?â
Thereâs an uncomfortable pause on the line, which makes your boyfriendâs next question jab you so far in the lungs you canât breathe,
ââŠCan it be now?â
Shit.Â
Just like Jia earlier, you drop every plan you have to the wayside. Youâre sure that Taehyung will understand, and you already got through the biggest conversation you needed to with your friends.Â
âOf course,â you whoosh out. âLemme just say bye and Iâll go.âÂ
âTake your time.â A small shuffling interrupts. âItâll take me a bit to get back.âÂ
âOkay. See you there.âÂ
The strained urgency in his voice makes your hair stand on end, so you vacate the bathroom to inform the girls that you gotta goâbut not without a quick head tilt towards Dom, who follows you outside and into the afternoon sun. Â
â
â
You wait until youâre next to your car on the street, turning with a concerned expression and jittery nerves, âWhatâs up with you? Did I do something wrong?â
Turns out, you read Dominique correctly. Her jaw locks before loosening, and it reminds you of the time she confronted you about Yoongi before. God, how much has changed since then. That feels like ages and ages ago.Â
âItâs not about you,â your best friend clears the air and the tightness in your shoulders. âIâm just.. Glad he came around.â
âYoongi?â When Dom nods, you blink. âWait, what?â
âAt your house that night.. After he left your room, we hadâI dunno, a heart-to-heart.â She sighs, flicking braids over her shoulder. You note to compliment the beads she chose this time, because they remind you of summer and simpler times. âI mightâve pressured him a bit, and.. I think he wanted to tell me that he loved you. All the way back then.âÂ
Something in your heart stutters, and you can only repeat your last question, âWhat?â
âYeah. Something about needing to do something first,â she continues, holding your gaze with perfect brows furrowed in sunlight. âBut I could tell he was damn serious about whatever it was. And if he was willing to do it for you? I let it go.âÂ
Your mind whirls.Â
Yoongi was already in love with you back then? Is that why he needed to let you go? To deal with whatever he had to do?Â
One side of you breaks thinking he had to go through all that alone; the other side is screaming at his past self for not even giving you a choice. What did he go through? What did he have to do?
Now you really have to see him. Immediately.Â
âThank you, Dom,â you rush out while opening your door. âIâm just happy itâs over.â
âThe hell itâs not.â Shooting you a glare that heats the oncoming breeze, she reminds, âItâs not over until your brother knows. And based on everything thatâs happened? That conversation is not gonna go over well.âÂ
A dark, simmering boil starts in your stomach, and youâre already feeling queasy again. Tightening your door handle, you gulp hard. âI know.âÂ
âTrust me, Iâm happy for you both. I am.â Both hands find her hips as she levels a gaze that you really, really donât enjoy. âBut Iâm gonna be honest, I think this is gonna ruin their friendship for good.âÂ
Both of your lungs clamp shut.Â
âPlease donât say that,â you beg, âIâm gonna fight for all of us. I will.âÂ
âI donât doubt that, babe. Hey, uh uh, come here.â Reaching out, she gives you a tight hug just when you feel fragile again.Â
âListen to me. I donât doubt that,â she says into your shoulder. âIâm just here to be realistic. Just donât be shocked if thatâs how it goes. Weâll be here for you no matter what, too.âÂ
âOkay,â you say with a scrunched face into her scent. God, she always smells so good, and itâs almost enough to calm you down. Almost almost almost. âThank you. But Iâm not giving up.âÂ
âThatâs my girl.â She squeezes you one more time. âI love you.âÂ
With eyes searing over, you choke and grip her tighter. âI love you, too.âÂ
â
â
Yoongiâs door warms your back as you wait for him to show.Â
But thereâs a good chance it can just be your volcanic anxiety.Â
Ever since your arrival, youâve paced, youâve gnawed on your lips, youâve had to shake the nerves out of your hands.Â
And over and over, youâve strained your neck to look for your favorite cat, because you could sincerely use even a glimpse of her right now.Â
While she doesnât end up showing, Yoongi rounds the nearest corner minutes after your last desperate scan.Â
Fuck, heâs so handsome.Â
Even now, as he simply walks toward you with a backpack slung over his shoulder, you watch with undying yearning to feel those flowing bangs over his forehead. Youâd even settle for a single touch of his cheeks, one of them currently sporting a thin bandage.
But the closer Yoongi gets, the quicker your admiration morphs into concern. Thereâs a deep bend in his brows that you canât decipher, and his fist is balled pretty tight.Â
Seriously, what happened? He looks so troubled that you slowly push off the doorway to ask,Â
âBaby, whatâsââ
A bag hits the ground before youâre swooped into a kiss so electric your lips spark.Â
Him. Him, him, and more him. For the love of everything you donât understand whatâs happening but you kiss Yoongi back with everything you have, arms slinging around his strong shoulders and tugging him closer because he clearly needed this.Â
And fuck if you didnât need it just as much. Screw it if anyone sees you. This is all you want and youâll stay right here until he pulls away.Â
When he finally does, both of you swallow to catch your breaths, and your soul glimmers when his forehead meets yours.Â
âHi, baby,â you whisper to his exhales. âMissed you, too.â
Silent, your lover kisses your forehead before hugging you close, and youâre more sure of your prediction than ever. Something is bothering him.Â
He doesnât look worse, at least. But thereâs clearly something off and heâs not hiding it. His lack of words is loud enough.Â
âLetâs go inside,â you quietly suggest. âI wouldâve gone in already but I donât have a key.â
He nods, fishing out his keyring to let you both inside.Â
When you set your bags down and slip off your shoes, itâs only seconds before youâre softly pulled into a hug again, surprising yet so, so welcoming.Â
Even only after a few hours, youâve missed the fuck out of him. Which makes all of this an outright dream.Â
âSorry,â Yoongi finally murmurs against your shoulder. âI justâŠâ
âNothing to be sorry for.â You stroke a hand along his hair, massaging his scalp and loving how soft it feels. The windswept strands fall back into place as you keep running your fingers through. âDid you at least get your appointment?â
âYeah, I did.â He buries his face further. âNothing bad. Just canât lift anything heavy for a couple days.â
âGood. Thatâs easy to manage,â you whisper back into his tee, feeling the chill of lingering air conditioning and body warmth all at once. âIs something else bothering you?â
âNot exactly.â Whatever that means. âIâll tell you about it later. Just wanted this, and you.â
Oh. ThatâsâŠÂ
âIâm here now, love,â you assure with a melting heart, wondering what happened to cause this behavior.Â
Is it because of last night? Or something that happened today? Youâre anxious all over again, but from the way Yoongiâs acting, your worries are second to his. âHave you eaten yet?â
He shakes his head, only pulling you closer with not a word from his lips.Â
And from this point on, you make a silent vow to yourself. Whatever Yoongi needs, youâre going to take care of him.Â
No matter what, these next few days are all about himâa minuscule sacrifice in comparison to everything heâs done for you, whether you knew about it or not.
âIâll make you something then. Come on.âÂ
When you walk, you slip your hand down his arm to hold his hand, and your lead into his kitchen is short.Â
âAny requests?â You cheerfully ask as you spare a smile over your shoulder. âWe can do⊠Something lightâŠâ
Only to see him staring back with nothing but a lingering sense of longing.
Okay.Â
You need to get to the bottom of this now.Â
Stopping right over linoleum, you leave no room for arguments, âYoongi. Tell me whatâs wrong.â
He blinks before his gaze meets the floor. So youâre confused when he simply, quietly..Â
Laughs?Â
âItâs not that somethingâs wrong,â he slowly starts, a shy smile carving his features. âFor the first time in my life, nothingâs wrong.âÂ
Your heart beats extra loud.Â
âBut itâs too much to explain right now.â His eyes rise to meet yours. âJust know that Iâm so in love with you.âÂ
Oh.
âAnd I want you to know that every day I live.â
Fuck.
Your body responds before you can say anything, lips connecting to remove any need for speech. The knowledge of them all staring death in the face last night makes this confession sear your insides, and you canât help but kiss him like youâll never get to again.Â
Yanking him back, you spin on your heel until he flings into the kitchen, clutching your wrists before gripping your jaw with both hands.Â
His mouth heats on yours, his glasses the only barrier between your skin. Everything sizzles from your head to your toes, and you both bang into a countertop beforeâ
âFuck, ouch.â
âShit, you okay?â
Yoongi rubs his side with one eye pinched shut, a corner of his teeth present. âYeah. Worth it, though.â
âBe serious,â you reprimand. Looks like heâs gonna have to take it easy, which means no going at it like animals until heâs on the mend. âNo more until you feel better, yeah?â
âSays who?â
âBabe.â
His deadly pout almost breaks your resolve. âFine.âÂ
But you can wait. Youâre sure it wonât take long, and for this man? Youâll wait however long you need to.Â
Besides, thereâs plenty of things you can do in the meantime that donât require running into hard objects.Â
âGood. Now letâsâŠâ You turn away to get started before youâre held, and pulled back into yet another embrace.Â
What the hell is happening today? Your lungs and your melting pile of a brain can only take so much. Itâs beautifully overwhelming how Yoongi canât seem to let you go, because youâre the one that always loses control.Â
This whole time, itâs been you that canât hold yourself back.Â
So now? Being on the other side? You donât think you ever want him to restrain himself again.Â
This time, he moves slow. Sensuously slow, and it would occur to you that heâs finding a very cheeky loophole to your plan if you werenât so hazy-eyed.Â
Whatever Yoongiâs doing, you wonât stop him.Â
Your back touches a counter before Yoongi cages you in, and your lips mold together as perfectly as his body does with yours. Your unhurried strokes match his, and your minds communicate without a single word.Â
Thereâs yearning still ever present. But thereâs comfort in abundance, and a whole new level of need.Â
After he pulls away, you can visibly see him drink you in from head to toe.Â
âYou know.. Iâm good holding off on all the other shit.â Pulling you in, his lips curve as he confidently declares, âBut Iâm never gonna stop kissing you.âÂ
His hands, his lips, his words. They all have healing powers, youâre so sure of it. If Yoongi hasnât yet realized his unending pain has blossomed into a safe haven, you need to let him know no matter what,Â
âGood.â
Thereâs still a pining in his eyes, but he lets you free, hand skirting your hip before he walks to his room. âGonna change then Iâll help.âÂ
âYou donât have to, baby,â you say as you struggle to catch your breath. âI got it.âÂ
Three minutes later, heâs chopping an onion anyway.Â
But youâre loving how serene everything feels with the two of you prepping and dicing, thumps of knives on wood intertwining in sound before you laugh at his crying over the pesky vegetable. Maybe if he wore contacts instead of specs, heâd be better off.Â
Not that his choice of eyewear is what youâre complaining about. But those glasses paired with the cream tees heâs been wearing? There will be hell to pay as soon as you get a chance at revenge.Â
Your pot is set to boil for a bit, so you finally rest against the counter and start a timer on his microwave. âGo ahead,â you gesture to your very handsome cooking partner. âYou can sit now.â
âHuh? Weâre not done yet.â
âOh.â Blinking, you tilt your head in confusion because you couldâve sworn you heard him yawn a couple times. âYou arenât tired?â
âI am,â he says before squeezing his eyes, rapid blinks to follow. âBut Iâm fine here.â
You toss and turn the food around, sprinkling a little more seasoning and hearing the bubbles and fizzes. When you stir a little more, a sudden thought occurs, halting your movements and spinning you around,Â
âAre you staying there to watch my ass.â
Yoongiâs slow smile gives everything away, but he also makes up for the blatant staring.Â
âCanât deny thatâs one of the things.â Pushing off the sink, he stands right next to you, slotting a hand behind your neck and angling you for a kiss. âBut I meant it earlier. I justâŠâ
Youâre completely silent as you watch him slide his eyes from your face to the sizzling food. Whatever heâs thinking about, youâre gonna give him all the room to talk.Â
âJust like being where you are.âÂ
How you went from almost running out of his door to here, you arenât quite sure. But youâre grateful for that split second of him deciding to fight for the two of you instead of against, because you really were going to leave.Â
And you may have taken much, much longer to even try going back.Â
Your voice is barely heard over the aromatic smell and fizzle, âGood thing I like having you around.â When he smiles again, you let out a breath of a giggle, going back to shuffling the pan around and tilting your head to the fridge. âI put some fruit in there if you wanna eat that, too.â
âIâm down.â
âK.â
Your food is ready soon enough, and the two of you eat while talking about easy topics. Like work and your workplace dynamics, what Yoongiâs team has been working on at the studio.Â
At one point, your curiosity about the album release party grows from something he says. âSpeaking of. The partyâs on Friday, right?â
âYeah.â
âOkay, I thought so,â you deflate, setting your bowl down on the table. âSorry he canât go.â
âHuh?â
Your body stills. âWait. Did he not say anything? About his trip being extended?â
So much for nothing in his life being wrong. From the lost look on his face, you may have given him another reason to fold back in on himself. âNo.. No, he didnât.â
Both of you sit in silence.Â
This could be nothing. Right? That means your brother is confident he can make it so thereâs no point in telling Yoongi heâs gonna miss it. Or maybe heâs not trying hard enough and then not being able to say it to his face?Â
âIâm sorry,â you apologize. âI thought he told you.â
âItâs okay.â Clearly itâs not. âNot much to do about it now.â
âYoongi⊠What if he knows?â At your own question, you stiffen, curling into a proverbial ball. Fear and the sick backfire of fibbing has your mouth going drier than desert air. âWhat if he actually knows?â
Setting down his chopsticks, Yoongi looks your way, eyes unreadable behind his specs. âIf he did, do you think heâd leave us alone?â
Heâs got a point. âGuess not.âÂ
âMm.â Flicking his eyes to the window, he adjusts uncomfortably in his chair. âAnd I dunno if I mentioned this, but.. He thinks I got back with my ex.â
âFuck, really?âÂ
âThatâs the real reason why he hasnât been talking to me. Maybe he thinks sheâs gonna be there on Friday.â
âOh.â Your shoulders sag, and sag. Not owning up to your relationship is one thing; Yoongi having to dwell in his previous relationship is another. âIs that⊠worse?â
âShit.â Reaching across wood, you close your hand around his fingers for support. Itâs the only thing you can think to do. At least, itâs what you would want if you were in his shoes. âI think you should tell him she wonât be.â
A million seconds later, Yoongi thankfully agrees. âYeah, I will.â
You feel better. Somewhat. At least a little less nauseous about the possibility of your brother knowing.Â
But it still sucks knowing that heâs actively avoiding Yoongi because of an ex he used to have.Â
How bad was it back then if this is the case? What exactly happened? Is this why Yoongi went radio silent on you for weeks?
It seems like he doesnât even wanna talk about her. So you wonât pry just yet, as much as you wanna know every single thing sheâs done wrong so you can hound her through every timeline in existence.Â
Instead, you talk about a much better subject,Â
âWe should feed my cat now.â
And you quickly laugh at the saucy glint in Yoongiâs eyes.Â
â
â
Everything is set where it needs to be. Sugarâs food and water fill their respective bowls, your shoulder leans into Yoongiâs good side, and his arm rests around your back as heâs propped up by his banged up doorway.Â
You remember the first time you saw him lean against the wood like this. Only that time, you were a shell of a girl, waiting with shaky breaths and shaken confidence to hear his response to your inappropriate request.Â
Who wouldâve thought that youâd be on the same side as him all these months later? In his arms, resting a head on his warm chest?Â
When you let out a short chuckle, Yoongi turns to your smile. âHmm?âÂ
âNothing,â you wisp out. âJust thinking about us.âÂ
His fingers press into your side a fraction more, and you can feel him lift his head again. âMe, too.âÂ
Umm.Â
You can say things like that. He isnât allowed!Â
Youâre about to set some one-sided rules before your gift pops out of the bushes a few feet away.Â
âMy baby!â you quietly call, leaving Yoongiâs side to crouch down. âCome here, love. You hungry?â
She cautiously makes her way over, sniffing your hand when you leave it outstretched. After careful consideration, the little one nudges your palm, letting you glide fingers down her back as she approaches her bowls.Â
âYouâre so tiny,â you observe with slight pity. âWeâll get you well fed in no timeââ
âHey, Sugar! Oh, is this her? Sheâs gorgeous, no wonder!â
Huh? Sugar?Â
Who else knows the catâs name already?
Your neck almost strains when you look up to see whoâs talking. When you notice an older lady donning a really comfy, fluffy robe, you feel like it looks super familiar before you stand.Â
âHi,â you greet before introducing yourself, extending your hand and shaking the womanâs soft, delicate fingers. âSorry if we were too loud.â
âCall me Miss Dion. And you werenât too loud this time, sweetie,â she says with a wink, glancing down at the kitty eating what you laid out. âWas just cominâ out to water my plants so itâs good to see youâre here, too. Looks like he finally got some sense back in that head of his.â
âIâm standing right here, you know.â
âOh, I know!â
Back? How long has she known about you? Do her and Yoongi actually converse regularly? Their banter is⊠Really adorable.Â
Itâs making you fall even more in love with the man biting his cheek in amusement.Â
Wait.Â
Is Yoongi Sugar?Â
That is so fucking cute you could cry.Â
âIâm back to take care of this guy,â you explain with a head tilt. âAnd the little one, of course.âÂ
Itâs when you say this that Miss Dion notices the bandages on Yoongiâs face, concern pushing down her brows. âWhat happened to you, young man?â
âNothing to worry about.âÂ
âYou sure? I got some ointment in my kitchen somewhereââ
âItâs all goodââ
âWeâll take it,â you cut him off, not looking but feeling his stare on your face. âHow much do we owe you?âÂ
âOh, donât you worry about that.â With a snuff at Yoongi and a smile your way, Miss Dion heads inside to fetch a bottle.
In the meantime, you give your lover a quiet stare before bending down to run your hands over soft fur.Â
âPapa Sugar is gonna need that so he canât argue,â you coo to your cat, cheekily ignoring Yoongiâs sputtering puff of air above your head.
âPapa Sugar? Really?â
You glance up to his smile with a mischievous one of your own. âWhat, you wanna be Sugar Daddy instead?â
The swirl in your belly is instant. Because Yoongi can only look out into the distance, biting his lip and failing to hide his grin.
Sigh. If only he didnât have those injuries across his face. Youâd push him back into the door and slam it shut if it was any other day.Â
Patience, patience, patience.Â
Those hits arenât gonna heal with just one round of gauze.Â
When you have to replace the cotton patches, at least youâll have something to help.Â
â
â
Itâs not until youâre about to tuck in for the night that Yoongi approaches your side of the bed. Judging by the headphones slung around his neck, heâs about to work, so you assume heâs just coming to give you a kiss goodnight.Â
But after he does exactly that, he asks you a question that warms your chest,Â
âWhereâs your keys.âÂ
âIn there,â you motion to the nearest wall, bag propped right under his windowsill. âInside pocket, I think.âÂ
Yoongi bends with a prolonged grunt, slowly rummaging until he finds your jangling keyring with its charms. When he grabs it, he silently sits on the edge up against your stomach, body heat permeating your tee while he fiddles with the clasps.Â
God, youâre so in trouble. You know exactly what heâs doing.Â
Unlike the last time he offered you complete access to his place, this time he didnât even hesitate. And the way he secures a key amongst the loop, itâs his silent way of cementing permanence.Â
Thatâs not another key for you to borrow.
Because that key is yours.
â
â
continued in angel, pt. 2
pitstop inbox before pt2!! | join the server!
a/n: holy crap we're doing it we are actually back in the main storyline?! how do we feel right now because i am over the damn moon diving into this story again. here's a slight pitstop before you make your way over to part two (THE CONTINUATION IS IN A REBLOG!) so take a breather before heading into the resttttttt
++ feedback box:
â„ of course, any reblogs/comments/messages are appreciated!
â„ for the ones that are too shy to reblog with a review, comment on this, or send a message, i went ahead and made another anonymous form where you can send in what you think!
â„ no emails collected, no need to put in a username. itâs literally just a comment dropbox :D feedback can be as short/sweet or as long as youâd like!
â„ here!
++ more links:
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a/n 2: we did this for 3tanfugue and the energy was great! just like last time, some of you guys suggested that we have post goals to encourage interaction. no one voted against it yet, so we'll keep it goin!
note goal: since we're back in main storyline, upping the goal! 1,000 notes is the goal, so when we hit that, 3tan14 will be dropped as soon as it's done! thank you all for reading and would love to hear any thoughts: what did you like about the chapter? how did a certain scene make you feel? what are you excited to see next? any shares, comments, tags, and reblogs with commentary count, and i appreciate anything you guys have to say.
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explicit warnings: cursing, thigh riding, cowgirl, oral (m rec), naughty studio time(??), couch sex, rough sex, giving yoongi the business, bold as fuck reader, choking, spanking, penetrative sex, kissing deserves to be here too lol, alexa play no hands by waka flocka, deep throating, hair/head tugging, nipple play, yoongi in that gd tank, yoongi in those gd glasses, teasing, titty fucking hello!!!!, stripping while he watchesâŠ. yeah, missionary, sub!3tanyoongi?????, scratching, multiple orgasms, protected sex, emotional sex, the glasses.. stay on??, good god theyâre so hot iâm blushing
â
â
Itâs morning when Jimin gets a call.Â
Shifting in sheets that arenât his, he sleepily blinks once before eyeing the blue light with a squint, wondering who dares wake him up before his natural rise. What time even is it anyway? Itâs gotta be an ungodly hour if his circadian rhythm is disturbed.Â
Still, he grabs his cell from the nightstand, flinching at the movement behind him and inwardly slinging out curses.Â
Because waking him up is one thing.Â
But if anyone disturbs Taehyung heâs gonna give them hellâ
Min Yoongi: Incoming Call
Shit.
Jimin yanks the covers off, rushing out of bed and snapping Tae awake anyway. For what? Donât fucking know, but theyâre ready. Wherever. Whatever. They already stayed up clutching their phones until they physically couldnât keep their eyes open.Â
Because as much as Yoongi assured him nothing would happen, Jimin still couldnât let go of his car keys.
Answering slow, he feels his chest winding and winding, eyes locked with Taehyung while they both wait on edge, ââŠYoongi?â
âYeah.â
Thank the fucking stars.Â
Yoongiâs okay. Heâs on the line. He made it to morning or whatever fucking time it is, and heâs doing exactly what he said he would.
And itâs enough, enough, enough.
Burns zing up the corners of Jiminâs eyes, and he swipes hard as Taehyung moves, likely to hear whatâs happening and even more likely to just be by his side.Â
Jimin is grateful for either one. But he tries to keep composure as he croaks, âYou better have woken me up for a reason.â
The slight hum on the line induces a wobbly smile. âYou slept?â
âFuck you,â Jimin shakily laughs, wiping liquid relief from an eye before Taehyungâs thumb brushes tenderly over the other. His gaze is thankful while continuing, âWe did but not much.â
âSorry.â
âItâs okay.â Sniffling, Jimin walks to Taeâs door, letting him into the hallway first and finally drinking in the sight of his ass in those sweats. Because he can finally function like a normal, smitten loser again. âWeâll come over so we canââ
âNo need.â
âWhat?â Nope. Back to panic mode. And judging from his boyfriendâs posture, Taehyung has backpedaled into that, too. âWhat do you mean no need?â
Thereâs a slight pause on the line, and small noises make their way through the speaker. It sounds like bedsheets, but it also sounds likeâŠÂ
âSheâs still sleeping.â
Oh.
Oh, shit.
A tidal wave of relief crashes into Jiminâs ducts as he hangs his head, palming his face caught in a heavy tide of emotion. When he turns, Taehyung fairs no better, his eyes red and fingers wiping at a perfect, perfect cheek. One of them sniffles, but Jimin canât tell if itâs him or not, because his vision is blurry and his heart is beating, beating, beating again.Â
Whether you know it or not, whatever you did last night may have just changed Yoongiâs entire life.
Because Jimin knows this man through and through. Years of picking up his habits and tells didnât amount to nothing. Itâs how he was able to sense exactly when to intervene, and how he knew exactly what that hauntingly hollow tone in Yoongiâs voice meant when he busted in that day.Â
The tone he hears now? The man that just spoke on the line?Â
That is a Min Yoongi so in love he canât even hide it over the phone.Â
Fuck.Â
Gathering himself, Jimin squeaks out, âI⊠Iâm glad youâŠâ What the fuck does he say? Every thought jams in his throat so hard he has to hand the phone off.
Thankfully, Taehyung perfectly continues his thoughts, voice scratching rocks under a waking river, âWeâre glad youâre both safe.â
âMm.â
âSo whenâs the wedding?â
Jimin huffs through a fresh batch of tears, clearing his face before grinning at Tae very seriously awaiting an answer. Honestly, at this point? Itâs not far-fetched. Jiminâs seeing your future clearer than his present, and maybe he will be a fun uncle sooner than he thinks.
If only Yoongi would just get the fucking talk with your brother over with.Â
But Jimin understands the hesitation. If he were in that same position, thereâs no telling when he would be courageous enough to stand up to the guy. Thereâs a reason heâs quick to command a room, and his lifelong mission to protect his younger sister made him grow up a lot faster than everyone else.Â
Still⊠Yoongi just deserves to be happy. And youâre the very obvious answer to helping with that.Â
As much as he may have wanted some chances of his own, Jimin is grateful you found your way into his best friendâs heart. Not just anyone is invited inside, and even less people can truly be allowed to stay.Â
And youâre probably the only one that has permanent residence.Â
âYou guys should get some sleep.â
Taehyung pouts right on cue, and Jimin canât fight those sleepy, droopy eyes. âYou didnât answer me.â
Cute as fuck! He must be stopped. Taking the phone, Jimin speaks into the line fully recovered, shooting his cheeky partner a teasing glare, âWe will if you get some, too.â
âCanât.â
âWhy not?â
âGot some things to do at the studioââ
âNo!â They reject together, both equally as appalled because what the fuck kinda answer is that?Â
âAfter what happened last night? Are you crazy?â
âWhat happened to spending time with her? Men!âÂ
âHeâs going on a business trip, I canât lose to him.â
âSo what?â Tae asks before they both share an even further confused look. Yoongi may be a lovesick fool but that doesnât give him an excuse to be a dumbass! âYouâre just gonna leave her alone?â
Thereâs a sigh on the line before Jimin plants a hand on his hip. âNot just that. You gotta rest, too, bro. If she doesnât tell you to take it easy or at least get checkedâwhich she willâweâre going over there to annoy you.âÂ
âYou serious?â
âYes, Iâm serious.â Jimin cocks his head and leans closer to the phone. âAt least rest easy for the next couple days. Especially if you have all this time to see each other.â
The timing couldnât be more perfect. Your brother is leaving for his trip and Yoongi caught some unfortunate hits to his ribs. The dude basically has a free pass to spend the whole week with you, and heâs not even taking full advantage of it? Oh, the things Jimin has to say about the thin line of work ethic and relationship effort.Â
âIâll think about it.â
âThink about it for a long time,â Taehyung cuts in before Jimin can pop off, walking away into the living room.Â
Itâs fine. Let him figure out that you arenât a woman he can just leave. Frankly? That would tickle Jimin to no end to see Yoongi folding his plans so fast just to be with you.Â
But he spares him the tirade only because youâre fast asleep right next to him. âThank you for calling, man.â
âSaid I would.â
âI know.âÂ
Because above all else, Jimin is happy to hear that voice. Even if itâs obvious heâs a little banged up from last night, itâs still Yoongi. In one piece. Thatâs all Jimin wanted, and he canât thank you enough,
âDonât overwork yourself, and stay with her as long as you can.â
Thereâs a small laugh on the other end. âI plan on it, Chim.â
And Jimin catches on to why. âIâm holding you to that then.âÂ
â
â
Dawn breaks through open blinds, stretching its orange tint across a clean, spotless table.Â
You donât know what got you up so early. But when you peer into the kitchen, you tell yourself you woke up right on time.Â
Because seeing Yoongi when youâre wide awake is better than any dream youâll ever have.
Not because of his appearance, even though the sight of him sends a pang through your chest. No. Itâs the way heâs quietly prepping a morning meal, using the arm on his better side thatâs not sporting a nasty hit to the ribs, without you even asking.Â
Bits of sunlight dance right out of your eyes.
The effort. The consideration. This man shouldnât be lifting a finger, yet here he is cooking before you even left his bed. Isnât this the same man that got caught up in a fight hours ago? Isnât this the same man you almost walked out on with a frozen heart?Â
Yes. But heâs also the same man that loves you. And you still canât grasp that concept in any of the fingers playing with his tee you borrowed.
âHi,â you whisper, telling him a thousand things.Â
To which he regards before smiling soft, voice travelling over linoleum and circling around your heart, âMorning, doll.â
Damn. You hear it. Yoongiâs sore as hell.Â
But instead of getting into that right away, you silently take residence by his side. Because this moment feels too delicate, and you admire his willingness to take care of you unprompted. You didnât even know youâd eat before going back home.Â
With a hand warming his back, you wait until Yoongiâs done tossing food on the stove to peck his morning-chilled cheek. âThank you for cooking,â you murmur, admiring those beautiful brown eyes. âSleep okay?â
âCus of you,â your lover softly responds, eyeing your lips before gliding back up to your gaze. âYou?â
Ugh. Heâs gotta know those glasses are so unfair. Theyâve gotten you repeatedly before, and theyâre certainly getting you now.Â
But you canât help but deflate at the cuts behind those rims, while knowing there are even more bruises hiding underneath his oversized tee. How is Yoongi cooking right now? How is he even awake? âSame.âÂ
âGood.âÂ
These instant, deep shivers at his deeper morning voice will never, ever go away. But anything you wanna do about them isnât important right now. Right now, you need to make sure Yoongi is either okay, or finds a way to get better.Â
Sliding your hands down the slopes of his chest, you delicately rest one on his ribs. âDoes it still hurt?âÂ
Yikes. That wince is enough. But Yoongi doesnât shy away from your touch, and you appreciate the way he stays honest. âItâs sore. But I should be good.â
âYou gonna get it checked?â
Thereâs a slight upward tilt of his lips. âNot right now.â At least the honesty persists, as much as you donât want him following the typical manly response to hospital visits. âBut I will if you want me to.â
âPlease go,â you gently urge, lest you disturb the soft morning dew before it melts with the sunrise. âFor me?â
Only sizzles from the stove fill the space until Yoongi nods, and his voice is just as low and tender, âIâll go after work.â
Oh. âYouâre working today?â
Just like breakfast, you didnât expect this, either. Frankly, you figured neither of you were gonna even think about work, much less go. Sure, heâs due a hospital visit and you owe some friends immediate explanations for your absence. But other than that, shouldnât Yoongi be resting?Â
Does his craft truly mean that much?Â
Well, shit. You gotta respect his work ethic, thatâs for damn sure. Because you would sequester yourself to your bedroom and have endless dates with your television if you were sporting a good jab or two. This music thing must mean more to Yoongi than you previously thought. And who are you to step on that dream?Â
Suddenly, all thoughts and concerns flee from the kiss on your cheek.Â
âIâll stay if you stay,â he says, turning to move the pan and scrunching his face with a grunt. Fuck.Â
âIâŠâ Shit, you were gonna go back to the house anyway. And from Yoongiâs smartass smirk, you can tell he already knew that. âJust need to check on him, too. And he doesnât have a car right now, so. I should at least give him a ride.âÂ
âFigured.â In a move so domestic your head spins, Yoongi turns your body and gently pats your butt. âNow go sit. Letâs eat and figure this out.âÂ
â
â
As you devour a flawless meal and clean your dishes, you plan out the day. Youâll head home and check on your brother while Yoongi heads to the studio, and then youâll rendezvous with your friends to hang out until heâs done with work. Theyâre already lighting up your phone like no oneâs businessâespecially Yuri.Â
Yoongi flicks the sink off before you both head to his bedroom, and you melt at the way he slowly wraps his arms around your front halfway there, all four of your legs slowing to close the rest of the distance.Â
Whatâs he doing? This is joyfully new, but you have a pretty tight deadline. Warming his forearm and your own cheeks, you chuckle out, âWe have to hustle, old man.âÂ
âYou hustle me all the time,â he accuses into your shoulder blade, kissing its ridge and making you reconsider walking out the door entirely. âLemme have this.âÂ
Your second laugh is more subdued, and youâre right between his bed and desk when you lift both hands to hold him close. âYou have everything I got,â you wisp into his skin, planting your lips once, twice before you feel his arms press further in. âSo this is nothing.âÂ
Seconds and silence slide by, the delicate veil of early morning still hovering around the room. When Yoongi doesnât say anything, you make to turn and face him.Â
But youâre stopped before your heart skips.Â
âI could stay like this all day,â he admits, voice so low it rumbles through your bones. âAnd itâd be perfect.âÂ
âWhat, you donât wanna see my face?â You joke with a giggle. âRude, but thatâs fine.âÂ
Yoongi only buries his nose further, his glasses sliding against your skin peeking from his shirt. âIâm much braver right here, doll.âÂ
Oh.Â
The leap your heart does is more of a dive, plummeting into the seafoam swirling around your feet. All the words you want to respond with jump off right after, leaving you with nothing but the clouds in your eyes.Â
You donât quite know what he means by that. But it feels like those six words hold the weight of a thousand, so you simply let another kiss on his smooth forearm linger. âDo you want me to go with you?âÂ
A puff of laughter warms you right through and, despite his earlier admission, Yoongi does slowly spin you around.Â
And when you follow, you realize youâre much braver when you arenât facing him, too.Â
âItâs not that, babe,â he says through a dashing curve. âBut the offer was cute.âÂ
âI take it back then.âÂ
âDamn!âÂ
Both of your laughs whoosh out and collide, sweeping as Yoongi pinches your side and you flinch towards the bed. âYou fuckerâ!â
Before you know it, your back hits a comforter before a weight presses your stomach, emotions clashing as youâre elated and shy and immediately concerned for your boyfriendâs side. âBaby, be carefulââ
Lips capture yours, sucking up your warning before a hand slides under your head. Sighing, you arch into his chest, feeling the weight of his chains slip across your breasts.Â
Euphoria isnât an adequate enough word to describe how you feel. Where there used to be flutters in your ribcage now reside strong, powerful wing beats, gusts of want and desire lifting you off the ground and launching you into clear skies. Starlight of every color exists within each kiss you share, and your fingers feebly grab his tee to keep you from falling back down to earth.Â
âIf we donât go now,â Yoongi rasps before sliding his mouth against yours, âWeâre never going anywhere again.âÂ
âI know,â you whisper, willingly letting him kiss you once more, âIs that a promise?âÂ
âFuck, I wish.âÂ
You do, too. But you know youâre running out of time for what you need to do. And werenât you just saying you had to respect his aspirations? Shit, you really do need to snap out of it. âCome on,â you order with a pat to his chest. âWe have all week to do this. We got time.âÂ
Turns out, youâre still amongst the heavens. The way Yoongiâs looking at you? This is the closest youâll ever get to being held by an angel.Â
Did he get more handsome overnight? Or is it the light in his eyes sustained since his confession in the kitchen? You donât quite know, and you may never pinpoint why, but the tug he has on your heart spans space and time.Â
And youâll run through both forever to keep meeting him again and again.Â
Burns prick your eyes, but he mercifully stands before he can catch any evidence of your yearning.Â
Just like that, the two of you bounce back to getting ready, with him sliding notebooks and headphones in a backpack while you change into your own clothes. As you sling your bag over a shoulder, he reaches for the closest hoodie, and you wordlessly make your way to the front door.Â
You really do hope he gets looked at today. But just like the calm after a storm, you want to encourage him gently rather than shove him out. At least he seems receptive to your gentle suggestions.
But after you ask one more time and he simply nods, you lower your eyes to his kicks. âSorry if Iâm nagging. Iâd just worry less if you went right away, thatâs all.â
âYou arenât nagging, babe.â Your freshly bloomed lover reaches out to hold your wrist, smoothing a rough thumb over your skin. Fucking hell, you canât help but frown at the gashes and cuts marring his knuckles. âIâll go as soon as I can.â
Not just his hands, but his face. His ribs. And maybe other places you havenât even seen yet.Â
You donât wanna leave his side.Â
But you have to head out before your brother leaves. Things need to get patched up before he flies out into more stress, and you owe him an apology for walking out when he was still aching. Based on Yoongiâs physical state? Your brother could be hiding some big wounds and you didnât even wanna talk to him.Â
However. Was last night necessary? Absolutely. You cannot entertain the possible outcomes had you not tried hard enough to get through Yoongiâs door. His eyes were so dulled, his hands felt so cold. What would have happened if you didnât force yourself inside?Â
Why was that guitar smashed to pieces?Â
This is also why you refuse to leave. So many questions, so many things you still donât know. Like what all happened when you were separated? And how in the hell is this man in love with you?
âI donât wanna go,â you confess, instantly encased in his arms and warmth. âIâd much rather keep kissing you.âÂ
âTrue,â he says with a resigned huff, shifting his glasses with an adorable nose scrunch. If only he didnât have so many little red lines of conflict on his face. âBut we both have stuff to take care of, so letâs get all that done first.â
âUgh, fine.â Your groan is more teasing than serious, and Yoongiâs laugh is nothing but understanding.Â
Damn. You still feel it. You really donât wanna go. Be it the rawness of last night still on your skin, or the confessions still on your tongues, you just wanna stay by his side. âSorry,â you breathe out, lacing your fingers to pepper love along his strong, reddened ridges. âIâm serious. I donât wanna leave you right now.â
Walking out of Yoongiâs door just doesnât feel right. Even if heâs right there and will be following you out. Is this feeling normal? Are you supposed to feel this tightly woven to someone? Because the stitching between your hearts has only gotten stronger in the tempest of last night, as if you bonded together just to hold on for dear life.Â
Maybe thatâs exactly what happened. And itâs exactly why you can barely take one step out of his place.Â
âThen donât.â
Not one second passes before your chin is held, and lips slide so tenderly across yours that they may as well melt into your touch. Your reaction is quickly swooped into his mouth, and everything falls away as you let him seize your every thought. Lightning from last night zips out of your limbs, your toes, your fingers clasping his loose tee.Â
You might just cry where you stand.
How have his kisses gotten even better? How have you never felt this way even though youâve done this far more times than you were ever supposed to? It should be impossible, and yet, this man finds even more ways to astound you.Â
Yoongi slips a hand over your cheek, giving one more beautiful push of his lips as he confesses, âI donât wanna leave you, either.âÂ
And your breath stutters onto his features. âYou, too?â
Slow, he kisses your cheek, the clear rim of his specs skimming your nose. When he draws back, you look right into his eyes, wondering why heâs watching your mouth instead.Â
âMe, too.â Yoongi kisses your other side with a quiet peck. âFuck, me, too.âÂ
You fucking hate what you have to do, but you donât have a choice.Â
With one last lingering kiss, you both gather enough courage to set out and do what you must.Â
â
â
Your house is already a flurry of activity as you enter to see your brother in the kitchen, packing his leather duffle thatâs a constant companion on his trips.Â
Of course. The memory of him purchasing the lavish accessory pops into your head every time you watch him scurry around, dimples ever present on his proud cheeks. Itâs almost enough to make you smile yet again.Â
But you canât when the same face is currently scratched to hell. Just like Yoongiâs, if not worse.Â
Fuck, is he really gonna travel looking like that?Â
âHey,â he rasps out, still fighting off slumber. âYouâre back earlier than I thought.âÂ
âWanted to check on you before we left.â Fuck, your voice sounds like itâs being forced through a clogged pipe. Loosen the hell up! âAnd dude. Put some bandaids on, yeah?âÂ
âYeah, just give me a sec. Making sure I have everything before my ride gets here.âÂ
âHuh?â He got a ride? Youâre here now so you can take him to the airport. âYou sure you donât need me to drive you?âÂ
âYeah, itâs all good. I didnât know you were coming back.âÂ
Shit. His body seems just as angular as it did last night. Which, quite frankly, could still be from what went down in the lot.Â
Because even though you see both men banged up, you suddenly realize you donât actually know what all transpired.Â
After all, there wasnât much talk of it after you walked into the tempest of Yoongiâs living room.
Of course, you arenât gonna bring it up just this second. There are other things to ask about and make sure of first. âWallet? Phone? Passport?âÂ
âYup, yup, uhh.. Yup.âÂ
Zippers sling in the quiet morning air as you continue, âAnd youâre coming back on Friday, right?â
âOh.. Nah.â When you start crossing the kitchen, your brother hauls his leather bag over his better shoulder. Honestly, no one would be able to tell the other oneâs bruised with his suit on. That thing damn well covers everything except the cuts on his face and hands. âSaturday.âÂ
You pause in your journey to the medicine cabinet. âWait.. Saturday? The release partyâs on Friday.â
âYeah.. I know.â
What the fuck? Thatâs bullshit theyâre keeping him longer than they have to. Struggling to understand how corporate can keep your brother on a leash and get away with it, you urge, âTell them to at least let you go home a day early. Donât you wanna support your friends?â
âYou mean Yoongi?â
A zing of terror zips through your eyes, freezing every vein in an instant.Â
The fuck was that question? Never mind. Stay calm stay calm stay fucking calm. âUhh, yeah, heâs one of them? But the other guys, too, right? I know you care about them and this is huge.â
Mercifully, your sibling just shakes his head and waves you off. âDonât you think I already tried? I donât wanna miss it but I donât have a choice. Conference schedule is pretty tight and Iâm heading the panel on Friday.â
âIs it in the morning? You can fly out afterââ
âWhy are you fighting so hard?â
âWhy arenât you fighting harder!â
Okay, what in the hell is happening right now? Screw optics and how this must look for you, your brother needs to be there. Him and Yoongi are the tightest of friends, the most ride or die duo youâve ever seen. You canât picture a timeline where he misses this monumental moment, and itâs starting to really upset you that heâs barely trying.Â
âAlright, you know what?â Hard steps surge forward as you stand rigid, a duffle hastily dumped onto tile. âYou donât know what Iâve tried. You donât even know if I even told him yet.â
Fucking shit. You hold his stare before turning away, tossing out the idea of bandages entirely and searing footsteps into the hallwayâ
âOr do you.â
Before icing over with the unforgiving frost of zero gravity space.Â
Slow, you turn, not quite facing him but not backing down, either. ââŠExcuse me?â
âYou heard me. You talkinâ? What else has he been doing to you?â
Oh. Fuck that.Â
Doing to you?Â
Fuck all of this. This is too much to handle right now and you know youâre gonna snap if he keeps pushing because you are not having this conversation right before he leaves. Youâve already thought about this before, right? You cannot fuck with his head right before business trips because he needs to be on and locked in.Â
But now heâs fucking with your temper and those are some choice fucking words pulled out of his ass.Â
You donât think youâve ever legitimately threatened this man to his face and meant it before, and it tears a sharp corner of your heart, âYou better be very careful. With whatever you wanna say next.â
The air proves too thick to slice. While your body stands aflame, your brother is iced over, brimming with an energy that damn near takes physical form. âAll Iâm saying is? I find out some fucking bullshit is going onââ
No no no, not now.
Reacting fast is your only instinct, brain haywire and fizzling fizzling boiling. Harsh, you spin on your heel and shout the first thing you can think of, âOh, come onââ
âYou better hope to god youâre ready for whatâs comingââ
âStop!â Fuck fuck fuck, this is so frustrating because your head is exploding and your body is screaming to just tell him already. Fuck the consequences at this point this is ludicrous.Â
Doing to you? Yoongi? How dare he speak about his best friend like that how dare he accuse him without outright saying the words all you have to do is tell your brother how wrong heâs got it.Â
But you canât be the one. Yoongi said he would, and he probably took months to get to that point of strengthâand healing, from what you can tell.Â
This is between them. Them. You have to honor that, as much as you wanna just confess everything now and deal with it yourself.Â
But goddamn your brother is pulsing with anger and itâs leaking into your own charged air.Â
What does he think is happening? Does he think Yoongiâs just, what, playing you? Heâs wrong. Heâs so wrong. Yoongiâs been nothing but the best thing thatâs ever happened to you and shit your heart hurts becauseâŠ
Your brother is valid in thinking that.Â
How foolish. Didnât you guard your heart from Yoongi for the longest? Didnât everything start because you figured you knew who he was because of his reputation? You got him all wrong, too. So how can you be mad at your brother for doing the same?Â
Fuck, think. Just think before someone gets hurt.Â
Because if you arenât careful, someoneâor multiple someonesâwill get hurt in seconds. You have to bear the pain alone right now. To protect them both, you have to keep your trembling mouth shut.Â
And? You have to admit that something isnât fair here. Not to you, not to Yoongi, but to him. Last night was rough as fuck but, while you both got to have raw, beautiful closure, the one standing in front of you had to go to sleep in an empty house.Â
So chill the fuck out.Â
Breathing to cool down, you tense and loosen, tense and loosen. âI get it. Youâre angry, and you have a lot going on. But,â you bite down on your lip to keep going. âWeâre talking about something else. Weâre talking about you, and Iâm still pissed you even let those guys goad you into a fight. What are we, twelve?â
Seething, your sibling takes the switch of pace. But it is not what you want to hear. âAre you seriâ? What the hell was I supposed to do? That son of a bitch grabbed youââ
âI know,â you recoil. âDonât tell me like you were there, because you werenât.â
Finallyâfinallyâthose angry lines in his face vanish.Â
But they make way for something much worse than anger. Because your older brother, someone thatâs been there for you your whole life..Â
Looks absolutely stricken over the one time he wasnât.Â
Damn it.Â
Regretful, you drop your shoulders in exhaustion and quiet compromise. When you continue, your voice is much softer, âBut I told you: they were. Your friends, they were there because they knew you wanted that. Jimin got me away, Yoongi took me home and stayed.âÂ
You really have got to stop saying his name like you love him. It could start becoming too obvious.Â
Shuddering, you shift your weight, folding your arms and shrinking into yourself.Â
That night, despite Yoongiâs best and most gentle efforts, still clings to where that loser touched you at Dalo. You hate that you havenât gotten over it, and you loathe the way you still rub over the same spot. Over, and over. âWhat did you want him to do? Leave me here?â
âNo.âÂ
âExactly. And he didnât.â You adjust your stance again, making an impromptu gamble as you decide to let some truth leak out. Because your brother is owed at least this much. âAnd fine, you wanna know something? We do talk more because of it.â
Your brotherâs head snaps up, and you brace. Because if you show any shred of weakness or hesitation, heâll see right through your weak attempt to hide most of the truth,Â
âBut donât ever accuse him of doing anything to me. That was fucked up to say and you know it.â
âFuck.â In agreement, he rubs his hair back. âIt was. Iâm sorry.âÂ
âTrust me,â you swallow, hating that this is how things have to be for now. âYou have nothing to worry about. Heâs never.. Never done anything to me, anyway.âÂ
Itâs not a lie. Everything heâs done has been with you. For you. Because of you.Â
But your heartâs in anguish as it sinks. Because that expression on your older siblingâs face can only be one thing. Â
Pure. Utter. Relief.
Fire singes your eyes before you can quell the flame. Itâs the hardest technical truth to swallow.Â
Sure, he doesnât have anything to worry about as far as you being safe. And on top of that, he doesnât have to worry about any fake shit because Yoongi confessed to you last night.
But as far as his best friend sleeping with and now dating his sister behind his back? That is still very much sitting right in the center of the table.Â
And now youâre starting to see just how fucked all three of you are as soon as you sit down to eat the truth.Â
But Yoongi said heâd be the one to tell, so he will.Â
This feeling is so fucking miserable, though.Â
In the end, your brother is effectively convinced, raking a hand across his head and sighing. âJimin told me what all went down at Dalo, I just⊠Last night was⊠Fucked up.âÂ
âWell, yeah.â
âNo. See, this is just like what you said to me. You canât say it like you were there.â
Itâs your stomachâs turn to twist. âSo? You were scratched and bruised to hell, and YâŠâ Shut up, shut up. Youâre not supposed to know about the state of anyone else. âAnd you were⊠quieter.â
âBecause of what happened, dude.â
You blink. âWhat⊠What happened?â
Your brother looks at youâreally looks at you.Â
And suddenly, your gut flares in terror, storming in an instant across your abdomen.Â
âThat bitch pulled something on us.â
Your heart.Â
Itâs in freefall.
âWait⊠What?â You canât even form more than one syllable at a time, your legs turning gelatinous and knees starting to give out. âNo⊠What are youâŠ?â
What the fuck did he just say? That bitch pulled a what?Â
Your sibling slowly walks toward you once again, watching like heâs just waiting for you to say anything. Do anything.Â
But youâre a complete statue because all you can think about is the horror of something happening and the relief that nothing happened all at once.Â
Was Yoongi too scared to mention that part? Is this why he was holding back and shaking every time he reached out to touch you? Even this morning, he was soâŠÂ
Youâve never seen him like that. Is this why?Â
Your mind is swirling and crashing, overlapping each passing thought and scream running through your head. âIâm so sorry,â you hitch out, âI didnât know. Why didnât you say anything?â
âDidnât wanna scare you,â he sighs out. Putting both hands on his hips, your brother stops feet away, visibly still shook as he pierces wooden planks with his stare. âBut he pulled it right before Yoongi⊠and if it werenâtâŠFuck.âÂ
Burns flare and slice through your eyes when he has to pause. What is he trying to say? Pulled what?Â
Before Yoongi what?Â
Your brother continues, and your throat tightens. âIf it werenât for some random ass sirens, I⊠Things couldâve been so different.âÂ
What the fuck is happening. What the hell are you hearing?Â
âIt was probably dumb as fuck. But I was so fucking angry,â he grits out, watery eyes crushed looking your way. âSo fucking mad at how he was talking about you, I.. Walked right up to him and told him to fuck off.â
You canât even breathe.Â
âI still feel it,â he quietly adds, fingers pressed against his side. âRight here.âÂ
âFuck,â you finally choke out, eyes on fucking fire.Â
âBut all I knew was to keep you all safe,â he says, with hardened resolve and a wobbly chin. âAnd thatâs exactly what I did. I did that shit, even if that meantââÂ
Tears fling out of your eyes, flowing hot down your cheeks because you wouldnât want any of them to go out that way. Nothing happened nothing happened nothing happened and yet your body is acting as if something did and it hurts.Â
Your brother is there as soon as you crumple forward, letting you bury your head in his chest and sob your heart out. For him, for his friends, and for all the time you had with the man you love so, so dearly.Â
If anything happened to your brother before you came clean⊠If anything happened before you and Yoongi could evenâŠÂ
Suddenly, you feel equal weights of guilt. For running out on your brother. And for almost walking out on Yoongi.Â
You decide an apology is in order for both of them, and all the understanding in the world for Yoongiâs frosted demeanor as soon as you get him alone again.
And you are one hundred percent going to tell your brother everything once heâs back.Â
The tears cannot stop, and youâre sure you are crying unimpeded in a pressed and primmed suit. âIâm so sorry,â you keep repenting like a prayer. âThis is all my fault.â
âNoââ
âYou almostââ
âHey, stop.â He yanks you back, both of your faces soaked with saltwater. âWhat did I say before? I threw the first swing. You didnât do anything wrong.â
âBut it led to all this, I just.. I just feel so fucking stupid.â
âDonât. Hey, look at me.â Firm but gentle, he holds you at armâs length, forcing you to face him. âMaybe weâre both stupid, but you werenât the idiot. I was.âÂ
You feel so many conflicting things in your soul.Â
What would you have done if Yoongi was in critical condition? What would you have done differently if your brother was instead? Are they the same? Are the two situations really so different anymore?Â
No they arenât they arenât they arenât.Â
âPlease donât do that again,â you shake out. âEven if it was for me, if I ever lost you, I...âÂ
âYou know I canât promise anything.â He furrows his brows when you eye him with anger and sadness. âBut nothing like that is happening again. Especially with the same dudes.âÂ
âOkay.âÂ
A vicious tornado of emotions sends your whole body into agonizing pain. This isnât what you expected at all, and itâs causing your limbs to lock at the bends. Too many scenarios are jangling about yet you canât ask for specifics because that will just make it even more real.Â
A nightmare is somehow better once you know it ends with you waking up. âIâm⊠gonna need some time to process everything.â
âI know. And I wasnât planning on saying anything, but⊠You deserve to know the things I get into.âÂ
Ah.Â
The irony is not lost on you.Â
âAt least, if they involve you. We learned our lesson. You were right to tell us off.â
God. You feel numb.Â
âThanks,â you murmur, suddenly immensely tired. âI think I need more sleep.â
A blaring honk sounds outside the house, and you both flinch at the noise.Â
And your throat burns at the way your brother instinctively swept you behind his back.Â
When you realize what it is, you know what has to come next.Â
And heâs the first to react as he turns to face you again, âAlright. Iâm heading out, just remember to go get my baby when sheâs fixed, yeah?â
âDo you have to go?â
Wait.
The question seems to startle him as much as it does you.Â
How did you blurt it right out before even registering the words? Why does your heart clench at the sight of those eyes looking so pained?Â
Why does everything feel so shaky within these walls that were always your home?
âI do,â he says, voice tight. âIâm sorry.âÂ
And why the fuck do you feel sad heâs leaving?
âNo, no, itâs.. Of course you have to.â You canât help the lump in your throat from bobbing, the regret in your limbs as they barely move at your side. âI dunno why I asked, I guess I just..âÂ
Thereâs no response to your sniffle.Â
âSorry for yelling,â you squeak out. âI just feel really queasy.â
For a lot more reasons than one.
âWe all made it out,â your brother whispers. âThatâs what matters.â
âWill you⊠Will you at least try to be back for the party?â
The man swallows with his brows knit tight, then attempts to crack the tiniest smile. âYou know I will. Thatâs my guy.âÂ
âOkay.â You nod, sniffling again. After what he just told you? You know heâll do anything for the ones he loves. âSee you there.â
Your brother rubs a comforting palm over your head before turning, heading for the door and grabbing his leather duffle.Â
When he stops to glance at you one more time, you give a little wave of your hand before watching the door click shut.Â
Chest caving as you collapse to the ground in tears.Â
â
â
The need to call Yoongi burns so harshly your fingers damn near set your top aflame.
But heâs at work, and you canât fuck things up right when youâre approaching the finish line. You almost did with your brother, and that gave you twelve heart attacks in the span of minutes.Â
Still. Your chest aches so much that a thirteenth could very well be approaching. You donât even realize youâre bracing the hallway wall for support until you try to stand, back sore and aching from bending so far for so long.Â
What did your brother mean to say about Yoongi? What did that coward pull on them? Do you even want to know what happened?Â
Fighting back tears, you reach down for your phone, shakily typing out a message only to erase it. Then again. And again.Â
And again.Â
Giving up, you forcefully swallow all your worries, cringing at the bitterness of the unknown and the burnt molasses of hidden truths.Â
Itâs going to be okay. No matter what you think or imagine in your head, they made it out, they made it out, they are all alive.Â
Thatâs the only reason you can move forward, each step getting you from your room. To your bathroom.Â
And back again.Â
â
â
After showering, you feel lighter and refreshed, though the soreness between your legs has yet to leave.Â
But you wouldnât want it any other way, as itâs another reminder of Yoongiâs apparent brush with survival. His broken living room spurned the creation of your bond, your devotion to him as he confessed before you gave him your utmost trust in his sheets.Â
The end is so close. As soon as this week is over, youâll rip the last bit of peel from your pair of tangerines, baring all truths to your brother and facing the consequences.Â
Finally ready, you head to your car, opening your text threads with a plan: start slow.Â
Start with something that can be interpreted neutrally if anyone saw it on his phone screen, especially if your headstrong ex is in the room.Â
You [12:31pm]: how are you feeling?
Yoongi [12:34pm]: 1 AttachmentÂ
You close your door with brows furrowed.Â
Yoongiâs at the hospital?Â
Thatâs not what you expected at all.Â
Your chest swells with relief knowing heâs there, but you also wanna make sure heâs feeling okay. Especially his mental state after whatever the fuck your brother just dropped on you before leaving.Â
Goddamn, thatâs going to gnaw at your brain until you find the right time and right amount of courage to ask about it. Because itâs very possible Yoongi wonât tell you.Â
Because itâs probably something he knows you wonât like.Â
Fuck.Â
You [12:34pm]: Loved an Attachment
You [12:34pm]: thank you for listeningđ€ still sore?
Yoongi [12:35pm]: Yeah, but not bad. Just there.
Wait. Heâs not at the studio. That means you canâ
Yoongi: Outgoing Call
âHey.â
âHey,â you slowly say as you pull out into the street. âIâm driving now so this is easier.â
âCourse. You going to Taeâs?â
âMaybe. Iâm going to Yuriâs first.â You swallow, realizing that you didnât tell him about what you let slip before driving over. âI.. Told her. About you.â
Thereâs a little bit of silence on the line, just some adjustments and muffled speaker sounds. âSorry, just writing this down. Whatâs wrong with that?â
You huff through your nose. Gotta be those patient forms that always take forever to fill out. âOh. Just more and more people knowing, is all.âÂ
âEveryoneâs gonna know eventually.âÂ
You hold back a small smile. Because heâs right. âYeah. Iâm just tired of this feeling.â
âLike youâre hiding something.â
Itâs your turn for silence. He doesnât know how accurately that was played out today. The only answer you can provide is a curt, âExactly.â
âSame.â
Wings beat around your heart again.Â
He wants this. Yoongi really, really wants this. And years ago, that outcome wouldnât have even crossed your mind as an option.Â
âThank you for going, baby.â
âThe guys made me.â
You hum. âWhich ones.â
After a pause, you hear a puff of amusement. âAll of them at some point today, actually.âÂ
All of them? Does that include your brother? Did they talk about the trip already?
Your laugh is bittersweet. âWell. Glad to know you can be forced by everyone else except me.â
âHey, I was already gonna go because of you!â Yoongi quietly retorts, and you giggle at the pout in his words. âJust wanted to get a headstart on work first.â
You were right. He really does wanna go all out for his musical endeavors.Â
Itâs extremely admirable, and wildly attractive, but it does come to a point. âAs much as I love your passion, old man, I wanna keep you upright.â
He laughs soft into the line, and you think you can listen to that specific sound on an infinite loop. âThatâs fair.âÂ
âHow long is it gonna take, you think?â
âDunno. But Iâll keep myself busy until Iâm out.â
Of course he will. You donât doubt he wonât waste any time. Didnât he bring journals in his backpack? You wouldnât be surprised if he wrote ten thousand songs before being called in. âJust call me if you need anything, please?â
âOf course, babe.â
âThank you,â you say with utmost sincerity. âIf only my brother would be less stubborn and get checked, too.â
âHeâll probably do it once he gets there.â
âDid you convince him?â
âNah. But once he knows I did, heâll do it.â
âFigures.â You scoff. âOkay, Iâm almost there. Let me know how it goes.â
âK. Bye, doll.â
You didnât ask him what went down. But itâs not the time nor place, and you have plenty of chances this week to figure out when that would beâif at all.Â
âTalk soon.âÂ
â
â
For a normally bustling household, Yuriâs house is quiet.Â
So itâs not shocking when you walk into the kitchen and see all your friends glance your way, slowly vacating their chairs with eyes never leaving your face. Even Reia is on high alert.Â
Did Yuri tell her? Did Yuri tell anyone else?Â
No. Sheâs a talker and loves spilling, but she promised. And when she promises something, you know you can trust her to keep it.Â
Itâs what pours emotion in your voice as you meekly greet, âHey, guysââ
A crushing hug closes your throat. Yuriâs the one that gets to you first, with Reia and Dominique waiting their turns to offer you healing, relieved embraces.Â
âWhat happened?âÂ
âScared us half to death.â
Dom puts you at armâs length to give a once over, noting your face rubbed raw and eyes still a little bloodshot. Thankfully, her pupils hold more concern than disappointment. âYou good?â
Your eyes wobble alongside your smile, and you think itâs enough proof. âMore than that,â you still decide to whisper, and your heart beats again at her reaction.Â
âThank god. I was ready to kick your ass if you werenât.â
Heading up to Yuriâs room, you all wait until the door is swung back before mounting her canopy bed, sitting in a tight circle as you divulge everything.Â
Well. Almost everything.Â
You tell them that Yoongi is the one youâve been seeing, how you went to check on him last night in a panic, and the terrifying reason why. When you mention the fight after the basketball game, all three of your friends erupt in questions, and you have to assure them everything turned out okay. Honestly, you also do this to assure yourself, too.Â
âSo⊠Your brotherâs just fine with all of this?â Reia asks, not noticing the tick of Domâs jaw.Â
âWell,â you start with a higher pitch, earning a pair of groans. âHe doesnât exactly know yetââ
âYup. Heâs gonna murder him.â
âYeah, should we say our condolences now or..â
âHow long has this been going on?â Reia fires off another question that digs into your chest. âWas he the one you were seeing the whole time?â
âYes,â you admit with a sigh. âI shouldâve told you guys from the beginning, but. The whole thing just felt so delicate. But! We just started making things official recently, so..âÂ
Dom turns your way. âOfficial how?â
Well. Here goes everything.Â
With a shaky breath, and lingering feelings from the time it happened, you reveal with watery eyes, âYoongi⊠Told me he loves me.â
Both Yuri and Reia react in yelps, Domâs gaze lowering as the girls reach to grab your hands.Â
Wait. Whatâs going on with her? Sheâs the one that knows the most, sheâs the one that covered for you all those months ago. She has to be the one that is the least surprised at all this.Â
Blinking, you note to confront her about it later. Right now, youâre too focused on trying not to cry as your friends tumble out questions and support,Â
âHe said it? Did you say it first or did he?âÂ
âHow did it happen! Oh, Iâm so happy for you, babeââÂ
âThankâthank you, Yuri,â you squeeze out as she hugs you close. âI couldnât believe it, but he just.. Said it. We werenât even doing anything, I was just.. Looking up what injuries he could have..âÂ
And he confessed in the most Yoongi fashion he could have.Â
Looking back, it shouldnât shock you at all. Heâs always found ways to sweep you off your proverbial feet, so why would a confession plucked from the heavens be any different?Â
She lets you go before wiping her eyes, Reia and even Dom now sporting watery pupils, too.Â
âAs much as Iâm upset at you for not telling us, Iâve never been so happy for you.â When Yuriâs features crease in another sob, you sniffle along with the rest. âItâs been so long since you⊠And you really.. Fuck.âÂ
You know what sheâs trying to say, and the realization has your throat constricting so tight.Â
Itâs been forever since youâve had something like this, someone like this. When you and Jungkook were together, you told him that you loved him before he broke it off.Â
Sure, you bought the rings together, but he never uttered those words until years after when it didnât even matter. And all your relationships after his were complete and utter bullshit, so you donât think you ever even heard those three words and knew them to be true.Â
Yoongi was the first to ever say them so sincerely.Â
And that fact makes your ducts burn and burn.Â
And when Yuri finally speaks, it breaks the dam holding your real deluge back,Â
âI canât think of anyone else that deserves to be loved more than you.âÂ
All at once, everything streams out as you hunch forward. The pain of everything youâve endured, the hopelessness of knowing youâd most likely end up alone, the excruciating prospect of a future that you never deemed bright, or peaceful, or comforting.Â
And to think that even this man couldâve been snatched away from you in a snap? Even more tears overlap with the ones youâre shedding, and you canât even reach out to hug all three beautiful, angelic souls surrounding you with tight arms and sobs because your limbs lock at all bends.Â
Itâs the exact release you need. All your friends supporting you, all the pent up anxiety of last night and today, the truth setting itself free in some capacityâall in the comfort of a plushie-laden bed you only doubted yourself in last time.Â
Everythingâs gonna be alright. It has to be. Youâre gonna fight for the ones you love, even if a war between them is inevitable.Â
It takes a few minutes of heavy silence for you all to separate, swiping and rubbing tears while letting out happy sniffles.Â
When you thank them for being understanding, they assure you itâs okay. And when you say youâre going to tell your brother soon, a force from the doorway has all of you leaping from lilac sheets,Â
âTell him what?âÂ
Jia stands firm with a laundry basket at her hip, and Yuri scoffs at her older sister for barging in. âA knock wouldâve been nice!âÂ
Fuck!Â
You canât tell Jia of all people. If you spill anything about Yoongi, sheâs one hundred percent going to tell your brother. Theyâre the same age, and run in pretty tight circles, so of course you are not going to risk it.Â
But you can tell her something else youâre going to tell your older sibling, so you fire out a half-truth,Â
âTell him not to pick any other fights that could get him killed.âÂ
Jiaâs eyes zoom to your wrecked face, and she drops the laundry with haste before asking, âWhat happened? When? Tell me now.âÂ
Huh. Maybe your brother has a type, if heâs still into Jia like he said before.Â
You feel a little spark in your chest as you let her know they all got in a scuffle after the basketball game, and another pang as she immediately abandons the room and clothes with a fierce declaration,Â
âIâm gonna kill them myself!âÂ
âDonât worry, I already hounded my brother!â You call out after her, sighing as Yuri shakes her head with a smile. âShe gets like that when sheâs really worried, huh.âÂ
âYeah..â Your friend leans to look around you, noticing the basket left alone on the ground. âAnd if sheâs super fired up, she drops everything and doesnât stop until itâs handled. Clearly.âÂ
Maybe both older siblings really are similar.Â
The firestorm of an interruption seemed to break the tension in the room, with all of you finally relaxing and catching up. When they ask you questions, you answer what you can.Â
And when you divulge information that has your ears burning, their squeals and yells give you whole new reasons to live.Â
â
â
After a very comforting lunch Yuriâs mom cooked, you head to the bathroom when your phone suddenly vibrates through your palm.
Huh? Thatâs weird. You expect the name on your screen to be Taehyung, not Yoongi.Â
Not that itâs a bad thing. Youâve been waiting to hear from him, so this is a pleasant surprise.Â
Closing the door to the guest bathroom, you gaze at the calming sage decor with a smile. âHi, how did itââ
âYouâre coming over later, right?â
Oh, shit. Is he okay?
âYes, baby,â you respond with a soothing lilt, ears perked and body on high alert.Â
Does he think you arenât anymore? You both decided on the plans earlier. Surely he knows youâd never just flake on him. âIâm coming back once youâre done with work, remember?â
Thereâs an uncomfortable pause on the line, which makes your boyfriendâs next question jab you so far in the lungs you canât breathe,
ââŠCan it be now?â
Shit.Â
Just like Jia earlier, you drop every plan you have to the wayside. Youâre sure that Taehyung will understand, and you already got through the biggest conversation you needed to with your friends.Â
âOf course,â you whoosh out. âLemme just say bye and Iâll go.âÂ
âTake your time.â A small shuffling interrupts. âItâll take me a bit to get back.âÂ
âOkay. See you there.âÂ
The strained urgency in his voice makes your hair stand on end, so you vacate the bathroom to inform the girls that you gotta goâbut not without a quick head tilt towards Dom, who follows you outside and into the afternoon sun. Â
â
â
You wait until youâre next to your car on the street, turning with a concerned expression and jittery nerves, âWhatâs up with you? Did I do something wrong?â
Turns out, you read Dominique correctly. Her jaw locks before loosening, and it reminds you of the time she confronted you about Yoongi before. God, how much has changed since then. That feels like ages and ages ago.Â
âItâs not about you,â your best friend clears the air and the tightness in your shoulders. âIâm just.. Glad he came around.â
âYoongi?â When Dom nods, you blink. âWait, what?â
âAt your house that night.. After he left your room, we hadâI dunno, a heart-to-heart.â She sighs, flicking braids over her shoulder. You note to compliment the beads she chose this time, because they remind you of summer and simpler times. âI mightâve pressured him a bit, and.. I think he wanted to tell me that he loved you. All the way back then.âÂ
Something in your heart stutters, and you can only repeat your last question, âWhat?â
âYeah. Something about needing to do something first,â she continues, holding your gaze with perfect brows furrowed in sunlight. âBut I could tell he was damn serious about whatever it was. And if he was willing to do it for you? I let it go.âÂ
Your mind whirls.Â
Yoongi was already in love with you back then? Is that why he needed to let you go? To deal with whatever he had to do?Â
One side of you breaks thinking he had to go through all that alone; the other side is screaming at his past self for not even giving you a choice. What did he go through? What did he have to do?
Now you really have to see him. Immediately.Â
âThank you, Dom,â you rush out while opening your door. âIâm just happy itâs over.â
âThe hell itâs not.â Shooting you a glare that heats the oncoming breeze, she reminds, âItâs not over until your brother knows. And based on everything thatâs happened? That conversation is not gonna go over well.âÂ
A dark, simmering boil starts in your stomach, and youâre already feeling queasy again. Tightening your door handle, you gulp hard. âI know.âÂ
âTrust me, Iâm happy for you both. I am.â Both hands find her hips as she levels a gaze that you really, really donât enjoy. âBut Iâm gonna be honest, I think this is gonna ruin their friendship for good.âÂ
Both of your lungs clamp shut.Â
âPlease donât say that,â you beg, âIâm gonna fight for all of us. I will.âÂ
âI donât doubt that, babe. Hey, uh uh, come here.â Reaching out, she gives you a tight hug just when you feel fragile again.Â
âListen to me. I donât doubt that,â she says into your shoulder. âIâm just here to be realistic. Just donât be shocked if thatâs how it goes. Weâll be here for you no matter what, too.âÂ
âOkay,â you say with a scrunched face into her scent. God, she always smells so good, and itâs almost enough to calm you down. Almost almost almost. âThank you. But Iâm not giving up.âÂ
âThatâs my girl.â She squeezes you one more time. âI love you.âÂ
With eyes searing over, you choke and grip her tighter. âI love you, too.âÂ
â
â
Yoongiâs door warms your back as you wait for him to show.Â
But thereâs a good chance it can just be your volcanic anxiety.Â
Ever since your arrival, youâve paced, youâve gnawed on your lips, youâve had to shake the nerves out of your hands.Â
And over and over, youâve strained your neck to look for your favorite cat, because you could sincerely use even a glimpse of her right now.Â
While she doesnât end up showing, Yoongi rounds the nearest corner minutes after your last desperate scan.Â
Fuck, heâs so handsome.Â
Even now, as he simply walks toward you with a backpack slung over his shoulder, you watch with undying yearning to feel those flowing bangs over his forehead. Youâd even settle for a single touch of his cheeks, one of them currently sporting a thin bandage.
But the closer Yoongi gets, the quicker your admiration morphs into concern. Thereâs a deep bend in his brows that you canât decipher, and his fist is balled pretty tight.Â
Seriously, what happened? He looks so troubled that you slowly push off the doorway to ask,Â
âBaby, whatâsââ
A bag hits the ground before youâre swooped into a kiss so electric your lips spark.Â
Him. Him, him, and more him. For the love of everything you donât understand whatâs happening but you kiss Yoongi back with everything you have, arms slinging around his strong shoulders and tugging him closer because he clearly needed this.Â
And fuck if you didnât need it just as much. Screw it if anyone sees you. This is all you want and youâll stay right here until he pulls away.Â
When he finally does, both of you swallow to catch your breaths, and your soul glimmers when his forehead meets yours.Â
âHi, baby,â you whisper to his exhales. âMissed you, too.â
Silent, your lover kisses your forehead before hugging you close, and youâre more sure of your prediction than ever. Something is bothering him.Â
He doesnât look worse, at least. But thereâs clearly something off and heâs not hiding it. His lack of words is loud enough.Â
âLetâs go inside,â you quietly suggest. âI wouldâve gone in already but I donât have a key.â
He nods, fishing out his keyring to let you both inside.Â
When you set your bags down and slip off your shoes, itâs only seconds before youâre softly pulled into a hug again, surprising yet so, so welcoming.Â
Even only after a few hours, youâve missed the fuck out of him. Which makes all of this an outright dream.Â
âSorry,â Yoongi finally murmurs against your shoulder. âI justâŠâ
âNothing to be sorry for.â You stroke a hand along his hair, massaging his scalp and loving how soft it feels. The windswept strands fall back into place as you keep running your fingers through. âDid you at least get your appointment?â
âYeah, I did.â He buries his face further. âNothing bad. Just canât lift anything heavy for a couple days.â
âGood. Thatâs easy to manage,â you whisper back into his tee, feeling the chill of lingering air conditioning and body warmth all at once. âIs something else bothering you?â
âNot exactly.â Whatever that means. âIâll tell you about it later. Just wanted this, and you.â
Oh. ThatâsâŠÂ
âIâm here now, love,â you assure with a melting heart, wondering what happened to cause this behavior.Â
Is it because of last night? Or something that happened today? Youâre anxious all over again, but from the way Yoongiâs acting, your worries are second to his. âHave you eaten yet?â
He shakes his head, only pulling you closer with not a word from his lips.Â
And from this point on, you make a silent vow to yourself. Whatever Yoongi needs, youâre going to take care of him.Â
No matter what, these next few days are all about himâa minuscule sacrifice in comparison to everything heâs done for you, whether you knew about it or not.
âIâll make you something then. Come on.âÂ
When you walk, you slip your hand down his arm to hold his hand, and your lead into his kitchen is short.Â
âAny requests?â You cheerfully ask as you spare a smile over your shoulder. âWe can do⊠Something lightâŠâ
Only to see him staring back with nothing but a lingering sense of longing.
Okay.Â
You need to get to the bottom of this now.Â
Stopping right over linoleum, you leave no room for arguments, âYoongi. Tell me whatâs wrong.â
He blinks before his gaze meets the floor. So youâre confused when he simply, quietly..Â
Laughs?Â
âItâs not that somethingâs wrong,â he slowly starts, a shy smile carving his features. âFor the first time in my life, nothingâs wrong.âÂ
Your heart beats extra loud.Â
âBut itâs too much to explain right now.â His eyes rise to meet yours. âJust know that Iâm so in love with you.âÂ
Oh.
âAnd I want you to know that every day I live.â
Fuck.
Your body responds before you can say anything, lips connecting to remove any need for speech. The knowledge of them all staring death in the face last night makes this confession sear your insides, and you canât help but kiss him like youâll never get to again.Â
Yanking him back, you spin on your heel until he flings into the kitchen, clutching your wrists before gripping your jaw with both hands.Â
His mouth heats on yours, his glasses the only barrier between your skin. Everything sizzles from your head to your toes, and you both bang into a countertop beforeâ
âFuck, ouch.â
âShit, you okay?â
Yoongi rubs his side with one eye pinched shut, a corner of his teeth present. âYeah. Worth it, though.â
âBe serious,â you reprimand. Looks like heâs gonna have to take it easy, which means no going at it like animals until heâs on the mend. âNo more until you feel better, yeah?â
âSays who?â
âBabe.â
His deadly pout almost breaks your resolve. âFine.âÂ
But you can wait. Youâre sure it wonât take long, and for this man? Youâll wait however long you need to.Â
Besides, thereâs plenty of things you can do in the meantime that donât require running into hard objects.Â
âGood. Now letâsâŠâ You turn away to get started before youâre held, and pulled back into yet another embrace.Â
What the hell is happening today? Your lungs and your melting pile of a brain can only take so much. Itâs beautifully overwhelming how Yoongi canât seem to let you go, because youâre the one that always loses control.Â
This whole time, itâs been you that canât hold yourself back.Â
So now? Being on the other side? You donât think you ever want him to restrain himself again.Â
This time, he moves slow. Sensuously slow, and it would occur to you that heâs finding a very cheeky loophole to your plan if you werenât so hazy-eyed.Â
Whatever Yoongiâs doing, you wonât stop him.Â
Your back touches a counter before Yoongi cages you in, and your lips mold together as perfectly as his body does with yours. Your unhurried strokes match his, and your minds communicate without a single word.Â
Thereâs yearning still ever present. But thereâs comfort in abundance, and a whole new level of need.Â
After he pulls away, you can visibly see him drink you in from head to toe.Â
âYou know.. Iâm good holding off on all the other shit.â Pulling you in, his lips curve as he confidently declares, âBut Iâm never gonna stop kissing you.âÂ
His hands, his lips, his words. They all have healing powers, youâre so sure of it. If Yoongi hasnât yet realized his unending pain has blossomed into a safe haven, you need to let him know no matter what,Â
âGood.â
Thereâs still a pining in his eyes, but he lets you free, hand skirting your hip before he walks to his room. âGonna change then Iâll help.âÂ
âYou donât have to, baby,â you say as you struggle to catch your breath. âI got it.âÂ
Three minutes later, heâs chopping an onion anyway.Â
But youâre loving how serene everything feels with the two of you prepping and dicing, thumps of knives on wood intertwining in sound before you laugh at his crying over the pesky vegetable. Maybe if he wore contacts instead of specs, heâd be better off.Â
Not that his choice of eyewear is what youâre complaining about. But those glasses paired with the cream tees heâs been wearing? There will be hell to pay as soon as you get a chance at revenge.Â
Your pot is set to boil for a bit, so you finally rest against the counter and start a timer on his microwave. âGo ahead,â you gesture to your very handsome cooking partner. âYou can sit now.â
âHuh? Weâre not done yet.â
âOh.â Blinking, you tilt your head in confusion because you couldâve sworn you heard him yawn a couple times. âYou arenât tired?â
âI am,â he says before squeezing his eyes, rapid blinks to follow. âBut Iâm fine here.â
You toss and turn the food around, sprinkling a little more seasoning and hearing the bubbles and fizzes. When you stir a little more, a sudden thought occurs, halting your movements and spinning you around,Â
âAre you staying there to watch my ass.â
Yoongiâs slow smile gives everything away, but he also makes up for the blatant staring.Â
âCanât deny thatâs one of the things.â Pushing off the sink, he stands right next to you, slotting a hand behind your neck and angling you for a kiss. âBut I meant it earlier. I justâŠâ
Youâre completely silent as you watch him slide his eyes from your face to the sizzling food. Whatever heâs thinking about, youâre gonna give him all the room to talk.Â
âJust like being where you are.âÂ
How you went from almost running out of his door to here, you arenât quite sure. But youâre grateful for that split second of him deciding to fight for the two of you instead of against, because you really were going to leave.Â
And you may have taken much, much longer to even try going back.Â
Your voice is barely heard over the aromatic smell and fizzle, âGood thing I like having you around.â When he smiles again, you let out a breath of a giggle, going back to shuffling the pan around and tilting your head to the fridge. âI put some fruit in there if you wanna eat that, too.â
âIâm down.â
âK.â
Your food is ready soon enough, and the two of you eat while talking about easy topics. Like work and your workplace dynamics, what Yoongiâs team has been working on at the studio.Â
At one point, your curiosity about the album release party grows from something he says. âSpeaking of. The partyâs on Friday, right?â
âYeah.â
âOkay, I thought so,â you deflate, setting your bowl down on the table. âSorry he canât go.â
âHuh?â
Your body stills. âWait. Did he not say anything? About his trip being extended?â
So much for nothing in his life being wrong. From the lost look on his face, you may have given him another reason to fold back in on himself. âNo.. No, he didnât.â
Both of you sit in silence.Â
This could be nothing. Right? That means your brother is confident he can make it so thereâs no point in telling Yoongi heâs gonna miss it. Or maybe heâs not trying hard enough and then not being able to say it to his face?Â
âIâm sorry,â you apologize. âI thought he told you.â
âItâs okay.â Clearly itâs not. âNot much to do about it now.â
âYoongi⊠What if he knows?â At your own question, you stiffen, curling into a proverbial ball. Fear and the sick backfire of fibbing has your mouth going drier than desert air. âWhat if he actually knows?â
Setting down his chopsticks, Yoongi looks your way, eyes unreadable behind his specs. âIf he did, do you think heâd leave us alone?â
Heâs got a point. âGuess not.âÂ
âMm.â Flicking his eyes to the window, he adjusts uncomfortably in his chair. âAnd I dunno if I mentioned this, but.. He thinks I got back with my ex.â
âFuck, really?âÂ
âThatâs the real reason why he hasnât been talking to me. Maybe he thinks sheâs gonna be there on Friday.â
âOh.â Your shoulders sag, and sag. Not owning up to your relationship is one thing; Yoongi having to dwell in his previous relationship is another. âIs that⊠worse?â
âShit.â Reaching across wood, you close your hand around his fingers for support. Itâs the only thing you can think to do. At least, itâs what you would want if you were in his shoes. âI think you should tell him she wonât be.â
A million seconds later, Yoongi thankfully agrees. âYeah, I will.â
You feel better. Somewhat. At least a little less nauseous about the possibility of your brother knowing.Â
But it still sucks knowing that heâs actively avoiding Yoongi because of an ex he used to have.Â
How bad was it back then if this is the case? What exactly happened? Is this why Yoongi went radio silent on you for weeks?
It seems like he doesnât even wanna talk about her. So you wonât pry just yet, as much as you wanna know every single thing sheâs done wrong so you can hound her through every timeline in existence.Â
Instead, you talk about a much better subject,Â
âWe should feed my cat now.â
And you quickly laugh at the saucy glint in Yoongiâs eyes.Â
â
â
Everything is set where it needs to be. Sugarâs food and water fill their respective bowls, your shoulder leans into Yoongiâs good side, and his arm rests around your back as heâs propped up by his banged up doorway.Â
You remember the first time you saw him lean against the wood like this. Only that time, you were a shell of a girl, waiting with shaky breaths and shaken confidence to hear his response to your inappropriate request.Â
Who wouldâve thought that youâd be on the same side as him all these months later? In his arms, resting a head on his warm chest?Â
When you let out a short chuckle, Yoongi turns to your smile. âHmm?âÂ
âNothing,â you wisp out. âJust thinking about us.âÂ
His fingers press into your side a fraction more, and you can feel him lift his head again. âMe, too.âÂ
Umm.Â
You can say things like that. He isnât allowed!Â
Youâre about to set some one-sided rules before your gift pops out of the bushes a few feet away.Â
âMy baby!â you quietly call, leaving Yoongiâs side to crouch down. âCome here, love. You hungry?â
She cautiously makes her way over, sniffing your hand when you leave it outstretched. After careful consideration, the little one nudges your palm, letting you glide fingers down her back as she approaches her bowls.Â
âYouâre so tiny,â you observe with slight pity. âWeâll get you well fed in no timeââ
âHey, Sugar! Oh, is this her? Sheâs gorgeous, no wonder!â
Huh? Sugar?Â
Who else knows the catâs name already?
Your neck almost strains when you look up to see whoâs talking. When you notice an older lady donning a really comfy, fluffy robe, you feel like it looks super familiar before you stand.Â
âHi,â you greet before introducing yourself, extending your hand and shaking the womanâs soft, delicate fingers. âSorry if we were too loud.â
âCall me Miss Dion. And you werenât too loud this time, sweetie,â she says with a wink, glancing down at the kitty eating what you laid out. âWas just cominâ out to water my plants so itâs good to see youâre here, too. Looks like he finally got some sense back in that head of his.â
âIâm standing right here, you know.â
âOh, I know!â
Back? How long has she known about you? Do her and Yoongi actually converse regularly? Their banter is⊠Really adorable.Â
Itâs making you fall even more in love with the man biting his cheek in amusement.Â
Wait.Â
Is Yoongi Sugar?Â
That is so fucking cute you could cry.Â
âIâm back to take care of this guy,â you explain with a head tilt. âAnd the little one, of course.âÂ
Itâs when you say this that Miss Dion notices the bandages on Yoongiâs face, concern pushing down her brows. âWhat happened to you, young man?â
âNothing to worry about.âÂ
âYou sure? I got some ointment in my kitchen somewhereââ
âItâs all goodââ
âWeâll take it,â you cut him off, not looking but feeling his stare on your face. âHow much do we owe you?âÂ
âOh, donât you worry about that.â With a snuff at Yoongi and a smile your way, Miss Dion heads inside to fetch a bottle.
In the meantime, you give your lover a quiet stare before bending down to run your hands over soft fur.Â
âPapa Sugar is gonna need that so he canât argue,â you coo to your cat, cheekily ignoring Yoongiâs sputtering puff of air above your head.
âPapa Sugar? Really?â
You glance up to his smile with a mischievous one of your own. âWhat, you wanna be Sugar Daddy instead?â
The swirl in your belly is instant. Because Yoongi can only look out into the distance, biting his lip and failing to hide his grin.
Sigh. If only he didnât have those injuries across his face. Youâd push him back into the door and slam it shut if it was any other day.Â
Patience, patience, patience.Â
Those hits arenât gonna heal with just one round of gauze.Â
When you have to replace the cotton patches, at least youâll have something to help.Â
â
â
Itâs not until youâre about to tuck in for the night that Yoongi approaches your side of the bed. Judging by the headphones slung around his neck, heâs about to work, so you assume heâs just coming to give you a kiss goodnight.Â
But after he does exactly that, he asks you a question that warms your chest,Â
âWhereâs your keys.âÂ
âIn there,â you motion to the nearest wall, bag propped right under his windowsill. âInside pocket, I think.âÂ
Yoongi bends with a prolonged grunt, slowly rummaging until he finds your jangling keyring with its charms. When he grabs it, he silently sits on the edge up against your stomach, body heat permeating your tee while he fiddles with the clasps.Â
God, youâre so in trouble. You know exactly what heâs doing.Â
Unlike the last time he offered you complete access to his place, this time he didnât even hesitate. And the way he secures a key amongst the loop, itâs his silent way of cementing permanence.Â
Thatâs not another key for you to borrow.
Because that key is yours.
â
â
continued in angel, pt. 2
pitstop inbox before pt2!! | join the server!
a/n: holy crap we're doing it we are actually back in the main storyline?! how do we feel right now because i am over the damn moon diving into this story again. here's a slight pitstop before you make your way over to part two (THE CONTINUATION IS IN A REBLOG!) so take a breather before heading into the resttttttt
++ feedback box:
â„ of course, any reblogs/comments/messages are appreciated!
â„ for the ones that are too shy to reblog with a review, comment on this, or send a message, i went ahead and made another anonymous form where you can send in what you think!
â„ no emails collected, no need to put in a username. itâs literally just a comment dropbox :D feedback can be as short/sweet or as long as youâd like!
â„ here!
++ more links:
â„ masterlistÂ
â„ three tangerines masterlist
a/n 2: we did this for 3tanfugue and the energy was great! just like last time, some of you guys suggested that we have post goals to encourage interaction. no one voted against it yet, so we'll keep it goin!
note goal: since we're back in main storyline, upping the goal! 1,000 notes is the goal, so when we hit that, 3tan14 will be dropped as soon as it's done! thank you all for reading and would love to hear any thoughts: what did you like about the chapter? how did a certain scene make you feel? what are you excited to see next? any shares, comments, tags, and reblogs with commentary count, and i appreciate anything you guys have to say.
explicit warnings: cursing, thigh riding, cowgirl, oral (m rec), naughty studio time(??), couch sex, rough sex, giving yoongi the business, bold as fuck reader, choking, spanking, penetrative sex, kissing deserves to be here too lol, alexa play no hands by waka flocka, deep throating, hair/head tugging, nipple play, yoongi in that gd tank, yoongi in those gd glasses, teasing, titty fucking hello!!!!, stripping while he watchesâŠ. yeah, missionary, sub!3tanyoongi?????, scratching, multiple orgasms, protected sex, emotional sex, the glasses.. stay on??, good god theyâre so hot iâm blushing
â
â
Itâs morning when Jimin gets a call.Â
Shifting in sheets that arenât his, he sleepily blinks once before eyeing the blue light with a squint, wondering who dares wake him up before his natural rise. What time even is it anyway? Itâs gotta be an ungodly hour if his circadian rhythm is disturbed.Â
Still, he grabs his cell from the nightstand, flinching at the movement behind him and inwardly slinging out curses.Â
Because waking him up is one thing.Â
But if anyone disturbs Taehyung heâs gonna give them hellâ
Min Yoongi: Incoming Call
Shit.
Jimin yanks the covers off, rushing out of bed and snapping Tae awake anyway. For what? Donât fucking know, but theyâre ready. Wherever. Whatever. They already stayed up clutching their phones until they physically couldnât keep their eyes open.Â
Because as much as Yoongi assured him nothing would happen, Jimin still couldnât let go of his car keys.
Answering slow, he feels his chest winding and winding, eyes locked with Taehyung while they both wait on edge, ââŠYoongi?â
âYeah.â
Thank the fucking stars.Â
Yoongiâs okay. Heâs on the line. He made it to morning or whatever fucking time it is, and heâs doing exactly what he said he would.
And itâs enough, enough, enough.
Burns zing up the corners of Jiminâs eyes, and he swipes hard as Taehyung moves, likely to hear whatâs happening and even more likely to just be by his side.Â
Jimin is grateful for either one. But he tries to keep composure as he croaks, âYou better have woken me up for a reason.â
The slight hum on the line induces a wobbly smile. âYou slept?â
âFuck you,â Jimin shakily laughs, wiping liquid relief from an eye before Taehyungâs thumb brushes tenderly over the other. His gaze is thankful while continuing, âWe did but not much.â
âSorry.â
âItâs okay.â Sniffling, Jimin walks to Taeâs door, letting him into the hallway first and finally drinking in the sight of his ass in those sweats. Because he can finally function like a normal, smitten loser again. âWeâll come over so we canââ
âNo need.â
âWhat?â Nope. Back to panic mode. And judging from his boyfriendâs posture, Taehyung has backpedaled into that, too. âWhat do you mean no need?â
Thereâs a slight pause on the line, and small noises make their way through the speaker. It sounds like bedsheets, but it also sounds likeâŠÂ
âSheâs still sleeping.â
Oh.
Oh, shit.
A tidal wave of relief crashes into Jiminâs ducts as he hangs his head, palming his face caught in a heavy tide of emotion. When he turns, Taehyung fairs no better, his eyes red and fingers wiping at a perfect, perfect cheek. One of them sniffles, but Jimin canât tell if itâs him or not, because his vision is blurry and his heart is beating, beating, beating again.Â
Whether you know it or not, whatever you did last night may have just changed Yoongiâs entire life.
Because Jimin knows this man through and through. Years of picking up his habits and tells didnât amount to nothing. Itâs how he was able to sense exactly when to intervene, and how he knew exactly what that hauntingly hollow tone in Yoongiâs voice meant when he busted in that day.Â
The tone he hears now? The man that just spoke on the line?Â
That is a Min Yoongi so in love he canât even hide it over the phone.Â
Fuck.Â
Gathering himself, Jimin squeaks out, âI⊠Iâm glad youâŠâ What the fuck does he say? Every thought jams in his throat so hard he has to hand the phone off.
Thankfully, Taehyung perfectly continues his thoughts, voice scratching rocks under a waking river, âWeâre glad youâre both safe.â
âMm.â
âSo whenâs the wedding?â
Jimin huffs through a fresh batch of tears, clearing his face before grinning at Tae very seriously awaiting an answer. Honestly, at this point? Itâs not far-fetched. Jiminâs seeing your future clearer than his present, and maybe he will be a fun uncle sooner than he thinks.
If only Yoongi would just get the fucking talk with your brother over with.Â
But Jimin understands the hesitation. If he were in that same position, thereâs no telling when he would be courageous enough to stand up to the guy. Thereâs a reason heâs quick to command a room, and his lifelong mission to protect his younger sister made him grow up a lot faster than everyone else.Â
Still⊠Yoongi just deserves to be happy. And youâre the very obvious answer to helping with that.Â
As much as he may have wanted some chances of his own, Jimin is grateful you found your way into his best friendâs heart. Not just anyone is invited inside, and even less people can truly be allowed to stay.Â
And youâre probably the only one that has permanent residence.Â
âYou guys should get some sleep.â
Taehyung pouts right on cue, and Jimin canât fight those sleepy, droopy eyes. âYou didnât answer me.â
Cute as fuck! He must be stopped. Taking the phone, Jimin speaks into the line fully recovered, shooting his cheeky partner a teasing glare, âWe will if you get some, too.â
âCanât.â
âWhy not?â
âGot some things to do at the studioââ
âNo!â They reject together, both equally as appalled because what the fuck kinda answer is that?Â
âAfter what happened last night? Are you crazy?â
âWhat happened to spending time with her? Men!âÂ
âHeâs going on a business trip, I canât lose to him.â
âSo what?â Tae asks before they both share an even further confused look. Yoongi may be a lovesick fool but that doesnât give him an excuse to be a dumbass! âYouâre just gonna leave her alone?â
Thereâs a sigh on the line before Jimin plants a hand on his hip. âNot just that. You gotta rest, too, bro. If she doesnât tell you to take it easy or at least get checkedâwhich she willâweâre going over there to annoy you.âÂ
âYou serious?â
âYes, Iâm serious.â Jimin cocks his head and leans closer to the phone. âAt least rest easy for the next couple days. Especially if you have all this time to see each other.â
The timing couldnât be more perfect. Your brother is leaving for his trip and Yoongi caught some unfortunate hits to his ribs. The dude basically has a free pass to spend the whole week with you, and heâs not even taking full advantage of it? Oh, the things Jimin has to say about the thin line of work ethic and relationship effort.Â
âIâll think about it.â
âThink about it for a long time,â Taehyung cuts in before Jimin can pop off, walking away into the living room.Â
Itâs fine. Let him figure out that you arenât a woman he can just leave. Frankly? That would tickle Jimin to no end to see Yoongi folding his plans so fast just to be with you.Â
But he spares him the tirade only because youâre fast asleep right next to him. âThank you for calling, man.â
âSaid I would.â
âI know.âÂ
Because above all else, Jimin is happy to hear that voice. Even if itâs obvious heâs a little banged up from last night, itâs still Yoongi. In one piece. Thatâs all Jimin wanted, and he canât thank you enough,
âDonât overwork yourself, and stay with her as long as you can.â
Thereâs a small laugh on the other end. âI plan on it, Chim.â
And Jimin catches on to why. âIâm holding you to that then.âÂ
â
â
Dawn breaks through open blinds, stretching its orange tint across a clean, spotless table.Â
You donât know what got you up so early. But when you peer into the kitchen, you tell yourself you woke up right on time.Â
Because seeing Yoongi when youâre wide awake is better than any dream youâll ever have.
Not because of his appearance, even though the sight of him sends a pang through your chest. No. Itâs the way heâs quietly prepping a morning meal, using the arm on his better side thatâs not sporting a nasty hit to the ribs, without you even asking.Â
Bits of sunlight dance right out of your eyes.
The effort. The consideration. This man shouldnât be lifting a finger, yet here he is cooking before you even left his bed. Isnât this the same man that got caught up in a fight hours ago? Isnât this the same man you almost walked out on with a frozen heart?Â
Yes. But heâs also the same man that loves you. And you still canât grasp that concept in any of the fingers playing with his tee you borrowed.
âHi,â you whisper, telling him a thousand things.Â
To which he regards before smiling soft, voice travelling over linoleum and circling around your heart, âMorning, doll.â
Damn. You hear it. Yoongiâs sore as hell.Â
But instead of getting into that right away, you silently take residence by his side. Because this moment feels too delicate, and you admire his willingness to take care of you unprompted. You didnât even know youâd eat before going back home.Â
With a hand warming his back, you wait until Yoongiâs done tossing food on the stove to peck his morning-chilled cheek. âThank you for cooking,â you murmur, admiring those beautiful brown eyes. âSleep okay?â
âCus of you,â your lover softly responds, eyeing your lips before gliding back up to your gaze. âYou?â
Ugh. Heâs gotta know those glasses are so unfair. Theyâve gotten you repeatedly before, and theyâre certainly getting you now.Â
But you canât help but deflate at the cuts behind those rims, while knowing there are even more bruises hiding underneath his oversized tee. How is Yoongi cooking right now? How is he even awake? âSame.âÂ
âGood.âÂ
These instant, deep shivers at his deeper morning voice will never, ever go away. But anything you wanna do about them isnât important right now. Right now, you need to make sure Yoongi is either okay, or finds a way to get better.Â
Sliding your hands down the slopes of his chest, you delicately rest one on his ribs. âDoes it still hurt?âÂ
Yikes. That wince is enough. But Yoongi doesnât shy away from your touch, and you appreciate the way he stays honest. âItâs sore. But I should be good.â
âYou gonna get it checked?â
Thereâs a slight upward tilt of his lips. âNot right now.â At least the honesty persists, as much as you donât want him following the typical manly response to hospital visits. âBut I will if you want me to.â
âPlease go,â you gently urge, lest you disturb the soft morning dew before it melts with the sunrise. âFor me?â
Only sizzles from the stove fill the space until Yoongi nods, and his voice is just as low and tender, âIâll go after work.â
Oh. âYouâre working today?â
Just like breakfast, you didnât expect this, either. Frankly, you figured neither of you were gonna even think about work, much less go. Sure, heâs due a hospital visit and you owe some friends immediate explanations for your absence. But other than that, shouldnât Yoongi be resting?Â
Does his craft truly mean that much?Â
Well, shit. You gotta respect his work ethic, thatâs for damn sure. Because you would sequester yourself to your bedroom and have endless dates with your television if you were sporting a good jab or two. This music thing must mean more to Yoongi than you previously thought. And who are you to step on that dream?Â
Suddenly, all thoughts and concerns flee from the kiss on your cheek.Â
âIâll stay if you stay,â he says, turning to move the pan and scrunching his face with a grunt. Fuck.Â
âIâŠâ Shit, you were gonna go back to the house anyway. And from Yoongiâs smartass smirk, you can tell he already knew that. âJust need to check on him, too. And he doesnât have a car right now, so. I should at least give him a ride.âÂ
âFigured.â In a move so domestic your head spins, Yoongi turns your body and gently pats your butt. âNow go sit. Letâs eat and figure this out.âÂ
â
â
As you devour a flawless meal and clean your dishes, you plan out the day. Youâll head home and check on your brother while Yoongi heads to the studio, and then youâll rendezvous with your friends to hang out until heâs done with work. Theyâre already lighting up your phone like no oneâs businessâespecially Yuri.Â
Yoongi flicks the sink off before you both head to his bedroom, and you melt at the way he slowly wraps his arms around your front halfway there, all four of your legs slowing to close the rest of the distance.Â
Whatâs he doing? This is joyfully new, but you have a pretty tight deadline. Warming his forearm and your own cheeks, you chuckle out, âWe have to hustle, old man.âÂ
âYou hustle me all the time,â he accuses into your shoulder blade, kissing its ridge and making you reconsider walking out the door entirely. âLemme have this.âÂ
Your second laugh is more subdued, and youâre right between his bed and desk when you lift both hands to hold him close. âYou have everything I got,â you wisp into his skin, planting your lips once, twice before you feel his arms press further in. âSo this is nothing.âÂ
Seconds and silence slide by, the delicate veil of early morning still hovering around the room. When Yoongi doesnât say anything, you make to turn and face him.Â
But youâre stopped before your heart skips.Â
âI could stay like this all day,â he admits, voice so low it rumbles through your bones. âAnd itâd be perfect.âÂ
âWhat, you donât wanna see my face?â You joke with a giggle. âRude, but thatâs fine.âÂ
Yoongi only buries his nose further, his glasses sliding against your skin peeking from his shirt. âIâm much braver right here, doll.âÂ
Oh.Â
The leap your heart does is more of a dive, plummeting into the seafoam swirling around your feet. All the words you want to respond with jump off right after, leaving you with nothing but the clouds in your eyes.Â
You donât quite know what he means by that. But it feels like those six words hold the weight of a thousand, so you simply let another kiss on his smooth forearm linger. âDo you want me to go with you?âÂ
A puff of laughter warms you right through and, despite his earlier admission, Yoongi does slowly spin you around.Â
And when you follow, you realize youâre much braver when you arenât facing him, too.Â
âItâs not that, babe,â he says through a dashing curve. âBut the offer was cute.âÂ
âI take it back then.âÂ
âDamn!âÂ
Both of your laughs whoosh out and collide, sweeping as Yoongi pinches your side and you flinch towards the bed. âYou fuckerâ!â
Before you know it, your back hits a comforter before a weight presses your stomach, emotions clashing as youâre elated and shy and immediately concerned for your boyfriendâs side. âBaby, be carefulââ
Lips capture yours, sucking up your warning before a hand slides under your head. Sighing, you arch into his chest, feeling the weight of his chains slip across your breasts.Â
Euphoria isnât an adequate enough word to describe how you feel. Where there used to be flutters in your ribcage now reside strong, powerful wing beats, gusts of want and desire lifting you off the ground and launching you into clear skies. Starlight of every color exists within each kiss you share, and your fingers feebly grab his tee to keep you from falling back down to earth.Â
âIf we donât go now,â Yoongi rasps before sliding his mouth against yours, âWeâre never going anywhere again.âÂ
âI know,â you whisper, willingly letting him kiss you once more, âIs that a promise?âÂ
âFuck, I wish.âÂ
You do, too. But you know youâre running out of time for what you need to do. And werenât you just saying you had to respect his aspirations? Shit, you really do need to snap out of it. âCome on,â you order with a pat to his chest. âWe have all week to do this. We got time.âÂ
Turns out, youâre still amongst the heavens. The way Yoongiâs looking at you? This is the closest youâll ever get to being held by an angel.Â
Did he get more handsome overnight? Or is it the light in his eyes sustained since his confession in the kitchen? You donât quite know, and you may never pinpoint why, but the tug he has on your heart spans space and time.Â
And youâll run through both forever to keep meeting him again and again.Â
Burns prick your eyes, but he mercifully stands before he can catch any evidence of your yearning.Â
Just like that, the two of you bounce back to getting ready, with him sliding notebooks and headphones in a backpack while you change into your own clothes. As you sling your bag over a shoulder, he reaches for the closest hoodie, and you wordlessly make your way to the front door.Â
You really do hope he gets looked at today. But just like the calm after a storm, you want to encourage him gently rather than shove him out. At least he seems receptive to your gentle suggestions.
But after you ask one more time and he simply nods, you lower your eyes to his kicks. âSorry if Iâm nagging. Iâd just worry less if you went right away, thatâs all.â
âYou arenât nagging, babe.â Your freshly bloomed lover reaches out to hold your wrist, smoothing a rough thumb over your skin. Fucking hell, you canât help but frown at the gashes and cuts marring his knuckles. âIâll go as soon as I can.â
Not just his hands, but his face. His ribs. And maybe other places you havenât even seen yet.Â
You donât wanna leave his side.Â
But you have to head out before your brother leaves. Things need to get patched up before he flies out into more stress, and you owe him an apology for walking out when he was still aching. Based on Yoongiâs physical state? Your brother could be hiding some big wounds and you didnât even wanna talk to him.Â
However. Was last night necessary? Absolutely. You cannot entertain the possible outcomes had you not tried hard enough to get through Yoongiâs door. His eyes were so dulled, his hands felt so cold. What would have happened if you didnât force yourself inside?Â
Why was that guitar smashed to pieces?Â
This is also why you refuse to leave. So many questions, so many things you still donât know. Like what all happened when you were separated? And how in the hell is this man in love with you?
âI donât wanna go,â you confess, instantly encased in his arms and warmth. âIâd much rather keep kissing you.âÂ
âTrue,â he says with a resigned huff, shifting his glasses with an adorable nose scrunch. If only he didnât have so many little red lines of conflict on his face. âBut we both have stuff to take care of, so letâs get all that done first.â
âUgh, fine.â Your groan is more teasing than serious, and Yoongiâs laugh is nothing but understanding.Â
Damn. You still feel it. You really donât wanna go. Be it the rawness of last night still on your skin, or the confessions still on your tongues, you just wanna stay by his side. âSorry,â you breathe out, lacing your fingers to pepper love along his strong, reddened ridges. âIâm serious. I donât wanna leave you right now.â
Walking out of Yoongiâs door just doesnât feel right. Even if heâs right there and will be following you out. Is this feeling normal? Are you supposed to feel this tightly woven to someone? Because the stitching between your hearts has only gotten stronger in the tempest of last night, as if you bonded together just to hold on for dear life.Â
Maybe thatâs exactly what happened. And itâs exactly why you can barely take one step out of his place.Â
âThen donât.â
Not one second passes before your chin is held, and lips slide so tenderly across yours that they may as well melt into your touch. Your reaction is quickly swooped into his mouth, and everything falls away as you let him seize your every thought. Lightning from last night zips out of your limbs, your toes, your fingers clasping his loose tee.Â
You might just cry where you stand.
How have his kisses gotten even better? How have you never felt this way even though youâve done this far more times than you were ever supposed to? It should be impossible, and yet, this man finds even more ways to astound you.Â
Yoongi slips a hand over your cheek, giving one more beautiful push of his lips as he confesses, âI donât wanna leave you, either.âÂ
And your breath stutters onto his features. âYou, too?â
Slow, he kisses your cheek, the clear rim of his specs skimming your nose. When he draws back, you look right into his eyes, wondering why heâs watching your mouth instead.Â
âMe, too.â Yoongi kisses your other side with a quiet peck. âFuck, me, too.âÂ
You fucking hate what you have to do, but you donât have a choice.Â
With one last lingering kiss, you both gather enough courage to set out and do what you must.Â
â
â
Your house is already a flurry of activity as you enter to see your brother in the kitchen, packing his leather duffle thatâs a constant companion on his trips.Â
Of course. The memory of him purchasing the lavish accessory pops into your head every time you watch him scurry around, dimples ever present on his proud cheeks. Itâs almost enough to make you smile yet again.Â
But you canât when the same face is currently scratched to hell. Just like Yoongiâs, if not worse.Â
Fuck, is he really gonna travel looking like that?Â
âHey,â he rasps out, still fighting off slumber. âYouâre back earlier than I thought.âÂ
âWanted to check on you before we left.â Fuck, your voice sounds like itâs being forced through a clogged pipe. Loosen the hell up! âAnd dude. Put some bandaids on, yeah?âÂ
âYeah, just give me a sec. Making sure I have everything before my ride gets here.âÂ
âHuh?â He got a ride? Youâre here now so you can take him to the airport. âYou sure you donât need me to drive you?âÂ
âYeah, itâs all good. I didnât know you were coming back.âÂ
Shit. His body seems just as angular as it did last night. Which, quite frankly, could still be from what went down in the lot.Â
Because even though you see both men banged up, you suddenly realize you donât actually know what all transpired.Â
After all, there wasnât much talk of it after you walked into the tempest of Yoongiâs living room.
Of course, you arenât gonna bring it up just this second. There are other things to ask about and make sure of first. âWallet? Phone? Passport?âÂ
âYup, yup, uhh.. Yup.âÂ
Zippers sling in the quiet morning air as you continue, âAnd youâre coming back on Friday, right?â
âOh.. Nah.â When you start crossing the kitchen, your brother hauls his leather bag over his better shoulder. Honestly, no one would be able to tell the other oneâs bruised with his suit on. That thing damn well covers everything except the cuts on his face and hands. âSaturday.âÂ
You pause in your journey to the medicine cabinet. âWait.. Saturday? The release partyâs on Friday.â
âYeah.. I know.â
What the fuck? Thatâs bullshit theyâre keeping him longer than they have to. Struggling to understand how corporate can keep your brother on a leash and get away with it, you urge, âTell them to at least let you go home a day early. Donât you wanna support your friends?â
âYou mean Yoongi?â
A zing of terror zips through your eyes, freezing every vein in an instant.Â
The fuck was that question? Never mind. Stay calm stay calm stay fucking calm. âUhh, yeah, heâs one of them? But the other guys, too, right? I know you care about them and this is huge.â
Mercifully, your sibling just shakes his head and waves you off. âDonât you think I already tried? I donât wanna miss it but I donât have a choice. Conference schedule is pretty tight and Iâm heading the panel on Friday.â
âIs it in the morning? You can fly out afterââ
âWhy are you fighting so hard?â
âWhy arenât you fighting harder!â
Okay, what in the hell is happening right now? Screw optics and how this must look for you, your brother needs to be there. Him and Yoongi are the tightest of friends, the most ride or die duo youâve ever seen. You canât picture a timeline where he misses this monumental moment, and itâs starting to really upset you that heâs barely trying.Â
âAlright, you know what?â Hard steps surge forward as you stand rigid, a duffle hastily dumped onto tile. âYou donât know what Iâve tried. You donât even know if I even told him yet.â
Fucking shit. You hold his stare before turning away, tossing out the idea of bandages entirely and searing footsteps into the hallwayâ
âOr do you.â
Before icing over with the unforgiving frost of zero gravity space.Â
Slow, you turn, not quite facing him but not backing down, either. ââŠExcuse me?â
âYou heard me. You talkinâ? What else has he been doing to you?â
Oh. Fuck that.Â
Doing to you?Â
Fuck all of this. This is too much to handle right now and you know youâre gonna snap if he keeps pushing because you are not having this conversation right before he leaves. Youâve already thought about this before, right? You cannot fuck with his head right before business trips because he needs to be on and locked in.Â
But now heâs fucking with your temper and those are some choice fucking words pulled out of his ass.Â
You donât think youâve ever legitimately threatened this man to his face and meant it before, and it tears a sharp corner of your heart, âYou better be very careful. With whatever you wanna say next.â
The air proves too thick to slice. While your body stands aflame, your brother is iced over, brimming with an energy that damn near takes physical form. âAll Iâm saying is? I find out some fucking bullshit is going onââ
No no no, not now.
Reacting fast is your only instinct, brain haywire and fizzling fizzling boiling. Harsh, you spin on your heel and shout the first thing you can think of, âOh, come onââ
âYou better hope to god youâre ready for whatâs comingââ
âStop!â Fuck fuck fuck, this is so frustrating because your head is exploding and your body is screaming to just tell him already. Fuck the consequences at this point this is ludicrous.Â
Doing to you? Yoongi? How dare he speak about his best friend like that how dare he accuse him without outright saying the words all you have to do is tell your brother how wrong heâs got it.Â
But you canât be the one. Yoongi said he would, and he probably took months to get to that point of strengthâand healing, from what you can tell.Â
This is between them. Them. You have to honor that, as much as you wanna just confess everything now and deal with it yourself.Â
But goddamn your brother is pulsing with anger and itâs leaking into your own charged air.Â
What does he think is happening? Does he think Yoongiâs just, what, playing you? Heâs wrong. Heâs so wrong. Yoongiâs been nothing but the best thing thatâs ever happened to you and shit your heart hurts becauseâŠ
Your brother is valid in thinking that.Â
How foolish. Didnât you guard your heart from Yoongi for the longest? Didnât everything start because you figured you knew who he was because of his reputation? You got him all wrong, too. So how can you be mad at your brother for doing the same?Â
Fuck, think. Just think before someone gets hurt.Â
Because if you arenât careful, someoneâor multiple someonesâwill get hurt in seconds. You have to bear the pain alone right now. To protect them both, you have to keep your trembling mouth shut.Â
And? You have to admit that something isnât fair here. Not to you, not to Yoongi, but to him. Last night was rough as fuck but, while you both got to have raw, beautiful closure, the one standing in front of you had to go to sleep in an empty house.Â
So chill the fuck out.Â
Breathing to cool down, you tense and loosen, tense and loosen. âI get it. Youâre angry, and you have a lot going on. But,â you bite down on your lip to keep going. âWeâre talking about something else. Weâre talking about you, and Iâm still pissed you even let those guys goad you into a fight. What are we, twelve?â
Seething, your sibling takes the switch of pace. But it is not what you want to hear. âAre you seriâ? What the hell was I supposed to do? That son of a bitch grabbed youââ
âI know,â you recoil. âDonât tell me like you were there, because you werenât.â
Finallyâfinallyâthose angry lines in his face vanish.Â
But they make way for something much worse than anger. Because your older brother, someone thatâs been there for you your whole life..Â
Looks absolutely stricken over the one time he wasnât.Â
Damn it.Â
Regretful, you drop your shoulders in exhaustion and quiet compromise. When you continue, your voice is much softer, âBut I told you: they were. Your friends, they were there because they knew you wanted that. Jimin got me away, Yoongi took me home and stayed.âÂ
You really have got to stop saying his name like you love him. It could start becoming too obvious.Â
Shuddering, you shift your weight, folding your arms and shrinking into yourself.Â
That night, despite Yoongiâs best and most gentle efforts, still clings to where that loser touched you at Dalo. You hate that you havenât gotten over it, and you loathe the way you still rub over the same spot. Over, and over. âWhat did you want him to do? Leave me here?â
âNo.âÂ
âExactly. And he didnât.â You adjust your stance again, making an impromptu gamble as you decide to let some truth leak out. Because your brother is owed at least this much. âAnd fine, you wanna know something? We do talk more because of it.â
Your brotherâs head snaps up, and you brace. Because if you show any shred of weakness or hesitation, heâll see right through your weak attempt to hide most of the truth,Â
âBut donât ever accuse him of doing anything to me. That was fucked up to say and you know it.â
âFuck.â In agreement, he rubs his hair back. âIt was. Iâm sorry.âÂ
âTrust me,â you swallow, hating that this is how things have to be for now. âYou have nothing to worry about. Heâs never.. Never done anything to me, anyway.âÂ
Itâs not a lie. Everything heâs done has been with you. For you. Because of you.Â
But your heartâs in anguish as it sinks. Because that expression on your older siblingâs face can only be one thing. Â
Pure. Utter. Relief.
Fire singes your eyes before you can quell the flame. Itâs the hardest technical truth to swallow.Â
Sure, he doesnât have anything to worry about as far as you being safe. And on top of that, he doesnât have to worry about any fake shit because Yoongi confessed to you last night.
But as far as his best friend sleeping with and now dating his sister behind his back? That is still very much sitting right in the center of the table.Â
And now youâre starting to see just how fucked all three of you are as soon as you sit down to eat the truth.Â
But Yoongi said heâd be the one to tell, so he will.Â
This feeling is so fucking miserable, though.Â
In the end, your brother is effectively convinced, raking a hand across his head and sighing. âJimin told me what all went down at Dalo, I just⊠Last night was⊠Fucked up.âÂ
âWell, yeah.â
âNo. See, this is just like what you said to me. You canât say it like you were there.â
Itâs your stomachâs turn to twist. âSo? You were scratched and bruised to hell, and YâŠâ Shut up, shut up. Youâre not supposed to know about the state of anyone else. âAnd you were⊠quieter.â
âBecause of what happened, dude.â
You blink. âWhat⊠What happened?â
Your brother looks at youâreally looks at you.Â
And suddenly, your gut flares in terror, storming in an instant across your abdomen.Â
âThat bitch pulled something on us.â
Your heart.Â
Itâs in freefall.
âWait⊠What?â You canât even form more than one syllable at a time, your legs turning gelatinous and knees starting to give out. âNo⊠What are youâŠ?â
What the fuck did he just say? That bitch pulled a what?Â
Your sibling slowly walks toward you once again, watching like heâs just waiting for you to say anything. Do anything.Â
But youâre a complete statue because all you can think about is the horror of something happening and the relief that nothing happened all at once.Â
Was Yoongi too scared to mention that part? Is this why he was holding back and shaking every time he reached out to touch you? Even this morning, he was soâŠÂ
Youâve never seen him like that. Is this why?Â
Your mind is swirling and crashing, overlapping each passing thought and scream running through your head. âIâm so sorry,â you hitch out, âI didnât know. Why didnât you say anything?â
âDidnât wanna scare you,â he sighs out. Putting both hands on his hips, your brother stops feet away, visibly still shook as he pierces wooden planks with his stare. âBut he pulled it right before Yoongi⊠and if it werenâtâŠFuck.âÂ
Burns flare and slice through your eyes when he has to pause. What is he trying to say? Pulled what?Â
Before Yoongi what?Â
Your brother continues, and your throat tightens. âIf it werenât for some random ass sirens, I⊠Things couldâve been so different.âÂ
What the fuck is happening. What the hell are you hearing?Â
âIt was probably dumb as fuck. But I was so fucking angry,â he grits out, watery eyes crushed looking your way. âSo fucking mad at how he was talking about you, I.. Walked right up to him and told him to fuck off.â
You canât even breathe.Â
âI still feel it,â he quietly adds, fingers pressed against his side. âRight here.âÂ
âFuck,â you finally choke out, eyes on fucking fire.Â
âBut all I knew was to keep you all safe,â he says, with hardened resolve and a wobbly chin. âAnd thatâs exactly what I did. I did that shit, even if that meantââÂ
Tears fling out of your eyes, flowing hot down your cheeks because you wouldnât want any of them to go out that way. Nothing happened nothing happened nothing happened and yet your body is acting as if something did and it hurts.Â
Your brother is there as soon as you crumple forward, letting you bury your head in his chest and sob your heart out. For him, for his friends, and for all the time you had with the man you love so, so dearly.Â
If anything happened to your brother before you came clean⊠If anything happened before you and Yoongi could evenâŠÂ
Suddenly, you feel equal weights of guilt. For running out on your brother. And for almost walking out on Yoongi.Â
You decide an apology is in order for both of them, and all the understanding in the world for Yoongiâs frosted demeanor as soon as you get him alone again.
And you are one hundred percent going to tell your brother everything once heâs back.Â
The tears cannot stop, and youâre sure you are crying unimpeded in a pressed and primmed suit. âIâm so sorry,â you keep repenting like a prayer. âThis is all my fault.â
âNoââ
âYou almostââ
âHey, stop.â He yanks you back, both of your faces soaked with saltwater. âWhat did I say before? I threw the first swing. You didnât do anything wrong.â
âBut it led to all this, I just.. I just feel so fucking stupid.â
âDonât. Hey, look at me.â Firm but gentle, he holds you at armâs length, forcing you to face him. âMaybe weâre both stupid, but you werenât the idiot. I was.âÂ
You feel so many conflicting things in your soul.Â
What would you have done if Yoongi was in critical condition? What would you have done differently if your brother was instead? Are they the same? Are the two situations really so different anymore?Â
No they arenât they arenât they arenât.Â
âPlease donât do that again,â you shake out. âEven if it was for me, if I ever lost you, I...âÂ
âYou know I canât promise anything.â He furrows his brows when you eye him with anger and sadness. âBut nothing like that is happening again. Especially with the same dudes.âÂ
âOkay.âÂ
A vicious tornado of emotions sends your whole body into agonizing pain. This isnât what you expected at all, and itâs causing your limbs to lock at the bends. Too many scenarios are jangling about yet you canât ask for specifics because that will just make it even more real.Â
A nightmare is somehow better once you know it ends with you waking up. âIâm⊠gonna need some time to process everything.â
âI know. And I wasnât planning on saying anything, but⊠You deserve to know the things I get into.âÂ
Ah.Â
The irony is not lost on you.Â
âAt least, if they involve you. We learned our lesson. You were right to tell us off.â
God. You feel numb.Â
âThanks,â you murmur, suddenly immensely tired. âI think I need more sleep.â
A blaring honk sounds outside the house, and you both flinch at the noise.Â
And your throat burns at the way your brother instinctively swept you behind his back.Â
When you realize what it is, you know what has to come next.Â
And heâs the first to react as he turns to face you again, âAlright. Iâm heading out, just remember to go get my baby when sheâs fixed, yeah?â
âDo you have to go?â
Wait.
The question seems to startle him as much as it does you.Â
How did you blurt it right out before even registering the words? Why does your heart clench at the sight of those eyes looking so pained?Â
Why does everything feel so shaky within these walls that were always your home?
âI do,â he says, voice tight. âIâm sorry.âÂ
And why the fuck do you feel sad heâs leaving?
âNo, no, itâs.. Of course you have to.â You canât help the lump in your throat from bobbing, the regret in your limbs as they barely move at your side. âI dunno why I asked, I guess I just..âÂ
Thereâs no response to your sniffle.Â
âSorry for yelling,â you squeak out. âI just feel really queasy.â
For a lot more reasons than one.
âWe all made it out,â your brother whispers. âThatâs what matters.â
âWill you⊠Will you at least try to be back for the party?â
The man swallows with his brows knit tight, then attempts to crack the tiniest smile. âYou know I will. Thatâs my guy.âÂ
âOkay.â You nod, sniffling again. After what he just told you? You know heâll do anything for the ones he loves. âSee you there.â
Your brother rubs a comforting palm over your head before turning, heading for the door and grabbing his leather duffle.Â
When he stops to glance at you one more time, you give a little wave of your hand before watching the door click shut.Â
Chest caving as you collapse to the ground in tears.Â
â
â
The need to call Yoongi burns so harshly your fingers damn near set your top aflame.
But heâs at work, and you canât fuck things up right when youâre approaching the finish line. You almost did with your brother, and that gave you twelve heart attacks in the span of minutes.Â
Still. Your chest aches so much that a thirteenth could very well be approaching. You donât even realize youâre bracing the hallway wall for support until you try to stand, back sore and aching from bending so far for so long.Â
What did your brother mean to say about Yoongi? What did that coward pull on them? Do you even want to know what happened?Â
Fighting back tears, you reach down for your phone, shakily typing out a message only to erase it. Then again. And again.Â
And again.Â
Giving up, you forcefully swallow all your worries, cringing at the bitterness of the unknown and the burnt molasses of hidden truths.Â
Itâs going to be okay. No matter what you think or imagine in your head, they made it out, they made it out, they are all alive.Â
Thatâs the only reason you can move forward, each step getting you from your room. To your bathroom.Â
And back again.Â
â
â
After showering, you feel lighter and refreshed, though the soreness between your legs has yet to leave.Â
But you wouldnât want it any other way, as itâs another reminder of Yoongiâs apparent brush with survival. His broken living room spurned the creation of your bond, your devotion to him as he confessed before you gave him your utmost trust in his sheets.Â
The end is so close. As soon as this week is over, youâll rip the last bit of peel from your pair of tangerines, baring all truths to your brother and facing the consequences.Â
Finally ready, you head to your car, opening your text threads with a plan: start slow.Â
Start with something that can be interpreted neutrally if anyone saw it on his phone screen, especially if your headstrong ex is in the room.Â
You [12:31pm]: how are you feeling?
Yoongi [12:34pm]: 1 AttachmentÂ
You close your door with brows furrowed.Â
Yoongiâs at the hospital?Â
Thatâs not what you expected at all.Â
Your chest swells with relief knowing heâs there, but you also wanna make sure heâs feeling okay. Especially his mental state after whatever the fuck your brother just dropped on you before leaving.Â
Goddamn, thatâs going to gnaw at your brain until you find the right time and right amount of courage to ask about it. Because itâs very possible Yoongi wonât tell you.Â
Because itâs probably something he knows you wonât like.Â
Fuck.Â
You [12:34pm]: Loved an Attachment
You [12:34pm]: thank you for listeningđ€ still sore?
Yoongi [12:35pm]: Yeah, but not bad. Just there.
Wait. Heâs not at the studio. That means you canâ
Yoongi: Outgoing Call
âHey.â
âHey,â you slowly say as you pull out into the street. âIâm driving now so this is easier.â
âCourse. You going to Taeâs?â
âMaybe. Iâm going to Yuriâs first.â You swallow, realizing that you didnât tell him about what you let slip before driving over. âI.. Told her. About you.â
Thereâs a little bit of silence on the line, just some adjustments and muffled speaker sounds. âSorry, just writing this down. Whatâs wrong with that?â
You huff through your nose. Gotta be those patient forms that always take forever to fill out. âOh. Just more and more people knowing, is all.âÂ
âEveryoneâs gonna know eventually.âÂ
You hold back a small smile. Because heâs right. âYeah. Iâm just tired of this feeling.â
âLike youâre hiding something.â
Itâs your turn for silence. He doesnât know how accurately that was played out today. The only answer you can provide is a curt, âExactly.â
âSame.â
Wings beat around your heart again.Â
He wants this. Yoongi really, really wants this. And years ago, that outcome wouldnât have even crossed your mind as an option.Â
âThank you for going, baby.â
âThe guys made me.â
You hum. âWhich ones.â
After a pause, you hear a puff of amusement. âAll of them at some point today, actually.âÂ
All of them? Does that include your brother? Did they talk about the trip already?
Your laugh is bittersweet. âWell. Glad to know you can be forced by everyone else except me.â
âHey, I was already gonna go because of you!â Yoongi quietly retorts, and you giggle at the pout in his words. âJust wanted to get a headstart on work first.â
You were right. He really does wanna go all out for his musical endeavors.Â
Itâs extremely admirable, and wildly attractive, but it does come to a point. âAs much as I love your passion, old man, I wanna keep you upright.â
He laughs soft into the line, and you think you can listen to that specific sound on an infinite loop. âThatâs fair.âÂ
âHow long is it gonna take, you think?â
âDunno. But Iâll keep myself busy until Iâm out.â
Of course he will. You donât doubt he wonât waste any time. Didnât he bring journals in his backpack? You wouldnât be surprised if he wrote ten thousand songs before being called in. âJust call me if you need anything, please?â
âOf course, babe.â
âThank you,â you say with utmost sincerity. âIf only my brother would be less stubborn and get checked, too.â
âHeâll probably do it once he gets there.â
âDid you convince him?â
âNah. But once he knows I did, heâll do it.â
âFigures.â You scoff. âOkay, Iâm almost there. Let me know how it goes.â
âK. Bye, doll.â
You didnât ask him what went down. But itâs not the time nor place, and you have plenty of chances this week to figure out when that would beâif at all.Â
âTalk soon.âÂ
â
â
For a normally bustling household, Yuriâs house is quiet.Â
So itâs not shocking when you walk into the kitchen and see all your friends glance your way, slowly vacating their chairs with eyes never leaving your face. Even Reia is on high alert.Â
Did Yuri tell her? Did Yuri tell anyone else?Â
No. Sheâs a talker and loves spilling, but she promised. And when she promises something, you know you can trust her to keep it.Â
Itâs what pours emotion in your voice as you meekly greet, âHey, guysââ
A crushing hug closes your throat. Yuriâs the one that gets to you first, with Reia and Dominique waiting their turns to offer you healing, relieved embraces.Â
âWhat happened?âÂ
âScared us half to death.â
Dom puts you at armâs length to give a once over, noting your face rubbed raw and eyes still a little bloodshot. Thankfully, her pupils hold more concern than disappointment. âYou good?â
Your eyes wobble alongside your smile, and you think itâs enough proof. âMore than that,â you still decide to whisper, and your heart beats again at her reaction.Â
âThank god. I was ready to kick your ass if you werenât.â
Heading up to Yuriâs room, you all wait until the door is swung back before mounting her canopy bed, sitting in a tight circle as you divulge everything.Â
Well. Almost everything.Â
You tell them that Yoongi is the one youâve been seeing, how you went to check on him last night in a panic, and the terrifying reason why. When you mention the fight after the basketball game, all three of your friends erupt in questions, and you have to assure them everything turned out okay. Honestly, you also do this to assure yourself, too.Â
âSo⊠Your brotherâs just fine with all of this?â Reia asks, not noticing the tick of Domâs jaw.Â
âWell,â you start with a higher pitch, earning a pair of groans. âHe doesnât exactly know yetââ
âYup. Heâs gonna murder him.â
âYeah, should we say our condolences now or..â
âHow long has this been going on?â Reia fires off another question that digs into your chest. âWas he the one you were seeing the whole time?â
âYes,â you admit with a sigh. âI shouldâve told you guys from the beginning, but. The whole thing just felt so delicate. But! We just started making things official recently, so..âÂ
Dom turns your way. âOfficial how?â
Well. Here goes everything.Â
With a shaky breath, and lingering feelings from the time it happened, you reveal with watery eyes, âYoongi⊠Told me he loves me.â
Both Yuri and Reia react in yelps, Domâs gaze lowering as the girls reach to grab your hands.Â
Wait. Whatâs going on with her? Sheâs the one that knows the most, sheâs the one that covered for you all those months ago. She has to be the one that is the least surprised at all this.Â
Blinking, you note to confront her about it later. Right now, youâre too focused on trying not to cry as your friends tumble out questions and support,Â
âHe said it? Did you say it first or did he?âÂ
âHow did it happen! Oh, Iâm so happy for you, babeââÂ
âThankâthank you, Yuri,â you squeeze out as she hugs you close. âI couldnât believe it, but he just.. Said it. We werenât even doing anything, I was just.. Looking up what injuries he could have..âÂ
And he confessed in the most Yoongi fashion he could have.Â
Looking back, it shouldnât shock you at all. Heâs always found ways to sweep you off your proverbial feet, so why would a confession plucked from the heavens be any different?Â
She lets you go before wiping her eyes, Reia and even Dom now sporting watery pupils, too.Â
âAs much as Iâm upset at you for not telling us, Iâve never been so happy for you.â When Yuriâs features crease in another sob, you sniffle along with the rest. âItâs been so long since you⊠And you really.. Fuck.âÂ
You know what sheâs trying to say, and the realization has your throat constricting so tight.Â
Itâs been forever since youâve had something like this, someone like this. When you and Jungkook were together, you told him that you loved him before he broke it off.Â
Sure, you bought the rings together, but he never uttered those words until years after when it didnât even matter. And all your relationships after his were complete and utter bullshit, so you donât think you ever even heard those three words and knew them to be true.Â
Yoongi was the first to ever say them so sincerely.Â
And that fact makes your ducts burn and burn.Â
And when Yuri finally speaks, it breaks the dam holding your real deluge back,Â
âI canât think of anyone else that deserves to be loved more than you.âÂ
All at once, everything streams out as you hunch forward. The pain of everything youâve endured, the hopelessness of knowing youâd most likely end up alone, the excruciating prospect of a future that you never deemed bright, or peaceful, or comforting.Â
And to think that even this man couldâve been snatched away from you in a snap? Even more tears overlap with the ones youâre shedding, and you canât even reach out to hug all three beautiful, angelic souls surrounding you with tight arms and sobs because your limbs lock at all bends.Â
Itâs the exact release you need. All your friends supporting you, all the pent up anxiety of last night and today, the truth setting itself free in some capacityâall in the comfort of a plushie-laden bed you only doubted yourself in last time.Â
Everythingâs gonna be alright. It has to be. Youâre gonna fight for the ones you love, even if a war between them is inevitable.Â
It takes a few minutes of heavy silence for you all to separate, swiping and rubbing tears while letting out happy sniffles.Â
When you thank them for being understanding, they assure you itâs okay. And when you say youâre going to tell your brother soon, a force from the doorway has all of you leaping from lilac sheets,Â
âTell him what?âÂ
Jia stands firm with a laundry basket at her hip, and Yuri scoffs at her older sister for barging in. âA knock wouldâve been nice!âÂ
Fuck!Â
You canât tell Jia of all people. If you spill anything about Yoongi, sheâs one hundred percent going to tell your brother. Theyâre the same age, and run in pretty tight circles, so of course you are not going to risk it.Â
But you can tell her something else youâre going to tell your older sibling, so you fire out a half-truth,Â
âTell him not to pick any other fights that could get him killed.âÂ
Jiaâs eyes zoom to your wrecked face, and she drops the laundry with haste before asking, âWhat happened? When? Tell me now.âÂ
Huh. Maybe your brother has a type, if heâs still into Jia like he said before.Â
You feel a little spark in your chest as you let her know they all got in a scuffle after the basketball game, and another pang as she immediately abandons the room and clothes with a fierce declaration,Â
âIâm gonna kill them myself!âÂ
âDonât worry, I already hounded my brother!â You call out after her, sighing as Yuri shakes her head with a smile. âShe gets like that when sheâs really worried, huh.âÂ
âYeah..â Your friend leans to look around you, noticing the basket left alone on the ground. âAnd if sheâs super fired up, she drops everything and doesnât stop until itâs handled. Clearly.âÂ
Maybe both older siblings really are similar.Â
The firestorm of an interruption seemed to break the tension in the room, with all of you finally relaxing and catching up. When they ask you questions, you answer what you can.Â
And when you divulge information that has your ears burning, their squeals and yells give you whole new reasons to live.Â
â
â
After a very comforting lunch Yuriâs mom cooked, you head to the bathroom when your phone suddenly vibrates through your palm.
Huh? Thatâs weird. You expect the name on your screen to be Taehyung, not Yoongi.Â
Not that itâs a bad thing. Youâve been waiting to hear from him, so this is a pleasant surprise.Â
Closing the door to the guest bathroom, you gaze at the calming sage decor with a smile. âHi, how did itââ
âYouâre coming over later, right?â
Oh, shit. Is he okay?
âYes, baby,â you respond with a soothing lilt, ears perked and body on high alert.Â
Does he think you arenât anymore? You both decided on the plans earlier. Surely he knows youâd never just flake on him. âIâm coming back once youâre done with work, remember?â
Thereâs an uncomfortable pause on the line, which makes your boyfriendâs next question jab you so far in the lungs you canât breathe,
ââŠCan it be now?â
Shit.Â
Just like Jia earlier, you drop every plan you have to the wayside. Youâre sure that Taehyung will understand, and you already got through the biggest conversation you needed to with your friends.Â
âOf course,â you whoosh out. âLemme just say bye and Iâll go.âÂ
âTake your time.â A small shuffling interrupts. âItâll take me a bit to get back.âÂ
âOkay. See you there.âÂ
The strained urgency in his voice makes your hair stand on end, so you vacate the bathroom to inform the girls that you gotta goâbut not without a quick head tilt towards Dom, who follows you outside and into the afternoon sun. Â
â
â
You wait until youâre next to your car on the street, turning with a concerned expression and jittery nerves, âWhatâs up with you? Did I do something wrong?â
Turns out, you read Dominique correctly. Her jaw locks before loosening, and it reminds you of the time she confronted you about Yoongi before. God, how much has changed since then. That feels like ages and ages ago.Â
âItâs not about you,â your best friend clears the air and the tightness in your shoulders. âIâm just.. Glad he came around.â
âYoongi?â When Dom nods, you blink. âWait, what?â
âAt your house that night.. After he left your room, we hadâI dunno, a heart-to-heart.â She sighs, flicking braids over her shoulder. You note to compliment the beads she chose this time, because they remind you of summer and simpler times. âI mightâve pressured him a bit, and.. I think he wanted to tell me that he loved you. All the way back then.âÂ
Something in your heart stutters, and you can only repeat your last question, âWhat?â
âYeah. Something about needing to do something first,â she continues, holding your gaze with perfect brows furrowed in sunlight. âBut I could tell he was damn serious about whatever it was. And if he was willing to do it for you? I let it go.âÂ
Your mind whirls.Â
Yoongi was already in love with you back then? Is that why he needed to let you go? To deal with whatever he had to do?Â
One side of you breaks thinking he had to go through all that alone; the other side is screaming at his past self for not even giving you a choice. What did he go through? What did he have to do?
Now you really have to see him. Immediately.Â
âThank you, Dom,â you rush out while opening your door. âIâm just happy itâs over.â
âThe hell itâs not.â Shooting you a glare that heats the oncoming breeze, she reminds, âItâs not over until your brother knows. And based on everything thatâs happened? That conversation is not gonna go over well.âÂ
A dark, simmering boil starts in your stomach, and youâre already feeling queasy again. Tightening your door handle, you gulp hard. âI know.âÂ
âTrust me, Iâm happy for you both. I am.â Both hands find her hips as she levels a gaze that you really, really donât enjoy. âBut Iâm gonna be honest, I think this is gonna ruin their friendship for good.âÂ
Both of your lungs clamp shut.Â
âPlease donât say that,â you beg, âIâm gonna fight for all of us. I will.âÂ
âI donât doubt that, babe. Hey, uh uh, come here.â Reaching out, she gives you a tight hug just when you feel fragile again.Â
âListen to me. I donât doubt that,â she says into your shoulder. âIâm just here to be realistic. Just donât be shocked if thatâs how it goes. Weâll be here for you no matter what, too.âÂ
âOkay,â you say with a scrunched face into her scent. God, she always smells so good, and itâs almost enough to calm you down. Almost almost almost. âThank you. But Iâm not giving up.âÂ
âThatâs my girl.â She squeezes you one more time. âI love you.âÂ
With eyes searing over, you choke and grip her tighter. âI love you, too.âÂ
â
â
Yoongiâs door warms your back as you wait for him to show.Â
But thereâs a good chance it can just be your volcanic anxiety.Â
Ever since your arrival, youâve paced, youâve gnawed on your lips, youâve had to shake the nerves out of your hands.Â
And over and over, youâve strained your neck to look for your favorite cat, because you could sincerely use even a glimpse of her right now.Â
While she doesnât end up showing, Yoongi rounds the nearest corner minutes after your last desperate scan.Â
Fuck, heâs so handsome.Â
Even now, as he simply walks toward you with a backpack slung over his shoulder, you watch with undying yearning to feel those flowing bangs over his forehead. Youâd even settle for a single touch of his cheeks, one of them currently sporting a thin bandage.
But the closer Yoongi gets, the quicker your admiration morphs into concern. Thereâs a deep bend in his brows that you canât decipher, and his fist is balled pretty tight.Â
Seriously, what happened? He looks so troubled that you slowly push off the doorway to ask,Â
âBaby, whatâsââ
A bag hits the ground before youâre swooped into a kiss so electric your lips spark.Â
Him. Him, him, and more him. For the love of everything you donât understand whatâs happening but you kiss Yoongi back with everything you have, arms slinging around his strong shoulders and tugging him closer because he clearly needed this.Â
And fuck if you didnât need it just as much. Screw it if anyone sees you. This is all you want and youâll stay right here until he pulls away.Â
When he finally does, both of you swallow to catch your breaths, and your soul glimmers when his forehead meets yours.Â
âHi, baby,â you whisper to his exhales. âMissed you, too.â
Silent, your lover kisses your forehead before hugging you close, and youâre more sure of your prediction than ever. Something is bothering him.Â
He doesnât look worse, at least. But thereâs clearly something off and heâs not hiding it. His lack of words is loud enough.Â
âLetâs go inside,â you quietly suggest. âI wouldâve gone in already but I donât have a key.â
He nods, fishing out his keyring to let you both inside.Â
When you set your bags down and slip off your shoes, itâs only seconds before youâre softly pulled into a hug again, surprising yet so, so welcoming.Â
Even only after a few hours, youâve missed the fuck out of him. Which makes all of this an outright dream.Â
âSorry,â Yoongi finally murmurs against your shoulder. âI justâŠâ
âNothing to be sorry for.â You stroke a hand along his hair, massaging his scalp and loving how soft it feels. The windswept strands fall back into place as you keep running your fingers through. âDid you at least get your appointment?â
âYeah, I did.â He buries his face further. âNothing bad. Just canât lift anything heavy for a couple days.â
âGood. Thatâs easy to manage,â you whisper back into his tee, feeling the chill of lingering air conditioning and body warmth all at once. âIs something else bothering you?â
âNot exactly.â Whatever that means. âIâll tell you about it later. Just wanted this, and you.â
Oh. ThatâsâŠÂ
âIâm here now, love,â you assure with a melting heart, wondering what happened to cause this behavior.Â
Is it because of last night? Or something that happened today? Youâre anxious all over again, but from the way Yoongiâs acting, your worries are second to his. âHave you eaten yet?â
He shakes his head, only pulling you closer with not a word from his lips.Â
And from this point on, you make a silent vow to yourself. Whatever Yoongi needs, youâre going to take care of him.Â
No matter what, these next few days are all about himâa minuscule sacrifice in comparison to everything heâs done for you, whether you knew about it or not.
âIâll make you something then. Come on.âÂ
When you walk, you slip your hand down his arm to hold his hand, and your lead into his kitchen is short.Â
âAny requests?â You cheerfully ask as you spare a smile over your shoulder. âWe can do⊠Something lightâŠâ
Only to see him staring back with nothing but a lingering sense of longing.
Okay.Â
You need to get to the bottom of this now.Â
Stopping right over linoleum, you leave no room for arguments, âYoongi. Tell me whatâs wrong.â
He blinks before his gaze meets the floor. So youâre confused when he simply, quietly..Â
Laughs?Â
âItâs not that somethingâs wrong,â he slowly starts, a shy smile carving his features. âFor the first time in my life, nothingâs wrong.âÂ
Your heart beats extra loud.Â
âBut itâs too much to explain right now.â His eyes rise to meet yours. âJust know that Iâm so in love with you.âÂ
Oh.
âAnd I want you to know that every day I live.â
Fuck.
Your body responds before you can say anything, lips connecting to remove any need for speech. The knowledge of them all staring death in the face last night makes this confession sear your insides, and you canât help but kiss him like youâll never get to again.Â
Yanking him back, you spin on your heel until he flings into the kitchen, clutching your wrists before gripping your jaw with both hands.Â
His mouth heats on yours, his glasses the only barrier between your skin. Everything sizzles from your head to your toes, and you both bang into a countertop beforeâ
âFuck, ouch.â
âShit, you okay?â
Yoongi rubs his side with one eye pinched shut, a corner of his teeth present. âYeah. Worth it, though.â
âBe serious,â you reprimand. Looks like heâs gonna have to take it easy, which means no going at it like animals until heâs on the mend. âNo more until you feel better, yeah?â
âSays who?â
âBabe.â
His deadly pout almost breaks your resolve. âFine.âÂ
But you can wait. Youâre sure it wonât take long, and for this man? Youâll wait however long you need to.Â
Besides, thereâs plenty of things you can do in the meantime that donât require running into hard objects.Â
âGood. Now letâsâŠâ You turn away to get started before youâre held, and pulled back into yet another embrace.Â
What the hell is happening today? Your lungs and your melting pile of a brain can only take so much. Itâs beautifully overwhelming how Yoongi canât seem to let you go, because youâre the one that always loses control.Â
This whole time, itâs been you that canât hold yourself back.Â
So now? Being on the other side? You donât think you ever want him to restrain himself again.Â
This time, he moves slow. Sensuously slow, and it would occur to you that heâs finding a very cheeky loophole to your plan if you werenât so hazy-eyed.Â
Whatever Yoongiâs doing, you wonât stop him.Â
Your back touches a counter before Yoongi cages you in, and your lips mold together as perfectly as his body does with yours. Your unhurried strokes match his, and your minds communicate without a single word.Â
Thereâs yearning still ever present. But thereâs comfort in abundance, and a whole new level of need.Â
After he pulls away, you can visibly see him drink you in from head to toe.Â
âYou know.. Iâm good holding off on all the other shit.â Pulling you in, his lips curve as he confidently declares, âBut Iâm never gonna stop kissing you.âÂ
His hands, his lips, his words. They all have healing powers, youâre so sure of it. If Yoongi hasnât yet realized his unending pain has blossomed into a safe haven, you need to let him know no matter what,Â
âGood.â
Thereâs still a pining in his eyes, but he lets you free, hand skirting your hip before he walks to his room. âGonna change then Iâll help.âÂ
âYou donât have to, baby,â you say as you struggle to catch your breath. âI got it.âÂ
Three minutes later, heâs chopping an onion anyway.Â
But youâre loving how serene everything feels with the two of you prepping and dicing, thumps of knives on wood intertwining in sound before you laugh at his crying over the pesky vegetable. Maybe if he wore contacts instead of specs, heâd be better off.Â
Not that his choice of eyewear is what youâre complaining about. But those glasses paired with the cream tees heâs been wearing? There will be hell to pay as soon as you get a chance at revenge.Â
Your pot is set to boil for a bit, so you finally rest against the counter and start a timer on his microwave. âGo ahead,â you gesture to your very handsome cooking partner. âYou can sit now.â
âHuh? Weâre not done yet.â
âOh.â Blinking, you tilt your head in confusion because you couldâve sworn you heard him yawn a couple times. âYou arenât tired?â
âI am,â he says before squeezing his eyes, rapid blinks to follow. âBut Iâm fine here.â
You toss and turn the food around, sprinkling a little more seasoning and hearing the bubbles and fizzes. When you stir a little more, a sudden thought occurs, halting your movements and spinning you around,Â
âAre you staying there to watch my ass.â
Yoongiâs slow smile gives everything away, but he also makes up for the blatant staring.Â
âCanât deny thatâs one of the things.â Pushing off the sink, he stands right next to you, slotting a hand behind your neck and angling you for a kiss. âBut I meant it earlier. I justâŠâ
Youâre completely silent as you watch him slide his eyes from your face to the sizzling food. Whatever heâs thinking about, youâre gonna give him all the room to talk.Â
âJust like being where you are.âÂ
How you went from almost running out of his door to here, you arenât quite sure. But youâre grateful for that split second of him deciding to fight for the two of you instead of against, because you really were going to leave.Â
And you may have taken much, much longer to even try going back.Â
Your voice is barely heard over the aromatic smell and fizzle, âGood thing I like having you around.â When he smiles again, you let out a breath of a giggle, going back to shuffling the pan around and tilting your head to the fridge. âI put some fruit in there if you wanna eat that, too.â
âIâm down.â
âK.â
Your food is ready soon enough, and the two of you eat while talking about easy topics. Like work and your workplace dynamics, what Yoongiâs team has been working on at the studio.Â
At one point, your curiosity about the album release party grows from something he says. âSpeaking of. The partyâs on Friday, right?â
âYeah.â
âOkay, I thought so,â you deflate, setting your bowl down on the table. âSorry he canât go.â
âHuh?â
Your body stills. âWait. Did he not say anything? About his trip being extended?â
So much for nothing in his life being wrong. From the lost look on his face, you may have given him another reason to fold back in on himself. âNo.. No, he didnât.â
Both of you sit in silence.Â
This could be nothing. Right? That means your brother is confident he can make it so thereâs no point in telling Yoongi heâs gonna miss it. Or maybe heâs not trying hard enough and then not being able to say it to his face?Â
âIâm sorry,â you apologize. âI thought he told you.â
âItâs okay.â Clearly itâs not. âNot much to do about it now.â
âYoongi⊠What if he knows?â At your own question, you stiffen, curling into a proverbial ball. Fear and the sick backfire of fibbing has your mouth going drier than desert air. âWhat if he actually knows?â
Setting down his chopsticks, Yoongi looks your way, eyes unreadable behind his specs. âIf he did, do you think heâd leave us alone?â
Heâs got a point. âGuess not.âÂ
âMm.â Flicking his eyes to the window, he adjusts uncomfortably in his chair. âAnd I dunno if I mentioned this, but.. He thinks I got back with my ex.â
âFuck, really?âÂ
âThatâs the real reason why he hasnât been talking to me. Maybe he thinks sheâs gonna be there on Friday.â
âOh.â Your shoulders sag, and sag. Not owning up to your relationship is one thing; Yoongi having to dwell in his previous relationship is another. âIs that⊠worse?â
âShit.â Reaching across wood, you close your hand around his fingers for support. Itâs the only thing you can think to do. At least, itâs what you would want if you were in his shoes. âI think you should tell him she wonât be.â
A million seconds later, Yoongi thankfully agrees. âYeah, I will.â
You feel better. Somewhat. At least a little less nauseous about the possibility of your brother knowing.Â
But it still sucks knowing that heâs actively avoiding Yoongi because of an ex he used to have.Â
How bad was it back then if this is the case? What exactly happened? Is this why Yoongi went radio silent on you for weeks?
It seems like he doesnât even wanna talk about her. So you wonât pry just yet, as much as you wanna know every single thing sheâs done wrong so you can hound her through every timeline in existence.Â
Instead, you talk about a much better subject,Â
âWe should feed my cat now.â
And you quickly laugh at the saucy glint in Yoongiâs eyes.Â
â
â
Everything is set where it needs to be. Sugarâs food and water fill their respective bowls, your shoulder leans into Yoongiâs good side, and his arm rests around your back as heâs propped up by his banged up doorway.Â
You remember the first time you saw him lean against the wood like this. Only that time, you were a shell of a girl, waiting with shaky breaths and shaken confidence to hear his response to your inappropriate request.Â
Who wouldâve thought that youâd be on the same side as him all these months later? In his arms, resting a head on his warm chest?Â
When you let out a short chuckle, Yoongi turns to your smile. âHmm?âÂ
âNothing,â you wisp out. âJust thinking about us.âÂ
His fingers press into your side a fraction more, and you can feel him lift his head again. âMe, too.âÂ
Umm.Â
You can say things like that. He isnât allowed!Â
Youâre about to set some one-sided rules before your gift pops out of the bushes a few feet away.Â
âMy baby!â you quietly call, leaving Yoongiâs side to crouch down. âCome here, love. You hungry?â
She cautiously makes her way over, sniffing your hand when you leave it outstretched. After careful consideration, the little one nudges your palm, letting you glide fingers down her back as she approaches her bowls.Â
âYouâre so tiny,â you observe with slight pity. âWeâll get you well fed in no timeââ
âHey, Sugar! Oh, is this her? Sheâs gorgeous, no wonder!â
Huh? Sugar?Â
Who else knows the catâs name already?
Your neck almost strains when you look up to see whoâs talking. When you notice an older lady donning a really comfy, fluffy robe, you feel like it looks super familiar before you stand.Â
âHi,â you greet before introducing yourself, extending your hand and shaking the womanâs soft, delicate fingers. âSorry if we were too loud.â
âCall me Miss Dion. And you werenât too loud this time, sweetie,â she says with a wink, glancing down at the kitty eating what you laid out. âWas just cominâ out to water my plants so itâs good to see youâre here, too. Looks like he finally got some sense back in that head of his.â
âIâm standing right here, you know.â
âOh, I know!â
Back? How long has she known about you? Do her and Yoongi actually converse regularly? Their banter is⊠Really adorable.Â
Itâs making you fall even more in love with the man biting his cheek in amusement.Â
Wait.Â
Is Yoongi Sugar?Â
That is so fucking cute you could cry.Â
âIâm back to take care of this guy,â you explain with a head tilt. âAnd the little one, of course.âÂ
Itâs when you say this that Miss Dion notices the bandages on Yoongiâs face, concern pushing down her brows. âWhat happened to you, young man?â
âNothing to worry about.âÂ
âYou sure? I got some ointment in my kitchen somewhereââ
âItâs all goodââ
âWeâll take it,â you cut him off, not looking but feeling his stare on your face. âHow much do we owe you?âÂ
âOh, donât you worry about that.â With a snuff at Yoongi and a smile your way, Miss Dion heads inside to fetch a bottle.
In the meantime, you give your lover a quiet stare before bending down to run your hands over soft fur.Â
âPapa Sugar is gonna need that so he canât argue,â you coo to your cat, cheekily ignoring Yoongiâs sputtering puff of air above your head.
âPapa Sugar? Really?â
You glance up to his smile with a mischievous one of your own. âWhat, you wanna be Sugar Daddy instead?â
The swirl in your belly is instant. Because Yoongi can only look out into the distance, biting his lip and failing to hide his grin.
Sigh. If only he didnât have those injuries across his face. Youâd push him back into the door and slam it shut if it was any other day.Â
Patience, patience, patience.Â
Those hits arenât gonna heal with just one round of gauze.Â
When you have to replace the cotton patches, at least youâll have something to help.Â
â
â
Itâs not until youâre about to tuck in for the night that Yoongi approaches your side of the bed. Judging by the headphones slung around his neck, heâs about to work, so you assume heâs just coming to give you a kiss goodnight.Â
But after he does exactly that, he asks you a question that warms your chest,Â
âWhereâs your keys.âÂ
âIn there,â you motion to the nearest wall, bag propped right under his windowsill. âInside pocket, I think.âÂ
Yoongi bends with a prolonged grunt, slowly rummaging until he finds your jangling keyring with its charms. When he grabs it, he silently sits on the edge up against your stomach, body heat permeating your tee while he fiddles with the clasps.Â
God, youâre so in trouble. You know exactly what heâs doing.Â
Unlike the last time he offered you complete access to his place, this time he didnât even hesitate. And the way he secures a key amongst the loop, itâs his silent way of cementing permanence.Â
Thatâs not another key for you to borrow.
Because that key is yours.
â
â
continued in angel, pt. 2
pitstop inbox before pt2!! | join the server!
a/n: holy crap we're doing it we are actually back in the main storyline?! how do we feel right now because i am over the damn moon diving into this story again. here's a slight pitstop before you make your way over to part two (THE CONTINUATION IS IN A REBLOG!) so take a breather before heading into the resttttttt
++ feedback box:
â„ of course, any reblogs/comments/messages are appreciated!
â„ for the ones that are too shy to reblog with a review, comment on this, or send a message, i went ahead and made another anonymous form where you can send in what you think!
â„ no emails collected, no need to put in a username. itâs literally just a comment dropbox :D feedback can be as short/sweet or as long as youâd like!
â„ here!
++ more links:
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a/n 2: we did this for 3tanfugue and the energy was great! just like last time, some of you guys suggested that we have post goals to encourage interaction. no one voted against it yet, so we'll keep it goin!
note goal: since we're back in main storyline, upping the goal! 1,000 notes is the goal, so when we hit that, 3tan14 will be dropped as soon as it's done! thank you all for reading and would love to hear any thoughts: what did you like about the chapter? how did a certain scene make you feel? what are you excited to see next? any shares, comments, tags, and reblogs with commentary count, and i appreciate anything you guys have to say.