I have such a fear that I am NOT REALLY PLURAL just FAKING IT.
I know I have trauma. I know I’m not faking my trauma. My trauma happened as a child and I’ve been like this for as long as I can remember.
But sometimes I hear about other people’s trauma and I feel like mine is not enough to complain about or to be affected by. I was never struck or beaten or r*ped.
I have to remind myself daily that it’s ok to feel like you’re not enough. Those feelings are valid and need to be addressed, not obsessed. Despite not being a victim of CSA or physical abuse, I was still a victim of psychological and mental abuse. (I grew up in a death/doomsday cult.)
It’s hard but that’s ok. It’s hard but I can make it. I’ve made it this far. I cried on my 19th birthday because I thought I would never make it past 18. I’m actually thankful for my headmates. I wouldn’t be alive if not for them. No matter how many alters want to die, there is going to be at least one who wants to stay alive.
This is kind of just a rant so feel free to ignore.
TL;DR DID and OSDD are characteristically hard to spot. Your own brain doesn’t want you to know about what happened to you, so your own brain is going to try and convince you that you’re not really a system. And that’s ok! Imposter syndrome is super hard to overcome and it’s never ending, but you can do it! We believe in you!
-Mercury, Kade, and Izuku
