We hit 400 so hereās a- āØ DREAM APPRECIATION ESSAY āØ
(by Yours Truly. Much thanks to the one, innocent anon who just wanted to ask a small talk question but hit my serotonin-providing hyperfixation.)
1. Self-esteem
I love the way heās confident in his abilities when itās become such a ātrendā to either be completely and utterly self-depricating about your own skills out of fear of being labelled an asshole or overconfident nowadays.
At the same time you can still tell he doesnāt want to pull anyone down ever, and will always be really careful with that and take every oppertunity to lift up the people around him. Dream has a very emotional voice that gives him away a lot, so you can really tell he genuinely admires the people around him and heās never afraid to say that they could totally easily beat him in something if he doesnāt have practice with it.
He tends to be a bit too hard on himself, so his friends always encourage him in his abilities, and thatās just. So nice. He celebrates his victories! He gets so so excited and happy when he wins in the manhunts, and I think celebrating your hard-earned victories isnāt something that should be villanized.
He won, and we should KNOW by now that doesnāt mean he thinks heās somehow better than everyone. He has a pretty good eye on his abilities, and that allows him to really use them to the max.
2. Morality
He isnāt afraid to change the game! His adhd picks out a Cool New Thing and he just goes, You know what? Why not! His adhd goes ādo this thing repeatedly another 3847 timesā and heās like, yeah sure!
Nobody expected him to release a song, but he just went for it! Heās been speedrunning so much, but he isnāt afraid to stream it every day 5 days in a row for hours while his friends bicker in the background.
Dream genuinely does the things he finds fun, but at the same time puts in so much effort to make them good and entertaining to watch and never forgets about his viewers.
Heās kidfriendly because he wants to be! Fame-wise, at this point he could definitly swear more if he wanted to (and he does when in other peopleās content who donāt care about swearing), but despite that he doesnāt swear on his main because he wants his content to be accessable for everyone.
Sure, on one hand it could be for clout/money, but consider: Dream doesnāt stream the DSMP because he doesnāt want to take attention away from other people. He participates in the videos of his friends. He lets compilation channels and the like do whatever they want and even monetize his content. He lets his friends stream Road Trip on twitch as much as they want for free.
Dream doesnāt not swear just for his fanbase, but he does it because he has so so much respect for people. No matter how high he goes, heās always consciously focused on respecting and admiring the people around him.
He has genuine respect for creators so much smaller than him, and he has respect for people in his fanbase that are younger than him. He isnāt afraid to go against the norm and STAND for that, either (see the video where he defends his stans).
And he defends his friends so much too! So much so it could almost be a little bit of a flaw sometimes, but I feel like he truly wants to learn from his mistakes. He apologizes for things even when nobody asked him to, and that just shows that he does it out of genuine guilt and fear of hurting someone.
Heās always seemed like someone who is genuinely willing to change to be a better version of himself, who isnāt afraid to challenge what he thinks and what other people think and what the norm thinks in order to improve everything for everyone.
Dream also doesnāt let any of the fame get to his head! As I said before - heās confident in the things heās good at, but in a way that doesnāt pull other people down, and he still remains firmly admirable of other people.
And even when OTHER people let fame get to their head (it was a while ago, but there was a video he made about five block jumps, where he added in a clip of a video of another guy doing it complete with credit and link etc. The guy was 100% alright with it at first, but when his video started getting more views because Dreamās video blew up, he started accusing Dream of āstealingā his content (when dozens of other videos of the 5 block jump already existed, and Dream couldāve just put in a clip of himself doing the jump)),,, but he insisted in his reponse that fame gets to peopleās heads sometimes, nobody should blame anybody, he genuinely was never upset at him and just said that this just... happens sometimes.
Heās a very forgiving person all around, in part due to being willing to challenge his own norms and give people the benefit of the doubt JUST in case heās wrong. He lets people enjoy things so long as they arenāt hurting anybody, like allowing people to ship him w people who are also alright with shipping, but at the same time taking a hard stance on, say, how shipping minors is absolutely wrong and should not be done ever (and heās right).
3. Fandom
He appreciates said fanart and fanworks as well! He thinks dnf fanart is cool and he even appreciates the fanfic part of his fandom, something many ccs wish to ignore or forget it exists altogether (and it IS ofc in their right to do so or be uncomfortable with such content!), but Dream sees the work put into it and how people find connections and friendships through the fandom and appreciates it all the same.
He loves his fandom. So much. But not in the overdone, fake-feeling way Iāve seen other ccs be,,,, heās just. Quiet and shy and genuine about it but not afraid to defend it.
Heās said before - and I QUOTE - āIf you send hate to people or have sent hate to people, in the form of hateful comments or DMs, you arenāt welcome in my fandom. Youāre no fan of mineā, which is the HOTTEST take heās ever uttered and I love that. He really just went and said that. And heās right. I like that despite how heās usually more held back and waits things out before taking a stance, he chose this topic to really take a hard stance on and not budge and stick to it.
Pmbata has also said that he believes his fans have his back no matter what!! And that he really loves them a lot!!! And I am!! Emotional!!!!
4. ND/Adhd
He has adhd which is something I relate to personally (I have it as well sdlkfj). He gets excited sometimes!! I love how he shows being fidgety in mc, always pacing and parcouring around,, the way that in manhunts you can SEE when heās thinking or bouncing back and forth between two options,,, or the way he gets close to people in mc to laugh with them.... He shows so much with his movements by them being quick and daring and calculated (and itās especially hilarious to watch other people react to it in the video āmc but three people control one playerā, where heās the one moving and Sapnap and George will gasp or go āDream!!ā in surprise when Dream was THIS close to falling off a ledge, but he just laughs sdlkfjsdf).
When heās not moving around he stands perfectly, perfectly still (which, idk if thats what all adhd ppl have, but I know I have something similar? Like when Iām nervous Iāll sometimes just. Freeze in place. No movement at all). Heās just relatable sdkjf.
There was one Manhunt extra scenes where he,,,,, stims by clapping,,,,,, the lil excited clap in the background,,, Iām gonna cry. Iām so soft for excited Dream that one is such a comfort clip for me!
He also tends to stim by getting under trap doors and then jumping back out of them, or jumping up a block and then walking back down over and over (especially noticable in The Village Went Mad tftsmp episode, where they were all discussing who the murderer could be and he was the only one moving, hopping up the log and then running back down again).
Also it is. Really Soft when he starts rambling and overexplaining something. Whatās even better is that George, who is usually present at such moments, will laugh a little at his antics, and Dream will automatically laugh with him.
5. Rp/Uplifting other ccs
Dream wasnāt all THAT into the rp at first, but his server has been so strongly supporting and giving attention to smaller creators that heās since completely rolled along with it. Being a villain in the RP is a difficult role because you will, inevitable, as much as it is just roleplay and all scripted, always get some amount of dislike from people for it.
Despite that, heās basicly the main big villain on his own server where he let a bunch of theater kids beat him up in character and imprison him on his OWN SERVER. He wasnāt as into the rp at first, but has obviously been practicing and joins every Tales of the SMP when he can, despite getting zero clout for it.
What Dream also tends to do is find small content creators, see their talent and lift them high. His entire discord server is dedicated to give smaller ccs a place to grow, and when he first found Tubbo, Tommy, Ranboo, etc., they were much much smaller than they are now. He truly wanted to help them make it big.
Heās also added Foolish Shark and Hannah onto the SMP, both much smaller ccs (not tiny, but you get what I mean), allowing them to grow. He doesnāt stream on his OWN SERVER. He let himself get imprisoned to let the good guys win on his OWN. SERVER. Heās willing to play the villain and everything.
An interesting thing though! A lot of people used to/still do clown on Dream a bit for his sometimes uncertain acting,,, but when heās around people he knows well (Sapnap and George, Tubbo and Tommy) weāve seen him go ALL OUT. I have the theory Dream might be genuinely afraid to accidentally be mean to someone in character and have them misinterpret it sldkfjsdf,,, so heās rly careful when he goes into the rp, and sometimes even when heās in it he goes quiet, especially with other people around.
But also the fact that he needs time to feel comfortable around ppl is,, a mood,,, and adorable,,, sdlfkjsdf-
Apparently heās also shared his youtube algorithm secrets with Tommy?? Which he had only shared with Sapnap and George before?? Dream took one look at that chaotic kid and immedietly adopted him as his little brother. He literally got up super early to rp the prison visit. Idk about yaāll but I would die for someone first and get up horribly early for them second-
6. Friends!!
Dream?? Considers so so many people his friends?? And despite having so many friends, he also has his few closest friends (George and Sapnap) whom he would absolutely die for in a heartbeat. He WILL defend them with everything he has and loves them so so much.
He listens to them and really, truly wants them to succeed. He respects them so much and will go OFF about how good they actually are and how talented they are and how important they are to him.
I canāt even COVER everything about how much he is SOULMATES with Gorg. They live in each others heads rent-free. He mentions him all the time. They get!! So happy when theyāre around each other!!! Their voices get so soft,,
And I canāt even BEGIN to explain the energy of Sapnap and Dream just moving together permanently. Imagine moving together with your best friend. Like, permanently. Into one house. Theyāre best friends Your Honor,,,,
Also,, remember the Techno and Dream rivalry? And Dream has recently said that heās hesitant to make a serious manhunt against Techno because he doesnāt want there to be any feud between them or have them be compared to each other. He said that while he absolutely wanted nothing more than to beat Techno at first, now that he knows him better he just wants to be friends with him. He wants to be FRIENDS. With his, essentially, mc RIVAL. Friendly rival, but still. He doesnāt even wanna fight Techno or have ppl compare them cause he,,, wants to be friends with him,,,,
7. Vulnerability
What I feel like really sets Dream apart from some other ccs for me is that heās willing to be vulnerable. He will tell George he loves him. He defends his friends. He sounds so, so genuine when he tells his fandom that he loves them.
Whatās just really rare to see, especially in male ccs, is that vulnerability. Itās becoming more acceptable as time goes on, but itās certainly not easy, and a lot of people become and stay long-term fans BECAUSE they can see how genuine he is.
I know Dream looks up to Mr. Beast a lot, for example, but honestly? I think heās a little better than Mr. Beast. Because he feels more genuine, more bound to what he believes is right. Iām sure Mr. Beast isnāt a bad content creator! But ultimately they have different target audiences and Iām very glad Dream is the way he is.
Less of that insecure masculinity and more willing to be vulnerable, to care about things, to get emotional and to encourage and uplift the people around him.
8. Pure Brainrot
Green boi has nice deep calm soothing voice. Little shy laugh. Wheeze laugh. Gorg live in his head rent-free. He lov friends. He lov block game. He good at block game,,, a little shy but confident,,, big heart,,,, soft voice,,,,, rambles sometimes....
He also Gender. Heās so gender. I donāt know how else to describe it. I want That. Whatever That is. My gender is Dreamwastaken
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Eddie has undiagnosed ADHD. The reason he still hasnāt graduated school is because of his inability to focus and prioritize. He has zero organizational skills and was often in trouble for being rowdy in class. Reading is difficult for him because heās easily distracted and becomes frustrated with the task. His uncle used to tell him as a kid that he wouldĀ āleave his head on the bus if it wasnāt attachedā because he often forgot where he put things. He often suffers from anxiety over not being able to do the things required or expected of him and turns to weed in order to deal with that. Since his parents were absent and his uncle wasnāt exactly paternal in nature, Eddie never saw a counselor to learn coping skills.
|| *emerges from coffin* I thought I'd be out of my obsessive cycles with my meds and yet here I am. Totally obsessing over Fever Dream by Palaye Royale. I can't listen to anything else and it's been FIVE DAYS. I CAN'T FOCUS ON WORK BECAUSE I WANT TO LISTEN TO THE ALBUM, IF I LISTEN TO THE ALBUM I CAN ONLY PAY ATTENTION TO REMINGTON'S VOICE. GODS THRICE CURSE THIS.
I think atomoxetine either doesn't help or I need a bigger dose. š
- He notices quickly that thereās something wrong, so he makes an effort to make sure you take your medication
- He makes an effort to understand your ADHD and schizophrenia, which means heāll even take you to a psychologist, even though it makes him slightly worried that you might get taken from him
1p Prussia/Gilbert Beilschmidt
- He does not understand the whole mental illness thing, so when you get symptoms he doesnāt know what to do, but eventually he gets his shit together and does research on your mental illnesses
- He buys your medication for you because he doesnāt want to allow someone to take you from him
2p Prussia/Gilen Beilschmidt
- He gets it, he knows how it feels to struggle with mental illnesses, since he has depression, so he does everything in his power to help you
- He offers to take you to see a psychologist, heāll even sit there with you if it makes you feel more comfortable. Of course heās worried youāll be taken away, but your mental health is more important
1p Scotland/Allistor Kirkland
- He does not understand your mental illnesses either, at first he thinks youāre faking it to get away from him, but eventually he sees that itās very real
- He tries his best to help you remember your medication and he tries to lay low on his sadistic behaviour for you
Man trying to personally build and maintain a work ethic and discipline with ADHD is freaking impossible
Like my two options are to either get a job evert few months that forces me onto a random damaging work ethic that doesn't work with my ADHD so quiting over and over and over when it exhausts me till i reach my breaking point and try to jump off the window again and again and again
Or the preferred option for anyone that has ADHD is starting your own business and trying you hardest to build a stable work ethic that works WITH your disability and then FORCING yourself to adhere to it which of fucking course doesn't fare well with the ADHD ...
Starting somthing a sitting down is the worst but i realized that starting on a small thing and finishing it brings in more motivation to make bigger things but also the extreme focus and 100 thoughts bouncing around in my head while being forced by ADHD to use every muscle in my body to concentrate is exhasting and makes strating work again the next day the worst thing in the universe (thus making me fall into a loop of executive dysfunction) cause i always end up with mucles that are sore and mean a headache and my brain DOES NOT AND WILL NOT willingly go into that again gaaah this is exhausting and scary
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āNothing can stop you if you really want to write.ā
False. Factoid actually just a statistical error. Neurotypical Writer Georg, who lives in a cave and writes over 10000 words each day no matter what, is an outlier and should not have been counted.
Now, hereās why I have issues with that first statement:
Plenty of things can and probably will stop you from writing even if you really, really want to, and that is not your fault. So you should not be made to feel bad about it.
Many writers have anxiety, depression, adhd, or other mental health issues just to name a few. Or, you know what, maybe theyāre just tired or having an off day. But just because theyāre afraid, or something threw them off their rhythm, or they canāt find the motivation/focus to write, or they require certain conditions that may seem arbitrary to you but not to them in order to write (solid deadlines, the ability to type, whatever) doesnāt mean theyāre any less of a writer, nor does it mean they have no desire or passion to write in them or arenāt trying hard enough.
Yes, sometimes you have to push yourself. Sometimes itās as simple as picking up a pen and paper and just writing and powering through. But sometimes, itās not. Mental barriers are just as solid as physical barriers.
Youāre allowed to take a break. Youāre allowed to lose focus. Youāre allowed to write on your own time on your own terms. Even if those terms seem odd or meaningless to someone else. And youāre allowed to be frustrated.
You are allowed every single one of those things while still holding the desire to write, and while still calling yourself a writer. Professional or not.
Do you think I want to jump between several hundred projects each week? Do you think I wouldnāt kill to have the ability to just sit down and write just like that? Computer or pencil? Finishing one story before moving onto the next and meeting my self-imposed deadlines, no strings attached? Because I would.
But some peopleās brains work differently.
And itās not a matter of soldiering on. Itās not a matter of passion. Or deadlines. Or āIf you really want X, youād do X.ā
No, I canāt write every day. No, I canāt write if certain conditions are off. And thatās okay! Would I like to? Of course. Will my all over the map brain let me? Not a chance. I have tried countless times, countless routines, countless self disciplines, all for nought. Because that doesnāt work for me. Not for a lack of trying. And what does work for you will not work for others. Weāre not all Stephen King. And weāre not all Neurotypical Writer Georg. Personally, a lot of things have the power to throw my hyper-focus for a loop, and when that happens, I get discouraged and lost. I canāt just get that focus back with the snap of my fingers. Iāll float aimlessly for a while, angry with myself, telling myself the same thing other people have told me endless times before:
āNothing can stop you if you really want to write.ā
Maybe for some people, this is true.
But hereās the thing, writing is what I love to do. I want to write so freaking badly, you have no idea. *See me clenching my fists, thatās me clenching my fists.* I want to tell the stories I have to tell. And I love every single one of my hundred+ projects. No, sometimes I canāt bring myself to concentrate on them. No, sometimes I canāt bring myself to write without a computer or some other ridiculous restriction. I know it sounds ridiculous. Believe me. I canāt change it though. But to be told I donāt want to write them at all because of this? is ludicrous.
I know you like adhd!Ronan as well (I personally like adhd Gansey and adhd Ronan, but that's just meš¤), and here are some adhd Ronan headcanons based on my own experiences with adhd:
He hates fitted clothes. They make him feel like hes suffocating, and prefers baggy tshirts. Can't get him to wear layers for the same reason, and it makes him feel trapped cause it makes it tight around his shoulder.
Keeps boxes. Sometimes to give to Gansey, but just to put stuff in cause it's a nice box.
Gets emotionally attached to inanimate objects, and gets sad when he has to throw them away.
Kinda canon but has so much trouble with controlling his emotions and anything can make him drop into a good or bad mood, and he doesn't know what sets it off sometimes.
RSD hits him hard, which is why it's hard for him to be around Declan, cause usually Declan is just telling things hes messed up at that he already knows, and it can send him into a spiral.
He likes wearing band aids, it's kinda like a weighted stim for him. The squash song is a vocal stim for him. His arm bands and the fact that he chews on them is a stim.
He keeps weird shit in his pockets, I'm talking salt packets from Nino's and he sticks them in other peoples pockets for internment when they are doing something boring, so they will be confused about why theres salt in their pockets later. (Yes I do this, yes it's the funniest fucking thing ever).
Makes noises when they are doing boring things.
Will find something to entertain himself with.
When he's frustrated he drives cause fast vooms make brain go brrrrrr. But basically any reckless behavior can be a part of adhd cause again, it makes brain go brrr, and that's what adhders lack (brrrr = serotonin).
Has hyperfixated on birds at one point so when he dreamed Chainsaw he already knew exactly how to take care of her (weird thing, but years before I read these books I had a cat named Chainsaw who was the most beautiful cat I've ever had, and he was so pretty I am convinced someone stole him.... adhd tangent? On an ask about Ronan being adhd??? Wow....)
Has sat and stared at a wall and thought of the greatest stories of all time only to look away forget everything he thought of.
Paints his nails black, and the only reason I am putting this with adhd is cause it's a visual stim, and pleasing to look at.
Fuck gender. (No seriously, ADHDers are way more likely to hate gender stereotypes cause they just make no sense to our brains).
Long ask is long. If you want why I see Gansey as adhd, please let me know, cause I can and will talk about it given the opportunity.š
Ahhh!! Okay, this is really great! I honestly suspect that Iām somewhere on the ADHD spectrum, but not officially diagnosed, so Iām not sure I could add to this already perfect-seeming list.
I will call out my faves of keeping weird shit in his pockets, as well as Ronanās personal stims like bandaids and the bracelets. Giving Gansey Good Boxes [tm], sometimes with stuff in them feels so right, along with not wearing tight-fitting clothing. I feel like being awake is already something that makes him feel trapped in his own skin, so wearing looser clothes probably makes him feel like he can breathe better. Also fuck gender is a perfect Ronan Lynch mood. I love this, and youāre more than welcome to send me Gansey headcanons as well. I love love love reading stuff about my boy(s).
