#ace help

Why are you awake at 3 a.m mister >:(

SLEEP >:(

I DON'T KNOW I'M SORRY

Ok, I know I typically am the one who gives advice but this time I need it.

I enter a relationship with a heterosexual man recently, he is someone I’ve know for nearly 2 years and when we brought up dating he said he was fine with me being ace. Well lately we’ve been talking about the possibility of marriage. But he and I are worried how our relationship will work when he wants sex and I don’t. As some of you know I am a sex-repulsed ace and have always been worried about being in relationships for that very reason. I really like this guy and he wants to compromise we just don’t know how. I’ll take any help I can get.

Thanks guys,

Reasons

Haven't felt any kinda of real sexual attraction, like they can be pretty and sexy physically feels good but it just ends there

The last time I felt anything close to sexual attraction was with a girl, but I onlyvfelt that when we were together alone I felt nether other then they were a pretty good friend and that they looked good.

the irony is, i used to be one of those exclusionist who tend to not like aces at all. now i think i am ace and this past mindset doesn't really work for good, i feel shitty because now the prejudices i had had reflect on my own identity

So...

I’m ace and I genuinely don’t see anything wrong with it. I know it’s just how some people are. But I just..I don’t want to be ace. I’m sex repulsed and have never been able to get even remotely close to trying it. 

I want to have a nice healthy relationship and it’s so frustrating because I know if I could just do it then I would’ve been able to keep so many good relationship. But I can’t. I feel so broken and I’m frustrated and it’s been leading to so much body dysphoria and the like and I can’t get rid of the feeling that I’m just broken and I want help but I have no idea where I’d even start looking and

I’m tired and scared and just so done with feeling like this

I don’t want to be like this

here is a link that covers a few of the different identities under the ace umbrellahere’s the link in case it doesnt show up on mobile: https://www.glaad.org/amp/ace-guide-finding-your-community

this is worth checking out as wellhttps://www.thetrevorproject.org/trvr_support_center/asexual/#sm.000b8x7netnof3q10vt1ww23h7pmm

This post is for aro terms, but if you replace the romantic part of the word with sexual, it can help you figure out where you fall on the ace spectrum!