#*eris thought exercise

oh baby! my thoughts are that if neris happened as a canon divergence and not an alternate universe, the inner circle only let it get so far because they didn't think nesta would (or could) fall in love with eris. they allowed eris to sweep her off to autumn because they felt assured enough in the strength of her mating bond to cassian that it was a failsafe to ensure she would want to return to him (and thus be back under night court control) of her own volition. the intent was for her to serve in some sort of covert spy capacity and engender a sense of trust between the autumn court and the night court, then they would dangle something else in front of eris—someone powerful and pretty and docile—so that he would grow bored of nesta and discard her of his own volition. because the inner circle fundamentally misunderstands both eris and nesta.

but with her time away from the night court feeling like freedom, and with her social skillset put to such empowering use amongst the autumn court nobility, and with eris proving to be so much more complex than the cruel heir the night court paints him as, nesta finds herself certain that she has no interest in serving as rhysand's pawn—that she is happier with eris than she's been since turning fae—that her bond to cassian doesn't feel nearly as strong as this connection she and eris have forged with intention. and with him seeing nesta for all of her truths and appreciating each one, and with her so seamlessly navigating both the autumn court and his life, and with him and his family finally liberated from his father with her help, eris finds that he no longer just wants to use her for her power—that he has finally found someone he can trust to stand by his side—that he absolutely will not be letting her go, though he never had any intentions to. love consumes them.

this was certainly Not a part of the inner circle's plan. now feyre has lost her sister, cassian has lost his mate, and rhysand has lost a weapon—all because nesta had the audacity to make her own choices. i see it becoming incredibly contentious between all of these actors. i also see eris being incredibly smug about it. about being chosen. about taking from the inner circle. about immediately recognizing their game in using nesta as a pawn and coming out the victor. about seeing nesta true, truer than her own family, her own mate. about knowing that they can't do anything now that he's high lord, not even challenge him to a blood duel. after centuries of enduring their judgment and aspersions, he is finally vindicated.

so when the night court delegation comes to autumn under the pretense of ironing out the terms of the alliance between their courts, nesta has to incentivize eris to let her do most of the talking (yes naturally that gets sexual) and to trust her not to be swayed when [insert member of the inner circle] inevitably corners her alone to get her to come back (this is more a product of his deep-seated sense that no one could ever willingly choose him than a condemnation of her loyalty.) i think when the latter happens, he for sure has eyes and ears in that room somewhere, somehow. probably some charmed item from marius. eris is thoroughly warmed by nesta's conviction and loyalty to him, but he is furious about the way they're speaking to her—made even worse by the way that flame kindled to life inside of her begins to gutter over the course of the conversation. he can't keep his distance at that point, and the night court delegation is very promptly disinvited from their stay at the forest house.

(Additional stressing factor if Loa and Helion's love child is a red haired, fire spirited little girl (Poor Lucinda, Fate was laughing at her face since day one))

very much a bit of both i think! because with lucien, at least he has his maleness as a safeguard, especially in a court like autumn, especially with beron not only as his father figure but as someone who (at minimum) suspects lucien is not his son. at least he always has a relatively secure social standing in that he is a male, which offers him innate protections navigating the court. this isn't even something that would cognitively occur to eris to be grateful for. maybe in passing when he's confronted with the abuse his mother endures under beron—but even then, in most all other ways, loa is untouchable in their court. not included in any actual governance of course, but no male would dare open his mouth against her or make presumptuous advances on her, even if that's just because beron would kill him.

but a sister is so, so much worse. inherently, daughters matter less to beron. they can't become heir, so what's the point in them? even worse—a daughter of his and his wife's blood runs the risk of passing the high lord lineage into someone else's bloodline and out of the vanserra bloodline if she has a baby. add on top of this that beron suspects her of not being his child at all. add on top of this that she is mouthy in a way unbefitting of a female. add on top of this that beron doesn't care to hone her abilities beyond cursory training because they won't amount to anything anyway. add on top of this that males see her and covet her for the access she offers them to power, the same way females have been doing to eris since he first showed markers of being heir. young. so young. add on top of this that these males take cue from beron's disdain of her and feel more emboldened to treat her presumptuously. it's like the perfect storm.

i do think loa would be extreeemely protective of a daughter, even more so one between her and helion. beron might initially try to wound loa by keeping this daughter away from her and with wetnurses/governesses, but ultimately he is too distrustful and doesn't care to raise a female himself so it goes back to loa. that's the duty of a wife. so he would let loa have her little doll to keep her busy. loa in turn would be even more protective of her daughter because of their closeness and the lack of interference from beron, who will ultimately only care about her when it comes time to leverage her in an advantageous political marriage.

that poses real big issues for known control freak eris vanserra, who would take it upon himself to keep his sister prepared and safe, just as he has always done for his brothers. picturing it sort of like the thought exercise where he has a daughter—him knowing how males treat females and therefore deciding to minimize her femininity as much as possible so that she has better standing in this male-dominated sociopolitical hellscape. but all the while loa is lashing at him even more viciously than she did in canon when it came to lucien. because what does eris know of being female? what does eris know of navigating life as a female? what does eris know of the ways females learn to protect themselves—which they do and have and will continue to do without his "help?" why is he nosing about her daughter anyway? what purpose could he possibly have for this?

this literally made me go 🤩 because i was torn so many ways over it. i interpret eris as a character whose ruthlessness and ambition is rooted in his drive to protect his own, as well as the bitter spite over the fact that the people he suffers to protect hate him—have to hate him for him to protect them. if he isn’t in beron’s favor, he doesn’t have the standing to keep them safe. if he isn’t in power once beron is gone, the unrest amongst the political factions could see them all killed. not to borgias my vanserras yet again, but i think their lives are very much dependent on beron, then eris staying in power.

SO i feel like ……. eris loves autumn. he does. he loves the magic of his land so much, and it loves him so much. he wants to do right by it. he wants to heal it of the rot beron has let fester and overtake. he wants to bring his people towards bounty and harvest. but not at the expense of his family. his being heir is a shackle as much as it is a boon—more. this situation would cause such intense cognitive dissonance because—

—wouldn’t it be so nice? to be free? to let someone else carry the weight? to be assured that they would do so with ease? to know his court and his people were in good hands? a childhood dream, caught on the edges of sleep, because he could never let himself think it outright. but it is never to be. he is bird and cage. he has to be in power, he has to have control, no matter that someone else would be better equipped. he’ll simply try harder, work faster, be stronger; he’ll simply become what he must to have it all. he’ll make sure everything falls into place the way it needs to. (and wouldn’t it be so tragic if that was what made him the worse choice for a ruler in the end?)

i wish i could properly express the synaptic event which occurred after receiving this ask my god!!!!! there are a few fixed factors at play to make this bond just absolutely diabolical for both of them: beron having had sex with (and having uhhh enslaved) iphigenia, beron having abused eris (while simultaneously molding eris into his image), iphigenia looking a lot like loa, eris looking enough like beron. because of these there are many many avenues to pursue with this bond but i think there are two overarching onsets to them: eris is young and so he leaves iphigenia to beron for a while before liberating her because he 1) doesn’t have the means to intervene 2) thinks it’s better/safer to have her close by than somewhere he can’t monitor her 3) knows he’s his mate and his match and so must be as resilient and hearty as he is; or eris is older/post-utm timeline and intervenes as soon as he is realistically able, but even that isn’t enough to spare iphigenia of beron completely.

so truly i think he sees them to their death. he would feel wholly responsible for them. he loved them and so he was meant to find a way to keep them alive and he failed in doing so. he is not a male who can let things go, even if it's out of his control. he failed. to fight the nature of the world. as if such a thing is meant to be fought. very vampire whose mortal lover refuses to be turned. bonus points if their memory begins to fail in their old age and they keep asking and asking and asking if he's found a way yet, they want to live, they want to be with him, they love him so much, he'll find a way, won't he? he always finds a way. eris nods. yes, he says. he'll find a way. they die while he's still seeking a way.

bonus bonus points if his search is what domino effect leads the king of hybern to realize the potential of the cauldron :•)

> : ) oh man i mean i think he bluescreens for a second right??? eris who is always prone to lashing with his tongue to maintain control in emotionally heightened situations, who has done so for decades and centuries and still does during political maneuverings, who is unaccustomed to softness and tenderness with those he loves—he barbs her during this argument and gets the exact outcome he knew he would. leverage is returned to him; she has fallen silent.

just like that, he is beron, and he has made her his mother.

except his mother always schooled her hurt. his mate feels comfortable with him, so she doesn’t. worse, he probably feels it like a wound to their bond. violent eris, cruel eris, painful eris. he hears his father’s satisfaction with him at his ear, and he feels ill but doesn’t know what to do about it. doesn’t have the language for remorse or apology. words are insufficient besides—surely she knows this, that they are paltry things, that his actions speak for him, that he didn’t mean it, not like that? but the first tear falls, and it’s dark to his eye as spilled blood.

he reaches forth to brush it away on a knuckle and she doesn’t flinch and somehow that makes it all the worse. he doesn’t want her to fear him, but it wouldn’t surprise him if she did; doesn’t everyone? at the very least, she should be angry. she should want to hurt him back. none of those things happen. her jaw tightens. her chin wobbles. she doesn’t want to concede so easily, but she leans into the small comfort of his affection. maaaybe depending on the severity of what he said/what their argument was about, he offers, i misspoke.

much more likely if any of it was Serious, she has to be the one to take command and steer the conversation. if she isn’t willing to and walks away from it, she’d have to reinitiate. he might try to bring it back up again but only once emotions had settled, likely after they had sex or came together strongly on another matter, something to show him there’s still intimacy and connection and love between them, that she isn’t going anywhere and doesn’t think he’s his father. i could see him trying to navigate the situation without addressing it at all. showing her his apology in some way—depending on their argument, maybe doing what she had been advocating or at least showing her that he took her words to heart.