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Aqua Utopia｜海の底で記憶を紡ぐ
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@sysfreaks
collective name azure, blu(e), melo, michael
collective pronouns he shi it ae xe pup
body age 21 (19.08)
bodily taken 15.10.25
bpd ⟡ npd ⟡ dpd ⟡ cptsd ⟡ fibromyalgia ⟡ autism
ANTI ENDO !
layout | fandom blog | mogai blog | fluffle
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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robotgirl
a gender tied to being a robot and a girl. feeling like a machine who is also a girl. feels disconnected from humanhood but still identifies as a girl. this gender feels unreal, inhuman and emotionless. perhaps tied to one’s own dissociation.
“girl” can be interpreted however one’s desires.
self-indulgent. flag made by us.
polyfragmented more like polyfagmented. the majority of us are queer
DID isn't just having alters, it's:
Not knowing as the host, who you are most of the days 24/7
Not knowing which name to go by
Derealization/Depersonalization 24/7
Being a system is like one day you’re convinced that your abusers are actually good people and they never did anything bad to you and you’re just making it all up and the next day your brain will randomly decide to bless you with the memories of the fucking war crimes your abusers committed towards you while you’re waiting in a Tescos parking lot or some shit
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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they should make a brain thats not obsessive or compulsive 😂😂😂😂😂😂
well i guess that's fine
reminder that your abuse is real and valid. it is enough. you didn't deserve anything that happened to you. you deserve to be happy.
“don’t put your triggers out to everybody to see” agreed! also who the hell remembers their triggers.
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
i’m starting to believe we i have a mixture of ocd, bpd (diagnosed) and cptsd (semi? diagnosed - like, a doctor told us me but never actually diagnosed us me with it) instead of did. would make a lot of sense actually. yup, not because of denial or something! total sense!
we will talk with our therapist this saturday.
i am in a very denial phase of my life right now. not very cute not very funny. i am in hell and they’re devouring me.
we searched and found our old phone just so we could install ampersand since we mainly own an iphone. this is the level we're at. basically we will be using two phones now HELP
i hate having this disorder. i genuinely wish to be wrong about it and that i don’t actually have it. i feel so miserable because of my did and it hurts. i wish it could be joyful and sometimes it is but lately it’s just making my life worse. it’s gotten so bad where i wanted to tell one of our abusers of it so she knew. but it would’ve been even more traumatising. i feel lost.
Intersex culture is looking at a diagram of a vagina and being extremely confused bc yours looks nothing like that.
intersex culture is...
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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stop asking transmascs if they just have internalized misogyny and start asking cis women if they just have internalized transphobia
is pro para just about being pro recovery?
yeah, pretty much. i’m pro-para / pro-consent and especially anti-abuse. and of course pro-recovery / pro-healing. ^.^
also i support one’s attractions / paraphilias through fiction as it helps people cope / explore them without hurting people. even though, i believe there are ways and ways to do that. i also believe for certain paraphilias to keep them private as it could give predators ideas… it depends honestly by how it is portrayed tbh. <3
hopefully i answered your question and didn’t end yapping much. 😓
