actually simon's willingness to be vulnerable in shocking, when you think of his backstory and his situation. i don't think it can all be chalked up to the intensity of what he's going through at the time. for example:
it's one thing to not be able to completely hide your emotions, but to express a need about them, and even to be in touch with oneself to this extent at all (rather than constant callousness and lashing out or total withdrawal, which are pretty typical in male characters especially), says a lot about the strength of his nature. that is, for someone to have a painful life where they aren't well-supported, the ability to still feel and express as deeply and vulnerably as this isn't easy to hold on to.
so in shipping terms, it makes the most sense to believe he would be totally aware of how he feels and both willing and able to openly discuss it, and have a warm attitude toward human connection, without denial or hostility toward (for example) grace.
tbh if you wanted to say one of them would be "better" at this kind of communication, i would pick simon for his emotional honesty.
grace can teach middle schoolers, but struggles to communicate or set boundaries with adults. he gives up or lashes out but doesn't take the risk or make the effort to reveal anything deeper about his feelings, if he doesn't think they will be "acceptable" to others.
simon doesn't hide his feelings to protect himself or to be polite, so everything he shows is just because that's how he really feels. and again and again in the film we see that how he really feels is empathy, compassion, as well as a sense of his own value as a person worthy of survival and respect just like everyone else.
grace is going to have to learn how to get in touch with his own feelings and lower his defenses for them to have good communication in their relationship.
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