Fuck It, We Cook

IDK man it's like. c!Tubbo Eldest-Daughtercore, Perfect All-American Bitch, Brutal, Surface Pressure, A Pearl, Monster, Kill All Your Friends, Burned Out, Gone Away, Sorry, Guiltless. Yknow what I mean

ren: i'd happily munch on a bit of iskall thigh mumbo: you are in danger. the fanfictions are being drawn up as we speak

T.G.I.F !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Thank guns im friday. Last night.My husband went missing in the darkness but i found him flat on his back in a field. And all around him chunks of dirt were missing from the ground. Shephards pie for dinner

This king

Imagine being tricked into legally marrying your best friend and then be legally stuck in matrimony bc he won’t sign the divorce papers and instead writes an entire wattpad fanfic about how you won’t kiss with tongue

hey op what does this mean

Tommy filmed a vlog where he and tubbo got married. Very unserious but tubbo was not informed on the content on the vlog until he actually got to the filming location. Fast forward to a couple months ago, tubbo is on QSMP and making jokes about marrying Fit in Vegas when he realizes that he actually signed a marriage certificate and said vows in front of an ordained minister (Scott smajor) during the Vlog. No one actually knows if this is a joke or is true, but everybody kind of goes along with it. Tbh today happens, TommyInnit uploads a link to Wattpad on his main Twitter account, where he  wrote a fanfiction of him and Tubbo getting together. Turbo calls to confront him on stream, where it’s revealed that TommyInnit has been served divorce papers, but has not signed them and instead wrote the fic. Apparently, Tubbo had signed the marriage certificate because he thought that it was actually a release form before the Vlog and not an actual marriage certificate. Supposedly, he is currently working on getting legally divorced from Tommy, but Tommy refuses to sign the paperwork.

c!tubbo exiling c!tommy and saying "it's how it has to be. you're a liability. you need to leave now" and c!tommy just responding "but you're my friend" and both of them staring at each other for a few seconds before ctubbo says "goodbye tommy" i srsly do nottt think we talk about this enough like there should be a national holiday for it imagine carrying the weight you never asked for of a nation you could never abandon on your shoulders and having to choose that sort of responsibility over your best friend imagine having to look him in the eyes as you send him away and being met with the simple truth of "but youre my friend". do you ever wonder how many memories flashed through their heads in those few seconds of silence do you ever wonder how it must feel to drive a knife into the back of someone you love do you ever wonder how they were able to perfectly capture that moment when duty surpasses friendship but the friendship is still so painfully there even typing this out i know im not doing it justice its sooo... my friend michael and i are walking home arguing about that movie he says that he believes a person can love someone and still be able to murder that person!!! you were my town now im in exile seeing you out!!! oh my god

Bruhh can dream shut up about Tommy and also shut up forever actually

Dream stan link sorry about that (I'd download the video but I don't pay for twitter) but here's the 2 min clip

Sorry I was gonna add this in the tags but it got big enough for a comment. It bugs me that he's phrasing it like this is completely one sided; he words it like Tommy has just made some mistakes or done seem mean things, but that Dream doesn't want it to affect their relationship. He's saying it like there's still potential for them to be friends again when Tommy has openly disliked him for months now, and it's very reminiscent of how he handled Quackity ghosting him. As long as Dream publicly states that he wants to play nice, it doesn't matter what bullshit he's pulled with them in private or public beforehand, because people will believe that he's just so earnest and forgiving of these evil people who betrayed him like this ☹️ why couldn't they just be nice to Dream, who would never hurt them and only ever tries to love people?

What if I just chose violence tonight.