yes

My medieval servant boy has gone missing. I’ll just use Google to see if I can find him.

im deleting this fucking website

It took me a minute

Gotdamn I haven’t seen this post in almost a decade

thank you for come to brazil

being friends with english majors is so fun you'll send a text like hey are you free for brunch and they'll respond with some shit like "haven't the faintest clue, my schedule is utterly fucked"

maybe tumblr will give us the notes back if we put on the greatest talent show this website's ever seen

there is no theme in my posting tonight. you’re reading too much into it

admit it u all have a crush on me

okay who is ready to be in love with me

Dogs are machines that turn normal toys into wet yucky toys

Who wants to come over and have a crush on me

Who wants to come over and have a crush on me

Do you have a crush on me? Have you had a crush on me? Will you have a crush on me? When will you have a crush on me?

hey i went to corndog city & i didn't ask them about you & i stayed there & i live there now

Julius Ceasar has been dead for 2064 slutty, slutty years

Julius Caesar has been dead for 2065 slutty, slutty years

Julius Caesar has been dead for 2066 slutty, slutty years

Julius Caesar has been dead for 2067 slutty, slutty years

Julius Caesar has been dead for 2068 slutty, slutty years

Julius Caesar has been dead for 2069 (nice) slutty, slutty years