tbh i was kinda disappointed the first time i sucked a dick. idk what i expected it to taste like but i was just like “oh okay”

Cock is one of my favorite tastes. Not only that, but balls smell amazing. It makes me go a little crazy on it to be honest. Like, I cannot get it far enough down my throat to be satisfied. I’m only satisfied when I feel those intense, powerful, salty, hot pumps of cum down my throat. When I sit back on my heels, look up at you with cum all over my mouth and slobber running down my neck, hair all fucked up and wipe my mouth with the back of my arm and ask you if I did a good job and you cannot even speak because I’ve drained all of your energy out the tip of your dick….. That’s when I’m satisfied.

does that person know they LITERALLY invented comedy??? do they really know????

this is a MOMA exhibit

what if you adopted a huge mutt from the pound and later you found out it was a werewolf who was staying in canid form for tax evasion purposes. and what’s more fucked up is that you already love your dog and you’ve had them for a while when you find out he’s been just some guy. what then

"what then" baby this is a monsterfucker website

You had an unproductive day? WRONG. You spent the day being sexy as fuck, aesthetically impressive. A fortress of fine. Was it what you wanted to do? Probably not. But it's SOMETHING, so you still got something done, and that's something to be proud of. Idc if you think you looked bad all day, I'm here to tell you you're wrong, and you're smokin' hot and I would absolutely kiss you on the mouth, with tongue, and gusto.

it’s him..,…the piano Man

Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetuer adipiscing elit. Aliquam nisi lorem, pulvinar id, commodo feugiat, vehicula et, mauris. Aliquam mattis porta urna. Maecenas dui neque, rhoncus sed, vehicula vitae, auctor at, nisi. Aenean id massa ut lacus molestie porta. Curabitur sit amet quam id libero suscipit venenatis.

this is the oldest post on all of tumblr, posted in october 2006 before the website even launched publicly in 2007.

there is no force of nature that says “come here” like the ocean

That’s the sirens bitch

Oh you think I’m cute? Why don’t you breed me about it

why would you follow me from an empty blog babygirl you look like a serial killer

sorry your dick hurts queen 😔 want me to kiss it better?

happy pride month to country mama lynn and country mama lynn only

Someone give this woman a damn crown and medal

I keep fantasizing about being quarantined with someone who is hella dominant and like just being used as their fucktoy whenever they want