And then men who are part of big toxic masculine cult movements - like alpha males and incels - take advantage of this isolation. They tell these young boys and men "we'll accept you. We'll help you find somewhere you belong. Women don't want you, but we can change that/you don't need them."

Because this IS a cult. It really is. It is a cult that targets boys and men. These people are so desperate to be desired and loved and wanted - because they grow up in a society where boys/men are demonized for showing affection, where they are bullied for showing any emotion, where they are told to "man up" - that they listen, they obey, because maybe it will mean they can be desirable. It starts off small, but it gets more and more extreme as it goes, just as all cults do.

It gets to a point where these boys and men spend hours on end on incel forums or alpha male podcasts, often of which will lead them into buying online courses or going to actual camps (yes, that's a real thing, look it up) where they are told to be on a strict diet, don't be fat, workout all day long, never sleep "more than you need to", never eat "more than you need to", etc, etc, etc - basically, telling them to torture themselves.

They promote eating disorders, body dysmorphia, exercise addiction, work addiction, sleeping disorders, and so much more.

More often than not, the boys and men falling into this are fat or disabled, and are made to feel uniquely unlovable by society, hence why they develop such a strong sense of desperation.

And then radical feminists have the audacity to point at these men and say "wow look at them, so evil, so horrible, I can't believe they believe these things" as if they didn't push them away. As if they aren't also a part of a gender-based cult.

While at the same time supporting women who fall into similar beauty standard cults, saying "it's not their fault, of course they torture themselves into being beautiful, it's what the patriarchy does!" - forgiving any toxic femininity that comes from them, while not holding that same grace towards men who struggle with toxic masculinity, who are also being tortured by the patriarchy into specific beauty standards.

And before any of the "piss on the poor" commenters come here - no, I am not excusing toxic masculinity and misogyny. No, I'm not saying men who use these cults to be predators should be let off the hook.

But I think it's important to remember that not everyone who has fallen victim to these movements are unsalvageable. They're just people. Their behaviors are wrong, but they are still capable of change.

Many of these boys and men just need to be given a chance, a better community to belong to. And sometimes that takes a bit of pushing, because they are trapped in a cult, but really, most of them are not lost causes.