Self Discovery

Do you like the rainbow? Do you like the idea of playing with berry Sims but hate berry Sims? Do you want to mess around with aspects of the game you’ve never used before? Boy, do I have the challenge for you!

Welcome to the Not So Berry Legacy Challenge, a ten generation legacy with a focus on bright colors and new experiences.

Basic Rules:

Each heir must represent the color of the generation (i.e. hair, makeup, clothing), but brightly colored skin is not necessary (these aren’t actually berry Sims, that’s the joke). Of course, this is optional but a big portion of the fun.

The colors of the spouses don’t matter as they aren’t part of the challenge. Unless otherwise stated you can do whatever you please with them.

Money cheats can be used, but not excessively. Suggestion: use freerealestate for your first home, but no cheats afterward.

You may live wherever you please unless something is specified in the rules of a generation.

Every generation is supposed to complete both the career and aspiration of the heir unless explicitly stated otherwise.

Keep the lifespan on normal.

If you play this challenge and want to share it with us, go ahead and post with #notsoberry so we can see!

My good friend @alwaysimming​ and I kind of created this challenge on accident, but I think it turned out pretty great. We wanted to make something that forced us to play with parts of the game we’ve never explored before. Hopefully you’ll have fun too. You can follow our gameplay on @mintiphresh​ and @lea-fey​ (pronounced “minty fresh” and “leafy”)!

We don't have to put on a show all the time (or ever, quite frankly) and most often alters are just regular people who can lead quite normal lives. Like we're not all hashtag quirky LMAO no hate to those who are "quirky" or whatnot, but some of us are just... normal people.

I hate that people are going to see me as lesser or other just because I'm an alter in a system. I didn't choose this, and it's not my fault that I don't have my own separate body to navigate the world in. I'm not upset with the way my life is (usually), but I also definitely didn't choose it.

hi everyone. this is mainly directed at the DID community. it is not in any way meant to be an attack, but instead is meant to raise awareness.

when i was young, from about 14 to 17, i believed i had dissociative identity disorder. i had flashbacks, lost time (amnesia), different identity states in my head that i talked to, and memories of childhood trauma. i was treated by several doctors who also believed i had DID, because of how i presented.

it was later found out, after rigorous therapy, that i did not have DID at all, but instead severe psychosis. i had never undergone the severe childhood trauma that i believed whole-heartedly for years that i had experienced.

i was not faking, but i did not have DID and still do not. 

what’s really important when it comes to self-diagnosing with really severe disorders such as DID, is accepting the possibility that you could be wrong. 

you could be wrong about your self-diagnosis. there is a reason that even professionals cannot diagnose themselves- you cannot be objective about your own condition. confirmation bias means that you automatically accept that which supports your narrative, and dismiss evidence that does not support your narrative. 

now, i have no doubt that there are people out there with DID, and i fully support and will defend those people, because they were there for me when i genuinely thought that i was a survivor of sadistic abuse. 

there will no doubt people who fake DID intentionally, whether for attention, monetary gain, simply because they think it makes them more interesting, it’s ‘trendy’, etc. there will also be people that don’t have DID, but believe they do, whether that be because they have issues with discerning what is real or not, they’re mistaking symptoms, or their confirmation bias means they cannot see the situation objectively.

to reframe it, let’s talk about someone who believes that they have a brain injury. they show all the symptoms of a brain injury, because they genuinely believe that they have one, and subconsciously mimic the symptoms.  however, when given a scan, they show no signs of a brain injury. they’re so certain that they must have it, because they have all the symptoms, that they didn’t stop to consider that something else may be causing these symptoms. 

this is what it can be like for someone unintentionally ‘mimicking’ having DID.

i hope this post is read how it was intended- to not be an attack on anyone, nor fakeclaim anyone. it’s merely here to remind you to question, every now and then, and also to seek professional help if you have access to it.  don’t let your confirmation bias mean you only accept information that fits your narrative. 

I don't think people without DID/OSDD understand the exact magnitude of what it means to not know who you are, especially as a host of a system. Like yeah when you're dissociated and blendy it can be hard to understand who you are or what's going on, but every single goddamn day I, Jules, host of the system, have an anxiety attack because I have no idea who I really am. I can be fully in front with nobody co-con and I don't know who I am.

I don't really know what I like and dislike. I don't know my style preferences. Every time I think about wearing clothes or eating food, someone else is co-con and influences me to get what they want. I generally don't even realize it until I'm looking down at what I'm wearing and I'm like "oh wow, Foster would love this outfit." Surprise, bitch! Foster picked it out!

I like reading and writing. So does James. In fact I literally cannot write anything unless James is co-con with me. Sure we have different style choices, I tend to be a little more aggressive, but I feel like my ability to actually write is hella influenced by him.

I enjoy punk rock. But I also enjoy indie. And hyperpunk. And 2000s pop. Guess who else enjoys these things? Alice, James, Brett, and Foster. The main fronters. When I don't know what I want to listen to someone will always decide for me.

I recently wondered what my favorite color was. I don't really have one. My favorites are green, red, black, and cyan. Oh...but guess who does have favorite colors? James, Foster, Alice, and Brett. The main fronters.

I feel like the entirety of who I am is dependent on them. Without them, who am I? I truly feel like I am a husk of a personality. Like they made me up as their "singlet-sona" (I hate that word, I just can't think of anything else) and I just exist as someone they masquerade as in front of others. I myself am nobody. I don't know who I am. I have no memory of my childhood, my teen years are spotty at best, and I spend entire days of my adulthood as someone else and nobody knows it.

My mother was certain I loved chocolate cake. Foster does, I don't really care for it. My fiance makes me mac n cheese because it's my favorite, but it's also Brett's favorite, so is it really? Some days I love hot coffee but some days I prefer iced. Depends on if James or Brett are co-con I guess.

When it's just me in front I feel like I never know what I want. I have all these hobbies and talents that I thought I had but I don't. I like soda, but I don't know which one is my favorite because it changes so often. Sometimes I get so overwhelmed by not knowing who I am that I desperately try to get someone to co-con with me so I have an inkling of what it's like to actually *like* things and have hobbies and goals.

I fully, 100%, don't know who I am. I don't know my sexuality, I don't know my gender identity, I don't know any of my likes and dislikes. I have been the host for as long as I can remember but that's not very reliable, considering I barely remember anything. It is so painful. I feel so empty, so devoid. I don't know anything about ME and I am scared. And sad. I just want to be myself but who is the real me?

If anyone else has anything to add, feel free. I feel so alone in this. Systems only, please, I feel like singlets don't quite understand this predicament.

(ok to rb)

There are some things that our singlet friends do that just really annoy us and make certain alters too afraid to front. It’s not their fault because they don’t know any better but hey, after reading this post, you will.

-You don’t have to treat alters like fragile sensitive things that you have to be polite and perfect around. We’re literally just people. Treat us like you would any other person (unless told otherwise)

-The conversation you were having with someone before a switch doesn’t have to stop because a new alter is fronting. If an alter tries to continue the conversation you were having with the previous alter, just continue on.

-Sometimes alters will just pop in to say something and then leave. We regularly have it where certain alters will hop in just to say or do one thing and then immediately leave. Please don’t expect alters to always stick around for long

-Switches can happen without the current person fronting noticing so if the person you’re talking to just suddenly changes mannerisms or forgets what you said previously in the conversation, just roll with it and bear with them

-Some alters are also to scared to introduce themselves or simply just don’t want to bring attention to themselves so please don’t point out if a switch has happened and has gone unannounced (also note that you, most of the time, will not be able to detect switches so please don’t think you can)

-If the system you’re talking to seems to be dissociating (or outright tells you they are), ask what you can do to help. Sometimes dissociation will be caused by a switch, in which case (for a lot of systems), it’s better to just let things run their course and let the system handle it themselves. Other times they might need some help (be taken out of a situation, do some grounding exercises, etc.). If you’re unsure how to help ground someone, one of our favourites (and a pretty easy method) is to just ask about a certain subject. Maybe “What’s your favourite flower? Have you ever seen this flower in person or only in pictures? Have you ever gotten to smell this flower? What’s your favourite thing about it?” or something similar. It helps to get the person out of their own head and back into reality. But, of course, ask a system (when they’re not dissociating) what the best way to help them in that situation is

-When a new alter fronts, just read the freaking room. There’s not any one way to “deal with” an alter or a switch, so just read the situation and decide how to act from there on out. Maybe an alter needs to be told where they are or what’s going on. Maybe a system will need a few minutes after a switch to fully ground themselves. Maybe the person will just want to keep doing what you were doing. Just read the situation and, if you’re ever unsure, just ask

-Ask if they know who you are (if they’re an alter you’ve never met before). Even if they don’t want the switch to be a big deal (which most don’t), it’s always appreciated to be told who you’re talking to

-It’s ok to dislike an alter and it’s ok for an alter to dislike you. That’s just how people are. Some peoples personalities just aren’t compatible. Obviously don’t talk shit about them or anything because that’s just rude for anybody but it’s ok to just Not Vibe with someone.

Overall, just ask. System experiences are different for every system, whether it’s in big ways or small ways. What works for one system might not work for another and that’s ok. You don’t treat every person the same, so don’t treat every system the same. If you’re ever confused about something, please never be afraid to ask (unless it’s about trauma in which case it’s none of your business). There’s probably more I could’ve said though, so feel free to add stuff :))

there is a deep longing in me for the safety of an innocent childhood, or the carefree turmoil of a rebellious adolescence that can never be realised . theres a deep sense that im a little girl or an unruly teenager . theres a reluctance , or inability, to accept that im an adult, that life didnt stop then , that the world didnt wait for me, time kept going and it left me behind.

her wisdom is out of this world…

🌺 🤲depersonalize 🪐💥

🌈👁derealize 🌥🎶