that's my purse i don't know you

love when cats hear that you've woken up even just a little bit and they're like hiiiiiii oh my god oh my god!!!!! i wrote some poems in the night let me recite them for you. this one is called: screaming and knocking your water bottle off your nightstand

sometimes you dont eat fruit for awhile and then you eat some fruit and you're like oh fuck its fruit

imagine dying while brass monkey by the beastie boys plays

hate when streaming services are like.... you can now pay cinema prices to watch new releases at home! not to show my age but if i am watching it on my tv set then it's free??? you think you're an equal to big picturehouse? with no big screen? no big pop corn? you want to charge cinema price to show me a movey in my own house? Honour demands i kill you btw

deeply and passionately kissing a maiden named iced water

very well, i shall smoke this “bowl” with you. but take warning! henceforth i may become quite….. silly…

one thing i think is good about getting older is that the longer you're alive, the more you figure out the way you want to live. not even talking about big ideas for what to do with your life, but small things like knowing what kind of bread you like to make sandwiches with, what time works best for you to wake up and go to bed, what kind of clothes you feel comfortable wearing, and just generally what you want to spend your time on and what can be eliminated without being missed

they should invent someone who wants to kiss me so so bad

The girlies going to brunch