SUGAR SYSTEM!

FedEx: shits on my box, stomps on my box, kicks it, dumps gasoline on it, throws one of my chickens into the back of the van UPS: whispers at my front door “is anyone home” as quietly as possible before leaving a “we missed you!” note, tries to gaslight me into thinking my address doesn’t exist USPS: sets my package down gently where it’s not visible from the road, knocks on the door and kisses me directly on the mouth

shipcourse

There are, at every turn, adults trying to help Kevin. He is not trapped in that house, he goes shopping like three times. He convinces the pizza delivery guy that there’s an old guy there trying to murder him. Kevin knows exactly what the fuck he’s doing and what he is doing is psychological warfare

Petition to make Home Alone a PG-13 movie at LEAST so the Wet Bandits can call Kevin a little shit on-screen

Actually no. Rated R. I want to watch Kevin kill a man

It started out as a random burglary but the SECOND Kevin shot that dude in the dick it became personal

I just realized that like. Until the end of the movie Kevin never figured out his family straight up forgot him at home. He truly thought he had fucking magicked them away with his wish that night and that he had magic powers. No wonder the kid was so full of hubris with those robbers he had the power of God and Santa on his side

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👁🥞💔🤌😭

would YOU date a werewolf

ya

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Ya

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autism. reblog

I’m being possessed right now. Sorry

i thought delaware was a place in ohio? why are there so many things named delaware?

what the fuck

Wait what? I thought Delaware was a store with building supplies. Like paint, wood, nails and stuff?

THATS HOME DEPOT ???

I know home depot, but dude I don't know anything about America mad have never been there. Are you sure there is not a some sort of store called something close to Delaware!?!

.....ace hardware....?

this post has only been around for a few hours but could very well be a world heritage post

This post launched at 8am PST on 12 Feb 2021. The above conversation has happened in 3 hours.

he WHAT? i thought he was from. w. wait. ???

delaware stole the presidents shoelaces for clout and became too powerful

From the UK- and what do you mean Delaware isn't a type of ceramic?

@hellsite-hall-of-fame is it too early?

Isn’t delaware what they make computers on???

software ??

oh i thought delaware was that one british singer lady, you know, the one from chasing pavements

that's fucking adele

isn’t delaware that place you go when you die

youre thinking of superhell and all of you are going there

how the fuck did any of you come to the conclusions you all made

we live in america?

I thought Delaware was that food delivery service that keeps interrupting youtube videos with their ads when I'm trying to have a good time

..... are you talking about Doordash???

Isn't Delawere the name of that one girl in the song that goes "Hey there, Delawere"? She's from NYC or something.

THATS HEY THERE DELILAH

Pausing here to point out that op is “dear-AO3″ and now I’m wondering if Delaware fanfic would be categorized as RSF (real state fic) or AU (alternate unitedstates)

stop i do not want to think about this 

Isn’t Delaware that SPN ship that exploded the internet

I love that the “no, that’s [x]” meme is making a comeback here and only here and nobody has any idea what’s going on

Keep up the good work, we can make poor OP have a melt down yet. 

Isn't delaware that one brand of pizza that's like "it's not delivery, it's delaware."

isn't delaware the god of the sea

Isn't Delaware the name of that guy who painted the Mona Lisa?

delaware is that one evil cyborg guy that has a son named Luke and a red laser sword

Thats Darth Vader. Im pretty sure Delaware is that other red-laser sword guy. You know. The one that stabbed Qui-Gon.

I usually only reblog older posts, but this definitely deserves to be in every tumblr hall of fame