Purple

One thing I keep thinking about is how afraid Mahiro is of getting specifically “found out”. There’s zero way this could happen, but she still is terrified of being outed as being “really a guy” and experiencing transmisogyny specifically in the form of immediate accusations of being a disgusting pervert, etc.

I would actually go as far as to say that MOST abuse is unintentional. I think most people will go through their lives without ever experiencing intentional abuse. People are abusive because they're selfish, because they're stressed, because they care more about what society thinks they should do than the impacts of their actions on their children and partners, because they think what they're doing is correct, because they've made it make sense in their own heads, because they think they can fix their victims, they think they can fix their relationships, they think they can stop you from leaving, they think they can make you a better partner to them, they think that means you need to do what they want. We've sort of constructed mental illness in a way that doing this shit to other people counts as a form of mental illness because it is anti social behavior in the literal sense— it is behavior that causes social harm.

I would actually go as far as to say that MOST abuse is unintentional. I think most people will go through their lives without ever experiencing intentional abuse. People are abusive because they're selfish, because they're stressed, because they care more about what society thinks they should do than the impacts of their actions on their children and partners, because they think what they're doing is correct, because they've made it make sense in their own heads, because they think they can fix their victims, they think they can fix their relationships, they think they can stop you from leaving, they think they can make you a better partner to them, they think that means you need to do what they want. We've sort of constructed mental illness in a way that doing this shit to other people counts as a form of mental illness because it is anti social behavior in the literal sense— it is behavior that causes social harm.

My roommate is transmasc. We were just talking about their reluctance to use the men's bathroom even as they "pass" more and more as a man, which is starting to cause people to give them concerning looks when they use the women's. They said they still use the women's because they feel more comfortable there. Which is fine, we shouldn't have gendered bathrooms anyway. But I told them "you might not feel as safe when you eventually get 'accused' of being a trans woman in the women's bathroom." To which they replied "oh, I'll lust lift my shirt and show them my mastectomy scars. That'll prove I belong in there."

Their pronouns are they/them. They will accept he/him, but prefer they/them.

Ah, that would be what gave you the confidence....

More info:

A brief timeline of JK Rowling’s descent into TERFdom