u know what’s weird.. that i’m going to like.. keep getting older.. and like i’m going to change.. experience personal growth and character development and shit.. like that’s wild

americans don’t deserve a solar eclipse. someone move the moon

In astrology solar eclipses are strongly associated with the downfall of leaders. This eclipse will deliver us.

*wakes up in my own bed on a regular day* what? is this hell? am I in hell?

Fuck me as hard as my anxiety does

im scared that tomorrow imma fuck around and look at the sun on accident

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the other night i tried to make a curry and i got chilli burns all over my face, so i thought to myself ‘hang on, doesn’t milk soothe chilli burns? it does’ and i couldn’t google because i couldn’t see so i just had to blindly feel my way to the fridge and pour out a bowl of milk, and then plant my face in the bowl of milk, anyway at that point the rice cooker went off and triggered a power surge which turned my electricity off, which i didn’t notice at first because i had my face in a bowl of milk and when i did emerge from the dairy prison i thought i had gone blind with chilli burns. so no i don’t really cook much.