Incorrect Stranger Things Quotes

(Introducing Max to D&D) Mike: Alright. I’ll tell you guys which path to take if Max gives me a high five. Max: Nope. I don’t do high fives. Mike: Slap it boss. Max: Not gonna happen. Mike: Party on the top floor. Max: Nope. Mike: Little slappy, make daddy happy. Max: That’s weird.  Mike: Come on, just one little high five. Max: Oh no thanks, I’m good. Mike: Here, just do this (*mimics high five*), but with your hand. Max: Thank you for that demonstration. Really cleared up exactly what I will not be doing. Dustin: Max! It’s a high five! The other paths lead to certain death. GET PERSPECTIVE!

Dustin: What do you suggest? Steve: I’m thinking. Robin: Don’t strain yourself.

Will: Hey guys! I bet you can’t make a sentence without the letter A. Dustin: You thought you just did something there, didn’t you? Well sorry to burst your bubble, but numerous sentences could be constructed without using the first letter of the English lexicon. Lucas: Fuck you. Mike: Two types of people.

Steve: It’s all happening and I need an adult and I need an adult and I need an adu-- Dustin: Steve you are the adult. Steve: ... Steve: Nooooooooo.

Will: I really like Eminem. Mike: I prefer Skittles. Will: No like the rapper. Mike: Why would you eat the wrapper?

Dustin: So there I was, having a normal Sunday afternoon, just breaking and entering, ya know, as you do on a Sunday. Robin: Yeah. Steve: No?? I don’t??

Eddie: If you put “violently” in front of anything to describe your action, it becomes funnier.  Eddie: Violently plays guitar.  Steve: Violently drives. Nancy: Violently writes.  Jonathan: Violently takes pictures. Robin: Violently marches. Argyle: Violently eats pizza.  Billy: Violently murders people.  Steve: …violently worries about the previous statement.

Steve, in the hospital: This is fine. I mean, how often do people die in hospitals? Dustin: Just once, usually.

Vickie: *talking about a glass* I’m leaking. Robin: Hey. I’m the only one that makes you leak. Will: *sputters* Vickie: Ooh. That was a good one. Robin: I know. But seriously, we need to buy more napkins. Vickie: Hey come on now. I don’t leak THAT much. Will: *dies*

Steve: Next time maybe give me a little heads up with your plan. Dustin: I didn’t want you thinking. You’re not very good at that.

Henry: This weapon holds unspeakable powers.  El: Like what? Henry: I told you, they’re unspeakable!

Steve: Okay Robin. Now, you’ve seen a lot of confusing things tonight, and more confusing things are gonna happen because of the confusing things that happened tonight. Do you understand?  Robin: Not really. Steve: Good. That’s good. Dustin: I don’t understand either. Steve, to Dustin: Oh just tell her!

Russian: I could kill you if I wanted. Robin: Yeah? So could any other human being. So could a dog. So could a dedicated duck. You’re not special.

Robin: I guess you could bring your babysitting client with you. Steve: That would be weird for a lot of reasons. Mostly because her parents would probably be wondering what happened to her. Robin: And then you would call them and say “give me more money I’ve been watching your child for hours.” Erica: I’m pretty sure that’s just ransom. Steve: No no, I was babysitting. Dustin: Not kidnapping. Spontaneous babysitting.

Nancy: *takes out gun*  Jonathan: I thought you believed in gun control. Nancy: Yeah. I believe I should control the gun.

Steve: Huh. Dustin: Shut it. Steve: I just said “huh”. Dustin: And I just said “shut it”.