where my texas boys at..

texas 

This new Shaggy meme is kinda scaring me because Shaggy was my first crush and my whole family remembers me having long drawn out conversations with him like he was in the room, but it was just 6 year old me speaking into the void to Shaggy. Now I’m worried that the void may have talked back after all these years in the form of this meme and I have no way to stop it.

Why is this so funny

no time for mansplaining, this place is gonna blow

actually, it’s going to collapse. the bombs are only there to break the supports and compromise the structural integrity of the building so much that it collapses on itself. you would need a much more powerful bomb to literally blow up the building from the inside out since most of the energy would just be absorbed by th

They’ll have instructions to read the room and choose which they deem best fit

whenever a young kid joins our staff at work im just like huh. guess im a father now.

these kids will be like “can you drive me home? i don’t have gas money but-” and im already pullin out my keys and am like. sweetheart, you are a child. i am not charging a child gas money.

i literally almost lunged across the counter to throw hands with some old hag who yelled at and insulted one of our 16 y/o girls but instead i threw her sandwich at her and told her to never fucking come back

old dudes will flirt with our young girls too and i’ll be like ay man this is a truck stop, normal customer service rules dont apply here. i can and will call the cops on you.

im the only manager that actively tells them to steal food because these are teenagers and they are HUNGRY

You are the only valid manager

this is kind of hilarious to me because this made it seem like OP was at least mid to late 20s but they’re 19

Being the change he wants to see in this world

I cant believe this is actually john mulaney and not a parody blog created for the sole purpose of making this shitpost