Hippopotomonstrosesquipedaliophobe-friendly blog

Gotta love how Stolitz is like... childhood friends to strangers to transactional fuckbuddies of the kinky kind to exes to *almost fucking die for each other* to roommates to "omg omg are we about to kiss rn 😳"

"Pretty sure we're soulmates or something but we took the wrong directions on that trip, and now we're hitting all the major landmarks in the wrong order, and also I'm pretty sure we just drove off a cliff, but we're also pulling each other out of this wreckage and crawling to our destination if we have to."

the lion guard was so fucking funny. disney jr show that confirmed “can you feel the love tonight” was a sex scene in episode one. simba spent so long angsting over his dead dad and kion can just call him up for a pep talk whenever the fuck he wants. timon and pumbaa adopted a whole-ass second child in case you were wondering if they were still gay. lion king 2 is still canon it just happened during like the week kion was out. the episodes are written for 5yos and then like a season in the villains necromance scar to traumatize the main kid and permanently blind a main character. zira was a lion supremecist

queerplatonic is whatever those 3 middleaged animal men from ice age had btw. i hope you understand now

steven is a really funny character actually. he never went to school. one of his powers is astral projection for no real reason. hes a musical prodigy. he was so traumatized by the end of the show they had to make an entire epilogue series about it. he spent seven years looking like a 3rd grader. he was even bisexual

he went to the center of the earth. he saved the world in flip flops. he broke his bones every day and didnt even notice. he killed someone

he didn’t have a bellybutton. he actively chose to eat super crispy bits of potato that got left in the deep fryer. he lived in a house but his dad lived in a car within walking distance of his house. he could revive people from the dead. all of his clothes were concert merchandise. he had an outdoor washing machine. he was put on trial for murder. he broke both federal and state child labor laws

The murder he was on trial for was different than the murder he committed

The murder he went on trial for was a murder his mom committed. The victim of the murder was also his mom.

he plead guilty

Spotify wrapped is so funny. Like here is the soundtrack to all your emotional breakdowns from last year in a funky font, now would like to share it on social media?