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shout out to all factives forever !!

It depends on how you wanna look at it. I don't actively think about my source too much, but he informs a decent amount of my personality as well as how I choose to present myself and what triggers me to front. Seeing things about him or even just his time period more generally tends to bring me to front. Having him as a source makes me a lot more happy to see historical things, especially what he would have interacted with. Despite how bigoted (that's an understatement) of a person he was, my source was really kind to those that he saw as human. I feel like a lot of that carried over (of course minus the bigotry). I feel like it has especially made me one of the more patient members of the system. Having him as my source affected me a lot more when I first formed than it does now. I adjusted to the morals of the 21st century probably within the day, just because our system doesn't have really any variation when it comes to morals. But all the technology and history that had happened in the ~160 years since my source's death really confused me at first. It helped that I had J constantly in front to help me adjust to everything. Even if I intellectually caught up decently quick to the changes emotionally I still lagged behind a lot. I felt really alienated & uncomfortable with 21st century life at first. I specifically remember going into a department store for the first time & feeling horribly disoriented and almost a little derealize-y. But I'm used to it by now. To be honest, I don't know why I don't feel too guilty about my source like a lot of other problematic factives do, especially since my source is way worse than those of a lot of the problematic factives I've seen talk about feeling guilt. Maybe it's the time separation? Like it's easier to compartmentalize him from me when it's been over a century & half since he's done anything, yet alone something bad? Maybe it's that our system's initial interest in him that eventually led to my formation was primarily intellectual (as an interesting person and interesting manifestation of his time period) rather than emotional like the ways people tend to think about the work of the artists/YouTubers/actors/etc. they introject? Don't think I'll ever know, really. But as a result I tend to view myself as him minus the things that made him problematic. [Source Name] 2.0, if you would. The new & improved. I'm him, but through the filter of 21st century morality (or, more specifically, the morality of our system specifically). While I don't feel any moral hangups about having him as my source, I do work under the assumption that other people will. Even with a system friend of mine who I know has factives with sources from the same time period with me, I haven't revealed my source. I've barely acknowledged myself to them, even when I know they at least are accepting of factives of (historical) murderers. They'd probably be fine with me? But they're our only plural friend and I don't wanna risk losing them. I expect strangers to meet me much more harshly. Again, I've seen factives of people less harmful than my source be treated harshly. I've seen fictives of characters, whose sources haven't even affected the real world, and in canon have not caused as much harm as my source did be treated harshly. Why the HELL would I feel comfortable or even SAFE revealing who my source is? I don't want to subject myself or our system to backlash from people who assume that my existence is some sort of endorsement of my source's actions and beliefs, or that liking someone is a prerequisite to introjecting them. And even if I didn't fear that backlash, I feel a moral obligation to hide my source so I don't make others uncomfortable or unsafe. Because even though I don't think you should assume people endorse their sources, I think it's perfectly natural to wonder if they do. Or, in my case, to fear if they do.

like i know this is a me problem. but also. some of y'all need to get over yourselves a little bit.

and of course all these individual people are contained within a single computer program on a single computer....... curious

What the scientist can do is upload the entire Circus to one android, which means they'll all be sharing a single body, and the Circus will serve as their inner world.

shout out to all introjects forever

Make sure you clarify any questions you don't want to answer

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