𝐵𝑒𝓁𝓁𝒶𝒸𝒾𝒶𝑜

Your bedside clock striked twelve, sitting up as you let out a low groan, rain was hitting your windows causing it to echo the silent room. Today was your birthday, 21th birthday.

You dreamed that your life was gonna get better once you turned 18, and now its been 3 years and its time you realize it does not get better.

bedsheets sinked with your weight as you reached at the table beside your bed, opening your phone to be greeted with a sudden ring.

it was Kim Sunoo, your bestfriend. You first saw him when he applied on a rainy friday night, he was soaking wet but his resumes were neatly dry.. and thats what impressed you.

ever since he got accepted in, you both started hanging out, learning things about one another, you even found out about him having an ex boyfriend, Nishimura Riki. He is a fine man, someone no one can ever compete with, he is a complete gentleman and is great with handling kids(Sunoo told you).

Sunoo broke up with him the same day he applied for the job, he told you all about it. Telling you that Riki was having a hard time with his sexuality, he explained that he suddenly just became different.

it was very clear to you that Sunoo was into guys. Days passed by after he told you about his situation, you tried your best not fall for him, but nothing worked. He was one of the people you let in your life, the one who you run to when family problems strike you.

befriending him wasnt hard, but pushing your feelings was. This was wrong. It feels like your disrespecting his choice when it comes to choosing the gender he loves. So to avoid it, you meet up with another guy, Choi Beomgyu.

Varsity player, top of his class, and graduated in computer engineering. You love him and he loves you, both of you saw each other in one of the booths at your university.

He took a liking in you when you bumped into him again but at the library, asked you about your hobbies and thats when you started to date.

He graduated first leaving you in college for one more year, you told sunoo about him.

Sunoo has became your ride or die ever since you first laid your eyes on him. It has been 3 years since you were introduced to him in work, you met beomgyu a year later.

a buzzed interrupted your thoughts, glancing at the phone in between your hands, you held it up to meet your gaze as your eyes landed on Sunoo's birthday greetings, no beomgyu in sight.. Weird. Beomgyu always greets you midnight sharp, but tonight there was no signs of him in your message list.

Your fingers grazed your keyboard, thanking sunoo and agreeing on hanging out with him later in the morning.

1:26 AM(AUGUST 7). Still no signs of beomgyu, refreshing your feed to make sure, you shook away the thoughts, maybe he was just busy with work? I mean he doesn't really have to greet you every midnight on your birthday but a small part of you still ached.

Sighing as you plopped on your bed, placing the covers on top of your body while still gripping your phone. The gentle draft of air coming from your fan made you shiver as you buried yourself under the covers.

'Maybe when I wake up, he will be here.' A single thought remained in your mind with hope and lingering, you haven't seen your boyfriend in 2 weeks.

morning wasn’t any different, you woke up and did your usual routines, take a shower, and prepare for work.

locking your front door as you embrace the chilly ambiance of the after rain, smell of dry soil from plants and damp musty earthy scent that came from wood.

your shoes squelching each step of the pathway, as your hair swayed with the sudden air.

digging in your pockets, your hand suddenly feeling the pointy object as you grabbed it, unlocking the front door of your workplace, and pushing the glass door open.

fragrance from flowers waft your nostrils, as you flip the sign to ‘open’. Going in the back, you wore your designated apron, your name in soft font at the other side of your chest, and a floral pattern below on the skirt level.

No signs of your boyfriend. No messages, no visit, no beomgyu.

you dozed off while wiping the counter while the spray was in your other hand. It doesn’t feel like it’s your birthday, it feels like just another ordinary day.

“Goodmorning Y/n!” A cheerful voice came while the door was pushed opened. “Happy Birthdayyy Jjokkomi!!” Sunoo’s voice bloomed as he greeted you with a side hug, bag still hanging loose on his side, clothes still neat.

chuckling as you patted his head while he was still gripping on to you like a lost koala. “Thank you Sun” he unclipped himself off of you, slightly frowning. “Why do u seem dull? is there something wrong?”

you continued wiping the counter, as he looked at you. “Beomgyu must have forgotten my birthday..” it came out of your mouth in a raspy tone, almost as if you were on the verge of breaking down.

Sunoo sighed walking away to hang his bag on the back, glancing from behind you, he reappeared while softly untying the knots on his apron, his focus on his fumbling hands as he opened his mouth to say something. “Forgotten is a strong word Y/nie, maybe he just.. i dunno like..” his voice trailed into a mumble, while still untying the cloth.

“Forget, forgot, he forgotten Sunoo I swear!” you cut him off, while bringing your focus on the counter, your hand was burning through the sensation of the towel being in your hand for the past 20 minutes, counter was sharply clean, the lavender scent of the spray casually dried itself.

he managed to get the knot out as he pulled the long ties behind his back, tightening it to make it secure, he sprayed alcohol on his hand as he rubbed it making his way beside you. “You know, you shouldn’t be to hard on yourself. It’s your birthday, you deserve a break too.” he responded, his eyes glistening with worry as he placed his hands beside yours on top of the table.

you stared back at him, eyes glossy, hair slightly damp, breathing much slower, as you finally stammered, “You’re right.. Im sorry, I just feel so worn out...” looking down at your feet as your hands dropped to the side, spray and towel in both hands, he watched every move you made as he only chuckled, “Don’t apologies silly-“ he opened one of the drawers below the counter as he grabbed newspapers. “Come on let’s start wrapping” he continued with a warm smile.

you look up at him and flashed a wry one, your feet already moving to the supply room to return the cleaning supplies.

12:25 PM. Lunch break, still no message from Beomgyu, not even a presence. You were devastated but lucky for you, Sunoo dragged you in one of his favorite hangout spots, a small cafe with brown carved walls, automatic sliding doors, and the fun part is, its a pet cafe! you get to pet dogs, different types.

the aroma of coffee being grilled was the first thing u noticed when you first entered, Sunoo brought out his wallet, as you fidgeted the belt loops of your pants, something feels wrong.

the cashier smiled at the both of you, a man probably years older than you guys? he has dark brown locks and a sharp jawline, his smile was kinda boxy type.

Sunoo ordered first as your eyes examined every drink and pastry on the digital menu board. “What about you Ms?” a velvety voice brought you back as you were close to spacing out.

the cashier named Kim Taehyung, stared at you as his hands rested above the monitor, you stayed quiet as you stared back at him, Sunoo noticed the tension as he nudged you by his elbow.

“oh uhm- I’ll be getting the uh- Café de Olla.” you mutter, as you quickly grabbed your wallet from your bag, the cashier ringed your order still smiling at you, Sunoo couldnt help looking in between you and the guy, he stopped you as he gave his card.

“what.. are you- are you sure? I can pay I swear.”

“its my treat, its your birthday so no biggy.”

he always does that, make reasons, even the smallest reasons just to pay for your food, EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.

“happy birthday, gave you a discount to brighten you up” he smiled happily as his gaze looked between you and the monitor, you thanked him happily, as the guy beside you only tightened his grip as his eyes glared daggers.

the receipt was printed out as he gave you, your hands were about to grab it until Sunoo snatched it and grab your hand to one of the chairs, leaving the cashier frowning, dumbfounded.

you were blabbering about something as Sunoo glanced at the receipt, he guessed it right as the guy Taehyung wrote his number at the back of the paper, he crumpled it and shoved it inside his sling bag.

as the drinks came, you thanked your best friend and started to talk about something else. No you didn’t bring up Beomgyu, not even once.

Sunoo listened persistently as he kept adding jokes make you both laugh uncontrollably.

the main door opened again with a soft, smooth woosh, making you both glance up, a big mistake.

it was Beomgyu and a girl.. his arm was hanging loosely around her arm, they were both laughing about something, as one of his hand intertwined with hers.

you froze, you couldn’t stop the tears from pouring as your grip from the cup loosened, your legs feels like jelly, as your throat feels like it was choking on unsaid words.

Sunoo on the other side was raging, he was raging mad the second his eyes landed on the two figures, he didn’t think, he doesn’t need to. He made his way out of the booth you guys were in, you called for him as his mind was blurry.

Beomgyu saw him as the arm draped over the girl dropped to his side, he was about to greet Sunoo when a fist met his face, he stumbled backwards, instinctively touching his face in pain, “wha- what the fuck is your problem dude!”

the girl he was with helped him up checking his face for brutal injuries, Sunoo slightly smirked in satisfaction as he opened his mouth to say something. “Do you really have to do this? on your girlfriends birthday? what kind of a asshole are you?”

Beomgyu was stunned as his eyes looked over behind Sunoo’s to see you sprinting forward, eyes puffy and mouth quivering.

“And you-“ His eyes landed on the blonde hair beside Beomgyu, “do you bitch on taken men for a living with your shein outfit? come on give me a break.” She gasped bringing a hand to her chest.

your hand grasped on his arm, an invitation to leave as you made your way to the main door.

“wait- baby please- im sorry-“ beomgyu reasoned as you only ignored him, they both argued inside the cafe as the staffs demanded them to leave.

you were 2 minutes away from the shop as you stopped mid track, “You dont have to do that, you know..” you glanced up at him examining his face for bruises. “I do actually, cause I know you will just drag me out of there and let it all slide. Know your self worth Y/N.” he was dead serious, not even using the nickname he made for you.

you sighed as you blinked through the new tears forming in your eyes, lashes fluttering as you looked away. “I got you don’t worry, you will always have me.” he smiled warmly, taking your hands in his soothing it slowly, as if giving you a chance to pull away but you gave in his touch, letting a small smile form from your lips.

you both entered the shop to see a couple of customers observing the flowers, your other co worker, Daniel, was wrapping something as his eyes dropped to the both of you.

“so glad you guys are back, a customer was asking if we had purple oranges? do we even sell an orange plant?” his brows furrowed as he fumbled with the tape dispenser, you quietly chuckled as Sunoo only stared at you, “I’ll check.” you said putting your apron back again.

They both nodded, as Daniel cleared his throat, “So.. you and y/n?” he blurted out as Sunoo looked at him wide eyes, “bitch what?! no way, im into guys remember? theres no way..” he quickly answered, as daniel looked at him curious. “that was fishy but alright alright, no need to get defensive.”

Sunoo rolled his eyes and grabbed a watering can to water some dried plants, he was humming a tune not noticing the presence beside him, the familiar scent of strawberries mixed with air conditioning made him turn his head, seeing his ex boyfriend Riki.

“hello love” riki called him out pretending to look for some flowers, “the fuck are you doing here hoe?”

“hoe? thats one way to put it.” the taller and much broader guy laughed as his eyes crinkled teasingly.

“yeah for some guy who preferred work over his own boyfriend.” Sunoo said sharply as his foxy eyes glared daggers on the teasing remarks.

“besides, I found someone much better than you.” his tongue clicked, and thats when you suddenly came through the back door, wiping the tears you shed when you were alone, as you held the silver scissors.

you walked beside sunoo, focused on the sharp thing on your hands as your mouth opened, “hey sun how does this cut in triangular shapes-“ looking up to see the men staring deeply into eachother. “again..” you trailed

“hey baby” sunoo’s call made you snap your head towards him, eyes widen for a second until you realized what was going on.

his hand slid down your waist pressing you firmly against his body, as heat creeped from your neck, suddenly feeling like your clothes were to tight. The customers minded their own business, as Daniel had his mouth open wide while the tape fell from his grip.

“a woman? seriously? have you got no more boytoy that you settled with a filthy girl?” he scoffed, looking away as he dishevel his hair, straightening his posture.

“filthy girl? you literally look like a temu copy of the that woman in squid game..” you mumbled as your fingers made its way to the folded hem at the bottom of his long sleeve.

“what my girl said.” Sunoo grinned, Riki was fuming badly that you can see smoke coming out of his ears, he snuck his middle finger and stormed out of the store, bumping into someone as he apologized rapidly.

“so about this?” you started as your eyes went down the metal piece, his hand lingered as he dropped his hand on your waist, while he continued watering, “show me.” you nodded as you went beside him, focusing on the question more than the ghostly touch of his fingertips gripped on your side.

8:02 PM the bus dropped you at your place, opening the door as you suddenly collapsed at the floor, stuff scattered as your bag fell down your shoulder.

you sob uncontrollably, hands clenching your knees, the silence of the empty apartment suffocating you.

It was your birthday. A day that was supposed to mean something, yet the only thing you had to show for it was a shattered heart and a relationship built out of mutual panic. Every corner of the room felt like a reminder of what was missing. Your father’s sudden disappearance years ago had left the house cracked, and your mother’s breakdown had shattered the rest. You had spent your entire life trying to glue the pieces back together, holding onto Beomgyu like he was the anchor keeping you from drifting into the dark.

But he wasn't an anchor. He was just another person who walked away while you weren't looking, as if you were just a plant that he can leave unwatered.

Two weeks of silence. Two weeks of staring at a blank screen, wondering what was happening between the two of you, only to find him laughing in a cafe with someone else. The image burned behind your eyelids every time you blinked—his smile, the way he looked at her, the complete absence of regret.

Your chest aches so deeply it feels physical, a hollow, crushing weight that makes it hard to pull air into your lungs. You look around the quiet room, the exhaustion of fighting through every single day finally catching up to you. You are just so tired. Tired of being the one left behind, tired of pretending to be okay for the sake of the flower shop, and tired of feeling entirely invisible in your own life.

You pull your knees closer to your chest, burying your face in your arms as the tears continue to blur your vision, wishing more than anything that you could just turn off the noise in your head.

‘do it.’ a burning whisper echoed in your mind, eyes shut tight as you tried to calm down, fingers pinching on any part of your skin to make u remember that, this— this is all real, and no matter what you do, you can never escape the hunting whispers of the deadly desire burned deep in your mind.

standing up, not even bothering to clean up the mess you made, shoes left untied on the ground as you were left wearing your socks, the fabric of your socks brushing against the wood grains.

your bedroom door was wide open, walking in with a hunched back, your hair was a ruined, static halo, individual strands clinging to your damp cheeks and sticking to the tears drying on your neck, face glistening with tears as sweat beads formed on your forehead.

you grabbed a chair dragging it across the room, the heavy wooden legs caught against the floorboards, letting out a sharp, shuddering screech that echoed off the empty walls.

a hidden rope that was below your bed was now in your palms, as you clenched onto it like it was your life support, not knowing it can be the one to take yours away.

you were about to do it, you were gonna do it, until you remembered your bestfriend. What will he think? waking up in a random morning to find out you aren’t here anymore?

the guilt stayed as a lump in your throat, as you shoved the rope away, your eyes started to blur with a fresh wave of tears, the harsh reality of what you almost did finally crashing down on you.

Your hands shook violently as you scrambled away from the rope, pulling your knees tightly against your chest as ragged, breathless gasps filled the quiet room. You wept out of pure panic and exhaustion, the guilt tearing through your chest—until a sudden, sharp buzz from your phone shattered the silence.

The screen illuminated the dark floorboards, displaying a notification that made your breath hitch. It was a text from Sunoo

Sun☀️😛: Are you home safe?

Sun☀️😛:typing…

Sun☀️😛:Make sure you eat some of that birthday cake I got you, okay?

Looking at his name through your blurred vision, the knot in your throat tightened, but the terrifying urge completely vanished. You weren't invisible. Even in the dark, he was still reaching out to hold you here.

you hesitated to reply but did, slowly choosing your words properly, as your fingers hovered the keyboard, sight still slightly blurred.

Yeah, Thank you Sun.

Sun☀️😛:You’re still awake? girl go get that beauty sleep you BADLY need, xoxo.

Alr Goodnight…

closing your phone, as you stared at your own reflection in the black screen. What has gotten into you?

you were so close to loosing it, you wished you can end it all easily but when Sunoo entered your life and never left, it feels like he was your own personal savior.

In a world that constantly tried to pull you up by the roots and discard you, Sunoo was the only soil that held you firm.

You had spent so long adapting to the dark—learning to grow in the heavy shadows of a broken home and a father who walked away. You truly believed you were a plant that didn't need the sun anymore, perfectly content with withering in secret.

But Sunoo was an undeniable, stubborn light. No matter how deep into the dirt you tried to sink, he would stretch his warmth out until it reached your coldest corners, anchoring you back to the earth and forcing you to face another day.

You couldn’t bring yourself to step into the dark permanently, not when he was working so hard to keep you alive in the light.

The room was pitch black until the clouds parted, allowing a pool of pale, watery light to spill quietly onto the floor. The dusty floorboards below you was imprinting dirt on your uniform, as the silence flooded over your room, gently filling every space.

your eyes were tired, emptiness and hopeless filled it, you rub your eyes yawning quietly, as you sat at the floor, back against the soft, comfy mattress of your bed.

you fell asleep holding your phone, the warm device gripped into your sweaty palms, the rope tangled on-top of a wooden chair, your bedroom door wide open, as the stuff scattered on the floor was visible.

11:51 AM(AUGUST 21) “you okay? you seem really down today Jjokkomi..” Sunoo’s melodic voice rang through your ears like a lullaby luring you to sleep, he was following you all day asking why you were so gloomy, considering what happened 2 weeks ago with beomgyu..

“im fine sun, cut me some slack.” you said, ringing a customers bouquets, hand automatically waiting at the edge for the receipt as you hand it over. “hmm..” you heard him mumble, ignoring him as you went to wrap something up, mind completely focused on carefully wrapping that you didn’t notice the mischievous presence behind you.

a pair of arms locked around your waist, as he buried his head on your neck, sniffing your scent while ruffling his hair on your bare skin.

you tried ignoring the forming smile on your lips as well as the warmth on your cheeks. This doesn’t feel to bad, its been weeks since u felt a nice warm hug.

sniff “wow you smell really—” sniff “good~” Sunoo muttered while still craning on your neck, you giggled, “yeah more like sweat” he shook his head as he moved away looking at you, “No no no- you smell like… like Water Lilies”

you stared at him, observing his posture, his wrinkled long sleeve, apron filled with dirt, and his black hair styled amazingly as if he had his own personal stylist.

he was talking about something but every sound he made was blurred, as if he was being censored by your mind. You couldn’t help but look up at his face to admire his plump pinkish lips, his eyes that look like they can kill any second.

a hand waved on your face snapping you surprisingly, “heeeellllllooooooo— earth to Y/nnnn” he waved continuously, as you grabbed his wrist mid wave, strong enough to keep him firm but not hurt. “aishh.. you look like your swatting away a fly infront of my face”

“HOE— I didnt know you have such a strong grip” he was wriggling his wrist out, making you laugh softly, you like teasing Sunoo, every single time you have the chance.

playful insults, light pinching and smacks were your love language with him, even Daniel had to pull you two apart trying not to interfere.

the feelings you have kept and treasured for Sunoo slowly faded like dust when Beomgyu came into your life, abandoning and shutting those feelings down as you see him everyday.

but right now, all you wanna do was, be with him

tell him that he matters and you will do everything just to keep him safe, despite your emotional well being.

the chaos was disrupted when the bell above the door jingled and started to sway, indicating a customer arrived.

the three of you pretended like nothing happened, cleaning and wiping spots that was already clean.

“Hey, I know you,” the customer said, dropping the reusable bag onto the counter, his eyes wide. He pointed a finger slightly. “You’re the one who ordered that complicated coffee at Vante Coffee last week. The barista, Taehyung was totally flirting with you! He even gave you his employee discount, right?”

You froze, the cleaning rag dropping from your hand. You remembered the discount, yes, but you had assumed he was just being polite. “Taehyung?” you repeated, your voice a faint squeak.

Behind you, the sound of Sunoo violently snapping a pair of shears shut echoed like a gunshot. He stared at the barista, his jaw tight. “You mean the cashier who served our order?”

“Yeah!" the barista replied brightly, oblivious to the fact he was arming Sunoo with emotional artillery. "Taehyung doesn't usually pay attention to anyone, but he actually commented on your order when you left. Said you were ‘refreshingly unbothered’ considering your order was very rare.”

He glanced directly at you, leaning conspiratorially over the counter. "He said he gave you his number, right? Wrote it on your coffee receipt when you paid? Did you use it?"

Your world tilt on its axis. His number? You hadn't even noticed. Behind you, the sound of Sunoo’s pruning shears clicking was replaced by a deafening silence. It was a silence that felt heavier and more suffocating than the entire chaotic afternoon combined.

“I didnt noticed.. my friend Sunoo had the receipt, right Sun?” you glance behind you to see his neutral expression, snapping his attention back at you as he spoke, “huh?- oh yeah- well I didnt notice, pretty sure there was no number..” hands beside him started soothing his pants in order to calm down, why was he acting like this?

He is just your bestfriend, why is he trying to get every man out of your way?

the customer looked at him suspiciously as he clicked his tongue, “okay.. so anyways, I was planning on buying tulips go surprise my mom, do you guys have some?” he changed the topic and started walking on the other direction, you nodding as you followed, leaving Sunoo thinking as he sprayed water on the plants multiple times even causing some of the pots to flood water.

‘this is all wrong.. im not supposed to like girls.’

Daniel saw the tension as he was cutting out the thorns in the roses, and only shook his head in disbelief, just two best-friends still pretending not to care about each other deeply.

Time is running like the sand in an hourglass—just when you think it’s running out, you flip it over and realize every moment is a chance to start fresh

03:47 AM(OCTOBER 6) You rubbed your eyes trying to get the sleep dust off, phone in one hand rereading Sunoo’s message.. ‘Its 3am what is he on..’

Sun☀️😛: Missed call

Sun☀️😛:Hey.. Im sorry to wake you up, I just badly need to see you rn.. meet me at the convenience store.. xoxo walk safe:3

Slipping on your slippers, you looked over at your table to see the ashtray with dozens of cigarette buts, tissues scattered stained with a dark, rust-colored blotch.

You pulled a hoodie down your head, Beomgyu’s old hoodie, to cover the fresh uneven lines carved in your wrist, a reminder that life was exceptionally cruel.

you bent down to tie your shoe laces as you grab your keys.

it has been 2 months since your birthday, life was still the same but you realised that you were better off without Beomgyu, you already have your bestfriend Sunoo, what else can u ask for?

the air outside was chilly, not cold enough to send shivers down your spine but cold enough to not make you uncomfortable.

passing down the convenience store down the road, you saw Sunoo sitting inside as he waved at you to come in.

pushing the door with all your might as you stepped in, inhaling the mixed scents of noodles, coffee, and nicotine.

you walked between the shelves as you took a seat. Glancing up at the boy beside you, his posture was still the same, but he looked really messy..

his hair was scattered as his forehead had beads of sweat, sleeping clothes not worn properly that one of the buttons were undone, face was pale and chapped lips.

“Are you okay Sun?” you broke the silence, examining his state as he only looked at the table.

“I had a bad dream.” he started still not looking at you

“what kind of dream?”

“a dream were you died.”

the background seemed to have been muted as your whole world paused. The times you attempted made you sick, it felt like you were gonna throw up.

all the guilt and exhaustion drained out of you as your hand creeped its way slowly on the table, reaching out for his.

you held it gently and started soothing circles using your thumb. “Im not going anywhere, I promise Sun.”

he finally looked up and you saw his eyes were glossy as a tear dropped followed by another as he started crying, he broke and brought you into a tight, desperate hug.

“I love you.” he mumbled while still sobbing in your neck, you were caught of guard by the sudden words as you patted his back softly.

“I love you more” pinching and smacking each-other wasn’t just your love language, you also share deep meaningful talks with Sunoo, thats how great of a best friend he is.

Sunoo pulled back just enough to look you in the eyes, his grip tightening on your shoulders. "No," he breathed, his voice cracking. "I love you... as in I love you.. Im sorry I couldn’t do this anymore.”

The words hung heavily in the air between you, and for a moment, the world felt entirely still. The realization hit you like a sudden wave, making your chest tighten. Not as a best friend. Romantically. Your mind raced as you looked at his tear-stained face—knowing everything he had been through, knowing how he had always identified, and suddenly feeling the sheer gravity of what he was risking by telling you this.

"Sun.." you whispered, your voice failing you. "But you... I thought you were—"

"Gay?" Sunoo cut in softly, a sad, self-deprecating smile brushing his lips as fresh tears pooled in his eyes. He let out a shaky breath, his hands sliding down from your shoulders to gently cup yours.

"I am, but I thought," he confessed, his voice barely above a whisper. "I spent so much time trying to figure myself out, labeling what I felt, thinking I had it all mapped out. I thought being into guys meant my heart was completely closed off to women. But then there's you. The universe kept throwing us together, and no matter how hard I tried to deny it or fit myself into a box, my heart wouldn't listen."

He squeezed your hands, his gaze fierce and desperate. "Loving men doesn't change how deeply, completely, and irrevocably I have fallen for you. You are my exception, or maybe you're just my rule. All I know is that what I feel for you is real, and it’s louder than any label I've ever given myself."

you stared at him wide eyes, unable to form proper sentences. “And also… if your worried about our friendship, I still see you as my bestfriend—“ he paused, “just more special.”

your throat started to hurt as you hugged him again, warm tears ran your face while you buried it more deeply into his neck, feeling like you were gonna loose him.

“Ive liked you too ever since you step into that flower shop.” you chuckled wiping your tears looking up at him, he flashed you a bright smile, reaching up into his eyes.

thats when you realised

That maybe, there is something or someone worth living for.

6:30 AM(OCTOBER 12) “really sun?…its like 6:30 in the mornihhng..” you answered, eyes rapidly blinking due to sleepiness, voice still raspy, as you covered your mouth to yawn.

Sunoo here, pulled you from your bed to go with him in a morning walk, a fucking morning walk.

“You need to radiate yourself with some vitamin C girl!”

“its vitamin D..” you mumbled grabbing a brush to untangle your hair, shirt still tucked in your pajamas.

“vitamin C or D whatever! you need to see some morning sun sometimes” he said crossing his arms, he was wearing a fine-knit, dusty rose cardigan that fit him perfectly. It wasn't bulky—instead, the soft fabric draped elegantly over his shoulders, catching the morning light.

Sunoo looked breathtaking.

“can you hurry your ass? I don’t have all morning for this, we need to get to work in 8” he hissed as his eyes rolled as if it was gonna pop out of his eye sockets.

“yeah- yeah yeah no need to get so feisty.” you said lowering your tone as you applied sunscreen, dabbing it softly to make your skin lessen its visible pores.

he started scrolling on his phone while you slip on a thin mint green jacket pairing it with some easy to wear sandals.

hand about to open the drawer below your vanity to grab your hair tie, you saw blades inside a pile of paper.

your breath hitched, sending a jolt of pure panic through you. Without a second thought you closed it shut, hand still pressed flat on the plastic.

Sunoo looked at your reflection meeting your reaction, “are you okay babe? you look like you saw a ghost?” you nodded continuously, gulping down the saliva that was forming in your mouth.

“OH— yeah im fine— I thought I saw a spider— or a insect I think..” reassuring him, as you continued brushing your hair, deciding to leave it like that.

“SPIDER? GOSH WHERE—“ he quickly reacted dragging you out of the chair, hugging you tightly.

your face was crushed onto his chest as you lifted your head to inhale fresh air, “THERES NO SPIDER SUN— LET GO OF ME PLEASE” he laughed nervously as he let you go, “You were so close to crushing me to death, you know?”

“well you’re alive aren’t you?” gosh he was smirking, he was always so fast with his remarks, especially when things escalated between you after the convenience store, you weren’t together but something more than best friends now.

“blah blah, lets go..” you said smacking his arm lightly as your sandals clicks each step you took.

he only snickered behind you, following you to the door.

10:02 AM Daniel walked in holding crates of flowers as he laid them on the large table, letting it down with a loud clank, as the table wobbled at the sudden drop. “I am so excited so show you guys the new delivery!”

you stared at him and back to the crates, he reached behind him to grab the towel and wipe his face, “new flowers? again? didn’t we just received three last week?”

“uhm, well they said these ones are extraordinary and very rare to see in flower shops.” he said putting emphasis on rare, as he pressed his hand on of the crates. “Call your loverboy please”

you sighed pressing a hand to your temples, “Sun! Daniel wants you!”

“be right there bitches!” cluttering noises echoed as he came running, the older man beside you only let out a loud sigh as he opened the crate.

you three bent down to look at the small flowers that has tiny beads of water running down, inhaling the smell as you looked at Sunoo who looks dreamy. “Thats what you smell like Y/nieee you smell like water lilies! smell of fresh nature” he giggled as you only shook your head.

“okay enough of that Sunoo, carry some of those crates and bring it with me at the back.” Daniel said, as he grunted carrying 3 stacks all at once.

12:49 AM(OCTOBER 14) “Baby what are we doing?” you lingered beside him, kicking some stones on the ground. “I wanted to go to the playground with you—I couldn’t sleep..” he shivered, other hand adjusting his sweater.

your fingers were intertwined with him as you started swinging it playfully, when you saw Sunoo at your doorstep asking you to tag along you didn’t hesitate, you knew something was wrong.

“having nightmares again Sun?” glancing only to see him nod once, your gaze turn to the road ahead.

“I kept dreaming about me loosing you..” he started, as you both arrived at the park. Dim lights and benches, you dragged him towards the swing as you sat

your eyes focused on him, asking him to continue, he took a swing softly as he suddenly stopped. “It was like— different versions of us, and it always ends the same way..” he swallowed a lump looking at you with teary eyes, as the wind gushed his wavy, long hair.

“me dying? Gosh, Sunoo I would rather eat a dead mice than leave you.” you get up the swing and kneeled infront of him, looking at him straight in the eye. “Baby you know I love you, right?”

taking his hands on yours as you massaged it gently, causing his shoulders to lessen its tension as he started calming down

he suddenly went closer and grab your jaw to close the gap, a soft smooth kiss, your first ever kiss with him since you both got together.

sure you kissed him many times, but on the cheek, never on the lips. You both knew when the both of you are now comfortable with each other you’ll do it.

you just never expected it to be in a playground, swinging on swims and talking about some silly dreams.

dropping his hand on his lap as you kissed him back, fingers tangled into his hair as you deepened it, you sat on the ground as he followed you kissing you momentarily, savoring every moment.

your tongue slid past his lips, a soft, breathless swipe that sent a jolt straight to your chest. Sunoo let out a quiet, muffled sigh into the kiss, his grip tightening as he met you halfway. It was sweet and dizzying, a beautiful tangle of warmth and soft gasps for air.

By the time he tilted his head to deepen the angle, you were completely lost in the taste of him, your fingers curling tighter into the soft strands of his hair.

his fingers hovered your pajamas as he held one of your thighs, you whimpered when it gets lower any second and now he was circling the damp cloth.

“nghh—baby agh—“you muttered into the kiss as he shushed you and started biting your lip softly, as you moaned, “baby- we cant- do this here-“ you spoke as he paused taking his hand off your clothed clit as he stopped kissing you, saliva connecting your mouths as he was in between your thighs.

“well lets go home then lover” he suggested, smirking as he licked his lips, tasting the mixed liquids on it.

he eagerly ran you two back home as he started undressing everything that is clothed and you know what you did

3:57 PM(OCTOBER 18) Phone in your hand as your fingers started typing.

Baby where are you? you’re taking so long

Myprettyboy💕: girl im 3 minutes away.

okay well hurry up I miss you.

Myprettyboy💕:Yes maam🫩

you chuckled closing your messages, you both decided to meet each-other infront of the plaza to eat some sushi in the new restaurant you saw the other day, after what you guys did in the playground..

while waiting for him, you cant but notice a tiny cat crossing the road very slowly, small figure taking each step very careful.

you looked around as you started walking the pedestrians lane to get the cat off the road.

you got it successfully, as you were about to cross the road again a car passed by very fast

‘Thank God the cat wasn’t to heavy, I could have died’ deadly thoughts lingered in your mind as your breathing got heavier and your heartbeat started beating abnormally fast.

a jogging sound came behind you as you looked behind expecting Sunoo, as you were greeted by a sudden pain in the abdomen.

what you didn’t notice when you saved the cat was a robbery on going.

your face dropped as the robber got your bag and ran away, knife still in his hand as you were dropped on the ground, laying on a pool of your own blood.

Many people gasped as you heard them screaming for 911, you could only mutter one word as you started feeling lightheaded. “Sunoo.”

Sunoo was walking, sling bag on draped on his shoulder, a mint green cardigan he owns to match with yours.

as he was about to pull out his phone to call you, he heard shouting as people circled something on the corner of the road.

he looked around, no signs of you

he quickly made his way to the crowd as he looked down, rescuers were checking you for pulse and placing it on the stretcher.

he gasped in shock, it all happened so fast as he pushed himself through, tears already running down his face, he explained that he was your boyfriend as he was rushed inside the ambulance.

he couldn’t answer any of their questions as he looked down at your pale body, white dress he brought for you now covered in crimson red blood, he reached for your hand as he gripped it.

bringing it close to his face as he prayed, he doesn’t believe in God, but thats all what he can think of right now.

He was willing to give up everything if if meant making you safe.

they arrived at the hospital as they rushed you in the emergency room, nurses scattered as they pull him back making him wait outside.

this is torture, all he can think of was waiting with you here but now you were in there fighting for your life.

he sat there shaking, bouncing his leg, hands pressed to eachother.

a nurse passed by with a tray, filled with vitamins or some shit he wasn’t sure, but all he was focused on was the two stems of waterlilies.

everything paused as he started to sob, chest breathing heavily as he started having a meltdown, he suddenly felt an arm on his shoulder, glancing up he saw Daniel, dressed in black.

“Sunoo, it’s her time.”

“D—daniel? fuck— your a grimm reaper?” he said shocked, as he faced him fully. “please im—“ he begged shaking as his face poured more tears, cardigan already ruined as strikes of blood were wiped on it. “im begging— don’t take her please..” he said as he started hiccuping

Daniel looked at him hopeless, as his arm dropped to his side. “There’s nothing I can do Sunoo.” he answered, as Sunoo only shook his head and started to cry more, everything and everyone started moving again as more nurses passed with doctors.

“CODE BLUE—EVERYONE CODE BLUE ON ROOM 289” a doctor said as they all rushed, Sunoo only looked at their figures as they went into your room.

4:20 AM(OCTOBER 21) He stared at your messages, he wished he just told you how much he loves you instead of being sassy.

the hospital contacted your family as they sorted out your funeral, it was gonna be tomorrow.

God, he couldn’t even eat or take a shower just like the old days, all he was thinking about was to be with you.

he quitted his job, started to bed rot all day, only staring at your old messages.

he was an absolute mess, as he started crying again for the sixth time this day.

he wanted to end everything, his life but no, he couldn’t bring himself to do it.

he was too weak.

so with all his strength, he stood up from his bed, put on a hoodie as he was gonna take a walk around his neighborhood to freshen his mind.

he knew that wouldn’t work, but notching else is working if you aren’t here.

as he was greeted by the cold air he pulled on his hood and started walking, he doesnt even feel anything anymore at this point.

he doesn’t know what to feel, pure rage or pure loneliness?

he was about to grab his phone in his pocket as he heard a cat meowing, he turned to the other side of the street to see a white fluffy cat with cyan eyes.

he walked towards it and started petting it, crying even more cause of how much the cat made him remember you

as he was feeling its soft furs it suddenly hissed, looking behind him. He was confused as he heard a gun clocked

“give me your phone.” a strangers voice rang behind him as he was about to stand up and run for his life he just sat there and continuously patted the cat.

“are you fucking dumb or what you dumb fucker?”

Sunoo laughed under his breath, “maybe a mix of both.”

a gun shot echoed the streets, as polices immediately came as neighbors started crying and screaming.

Sunoo’s body layed on the ground, exact same position you were in.

as the cat stayed beside him, purring towards his face sadly, as the cat teared.

he looked at it lifelessly as he mumbled, “Im gonna get her back.”

A soft knock came shuddering the wooden door “Emperor Kim?”

Sunoo groaned in response as he rubbed his eyes, yawning.

“The chancellor, Lady Y/N is waiting for you at the dining table.”

His ears perked up as if he has just won the lotto, quickly hurrying to his closet, “tell— tell her ill be preparing” he remarked, quickly undressing to meet you.

<Take your hand and I go under, I'm under and above>

You were running late, rushing your shower and rummaging your closet throughly, getting overstimulated cause you can't find the right hoodie to fit your uniform. You let a wry smile drop from your face while closing your closet, finally settling with a creamlike cardigan.

Your father was away telling you stuff like, he needs space to find a new job. You couldn't careless, you knew he was going home to another family due to the fact you heard him speaking to some woman on the phone, asking how the kids are. You hated your dad, but you can't do anything about it, he provides your needs and wants. Nothing to really complain about, ever since your mom ran away with some guy she met on a dating site, he went crazy.

You locked your front door, as your shoes clicked throughout the apartment building. You weren't rich but you weren't poor either. You settled with an apartment since it was close to your school. But as of now, you were in need of cash.

Your hands dropped at your skirt slightly fidgeting, as your id clicked in unison with your shoes, lace full of small pins and keychains. You reached for your pockets to get your phone out while slipping your earbuds in. Scrolling through your playlist, you walked past the alleyway that was below your building. Not being cautious enough to hear the hustling sounds of people running.

The ambiance made you tense as you took out one of the earbuds to look behind you, just to see guys around your age sprinting towards you, Kim Jay with his minions Choi Taehyun and Han beomgyu. They were taunting you, since you kinda owe them money.. You were to stubborn to not ask your dad instead.. But what would he think! You spent all of the money in alcohol and also a little bit for your figurine collections.. So what.

Your breathing got heavier as you ran, shaking your head to stop zoning out. You heard a loud yell from one of them, "Yah! You asshole come back here!" you weren't sure who shouted but you don't care

You ran gripping your phone as beads of sweat were starting to appear on your forehead, you were minutes away from the bus stop as it started to drive away. You let out a gasp as you hurried and jogged towards it. You starting banging on the door while trying to keep your pace. "Sir let me in! Please I'm gonna pay extra!" the driver looked over you with a blank face as he opened the doors, you glanced at your side to see them still at the end of the street, you went in the bus as the doors closed. Your fingers found its way to the straps of your bag, gripping it tightly.

Voices occurring outside as they stopped running. You let out a sigh you didn't realized you were holding, just stood near the door. You checked your face and wiped your sweat, before opening your wallet to grab some money.

Struggling to open your wallet because your hands were shaky, the bumps on the road made it worse, as you grabbed the bill the bus suddenly passed a big bump and you lost your balance. Your hands met the floor as you were face to face with someones shoes. Your stuff was a mess, you can hear beating in your ears and your face flushed bright red. Everyone was minding their own business but the awkwardness was eating you raw. While picking up your coins, you felt a light tap on your shoulder.

You looked up to meet an unfamiliar face, he was emotionless as he stared back at you, lips in a thin line while handing you some of your money. You mutter a thanks quietly, softly bowing your head. You gathered the coins and shoved it in your wallet as you stood up. The bus stopped as you walked out, you and that guy were the only ones who got out as you glanced at his back, with his uniform you suspected he must be from the Eunjang boys school. The whole embarrassing money drop thing made you forgot that Jay and his guys were chasing you earlier.

You sprinted towards your school building, wind blowing at your hair as the sun shines making you glow, inhaling the smell coming from food carts at the sides. Reaching the gate you tapped your id towards the scanner as the gate unlocked. As you went in, you didn't noticed a pair of eyes scanning and inspecting every move you made, Yeon Si-eun.

I looked away from her figure and continued walking. I couldn't help but think, who in their right mind will go to classes wearing all that? Her bag made those annoying deafening sounds. Everything about her was messy, her hair was filled with shiny clips with different colors. I wasn't really the type to care about girls.

I glanced at my shoes counting how many steps I take, as I heard someone call my name. "Si-eun ah!" Baku. I turned my head towards his voice, my hands at the side. Staring at him. "Wanna come with us later? Gonna pick up some chicks."

I shook my head, "No." Baku only groaned as he argued. "Your gonna miss out all the fun bro!" I started walking while ignoring his statements. My schedule today is to go to the library and go home.

The last bell finally rang, I cleaned my table carefully packing my stuff. Baku texted me about the "chicks" again but I archived his messages. I wore my bag and head out of the room, walking down the stairs as I tucked my hands in my pockets.

The air was chilly as I squinted my eyes heading to the bus stop. I sat down scrolling through my phone. Suddenly I heard light footsteps, I glanced at the ground as they settled beside me. Red shiny school shoes?

The air shifted slightly, I heard light shuffling as I slowly glanced, it was her. The girl from the bus earlier, except her hair was a mess and her uniform had cuts and her arms were full of purple bruises. What she looked like now was nothing to what I saw earlier, those sparkly clips were out of sight, and her noisy bag and stuff were tucked in her bag.

She was gripping her phone while staring at her shoes which was swinging by its own on the ground. I can hear her breathing as her chest heaved, I looked away as the bus arrived. She stood up much quicker as she stepped in the bus, wide eyes and whispering were all I noticed as I followed into the bus.

I didnt know what to do or what to ask, and for the first time in my life I actually wasn't sure of the next thing I'm gonna do. I stood there gazing at the streetlights that we passed by. I tried forgetting about it as the bus dropped me off the library.

Why do I even care?

The bus dropped me at the street below my apartment, I paid and walked out. My body was aching, even after running from Jay he still managed to caught me. He beat the living hell out of my body and even ripped my uniform. I wish that was all he did, but no.

He tried forcing me to kiss him and even gripped my thighs, so bad that I couldn't walk without it hurting. My hair is a mess, my hair tie was nowhere to be seen and my arms were bleeding because of him stomping on it. I'm even surprised I survived.

I went up to my apartment and unlocked it. I dropped my bag and dashed for the shower. As I finished I stared at the mirror, seeing a big gash on my face, a perfect slit, and purple scars at my legs, especially my arms.

I feel disgusting, I can still feel his hands roaming while whispering crazy shit on my ear.

After I got dressed, I didn't even bother eating and just left my bag on the floor. Tears shimmered my eyes as I gripped onto my pillow, I laid down on my bed as the sheets sunk on the sudden weight.

I hate how weak I looked infront of him, how I let him harass me so easily as If I was a toy he can play with. Well, atleast he won't bother me anymore because of my debt

I slipped my shoes on, only wearing dark blue sleepwear. I sluggishly reached my closet, grabbing a gallon of alcohol. Faint marks of tears dried on my face as I went outside.

Jay's house was below our building, minimalist and clean. I stood infront of it as I opened the liquid I was holding. Scattering the liquid as I reached the lighter from my pockets. I dropped the lighter as the fire started spreading, burning his doorway first, my eyes gleamed at the sight.

I bolted through my apartment, unzipping my bag and started to reach my phone. I quickly typed Jay's number, immediately blocking him. Not like he's gonna see it anyways.

My phone let out a ring, as I glanced at my lockscreen.

Baku : Hey, wanna hang tomorrow? I'll bring some guys

Baku : missed call

I ignored his message and went to sleep.

It was raining today, So I wore a jacket making sure to cover my arms, as my skirt was already long enough to reach below my knees. I quickly opened my umbrella, firemen were downstairs, rumors said the fire might be caused by Jay's electronic devices that he may have forgotten to turn off.

I passed by them seeing his body getting taken into an ambulance, burned like he just got ouf of the oven. My hand gripped onto my umbrella, satisfied. He thought he can get away with what he did, well he thought wrong.

I yawned reaching the bus stop, 10 minutes early. I reached for my phone, quickly checking my face, I had placed a totoro bandaid over the clean slit on my cheek. light makeup still intact, I tapped on my hair as it was filled with different accessories this time.

I closed my phone as I watched the scenes unfolding infront of me. Kids walking the pedestrian lane holding hands, a couple walking their dog around while grinning happily, small birds chirping on top of trees. A loud distant engine made me turn my head away from the sight. I stood up as the bus unlocked it's doors, I was glad it had a different driver this time.

I noticed the only open seat left was beside a guy, guy? Wait wasn't he the one who helped me yesterday. I quickly took my seat as the vehicle started moving again. I noticed he suddenly shifted while still focused looking out in the window.

I peered at his face, he looks very peaceful, and he kinda looks pretty?.. Wait Did I lock my front door today? I only remembered grabbing my umbrella...

I observed the other passengers, a guy who looks very tired was sleeping, a woman in her mid 40's probably talking to someone on her phone, madly blushing. The bus stopped as we got off. Yes we, the mysterious guy got off.

As I was gonna walk away, I heard someone call me, grabbing my attention. "yah!!" I turned around, as I gawked, it was Baku running towards me full speed. "Hey.. Baku, what's up?"

Baku had completely forgotten about Si-eun beside him as he went towards you, he placed his hands on his wobbly knees letting out sharp breaths. "why didnt you-" pant "answer my call yesterday?-" he let one of his hand fall ontop of your shoulder for support.

"You know, you could have just let me walk closer right? You don't need to run a whole marathon." you mumbled, glaring slightly. He regained his posture as if he didn't ran like he was getting chased by a bull or something. "huh what do you mean marathon?" he cheekily smiled, "wait why are you ignoring my question-" he glanced behind his shoulder to find Si-eun scrolling on his phone.

"oh yah btw this is Yeon Si-eun, one of my friends" The quiet guy at the bus observed you as you nodded nervously. "Si-eun, this is one of the chicks I was telling you about yesterday man, didn't know you and Y/N here are bus buddies, if you know what I mean." he cackled as you only ignored him, still staring at Sieun.

"nice to meet you" you let a soft smile as your eyes beamed, Baku looked between you and Sieun as he shook his head. "okay enough of that, see you later barbie." He pats your shoulder as he grabbed Si-eun, you can hear him telling him not to scare ladies with his eye staring and stuff.

You’re not gonna lie, Sieun is lowkey something, you can’t describe it but he is very different from the other guys you met, including Baku. But you brushed it off, walking towards your school. Your hair swaying with the wind, as your footsteps echoed in the entrance hall.

"aish.. Dude I told you to cut the staring thing, it's scaring the girls and it's pretty weird!" Baku complained, Sieun only straightened his back, hair slick as always, and face blank as empty like a research paper.

"Remember Nayeon? From the school down the road? She told me to never bring u again when we went out, told me you were giving her the creeps." He continued, as they reached the school's gate. "the feelings mutual." Sieun only muttered, as lead the way. Baku looked at him, eyebrows furrowed as he rolled his eyes.

They met up with Gotak, Gotak dumb as ever, agreed with Baku that Nayeon was the hottest girl they have ever seen. As they seperated ways, Sieun entered his first class, glancing at the two empty seats. His mind flashed with Suho and Beomseok, with everything that occurred, he isn't gonna lie. He did miss them.

He remembered, he was gonna visit Suho later after classes. He mumbled stuff as he listened at the lecture.

His bag draped over his shoulder, as he took the bus which was headed to the hospital. He brought a pen out from his uniform and wrote his name at the medical chart. His eyes took notice of Suho's peaceful figure. He sat down, observing, thinking. Thinking what to do next, until a loud pair of walking interrupted his thoughts.

He glanced at the window, as someone walked by, hurrying. He opened the door and glanced at the hallway, he saw you arguing with a nurse.

"where’s my dad?" you pleaded, as the nurse told you family members only. "fuck! The hell do you mean? Im his biological daughter, Let me in right now I need to see him"

“ma’am if you don’t calm down, were gonna call security.”

nurses pulled you aside, “oh I’m calm! I’m very much fucking calm!”

Your gaze was spinning as you massage your temples, you felt a pair of eyes, as you looked up. Sieun, feet already moving towards him. "Sieun? What are you doing here?" he didnt answer, as he looked at the room infront of him. You followed his gaze to see a man inside, sleeping.

You scanned the figure and the face, wait... Suho?

"Suho.." the only sound you let out, as Sieun looked at you slightly surprised but his expression didn't change. You walk near the door, about to grip the handle until you ask. "Can I?" he nodded, the door clicked as you went inside, Sieun behind you following as well.

The sounds of the ac, filled the room, as you glanced at Suho. "We used to deliver together.." you broke the silence, as Sieun observed you, you were sure as hell you weren't just 'delivery partners'. Looking up from Suho's body, you met Sieun's eyes, pure innocent looking ones. You weren't aware it was the complete opposite.

"if your curious.." you trail the soft sheets as you glanced at the table next to his bed, seeing the dried up flowers as its petals were already falling, you took out one of your glitter pens from your sling bag, clutching the chart while scribbling your name.

Sieun scanned every move you made as he crossed his arms while sitting down. You sat down beside him, close enough to feel the heat from his body but also far enough to draw boundaries that your arms and knees weren't touching, your bracelets clinking while you brush strands of hair tucking it behind your ear.

Silence lingered in the room, you kept stealing glances just to see Sieun still staring at Suho, you remembered you brought something as you grabbed it from your bag.

Banana milk, you stood up and hand it over to him. "No offense but, you look like you haven't eaten anything this whole day." you were nervous that he might decline your kind action, he hesitated but he took it, mumbling something you couldn't quite understand. You walked off, hand holding your phone and the other one reaching for the door, you paused and looked at him only to see him already looking at you. "It was nice spending time with you." you let out a warm smile as you walked outside, shutting the door gently.

Sieun kept his eyes on the door as he looked down on his lap to see the untouched drink, he reached to open the straw and stabbed the hole, he was quiet the entire time, he was confused because instead of you asking dozens of questions about what happened, you remained silent. As if, you can see the boundary between you two, and he liked that.

It's 8:40 when the bus dropped you at your street, the hospital wasn't very far away but it made you exhausted, tomorrow you were gonna go there again to bring your birth certificate. The hospital wanted proof that you and your dad are related, what kind of bullshit is that? Why would you even visit someone's dad in the first place..

A groan came from your mouth as you climb the stairs, it was making your headache much worse. When u reached your floor, you saw Beomgyu in front of your apartment door, even from afar you knew it was him. So you grabbed your textbook from your backpack and clutched onto it, you're pretty sure he knew what you did to Jay.

You stopped, a meter away from him, he let out a low chuckle as he looked at you. "do you think I'm dumb?" you brushed your hair from your face, yes you had the audacity to do that infront of him.

His eyebrows were furrowed while he let out a soft laugh, "you think being pretty will let you get away from what you did?" he stopped laughing, glaring at you as you saw his knuckles turned white because of how he was gripping it.

He suddenly swings a punch, you quick as ever dodged it kicking him in the torso. He let out a groan as he was about to grab your hair, you caught his wrist twisting it making him moan in pain. His other hand scratched your arm as you hissed in pain, the textbook you were holding met his head, as you slammed it onto him hard, the loud pang echoed the dark hallways.

His face was bleeding as you pulled him by his foot, slowly unlocking his apartment using his keys. You made him slouch on his sofa.

With the shit you did, your were confused how no one noticed, not even the neighbors next door, you closed the door behind you and walked towards yours. Luckily, your apartment was old fashioned, no cameras and the guards were downstairs.

You took off your shoes and placed it onto the shoerack where it always sat, making sure the door was locked as you started to undress, slipping into a shirt and pjs.

The arm beomgyu scratched was leaking small drops of blood, as you gently sprayed some rubbing alcohol, clencing your arm as your eyes shut in pain.

Jumping onto your bed, and snuggling into your soft blankets and plushies. Taehyun moved out days ago after finding out what happened to Jay, so you have nothing to be worried about.

Doom scrolling through your phone, fake news were flashing through your media as you fell asleep.

The next day was no different, same routines, breakfast, but today was a Saturday. Meaning, you get to use your free will in useless shit or you work for money. None of the above, you were gonna go to the hospital to bring your documents. You wore a white and black windbreaker jacket with simple pants.

The sky is cloudy as you slipped on your helmet, you weren't gonna ride the bus, you were gonna rollerskate the road all the way to the hospital, dumb idea yes but it was fun though, fun is always in your category.

Whirring sounds echoed the pavement as you hold onto your sling bag, while holding fresh neatly cut flowers wrapped into a news paper. Helmet clipped onto your head as you hummed your favourite song.

Door automatically opened as you greeted the front desk, documents placed with a soft thud, the nurse told you your dad's awake and is available to be visited.

You rolled into the elevator and was greeted by doctors, you reached your dad's floor while clutching the flowers. You opened his door in a second, as your mood dropped.

There was a woman who is about the same age as he is and there are children running around, your dad looking entertained as ever, his eyes dropped at the sight of you, his smile faded slightly as the children paused and the woman looked at you with pure disgust.

"hey sweetheart-" you cut him off, already fuming at his remarks. "what the hell dad? I know you don't want anything to do with me but atleast dont shove it onto my face" your throat dried as it feels like it was closing itself.

"you disrespectful young lady" the woman chipped in, glancing at you as she looked at your dad. "told you, she would pull off this silly little tantrum of hers." she said hissing, he looked at you softly, you only glared to the both of them.

"sweetie I know this is a lot to take in but please not now-"

"not now? When is it ever gonna be the time? All you do is push me away, gaslighting me with some of your silly work excuses, im tired of you lying constantly." your hand gripped as you almost lost balanced on your skates, head warm because of the helmets pressure.

They all stared at you, as the little demons sat down with their mom. "You even have the guts to bring your mistress, surely she's after your invisible money too." and that was it, you left the room leaving them in complete shock, you heard her arguing with your dad, as you rolled towards the next door, Suho's room.

Glancing at your watch, 9 am isn't so bad right? You gently opened the door, no one except Suho was in there. You let out a sigh, going in as you dropped your bag at the chair, you unclipped your helmet placing it alongside your bag.

The old dried up flowers were thrown into the trashcan by you, replacing it with new ones.

Sitting down with an exaggerated exhale, your legs were shaky due to the outburst you did while confronting your father and his hell of a mistress.

you and Suho drifted away over an argument, a stupid argument out in the rain due to his other friend Yeong-I.

its not because you wont be the only best friend Suho will have, its because she was pissing you off since the first day you met, invading to much on pretty much everything. You saw her peeking at your messages one day without your permission, you were in the washroom and when you got out everything went crazy.

Suho dragged you out of the mess, claiming that you shouldn’t be to harsh on Yeong-I, you tried explaining what happened but it only made it worse, you left him outside all alone, you were angry. You told him to stay away and now..

the guilt made you emotional, blinking away the upcoming tears while tapping nervously on your knees because of the memory you remembered.

sniffling, you grabbed the medical chart and signed your name in, setting it down onto the table.

minutes turn to hours, you broke the silence and tried ranting to Suho like old days

the door suddenly creaked making you pause mid story, as you slowly glanced at the side.

it was Sieun, you stood up bowing slightly.

“Goodmorning Sieun”

“morning.” he answered still with his monotone voice and cold eyes, typical.

you sat down as you brought your stuff down the floor making space for him. He remained stiff like a statue as he stared at the newly brought flowers.

“you replaced the old ones?..” he asked, you blinked at him as heat creeped behind your neck, you softly nodded not really sure if he saw that but yeah. “mhm, it was really dried up, he might not like it..”

you swear his lips twitched as if he was forming a smile, your hand went into the chair next to you, you pat it quietly drawing his attention. “You should sit, your legs might hurt.”

he sat down, his mind was fuzzy not sure on what he wants to say until you spoke first, “Have you eaten?” breakfast. He doesn’t usually do breakfast, to busy prepping for exams and cram school.

he shook his head, the cold wind from the ac brushed his hair, the smell of soap and shampoo filled your nostrils.

his eyes remained at Suho, as you stood up grabbing your helmet while gripping your phone, you left your bag beside your chair, as you started rolling away, the click of helmet trailing.

he stared at you dumbfounded, not sure on what was wrong with what he said. His eyes roamed your back as it landed on the floor, he stared at your skates, it was in lilac colour filled with many stickers and unnecessary accessories.

he glanced at his phone, 30 minutes passed by and you still haven’t came back, maybe he did said something wrong.

his thoughts were interrupted when you came back holding a small paper bag with two coffees, the smell flew around the room, you sat down handing him his own cup and grabbing something in the paper bag.

A waffle

it was kinda captivating on how you didn’t bother him with questions like, “what do you wanna eat?” or “wanna got outside to eat?” you just stood and went outside to buy.

he softly nodded at you as a thanks, as you let a warm smile on your face, “i’m not sure if you like chocolate or peanuts so I got both of us the original, no flavors.”

Both of you ate in silence, soft chewing and slurping of coffees, exchanges of quick glances and sudden shifts on chairs.

this was nice, you finished yours first as you crumpled the paper and threw it in the paperbag, softly glancing if Sieun is finished but he was just frozen.

“Brain damage due to repeatedly kicked by lackeys.” he spoke, you let out a soft gasp as you glanced at Suho.

“doctors said the possibility of him waking up will probably take-“ he paused, feeling his breathing go heavy as his eyes twitched, he was doing his best to not cry or shatter infront of you.

you looked down at your lamp as you felt the guilt eating you, he got beaten up and you weren’t there to help him? your lips trembled as you remembered seeing his number pop up with multiple messages, but all you did was mute him.

“years.” Sieun continued as he felt his appetite slowly drifting, the waffle remained on his hands slowly becoming cold, the subtle steady ticking of the wall clock echoed, as you gripped your hands enough for it to leave marks.

“its not your fault.” you interrupted his train of thoughts, his mind was dwelling repeating the distress and trauma he faced, until that single sentence you said stopped it.

you glanced at his way to see him staring down at his shoes, eye brows furrowed and his mouth parted as if he was gonna say something.

“whatever is on your mind, it wasn’t your fault.” you paused before inhaling slowly, “You and Suho... you were really close, right? I notice how whenever anyone tries to get near you, you just... pull away. It’s like you’re trying to keep yourself distant on purpose. Like you think you aren't supposed to be okay.” his breath hitched and that was the final straw, a tear slipped from his eye followed by another.

You didn’t stared at him, gosh no that would be weird. Instead you gave him time to think, to recover and regain his composure.

No you didn’t pat his back, you didn’t hug him, you didn’t do anything, just settled beside him giving him time. That was your way of saying you are here for him. No dramatic monologues, no clingy touches, he clearly placed a very transparent wall between you indicating boundaries and you sticked with that.

You just met him like four days ago, you don’t want to look desperate while you cling on to him. Instead of rushing you wait, until that space between you will dissolve into thin air, you want him to realize that there is nothing wrong with being broken and thats okay.

Not everything can be fixed, sometimes they just need to be rebuilt, into something more beautiful.

He wiped his eyes quickly, long lashes wet with tears, hair messy because he suddenly got the urge to grip onto it. This feeling was different, you’re way to different on how you confronted him.

He most likely doesn’t break down like that, but with what you said, it got to the point where his sight blurred as his heart pounded heavily on his chest, he wasn’t upset about you invading, he was upset because you were right.

And for the first time after Suho got hospitalized, he felt like he can finally breath again, he cant reverse time and he most likely cant wake Suho up, but with what you said, it felt like something in him lightened up, Hope.

you looked away from him as you continued stirring your coffee, calm and steady.

Sieun watched you, his mouth opening slightly, “Thank you..” he spoke, his eyes glancing at your features, you felt his eyes on you as you looked at him, maintaining eye contact, you noticed how deep the bags under his eyes, his chapped lips, and his tired eyes.

The frown on your face melted into a warm smile, he looked away hiding the fact his lips were forming a small smile.

he actually felt comfortable with you? that was new.

the silenced took over, as you stood up taking hold of your bag and wearing your helmet, you rolled towards the door, before grabbing the handle you peered at him, “I'll get going now, see you" you plastered a smile, leaving and shutting the door behind you.

He didn't say anything, he just simply nodded, and stared at you going out. He didn't wave or told you goodbye, just allowed you to go without him speaking, this isn't the last time you'll see eachother, he knew that.

Days passed after the intense conversation at the hospital, okay maybe he was wrong.. He haven't seen you in a while, not a glimpse of you, Baku himself didn't mention you, you didn't visit Suho again, Sieun was actually concerned and worried about you.

Not worried that your skipping school or something, worried that something might happened to you and he didn't even get to talk to you again.

Negativity flooded his mind as he walked inside the old, quiet library. He went to the main table already knowing where to sit, his hand landed on the back of the chair slowly pulling it as he took a seat.

He took out his textbooks and started scanning it, he was caught by a sudden cough and sniffles as he glanced behind him, he saw You.

Wearing a plain grey sweatshirt, along with pjs, your hair was down and kinda messy, and your face was pale as if you were drained, you looked like you haven’t eaten these days.

'So that's why,' he thought, you were sick that's why you haven't been coming to your school.

His eyes studied you, the way the sweatshirt was twice your size, your hair steady and kinda oily, your eyes were tired.

You were reaching for something, and as you finally grabbed it, you felt eyes on your back, you hesitated to take a peak cause you were expecting a fully grown old man to be staring at you, but when your eyes finally met his, something in you calmed down.

You let out an exhale, as you nervously laughed, "Sieun ah- what a- wait not a surprise to see you here, but surprised cause we keep seeing eachother" you fumbled at your words gripping the book while letting a hand caress the back of your neck.

"Are you sick" was the first thing that came out of his mouth, he knew you were he just doesn't know what to talk about.

"yeah.. After I left the hospital I had a very high fever along with a cold- wait why are you asking? Did you miss me?" okay you were pretty bold that's all he can say.

He looked away and started scribbling something on his notebook. "very bold of you to assume l/n."

you held your chest in shock, as if you were just shot. “I have so many questions, first of all how did you know my surname?-”

“and plus that doesn’t answer my question Sieun ah” you took the seat across him, one knee crossed over the other, your hand on top of the table lightly tapping it. Sieun wasn’t dumb, when he first saw you in the bus, he researched you whereabouts faster than light.

“Baku mentioned it.” he spoke, almost coming out as a whisper, he was rereading the same sentence almost three times, he expected you to ask more but you were deadpanned.

your eyes narrowed at him slightly confused. “alright.. well it was nice seeing you, Sieun ahh. We really need to stop bumping into each other like this” you said playfully as you stood up, chair scraping as you grabbed the book about to go, until he stopped you.

“come with me” he stated, you glance towards him to see his eyes already staring at you, he gripped his pen as his other hand fidgeted with the edge of his notebook.

“where are you going? I thought you were studying something”

“to the pharmacy.” he said with ease, as he started packing, deliberately and careful, shoving textbooks and notebooks in his bag. “ahh your just using that excuse to spend time with me~” you snickered

he zipped his bag and looked at you, “lets go before I change my mind.” you salute at him and started to walk, shoes squeaking, shoulders slightly brushing, bags shuffling with every move.

the walk was quiet, not awkward silent that you thought it would be but the whole ambiance was comforting.

the doors automatically opened making you both step in, the reek of chemical medications assailed your nostrils and the sudden blast of cold air did not make you feel any better, it made your flesh crawl.

“so what are you gonna buy?”you said to cut the dead silence between you, he only looked at the pills and stocked bottles from the shelves.

you glance at the something for a minute and when you looked at your side Sieun was just gone, you swear you didn’t hear him, not even light footsteps.

the door opened with the ring and you glanced towards it, your hair swaying with the sudden air, your grip tightened on your bag, your palms getting sweaty.

Taehyun.

you tried looking away but it was no use, “Isn’t it the famous fire bender.” he chuckled as you felt him going closer, “I know what you did, and Im gonna make sure you pay.” his voice deep and mischievous sending shivers down your spine.

you looked at him, trying not to react. The pharmacy wasn’t really filled with people, only 6 people maximum including you and Sieun, also this guy in front of you.

careful not to draw attention, Taehyun had you pinned at the shelves, not pinning you with hands, he was kind of circling you. “I don’t know what you me-“

his hand came contact with your hair as he gripped it, not to hurt you but to mock you. “don’t play bullshit with me, y/n. You know what i’m talking about.” he hissed, you felt his hot breath at your neck.

“I only did that to protect myself, you know that Taehyun. Jay used to bully you too, and you know it.” your hands went up to push him but he was much stronger.

“bringing up my trauma just to cover what you did? typical woman.” he lets go of you and when you felt the space get bigger, you seize the moment to get away from him but he catches your wrist, his fingers dug into my wrist, gripping it sure enough to leave fingertip marks.

“where do you think your going, babe? we were just starting to have fun?” he laughed, you were confused, is no one seeing this?

“Taehyun let go of me I swear to-“

“Are you done?” you heard someone speak behind you as you look behind, slightly gulping, Sieun.

he said it with a deadpan, lethargic expression. While gripping a paperbag, He had his bag thrown over a single shoulder, the other strap dangling loose.

Taehyun let go of you, looking between you and Sieun. “Woah, you’re with this dude? Didn’t know you have the type y/n.” he said lazily

he suddenly hooked one of his hand in his pockets while running a hand through his hair.

Sieun ignored him, turning his back to Taehyun as if the boy hadn't spoken at all. He looked down at you, his face completely expressionless. "Let's go. We're wasting time."

you only nodded, you thought everything will be okay not until someone threw a piece of sealed pills behind Sieun’s head, the sound of it falling onto the floor made you nervous.

you glance at him and looked at Taehyun, “can you just stop? what the fuck is your problem?” he shook his head and smirked, “problem? I was talking to you until this fucker had to interfere and ignore me” The space between the three of you wasn’t far, he can swing at you anytime.

Sieun kept his eyes forward as you observed him, “Sieun you go ahead, ill just talk with him-“ you were cut off when he pivoted on his heel, sending a sharp, calculated punch aimed straight for the jaw.

you were shock with what you just witnessed, Taehyun was pushed backwards into unopened boxes as he let a groan while touching his jaw, he glared at Sieun who was only looking at him coldly.

Infuriated, Taehyun lunged forward, snapping a vicious kick right toward Sieun’s ribs. Sieun started breathing heavily, as the pharmacists started to gather around telling them to stop it, this is so embarrassing.

when Taehyun was gonna punch Sieun you suddenly came behind him knocking him down with the heel of your foot, his body met the floor.

you quickly got off him and went to your friend, you held him by the arm and inspected his face. “Sieun ah..” you were worried, deeply worried.

He offered no resistance when you grabbed his shoulder. You took the paper bag from his hand and practically pulled him outside, entirely ignoring the pharmacist screaming at Taehyun in the background. In that moment, the noise didn't matter—you were just incredibly glad you had Sieun.

you finally stopped walking, your chest still tight with adrenaline. You looked down at the heavy paper bag you had snatched from his hands.

"What even is this?" you breathed, looking from the bag up to his blank face. "And you didn’t have to fight him off for me"

Sieun quietly reached out, taking the paper bag back from your grip. He opened it, pulled out a specific box of pills, and handed them directly to you.

"For your fever," he said, his voice entirely flat. "You said you felt sick earlier. Take them when you get home."

okay you felt really hot, your face was burning as your grip on your stuff slightly loosened, Sieun cared?

“Thank you.. Sieun.” you paused, this is actually the first time you felt someone actually cared for you, when you get sick your dad will just hand you some money to buy yourself some medicine, no genuine care just command.

“I cant let you home looking like this though.” you continued, he only looked at you unfazed as he gripped the straps of his backpack, you were wondering if he has high tolerance in pain cause you swore you heard his bones snap when he was kicked, or are you just dramatic?

Sieun let out a tiny, barely audible breath through his nose—the closest he ever came to a sigh.

"It just hit my jacket," he muttered, lying smoothly without a single flicker of emotion on his face. "It looks worse than it is. I'm fine."

is he really lying in front of your face? you let a ragged sigh, fever creeping and replacing your flushed face, before you could even confront him about it, you felt really dizzy.

you only nodded, “okay” not being able to form sentences properly cause of the headache, as you started to walk.

Sieun glanced at you confused, why did it feel like you suddenly shut down? he looked down at the paperbag and glanced at you again. He was just gonna triple wash his waterbottle after you drink from it.

he matched your pace as he noticed you softly stumbling, dragging your feet, and even squinting from the discomfort you were going through.

he gently catches your wrist, making you face him suddenly, “stop.” he said quietly, you looked at him confused, face scrunched and nose slightly red.

he reached for his bag and brought a waterbottle out, he twisted the cap open and held it out, pressing the warm like bottle directly against your palm. “drink.” he commanded, his tone blunt but you couldn’t miss the care in his voice. “You need to take this medicine now. Walking away wont make the fever fade.”

you pop open one of the neatly sealed pills, and took the water bottle from his grip, as your warm hand brushed his cold ones. You hate solid medicines, you always have a hard time swallowing it, makes you throw up.

but since Sieun brought these out himself, the least you can do is appreciate his doings. In one gulp you swallowed the pill, your throat bobbed violently as a sudden wave of nausea hits you, you swallow the urge to throw up, you returned him the water bottle as you felt lightheaded.

“you need to rest, lets go.” Sieun spoke while maintaining eye contact with you. He shoved the bottle in his bag, “You go home Sieun ahh, I can go by myself.”

Sieun didn't move an inch. He zipped his bag with a sharp, decisive click and looked at your pale face, completely unbothered by your protest. "You can barely keep your balance," he said flatly. "If you faint on the sidewalk, no one is going to carry you. Move."

you pout slightly, as he trailed behind you.

you arrived at your building, every step up the exterior metal staircase felt like a chore. The heavy clank of your shoes against the hollow metal echoed sharply in the narrow space, sending a fresh spike of pain straight through your pounding headache.

The steps rattled loosely under your weight, making you feel even more dizzy. You stopped infront of your own flat, shuffling through your pockets to grab your keys, you unlocked it and took of your shoes, you looked at Sieun motioning him to do the same, he looked away and started loosening his shoe laces.

exhausted, the first you did was plop onto your bed, the soft covers sinking beside you as you inhaled the daily scent. Sieun finished taking off his shoes as he scanned your room, neatly folded clothes beside your study table, a single plate in the sink, figurines everywhere, and your unmade bed.

He didn’t said anything about it, he only draped his bag neatly over the back of your dining chair, “Where is your thermometer?” he asked flatly, you looked up from your bed, as you sat down. “It’s right here Sieun, I’m fine I swear.” you toyed the protective cover as you looked at him.

He sat down at the edge of your bed still locking his eyes on yours, you crawled towards him as you settled beside him, the comforting warmth made you feel a bit better as you started swinging your legs softly, like a weird habit you suddenly do when your mind is cloudy.

“Take off your jacket” you bluntly said as Sieun looked at you confused a heavy silence fell over the room. His eyes narrowed slightly, he didn't like being perceived as vulnerable.

"Why?" he asked, his voice steady but tense. When you reached out toward his hem, he lightly caught your wrist, stopping you. "It's just a bruise. I don't need you checking it. Go to sleep."

You tilted your head, a faint, tired smirk pulling at the corner of your lips despite the pounding in your skull. "Are you always this stubborn with your doctors?" you teased softly. Then, your smile faded, and you stared at him unblinkingly.

"Let me see it. My fever is making me impatient, and you're not leaving this room until I know you're okay." You spoke feeling the tension coiling around you, he still has his hands wrapped around your wrist softly, your sweater slightly covering the aching part Taehyun left earlier.

“You forced me to take my medicine," you pointed out, a playful glint in your exhausted eyes as you looked down at his grip on your wrist. "So it's only fair I get to check your damage. Lift the shirt, Sieun. Don't make a sick girl fight you for it."

Sieun stared at you, his fingers slowly loosening around your wrist until his hand dropped back to his side. He let out a quiet, defeated breath, realizing your fever-driven stubbornness wasn't going to break.

Without a word, his slender fingers caught the pull-tab of his zipper. The metallic slide cut sharply through the quiet room as he dragged it down. He didn't look at you. Instead, he turned his head to the side, his jaw clenching as his gaze locked onto a random spot on your bedroom wall, completely avoiding your eyes. With one hand, he pulled the edge of his shirt up just enough to reveal his lower abdomen.

There it was—a fierce, angry purple bruise already patterning his pale skin, a violent reminder of the kick from Taehyun.

You didn't reach out to touch it, knowing how much he hated being coddled. Instead, you swallowed hard, the sight making your chest tighten with a sharp pang of guilt. Pushing through the sudden wave of dizziness, you slid off the edge of the bed and stood up.

Sieun’s head snapped back toward you, his brow furrowing in confusion as he watched you walk away. "Where are you going?"

"Stay there," you muttered over your shoulder, gripping the doorframe to steady your spinning vision. "I'm getting an ice pack."

You walked back into the bedroom, the cold condensation of the ice pack numbing your fingers. Sieun was still sitting exactly where you left him on the edge of your bed, his jacket half-open and his expression guarded.

As you neared the bed, you extended your hand, holding the ice pack wrapped in thin cloth out to him.

He looked from the frozen pack up to your face, his eyes searching yours for a quiet second. You half-expected him to argue, to tell you he didn't need it, but the dull ache in his abdomen must have been getting harder to ignore.

Without a word, he reached out and took it from your hands. His fingers brushed against yours in the transition—a brief, freezing spark of contact that made your heart skip despite your fever.

Instead of letting you help him, Sieun adjusted his grip on the ice pack and pressed it firmly against his lower stomach himself. A sharp, quiet hiss escaped his parted lips as the freezing temperature shocked his bruised skin. His knuckles turned white from how hard he was holding it in place, but his face quickly smoothed back into its usual stoic mask.

"You should be in bed," he muttered quietly, his voice dropping as he looked up at you through his bangs. "Stop standing around."

“no thanks.” you said, a heavy, comfortable silence settled over the room. You sat beside him on the edge of the mattress, the freezing air of the ice pack in his hands contrasting with the intense heat radiating from your skin.

"Thank you," you whispered, your voice barely audible over the quiet hum of the apartment. "For everything."

Sieun didn't glance at you. He kept his eyes fixed straight ahead, his posture stiff as he maintained a firm pressure against his bruised stomach. He didn't know how to respond to gratitude; he never did.

But then, the slight space between you vanished.

He felt a sudden, heavy warmth sink against his school jacket. His entire body froze, his breath hitching in his throat as he looked down out of the corner of his eye.

Your head had dropped onto his shoulder, your eyes were closed, your breathing shallow and ragged from the fever as your consciousness finally slipped away into sheer exhaustion.

For a long moment, Sieun didn't move a single muscle, terrified that even a slight shift of his weight would shatter the quiet peace in the room. His heart hammered a little faster against his ribs—not from anger, but from a strange, overwhelming wave of protective instinct.

Slowly, the tension left his shoulders. He relaxed into the touch, letting his frame absorb your weight. He didn't push you away, nor did he wake you up. In the quiet darkness of your room, Yeon Sieun just sat there, quietly anchoring you while the ice melted in his hand.

You are very much aware on what you did, physical contact with Yeon Siuen? but your intrusive thoughts pushed you to your limit as you were to dizzy and tired to even retreat from his shoulder.

You were tired, mentally and physically. The lack of physical contact made you feel insane these past few weeks, normally you would be with your friends but after Jungwon moved schools and your argument with Suho about some girl, you just let it all happen, crumbling down.

to tired to pick up the pieces, you just laid there rotting, waiting for somebody, or even something to come. The feeling made you crazy, as if you were loosing touch in reality. But this? this whole thing with Sieun brought you back, with hope and tenderness.

he loved the comfort you bring, he spent a long time finding answers but he wasn’t aware that you were right in front of him all along