chilli

Dick Grayson x Tartaglia

OKOKOKBUTHEARMEOUTLIKE :

1. both were trained to be child soldiers

2. They both got that flirty friendly persona going on

3. Piercingfuckingblue eyes

4. And we all know damn well Dick has a thing for gingers

*Tim sends a grainy toddler photo of Dick from his circus days*

Jason: Aww you use to be so cute, Dickiebird. What happened to you? 😔

Dick: …Where did you get that??

Tim: I found it :)

*Tim attaches another file of preteen Jason talking to his mum. It’s clearly shot through a window from a rooftop*

Tim: but I took this one !

Jason: TF??? I didn’t even know you?? Do you have more??

Tim: yeah

*Tim sends a picture of baby Damian sleeping. This time it’s shot from the inside of a vent*

Damian: …

Dick: ???

Jason: LMAO WTF

Damian: How did you get past Grandfather’s security?

Jason: Better question, you knew he was alive?

*Tim ignores all questions and attaches a surprisingly high quality selfie of child Tim with red, pudgy cheeks and a toothy grin *

Tim: Wasn’t I cute!

Billy texting Batman a post mission debrief:

Billy: Dr Sivana made a trap for me but I ws hanging w Supes n he got atked instead. Icl the situation fr bad cs yk, weakness to magic, but I clutched and punched the machine rlly hard. Super strength ftw.

Bruce (who definitely knows Cap is a kid and he needs a translator): Please forward this to Red Robin

Chatting in the common area:

Barry (telling a story): and so I told this guy he needs to leave the girl alone or else I’ll throw him to the police and he scoffs at me!!?!

Billy: Nahh what, that’s so cooked.

Clark: Yeah, we can beat bad guys but it’s hard to punch systemic issues.

Hal: No wait. The hell does cooked mean??

Billy (singing): What the helly~

Clark: Language.

Hal: ..?

Barry: …

Billy: Anyways, have you guys heard of the red pill mentality?

Looking at hate mail:

Billy: My suit is ugly?!? They didn’t have to throw the brick at me!!

Diana: Do not worry. These words mean nothing and I shall protect you from all the bricks!

When he was growing up, the circus was always in motion. It’s a place where noise and action are constantly present.

The first time he heard true silence was when a tent full of people collectively froze. When hundreds of pairs of wide eyes and pale faces watched the Flying Graysons fall.

The thing that pierced the silence was Dick’s very own scream, and a sickening splat.

Dick will always remember that helpless moment where all he could do was watch. He will always remember the deafening silence that should never have been heard in his circus.

So when he was adopted by reserved and broody Bruce Wayne, the pain was too fresh and near constantly present. The way Mr. Wayne was all too quiet didn’t help.

He chose to adapt.

He chose to talk.

Even now, he instinctively fills in quiet moments on patrol with quips and bad puns.

B is fussing over him in the Batman way after patrol, but Jason just wants to leave, so he’s dismissively agreeing with everything.

Things are okay between them right now, but it’s not quite comfortable. (It will never be the same as it once was.)

“Check in at the Batcave after the warehouse is clear,” Batman gruffly orders.

Jason rolls his eyes as he responds, “Sure, B.”

“Tread lightly on that ankle.”

“Okay,” Jason says absently, already halfway out the door.

“I also made some enhancements for your armour that you should pick up.”

“Alright.”

“Stay safe.” Batman concludes, in his ever-present flat tone.

And then, Jason doesn’t even think as he ends the conversation with “Okay bye, love you.”

Even though it’s minute, Bruce flinches.

Memories of a younger Jason, Robin, flood his mind. That boyish smile that spread laughter and light amongst Gotham is there. The one that belongs to Bruce’s child who use to share hugs and love no matter the day.

Jason-Robin-gives-me-magic-Todd was truely happy just to be with Batman. He shone the brightest so that Bruce could form the strongest shadow behind him.

But now, as silence envelops the two vigilantes, Jason’s face of shock no longer holds the same light. A natural grimace rests in place of a smile. A jagged J scar is carved into those once-pearly-cheeks, brandishing their gorey tale.

His innocence has been eroded, corrupted by Gotham.

By Bruce.

Bruce knows that he is to blame for Jason’s loss of light. He lost his son and his position as a father that night.

Bruce can’t hear the words “I love you” without hating himself for taking Jason’s love away.

He will never be worthy of love again.

On the other hand, Jason had let the words slip without thinking.

He felt like kicking himself. The situation was beyond embarrassing, infinitely worse than calling your teacher ‘mum’ or something.

(Though, when he reflects on the moment, maybe the slip was his subconscious projecting.

Deep down inside, he’s still a hurting Robin that wants his father’s comfort.)

He’s not prepared for Bruce’s face of horror as he turns around though.

Considering the past few months, he should have been prepared.

It’s just as he thought.

Bruce doesn’t love him anymore.

Jason knew that he’s changed, he will never be the child that he once was.

He grew older. He finally left the nest. He died. He came back.

And it was wrong. With green in his veins and a penchant for murder.

Jason knows that it wasn’t just the Pits. He’s in full control when he kills, and he doesn’t regret it.

He went out and broke Bruce’s fundamental moral code, and even tried to kill another bird.

If Bruce’s rejection wasn’t already clear on his face, then the flinch was definitely enough to sell it.

Bruce’s son died that night in the warehouse, and Red Hood is just the name that’s parading around in a dead child’s body.

Clearly, B’s fussing over his safety was out of his duty to Gotham. He doesn’t love Jason anymore. He loves Gotham.

After all, how could he love a monster?

Clark doesn’t know Bruce is Batman

Bruce doesn’t know Clark is Superman.

They are happily, unsuspectingly dating.

Well it all turns out bad when the batkids start furiously investigating their dad’s partner.

Various level pranks (that probably would cause severe harm if u weren’t vigilante trained or Superman) are enacted. It’s justified because they’re just protecting their father of course.

Jason poisons him with laxatives — to no effect. Damian places needles in his cushion — they all get mysteriously bent. Duke makes the sun shine directly in his eye all eye — he doesn’t even wince.

It gets to the point Clark is caught holding a marble bust of Bruce Wayne in one hand after it had almost crushed him to death. (Thanks Tim)

(pranks inspired by another tumblr post that I don’t have the link to cause I saw it spoken by some ai voice on tiktok. If anyone knows pls tell)

“You’re Superman?!” Gasps the kids.

They seize the opportunity like fish to water, emanating absolutely no guilt.

After convincing Clark that Bruce was big on Batman’s no meta mentality and that he could NEVER tell him otherwise they’ll have to break up, the blackmail begins.

It goes from small flights around Gotham, to fast food delivery service, to forging weapons for them on the top of an ice-capped mountain.

Meanwhile Clark is sweating and convinced this is the only way he can stay with the love of his life. Sure, the children are menaces, but the father’s gorgeous face (and thighs) immediately melts any concerns. It’s not like the tasks cause him any effort anyways.

Well, no effort until the kids are breaking into the Kent farm and suddenly off in deep space with his spaceship.

Now he has to find the love of his life’s kids before they die, or worse, B finds out his identity and breaks up with him. *scandalised gasp*

It sure is convenient timing for Batman to call a Justice League meeting and announce that the two of them are heading of into deep space to find some missing Gotham vigilantes. Maybe he’ll spot the kids while he’s out there too !!

He just has to ignore Batman’s scrutinising, then suddenly understanding gaze as he chills in civilian pjs. Obviously he had to change while they’re contained in their little spaceship that they’re sharing for the next few days.

After a “John Batman”

All they got is Batman the suburb and Batman Park in the city tho..

STILL.

THE ENTIRETY OF MELBOURNE COULD’VE BEEN CALLED BATMANIA??

NAHH THIS IS WILD.

Petition to change the name right now

And add like a few streets named after the Batkids. Like a Nightwing Lane

And rename Lunar Park to Joker’s Funland or something

Ohh and rename a dangerous suburb like Dandenong to Crime Alley..

And for all prime ministers to have to change their first name to Bruce, middle name Wayne.