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does anyone ever think what if neil perry was alive

You ever think about the fact that the last sense to leave after death is hearing which can stay for around 8 minutes so Neil probably just heard dead silence because of how long it took for his parents to find him. You ever think about the fact he died in his father’s office, looking up at all his books and shelves of achievements, just like how he looked up to his father his whole life. Just how he wanted to make him as proud of him as he was of himself. You ever think about how long it took Neil’s parents to find him when he died. How maybe just a small part of him hoped to fail and to be held by his parents one more time. How maybe he hoped to hear a scream or a cry or a sob and a door slamming open, but all he got was the silence and the echo of the gunshot through his house. How he died truly alone and in complete silence. How he always encouraged Todd to speak up and speak out for himself. How he was never quiet. And yet he died quiet. Subdued. Reserved. Alone. Cold.