k

I got a job at a gas station across from a casino and a guy keeps coming in to buy whole cartons of cigarettes and talks in the third person calling himself "snake eyes pete" and every time I tell him his total hes like "tell ya what if old Pete rolls a snake eyes why dont you give it to him for free?" and he rolls the same set of loaded dice on the counter and it does not matter how many times he rolls snake eyes I will not give him the cartons for free he gets so mad

Star Trek mental health counselors at a conference trading horror stories realize they’re all talking about Miles O’Brien.

stalin famously had no shit to say. as proven by 13 tomes of his collected works.

i cant get over the "international hyper minority" like besides just straight up lying and making shit up i mean . Thinking that someone not being american and being multiple things at once makes them SUSPICIOUS and "a bot" or whatever . Like that is straight up racism and also an inability to see the people outside of your empire as human beings it's so fucking embarrassing to read

you're american AND black AND queer ? Looks like a suspicious international hyper minority to me since normal people are from Turkey and not the US .

shes's probably completely capable of understanding why it is wrong to accuse black american bloggers of being "russian bots" as it was done on this website previously. But since the rest of us are ACTUALLY "foreign" and "international" (to WHOM??) we can be accused of being bots. Because we're not American like real people. Awesome

Also sorry I have trouble believing she would say that "international" shit about a UK, French or German or other western european citizen . Or an Australian for example . Like it's transparent as hell lmao

Crystal Palace is the character of all time because she spends the whole show telling everyone (but especially Edwin) that they’re sooo weird and annoying. like can you guys PLEASE be normal for just a second, you’re killing me. but at the same time, she’s in NO WAY the sane one there. girl you’re a psychic who made people walk into traffic recreationally. when someone’s being a dick you physically fight them even when you’ve got your acrylics on. you saw enough weird shit that your asshole boyfriend said “im a demon you should totally let me possess you” you were like “this is not only not weird, it is normal and romantic” you are NOT the barometer for regularness

England isn't a real country, stupid. England is a lie to sell you more Doctor Who

joe biden should do another stimulus check where the ira sends me a lox bagel. with cream cheese please

irs.

The prevalence of the coyote as a trickster in American myth, the jackal as a trickster in African myth, and the fox as a trickster in Eurasian myth proves that the Funny Dogy is a staple across cultures

Amber Volakis is unreal. She showed up, ruined the main character's game show by being a bitch, stole his boyfriend, died in front of him, and proceeded to haunt him for all time

The CIA campaign against Castro will never not be unbelievably embarrassing. How are u recruiting all ur agents from Chop Hoe University and expecting to stand against Aura Farming Founding Father Fidel. the american century of humiliation started in 1960 I swear to god