James tosses him a chocolate frog.
Regulus: Why did you throw that at me?
James: Because I love you.
Regulus: That's not an explanation.
James: It is if you're me.
Sirius: I am begging you to stop.
James: Sorry. Regulus, my dearest, most beloved—
Sirius: Actually, don't stop. Keep talking. Maybe I'll die.
Remus: You're being dramatic.
Sirius: James called my brother "my dearest" before breakfast.
Remus: That's not a crime.
Peter: I think it's kind of sweet.
Sirius: Peter, don't encourage them.
Peter: They're literally just sitting there.
Sirius: You see it, right?
Remus: Regulus is smiling.
Sirius: THAT'S NOT A THING.
James: Reggie smiled at me yesterday.
Sirius: Regulus doesn't smile.
James: He smiled so much, actually.
Regulus: It lasted half a second.
James: The greatest half second of my life.
Sirius: Why are you like this?
James: Because I'm in love.
James: Because I'm in love with Regulus.
Remus: Sirius, you act like you just found them making out in the Great Hall.
Sirius: That happened last week.
James: We were not making out.
Regulus: You're repeating yourself.
Sirius: Because I'm traumatized.
James: Regulus, can I have your hand?
James: I want to hold it.
Regulus: That's ridiculous.
Regulus gives him his hand.
Sirius: Because he said that like he'd just won a business negotiation.
James: Anyway, I have an announcement.
Sirius: If it's about Regulus, I'm leaving.
James: It's about Regulus.
James: Regulus called me handsome this morning.
Sirius: I'M STAYING JUST TO HATE.
Remus: What exactly did he say?
James: I asked if my hair looked alright.
James: He sighed deeply, looked at me, and said, "Potter, unfortunately, you're handsome no matter what you do."
Regulus: It wasn't meant to be.
James: He thinks I'm handsome.
Regulus: That's not the point.
James: He called me handsome.
Regulus: Sirius, make him stop.
Sirius: Absolutely not. This is the first good thing that's happened to me all day.
Regulus: I regret everything.
James: You think I'm handsome.
Regulus: I am literally holding your hand right now. Of course I think you're handsome.
James: HE THINKS I'M HANDSOME.
Sirius: I'M JUMPING OUT A WINDOW.