this is a hideaway

georgian buildings, 18th century oil paintings, bikes with baskets, going to bakeries at 9am, 30 year old leather oxfords, new sketchbooks and watercolour paints, violins, organs, flutes, century old sheet music, concert halls, marble fireplaces, warm rooms, coffee shops at 5pm, oak furniture, and fabric bookmarks, rb if u agree

As a 90′s kid, it blows my mind that origami youtube videos exist. You can look up any model and watch a pair of manicured hands assemble the thing in real time, in full color, in 3D, with cheerful flute music in the background. When I was little, you had a library book with no words and these esoteric little dotted lines and arrows and it was just you, your hands, your paper, and the cruel, uncaring eyes of God.

what’s the difference between a stapler and a sewing machine? a stapler staples and a sewing machine doesn’t

i take it back, these are still funny in a completely different way

What’s the strongest cake in the world? Mike Cake.

What do you call a fish that’s a thief? A sea bass.

What’s the difference between a cow and sheet metal ? None, both of them have milk

I don’t even care if don’t know what the joke is these are hilarious.

Boy pig said to the girl pig: “Let’s suffer.”

What happens when the sheep come to the grass field? Strawberry.

What do you call a cybercriminal cow? Minced meat.

One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten, eleven, twelve, thirteen, fourteen, fifteen, sixteen, seventeen, eighteen, nineteen, twenty. What comes after twenty? Police.

You can’t piano a piano, but you can lean on an elephant.

What’s a pale mammoth? Helmut

What type of bread can’t be eaten? Propane.

What does a bee do at the gym? Zumba.

When is the best time to eat seafood? Wednesday.

What do an orange & an elehpant have in common? They both peel;. 

These all sound like those jokes 4 year olds make up before they fully grasp the concept of a joke

FUCK MAN

NOT RISKING THIS ONE

So much cats.

Money plus cats, what’s not to love?