Welcome to the Devil's Den

Let’s climb on papa :)

My second reaction to this, was "What the fuck."

No matter how small and niche and insignificant something seems, the very act of researching, or spending time with, or caring for it imbues it with meaning.

Now, legally, you can't ask me to do this again.

god has cursed me for my hubris, and my work is never finished.

I'm not your friend, and you have no say over what I do with my body.

Your value is not defined by the size or shape of your body…It’s about what you do with the body you’re given.

I read all this stuff so you don't have to!

I read all 337 books you dingus.

And if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go throw myself into the ocean now.

Now that you're jazzed and ready to go, time to fail.

You gotta give up on your dreams!

I couldn't give a shit about death.

Steal their hats.

Magnificent goals are worth the challenges it takes to reach them.

If I can't be accurate, I sure as hell am gonna be extra.

We are terrified of things we do not yet understand.

I am tormented with an everlasting itch for things to mean something.

When you say crucial, do you...do you mean optional?

Good enough is never enough when one is striving for perfection.

They called me a fool! But do I look like a fool to you?

ooh, look at Gordon Ramsey over here, making WARM MILK

But there's ambition in those eyes.

And if you'll excuse me, I have to go do my dark bidding in these spreadsheets.

You sweet summer child, you babe swaddled in the cashmere blanket of ignorance, YOU ASK TOO LITTLE OF ME!

The days of spring will surely bring the birds and bees cavorting. But since I am a gentleman, I'd much rather be jorting.

What if I'm never gonna die?

Seriously, who knew that my friends were SO GOOD at painting sad clowns?

If you have bugs in your house and you make the conscious decision to WANT those bugs in your house, then they aren't pests, they're pets...s.

Everyone knows that books are boring!

Is life quantifiable?

If you have bugs in your house and you make the conscious decision to WANT those bugs in your house, then they aren't pests, they're pets...s.

I hear you. I hear your questions constantly. They come to me in my dreams like a prophet receiving visions from an angry god.

Once you got that boy under your possession, time to get real into unethical science.

I earn up to $20k a month while working from home, making my own hours, and being my own boss... and you can, too!

Use your hips, but pretend they're not your hips. They're just a long long tube sock filled up with your meat. DANCE!

I don't wanna know what that mouth do

I do think we need a sexy skeleton.

When you walk into an unknown space, I want the first question on your mind to be: Am I safe to smash?

Who hired this man? I don't want him on my job site.

I know he is real, where are you hiding him?

This is a lot of research into things that really have very little meaning.

Look, I don't have to explain everything to you. I'm going through my rebellious phase.

Some of the food... may harm us.

Oh God... am I a buzzkill?

We like watching birds, which is good because we have no choice!

HOW DARE YOU JETTISON MY GIFT!

send one to have our muses meet for the first time.

“Sorry, were you just talking to me?”

“I think you dropped this.”

“You look lost. Need some help?”

“I don’t usually talk to strangers, but…”

“You’re sitting in my spot.”

“Whoa! Careful!”

“We’ve never met, right? You seem familiar.”

“Is that seat taken?”

“Sorry, I think I just spilled something on you.”

“You’re blocking the doorway.”

“Were you just staring at me?”

“Excuse me, do you know the time?”

“Wait — are you the person I’m supposed to meet?”

“I’ve been sent to find you.”

“Please don’t be alarmed, but I think we have the same bag.”

“Do you work here?”

“I’m fairly certain that’s mine.”

“You’ve got something on your face.”

“Sorry, I thought you were someone else.”

“Do you know the way to ___?”

“You’re hurt. Do you need help?”

“That’s a fine ___ (cloak/hat/book/etc.). Where did you get it?”

“This might sound strange, but can I hide behind you for a moment?”

“You look like you could use a friend.”

“I think your dog just stole my lunch.”

“Hey, you dropped your coin purse.”

“I think we’re stuck in here together.”

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to overhear, but…”

“Are you the new neighbor?”

“First time in town?”

“I’m not sure if this belongs to you, but…”

“You look like you’ve seen a ghost.”

“I’ve been hearing a lot about you.”

“Do you mind if I join you?”

“I think you’re in the wrong place.”

“You seem… out of place.”

“Don’t take this the wrong way, but are you following me?”

“That was a close call.”

“Not to alarm you, but someone’s watching you.”

“Mind if I walk with you?”

“You look like you’re in trouble.”

“Was that your doing back there?”

“You don’t look like you’re from around here.”

“That was impressive. How’d you manage it?”

“I’m guessing you’re not here by accident.”

“Do I want to know what just happened?”

“You might want to keep your voice down.”

“Is it always this strange around here?”

“I have a feeling we’re about to become acquainted whether we like it or not.”

𝘎𝘳𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘵𝘶𝘥𝘦, 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘯𝘦𝘤𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘴𝘦𝘭𝘧-𝘭𝘰𝘢𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨