if you're having trouble sleeping the best you can do is put a bright object close to your face and look at it for at least 30 minutes. if that doesn't work you can close your eyes but make sure to think really hard about a bunch of bullshit

do you think two pennies is still enough for the ferryman or has inflation driven up the fare

if he makes me use an app I am simply not crossing the river Styx.

let’s all quit our jobs and just go on walks

going to get my blood tested and dr acula and nurse feratu walk in. hope everything is ok

a red string of fate can be a leash. if you're enlightened

every time someones says "hey how are you" and i say "good" and forget to add the "how about you?" i feel like i've missed a quicktime event

slime monster obama: my jello americans