phia goth

I just wrote a chapter of fanfic so long it won’t let me post on here rip 😔

I’ve been thinking about this concept that some members of Gen Z are too puritanical about sexuality and self expression. Obviously the latter is very much so because of “cringe culture” and having everything be ridiculed publicly and having everything being filmed. For the former I think it’s much more complicated, 1. I feel a lot of generations end up acting against the previous kinda in a teen rebellion way. So millennials and Gen X were a bit more wild and partied and had lots of sex so naturally their kids might push against that out of pure rebellion and finding their own path. 2. I think we have been so heavily exposed to not only just sexuality amongst adults but also perverse adults praying on children. That has ALWAYS existed but we are seeing constant video evidence of it and sharing our stories constantly, which is good of course but I think the sheer amount of terrible information we are absorbing at lightning speeds is cause some borderline agoraphobia in some of us lmao. Same thing with more knowledge around sexual health risks and emotional risks, a lot of us have so much fear it’s impending our ability to live life the way other generations were able to. I truly hate where we are with technology and I’m very scared we are never going to be able to experience adulthood the way Gen X and millennials did. Financially, socially, sexually, we are very scared and as others have said a scared animal cannot act on instinct! That’s my rant for the day… I hate today!

You know what maybe I’m just evil but a huge part of me wanted Oliver to actually be playing Caroline the whole time too… like his whole monologue about seeing angles and getting what he can would’ve been such good foreshadowing and the fact that she was always the one to go in a rob banks and be the face of it really had me thinking this was just another scam on his part…. I know even sadder but fuck it would’ve been so good I think that’s why I’m so meh about the story BUT I love that the director, same dude who did dinner in America, has a really fun insight on what women dream of like both stories felt like fanfic in the absolute best way possible!!

I’m legit gonna write a Simon (dia) fanfic because I’ve read them all….

If I had a nickel for every time a Kyle gallner movie ended like *that* I’d have two nickels which isn’t a lot but it’s weird it’s happened twice right?

You know what I actually don’t want to be cool I would like to simply not exist at all

Yall I think Kyle gallner has taken Norman reedus’ spot in my heart….. crazy

Yall my life is falling apart and the only thing keeping me going is Hudson Williams GOD BLESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

You know what I hate and love about life? That you don’t want to waste it but you don’t really know how to not waste it… and no one can tell you how to not waste it because it’s you’re life and only you, if even you, are the only person who can find true fulfillment for yourself. God I feel like I’m wasting it already.

My dream life is to be in a loving, amazing, long term relationship with a man whom I’m not legally married to. No kids, just dogs and cats. Shit, maybe horses? And we ride/work on motorcycles and cars. We eat good, have great friends and family, and have amazing sex all the time….. I’m manifesting this soooo bad.