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@sonsoftitan

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sorry I can’t hang out tonight. yeah I’m busy freaking out over things that might not even happen. yeah it’s gonna take a while
you know you’re fucked when you start to get the “they would not fucking say that” feeling about The Character’s canon dialogue. no hope at all
"this is what ive BEEN saying" - me about a thought that 99% only exists in my brain and i maybe mentioned briefly in one tag once

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i love saying "walk with me" before proposing a headcanon with little to no canon evidence. lets journey together. i will show you the way 🫴
is that song actually character-coded or is your brain a character-shaped hammer looking for lyrics to nail down somewhere
Here I am, 2:06 am - unable to sleep because my dumbass thought of all the orders I have to do for august so naturally, I’m stressing tf out. I know I’ll get them done, I know I will, but my brain chemistry doesn’t seem to fully understand that. Dylan stirred and though he was barely conscious asked if I was okay and when I responded yes, he got comfy again ready to instantly fall asleep, but not before saying “you know I love you, and I appreciate how hard you work” because he fucking KNOWS. And I know that tomorrow he’ll clean the house and try to take Lilly as much as he can even while he works his own full time job because he’d do anything to ease the stress even a little bit. But he doesn’t realize just how much that helps, and that’s why I know I’ll get my work done.
Reblogging this for myself because it’s been almost three years since this post and I still have nights like these - which naturally means that Dylan’s always been right: I will be OKAY.
"who said that" is a powerful spell that casts a defensive bubble around your most vulnerable thoughts
i’m in the middle of building my cyberdeck and I’m actually giddy af cause I’m just using shit I have around the house to make the inside of it for the parts to sit in - that means a lot of cardboard and glue which makes it sound like a kindergarden project but I swear it’s not 😭

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okay but what if in the moments where v's head was quiet and johnny just had to say something, he started teaching her music instead. not intentionally at first - he'd mutter incomplete lyrics while they waited around for v's mark to show up, or strum an unfinished melody while v oiled her guns on the couch next to him. v's definitely annoyed at first so she ignores him and keeps moving as though she doesn't hear him - but his words and tunes are quite literally stuck in her head and so one day she starts finishing them for him. soon they're writing full songs - v doesn't realize it because they're usually silly songs that help them pass time, songs about shithead badges and disgusting food in pouches. but soon she finds herself building choruses and bridges from words out of her lived experiences and johnny is there to find the tune, or change a word that'll make the verse flow better.
"you know you just wrote a whole damn song, right?" "i was just ranting." "no, you started with a verse about growing up in heywood, tied it back around to jackie, then you repeated the first line at the end. that's structure - listen," his fingers start strumming a melody that she'd been humming, but his chords completed it - the tune wrapping itself around her words perfectly. "you hear it now?" he asked with a grin, because of course she heard it.
"you absolute bastard."
Say what you will about the writing in Cyberpunk: Edgerunners, but the campaign ending in a TPK because the players decided to conduct a frontal assault against the local dragon analogue in spite of the GM clearly and repeatedly signposting that they should run away is the most true to source a tabletop RPG adaptation has ever been.
one of the most underrated but brilliant parts of cyberpunk that i have been admiring as i get close to the end of my second playthrough is how v's dissolution into johnny is so innocently integrated into the gameplay as a series of fun silly or mechanically powerful loot drops. on a gameplay level its a fun incentive to do side quests! look! you can get johnny's super powerful and sleek gun! how fun! you can get his unique custom paint job car! how cool! you can get a samurai replica jacket like the one v wore in the game's promotions! how silly! you can find his pants and shoes and glasses and look just like him! how sweet! he gives you his dog tags! you might not think twice about it as the player. it's just a bunch of cosmetic quest rewards, after all. but... in world? on a story level? what does it look like to vic? to misty? when v shows up for some cyberware upgrades driving johnny's car, in johnny's pants, in johnny's jacket, in johnny's glasses, in johnny's shoes, with johnny's gun at their hip and johnny's name around their neck? is that still v in there? do they even know what it looks like? do they even care? is that still v in there? is that still v in there? it seems like just a fun little easter egg but what does it look like to the people who are watching their friend dissolve into someone else in front of their eyes?
Psst, hey, Marilyn Monroe’s image as a freewheeling sexpot was a carefully constructed lie. The real Marilyn Monroe was a roiling tragedy and her life was an indictment of our society as a whole. She was orphaned after her mother had a schizophrenic breakdown, bounced around between foster homes where she was sexually abused, and married a 21-year-old at 16 to get out of being sent to an orphanage. Hugh Hefner published nude photos of her without her consent that were taken when she was 23 and desperate. She suffered severe anxiety and depression, which she coped with by drinking and using barbiturates, and was already a full-blown addict when she became famous in the mid-50s. Her career was one of exploitation, condescension and alienation, and she killed herself at 36. That Hugh Hefner, a man who was at best an unpleasant footnote in her life, felt entitled to be buried next to her is one more humiliation in a pop cultural landscape we should all be ashamed of.
“Please don’t make me a joke… I don’t mind making jokes, but I don’t want to look like one… I want to be an artist, an actress with integrity..”
- Marilyn Monroe, last taped interview, days before her death
She deserved better than this
Can I just also say, in addition to all this, that I’m still pissed off about the fact that Joe DiMaggio swooped in and gave Marilyn a Christian funeral before her Rabbi could return from a trip overseas? ‘Cause that shit is fucked up.
So many men who claimed to be in love with her, and not one could fucking respect her wishes, even in death.
“I’ve never fooled anyone. I’ve let people fool themselves. They didn’t bother to find out who and what I was. Instead they would invent a character for me. I wouldn’t argue with them. They were obviously loving somebody I wasn’t.”” — Marilyn Monroe
Also:
As one of the biggest Ella Fitzgerald fans, she literally helped desegregate her performances. Ella was not allowed to play at Mocambo because of her race.
Ella Fitzgerald: “I owe Marilyn Monroe a real debt… she personally called the owner of the Mocambo, and told him she wanted me booked immediately, and if he would do it, she would take a front table every night. She told him – and it was true, due to Marilyn’s superstar status – that the press would go wild. The owner said yes, and Marilyn was there, front table, every night. The press went overboard. After that, I never had to play a small jazz club again. She was an unusual woman – a little ahead of her times. And she didn’t know it.” thisisnotmyfairytaleendingg (Source: dmvnessa)
ALSO:
In August 1956, Monroe began filming The Prince and the Showgirl, with Laurence Olivier staring and directing. The production was complicated by conflicts between him and Monroe. He angered her with the patronizing statement “All you have to do is be sexy” and his attempts to get her to replicate Vivien Leigh’s interpretation. She became pregnant and miscarried during the production, which heavily worsened her depression and increased her drug abuse.
A L S O , I will never forget watching a documentary about her once and, speaking about her marriage with Arthur Miller, the narrator said, verbatim: “America’s Brain had married America’s Body”. Like, literally, because he was a famous writer, he was entitled to personhood; she, being an actress, and a beautiful woman, was reduced to being “a body”. I have never been more enraged with her portrayal in the media. If you want to be dismissive of her, literally come for you.
She was also chronically ill her whole life: she suffered from endometriosis with pain so debilitating that a clause was written into her contracts accounting for the days when she would not physically be able to work during her periods.
She was on courses of strong medication, had invasive surgery to try and limit the damage caused, and despite trying for a baby numerous times, suffered many miscarriages because of her condition. The miscarriages especially sent her into deep depression, since she desperately wanted to be a mother.
There is speculation that the condition may have been one of the triggers in her drug dependency as well, because when you have endo, you will take whatever you can to stop. it. hurting.
Marilyn Monroe was smart and strong as hell in a world that saw her as a sexy doll and nothing more.
She deserves better
Marilyn was a founding member of the Hollywood branch of the Committee for a Sane Nuclear Policy and had lifelong left-wing political views with a particular emphasis on racial equality. She formed her own independent production company that survived for several years and earned a credit as an executive producer on several films. Additionally, she was not only concerned for workers rights, she acted for them, using her own fame to stop staff being unfairly sacked from several of her films. She was a loyal, kind woman and her early death remains a great tragedy. Worse still, as OP notes, is the co-opting of her image by exactly the sort of people she would have loathed in life.
They just found some trouble to get into

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[Nightshade Ceramics]
Illo no.3 in a courier fox adventure series I seem to be making
btw it's so fucking stupid you can be anxious physically in your body even after you've decided mentally you don't care. I'm supposed to be in charge here