inactive

I used to be a varsity swimmer, and I was damn good, but I was forced into it by my parents and completely lost my love for it and therein my drive. But in high school I was swimming against such talented swimmers like Olympic Swimmer Missy Franklin. I’ve met her, and the main difference between her and me was that I was strong but had no passion, but she was strong BECAUSE she had passion. 

And I could have been good, really good, maybe even Olympic good. I even have the predisposition for it, been swimming since I was 2 years old, have a mom who was almost an olympic swimmer. Missy didn’t have either of those things, she just wanted it, loved it, had been doing it for a long time, and decided she was going to kick ass at it.

Right, that’s great and all, but I completely missed my opportunity to be an olympic swimmer, yeah? and can never achieve those dreams I had as a kid? No, not even though. There was this whole thought that female athletes peak when they’re 17 years old and lose their skills quickly after that, and male athletes peak around 19. But then Olympic Swimmer Dara Torres shows up. She was an olympic swimmer when she was 17, 21 and 25. Pretty normal age for retirement. She had a few kids. She kicked butt at being a mom. 

And then at 33 years old she decides she’s bored or something gets back in shape and kicks so much ass at the trials that she lands herself on the Olympic Team ONCE AGAIN. And then 8 years later, she decides, heck I’m 41 now, no one has ever made the olympic swim team as old as I am, I want to get in shape yet again and teach these children how sports work.

And she still has the record for oldest US Olympic Swimmer, not even any men have beat out that record.

So basically what I’m saying is you could be an olympic swimmer, you really could be. And there are obviously a lot of things stopping you and trying to get in your way: your brain, society, too much chocolate cake for example. But if you really dedicate yourself to it and love it with all of your heart you could, you really could.

And lets say olympic swimming isn’t your jam? That’s cool too. There isn’t a single skill in this world that you can’t learn if you absolutely love it and want to. Any skill you want is going to take time. There are countless famous people who started learning a skill after 20, 30, 40, or even 50. Not a single person has even been president under age 35 (most likely because you’re not allowed to be, but there’s a reason for that). Whatever you want to do you’re probably going to be bad at first, and I’m talking really shitty.

Van Gogh got started in his 20′s and was thought to have no artistic talent at first and was forced to sit in the back of classrooms where the worst artists in the class sat. So yeah you’ll probably be bad, like really bad and everyone including you will think you’re bad. If you stick with it though, if you’re willing to work for years and years, if you keep loving it after all the pain it’s given you, 

then you might just paint Starry Night.

Imagine Bessie and Creeley being happy. Kissing and holding hands in public. Declaring their love on rooftops. Eating Ice cream, sitting on the bench watching the town. Imagine the whole farmers strike ending peacefully and Bessie and Creeley leave that godforsaken town. Imagine them moving into a nice home together, with a white picket fence and all. Imagine Seth and Amelia with moving boxes helping out and DL (Yes he’s still alive we don’t talk about ep 9) is standing there writing everything down in his little notebook. 

Imagine Bessie getting a job as a waitress in the local pub and she cries happy tears because for the first time in her life she has a job where people respect her. Creeley hugging her and kissing her on her forehead, smiling that amazing smile. 

Imagine Creeley hanging up his gun for the last time. The scars on his sides never being touched again after the Strike. 

Imagine Bessie telling Creeley she’s pregnant. Imagine Creeley’s reaction, excitement, fear and he bursts into tears. Crying, because he never thought he’d have this, he never thought he’d have a home, a wife and children. He never thought he would be a good enough man to ever have those things.

Imagine Creeley when the baby starts to walk, starts to talk, starts to run and crawl and call him “Dadda” 

Imagine Bessie walking into the bedroom late at night from a late shift at the pub, waitressing and finding their baby sucking their thumb and on top of Creeley, and their both sound asleep. 

Imagine when their kids and oh yes they’d probably have two or three more after the first, growing up in a loving, caring protecting home. Giving them all the love that Creeley and Bessie never received. Creeley swearing that he’d never lay a hand on his children like his father. Imagine, Creeley, teaching his kids respect, to love others, to feel with your heart. 

Imagine when their eldest brings home their first girlfriend/boyfriend, don’t you dare tell me Creeley wouldn’t just smile and pull out another chair at the dinner table, but after hours, threatening them, “If you ever hurt my baby I swear I will find you and I will kill you.” 

Imagine Bessie and Creeley with a happy fulfilled life with all their kids and dogs and growing old together, laughing on their porch in their rocking chairs eating ice cream.

Someone reached out to me recently, asking if I had any advice for someone wishing to become friends with their professors or teachers. In the past, I have offered singular responses to anonymous asks, and bits of advice for people who contacted me directly with a question, but I thought now after two years of being outside my institution to reflect upon what I did to have the relationship with my professor that I have now. This advice can be used for anyone who wishes to develop a friendship or mentor-like relationship with professionals in their lives. Please keep in mind that this is primarily based upon my experiences with my professor. Her personality, her perspectives, and her values, as do mine, impact our relationship, and my experiences with her. You may have a different reality than I do, which is fine, but just keep that in mind as you read.